Are you comfortable communicating with your surroundings? Article. Communication skills. Self-knowledge.ru

Methods used for effective communication

It is necessary to create a calm environment and stop being nervous, as your state is instantly conveyed to your interlocutor or audience to whom you need to speak. You also need to create conditions in which nothing distracts you from the conversation or attracts the attention of the audience.
First, convey your situation to your interlocutor and give the person the opportunity to express his opinion about his attitude towards it. Based on this information, you can now express your opinion to your interlocutor or opponent. Having learned in advance a person’s attitude to a particular topic, it is much easier to influence a person.
Another effective communication method is inclusion in the situation. Tell the person a story from your life with a similar ending.
It is very important to learn not to judge a person, not to label him. Try to understand what he says without distorting and interpreting the information in your own way. To do this, do not hesitate to ask questions: “Did I understand you correctly? What did you mean by this? etc"
If you need to convince a person, tell him several stories from your life with the ending you want. In your speech, refer to authoritative sources of information.
Help the person draw the right conclusions and tell them all the advantages of solving a certain problem with a new method. Be direct about your intentions and voice your proposal.
After the end of the negotiations or speech, say that you enjoyed communicating and you intend to continue cooperation. Regardless of the outcome of the conversation, you are ready to provide help or service at any time.

VUZRU

The psychological climate in general is the communication between employees of an organization in the process of performing their immediate tasks. Of course, it can be comfortable and uncomfortable for people, as it depends on a number of circumstances.

A comfortable psychological climate is a favorable atmosphere in a team, in which employees enjoy being in their workplace, interact pleasantly with each other, and interpersonal relationships do not cause destructive conflicts.

In other words, the psychological climate of a team is the qualitative side of relationships, which manifests itself in the form of a set of psychological conditions that promote or hinder productive joint activities.

According to V. M. Shepel’s definition, the psychological climate is the emotional coloring of the psychological connections of employees, arising on the basis of sympathies, coincidence of characters, interests, and inclinations.

In a comfortable psychological climate, a person enjoys his work activity, so his productivity increases sharply. Likewise, if a company does not have enough conditions for a comfortable environment, its social and economic efficiency will be significantly lower. According to some studies by psychologists, prolonged bad mood of the team reduces the effectiveness of its work by about 1.5 times.

All team members must be satisfied with their position and work process. At the same time, it is desirable that people be in a friendly atmosphere, but not be best friends - this will slow down the work. The relationship should always remain businesslike.

Signs of a favorable psychological climate:

confidence;
high level of demands of group members towards each other;
the presence of constructive criticism in the absence of destructive conflicts;
the opportunity to freely express one’s own opinion when discussing issues affecting the entire team;
lack of pressure from managers on subordinates and recognition of their right to participate in decision-making;
sufficient awareness of employees about their own tasks and the general state of affairs in the company;
people's satisfaction with belonging to a team and relationships with colleagues, comfort in the workplace;
a high degree of emotional involvement and the presence of team spirit, mutual assistance in difficult situations;
understanding and recognition of areas of responsibility not only for one’s immediate responsibilities, but also for the general state of affairs;
satisfaction of team members with the nature and content of their work.

Signs of an unfavorable psychological climate:

low labor productivity;
violations of discipline (frequent tardiness, constant breaks in work, personal work during working hours);
spreading rumors and gossip;
constant dissatisfaction with the orders and actions of managers;
frequent complaints about the volume/content of work and working conditions;
systematic violation of work deadlines;
frequent conflicts between employees, constant unconstructive criticism;
high staff turnover;
frequent errors in work, unclear fulfillment of duties and orders of management.

The concept of “psychological contract”, which is identified by many specialists involved in labor relations, is closely related to the psychological climate. A psychological contract is a combination of beliefs held by employees and organizational management regarding their expectations of each other. It can be described as the mutual but unspoken expectations that exist between employees and their managers. As defined by Rousseau and Wade-Benzoni, psychological contracts concern beliefs about the promises made and accepted by the parties. These parties include employees, customers, managers and the organization as a whole. In other words, psychological contracts show how people interpret promises and agreements made.

Psychologists Katz and Kahn note that in organizations, each role is a collection of behaviors and expectations. Basic motivational models, such as Vroom's expectancy theory, posit that employees engage in behaviors that they believe will lead to positive consequences.

The psychological contract gives the employee answers to the most important questions regarding work activity: “What can be expected from.

From the perspective of most workers, aspects of work should include:

confidence in equality, justice and stability;
job security;
the opportunity to demonstrate one’s abilities and demonstrate competence;
opportunity for career growth and availability of conditions for training and development;
constant involvement in the work process.

From the employers' point of view, the psychological contract includes the following aspects:

employee commitment to the company;
careful compliance by the employee with job functions and duties;
employee competence in performing work;
subordination to the manager, carrying out his instructions.

Factors that influence the psychological climate in a company can be divided into internal (depending on the organization) and external (beyond its capabilities). The level of influence of external conditions can be completely different depending on the actions of management, the degree of cohesion, motivation and involvement of employees, the stability of the company itself, and the stability of its position in the market.

Relationships between people develop as a result of the emergence of likes and dislikes. It is obvious that it is much easier for people who sympathize with each other to work together, they quickly find a compromise and more often come to mutual understanding, as a result of which they work more efficiently.

The most important condition for a comfortable psychological climate is that each employee is engaged in an interesting, important and useful task from his point of view. Of course, the company does not have the ability to fulfill the wishes of the entire team at once. But you need to try to get as close as possible to such a situation and provide employees with what they consider most important for themselves (this could be a good salary, the content of work, communication with colleagues, and a degree of independence and responsibility).

In this sense, the psychological climate is directly related to motivation. It is very important to create favorable working conditions. A motivating work environment includes the professional activities of personnel, the characteristics of tasks and all situations in which employees may find themselves. To create such an environment, it is necessary to take into account the individual characteristics of workers, the characteristics of the work performed and the work environment.

There are many different motivational theories, since each scientist evaluates certain approaches to motivating personnel in his own way. To develop the principles of a comfortable psychological climate in a particular organization, you can use Herzberg’s two-factor theory. The essence of his theory is that there are two groups of factors influencing human behavior.

Hygienic factors (health factors) are associated with the human environment, these include working conditions, wages, relationships with colleagues, superiors and subordinates. They can also be called external factors. These factors themselves cannot be motivating, since they cannot cause a feeling of job satisfaction without a second group. However, their deterioration causes demotivation and leads to dissatisfaction with one's work and reluctance to perform it.

Motivating factors are related to the nature and essence of work (achieving goals, success, recognition, professional growth, degree of responsibility, self-realization). They are internal factors and contribute to a sense of job satisfaction.

From this theory it follows that the psychological climate relates to hygienic factors, therefore, its deterioration leads to complete demotivation of people. In other words, we can once again emphasize that a comfortable psychological climate is the most important condition for the effective operation of the entire organization.

Returning to the conditions for the existence of a comfortable psychological climate, it is necessary to mention that employees must receive all the information that concerns them in order to be ready for any changes and not feel disadvantaged due to ignorance and misunderstanding of the current situation. Insufficient information leads to rumors, and uncertainty often breeds fear. When employees begin to fear the current conditions, work fades into the background.

In turn, timely information to employees provides a sense of self-confidence and trust in the actions of the manager. Employees must have an adequate understanding of what is happening around them. Resources may include: intranet (internal network), corporate newspapers/magazines, honor boards, corporate radio/television, company websites, social media accounts, as well as oral transmission of information at meetings. For example, you can hold meetings at which the main results of the year are summed up, everyone reports on the areas of work within the scope of their responsibility, ideas for further development are proposed, and those who have achieved high results are rewarded.

Naturally, a comfortable psychological climate cannot arise independently; it is always the result of purposeful actions to improve the environment in the workplace, and depends not only on management, but also on the rest of the team.

Developing a strategy to ensure the climate is right for an organization depends on many factors, including the stage of the life cycle at which it is located. Most often, at the first stage - the stage of creation and the first steps of the organization - all people are united by common goals, dreams and visions of the future. This feeling helps them to be inspired, united and positive towards each other. Therefore, the main task of management is to maintain this attitude and make it the standard of employee behavior in the future.

As the business grows and develops, the team becomes larger, more diverse, and it is much more difficult to unite it around a single ideal that everyone strives for, because the more people there are, the more different opinions, desires and ways of working. As soon as the first excitement passes, employees begin to take a closer look at each other, notice differences and shortcomings, they have misunderstandings, disputes and conflicts. At this stage, it is especially important to pay attention to the personal qualities of the hired employees, and not just their professional knowledge, skills and abilities. When selecting personnel, it is necessary to carefully evaluate how well a person fits the company in terms of values, pace of work, and the concept of work process. To do this, you need to understand what is most valued in the organization, what its mission is, what it plans to achieve. Ultimately, the degree to which people’s values are similar will influence the emergence of sympathies, help them work more effectively and make joint decisions, and increase the ability to build and maintain a comfortable psychological climate.

Communicating a company's priorities to its employees can be difficult. Not everyone knows how to correctly format all the information so that it is easily absorbed and remembered by all team members. In reputation management there is a concept - legend (or story telling), which means the ability to effectively present stories. Stories position the company, convey its mission and values. The advantage of this approach is that stories - like beautiful fairy tales - are easier to associate with personal experience than boring and long documents. They colorfully illustrate how the company operates and what it considers important to its employees.

Main stories of company legends:

we are proud of our leader (especially if the company is named after the creator);
we are proud of our team (if there are employees known throughout the country/world);
we are proud of our products (if there are famous brands);
we are proud of our achievements (companies that have patented know-how and technologies);
We are proud of our financial performance (for those working in the financial sector);
We are proud of our history (for companies with a long history that have been on the market for a long time).

The brand legend creates a complete and detailed direction for further communications, since a brief formulation of the brand idea can be understood and interpreted differently by everyone, while the full brand history creates a more detailed picture. When there is a single, well-formulated legend, it is much easier for the whole team to work.

For the future successful implementation of a strategy for ensuring a comfortable psychological climate, when developing it, it is worth paying attention to the creation of an adaptation system for new employees, which will include not only introducing a newcomer to the job and training him in his immediate responsibilities, but also determining the behavior accepted in the company in various situations , methods of internal communications, ethical standards and getting to know colleagues. If adaptation is not at the proper level, new employees will not be able to understand what behavior is expected of them and will make mistakes in communicating with colleagues and superiors. This will most likely lead to mutual dissatisfaction, dismissal and, subsequently, high staff turnover. Therefore, it is necessary to carefully consider the process of integrating newcomers into the team.

Another point that should not be forgotten when creating a psychological climate is the construction of an organizational structure with clear areas of responsibility, in which the responsibilities of employees do not overlap and complement each other. In addition, the company must have a clear performance evaluation system, in which each person understands what goals are set for him, in what ways they can be achieved, and what to receive as compensation.

When implementing a strategy, it is necessary to give an important role to the team leader. He must himself understand the goals facing the organization and be able to correctly convey them to his subordinates. In addition, it defines the basic principles of corporate culture, which form the psychological climate.

There is a concept close to the psychological climate - “organizational behavior” - the behavior and interaction of people in the process of individual and group work.

The responsibilities of HR management include ensuring effective organizational behavior. For productive personnel management, it is important to identify the factors influencing employees, namely, their main basic characteristics:

individual differences (people's abilities, their intelligence, character, origin, culture, gender, race);
positions, attitudes towards specific situations and life in general (reasons and manifestations);
attribution theory (how people form judgments about each other);
coordination/organizational theory (approaches to doing work);
role theory (the place that people occupy in work activities).

The involvement of the HR manager (or immediate supervisor) in these factors:

individual differences

They must be taken into account during job creation, preparation of training programs, assessment and supervision of personnel, development of reward systems, and handling of complaints and disciplinary problems. The main thing to remember is that all people are different, so what suits one may not suit another.

positions, attitudes towards specific situations and life in general

They should not be judged or stereotyped. People can change over time, this is also worth considering. As mentioned, it is impossible to fully accommodate the needs of all team members, but if you do not pay attention to this aspect, you can put too much pressure on people and expose them to stress and burnout.

attribution theory

All people try to explain the motives and reasons for this or that behavior of their colleagues. But when assessing performance, you need to be very careful and not make hasty conclusions about what motivated a person to act in this particular way (since the motives may be deeper and not lie on the surface).

coordination/organizational theory

The importance of this aspect is that it reminds us of the influence of external factors on the degree of employee motivation.

role theory

Helps determine what approach is needed to each person in order to correctly explain to him what is required of him. When taking role theory into account when assigning responsibilities, the risk of assigning an employee a task that he cannot cope with is reduced. Moreover, this helps to avoid potential conflicts between team members (and increase the level of comfort in the psychological climate).

The following special measures are used to create a comfortable environment: scientifically based selection, training and periodic certification of management personnel (as well as personnel department employees); staffing teams taking into account the psychological compatibility of its members; application of various socio-psychological methods.

One of the ways to achieve mutual favor among colleagues is to create project teams through independent selection of partners. To do this, you can use various sociographic methods with the help of which people express their preferences and fall into groups that suit them.

One method involves each person choosing two other members of his team whom he likes the most and with whom he prefers to work. After conducting the survey, a sociogram of preferences is constructed, which depicts participants connected by arrows (each arrow is drawn from one person to the other two whom he has chosen for cooperation). Using such a scheme, you can not only form mini groups, but also understand which of the people is chosen most often and is an informal leader, who enjoys the favor of many and can be in almost any group, and who has problems in terms of communicating with colleagues.

In another method, each person receives a questionnaire with a list of colleagues. He should give preference to only three, rating them from one to three points (three points are given to the one with whom the person is most comfortable).

The points received by each participant are added up, after which people can also be divided into leaders, “average” and least sociable and combined into groups so that all three types are present in each.

Another way is to compile a preference matrix. Team members evaluate each other: -1 (negative attitude), 0 (neutral attitude), +1 (positive attitude).

We must not forget that sociographic methods have their drawbacks:

There is always a danger of information leakage, which can lead to conflicts as a result of everyone learning each other’s opinions
there is a great possibility that the leaders will not be the most professional people, but the most friendly and pleasant to talk to.

After implementing any strategy, you need to focus on how exactly it works and what improvements it requires. Regarding the strategy for increasing the comfort of the psychological climate, it is important to remember that the organization’s personnel policy plays a very important role. It should clearly spell out everything that may affect employees - their working conditions, promotion opportunities, terms of training and advanced training, remuneration rules (what is included in the permanent and what is in the variable part of the salary, and what is required to increase variable bonuses and awards), the presence of non-material types of motivation, internal rules of corporate culture and business etiquette (principles of communication, dress code, speech etiquette).

Moreover, due to the fact that the situation in the company is constantly changing along with changes in the market, the company's management must periodically assess the psychological climate and check whether it needs changes. There are a huge number of methods for measuring the level of comfort in the workplace, for example:

Survey methods

(questionnaire, interview, conversation)

Color Relationship Test

A test in which you need to match each person's color. according to personal perception. Each color has a specific meaning, which is taken into account when deciphering the results.

Sociometry

GOAL

Litvin and Stringer questionnaire

Includes eight categories:

Structure
Responsibility
Risk
Heat
Support
Standards
Conflict
Identification

Formation of a comfortable psychological climate using the example of The Walt Disney Company:

When hiring, the applicant is not asked difficult professional questions; they are much more interested in his personal qualities and previous work experience. Sometimes an HR specialist may even ask about a person’s favorite Disney character or why a person chose this particular company. Most often, the candidate is asked to complete a test task. But HR specialists call the main feature of the interview a detailed story about the company’s business, which takes up a significant part of the interview. It is important to convey to them that Disney is not only animation, so that future employees, when they come to work, understand what else the company does.

The onboarding process for new employees is quite lengthy—about a year. During this time, the specialist immerses himself in his field and learns about the peculiarities of the company’s work as a whole. Each newcomer is given a list of department representatives with whom they need to schedule an introduction meeting. Thus, a person immediately develops a more complete picture of the company and an understanding of who to contact if questions arise during the work process.

In addition, on the employee’s first day of work, the HR manager sends out to all departments a photo of the newcomer and information about him: his short biography and a description of new responsibilities, and also creates his profile on the corporate intranet.

While working, each team member can ask for help from a colleague from any Disney office around the world. To do this, just go to the electronic directory, where all the company’s contacts are stored, or use the corporate social network.

According to employee reviews, the office has a creative and friendly atmosphere. There is no strict dress code; almost everyone communicates with each other on a first-name basis.

In addition, every two years Disney conducts a global internal employee engagement survey, for which each employee receives a link to an anonymous questionnaire. The results are analyzed and, based on them, an action plan is drawn up to improve working conditions in the company.

conclusions

Based on the foregoing, we can conclude that a comfortable psychological climate directly affects the performance of any organization, therefore it should be the subject of periodic research and control. It is advisable to constantly improve the conditions for maintaining a favorable atmosphere, such as: mutual sympathy, employment in a job that suits everyone, normal wages, clear and precise responsibilities, timely information about changes. However, it is important to remember the fact that no two organizations are the same, so the conditions for the emergence of a comfortable psychological climate can be completely different. It all depends on the personalities of the manager and subordinates, the size of the company and its age.

A comfortable psychological climate requires careful organization of the work activities of all team members and their close cooperation. To successfully develop and implement a strategy, constant monitoring and control of any processes related to running a business is necessary. With any innovations or changes, you need to think about how it might affect the work environment. The role of the manager is very important, since he should oversee all stages of team formation: recruitment and selection of personnel, adaptation, delegation, control, certification, promotion.

The Impact of Nonverbal Communication on Effective Communication

The human subconscious perceives non-verbal signs as more sincere. A person perceives more than half of the information from non-verbal sources. Therefore, it is important to learn how to use nonverbal methods of effective communication.

Repeating the gestures of the interlocutor helps to quickly establish contact and build trust.
Keep a distance of at least half a meter so as not to violate a person’s personal space. If you are not seeing each other for the first time and contact has already been established. You can touch the person or pat him on the shoulder.
While talking, do not touch your nose and lips . People perceive these gestures as signs of lying.
Postures and gestures during a conversation should be open . This demonstrates your goodwill and sincerity.
Try not to speak quickly or slowly , not to speak too loudly and to pronounce your words clearly.
Do not use the particle “not” , it turns the interlocutor against you. Say better: “I agree with you, but...” than “I don’t agree or you’re wrong.”
When listening to your interlocutor, lean forward a little and nod periodically . This is a sign that you agree with your interlocutor and are ready to cooperate.

Effective communication from a psychological point of view

A person learns to communicate from early childhood. Communication helps a person survive. There are people who know how to establish contacts from childhood. But knowledge of the essence of the psychology of communication helps every person to better understand themselves and those around them, to receive joy from communication, from receiving new information and benefits from friendly and business communication.

You need to be able to communicate correctly with any people, even those who are arrogant and aggressive. Let's look at the main aspects in psychology that help make communication effective.

A person must be self-sufficient, understand his worth and the value of his personal opinion. In turn, also understand the value of the interlocutor’s opinion. Respect his view on life.
When the interests and desires of the interlocutors coincide, communication goes smoothly. But how to behave when a conflict is brewing?
When communicating, a person should feel comfortable and relaxed
Don't be afraid to express your feelings and emotions. Shyness, stiffness and uncertainty make communication boring and uninteresting.
When communicating, it is important to show care and respect for both yourself and your interlocutor.
Interest in the conversation and your curiosity gives the interlocutor the opportunity to tell more about himself. You should always try to find positive qualities in people, then interest in the person will manifest itself.
Openness and sincerity in communicating with loved ones is simply necessary. Otherwise, any conversation loses its meaning.
You need to learn to accept yourself and the other person for who they are. In this case, you can not be afraid to remain yourself and not adapt to the opinion of another person. Both you and he have the right to your point of view. If you are too emotional, then do not engage in conversations about politics, religion or other ideological topics.
Work with emotions . Meditation practices will help you with this. It is necessary that you can maintain inner peace and personal space.
Keep your distance, depending on how familiar you are with the person . Do not violate your own or others' personal space.
Communication is not only pleasant friendly conversations, but also the opportunity to conduct business and resolve issues . Therefore, you must take into account the character traits and profession of your interlocutor. A teacher will always teach, a person in power will command and control, a doctor will look for diseases.

How to feel inner comfort

It is very important to remember your comfortable state every time so that you can call it up when something suddenly goes wrong.

When you are disappointed, judged by other people, or your own inner critic begins to become overly active.

Think, analyze: what should your internal state be like for you to feel comfortable?

Remember those situations in which you felt comfortable and calm.

When you felt inspired.
When successful, interesting thoughts came into your head.
When you were both energetic and relaxed, peaceful.

These are the very moments in life when everything worked out for you. Everything was going well.

If you “remember with your skin” what a true state of comfort within yourself is, you will learn to quickly tune in to it.

Cause appropriate positive feelings of your own free will, and not wait for them to appear by coincidence.

And immerse yourself in them, protecting yourself from the possible influence of negative feelings and thoughts.

As mentioned above, a feeling of inner spiritual comfort in psychology is regarded as a subjective thing; this state can be felt in different ways and in different situations.

The situation is especially suitable when initially you did not expect the best at all; rather, on the contrary, you were sure of loss or refusal. And then - once! - and everything worked out as if by magic.

Time frames are completely irrelevant here. It could have been a long time ago: for example, when you got an A on a test at school.

It doesn’t matter when, it doesn’t matter in what circumstances. The main thing is to evoke a living memory of this inner state of happiness, lightness and delight. Try to “enter” it, be filled with it - and hold it in yourself.

It is also advisable to prepare in advance for the fact that any answer - both positive and negative - will benefit you.

In this case, the wait ceases to be painful. It is clear that this does not solve the issue of employment in practical terms, but it helps to avoid a lot of doubts, torment and worries.

You might say to yourself, “If I get an offer from an employer, great! So it was meant to be.

And if I don’t get it, it’s probably the best thing that could happen in this situation. It is possible that in this way I will avoid a lot of problems and disappointments that await me in the future at this job!”

Many things that happen to you should not be assessed unambiguously. No matter how events unfold, it may happen that in the future they are exclusively positive for you personally.

The amount of stress we experience from criticism depends on how badly we want a particular outcome.

For example, we expect praise, tune in to it, and end up facing condemnation.

Disappointment in such a situation will be more destructive than when we expected nothing at all.

An initially even attitude in communication creates a calmer reaction and a friendly atmosphere.

When we are completely freed from unambiguous expectations when communicating with other people, we may get the strange impression of complete detachment and excessive emotional coldness.

If a person does not expect something specific, then he does not constrain himself to the rigid framework of interaction with people. It's about freedom. One that gives you the opportunity to really move towards your goal, to achieve something important.

Methods of effective communication from Dale Carnegie

Dale Carnegie is known throughout the world as the author of the book “How to Win Friends and Influence People.” The methods of effective communication recommended by the psychologist are very popular, as they are relevant and useful for everyone. Let's look at the main ten methods of effective communication:

Be a good listener. Before expressing or imposing your opinion, it is better to hear the opinion of your interlocutor on a certain topic. This will help not only to win the person over, but also to anticipate his reaction to a particular topic in advance.
Show sincere interest in the interlocutor , ask him questions. In this case, he will express as much information about himself as possible. This will build your trust and help you redirect the conversation in the direction you want.
Behave diplomatically , do not get carried away with criticism. Talk more about the fact that you agree with the interlocutor, but in some nuances you think a little differently. Speak softly and do not focus on the person’s shortcomings. Ask questions so that the interlocutor answers them in the affirmative. This way you will achieve agreement during the further conversation.
Never argue. Listen to other people's opinions and show respect. Perhaps you really did not take into account or overlooked something. There are never winners in an argument. Everyone has their own opinion, but it’s worth hearing the opposite opinion.
If you want a person to do something, then you need to make him want it. Awaken the person's interest and desire to achieve what you need.
When fishing, without thinking about my own preferences, I bait the hook not with strawberries and cream, but with a worm. © Dale Carnegie
Don't try to convey your idea to the end . Unobtrusively talk about your idea, and let the person get excited about it and develop this idea. Let him think that she belongs to him. Then he will selflessly want to bring it to life.
When listening to a person's problem, put yourself in his place . This will help you quickly understand and understand its essence.
Never give orders , it hurts a person’s self-esteem. It’s better to ask him questions, and let him decide for himself how to cope with this or that task. This develops creative thinking and relieves you of resentment from your subordinates.
Tell the person how valuable and important he is . Self-love and a sense of importance are great incentives to work.
To draw attention to your ideas, present them in a bright and visual way. For example, like in advertising. A boring presentation with graphs and numbers will leave everyone indifferent. A strong presentation will draw attention to your idea.

Dale Carnegie's methods of effective communication help people become more successful and influential communicators, avoid conflicts and disputes, and gain confidence in their words and actions.

How to understand if this is your person

Geographical proximity

Unfortunately or fortunately, the geography of residence also matters.

And the first thing you should find out during the first conversation is where your potential friend (girlfriend) lives.

“There’s nothing worse than meeting someone you think is interesting, only to find out you live far away from each other. There’s nothing more frustrating when long distances prevent you from continuing to communicate,” says Davis.

And even if your compatibility is one hundred percent, you are unlikely to be able to disrupt your usual way of life to move in with a person. And he is unlikely to do the same for you. Well, if this suddenly happens, it means that you are really destined for each other by Fate itself.

Unfortunately, in most cases, the truth is that distance makes meaningful communication difficult, at least in the early stages of a relationship.

You understand each other's humor

A good sense of humor is what many people are looking for.

In relationships, friendships or just communication, it is very important that people have a similar sense of humor. You need to be able to understand each other's jokes.

Otherwise, the conversation may simply not go well, and it will be very difficult for the interlocutors to be on the same wavelength.

Imagine a situation where one of the interlocutors is an incorrigible joker, and the second is an eternal beech, absolutely devoid of a sense of humor. It is unlikely that both will be enough for more than one single conversation.

Healthy humor is an important component of our lives.

It is not only the basis for building strong relationships, but also what helps us get through difficult times. Therefore, choose in life those who know how to make you laugh.

Your weekends are pretty much the same.

"How did you spend your weekend?"

This seemingly simple question, in fact, can clarify something and tell a lot about a person.

Psychologists advise that when meeting a person, be sure to ask him this question. In fact, it is very important for assessing compatibility.

Knowing how a potential partner/friend likes to spend their free time is a great way to find out what life together with them will look like.

For example, if your ideal weekend involves curling up on the couch with a good book, but your new friend's life moves at a completely different pace (he likes nightclubs, parties, and hanging out with friends), then you're probably incompatible.

So the next time someone you know asks you this question, instead of rolling your eyes and clicking in displeasure, try answering it in as much detail as possible! says Davis.

Psychology of dealing with arrogant people

In life we meet different people, and we must be ready for any communication. Often on our path in life we encounter insolent people - these are people who behave shamelessly and arrogantly in order to achieve their own goals and benefits. They don't take anyone's opinion into account, don't care about other people's feelings, and believe that they are always right.

You can behave differently with arrogant people. For example, respond to rudeness with rudeness, ignore, manipulate, put in place. It all depends on the situation and who is in front of you. Being rude to your boss will be fraught with danger, for example.

The first thing you need to do is not be afraid to say no. You need to be tough and not fall for any persuasion or manipulation. If you don't understand the refusal, start ignoring it.
Try not to stoop to the level of insolence, no matter how much you want to be rude. This way you will be involved in his dirty game and are unlikely to be able to verbally defeat a born boor.
The main goal of an insolent person is to throw you off balance and force you to do what he wants. So try to remain patient and calm. Drive him crazy with your calmness and let him go looking for another victim.
Never allow anyone to violate your personal boundaries and mind their own business. You have every right to protect your personal space.

You must understand that all methods of effective communication are based on understanding yourself and your interlocutor. You must learn to understand people, understand who you are dealing with. In any case, respect, acceptance and awareness of the value of each person are the basis of successful communication.