Cheating and leaving a man is a small death. How to survive betrayal

You have experienced so many pleasant moments together, shared joy and sadness, holiday and everyday chores, and made plans.
Then they somehow moved away from each other a little, more and more complaints began to appear, in the end the husband said that he loved someone else and left. How to cope with such a situation and come out of it with dignity? How to force yourself to think about the future if there is such a wound in your soul? And finally, how can you believe that there is always a way out of any situation? From this article you will learn:

• For what reasons do husbands leave their families?
• How to behave correctly for a woman whose husband has left her
• Is it necessary to return a husband who has left for someone else, and how to do it?
• How to forget a husband who left for another
• What kind of woman do you need to be so that your husband does not leave for another?

Why do husbands leave families?

Left alone, a woman torments herself with the same question: “Why did my husband leave for another?” According to men, the reasons for a husband leaving the family can be completely different, but we can identify the main, most common ones. Knowing the solutions to a possible problem will make it much easier to prevent it.

• Lost interest in a woman.

Everyday life, everyday life, problems, and work gradually dull passion, making family life look like “Groundhog Day.” Monotony and routine can ruin any relationship. They definitely need to be diluted with something new, bright, causing a surge of positive emotions. Think about a romantic dinner, a picnic with friends, or going to a sports game together. Do not forget about your impeccable appearance, good mood and tenderness towards your husband.

• Lack of sex.

Men attach more importance to sex than women. If a man is satisfied, then it is much more difficult to seduce him. Try to add variety to your intimate life, do not have sex on a schedule.

One man said: “Girls see expressions of love in flowers, gifts and material goods. And men - in affection and love. They need to be loved, to see masculine strength in them. This creates sexual desire in them.”

• Financial difficulties.

Modern instability sooner or later confronts any man with financial problems associated with job loss, lack of clients, and low salary. A wise woman will always find the strength to support her husband, convince him that these are temporary troubles, and give him faith in his strength and success. A stupid woman will do the opposite: she will nag, start quarrels, endlessly show dissatisfaction and express reproaches. One day, for her husband, someone will appear with whom he will feel calm and comfortable, fresh ideas and new horizons will arise. And the abandoned wife will only have to wonder why her husband left for another.

• Different tempers.

Different life values, loss of respect for each other, lack of restraint in expressions and emotions, lack of desire to give in, inciting quarrels on everyday grounds (a cup is out of place, scattered socks, crumbs on the table, and so on) - all this gradually eats away tender and warm relationships between spouses. In their place comes fatigue and alienation. Constant scandals and reproaches can turn away even the most loving husband. Instead of turning into a grumbling old woman, try to solve all problems calmly and peacefully. Do not remain silent about them, but look for a compromise solution that equally satisfies both sides. The husband should return home with joy. It is in your hands to make him drawn to the family, to you, and not to the bar with his girlfriends.

• Wife's appearance.

It often happens that a woman, after getting married, stops taking care of herself. Such ladies are sure: her husband doesn’t care whether her hair is washed, whether her clothes are clean, whether she takes care of herself or not. But a plump figure, unkempt hairstyle, complete lack of makeup, manicure and pedicure do their job very quickly. And now this wife, snacking on a grief cake, complains to everyone that her husband has left for another woman. A self-respecting girl would never allow this to happen. Always be blooming, positive, well-groomed and compliant, then your happiness will always be nearby.

• Nepotism.

Being married, a woman must treat her husband's relatives with respect. Having found a common language with your mother-in-law, you gain an invaluable ally who guarantees you at least 20% of family happiness. But if the marital relationship is not going well anyway, and even if your mother is against you, such a marriage will not last long. Try to become friends with your husband's mother. You have nothing to share, you have a common goal - to make your family happy. Don't forget about his brothers and sisters. A large family at one table - it’s so wonderful!

• Loss of leadership position.

A woman should not forget that it is important for a man to be a leader in the family. It’s stupid to always insist on your own and strive to leave the last word for yourself. A normal man cannot stand such a relationship for long. Very often in such situations, the husband leaves the family for another woman, who makes him understand that he is the winner and the head of the family. A wise wife always remembers that her husband is the head, and she is the neck. Where the neck turns, the head follows.

• Marital infidelity.

Our list of reasons ends with adultery. Statistics show that only 10% of families break up precisely because of infidelity. But if you look at the root of the problem, it becomes clear that betrayal does not arise just like that, but as a result of dissatisfaction with family life.

Breakup Behavior

When the husband left the family, how to behave? To survive the blow, you need to apply the advice of a psychologist:

• Don't try to keep a man who has decided to break up with you. Neither tears nor begging will help you;
• When you say goodbye to your man, be calm and friendly;
• Thank your man for the years of married life you have lived together. Finally, remember the most pleasant and bright moments of your life together;
• Take care of your appearance. Don’t even think about appearing in front of him crying or unkempt. Let him see what a beautiful girl he is losing.

Don’t play the role of the victim, even when you really want to do it in order to pity him. Men are very irritated by tears and humiliation from a woman. A man will try to escape from an uncomfortable situation as quickly as possible, so as not to observe such a picture. If you want to return your husband to your family, then this material will help you.

How to behave correctly with your husband if he has left for another

My husband left for someone else, how to survive this event? How to accept that your guesses about the existence of a rival turned out to be true? He packed his suitcase and closed the door behind him, leaving your question, “Why is that?” no answer.

If you look at the situation from the outside, it’s easy to say: “Forget, don’t cry! Don’t give up, everything will work out.” But you lived together for many years, shared joy and pain, made plans for a future together. And now there is no real one, because without your beloved husband it seems dull and dull to you. You blame yourself for not always being tolerant and affectionate with him, for being able to express dissatisfaction and be offended over trifles. But what's the point of tormenting your soul with these thoughts? They won't bring my husband back. And do you need someone who could at once erase everything that you have been creating for years? The best thing you can do for yourself in this situation is to try to calm down so as not to fall into depression, understand your mistakes and not make them again.

Watch the video and remember what to do if your man has someone else:

There is only one way to cope with this situation with dignity - to let it go. And she will gradually let you go. Try to look at the events that happened from the other side: you are now a free and independent woman. This is full of advantages. Stop crying. To do this, sit comfortably, close your eyes and relax. Imagine a stream of clean, cool water flowing down you from the top of your head to your heels, taking away all your problems and failures. They are no longer with you.

Life turns out differently. It hurts when you are abandoned. But since he threw it away, it means he didn’t appreciate it. Why waste your energy on someone who doesn’t care about your pain, if there may be a reliable and warm, but different shoulder nearby? By holding onto pieces of the past, you can easily miss the present and future. And if you understand this, then you will win a moral victory over the situation, and there is only one thing left: to step over it with your head held high.

My husband left for someone else. Several rules will teach you how to survive this event with dignity. Following them will prevent you from breaking down.

1. You shouldn’t look for meetings with your ex-husband, call him and beg him to come back.

No amount of persuasion can make him love you; if feelings have faded, then they can no longer be rekindled.
Respect yourself. He may be a wonderful person, but there are a lot of worthy men around you. There are close people next to you who so need your care and affection. They care about you and love you. Pay more attention to children, parents, pets. When you give love, you always get it back like a boomerang. What good is it if the prodigal husband returns? Your relationship will never be the same. The pain experienced will not allow you to trust him. Suspicions and unspoken grievances will always stand between you, giving rise to more and more new quarrels.

1. Learn to switch your thoughts and not constantly think about your husband leaving.

This sad fact has already happened. So why hurt yourself again, remember how he left, and relive everything again? Gather your will and get to work. There is no need to share your experiences with colleagues. It’s better to ease your soul and be frank with your mother or girlfriend. If your husband has left for someone else, advice from loved ones will help you get through this. But do not turn such conversations into a tradition, so that constant conversations on this topic do not imperceptibly lead you into a state of depression from which it is not so easy to get out.

The most important thing is to try to calm down and understand that life is not over. Don't let pain torment your heart. Drive it away, filling yourself with strength and faith in a better future. For many women, separation from their husband became the impetus for their own success.

1. You can see your ex-husband if you work together or while he is with the children.

At such moments, avoid expressing reproaches and accusations. Do not complain to him, so as not to look helpless and weak in his eyes. This won't get him through.

No matter how badly you think about him, in conversations with friends, loved ones or even with him, do not shift all responsibility for what happened only to him. In such situations, both spouses are usually to blame. Your accusations will only increase his negative attitude.

1. You should not prohibit your ex-husband from communicating with your children.

Manipulations like “you won’t see the children again” do not bring the desired result. Even if they awaken remorse and guilt in him, they will not change his attitude towards you. He will still be a stranger.

1. Do not try to talk to your rival, call her, meet and sort things out.

Don’t ask your friends about her or the details of their lives. Never compare yourself to her. The fact that she may be more beautiful and younger than you means absolutely nothing. This is not the main thing for you now. Don't create self-doubt.

You need to let go of the problem so that pain, resentment and stress go away along with it. Try to understand that nothing can be changed with tears, requests, threats, or hysterics. Only a cool mind will help you find peace and peace of mind, gain strength and start over from scratch.

Recommended articles on this topic:

• Why the husband does not sleep with his wife: problems and their solutions
• How to create and maintain trust in a relationship with a man
• A man does not respond to SMS: why this happens and how a woman should react

How to cope with your husband's departure, how to behave

The first days after my husband leaves are the most difficult. Self-flagellation will not help. We need to find the strength to make our own changes, support our children (they should not feel guilty), and restore spiritual harmony.

Advice from psychologists will help with this:

Be sure to read:

How to survive a separation from your wife: 5 mistakes men make after divorce

Is it worth returning a husband who left for someone else?

Before looking for a solution, try to calmly analyze the situation and honestly answer the following questions:

1. Is there really no anger in your heart towards your ex-husband? Are you able to completely forget about the betrayal and forgive him?
2. Will you be able to live under the same roof with him again, trust him and make common plans? If he does return, will your relationship be harmonious? What thoughts will you have if he is late at work or goes on a business trip?

If you couldn't forgive the betrayal, what's the point of bringing back the past? The resentment has not gone away. It will constantly emerge, giving rise to quarrels, scandals, and attacks of unreasonable jealousy. Your negative memories will not allow you to build harmonious relationships. As a result, you will get stuck in constant family squabbles, making everyone unhappy, especially the children who will be forced to watch it all.

My husband left for someone else. How to behave in order to still get him back? Are you ready to forget everything that happened like a bad dream and never think about it? Then you need to be patient.

You must understand that this is now a strange man who thinks about another woman, connects his future with her and is offended by you.

That is why the ex-wife does not have to return the person with whom she lived for many years, but build a relationship from scratch. This is a completely different man for you, with different views, thoughts and feelings.

The return of your husband is possible if, after a long process of self-improvement, you appear before him as a different woman, positive and renewed.

However, attempts to return a man are not always successful. No psychologist can predict how events will develop. But there is always a chance, it is important not to miss it.

If your husband has left for another woman, you should not count on his quick return to the family. Such decisions are not easy for men. Most likely, before taking this step, he weighed and thought about everything. Therefore, you also need a consistent and thoroughly thought-out plan.

Only extremely fortunate circumstances can hasten his return.

There is no doubt that your opponent may make the same mistakes as you. But, if she managed to take a man even from children, then she is clearly not stupid. Accordingly, by waiting patiently you will not achieve anything. We need to act. Competently and subtly.

Something like this:

• first, let your emotions subside and soberly assess your situation;
• try to listen to your husband, without expressing insults and reproaches, but trying to understand what he is thinking about and how he feels about the current situation. A man has the right to make his own decisions concerning his life;
• try to reconcile and let go of the situation, at least for a while. Do not disrupt the rhythm of your normal life by plunging into melancholy and despondency;
• Don't let depression take over your thoughts. Force yourself to constantly do something, get distracted, communicate;
• don't give up. This is a reason for self-improvement, gaining self-sufficiency and independence;
• relations with your ex-husband should be neutral. There is no need to conflict or overplay. Casual friendly communication is quite enough;
• find common ground and support common interests, for example, children's issues, hobbies or business;
• learn to be happy without him./li>

Statistics say that 85% of men like confident women. Therefore, completing the last point of our plan should be your priority.

As soon as you realize your exclusivity and self-sufficiency, you will look at everything around you differently. Nobody knows whether you will want to reconnect your life with the man who once betrayed you. It is quite possible that a more worthy representative of the stronger half of humanity will capture your heart and attention, which will naturally make the problem of returning your ex-husband irrelevant.

Interesting video about how to survive a divorce:

Five stages of bereavement (loss) of a loved one

Stage 1. Denial

This could have happened to anyone, but not to me!

You've probably heard about similar stories, but you find it hard to believe that this happened to you. Separation and impending loneliness are so frightening that you don’t understand how to live on. During this period, a person does not experience pain; he seems to become impervious to pain. The person does not understand what happened.

Stage 2. Anger

How could he do this to me? I don't deserve this kind of treatment!

Sadness and misunderstanding turn into rage, and you are sometimes frightened by the intensity of your hatred for your ex-partner. Because of resentment and bitterness, injustice and humiliation, you feel helpless and very angry. Anger is always a defense against more painful feelings living inside you.

Stage 3. Activity

You start to think: “What if?..”

You are looking for possible options to get rid of pain and change a terrible situation. These searches cause a surge of energy. You become creative. Take every chance to restore your relationship.

There is an awareness of your mistakes and hope for correcting them.

Many women come to a psychologist just at this moment with a request to return their husband. With a great desire to change, to become different. Or they begin to negotiate with God or the Universe, promising to do anything if the relationship is restored. Some turn to fortune tellers and clairvoyants.

But all actions are in vain. Nothing changes.

Stage 4. Depression, loneliness

After a rise in energy and an emotional outburst, even deeper disappointment and severe devastation sets in.

Powerful sense of loss, loneliness

, sadness, powerlessness, inability to change anything and general fatigue from the world - this is what a woman feels at this stage. She has difficulty getting up in the morning to go to work or do household chores.

of depression appear

: lack of appetite, sometimes – reluctance to see or communicate with anyone, as well as tears, insomnia or, conversely, constant drowsiness.

Stage 5. Acceptance of the situation and the desire to get out of this state. Journey within yourself

A strong desire to heal leads you to serious work on yourself. You begin to analyze your relationships, your life, yourself. A natural question arises: “Why did all this happen to me?”

You begin to look for ways to heal emotional wounds, let go of the past, forgive everyone, reconnect with your self and find peace in your soul.

This is the final step that allows you to move on - from divorce to a new, happy life.

And I also want to tell you: do not pay attention to the words of your friends that you should shake yourself up and pull yourself together. Now it is very important for you to go through all the stages of grief. Remember: “The night is always darkest before the dawn.”

Loss is a very painful test in a woman’s life, but it leads to internal transformation and purification of the soul.

When going through all these stages, it is very important that you have people around you who are ready to support and understand you. The person who will help you understand everything that happened will guide you through all the difficulties of separation.

Who is this? A close friend, mother, spiritual teacher, psychologist - it doesn’t matter. The main thing is that you should feel that you are not left alone with your suffering.

How to forget your husband forever after he leaves for another

Divorce was inevitable: the husband left for someone else. Gathering all her will into a fist, the woman decides that she has had enough of tears, she needs to throw the whole past out of her head and learn to live in a new way. She understands that it will not be easy, because a lot is connected with him: children, mutual friends, home, things. Taking it all at once and forgetting everything won’t work. However, just like it is impossible to glue something that is already broken into pieces. There are several tips from psychologists on how to leave your husband in the past and boldly step into a bright future.

• Try to fully occupy your free time: move more, meet with girlfriends and friends more often, take walks. Go in for sports, purchase a membership to a swimming pool or fitness club.
• Dejection destroys. Don't let it take over you. Drive away all sad thoughts, don’t stress yourself out. Think positively, try to find something good even in unpleasant situations, rejoice in everything you have.
• You have a great opportunity to pay attention to how many men are around you. Meet people, flirt, go on dates.
• Forget about your ex-husband, do not call or communicate with him on the phone. Do not try to solve your problems with its help, even those related to children.
• Get rid of all his things. Throw away the gifts. Change the decor of your home, replace the furniture, change the interior.
• Make an appointment with a psychotherapist, he will help awaken hidden strengths in you and restore peace of mind.

Instead of shedding tears and spending days thinking that your husband has left for someone else, give your love to your children and loved ones. Don't feel sorry for yourself. The fact that you are alone now does not make life any worse. It is still full of pleasant and unexpected moments. For many women, such a rethinking of the situation became the starting point in a successful career, in creating their own business and gaining financial independence.

Think about whether it is worth fighting for a relationship in which neither your love, nor your tenderness, care, and affection were appreciated. Living and waiting for him to return is extremely stupid. There are a huge number of men around you who would dream of spending at least an evening with you. It is important to see them and switch your attention to a more worthy life partner. The faster you switch, the faster the mental wound will heal. Don't dwell on your resentment, don't blame yourself. What happened cannot be changed. Feel free to step forward, make new acquaintances, build new relationships, develop and do not remember the past, it is gone.

How to get your husband back if he left for someone else, and is it worth doing?

You need to return your husband only if the love has not passed and you have the strength to forgive and start all over again. Getting your husband back by force is almost impossible. Tears and blackmail will cause negativity and rejection on the part of the ex-spouse, the joy of the rival and the pity of others.

There are several ways to make him understand that he has made a mistake:

Constant communication, an attractive appearance, and cheerfulness will make a man look at his ex-wife in a new way. See the girl he fell in love with. Possible scandals on the part of your mistress will make you think about the correctness of your choice.

How to become a woman from whom husbands do not leave

All women's personal lives are different. One meets her soul mate and lives happily with him all her life, the other is in constant search, the third does everything to keep the man, but he still leaves. To the one who didn’t even raise an eyebrow to attract him, who only cares about herself. Even if she is not too beautiful and not a super housewife, it doesn’t matter. She does not consider it necessary to hold on to a man with both hands and will easily let him go if he tries to change her.

There are women to whom men are drawn like a magnet. They think about them, dream about them, rush to them. At the same time, the woman does not make any effort, she simply lives in harmony with herself and her principles.

1. Marriage is not the goal of life.

Psychologists have long noted that the personal life is excellent for those women who do not set the main goal of their life to find a man and marry him. You cannot connect all your dreams and aspirations only with this. The man you love is just a small part of your life. Besides marriage, there are a great many ways to realize yourself and find happiness.

1. No dependency.

If you admit the thought that you can leave a man at any time, then you are independent. A free woman is always interesting, attractive and does not give you the opportunity to relax. If everything is the other way around, and all your thoughts are only about him, then you will soon become a burden for him, from which it will be a relief to get rid of.

1. The desire for comfort.

A woman is truly the keeper of the family hearth. It is she who creates a cozy and calm environment, warms and gives comfort. Taking care of your husband does not mean that you need to do everything for him. Women's care means delicious food, clean linen and a warm smile. This is extremely important for a man.

1. Financial burden.

It’s great if spouses are financially independent from each other. If a man gives his salary to his wife, then he should always have a certain amount left for personal expenses. It’s a humiliating situation when a man asks for the money he’s earned. You shouldn’t allow this if you don’t want your beloved husband to leave for someone else.

1. Versatility.

By focusing on one thing: housekeeping, sex or motherhood, you risk quickly boring your husband, because monotony is tiring. It's good if you become, first of all, friends. You can share your joy or problem, talk about any topic, laugh, get advice, and get support in difficult times. Such a woman is every man's dream.

1. Down with hysterics.

Even the most positive people are sometimes irritated and in a bad mood. But no self-respecting man will allow you to constantly take it out on him and will not listen to your complaints day after day. If you want to lose a man, continue to nag him, suspect him, create scenes of jealousy, and manipulate sex. Very soon you will turn from a dream girl into a hysterical woman from whom you want to leave quickly.

1. Firestarter.

You won’t see a dream woman at home in a dirty robe and with disheveled hair. Men love with their eyes, so they attach a lot of importance to appearance. This does not mean that you have to wear silk lingerie and heels at home; just looking neat and well-groomed is enough. You should also not give all your attention to your appearance. Read, engage in self-development, broaden your horizons and be interesting, first of all, to yourself.

1. Hobbies.

The more points of contact spouses have, common interests, hobbies, hobbies, the closer they are to each other. Lack of hobbies and wasting time makes a person boring.

1. Weakness and stupidity are two different things.

A woman's weakness attracts a man. Against her background, he feels significant, strong, courageous. But weakness and stupidity are completely different things.

1. Self-respect and love.

Psychologists agree that it is impossible to deeply and deeply love another person if you do not love yourself.

In conclusion, I would like to emphasize that there is nothing special about a dream girl. She's not the prettiest, the smartest, or the most successful. She simply takes care of herself, takes care of herself, respects and loves herself.

Thank you for reading this article to the end.

Hello, my name is Yaroslav Samoilov. I am an expert in the psychology of relationships and over the years of practice I have helped more than 10,000 girls meet worthy soul mates, build harmonious relationships and return love and understanding to families that were on the verge of divorce.

More than anything, I am inspired by the happy eyes of students who meet the people of their dreams and enjoy a truly vibrant life.

My goal is to show women a way to develop relationships that will help them create a synergy of success and happiness!

What to do if the man left?

1. Understand the root causes. Why did this situation happen to you? You may need a guide - a psychologist who will help you find the root of the problem.

Even if this relationship cannot be revived, you will not make similar mistakes in the future.

If your parental attitudes are to blame (for example, “me” or a victim complex), only a specialist will help you work through them.

If the problem is in your character or habits, you can smooth out the rough edges yourself. Get to the root cause. Remember his reproaches and complaints - this is the key to understanding the problem. If a man often told you:

• You stopped taking care of yourself.
• You don't need me. You have a job.
• You are not listening to me.
• You don’t care about me and so on – these are his pains.

Resentments accumulated and an explosion occurred - leaving the relationship.

2. Work on yourself. It is very important not to humiliate yourself, not to beg him to stay, not to manipulate the children.

In the eyes of a man, you should appear to be a calm and unbroken woman. And at this time, work through your pain, grievances and emotions.

Until you can let go of the situation and communicate with your ex without screaming, hysterics and accusations. On average, this takes a year. To survive the pain of loss.

Don't focus only on the bad. There were probably some good moments in your past together.

To forgive a man, do a simple practice. Every morning, imagine his image to the smallest detail and say “I am grateful to you for...” For the years together, for your protection, for being a support for me, for our children, and so on.

And then just say “I forgive you” and let the image melt away. Each time it will become easier for you to say these words and let go of negative emotions.

3. Treat yourself. If you accidentally cross paths in a company or on the street, a man should see not a woman with a dull look, but an energetic and confident lady. Consider his departure not as the collapse of family life, but as the beginning of something new.

• You have more time for yourself. Pamper yourself with spa treatments, a relaxing massage, a new haircut - tactile sensations help fight stress.
• Playing sports is a great way to avoid depression and release energy.
• Change your wardrobe, haircut, makeup - you will feel renewed.
• Develop yourself. Attend trainings, seminars, read, find an interesting hobby. You will understand that life has not lost its color with his departure.
• Change your surroundings: go on a trip, live in another city for a couple of weeks - you really need new experiences.

4. Temporarily minimize communication with a man. Don’t bother him with calls and messages, don’t track updates on social network pages.

Focus on your business, don't get hung up. If a man has feelings for you and is already thinking about returning, he will find a way to contact you.

5. To forgive or not to forgive? Most prodigal husbands make an attempt to return to the family. And it’s up to you whether to give him this opportunity. You are well aware that leaving is also a betrayal.

After all, it often happens that a woman turns the departure (betrayal) of her loved one into a means of manipulation. “Yes, I forgave you for being so bad, I accepted you, but you don’t want to buy me new boots.”

Ask yourself the question “Will I be happy if he comes back?” After all, it often happens that a woman herself does not notice how her feelings for her ex-partner have disappeared.

And she clings to the thought of his return like that, out of habit. So maybe you don’t need to return the person you no longer love at all?

6. Discussion. Suppose he repented, came and asked to be given a second chance. It is very important not to step on the same rake again.

Sit down and have an honest conversation about what you expect from this relationship? How do you see them? Only if your desires, attitudes and goals coincide can the relationship be “repaired”.

If none of you are ready to change and work on yourself, what’s the point of torturing yourself and your partner again?

You must clearly understand what he was missing in the relationship (since he left) and convey to your partner what you are looking for in a couple. Frankness, trust, willingness to work - these are the three pillars on which everything rests.

Why did my beloved husband leave the family?

Lack of sex

So, the first reason a man leaves the family is a simple lack of sex. “Headache”, “tired”, “not in the mood” - sound familiar? It will pass a couple of times, and then the man will instinctively look for another partner, and if he likes everything about her, he can easily leave soon. This also includes routine in sexual relationships. And by the way, it’s a woman’s job to keep this fire going! Games, flirting, erotic lingerie, romantic evenings in marriage are not cancelled! Cover all sexual fantasies of each other, otherwise your partner will cover them on the side. How to find out what he dreams about in bed? Ask!

Woman “turns on mommy”

This has already been “written and rewritten”, and still women do it. Not only do they not “let go” of adult children, everyone is fussing, not allowing the children to develop independently, but also the husband too! A man, believe me, can do everything on his own: wash his socks, clean the house, cook food, and look after the children. It is this “mommy syndrome” that pushes a man to leave in order to realize himself as a man in the family, and not to be a “doormat” under the wing of a super-caring wife. I know men who can only cook scrambled eggs on their own and don’t know how to turn on the washing machine, and this at the age of 80! Nightmare! And subconsciously they don’t sleep with such a “mother”; a man will avoid sexual relations with such a woman.

We tried to change it for ourselves

We get married in the hope that we can make him what we want. Will not work. A man is a person, with his own principles, habits and beliefs. And the older a man is, the more conservative he is. Choose what you like and what suits you. You don’t go to the store for boots, but buy felt boots? When you change a man, he will freak out, get angry, and this will affect the relationship, incl. and sexy. This is from the series: I want the fish to become a cat, and immediately!

Insults flow like a river

If a woman humiliates and insults a man (even if he deserves it), especially in public. A man will not stay long with such a woman.

I stopped looking after myself

Also, one of the reasons why a husband leaves is that a woman is not well-groomed, including in everyday life. In fact, it is very important for a man to see a well-groomed, beautiful, attractive, sexy, cheerful woman at home (dirty robes, torn clothes, unwashed hair, etc. do not add beauty). Why, if a woman is a model (on the catwalk or fashion model) and a man knows about it, does he try to win her without often thinking about what her character is, her state of health, etc.? Because this is recognized beauty, and because... a man loves to achieve and conquer - that’s the object. A man sees first of all the picture, the beauty, and nothing can be done about it, you have to live up to it.

A man in a skirt, not a woman

It's no longer a secret that men like feminine women (just as women like masculine men). If a woman is used to deciding everything herself, “putting pressure” on a man, commanding, then he turns into a weak-willed creature and gets used to it. For him now his wife is like a rival. She's a man! What kind of passion is there already? In another case, if he does not want to obey commands, he quickly leaves for another.

Bad character

In the flower-candy stage of a relationship, each party shows its best qualities. When the marriage has already been formalized, they forget about this and open up “to the fullest”! Disappointment sets in: I took the wrong one, married the wrong one... If a man, for example, does not smoke, and a woman really likes smoking and is not going to quit, this can cause a divorce, although everything is fine in all other areas. This case is from my practice: 16 years of marriage with really good relationships and sex, but the woman could not sacrifice this smoking habit, and the man simply hated and could not stand cigarette smoke. The marriage broke up only for this seemingly insignificant reason. This includes alcohol abuse, not to mention drugs, even soft ones.

Mismatch of life principles and priorities

There are beliefs that are easy to change, but there are life principles that usually remain with a person for the rest of his life. Beliefs: for example, drinking 2 liters of water a day is stupid. After attending any training or going to a normal doctor, the belief changes in one minute and the person is already a supporter of drinking water. Principle: for example, I will never steal someone else’s thing, I do not use drugs under any pretext, I constantly learn new things and improve, I eat only food that strengthens and supports my body (this is the principle of health), I do not allow myself to humiliate, etc. If there are global discrepancies in principles, the marriage will definitely fall apart.

Relationships with relatives

There are people for whom relatives play a very important role in their lives. Example: eastern countries. If your man is from this category, and you can’t stand his relatives, you’ll have to come to terms with it, just limit your time communicating with them. Quarrels with his relatives can also lead to a cooling of feelings.