Yes, in general, you can agree with the previous speakers, but all arguments become powerless if you fall in love with a person (yes, here any spiritualized philological maiden, overcoming her ego, will sigh for the gopnik from heaven, well, anything can happen). Speaking about myself, I am very tolerant towards guys, but there are a couple of main things with which communication will not go further: 1. When a guy doesn’t care about you, what you say, and when he looks over your head ( especially at the 1st meeting) - this is where I instantly lose interest in him. 2. When he's weird. Kind of weird. I don’t know how to explain, but I’ve come across guys like this more than once, and it really infuriates me, because I’m quite simple and it’s more pleasant and interesting for me to communicate with simple, adequate guys. Yes, we all have our problems, but there are some strange ones. At the same time, they actively communicate with girls, in some ways they are even bolder and more active than ordinary guys, but they are strange. *IMHO*
And also, girls, admit it, you wouldn’t date nerds. No, now we’re not talking about fashionable tech geeks like Sheldon, Howard, etc. in plaid shirts and hipster glasses, but about pimply nerds with unfashionable glasses and wearing suits (usually hanging on them). Yeah, we don’t even look at such people, but they are smart, probably with a rich inner world. Still, we love the motto “Smart is new sexy.”
And now it’s fashionable to talk about “stereotypical thinking of modern society”, “social pressure”, etc. Girls especially love it, who are not like everyone else. Fashionable ones there. Readers. Mainly Huxley and Ourella. I’ll say it again that if you fall in love with the gopnik Vasya from the district, you’ll forget about your criteria in a moment. Well, the guy doesn’t know any artists other than Shishkin? So, tell me. If he's interested in you, of course. Once I was walking with one guy, I didn’t really like him, but he listened with such interest (even asked me to tell him) my stories about history, the history of houses, about architectural styles, not embarrassed by the fact that he didn’t know what exactly I was very pleased)
Ok, I also wanted to say something about the guys. Here some confidently asserted that any woman is looking for a man with money. NO GUYS, NO, SERIOUSLY. Now, in my 20s, the highest bell tower in the world doesn’t give a damn how much money a guy has. I don’t ask you to pay for yourself at the cinema/cafe/for shavuha, etc., it even causes awkwardness when they pay for you (usually I try to pay for myself), because the guy (especially if he’s my age) is in something like this same financial situation as me. In addition, it is difficult to argue with the fact that when they pay for you, somewhere in the subconscious there is immediately a feeling that you have to repay him with something (well, we understand what).
In general, what is most important is that the person, as they say, belongs to him. Soul mate. Then you’ll be ready to move mountains for him ^^
Friend
+
Relationships based on passion alone cannot last forever. It’s another thing when you have a person next to you who always understands perfectly, supports you in difficult situations, rejoices at your victories and can run to the store for pads without any problems.
—
Instead of “bunny” or “cat”, he calls you “dude”, and his friends are not shy in your presence to discuss what a fool this Lucy is with a size 5 breast. Additionally, if your romantic relationship doesn't work out, your friendship could end.
Our verdict:
The game is definitely worth the candle! If you want to be loved not for your long legs, but for your deep inner peace, friendship will be an excellent foundation for a strong relationship.
Boss
+
Secret dates during lunch breaks, languid glances during meetings and sex in the workplace - you definitely won’t have time to get bored. Besides, a man with power (even over a modest department of 10 people) is so sexy!
—
Rumors about your affair will spread throughout the office in a matter of days, and you will be forced to constantly catch the ambiguous glances of your colleagues. In addition, if someone from higher management finds out about the affair, this may threaten dismissal.
Our verdict:
Do you value your career? Then you shouldn’t start a relationship in the office. Well, if you are sure that this is true love, it makes sense to transfer to another department or even go to another company, so as not to mix work with personal life.
Your ex
+
People and circumstances change. You can learn from your past mistakes and start over. In addition, he remembers what you like in bed - good sex is 100% guaranteed!
—
If you broke up due to fundamentally different views on life, incompatibility of characters, bad habits, betrayals - most likely, these reasons will “pop up” again on the horizon of your relationship.
Our verdict:
The clear decision is yours. The main thing is not to remember past grievances and start everything literally “from scratch.”
Grown man
+
What difference does it make how old your loved one is if he is young at heart? Older men are more courageous, stable, experienced, reliable and ready for serious relationships.
—
The main question is whether your “adult” man wants this most serious relationship. If your middle-aged man has already been married, he may be one of the convinced single bachelors who are looking for entertainment, but not stability.
Our verdict:
The main thing is to make sure in time that you want the same thing. If both you and he are committed to a serious relationship, age will definitely not be a hindrance for you. But if he is going through a midlife crisis and wants to “rejuvenate” at the expense of his young mistress, this is not the hero of your novel.
Your friend's ex-boyfriend
+
Thanks to your friend, his name is constantly on your lips. You have a million common topics of conversation, and you've heard a lot about how good he is in bed.
—
Your friend won't forgive you.
And who will you go to complain to when he “switches on” to the next girl in your company? Our verdict:
No, no and no again! Upon closer examination, the “forbidden fruit” turns out to be not so sweet. And it will be very difficult to regain your friend’s trust.
You should think in advance about which person you should not date and which you can. If all people look for a soul mate, paying attention to certain rules, then the rate of divorces and separations will noticeably decrease. For a relationship to be strong and happy, a girl must choose a guy who suits her by name, horoscope and interests.
Why do people meet?
Any relationship requires a lot of work and effort; for its full development, the contribution of two people is necessary. Lovers must be able to understand, respect and give in to each other. Often such a connection brings pain and suffering, but if everything is so bad, then why can’t a person live peacefully alone, why does he rush around again and again in search of a soul mate?
Impossible to give correct answer
, since all people start dating for different reasons, we can highlight
several of the most popular ones
:
| Why do girls meet? | Why do guys meet? |
| A girl always wants attention, affection, care. She just needs to always have a strong shoulder next to her that can stand up and do the hard work. | It’s hard for a guy to live alone, he needs female care, thanks to which he will receive delicious dinners, clean, ironed things and comfort in the house. |
| Women can choose a man because of benefits. For example, in order not to work and not think about your financial condition, or vice versa, to profitably build your own career. | A man cannot exist for a long time without sex. By choosing a girl, he ensures a constant sex life. |
A person is a living creature that is not capable of living alone. For a full existence and development, he needs a soul mate and a family. Perhaps prolongation of the family line and the creation of a new unit of society
- this is the main reason why people meet.
What should you do at the beginning of a relationship to strengthen it?
When meeting people, they try to show their best side. This is not hypocrisy, but a simple and logical solution. When starting an affair, a man and a woman are drawn to positive emotions. The more pleasant the start of the relationship, the greater the likelihood of its successful continuation.
In the first stages, a girl needs to be an optimist - smile often, be in a good mood, and, if possible, share sincere positivity with her partner.
When communicating, do not forget to watch your facial expressions and gestures. A gloomy facial expression and closed postures are repulsive factors that can block even strong sympathy. The man will think that he is unpleasant to you and will leave so as not to intrude. To achieve the opposite effect, smile, look your interlocutor in the eyes and try to show that you enjoy the conversation.
Correct behavior at the beginning of a relationship
Practical guidance from a children's fairy tale
Let's remember Scheherazade - a smart and beautiful girl who took on a dangerous mission. One king, bitterly experiencing his wife’s betrayal, began to hate all women. He spent every night with a new concubine, and in the morning he ordered her execution. Scheherazade volunteered to go to the royal chambers, hoping to put an end to the cruel tradition. Being a talented storyteller, she captured the man's attention with a captivating story.
By morning she had come to the end, promising to tell it the next night. The king wanted to hear the continuation, and he postponed the execution to the next day. But after the first story, the second, no less interesting, began. It also ended in the morning at the most intriguing place.
The oriental beauty dynamized her listener for a thousand nights. And when the supply of fairy tales dried up, the king was head over heels in love with her and no longer thought about any execution.
Scheherazade is a fictional character. However, her wisdom applies well in real life. A girl should be interesting not only in bed, but also in the intellectual aspect. At the beginning of a relationship, it is especially important to devote time to mental self-development. Read books, stay up to date with news and current topics, attend unusual events.
A man should be interested in talking to you
Of course, there is no point in going too far and being clever. It is also undesirable to overwhelm your new lover with your biography; things will come to that, but later. At first, it is better to listen to the guy more and have a conversation on neutral topics.
Be interesting to the guy
How to check name compatibility?
It is quite easy to figure out whether the names fit together. There is a specific number for each letter
, it is from them that you can predict what kind of relationship will turn out.
Below is the name compatibility table:
| Number | Characteristic letter for a number |
To determine name compatibility, you need to follow several steps:
- You need to write two names (male and female) on a piece of paper, assign each letter its own code number;
- All numbers of each name must be added;
- The resulting number is responsible for the character of the partner. If the sum is a two-digit number, then you need to add it together until you get one sign.
Once two numbers are obtained, you can check if the names are compatible
.
How to respond to different types of guys?
The man who offers to date can be anyone - a handsome guy you like, an ex-boyfriend who wants to return the relationship, an acquaintance to whom you are indifferent. Below I will tell you how to deal with each of them.
- His feelings and yours are mutual. In this case, wait until the man makes himself known again. There is no need to take the initiative on your own; this will scare away the young man and make the process of winning your heart less interesting. The game of cat and mouse with a man, which we already talked about today, will be appropriate and will spur his desire to win your heart.
- The ex-man suggested starting the relationship again. What was the reason for your separation? If these were misunderstandings, the reasons for which he rethought, then give the relationship a second chance. But if your ex-boyfriend or husband raised his hand to you, allowed himself insults, or cheated on you, then it is better to refuse him.
- A guy you're not interested in. Let's say you're already married or in love with another man, or maybe he's just not your type. Refuse tactfully, or invite the guy to remain friends if the situation allows it.
- A man with whom you are undecided. To get started, read the article “Love or sympathy”, and having found out the nature of your feelings, act as suggested in the points above.
Name compatibility results for relationship building
The first digit is responsible for the male name
, second
for women's
.
Digit 1
- The two units provide a fairly complex relationship. Both people are not used to giving in and will consider themselves the head of the family. To get a good relationship you need to learn to give in;
- One goes well with two, four, six, seven and nine. Such partners will always find common topics for conversation and learn to understand each other, which will allow them to create a strong family;
- The most stormy and passionate relationship will be ensured by a combination of one with three or seven. Such a relationship will be like a volcanic eruption;
- One is absolutely incompatible with eight; such a relationship will bring suffering to both partners.
Digit 2
- Constant conflicts will be ensured if the deuce links its fate with the deuce, five or seven;
- A two will find absolute harmony with a three, six or eight;
- The relationship between a two and an eight can be called ideal, since both partners will complement each other;
- Two and nine are a union of two opposites; such a couple cannot have a common future.
Digit 3
- Two triplets can only be combined when they do not violate each other's freedom;
- The number four does not accept flattery and deception; only sincere and trusting feelings with the number three will ensure a productive relationship;
- Complete harmony of relationships will occur if a three connects their life with a five, six or nine;
- Poor, but nevertheless possible, compatibility between threes and sevens and eights.
Digit 4
- Two fours are a boring and monotonous union that will not last long;
- If a four associates itself with a five or seven, then it will lack understanding and support;
- The compatibility of the four with the six and nine is also quite low;
- Only the union of four and eight
will be harmonious.
Number 5
- Five in combination with five, six and nine is an excellent option for creating long-term relationships and family;
- A five and a seven will have a passionate relationship;
- The ambitions of the Eight will always interfere with the Five, which will not allow them to create long-term relationships.
Number 6
- Sixes and sixes are more friends than partners;
- Six with seven and nine will feel like one;
- A six and an eight will always complement each other, which will create a strong bond.
Number 7
- Seven and seven will be combined with each other only when there are common interests between them;
- Seven and eight are two leaders who will find it difficult to give in to each other;
- Seven and nine are one of the most successful combinations.
Number 8
- Two eights are a complex, equal union that will bring a lot of suffering;
- Eight and nine are two opposites that are constantly attracted to each other.
Number 9
A nine and a nine can have a good relationship if they learn to understand each other.
Where is the best place not to meet?
There are many places that favor acquaintances and in every possible way facilitate the connection of lonely hearts. But experts are ready to name those places where, on the contrary, you should not make acquaintances for a serious relationship. For example:
- dating sites – there is so much competition here that it’s not worth wasting time on dating;
- night club – club girls are most often in search of short-term affairs or sponsors;
- bar - hardly anyone would call this place a source of decent girls who are ready for a family and children.
Expert opinion
Elena Druzhnikova
Sexologist. Family relations expert. Family psychologist.
The street is considered the most difficult place to meet, as girls think stereotypically, believing that meeting the first person you meet on the street is bad manners and a sign of indecency. In fact, practice shows the opposite; it is in the crowd or on the way to work or school that young people meet their fate.
Who is strictly forbidden to date?
Regardless of whether they are compatible or not, there is a whole list of what kind of person you should definitely not date:
- The best friend will always come to the rescue, help out and lend his shoulder. Creating relationships will only spoil this warm connection;
- Dates with your boss are good until the first quarrel. Such love relationships can harm your career;
- It is best to maintain only friendly relations with your friend's boyfriend. Having built love with him, you can lose your faithful comrade-in-arms forever.
To create strong, happy and long-lasting relationships, you need to plan right away who you can build them with.
Video: Who should you not date?
In this instructive video, psychologist Zakhar Sheremetyev will tell you which guys you shouldn’t date and why some people are not psychologically compatible:
Psychologists note that there are a number of qualities and personal characteristics that can make relationships more harmonious or, on the contrary, destroy them. Here we are not talking about looking for a rich and romantic guy or a luxurious, passionate girl who loves football. We will present 10 characteristics that can make a person an ideal partner for a relationship. If you find them in your partner, then you have chosen the right candidate who will make you happy.
It seems you forgot something3
If you begin to notice that after his presence, practically nothing changes in your home, well, except for the position of the toilet seat, and he never forgets his things, then there is reason to think. One of the possible options for checking in this case is to leave some of your things in his apartment if he lets you in.
And if in this case, every time he tries to immediately return the forgotten item, then this will be another signal that he has no plans for a relationship. The fact is that he doesn’t want to leave his things with the woman, because he doesn’t know if this is their last meeting.
You need to date someone who can control their impulses
In other words, it is a person’s ability to do an unpleasant thing instead of a pleasant one in order to ultimately achieve some advantage. Thus, healthy relationships involve the need to regularly face not-so-pleasant moments. So, you may be hurt, embarrassed, have to listen to your partner if you want to play a computer game, do boring errands, etc. However, this must be done so that your other half is happy and your relationship is harmonious.
Universal gift4
Everyone is pleased to receive gifts, and receiving gifts that you have long dreamed of is doubly pleasant. But if a man is not interested in a serious relationship, then all the gifts he gives are not at all original. An ordinary bouquet of flowers, a box of chocolate, obscure tubes of facial ointment, in general, any gift that is suitable for absolutely any female. That is, if he doesn't give gifts based on what you like, doesn't personalize them, doesn't wrap up with the purchase, all these are signs that it's time to have a serious conversation.
Date someone who makes you feel emotionally safe
Emotional security is very important because it allows you to feel free and relaxed around your loved one. If your partner criticizes, blames you, is condescending, or is constantly irritated, then this will not lead to anything good. In this case, you will not see emotional security. Therefore, look for a person who will always be open to hear from you even what he does not like, and who treats you with understanding and takes into account your requests and desires.
Types of bad men
Incorrigible bachelor
At the beginning of the novel he will be wonderful. You will be surrounded by attention and care, all your whims will be listened to and fulfilled. And then he will simply disappear. And this will happen when your relationship is about to move to a new level. And the reason is that this type of man is not looking for a permanent relationship. He is comfortable and calm not being attached to anyone. This is a man you can't build a relationship with .
Such a partner is only suitable for you if you do not want a long-term relationship, but want a bright, light romance.
Professional heartthrob
You can call him a collector. Men of this type hunt for every skirt. It seems that their hobby is collecting relationships with girls. At the same time, it is very easy to fall into his “clutches”, because he knows how to present himself in the most pleasant light, bombarding the girl with beautiful phrases and spectacular antics. But such unreliable men immediately give up if the girl does not succumb to their charms. They just go pick their next victim.
Narcissus
A man who will make you go crazy with his beauty. After all, he very carefully monitors his appearance, as well as his inner world. But you will soon realize that his attention is focused only on himself, and not on you. He may forget about your personal holiday, but he will never forget about his own. If he gets sick, then be prepared to surround him with attention and care at every moment of his illness. However, if you get sick, you won’t receive such care, because he will be afraid of getting infected. Simply put, he knows how to love himself, but not others.
Tyrant
This type of man cannot always be identified at the very beginning of your communication. After all, he shows what seems to be the most important features of an ideal man: care, affection, attention to your affairs. But after a while you will feel like you are in prison. It contains a lot of signs of unreliable men. He completely takes control of your entire life, puts strict boundaries even where there should be no boundaries at all. With him, you will not be able to be an independent person; you will only be a puppet in the hands of a despot.
Whiner
Such a man will find something bad in everything, and will definitely share this information with you. He would only suffer, that life is a complete failure, and no one understands or supports his poor little one. You may feel like you are just a pillow for his tears and suffering. If you don’t need an eternally suffering partner, then run away from him wherever you look.
Busy
In other words, he is married (or in a relationship). For some, this is not a reason to deny themselves a connection with him. After all, he can get a divorce at any moment, you are so wonderful, and better than his current companion. But don't create empty illusions. Such romances often lead nowhere, although they can last for years.
All the men on this list are not the best candidates for life partners. But let's look at another list that gives more specific examples of which men you shouldn't mess with.
Which guys are not recommended to build relationships with?
