How to develop a sense of humor - exercises from Alexey Zorin

A sense of humor - what is it, a gift or a skill. How to develop and how to improve.

The ability to recognize the comical in the world around us, react with joy to the jokes of others, and look with optimism at the present and future not only improves the quality of life, but also prolongs it.

It is worth noting that people with a sense of humor get used to new housing and work more quickly and comfortably, travel happily and enjoy life. Depression, nervous breakdowns, and even basic quarrels occur much less frequently in such people.

How to develop a good sense of humor

Note that a sense of humor, optimism, a positive outlook on life - all these qualities can be developed in yourself or your child. It’s not in vain that the phrase “Everything is in your hands” is used! Because the quality of our life depends only on us. Do you want to learn exercises to develop a sense of humor and see the world in a new way?

Do you want to instill in your child a sense of humor and joy in life from a young age? Then this article is what you need. It discusses in detail how to properly develop a sense of humor, as well as only fun and effective exercises to achieve your goal.

Living with a sense of humor is easier!

Is it possible to learn the art of jokes?

For some people, the ability to make good jokes is a natural gift. Often they are the ones who quickly become the life of the party and in life more easily reach great heights. If you do not belong to this category of lucky people, do not be upset and give up. There is good news for you - a sense of humor can and should be developed!

Numerous studies have proven that there is a genetic predisposition to see funny things around and wittyly share your observations with others. In particular, according to results published in the popular Medical Daily, the 5-HTTLPR gene has a great influence on this process.

At the same time, modern psychologists have found that the older a person gets, the more his ability to joke depends on himself and his living environment. After all, the sense of humor changes as we grow older and our thought processes become more complex. Therefore, the desire to develop it is a very real task!

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Why is it important to work on developing a sense of humor?

By improving our ability to joke, we strengthen the immune system of the psyche. This is the most important function of this feeling - therapeutic. By putting things through a humorous filter, you can protect yourself from excessive stress, major shocks or disappointments, and depression. In addition to this function, there are several other important functions:

• Cognitive. Humor helps you painlessly perceive reality as it is. It is the optimal means of mastering ideas about the world around us and prevents the emergence of hasty subjective conclusions.
• Educational. A healthy ability to joke helps to gently but firmly instruct children. It's also interesting that the fear of being ridiculed often stops people from doing bad things.
• Entertaining. Humor helps induce relaxation and laughter and lifts your mood. This is an important communication tool that helps to convey joy and positive emotions to each other.
• Regulatory. A good joke can help change the flow of a conversation. Depending on the situation, it will allow you to direct it in a positive direction, correctly interrupt an unpleasant discussion and prevent a brewing conflict.

What is the phenomenon of humor?

There is an opinion that a sense of humor is given by nature and cannot be learned. But any normal person, if desired, can learn to draw or play musical instruments. Also with a sense of humor: it needs to be developed. How to learn a sense of humor?

Humor is an important phenomenon in our personal and professional lives. It helps to find solutions, overcome communication difficulties, and maintain mental health during times of stress. Laughter caused by a good joke brings people together, promotes trust and even harmonizes conflicts in relationships. At the same time, humor in all its forms (sarcastic, witty, ironic, satirical, black, cynical) is complex and developed, like a language.

A sense of humor is both personal and personal, but it is also something that connects us to others like nothing else. A woman or girl is delighted with a man who is fun to be with when he can make a cool joke. A man prefers a woman who laughs at his jokes.

It is common knowledge that popular requests on dating sites are to find potential partners with a sense of humor. The fact that women laugh more than men suggests that some instinct is involved. But whatever the roots of this feminine instinct, it works - men find women attractive when they laugh. Perhaps this is because laughter unconsciously signals interest and pleasure.

On the one hand, the purpose of humor is biological (as a way to find a partner), but it can also be an indicator of emotional intelligence. In fact, evolutionary psychology suggests that a sense of humor reflects a person's intelligence.

Most would probably agree that those with a good sense of humor tend to be creative and cognitive people. They are able to look at life through a different lens and can appreciate its irony and absurdity. A good sense of humor has been proven to have many social benefits, so it's worth it.

How to learn to joke well - the main characteristics of humor:

• View from the outside. Humor leads to observation of the world, of one's words and actions. We can laugh at ourselves, at others, at the situation if we are capable of some form of detachment. And that's okay. Much of humor comes from awareness, and if you are willing to be open-minded to correctly perceive what is around us, you can turn it into something funny.

In many cases, humor can be an outlet to overcome unbearable moments. Then they talk about the “politeness of despair” - to laugh so as not to cry, as the French comedian Pierre Desproges, a cancer patient, was able to joke about cancer on stage.

• Complicity. Humor cannot exist without it, that is, without sharing a common belief system. This does not mean that the interlocutors know each other, but their communication implies a minimum of common knowledge and values. To plunge into the world of fun together, you need a common desire to laugh together, to share a moment of humorous pleasure. If there is no complicity or the company is too serious, the joke will fail and will not be understood.
• Inconsistency. The main driving force of humor, which means the simultaneous or very close in time presence of elements that are incompatible or contradictory to each other. Laughter or smiling is caused by this conflict - between what we expected and what we encountered. The humorous effect works better if there is an element of surprise.
• The boundaries of humor. Some comedians believe there are limits to what can be witty jokes, while others say if we value freedom of speech, no topic should be taboo.

Yes, what society considered acceptable just a few years ago—homophobic, racist, sexist, macho jokes—is no longer acceptable. As the late Pierre Desproges said: “We can laugh at everyone, but not at anyone.” Humor can be reclassified as harassment with appropriate penalties. In the US, there is already extensive case law regarding violations of the law (Equal Employment Opportunity Commission).

Basic principles for constructing jokes

Before you begin exercises to develop a sense of humor, it is worth understanding the basics of constructing successful jokes. These five basic patterns will allow you to begin to notice phenomena and events that can become an appropriate reason for laughter. After studying them, you will understand that developing a sense of humor is not a difficult and interesting process!

Why be able to joke?

At first glance, it seems that a sense of humor is not a necessary skill in everyday life. It is enough to be purposeful, responsive, have a broad outlook, and life will improve on its own.

This opinion is easily refuted: a person presents a sad spectacle without a sense of humor. This is especially true for men who cannot carry on a conversation with a lady, but at the same time have a strange touch of humor.

Let's figure out why it's so important to be able to joke correctly:

1. The life of every person is so monotonous that fleeting jokes allow you to forget about pressing problems and feel carefree.
2. When communicating with a girl, it is extremely important for a man to joke skillfully: this way you can brighten up awkward pauses in the conversation.
3. People who know how to humor are accepted in society much faster.
4. boring girls either: it is not at all necessary to specifically develop this trait; it will be enough to treat your own life with a positive attitude.

Another indisputable fact is that laughter prolongs life. Therefore, the development of this quality is necessary in order to have fun communicating with friends, girls, boys, parents and children.

Many more people are drawn to a person with humor than to a boring person.

Under what circumstances should you definitely not joke?

Much of the effect of a joke depends on the circumstances in which it was voiced. You should not use your sense of humor when tragedies or disasters occur nearby. An obvious desire to emphasize one's superiority or to cause offense through humor is a bad idea.

Attempts to make jokes on religious or political topics also have questionable success. They can only make the audience laugh if everyone present is clearly united by the same interests.

Interesting Facts

• According to statistics, a five-year-old child laughs more than three hundred times a day, while an adult laughs about twenty.
• People who are about to watch a comedy film have three times more levels of growth hormone and beta-endorphin than those who pick up a political newspaper or turn on the news on TV.
• A doctor at the University of Rochester School of Medicine has identified the area of ​​the brain that is responsible for a sense of humor. According to researcher Dina Shibata, this location is located in the lower part of the frontal lobe. This is why, after microstrokes concentrated in this part of the head, the understanding of jokes sometimes completely disappears.
• Those who like to laugh look younger, because when smiling, about 15 facial muscles are activated and blood flows.
• Laughter strengthens the immune system. This conclusion was reached by scientists who were able to study changes in the saliva of laughing patients. As it turned out, after laughing, saliva has tens of times more protective bacteria than in a calm person.
• Smiles relieve pain. It has been proven that sincere grins increase the pain threshold.

Exercises for effectively developing a sense of humor

To better understand how to develop a sense of humor, use exercises. Problems will be especially useful for developing associative thinking and imagination. If an exercise doesn't work out for you, move on to the next one temporarily. Be sure to come back later and try again! Persistence is the key to intellectual growth and the ability to look at a situation from different angles, which helps you notice the funny. This is what will help you successfully cope with such a task as developing a sense of humor.

Endings in sentences

An interesting exercise, often used in the popular game "KVN" as a warm-up. The point is to come up with witty and comic endings to sentences.

original name

Open funny photos in a search engine. Practice coming up with bright and comical names for them.

Crazy offer

Choose any letter of the alphabet, and then make a sentence in which each word begins with it. There should be at least 10-12 words.

Association games

Instill in yourself the habit of quickly coming up with several associations for a certain word. You can also supplement this exercise with the opposite action - a selection of concepts that are distant (and even absurd) in meaning.

Polysemy of words

Pay attention to the different meanings of the same words, as well as to different concepts that reflect the essence of the same thing. Learn modern slang.

Purpose of the item

Look around and focus on one object (table, box, closet, dishes, etc.). Think about how funny it can be used for other purposes.

Search for similar characteristics

Choose two completely unrelated and different concepts. For example, let it be “hippopotamus” and “chair”. Now turn on your imagination and think about how they are similar and how they can be interconnected.

When and how to joke?

Humor should not only be funny, but also be appropriate to the situation. It is known that the best joke is the one that came at the right moment. With its help, you can defuse a tense situation or support a person who is ready to give up. Therefore, you need to correctly assess the situation, because it happens that humor is completely inappropriate, and sometimes downright offensive.

You cannot laugh at injury or illness, at disasters, at the misfortunes of others, you should not offend people’s religious feelings or ridicule a weak person who cannot find a worthy answer.

The wonderful properties of humor are that it makes people better and encourages them to unite, and offensive jokes are just slander that speaks of a person’s callousness and his inability to understand others.

Read further: The process of social development of personality

A person trying to develop a sense of humor must be prepared for the fact that he himself will become the object of someone’s jokes. An integral feature of all comedians is the ability to laugh at themselves. In addition, you need to be able to appreciate not only your own jokes, but also those of others - this is the only way to fully learn the art of making others laugh.

Tips for effectively developing a sense of humor and wit

1. Try to find a reason to be happy and smile every morning. Spend 5-10 minutes deliberately thinking about reasons for happiness and laughter. Starting a new day with positive emotions and humor, you will quickly develop the habit of approaching everything with a sense of humor.
2. Expand your vocabulary by reading books and watching educational videos. Pay attention to the classics of the humorous genre (B. Shaw, O. Henry, A. Chekhov, etc.). By becoming more well-read and erudite, you will be able to react faster to what is happening and describe it more eloquently. You will be able to support any conversation and choose the appropriate witty joke for any environment.
3. Follow new performances of your favorite comedians and study their style. Select a few well-known comedians and regularly watch their new performances, analyzing the features of their approach. Write down the techniques and jokes you like in a separate notebook. First, practice creating something similar to them. Over time, you can develop your own style based on elements of their experience and personal additions.
4. Work on your self-esteem. Often a person mentally comes up with funny comments for what is happening and witty jokes, but is afraid to voice them. In this case, it is important to work on self-esteem and self-confidence. Contact a psychologist or attend a personal growth training.

Features of children's humor

Every parent wants their child to shine in society with sparkling humor over time. Not all adults know how to develop a sense of humor. This is even more difficult to do in children, it seems at first glance. In fact, for attentive parents, there is no simpler task than to develop a sense of humor in a child. To do this, you should adhere to a few simple but mandatory rules:

• Up to a year old babies are cheered by the mood of their parents. A couple of funny faces from mom and dad a day will bring a joyful smile.
• At 2-3 years old, humorous activities will require physical exercise. Sudden appearances from behind shelters, games of hide and seek (even with face palms), awkward movements with facial expressions are just what you need. But it’s time to develop more complex skills - speech. Rhymes, incorrect words and the good mood of the parents in addition will give the lessons the right direction, and the child will begin to sparkle with such expressions even with himself. Adult jokes that are not yet understood will have to be explained.
• At 3-5 years old, pictures with mixed up possibilities and various confusions become funny. At this age, on the one hand, it is worth supporting the child’s intentions to make him laugh; on the other hand, it can be useful to point out that a joke repeated many times ceases to be funny.

What a pleasant feeling when a child with a sly squint makes a subtle, funny observation from which those around him can derive outright pleasure. Support and example will make up for the lack of a sense of humor at first, you should be patient.

A sense of humor is largely a product of upbringing and social environment. Therefore, even those who previously lacked it can achieve the desired results by working on themselves.

What makes a joke a good joke

The humor follows a pattern. In many ways it is mathematical in structure and rhythm. How to learn humor and wit? Analyze why certain comedy shows, skits, or jokes entertain you more. You will begin to realize that you can create a personal style of humor.

The basic rules of a joke are timing, rhythm, the rule of three and material.

• The first is related to the moment when you tell a joke. To tell your miniature story, which is a joke, you need the undivided attention of your listeners. Just because it's not successful doesn't mean it's not funny. It may have been made at an inopportune time or the setting was inappropriate: the anecdote may not make sense in certain situations. The more optimal the situation, the greater the likelihood of success in the punchline of the joke. In addition, a person who is just learning to joke may be verbose or, conversely, miss important descriptive details by joking too quickly. Both extremes should be avoided!
• Every joke has a rhythm. It is measured not so much in words as in the time it takes to tell it. Some written jokes may seem too long, but when told they are rhythmically short. It's the way you pronounce words, the pauses between lines, the physical gestures that allow the audience to visualize the story and ultimately laugh. The more you practice telling anecdotes or jokes and refine your phrasing, the more refined this rhythm becomes.
• The rule of three is the joke; necessary condition. This is a setup consisting of two components that are necessary to build the scheme of the joke. The punchline, aka the punchline of the joke; is in the third line when a deviation from the scheme occurs. The climax is short, sometimes one word. If she violates the boundaries, then the joke turns out to be verbose, long, uninteresting, like an ordinary conversation. The delivery of the climax affects the audience's reaction, so it's better to make it big - to create anticipation.
• Material – The number of jokes in your repertoire is of fundamental importance. This helps to understand the above rules and whether certain jokes are suitable for certain thematic categories and, accordingly, situations.

How to learn to joke in any situation? Start learning to be humorous by classifying jokes by rhythm and theme. Say the joke out loud (preferably on a recorder), remembering to focus on the rhythm. After repeating several times, do the exercise with another joke. Compare them. You will definitely notice the difference between the rhythms (fast, slow or in between). Moving into thematic categories, use the same jokes you chose for rhythm analysis and ask yourself, “What is this joke about?” and assign a category to it.