Living without love may be simple,
but how can you live in the world without love?
Do you think that an ordinary “average” person can live his entire life without love, without relationships? I think no.
If your love relationship has reached a dead end and you are afraid that at any moment everything could collapse completely, urgently read this >>>
Love is within us. Love is our nature, it lies dormant in the heart of every person. It permeates everything around us, painting our world with bright colors, filling us with fantastic sensations and giving us unforgettable emotions.
Now I’m talking specifically about the love between a man and a woman. About that feeling that connects us in pairs, gives birth to serious love relationships and leads us to creating a family.
Love between a man and a woman: disease or cure?
Love... Scientists never tire of analyzing this sublime feeling. According to their research, love affects our body like a drug or painkiller, literally intoxicating us.
Psychologists say that a person cannot live a harmonious life without love: he needs it and plunges into depression if he does not find it.
And the World Health Organization has added love to the register of diseases under the official number F63.9.
Everyone who has at least once experienced this intoxicating feeling strives to experience it again by entering into a love relationship. Whether active or in the background, we are always on the lookout. We meet people on the streets, register on dating sites, look closely at colleagues and enthusiastically join new companies. And all this, in most cases, in order to meet your person and find love.
On the subject: What is love?
Psychology of men in love: features and secrets of his relationships
If you haven’t found signs of love in your chosen one, don’t be upset. The psychology of love and relationships will give you a hint on how to win the heart of your loved one. There are 4 female archetypes living in the subconscious of every man.
- Eve is a homemaker, a mother, a cozy earthly woman;
- Elena is the archetype of the ideal lover, capable of charming with her eroticism;
- Maria is a comrade-in-arms, a fighting friend;
- Sofia is a wise advisor and ideological inspirer.
If you can embody all these 4 archetypes and learn to switch between them in time, then you are guaranteed adoration from the male sex. You can watch many interesting videos on the topic of relations between the sexes here.
Who seeks will always find
And we find it. As a rule, suddenly.
We meet, fall in love and plunge into a state numbered F63.9 from the WHO disease registry. We start a love relationship and, at first, enjoy our happiness and euphoria.
A storm of feelings and emotions covers us, and critical thinking is completely absent during this wonderful period. It's like we're in a state of drug intoxication. Everything about our loved one seems charming: appearance, voice, and demeanor. And we perceive its shortcomings as an amazing feature - its zest and charm. And here, under the influence of this love intoxication, it would be good not to completely dissolve in your partner, to preserve yourself and not make any fateful decisions.
But... As sooner or later the disease passes, as the effect of any drug ends, so our euphoria gradually fades away. Passions subside, and we begin to see our partner for who he really is. Gradually calming down and getting used to each other, we move directly to building a love relationship.
Options for building a love relationship
A lot has already been written and said about love relationships, the principles of their construction and options for development. There are a huge number of systems, concepts, theories, and each explains the nature of love in its own way and predicts certain situations for us in different periods of relationships.
So, according to psychologists, the most common options for developing relationships are the following:
1. Seven stages of love relationships: the “candy-bouquet” period, satiety, disgust, patience, respect, friendship and, finally, love.
2. Crisis periods of love relationships: the first year of the relationship, and then - three to five years, seven, twelve to fifteen and twenty years. Each period has its own specifics and characteristics, according to which psychologists develop recommendations for partners to overcome difficulties.
There are even more options in Vedic psychology, philosophy and various esoteric teachings. The choice of attitudes that you can focus on when building a love relationship is abundant. However, most often, as practice shows, we act according to certain subconscious principles. Let's look at them.
Principle 1: Parent Pattern
Often we (sometimes without realizing it) are guided by the scenario of our parents’ relationships, which we have observed since childhood. We behave with our partners the same way we did in our family. And this is good if we grew up in a happy family, where parents have been living together in perfect harmony for decades. But it also happens differently...
We can observe a huge number of situations where a girl, raised in a family with a drinking father who did not pay enough attention to her and her mother, subconsciously searches for and finds the same “cold” man, often with addictions, and repeats the experience of her parents.
Situations are no less common where a mother raised her daughter alone all her life, and she, in turn, having matured, gotten married and given birth to a child, soon gets divorced and unknowingly continues the family “tradition.”
There are many similar examples in our lives, and psychology is actively studying them.
Principle 2. Rules of life in society
Guided by this principle, we focus on standards, norms and stereotypes accepted and strengthened in society. Of course, they differ depending on the country of residence, nationality, culture, religion, and so on.
Humanity has developed these rules, consolidating them in its own subconscious, over many centuries. Today, some of them have lost their former power: we increasingly use them at will and do not perceive them as dogma. Others retain their influence, and we continue to be guided by them to this day.
For example, according to a well-known stereotype, the fair half of humanity must get married and have children before the age of 30. Following these principles, a woman whose personal life has not developed by this time will consider herself defective. Or she will be ready to marry even “neighbor Vasya” - just to meet generally accepted standards and join the ranks of married ladies.
On topic: Negative attitudes. How to identify everything at once and remove it forever?
Principle 3. Personal experience and life by your own rules
According to this principle, we focus on ourselves and our own experience. Yes, a personal formula for love relationships, derived by trial and error, also has its place. Such people do not pay attention to anyone and live, focusing only on their past experience. It may sound good, but sometimes it turns into a vicious circle...
Once having experienced the pain of disappointment from a partner's betrayal, a woman can become suspicious and distrustful. In this case, each new man will again and again be forced to prove to her that “he is not such a goat and does not play around.”
Thus, each of us has our own attitudes and principles by which we live and by which we focus. And, of course, your own ways to find love. But they don’t always lead to a happy ending. Sometimes our own beliefs add difficulties and problems to us, creating obstacles in relationships with a partner and darkening the love between a man and a woman.
Both are married: advantages
Secret love relationships can be beneficial if both partners consciously approach the process and do not build hopes that the love affair can develop into something more. If both the lover and the mistress enter into a relationship just to have fun without leaving their families, then you can find its advantages here. For example, partners will notice shortcomings in each other and begin to think about the merits of their legal spouses. After all, in marriage you so often stop noticing the merits of your partner. And when there is someone to compare with, it turns out that the husband (wife) turned out to be the best option.
If the lover is free from marriage, unlike the woman, then their relationship can work out well if the man continues to look for his beloved, and the woman lets him go as soon as he finds his soul mate. Problems may arise in the following situations:
- When a single lover begins to love his married mistress and want to build a serious relationship with her.
- When a married woman does not adequately perceive the news that her lover has decided to leave because he has found his love.
Even better is the secret relationship between two free people who continue to value their freedom. At the same time, they are not deceiving anyone.
Other advantages of a secret relationship are:
- Lack of quarrels due to the fact that lovers rarely see each other and often direct all their energy to sex and having fun together. There are no family values, common interests or even affairs, so the partners have nothing to share.
- The duration of undying feelings, since lovers rarely see each other, they have a limited amount of time, they do not spend it on courtship and long philosophical conversations.
- Ability to work around sharp corners and experience.
- Lack of desire to start a family and take someone away from their legal spouse. At the beginning of a relationship, this usually happens, since both lovers think soberly and do not expect their relationship to become more important than family.
- Present. On the one hand, the mistress begins to receive pleasant surprises, which she has not seen from her husband for a long time. On the other hand, gifts are made exclusively for holidays or inexpensive ones, so as not to arouse suspicion among the legal spouse.
- No chance of getting sick. If both are married, then they must take care not to accidentally infect their partners, who will then understand for sure that they are being cheated on. This means that you can be sure that your lover is healthy in an intimate sense.
- A secret relationship that is maintained if both partners are not interested in disclosing it. This is why married lovers are so good who will not unexpectedly come to visit or send bouquets of flowers home.
- Adrenaline and fresh emotions that are pleasant.
- The ability to break up quickly and without hysterics, because both partners do not lay claim to each other.
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Situations that arise when building a love relationship
Any obstacles in a relationship lead to all sorts of situations. And each situation, depending on our behavior in it, either brings us closer, making relationships stronger and us happier, or separates us, causing pain and suffering.
Our natural state is high vibrations from feelings of joy, gratitude and love. And our task is to strive to stay on these high vibrations as much as possible and slip into low vibrations and suffering as little as possible.
What situations in relationships with a partner make us suffer?
- Feelings of guilt when breaking up a love relationship. It happens that at first everything is fine, and then the loved one suddenly disappears without explaining the reason. But you can’t forget him and blame yourself.
- Fading or regression of relationships
. You have noticed that your man has noticeably cooled towards you, and your relationship seems to have “paused.” A breakup is inevitable, but you don't want to lose it. - He is with you, but does not ask you to marry. In fact, he is with you, but does not recognize your relationship. You feel like you're not good enough, and your self-esteem drops every day. A man does not want or is not ready to take responsibility for your relationship and get married, but you need it like air.
- Mutual grievances and reproaches. You hurt him and, regretting it, you think that he will never forgive you. Or, on the contrary, he offended you, but you just can’t forget and forgive, constantly turning thoughts about it in your head.
- Treason. Your man cheated on you, found someone else, but you still love him and are not ready to let him go.
- Unstable relationships. You constantly come together and separate: it’s hard to be together, and it’s unbearable to be apart, and there is no happiness.
The list of situations that bring us pain can be endless. Facing them and striving for harmony in relationships, we try to fix something. But often we don’t know how and behave like a “bull in a china shop,” only aggravating the situation. And sometimes we lose relationships altogether.
To prevent this from happening, go to a closed meeting with Elizaveta Volkova and find out what you should never do so as not to completely ruin your relationship >>>
How to maintain love in a relationship while working on yourself
The ability to love is an art that requires a special talent, a talent that, alas, is not inherent in every person. This art takes a lifetime to learn, and it is good to learn it in order to maintain love in a relationship. And, often, only in extreme old age can one really see examples of real sincere and deep love, bright and inspiring love. Not everyone has this “pure” feeling, but there is still nothing that a person can learn.
Control of emotions
A person who is first of all in harmony with himself can love. An open, kind, sincere person. The heart of such a person is filled only with positive emotions. Learning to restrain yourself is not as difficult as it seems at first glance. And today, the ability to control oneself is valued much more than mental abilities.
In order to maintain love in a relationship, you need to keep your emotions under control, and you need to keep your thoughts under control. As you know, thoughts are material and this is justified by the law of attraction operating in the universe. This means that the first step in learning to love is the ability to restrain all negative emotions.
Understanding a loved one
The second step is the ability to empathize, understand and support the person who is next to you. Learning this is not so easy. While supporting a person, as a rule, is not a big deal, then again, not everyone can truly understand and penetrate his problems.
And not everyone will decide to shoulder the problems of another person and understand why it is important for him. And so, in order to maintain love in a relationship and learn to love, you need to be understanding about the problems of a person close to you.
And the third, one of the important steps, is the ability to learn and teach. In human relations this comes first. The ability to transmit your knowledge and receive it from others is the highest point of human communication. This ability is necessary in order to learn to love.
The stage of despair when building a love relationship
Sometimes, having lost a stable relationship, we begin to do stupid things, for which we are subsequently very ashamed. So, trying to return our loved one, we can:
- Manipulate and use dirty psychological tricks;
- Try in every possible way to arouse jealousy;
- Pursue, use pleas and persuasion;
- Resort to love spells, conspiracies and other magic.
But none of this works. And even if it gives some effect, it doesn’t last long and, most often, leads to an even more painful situation, to unhappy love. Understand that all this will not bring back your happiness!
But the ineffectiveness of such methods does not mean that it is impossible to return a loved one, restore harmony in a relationship, or get rid of a rival in principle. Can!
There are simply other, more effective ways. And now I will tell you about them. And to make it clearer for you, I will do this using the example of real stories with real people. So, let's go!
Real stories
Story one
Ksenia, “thanks to” a huge number of complexes and fears, attracted separation into her relationship. Realizing her negative thoughts and attitudes, she began to work through them, and her man soon returned.
But the happiness was short-lived. At the very first reunion, Ksenia’s deeper fears, resentments and total lack of self-acceptance surfaced. But she didn't give up. Further, higher-quality and leisurely elaboration of one’s own thinking bore fruit. Ksenia and her man are still together and happy. Watch in this video:
Story two
Svetlana lost her husband, family, financial stability - her life in general. The husband left for another woman, and a real war broke out between the once loving spouses. All this led Svetlana to prolonged depression and, as a result, treatment at a psychoneurological dispensary and work with psychotherapists and psychologists.
The result was zero. Everything was in vain until Svetlana realized that she did not know herself. She doesn’t know what she’s thinking, doesn’t know what she wants... She finally realized that she was building her own reality. How did her story end? Just listen:
Story three
Tamara and her man were actively making plans for the future, dreaming of a family and children. But all his dreams suddenly collapsed when, without explanation, he decided to “take a break” and disappeared. Tamara did not “shed a tear at the window” and took the situation into her own hands.
And then - a month of silence and ignoring from the man. But the end was unexpected, and now the beloved is carrying Tamara in his arms. What happened so magically? Find out here:
Story four
Dasha’s romance with a foreigner began like in a fairy tale: everything was perfect, beautiful and very promising. It would seem that a happy ending is close, but Dasha managed to cool down this love relationship. She lost her man, herself and the meaning of her life for a long time. It could have ended badly. But often, having reached an emotional bottom, we find the strength to push away from it and change everything. See the story of her breakthrough for yourself:
Story five
Maria met her one and only man, but in an instant she practically lost him. The firm belief that he was her soulmate, her future husband and the father of her children, did not allow her to let go of her beloved. She found a way to materialize the desired happy future with the power of thought. Maria talks about this in detail in the video:
If you have watched all the videos, then you probably already understand that any work in a love relationship should start with yourself. We cannot change another person, force him to return to us or leave another person. But we can change ourselves.
Working on yourself is the most effective way to transform the world around you!
The Universe will reflect any of your changes, insights and awareness in the reality around you. It really works. Just try it, and a harmonious love relationship is guaranteed!
On topic: Finding love. We fulfill love wishes
Cons of forbidden fruit
Of course, a secret relationship has its downsides. After all, let’s not forget about the human factor, when partners actually forget who they are to each other and that they have families.
- The first disadvantage is that sometimes partners get carried away. One of the partners may forget that he is already married, so he begins to fall in love with his lover, want to have a family with him, and control him. Well, if these feelings are mutual, then the partner will also be ready to get a divorce in order to start a new family. But it’s bad when it takes only one lover.
- Family destruction. Sometimes you come across people who, through their behavior, despite their marital status, insert themselves into the lives of their partners and try to destroy their families. They are also driven by various feelings that seem to them to be love.
- Unplanned pregnancy. If lovers sleep, then the woman can become pregnant. And it’s bad if she cannot deceive her husband by saying that the child is his. It's even worse if the lover refuses the child. It may turn out that the woman will be left with the child in her arms.
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School "Power in Thought"
If you don’t know where to start working on yourself, take advantage of the experience of those who have already taken this path and who have succeeded. The heroines of the stories I told above fully appreciated the work of the law of reflection in the courses of the “Power in Thought” school. In their reviews of how they created happy love relationships, the girls mention the “Effective program for restoring love relationships” and the “Wish Fulfillment Marathon 2.0.” These are courses where, in a minimum period of time, you can work yourself to the maximum under the guidance of experienced curators and get the desired result in reality.
But if you are not yet ready for such global work on yourself, I recommend attending an open master class on relationships. It's completely free, but no less useful.
What do you think - what or who does your love relationship depend on? Do you create them yourself or does fate determine everything? Share your opinion in the comments.
