Are all men capable of cheating?
American scientists from Atlanta conducted a study: is the entire stronger sex capable of cheating? The conclusion was the following: the higher the level of testosterone in the blood, and the less time it takes for a new erection, the more likely it is that it will go “to the left.”
It sounds quite logical: if a guy has high potency, but they cannot satisfy him, he will be polygamous . And the lower the testosterone level, the less attraction to girls.
However, one cannot judge everyone by this criterion , because this is only the biological, that is, physiological side of the issue.
Still, we are all human, which means we have certain social rules and spiritual norms, fortitude, and will. It has been noted that guys have higher willpower than girls, which means that they are able to control themselves better.
A strong man is not dependent on other people's opinions and stereotypes
Therefore, it is worth considering how a young man generally views adultery, what the concepts of fidelity and devotion mean, and whether he believes in God.
Therefore, a partner with a strong personality is able to restrain his biological nature. He can limit himself if he has high testosterone levels and remain faithful to his lover.
Test. Forgive?
If you haven’t yet decided whether to solve the problem or leave the traitor, take the test. To ensure that the result is as accurate as possible, please answer honestly.
1. Does he regret cheating?
2. What kind of betrayal?
3. How did you find out about the betrayal?
4. Did he show himself with dignity before the betrayal?
5. Do you love him?
6. Is there criticism from loved ones regarding the fact of his betrayal?
7. Do you want revenge?
8. How often did you notice lies on his part?
9. Assess your readiness to maintain the relationship:
10. Length of betrayal:
If you have any questions, you can write them in the comments. We wish you all the best!
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Why does a man need sex?
The first reason why representatives of the stronger sex have sex is pleasure. Sex in itself is a pleasant experience, and with your beloved it is an incomparable euphoria.
The second reason: sex is a natural need, without satisfying which a person may feel uncomfortable, both psychologically and physically.
Sex is not only physical intimacy, but also spiritual. A close emotional connection between partners who love each other.
Photo of Maslow's pyramid of needs
Basic human needs - physiological - the foundation for realizing the need for communication and recognition
Men love sex by nature. They strive to conquer and conquer a lovely person. Courting her turns into a game, and sex is a reward, a prize.
- Sex as a means of socialization . If a young man is in demand among girls, others perceive him as a confident, real male worthy of respect.
- Sex and the pleasure derived from it, the orgasm itself, like any pleasant thing, is addictive . The desire to do it constantly, to bring new sensations, extreme.
- Sex is good for your health . Here is just a list of beneficial effects: training the cardiovascular system, reducing stress and depression, accelerating metabolism, getting rid of insomnia, helping to quit smoking.
Let us smoothly move on to another - more moral - reason for the intimate desires of reasons.
Why are men more likely to want to cheat?
Men are fertilizers, continuers of the family. Their natural purpose is to leave behind as many offspring as possible.
Therefore, their basic need is to win a large number of girls. They are interested in hunting, pursuing, and caring for the fair sex. Therefore, the stronger half is not always able to control their impulses, their urges to copulate.
Men are turned on by the process of conquest, and hence the attraction to numerous relationships
How to smell another man or woman?
You can tell by your partner's smell whether he is cheating or not. Is this really true?
If people have lived together for a long time, they know almost everything about each other, including smell. With the appearance of someone on the side, as some argue, the partner’s body changes the smell, which he himself cannot detect, but it is repulsive for the second partner.
So, at the end of the working day, a man smells not of sweat, but of women’s perfume, and the wife, on the contrary, smells of men’s perfume.
Smell is also one of the factors that attracts us to partners on a physiological level.
Why doesn't the need for cheating arise at the beginning of a relationship?
At the beginning of a relationship, passion always boils, you cannot tear yourself away from each other, romantic feelings simply overwhelm you and cover you completely.
is responsible for maintaining romantic relationships . It is involved in the formation of addictions , including love ones. We want our partner to behave the way we want, and when this happens, the brain perceives it as a reward.
However, over time passion subsides , lovers no longer try to show themselves only in the best light. Actions do not always satisfy us, and the effect of dopamine begins to weaken. There is a desire to fill the voids, we look for another source of pleasure.
In addition, at the beginning of a relationship, a huge place is given to close contact in a couple: holding hands, hugs, kisses, sex. Such gestures allow the production of the attachment hormone - oxytocin.
Oxytocin, or the hormone of tenderness, is produced against the background of developing confidence in a partner
Partners believe that no one exists in this world except them and cannot enjoy each other. Of course, adultery is not even a question.
But over time, the couple loses this contact. The lack of physical intimacy leads to the weakening of the oxytocin threads connecting the couple, which can later lead to adultery.
Therefore, it is extremely important, when passion subsides and relationships become measured, to make efforts to maintain them.
Why do guys cheat before marriage?
Although we have figured out that not all guys go to the left, let’s look at the reasons that can still push Casanova into adultery.
- Lack of attention, mutual understanding . Girls refuse to take the initiative, do not write or call first, even when their partner has already wooed them. No matter how brutal a guy is, he will be pleased to receive an SMS wishing him “have a good day” or “I love you.”
- No admiration or respect . A man wants to be a leader in a relationship, a strong support, a provider. At the beginning of a relationship, a girl admires her boyfriend and gives him a leadership role. But over time, the partners get used to each other, and the guy lacks the admiration and adoration of the girl.
- Need for touch . As a consequence of the previous two reasons, there is a lack of physical contact in a couple, be it hugs or sex. The guy wants not only care in words, but also in touch. Bring out the lady in you, gentle and elegant, show concern.
- A man is an alpha male , or wants to be one. There is an opinion that a mistress is an indicator of a person’s status and importance. An attempt to assert oneself.
- Monogamy is a utopia. Some guys are convinced to the core that monogamy is a myth, a utopia, that they are all polygamous by nature and cannot belong to just one person. Affairs are the norm for them. These people have a girlfriend for family life and a mistress for romance and passion.
- The girl doesn't take care of herself . When a lady in search is not in a relationship, she carefully takes care of herself in order to be attractive to the opposite sex. Often, when entering into a relationship, she begins to pay less attention to appearance. Men love with their eyes.
- Monotony . When a couple has been dating for a long time, the partners know each other inside and out. Some spark goes away, the relationship becomes routine.
Some men are adventurers by nature.
They are especially tired of routine and everyday life. There are many reasons for adultery, the least popular, but still possible:
- The girl blows her mind.
- The girl is not ready to experiment in bed.
Why do men cheat with their ex-girlfriends?
The fact of adultery is very hurtful, but it is doubly unpleasant and offensive if the mistress is the husband’s ex. Let's consider the reasons for an affair with an ex-girlfriend:
- Remember the past . Most likely, this girl reminds him of his youth, of his first love.
- There are still unanswered questions and unrealized opportunities . If there is any ambiguity left in their couple, most likely the spouse will remain attached to her on a subconscious level.
- Not strangers . It happens that due to certain situations, guys have to maintain contact with their exes (for example, a common child). They do not perceive themselves as strangers, but on the contrary, the ex-partner knows exactly what he likes.
There is cause for concern if a guy spends an unreasonable amount of time on his ex.
Reasons for a husband's cheating on his wife
The reasons a husband cheats on his wife are no different from the reasons a guy cheats on a girl. Yes, when you are married, the connection between you is stronger, but at the same time you have more life together, routine absorbs almost your entire life: children, bills, work, cleaning...
The family becomes a prison if there is not a minute of free time, a constant feeling of guilt. In some families, wives reproach their spouses for literally everything; he turns from the head of the family, the breadwinner, into a “scapegoat.”
The reason may also be a lack of love and attention to the partner. When children appear in the family, wives completely switch to them, abandoning their husbands and not paying attention to him. In this situation, the husband will find another woman who will give him affection.
Why does a married man cheat with his ex?
Some people have never been able to completely get over their feelings for their ex. This can cause fleeting passion and betrayal of your current spouse. Perhaps she still has some influence on him, and in surprise, the spark that once burned in their relationship will flare up.
The desire to change something in life, to bring back the past can arise in a man at the age of 30-35
If a husband cheated with his ex-wife, then...
If the husband cheats with his ex-girlfriend, then the last argument in favor of the decision will be the question: to forgive or not? Further analysis is carried out based on two positions:
- Do you feel guilty for your husband's actions?
- Will it be comfortable (psychologically) for you to continue living with him?
These arguments are somewhat interrelated.
In the first case, if you did not intentionally or accidentally provoke your spouse to commit an act of infidelity, then the conclusion is simple: the betrayal was committed with obvious intent, immoderation, that is, he does not feel true love for you (it went away over time or did not exist at all) , this fact will cause serious psychological discomfort. If you leave everything as it is, you can aggravate the situation; keeping the faithful in marriage is inappropriate.
In the second case, if you specifically pushed your husband to commit a crime, then you need to start looking for those character traits (yours) that need to be corrected. This is done with a psychologist or during the conversation “What’s wrong with me?” Next, you must look at your emotional state and answer the questions “Will I be able to live peacefully with my husband who betrayed me, forgetting about his adventures, never remembering? Am I going to get depressed? (See: How to cope with depression after your husband cheats?) Start from the answer.
Also, if your husband cheated with his ex-wife, but you still haven’t come to a decision, the following aspects will affect him:
- Well-being or lack thereof;
- Real estate and movable jointly acquired property;
- Having a child (or several).
Many nuances will dictate their own rules for further actions. For example, if you are a housewife without work experience, and your husband owns a business, an apartment in which you live with three children, then your chances of divorcing your marriage with your head held high will be diminished. But! There are lawyers who can help you draw up a competent divorce plan.
Study additional materials to be fully equipped:
- The husband admitted to cheating. What to do?
- My husband is cheating. What to do?
- Should you forgive your husband's betrayal?
- How to survive your husband's betrayal?
What if we are not married, but live together?
If a couple lives together but is not married, it is a civil marriage. Alas, even in this situation, guys cheat. The problem is that 90% of women in civil marriages consider themselves married, and 85% of guys consider themselves bachelors.
The reasons remain : dissatisfaction with life or partner, desire for something new, etc. As a rule, a combination of reasons usually leads to adultery. And not all people are ready to recognize and realize them.
If you find out that your partner is unfaithful to you, talk to him and decide what you will do next.
The problem with trial marriages is that people in such situations do not recognize each other, but only get confused in illusions
Can you forgive? Is it worth saving this relationship or is it better to leave and burn all bridges? Everyone decides for themselves.
And finally - a few frank stories.
What to do if your husband is communicating with his ex-girlfriend?
First of all, you must answer yourself the question: can you be sure that he is sleeping with her? If you know this for sure, all the answers are given in the previous paragraphs of the article, and at this point you can close the tab.
If you are not at all sure that your husband is cheating on you, I have a question for you: what is wrong with him communicating with his ex-girlfriend? If he was once with her, it means they came together on the basis of common interests or acquired them in the process of the relationship. They have many common memories, topics of conversation, and hobbies.
An ex-partner can become a wonderful friend and interlocutor. There is nothing wrong with a person communicating with someone who was once close to him.
The absence of jealousy in such a situation and trust will make you wiser in the eyes of your husband and will make him respect you even more. You can even try to get to know his ex if you are willing to be sincerely friendly and appropriate.
The main thing is not to make attempts to “discourage” your husband. So you will simply become an “always nagging” stupid wife, and they quickly run away from such people.
They cheat, but don’t leave: shocking revelations from men about cheating
Why does he cheat, but does not leave the family? In most cases, husbands have a sense of duty to the mother of their children and respect for their wife. She went through many trials with him and remained by his side in difficult moments of his life.
In addition, the representative of the stronger sex is comfortable with such a rhythm of life. A husband can also be restrained by public opinion.
Here are some stories on this topic.
- A married couple has been married for 35 years . The wife began to notice that her husband had become secretive, closed, a little nervous, and twitchy. After some time, she found out that he had a mistress. Having laid her cards on the table, she proposed a divorce, but he refused; the husband was happy with the situation. Moreover, they have adult children and grandchildren who come to them on weekends. How will they explain divorce to their children?
- Boy and girl, married 8 years . My husband got a new job, where he met a new girl, with whom he began to build close communication. The wife noticed the correspondence, frequent calls to her, a condom and a movie ticket that fell out of her pocket and understood everything. She offered to go to her mistress and file for a divorce, but the guy refused, saying that this was her speculation and she just needed to work on the relationship. If there is a divorce, it will not be because of the appearance of a mistress, but because the spouse has become intolerable, it has become impossible to live with her.
Read more articles about betrayal at the link.
Husband cheated with his ex
Hello Tatiana! I, too, was “horned” in the past... I understand your feelings about this.
From the letter I see that you have a lot of disappointments in this marriage. And I also notice that something is happening in your relationship with your husband now.
Since you started a family, it means that you once wanted to be together, there was something attractive about your partner, and something attracted him to you. But then, as you write, something changed, there was no more sex, your husband doesn’t want to discuss this problem with you, cheating happened...
As a rule, when people get together, they are driven by a feeling of falling in love. Then the love passes and “everyday life” begins. The essence of the period of “everyday life” is that two different people with different characters and habits met, they need to get along together.
But you can “get along” in different ways. You can stay together and fight every day. Or you can understand the value of a partner and relationships, try to be careful towards your partner.
And whether “true love” will come to the couple depends on the results with which the period of “everyday life” has passed. Yes, yes, love does not come immediately, but after some time, through trials.
It seems that you are now just crossing the line of “everyday life”. But, apparently, this period was not the easiest. And you now have “emotional losses”: loss of warmth in your relationship with your husband. It sounds like your husband is worried about this too.
Your relationship can be improved, you just need to make an effort. Remember what you valued in your husband, why you liked him? He has qualities for which he can be respected. Show this respect to him, show that he is valuable to you. This will make a great contribution to the relationship. Show him that you need him, his care, his tenderness and love. This will give him strength.
But if these methods do not help, it is better to go together to a family psychologist and try to talk with your husband with the help of a specialist. Perhaps your husband is greatly offended by something in your relationship, so he is not ready to have a heart-to-heart talk with you right now.
A year after the divorce, I realized that my relationship with my husband could be worked on and could be changed. Can you imagine what a shame? That's why I advise you to work on your relationships. You can always leave. But people (especially close ones) should not be scattered. You have already experienced so much together, this is a great value in our time. Help each other a little and everything will be fine.
Good luck to you!
Cheated on my boyfriend with my ex (2 answers)
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