Girls are very unpredictable creatures. In addition, they really like to manipulate men, especially through “grievances.” If a girl is offended by you, remains silent and ignores you, then now you will understand how to act.
Before reacting in any way to a girl’s offense, try to look at the situation as objectively as possible in order to find out what really happened. Who is to blame and for what reason is your loved one offended?
Find out the reason for silence
The exact reason for not responding to messages is very important, because then you can understand what to write to her next. Here are the main options:
- It is important to remember that women, like men, can be busy. It is possible that she is not responding because she has something going on. It could be work, a family event, she could ignore a man for other reasons that are not very pleasant for her. She may be texting someone else, not enjoying texting the ignored man, or not valuing him enough to make him a priority. She may think of a man as a friend.
- Perhaps the man's message was lost among the dozens of messages she received that day.
- Or she could easily have dropped the phone in the toilet.
- I found myself out of range of a cell phone signal and so on.
What would Freud say about this?
According to the theories of Sigmund Freud, all people have an innate predisposition to bisexuality. And homosexual behavior is the result of the manifestation of this predisposition under specific life circumstances. Normally, human development occurs along the heterosexual path, but in some cases it can stop at the stage of immaturity, and this, according to the psychiatrist, gives rise to homosexuality.
But attraction to members of the same sex often arises already in adulthood, manifesting itself as a result of subconscious fears and complexes. Freud also believed that the causes of female homosexuality, as well as male homosexuality, should be sought in childhood. The girl could have had a cruel father or brother, for whom she harbored hostility, which later spread to the image of men in general.
In psychology, it is generally accepted that it is quite natural for all women to experience such feelings, but not everyone can express them. If a girl has fallen in love with a girl, she just needs to calm down and figure herself out.
Freud wrote little on this topic, so it is impossible to present his views in monosyllabic terms. But what is certain is that he recognized homosexuality as a consequence of developmental delay, and not as a mental disorder or disease, which was radically at odds with the opinion of doctors of the time. Freud called the reason for the attraction of women or men to persons of the same sex the influence of life conditions on the development of a person’s psychosexual orientation.
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How to forget your first love: effective methods and recommendations from psychologists
Don't panic2
When a man has feelings for a girl, he goes a little crazy and may have all sorts of anxieties. A man doesn’t know what to do if a girl ignores him. If she is really busy and the person being ignored has not received enough communication from her, then you should take a few deep breaths and wait for her response. You can't let anxiety take over if it has a real justification and it only took a small amount of time.
Lead message4
As soon as it becomes clear that she will not call back, you need to send a message. The hook text could be a meme, a funny story with both of them, a shared photo. Anything that says, “I saw this and thought about you.” The golden rule of such SMS: no questions. This type of message doesn't seem desperate because it doesn't ask for a response. It simply communicates that the man is a funny guy sending a funny message. If she is interested in him, she will answer. Even if she doesn’t do this, you need to send 2-3 similar messages in the coming days. As soon as she answers, you need to continue the conversation as usual.
The young lady stubbornly avoids the topic of relationships2
How can you understand that a girl doesn’t want a relationship if she treats you quite warmly and friendly? It often happens that you seem to communicate well, but as soon as the conversation turns to matters of the heart, dating, or personal and intimate life, she falls silent, looks away, or tries to change the subject.
There is an explanation for everything, and the sweet lady probably has a good reason for avoiding relationships. Don’t rack your brains and don’t irritate the poor woman: ask directly if she wants to date you; if not, then why; and, finally, why this topic makes her so uncomfortable. If the woman deems it necessary, she will explain what is the matter.
Pseudo-panic message5
If the lead messages fail to grab her attention, then a faux panic text may be the last chance, an important message in which the man is worried about her whereabouts. Here are some examples:
- "You disappeared. Should we send a search group or a helicopter with special forces?”
- “I think you were kidnapped. Let me know and if you need it, I’ll throw on a cloak and fly there in no time.”
- The pseudo-panic message should be in a fun and playful manner. If she really wants to stay in touch, she will respond.
Saving time and money8
There is no need to desperately chase a girl with messages and calls. It's best not to bother responding to their messages. The solution is to focus on yourself, your finances, your health and success, making women your second priority. You should achieve that they achieve you. Take care of your health, visit the gym to make your physique attractive to women. Women are attracted to men who don't put them on a pedestal, but who put their own success above all else.
No – dependencies9
Regardless of the reasons why she doesn't respond, a man needs to always keep in mind one, unbreakable, infallible, absolute rule to get a girl to text - you can't need her when she's ignoring! If she ignores a man and he sends a bunch of double messages (or triple messages or more) asking her where she is, what she's doing, "Please answer," it makes him look weak, desperate and needy, which is very unattractive. So you can never be needy. But, if she has been ignoring the man for a day or two, then he should definitely try to revive the conversation the right way.
If a man is truly attractive, funny, and keeps a woman intrigued, he shouldn't have a problem with her not responding to messages. The important thing to remember is that you never have to worry about how to handle being ignored unless the woman is ignoring you in the first place!
What to do if you fall in love with a girl
Now that you are convinced that there is nothing strange or abnormal in your feeling, answering this question should be a little easier. But only a little: after all, falling in love almost always leads to awkwardness, embarrassment and real horror at the thought that the object of desire will find out about our feelings. What can we say about the situation when, to these ordinary sufferings of lovers, there is added the fear of being misunderstood, rejected and even ridiculed - after all, unfortunately, in our society the attitude towards same-sex love still leaves much to be desired.
The best advice on how to behave, you could give yourself... if you visited the future and found out how it all ended. We don’t know all the details of your life, but we’ll still try to analyze a few typical situations.
I fell in love with a girl and it seems to me that it is mutual
You notice that the object of your sympathy also shows signs of attention to you. But how can you determine that it is exactly what you are thinking about? If relationships between male friends are usually quite restrained, then girls can easily afford to hug each other, kiss each other on the cheek, give cute gifts and shower their friends with compliments. That’s why you are tormented by doubts: does she really reciprocate your feelings, or do you mistake ordinary manifestations of friendship for reciprocal love?
No matter how hard it is to admit your feelings, it will be better if you do it now and don’t let them eat you up from the inside.
If the girl you like really has reciprocal feelings for you, then you can well understand how difficult it is for her now. Clarifying the situation will be the best thing for both of you. But what if you were wrong and your confession ruins your friendship?
I just want to say: if you are dear to someone, this person will never push you away just because you fell in love with him or her. But, alas, different things happen in life, and you yourself might not have behaved quite adequately if you were in the place of the girl you are in love with. Therefore, try to honestly assess your condition today. Does communicating with this girl give you only positive emotions - or has the friendship turned into endless suffering because you constantly think that you are not destined to be together? If your crush makes you unhappy, then it is wiser to discuss the situation with the girl you like. There is always a risk of ruining a friendship, but if you continue to suppress your feelings, at one point your communication may become completely unbearable for you.
Help, I fell in love with a girl and I'm afraid that she will find out about it
Everything becomes much harder if you are sure that there can be no talk of any reciprocity. For example, the object of your sympathy has a young man, she is married, or you heard her speak unflatteringly about same-sex relationships. In addition, the situation in your city or in the team to which you both belong can serve as an additional demotivator.
It's unfortunate that you have to hide your feelings, but when it comes to personal safety and emotional comfort, your decision not to show your affection is probably completely justified.
However, if you have fallen unrequitedly in love with a girl, then there is no need to try to strangle or suppress these feelings within yourself. By doing this, you will only provoke a deterioration in your emotional, and possibly physical, state. Very soon we will write a separate article on how to deal with unrequited feelings. Perhaps she will help you get through this difficult period for you.
If your feelings do not bring you suffering, if the presence of your beloved girl inspires and inspires you, then perhaps the problem is actually not as serious as it seems. But if you feel that it’s hard for you to endure your meetings, if you feel dependent and unhappy, then you should talk about it with a loved one or a psychologist.
I fell in love with a girl, but I live with a guy
What to do if you have a boyfriend, you have a strong, long-term relationship... but you fell in love with a girl? The most obvious answer to this question is, of course, to prioritize. Even in the happiest relationships it is difficult to avoid temptations in the form of cute guys, but with a girl the case is completely different: after all, this is not an ordinary betrayal, this is something fundamentally new. In addition, many people think that going out with a person of the same sex is not cheating at all. But that's not true. Answer yourself this question, only honestly: what will really make you happy? A relationship with the guy you love, or a desire to experiment? Most likely, the first. But every situation is unique, and we don't know if you're truly happy with your boyfriend.
If your relationship can hardly be called healthy, you often quarrel, it is difficult for you to find a common language, or maybe he gives you unambiguous reasons for jealousy - it is better to end such a relationship.
Your falling in love is a signal: you are tired of this relationship, you need someone else. A person who will understand you; a person with whom it is good and easy. And there is nothing bad or strange about it being a girl.
By the way, the above also applies to the situation when a married woman fell in love with a girl. Yes, yes, although it’s hard to admit, family relationships sometimes make us unhappy, exhaust us and ultimately become an unbearable burden. And in this case, sympathy for a girl may be an indicator that not everything is in order in your family and, perhaps, for a long time.
