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More than half of modern marriages face periods of crisis, difficulties in relationships, and infidelity. The pace of our life is constantly increasing, sometimes we simply do not have time to adapt to it, develop the necessary speed in order to jump on the bandwagon of fate in time. Today a woman can be sure that she has the happiest, harmonious and strong marriage in the world, indestructible and eternal, but tomorrow it turns out that her beloved husband has left for his mistress without even voicing the reason for his action.
At such moments, many women wonder why this happened, whether the traitor will come to his senses, how long it takes to realize such a vile and treacherous act. Of course, there is no thorough and universal answer that would be equally true for everyone. Psychology provides some explanations that would be worth studying. So what to do if the husband left for his mistress, how quickly will he understand that family is more valuable and will this happen at all? We will try to give answers to these and other questions from the point of view of specialists and ordinary people.
Who abandoned whom?i
A guy will rarely want to return to the one he himself, on his own initiative, decided to leave. If he no, no, and even comes to see her, or even if they started dating again, perhaps it was the girl who initiated the separation.
The man simply did not stop loving her, thinking about her even in moments spent with his new passion. And as soon as his ex beckoned him to her, he immediately went.
How do such stories usually end? In most cases, nothing good. The woman will again keep the gentleman next to her until she gets tired of him again. And perhaps this time he will go again to the one from whom he only recently left. Why not? Don’t look for another girl when the previous one is ready to accept!
Secrets of male psychology
Guys deliberately enter into serious relationships. Fleeting romances of a day/two/week are not of much importance to them. They clearly understand what kind of partner is needed according to today’s emotional background and life circumstances. The dissimilarity of male and female thinking gives rise to many conflicts. If the weaker half gives priority to feelings, experiences and words, guys prefer to act rather than conquer and convince with verbal arguments.
Often, the initiators of breaking up long-term serious relationships are girls who find it emotionally easier to cope with the current situation. It is not common for men to notice details, trifles, analyze the behavior, and mood swings of their beloved halves.
Have common children2
Why does a man return after separation to the wife he left behind? If they have children together, then there is nothing strange about it. Even though he is madly in love with his new girlfriend, he left his ex-wife because the feeling has long cooled down, he will continue to communicate with his child.
The children will ask their father to stay every time, and, at one fine moment, he will give in to them and return to the family nest.
How do such stories end? If a man left his wife because he met another woman, the family will most likely become even stronger. Be that as it may, he can also experience warm feelings for his wife, and common children will only strengthen them. If the husband left because of constant scandals with his missus, then one day the children will not be able to keep him. Having returned once, he will again fall under the gun of his wife, and this will bother him again and again.
Top 5 common mistakes women make after a breakup
Of course, each life situation is individual and worthy of careful study. But still, there are some rules that will help not to mess things up and save the relationship. The first thing I recommend to all women is to behave with dignity, not to panic and not to make hasty decisions. Hasty actions almost always make the situation worse.
What you definitely shouldn't do:
- Reproach a man, call him to his conscience, call him daily or send messages on social networks. This will lead to your lover hiding from you, blacklisting your number and blocking access to their accounts.
- Set up supposedly random meetings on the street, stalk, communicate with the man’s relatives and friends, begging them to help. This behavior will further alienate you from each other.
- Threaten with suicide, violence, revenge. This will create an opinion of you as an inadequate person and will strengthen the correctness of his decision. Over time, resentment and emotions will go away, but the residue from impulsive actions and unworthy behavior will remain.
- Arrange surveillance of the man himself and his new partner. Involve male acquaintances and work colleagues in this unworthy activity.
- Cherish your misfortune, constantly beat yourself up, remembering traumatic events. This can block your personal life and your attractiveness.
And you shouldn’t isolate yourself and live with past grievances. “Canned” pain is a difficult test not only for the psyche, but also for the entire energy system. This negativity will destroy you from the inside and attract all kinds of troubles from the outside. In such an atmosphere you will not be able to act effectively.
Is the help of a magician needed in such a situation? Of course, professional help from an experienced shaman will be useful and effective in any situation. Contact us and you will receive professional help. I will not use violent methods to create emotional attachment, but I will help restore energy losses and create favorable conditions to return true reciprocity and former feelings. If there is even the most minimal chance of restoring the relationship, it will be realized, I will do everything to make this happen as soon as possible.
Emotional pressure3
There are girls who can bring back even the dead from the grave with their tears. They begin to put moral pressure on the guy. They may say that they can’t live without him, that it would be better to die, and flood their phone, social networks, the ex-boyfriend’s relatives, even his best friends with tears.
Few men can resist a woman’s sadness, and even the strongest begin to feel like moral monsters who treated their once beloved lady so badly. And this feeling of guilt becomes the reason for returning to the arms of the unloved, for her joy, for her own bad mood.
Such stories usually don't end well. The guy will suffer next to someone he is not interested in, but he is afraid that she might do something to herself. At some point, the woman herself will understand that strong family relationships cannot be built on pity alone. No matter how bad it may be after separation, you need to be able to survive it, maintain your self-esteem, and understand that you deserve the best, the one who will truly love you.
GuruTest
Sooner or later, almost any person may have doubts about the correctness of their choice of a spouse. To such a stumbler, it seems that his wife is no longer the beautiful young girl who once made his head spin. Now this tired and most often irritated woman no longer evokes the same emotions, she is one of many. And when another woman appears on the horizon, still unfamiliar and therefore mysterious and incomprehensible, not everyone can resist. The relationship with his mistress develops quickly, and now she is already taking the man away from the family.
It would seem that history could put an end to this, but this is not so. Time passes, and the traitor is almost on his knees, begging to be taken back. Why did his mistresses suddenly stop satisfying him? What draws you back to your ex-wife again?
Feeling nostalgic
Even if feelings for his wife have long passed, a man associates many different memories with her. While his mistress, for example, is frying pancakes, he will have time to think that his wife made them completely differently. While his mistress is blow-drying her hair, he can remember that his wife liked to wait until her hair dried on its own. New does not always mean better, so any male representative can quickly miss such familiar and familiar actions. There were traditions in the family that do not exist now, and a lot of time will pass before new ones appear, with a new family.
Nostalgia is a strong feeling. And therefore, over time, the man decides to return to an atmosphere that is, albeit boring, but so familiar and dear to him, where he has already managed to create his own comfort zone. A new relationship requires a lot of effort, and not everyone is ready to spend it.
The wife “bloomed”
Most likely, the breakup of the relationship greatly upset the ex-wife, but a little time passed and she realized that life does not end with a divorce. She starts going on dates again, flirting, and suddenly realizes something she didn’t have time for in her marriage: she’s still beautiful enough to attract other people’s glances and attention. And she blossoms, buys herself new clothes, changes her hairstyle. She may even find a new man with whom she will feel happy.
All these changes will not pass by the attention of the ex-husband. And he may begin to be jealous of his ex-wife for her new lifestyle. Suddenly it turns out that all these years he lived with a woman who is no worse, and in many ways better than his mistress, but he could not see it. Moreover, it is unpleasant and offensive to realize that his wife did not preen herself so much for his sake, which means that he simply did not deserve it. This is where the desire to go back and try everything all over again arises.
Late Realization
People sometimes tend to pretend they are not who they really are, so a man who left for his mistress may be in for an unpleasant surprise. Perhaps she didn’t say anything about her income, about her habits and hobbies, or even about her real age. Or maybe she just forgot to mention that her mother spends the night with her every weekend, and this tradition will not change with the appearance of a man. A new relationship, if you dive deeper into it, can turn out to be a real nightmare. And in this case, the man already remembers with longing how wonderful and calm life with his wife was. There is no point in enduring all the revealed shortcomings of your mistress; it’s time to think about escaping. And where better to escape than home?
If your mistress took your spouse away, do not be sad - most likely, he will try to return in the near future. However, you should think carefully before you decide to forgive him. It will be impossible to return to the old relationship, and you will constantly be waiting for a new betrayal. Meanwhile, life constantly presents new opportunities. Do not forget about this when you are distracted by a situation that is bitter for you.
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18.03.2019 01:09
One Hundred Years of Solitude4
The couple broke up, the guy had already gone out with another girl, but something didn’t work out in the relationship. He was alone for a while, and then decided to visit his ex-girlfriend. Why does a man return after breaking up to a girl with whom he broke up a long time ago? Perhaps the state of loneliness has become strained by him, and he wants a serious relationship.
But in such situations, there is a huge probability that the matter will end in a wedding and a happy family future for the couple. During the separation, he realized that there was no one better than the one to whom he decided to return, and that only she was ready to endure all his “oversights.”
Your husband left for his mistress - what would you do? Reviews from women from forums
Sveta, 30 years old: In such a situation, the main thing is not to give up and not get depressed. Remember, you are young and you can overcome anything. Set yourself specific life goals and gradually achieve them.
Natalya Petrovna, 45 years old: My husband left me after 20 years of married life. Of course, at first I became very depressed. But then she pulled herself together and began to build a new life. After all, I have children who need me. You won’t believe it, but even at such a respectable age, I met a new love, and again I felt like an 18-year-old girl.
Irina, 25 years old: My husband left me when our daughter was half a year old. The first few years of my life I devoted exclusively to the baby. Thanks to my parents and friends for helping. And then I entered college as a correspondence student, went to work and began to arrange my personal life. Girls, believe me, there is nothing unattainable in this life, the main thing is to set your priorities correctly, not give up and move forward.
Mila, 35 years old: Maybe many will condemn me for my action. But when my husband left me with a five-year-old son in his arms, I gave him the child with the words “You have arranged your personal life, now I need to take care of mine.” His mistress left him a month later, she didn’t want to babysit someone else’s child. And he returned to the family. Now we live happily, and the faithful does not walk to the left.
Everything is learned by comparison5
It happens that a guy left his girlfriend because of some of her shortcomings. But why does a man return to her again after breaking up, since he already realized once that he cannot put up with any of her character traits? Yes, everything is simple here. Many such guys, after leaving their girlfriend, meet someone with whom everything is much worse, and everything that happened before no longer seems so terrible.
For example, in the first friend, the man was irritated by her desire for cleanliness; she forced him to neatly lay out things and wash the dishes after himself. And then he meets someone for whom cleanliness is not the main thing. It seems to be easy with her, but everything will stop the moment you encounter a horde of cockroaches in the kitchen, or traces of lipstick on a “clean” glass. It’s better to vacuum twice every day than to live in unsanitary conditions!
Will the reunion end well? Most likely no. The guy will continue to run from one to the other until he meets the “golden mean”.
Or maybe he just loves her?6
There are such relationships when it is impossible to live with each other, but without each other everything is impossible. The couple once again had a row and decided to break off the relationship. He finds a girl with whom he is calm, but at one point she discovers the absence of his things in the closet. Why does a man return after breaking up to the one with whom he is like on a volcano? He just loves her, and very much.
How long will their relationship last? It's hard to say. If they don’t compromise and continue to argue, they will break up forever.
If a guy left you for an ex-girlfriend or wife, you don’t need to keep him or try to get him back. At some point he may return, just think about it, do you need it?
How to behave when a man returns to his wife
“Everything that doesn’t kill us makes us stronger,” this is how the classics would answer. But in a situation when a man leaves and emotions run high, it’s difficult to remain reasonable, but possible. It would be a mistake to chase after a man who has left and start attacking him with calls and messages.
A man who leaves always makes room for change to something new. Probably now is the time for the main person in your life. Mistakes made bring with them not only disappointments, but also invaluable experience. The Universe always leads a person along its own path. Close the door to the past and to your heart behind the departed man, and open it to new love.
You can find out what the departed man feels for you, what he is ready for for you, and find out what actions to take next by making the “Fortune telling on the feelings of your loved one on gypsy cards” layout.
