“He doesn’t understand me at all!” How to preserve love if partners have different...

Compatibility of temperaments of choleric, sanguine, melancholic, phlegmatic: work, friendship, love

Compatibility of temperaments
As you probably already understood, absolutely all character traits, to one degree or another, influence a person’s behavior. This is why sometimes close and dear people stop understanding each other and begin to quarrel regularly. The most unpleasant thing in this situation is that there are character traits that even with a strong desire cannot be changed.

In view of this, if you want to avoid minor omissions, then try to determine what type of character the person close to you belongs to and, if possible, try not to commit actions that will obviously upset him.

Temperament compatibility:

• Choleric. At work, people with this temperament are better off making friends with sanguine people. Since they are also quite energetic, together they will be able to achieve all their goals quite quickly. As for friendship and love, it is best for such people to only let phlegmatic people close to them. The latter have a fairly calm and balanced character, thanks to which they can gently cool down the ardor of a choleric person at the right time.

• Sanguine. In principle, a sanguine person, if desired, can get along with any person. His ability to adapt to new circumstances gives him the opportunity to fruitfully cooperate and make friends with both choleric and melancholic people. The only area of ​​life in which he is not ready to give in is romantic relationships. That is why men and women with such a temperament do not get along with stubborn and conservative phlegmatic people.

• Melancholic . The best ally of a melancholic person at home and at work can be a sociable and energetic sanguine person who will listen and lend a helping hand at the right moment. Also, a melancholic person can communicate quite calmly with a phlegmatic person. The latter's slowness and calmness will have a positive effect on the hypochondriac, thereby helping to ensure that he does not commit rash acts.

• Phlegmatic . The best ally at home and at work for people with a similar temperament are melancholic people. With their softness and sensitivity, they transform a cold-blooded phlegmatic person into a person who is ready to move mountains for the sake of a loved one.

COMPATIBILITY OF TEMPERAMENTS OF DIFFERENT TYPES

This article should not be used canonically. Compatibility of temperament types is best only if people have common interests. Each case is individual, what will be described here are only average values. Moreover, temperament in itself cannot influence relationships between people. Let's not forget that this is only the foundation on which other personality traits are built. Therefore, you should not believe the descriptions. They can only help a little in the difficult task of determining your compatibility with another person.

Compatibility of a choleric person with a sanguine person

Compatibility of a choleric person with a sanguine person
The union of a choleric person and a sanguine person almost always brings very good results. A choleric person with a strong character often lacks the strength to complete what he started, and if during this period a sanguine person happens to be near him, he will bring all his ideas to life in the shortest possible time. In addition, people with this character can come together based on common interests or hobbies.

While doing what they love together, they will be able to forget for a while that they both have a fairly purposeful character, which periodically leads to the fact that they begin to fight for the palm. The most unpleasant thing is that if the choleric person does not learn to give in to the sanguine person, then their friendship will end quite quickly and in the end they will become sworn enemies who will always look for a reason to annoy each other as much as possible.

Maintaining a couple's relationship

Even phlegmatic people's patience runs out sooner or later. Choleric people should not forget this. If the topic of the dispute is fundamental for a balanced and tolerant person in all other respects, then it is better for a violent choleric person to give up and not insist, as he may stumble upon a solid wall of stubbornness. Reluctance to concede will only lead to a protracted conflict.

Knowing the character of your partner and his temperament, be more tolerant of the phlegmatic person’s leisurely behavior; do not blame him for his slowness. After all, he is not able to complete the work at the same pace as a high-speed choleric person. He will definitely cope with it and will bring what he started to a successful end without your attempts to speed up the process.

Compatibility of a choleric person with a melancholic person

Compatibility of a choleric person with a melancholic person
Choleric people, as a rule, are very hot-tempered, impatient and straightforward. And it is these character traits that most frighten timid and suspicious melancholic people. For this reason, the union of people with similar temperaments in real life is almost impossible. Yes, they can try to be friends or live together, but due to their completely polar characters, they will constantly have rather violent showdowns, from which the persistent and hot-tempered choleric will always emerge victorious.

The melancholic person in such an alliance is assigned the role of a victim, who will always have to agree with the opinion of her opponent. True, if a melancholic person is lucky and meets an unforgiving choleric person, then it is likely that they will be able to coexist quite tolerably together. Also, such an alliance is possible if the choleric person tries to slightly curb his excessive straightforwardness and demandingness, and simply protects the melancholic person from all sorts of troubles. In this case, being able to feel strong and needed can make a person more gentle and patient.

RELATIONSHIP WITH CHOLERICA

This type is quite complex in terms of relationships. Moreover, this complexity is expressed not only in incompatible types, but also in relation to people who have the same type. If the other person is of the same type, then this can lead to a conflict over the zone of influence, since control over the situation is often important to choleric people.

Choleric people treat sanguine people quite normally. After all, both types are often extroverted. But the best combination is between choleric people and phlegmatic people. They, as the most inert type, are perfectly stimulated by choleric people to activity.

Phlegmatic people themselves relax choleric people and prevent them from completely abandoning their main activity or going crazy. In the choleric type, the incompatibility of temperaments is most manifested with melancholics due to the strength of the first type and the weakness of the latter type.

Compatibility of a choleric person with a phlegmatic person

Compatibility of a choleric person with a phlegmatic person
A union of people with similar types of temperament can be called ideal only if the phlegmatic person is responsible for the more routine and responsible part of the relationship. In this case, the choleric person will be the generator of ideas, and the phlegmatic person will be the person responsible for their implementation.

But, in general, it is better that in such an alliance it is the phlegmatic who holds the reins of power; his equanimity, prudence and consistency will slightly restrain the impatience and incontinence of the choleric person, and as a result he will begin to react less sharply to external stimuli.

If such an alliance lasts for a long time, then it is likely that people with similar characters will be able to build very warm and trusting relationships that no major quarrel can destroy.

Compatibility of choleric and phlegmatic people

Such a couple in marriage is most prosperous due to the balance of one of the partners. Regardless of whether the choleric person is a woman or a man, their temper and excitability are perfectly compensated by the patience and peacefulness of the second spouse in the couple. The love compatibility of a phlegmatic person and a choleric person has a beneficial effect on family relationships.

As everyone knows, opposites attract. In such a couple, family or love relationships can become strong and long-lasting. According to statistics, such partners show love and mutual attraction in relationships; complete breaks and quarrels rarely occur. The life of a phlegmatic person is brightened up by the brightness and activity of a choleric person. The activity of one does not allow the other to get bored. But in the marriage of a choleric person and a phlegmatic person there are also many disagreements that you need to be able to cope with. Both one and the other partner must be prepared for this in order to preserve the family or friendship.

Compatibility of a sanguine person with a melancholic person

Compatibility of a sanguine person with a melancholic person
You have probably heard more than once the folk wisdom that two cardinal opposites attract. The same can be said about the union of a sanguine person and a melancholic person. As practice shows, two people with completely different temperaments feel quite good together. Thanks to the fact that a melancholic person knows how to shut up and step aside in time, a sanguine person in all life situations feels that he is right and this gives him confidence that a loved one understands him very well.

But this state of affairs does not mean at all that the main thing in such a union is the sanguine person. Since, due to his temperament, he does not know how to correctly express his feelings, most often it is the melancholic person who helps him develop this character trait. And precisely because two similar people are able to complement each other quite unobtrusively, their union always turns out to be very strong, and all of the above applies to both friends and married couples.

Who can get along with whom?

Causes of conflicts - the main factors that can influence this

In order not to make mistakes in relationships, you should take into account the compatibility of temperaments in love.

1. It is more difficult for an impulsive choleric person to establish permanent relationships and regular sexual intercourse:

• In a pair of choleric and melancholic people, interesting and passionate compatibility is possible, but since both temperaments have leadership qualities, it is unrealistic to make a joint decision;
• In a union between a choleric person and a melancholic person, compatibility is very difficult, since a hot-tempered choleric person often offends a worried melancholic person;
• In a couple, a choleric person and a phlegmatic person have good compatibility: a calm and measured phlegmatic person “cools down” the hot choleric person, and the relationship in bed for such a couple is especially harmonious.

1. A sanguine person easily makes connections, but it is not advisable to set a wedding date with him because of his unreliability:

• A sanguine person and a choleric person are difficult compatibility, since their temperaments have similar emotionality and psychosexuality, bright and cheerful relationships are possible, but the struggle for leadership between husband and wife is inevitable;
• The relationship with a melancholic person is favorable and strong, who will happily transfer all the problems of choice to the choleric person; in the love sphere, this couple harmoniously complements each other;
• It is very difficult to build friendships and relationships with a phlegmatic person, since he values ​​obligations and demands the fulfillment of promises, which a sanguine person does not tolerate.

1. It is difficult for a sincere, but touchy and vulnerable melancholic person to find a mate:

• Communication with a choleric person exacerbates the syndrome of anxious anticipation of failure; the choleric person’s temper and irritability are poorly tolerated by a mild melancholic person;
• A very harmonious relationship is formed with a sanguine person, based on mutual support;
• Communication with a phlegmatic person is smooth and serene, sometimes even completely indifferent, which suits both parties quite well.

1. A calm and unshakable phlegmatic person values ​​guarantees and strength:

• With a choleric person he builds a warm relationship based on trust and calmness, although the unbridledness of the latter periodically tires the phlegmatic person;
• The connection with a sanguine person is ambiguous, since his frivolity and variability irritate the stubborn and conservative phlegmatic person and vice versa;
• A family with a melancholic person will be calm, homely and cozy; in such a union, a phlegmatic person gets along well with an inert and pessimistic melancholic person.

Since temperaments in their pure form are rare, it becomes clear why not all recommendations are ideal for every person.

Different temperaments

Compatibility of a sanguine person with a phlegmatic person

Compatibility of a sanguine person with a phlegmatic person
At first glance, it may seem that the determination and sometimes excessive initiative of sanguine people does not fit in any way with the calm and balanced character of phlegmatic people. But in practice, this combination gives a very good result. If these two people meet, they usually remain faithful to each other for the rest of their lives. If they have any quarrels or misunderstandings, they always find the strength to discuss the current situation.

The only stumbling block in such relationships is the intolerance of criticism by phlegmatic people, so if a sanguine person tries to directly point out mistakes to a loved one, then most likely he will be offended by him. In view of this, if you want to avoid any complications in the relationship, then try to give criticism in minimal portions. As for dominance, in such couples the sanguine person almost always dominates, while the phlegmatic person tries to remain in a secondary role.

Marriage of two phlegmatic people

A couple of phlegmatic people, according to statistics, are very stable in relationships, but you won’t find bright passion in them. Each of them does his own thing. They are laconic and therefore conflicts rarely arise between them. However, if they do not agree on any issue, then the quarrel can drag on for a long period. Such partners rarely come to an agreement, they can hold a grudge for a long time, and even break up due to disagreements. In this case, even their children together do not hold them back.

However, let’s return to the compatibility of choleric and phlegmatic people in marriage. Let's see what pitfalls interfere with the well-being of such partners in the family.

Compatibility of a melancholic person with a phlegmatic person

Compatibility of a melancholic person with a phlegmatic person
Melancholic people by nature are very timid, shy and suspicious, therefore they feel completely free with reliable and calm phlegmatic people. If people with such temperaments form a couple, then their union looks ideal from the outside, especially if the woman has a melancholic character. The man next to her feels like a real ruler of the world, because every day she admires how quickly he solves all problems.

True, even in such an alliance, minor quarrels may periodically arise. Most often, they appear due to the fact that a melancholic person simply cannot understand what mood his loved one is in at the moment and, for example, when he, tired, comes home from work and offers him a walk or a visit. The most unpleasant thing in this situation is that the phlegmatic person, getting angry, does not even understand that the reason for this behavior of the melancholic person is his inability to show his emotions to others.

Two choleric people - compatibility: description

Two choleric people - compatibility
Some people associate choleric people with a kind of time bomb that explodes at the most inopportune moment. Such people are very hot-tempered, impatient, overly persistent and demanding, so if two choleric people live under the same roof, then minor quarrels occur every day. But still, one should not think that men and women with such a character cannot have anything in common.

If they have common interests, then they will be able to communicate normally quite easily. As practice shows, two choleric people can make wonderful friends who value their relationships. But they rarely make married couples, and this is due to their explosive and unpredictable nature. Due to the fact that choleric people do not know how to restrain negative emotions, scandals in such a family occur with enviable regularity, and in the end everyone remains unconvinced.

Partners have different temperaments: what to do?

People in relationships gradually accumulate grievances and claims against each other. What to do so that different temperaments do not become a death sentence for love? Follow these simple guidelines:

1. Focus on what you enjoy about your second half. Each temperament type has its own strengths. Phlegmatic people are good housekeepers, they are faithful and devoted, choleric people are unpredictable and passionate. Melancholic people, like no one else, know how to create romance and support their lover, and with sanguine people you will never be bored or sad.
2. Talk to each other. Is there something you're not happy with? Don't accumulate dissatisfaction. Instead, talk calmly with your loved one. Explain what upsets you in his actions, what you would like to receive. Find a compromise. Read the article about the rules of an ideal marriage to understand how to maintain love in difficult situations.
3. Learn from your partner. Does your spouse think differently than you? This is a great way to learn to see another point of view! Opposites complement and strengthen each other, compensating for weaknesses. For example, next to a happy sanguine person, a melancholic person can increase self-esteem. When paired with a choleric person, the phlegmatic person will become more social and learn to enjoy an active lifestyle.

Temperament is established in childhood. But this does not mean that you cannot work with him. Develop, improve, and the Pavel Rakov Training Center will help you with this. Choose interesting courses, take them online or offline. You will learn to understand yourself and your partner, be able to build harmonious relationships, and effectively resolve conflicts.

Two sanguine people - compatibility: description

Two sanguine people - compatibility
Sanguine people by nature are very pleasant people to talk to. They easily make contact even with those people whom they see for the first time in their lives. Their sociability, optimism and energy help them find the positive in everything and move towards their goals as quickly as possible. Such people will never criticize or say nasty things behind your back.

If they see that a person has made a mistake, they will try to point it out as tactfully as possible and even help correct all the consequences of a rash step. In view of all this, we can say that the union of a sanguine person and a sanguine person is simply doomed to exist for a long time. Due to their character, they will support each other in any situation, and they will do this even knowing that their loved one is a little wrong.

Two melancholic people - compatibility: description

Two melancholic people - compatibility
A melancholic person is a deep pessimist who almost always exaggerates his grievances and problems. Now imagine that two such people will be friends or live together. As a rule, if two melancholic people get together, they simply complain to each other about their problems. At first they may even like it, but over time they begin to notice that their opponent, instead of supporting them, is trying to prove that his life is much worse.

Usually it is on this basis that melancholic people have omissions, as a result of which their friendship falls apart. Indirectly, this course of events is also facilitated by the fact that melancholic people, at the slightest stress, become depressed and simply begin to go with the flow.

Two phlegmatic people - compatibility: description

Two phlegmatic people - compatibility
Phlegmatic people are considered the most stress-resistant people because they remain calm in any difficult situations and almost never panic. Some people consider such people to be too cold and unemotional. But in fact, phlegmatic people know how to love and make friends, they just show their real feelings only to the closest and dearest people. For all their slowness, they almost always achieve their goals, although sometimes it takes a lot of time.

Phlegmatic people first think carefully about all their subsequent actions and only after that they begin to take some measures. This character trait allows them not to make mistakes that lead to minor quarrels and major scandals. It is thanks to this trait that two phlegmatic people can quite calmly coexist together sometimes, helping each other with advice or actions.

Who is better for a choleric person to be with?

Compatibility of a choleric person
I would like to say right away that it will be very difficult for a person with any temperament to get along with a choleric person. Since these people are very unpredictable and often unreasonably aggressive, even very patient and calm people will not be able to stay close to such an individual for a long time.

In everyday life, sanguine people are considered the most acceptable allies for choleric people. Since they know how to adapt to the prevailing circumstances, they manage to smooth out all the sharp corners of such an alliance. Moreover, it is sanguine people who are able to find the right words and calm choleric people. As for compatibility with the two remaining types of temperament, everything is much more complicated.

Cholerics get close to phlegmatic people, but, as a rule, they do not have a strong union. The main reason in this case is the excessive calmness of phlegmatic people. The fact that they are unable to give them a worthy emotional response greatly irritates choleric people and in the end they simply break off the relationship. But an alliance with melancholic people is impossible in general. No matter how hard a choleric person tries, he cannot tolerate the inertia of a loved one for long.

Division into types

The conclusion about the compatibility of a choleric person and a phlegmatic person can be drawn from the list of the main characteristics of each type of temperament.

In total, 4 types of excitation and inhibition processes, that is, temperament, were discovered:

1. Choleric - the excitability of the nervous system is off the charts. Such people are nervous, active, impulsive and aggressive. They are characterized by lack of restraint and loudness, sudden transitions from anger to laughter, they do not like to wait and are intolerant of the slowness of others. They are easily recognized by their fast speech, active emotional facial expressions, and sudden movements. This is the most excitable type.

• A sanguine person is calmer than the first type; he is quickly excitable, but also quickly knows how to stop. Characterized by activity and cheerfulness. However, in the absence of exercise, he becomes passive and lethargic. This type of people is not too sad over trifles and quickly changes both hobbies and type of activity. He is loved by the team, he is successful in family relationships.
• Phlegmatic - possesses inertia and balance. People with this type of temperament are quiet, peaceful, resistant to irritants, but persistent, patient and efficient. Despite their slowness, they get things done and you can always rely on them in a difficult situation. They are reliable both in friendship and in marriage.
• Melancholic people are the weakest type of NS. People with such excitability are prone to anxiety and lack of confidence in their abilities. They are touchy and passive, fearful and very emotional. Their speech is quiet and their movements are slow. This type is uninitiative and inert. He is poorly able to adapt to the conditions of life around him, however, he has highly developed associative thinking. He often lives in his inner world.

Who is better for a sanguine person to be with?

Compatibility of a sanguine person
As mentioned above, a sanguine person, thanks to his natural ability to adapt, will be able to get along with any person. Such people radiate optimism in any life situation, so they easily manage not to notice the character flaws of the person next to them. But if you think that they don’t see them, then you are deeply mistaken. Sanguine people understand perfectly well what negative qualities their loved one has; simply because of their peace-loving nature, they try not to run away from the person towards whom they have the warmest feelings.

But still, such people also have their own red line. He does not accept excessive anger, envy and imbalance, so, for example, it is unlikely to get along with a choleric person. Melancholic and phlegmatic people are more suitable for them because, despite all their disadvantages, they still know how to value those who are close to them.

Marriages of two choleric people

If you take a couple with the same type of temperament, for example, two choleric people, then there will be constant screaming and arguing in the family, sometimes leading to physical violence. Neither partner is capable of giving in to the other; each wants primacy and leadership in the family. Reluctance to concede on controversial issues aggravates the situation, conflicts flare up more and more.

If the love of choleric people and phlegmatic people is more or less stable, then a pair of two choleric people can be called an “explosive mixture.” The explosions of emotions simply go off scale, turning into breaking dishes and assault. But even in such relationships a compromise can be found. For stability and well-being in the family, psychologists recommend separating responsibilities and not engaging in one type of activity. This will not cause competition or envy of the other partner’s success, which can be observed in many couples of Hollywood actors. Most successful people have an explosive nature, and the success of one partner in a couple causes negativity in the other, who is unable to contain his emotions.

For peace in the family, it is recommended that partners take breaks in the relationship, for example, resting apart for a while. You also need to often give rest from two choleric patients to relatives and children by going to a resort together. Not only they suffer from the violent temperament of spouses, but also those living with them under the same roof.

Who is better for a melancholic person to be with?

Compatibility of a melancholic person
Melancholic people are very vulnerable people who love peace and quiet. Emotional stability is important to them, so loud, always scandalous people simply scare them. It is for this reason that it will be very difficult for a melancholic person to coexist next to a choleric person. People with such an impulsive character, as a rule, always try to prove that they are right with the help of a scandal, and this contributes to the fact that the melancholic person closes in on himself and becomes depressed. The best option for a melancholic person is sanguine people.

Unlike choleric people, they know how to listen patiently and lend a shoulder at the right moment. Also, a melancholic person can get along with a phlegmatic person. True, such a union will also not be cloudless, since the latter does not know how to openly express his feelings, then from time to time this character trait will irritate a melancholic person and minor quarrels will arise on this basis.

Who is better for a phlegmatic person to be with?

Phlegmatic Compatibility
The distinctive features of phlegmatic people are calmness, seriousness and concentration. They try to build their life so that there is no negativity in it at all. Therefore, if a person who is next to them begins to make a loud scandal, then they try to do everything to ensure that the conflict ends as quickly as possible. In view of this, the most unacceptable union for such people is choleric people.

Their impulsiveness and harshness will greatly irritate phlegmatic people, and they will try to distance themselves as far as possible from the unpredictable person. Cheerful and open sanguine people are most suitable for phlegmatic people. They will constantly push phlegmatic people to take active action, thereby winning them over even more.

Features of a choleric woman

If there is a choleric woman in the family, beware of sloppy household members! Her children will walk “in a line,” and her husband will not allow his socks to stand up in the corner. It’s hard for such women in the family, but it’s even worse for the men who are next to them. It is extremely difficult to communicate in such a couple, since any “showdown” is reminiscent of an Italian family.

Therefore, compatibility between a choleric person and a choleric person in a family is almost impossible. There will be constant disputes, conflicts, struggles for power and authority.

But at work, such women are respected, although not without gossip and weaving intrigues behind their backs. They are excellent at distributing tasks in order to effectively solve the problem and organize the work clearly and quickly.