We continue to find out what subconscious attitudes prevent traders from making good money. In the first part, we dealt with five blocks of the subconscious, including the fear of a new life, which begins with the arrival of big money, and the shame of success. But these blocks are secondary in nature. They are based on deep stereotypes driven into the subconscious by the habit of demonizing money. If you grew up in an environment where money was considered evil, and rich people were considered bearers of negative character traits (or even “thieves and bandits”), your subconscious is already infected with this mental virus. So another piece of advice...
Stop demonizing money
A negative attitude towards money is a psychological defense for poor people who do not see prospects for increasing their well-being. Realizing that you will have to be content with little all your life is very difficult. Therefore, all kinds of self-consolation are used: “but we are honest”, “money spoils a person”, “with righteous labors you cannot build stone chambers”, etc. This phenomenon is not new, as folk proverbs and fairy tales say. And therefore, it is especially difficult to fight stereotypes that have been passed down from generation to generation.
Traders face the fact that trading is most heavily demonized, especially in Russia. The expressions “huckster” and “ooh, speculator!” are still in use today. The trader is not expected to create anything or bring any benefit. What is the opposite of this approach?
It's simple: you need to realize that you are moving the economy. Working on large trading platforms like CME, you participate in global pricing processes and make the wheel of the world economy spin more intensely.
For this you receive a reward. Will it make you worse? Will money spoil you? Psychologists say that money only exposes and sharpens those traits that were already characteristic of a person. Someone, having become rich, organizes orgies, and someone turns into a philanthropist.
There is also nothing shameful in having wealth and spending on luxury. By spending money, you stimulate the development of various areas of production, which means that many people receive salaries thanks to you. For example, you buy a car - and the manager of the car dealership receives a percentage of the sale, the dealer and the factory receive profit, engineers work on new prototypes, moving the equipment forward, and workers calmly turn the nuts, knowing that the owner of the company will not have to fire them. So who feels bad because you bought a cool car?
By demonizing money, a weak person recognizes himself as its slave. The strong remain free. Treat money as a tool: if you are not Jack the Ripper, you will cut bread with a knife, right? Or maybe plan something beautiful. Enjoy the opportunities that money brings!
How to force yourself to move?
The best way to self-motivate yourself is to look at yourself from the outside, as if through the eyes of another person (of the opposite sex), and at the same time answer the question: “Would I want to have a serious relationship with the person I see?” Most likely, the answer will be “no,” because the shortcomings that people are accustomed to forgiving themselves are usually difficult for others to accept.
Having come to this conclusion, you need to write down on paper (point by point) all the disadvantages of your personality that prevented you from answering the previous question positively. In this way, the main points that require work on yourself will become clear. Looking at the list, on another sheet of paper you need to make a second list under the slogan: “What should I change in myself to become ideal for myself?” The main thing when answering this question is to be frank and not look for excuses such as: “If I quit smoking, I will become fat” or “I can’t go to the gym because it’s too far from my house.”
The philosopher Pedro Calderon once said these words, now often used as a quote: “Overcoming oneself is a great feat that only a great person is capable of.” However, modern time managers are sure that the process of such a “feat” itself makes no sense without sufficient motivation, and this is exactly what you should think about first.
Stop worshiping money
The demonization of money also has a flip side - the deification of the golden calf. A person sees only money, and perceives it not as a tool, but as a deity, as an idol. The desire to have money turns into passion, mania, obsession. Greed pushes some to unseemly and sometimes even criminal acts, while others force them to take excessive risks. For a trader, the deification of money gives rise to those emotions that lead to catastrophic mistakes and ruin: greed, fear of losses, excitement, hopes of hitting the jackpot...
Keep your cool. You should manage your money, not money should manage your thoughts and emotions. You are the owner of money, not the other way around.
Consequences of fears
Emerging fears influence the formation of a person’s character and ability to adapt in various conditions. The patient may have overestimated or underestimated demands on himself. This also affects self-esteem.
Leading a certain lifestyle, social activity and simple human relationships potentially pose a threat to the psyche. Any mistake or failure can become a starting point for the development of mental health problems.
The fear of success rarely manifests itself, but its existence deprives one of material wealth and the desire to develop. The fear complex can take many forms, the most common being the Jonah and Imposter complex.
Jonah complex
This concept was given to the psychological phenomenon by psychologist Maslow. This is the tendency of people to fear their own lives. The Jonah complex appears:
- non-acceptance of one's own individuality;
- fear of standing out from the environment;
- fear of being the best at something;
- fear of realizing one's own plans.
The patient is not able to overcome all difficulties due to the belief in envy, jealousy and ill will of others. It is easier for him not to stand out from the crowd than to attract attention to himself through well-deserved work, determination, etc.
A person with a Jonah complex is convinced of the constant envy of others
Imposter syndrome
This psychological disorder manifests itself in a lack of faith in one’s own strengths and an underestimation of one’s own merits. Someone with impostor syndrome may suffer from:
- self-deception;
- lack of confidence in one's competence;
- fear of inadequacy of personal or social role.
It seems to the patient that his efforts are undeserved, and he himself does not have the strength to solve new problems. A person suffering from impostor syndrome thinks that success came to him by accident.
Don't be afraid to lose money
The biographies of many traders and entrepreneurs are like a roller coaster: these people went broke several times, and then again earned millions. The ability to rise after falling into the abyss is one of the hallmarks of a born businessman. He views money not as a piece of gold that needs to be hidden somewhere and carefully guarded, but as circulating assets designed to make new money. If for some reason a personal financial collapse occurs, you just need to find starting capital again.
Live with confidence that you can earn money tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and at any time. Don’t let your money lie like a dead weight, invest it - both in business and in health, comfort, and impressions. Take money lightly. But this, of course, does not mean that you need to light a cigarette from banknotes. Combine money management with reasonable risk, play it safe and avoid potholes - but don't refuse to walk for fear of tripping.
What is success
We often hear “success”, “success” and all that kind of stuff. But how do you know whether a person is successful or not? Success in psychology is defined as a positive result of a person’s actions, the achievement of his goals, recognition of the public or a group significant to the individual. A little abstruse, but I'll explain it in practice.
A person who has achieved success in life is not only rich or a champion. If your goal is to help children with cancer, and you have organized assistance for 10 children, you can already be considered successful. If you set a goal to build a house and built it, you have already achieved success. If you defended your dissertation, you are respected - you are already successful. As you can see, this concept is multifaceted.
All people want to be successful and achieve something. But not everyone succeeds, unfortunately. And why? Because they give up quickly. Everything cannot go “like clockwork”; sometimes you have to encounter difficulties. But you can always change your life for the better!
Obstacles on the path to success:
- giving up the goal after the first failure;
- painful perception of criticism;
- fear of taking the first step;
- procrastination – putting off everything “for later”.
No wonder they say: “Living life is not crossing a field.” Everyone faces difficulties, but some get up and move on, while others lose heart and stop halfway.
I want this article to help you feel successful, and if not, motivate you to set goals and achieve them.
Live like you're already rich
It’s worth explaining right away that many people take this recommendation incorrectly: with their last money (and even on credit), they buy expensive clothes, acquire status accessories, and go to prestigious places for lunch (in the evening, chewing empty pasta in a rented room with peeled wallpaper). Thus, they try to try on the lifestyle of wealthy people and psychologically join this circle. Unfortunately, most often it is clearly visible from the outside that you only have this suit made of English wool, and at the table in a restaurant you are desperately hungry, because you only have enough money for a light salad.
Exploring the “good life” is useful within the limits of adequacy: for example, you can visit an expensive restaurant to get a taste of the life you aspire to. Take a business class ticket. Rent an expensive car for a day. And then work to have it all on an ongoing basis. But you shouldn’t imitate a rich life every day if you have to pay for it with austerity on basic needs. You can’t fool the subconscious: it sees that your suit is chic, but your socks have holes. In other words, that you are a poor man trying to appear rich.
The thinking of a rich person is expressed in a different way. This is a feeling of inner freedom and confidence in the future, the perception of a world of luxury without envy, since you are part of this world, and the understanding that the desired benefits are available to you.
A person with a poor man's mentality hates wealth and at the same time envies it. A person with the mindset of a rich man is calm - he knows that he can buy everything. If not today, then tomorrow.
Remember: a king in rags is still a king, and a beggar in silks is still a beggar.
Do you want to be a king? Live with the thought that the crown is yours by right!
We continue to move towards wealth and abundance: removing limiting beliefs and fears
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Last time we talked about the basic steps you need to take to live an abundant life. Let me remind you once again - if you don’t have deep permission and desire to be rich, then you shouldn’t go further yet - it’s like building a house without a foundation. Even if you build it, it won't last long.
But when the foundation is ready, you can begin the third step - change your thinking. You need to reconfigure your mental program - a set of thoughts about money, wealth and abundance. Each person has his own set of attitudes that prevent him from moving towards financial freedom. And in order to take a step towards a fundamentally different way of life, you need to work through these attitudes and throw away all the husks.
Coaches call these false assumptions or limiting beliefs. They don't let us see opportunities. For example, until I was 28, I was convinced that I was a spender. And no matter how much I earned, every month I managed to spend it all. Until I worked through this installation, I could not begin to manage my finances. This is one of the most common false attitudes. Another popular limiting belief is that women themselves cannot earn much with their own intelligence, labor, and energy. Of course, in reality there are many more such attitudes, but these two are found in many women. And these are huge obstacles on our path to abundance.
How to find your settings? I recommend doing a written practice: in a state of calm, balance and tranquility, when you have a few free hours, when you don’t have to run anywhere or do anything, sit down and write down all your thoughts regarding money on several sheets of paper. I’ll say right away that to correctly perform the practice you need at least an hour, and during this time you must write down several sheets of paper - if it turns out to be less, it means that you cheated somewhere. Write everything: memories from childhood, films, TV series, books, words from loved ones and acquaintances - everything that comes up. Start with phrases like “Money means to me...” and it will flow from there. Mom said that our neighbor is rich because he is a thief. Dad believed that he would never be able to earn more because he was too honest. And so on and so forth.
Don’t focus only on the negative - write positive attitudes, neutral ones, and those thoughts that you cannot immediately evaluate. Just a stream of consciousness on the topic of money, wealth, abundance.
At some point, fears related to finances will begin to surface, and they also need to be written down, because getting rid of fears is the fourth step to abundance. Write down your fears and the fears of your loved ones and those around you.
From these memories, which in an hour - or maybe longer, there are no time limits here - will accumulate several sheets, you will learn a lot of new things about yourself. Usually your mental program becomes immediately visible. And here I have good news: it’s never too late to change it. First you need to get rid of old attitudes, and then seed the new space with new beliefs - positive ones, leading to wealth and abundance.
I recommend returning to these covered sheets of paper when you have rested and with a clear head. Take two pens of different colors, such as green and red, and note negative and positive thoughts and statements. Without judging, without criticizing, just mark.
Next, look separately at the negative attitudes and work through them. Remember that these attitudes and fears are like your blinders. Because of them, you do not see opportunities and options, because you look and think very narrowly. There are a lot of ways to work through attitudes and get rid of fears, I give them in all my programs. Start by legalizing this fear. It's okay to be afraid. We are genetically created to survive, and we need fears, stress hormones, precisely for this. Fears are part of our nature. They protect us from rash steps, they preserve our capital. Without them, we could lose everything.
But fear has big eyes. When we are afraid, fear overshadows the whole picture, it becomes huge, its significance is exaggerated. Remember the last time you were afraid of something, and then you overcame yourself and did it anyway - and it turned out that it wasn’t so scary, it wasn’t all that bad. Therefore, you need to simply blow away your current fears with an effort of thought. Pop like balloons. Reset their significance. Break down every fear that prevents you from moving towards abundance and wealth into its components - and you will understand that in fact there is nothing scary. And the fear will go away.
And then you need to look for goals and motivation, learn financial literacy and find real ways to increase your wealth - we are working on this in my “Abundance of the Goddess” program. But first, be sure to work through your fears and limiting beliefs.
Do not be stingy
They say that in order for the energy of money to flow in, it is necessary to create channels for its outflow—in other words, to spend it. And stinginess “blocks” the channels through which energy flows. I am, of course, not inclined to take this picture literally. This is just an image, a metaphor. The reluctance to spend money sends a signal to the subconscious: “You don’t need to earn more. There is nowhere to spend, there is enough for everything. We have enough."
Psychologists distinguish two financial strategies: earning and saving. And the person directs his energy either to finding new sources of income or to looking for discounts on toilet paper.
Let me emphasize once again: no one is saying that money should be squandered. But you should distinguish between reasonable spending and life in saving mode.
An important point: be generous not only towards yourself. Get positive emotions from the gifts you give to your loved ones. Don't forget about charity - many rich people become philanthropists.
If the subconscious mind sees that you have somewhere to spend money, it sends a signal: “You need to earn more!”
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Habits
If you want to become different, more confident
person, then your previous habits also need to be changed. For example, take some old habit of yours and redo it. There is no need to do this in any drastic way; it is enough to just add new colors and touches.
If you have done exercises before, this is commendable, but now try to add music to it, or do it in a different place than where you did it before. Or do it in the evening rather than in the morning.
Or you can go on your lunch break to dine not in your usual place, but in a completely new one, somewhere you have never been before. You can try changing your eating habits and switching to vegetarian food, or you can change your music preferences. The choice is yours.
Everyone has doubts about their appearance.
We've all had those moments when you look at your sweaty face in a bar bathroom and think, "Oh my God, I look like a melting wax statue." Nobody likes these moments—it's frustrating to realize that you're not always as sexy as you look in your profile photos. The truth is that we all sometimes look like a melted statue even though we think we look great.
But even the people we call beautiful have stupid moments in which photographers catch them. Remember that famous photo of Beyoncé that her lawyer tried to remove from the Internet? Even if we are beautiful now, sooner or later wrinkles will appear on our faces, and we should treat each other a little easier. Like when you were a kid, when no one cared what you looked like.
Your problems are not unique
The most common paranoia: others live better than me. You have a lot of debt, no good job, little pay, and soon you will have to move back to your parents. People around you lie, guys disappoint, life goes downhill. And guess what? This happens in exactly the same way for all people. Your friends, brothers, sisters, even those you just bump into on the street are all the same. Yes, there are people who find a great job literally fifteen minutes after graduating from university. They have a big bedroom and they can afford breakfast at Starbucks, but there are very, very few people like that. Just ignore them (or kill them and take their place). The fact that you curse their wonderful life will not spoil it or improve the quality of yours. Don't let yourself think that you're the only one who can't make ends meet.
