Life without a goal. Where to go next?

Lack of interest in life: where does it come from?

Psychologists are often approached with the question of how to make life more interesting and find meaning in it. Let alone the difficulties of making changes for the better.

For some reason, in the modern world, being very busy at work is considered the norm, and it is advisable to periodically attend all kinds of professional courses and self-development trainings.

No, I'm not saying it's bad. But, if you live like a squirrel in a wheel and don’t even have time to get a decent night’s sleep between work, courses and attempts to arrange your personal life, then you definitely need to do something about it.

You probably have a question now: how does this relate to the lack of incentive to live?

The connection is actually direct. Look, if you sleep five hours a day and work hard, then sooner or later the body’s resources will come to an end.

Of course, at first everything will happen as planned. But at some point, it will become clear that your once-favorite training sessions only cause yawning, you quietly hate work, and your biggest dream is to get enough sleep on the weekend.

This is what lack of interest in life looks like. In fact, this condition occurs due to common chronic fatigue. And it is precisely at this point that the question arises, how can one again feel happy and interested in what is happening.

It is worth noting that interest in life can also disappear due to psychological trauma. For example, the loss of a loved one, physical or emotional abuse. In this case, you should not engage in “self-medication”.

The peculiarity of psychological trauma is that it can affect our existence for many years. Sometimes it happens that the circumstances have long been forgotten, and the consequences still do not allow us to breathe deeply. Therefore, in this case, you should immediately contact a psychologist.

And one more thing: it is impossible to trigger such states, since they end in depression and apathy. And this should be addressed not to a psychologist, but to a psychotherapist or even a psychiatrist. In general, it is better to react immediately!

Another option for losing motivation to do something is a creative crisis. It occurs most often in people whose activities should include a muse.

The lack of creativity in this case is very difficult to experience, so a little later I will tell you how to get it back.

Stimulus for life - why it is difficult to find

As the popular expression attributed to various philosophers goes, “a question asked correctly is half the answer.”
Therefore, when trying to find an incentive to live, a person should first think about his goals: why he lives in this world. Depending on the meaning that people put into their existence, it is worth selecting the incentive - after all, the motivation of a Buddhist monk, an American athlete or a Russian teacher will be completely different. Having defined your goals, you should set priorities: what will contribute and what, on the contrary, is an obstacle to achieving the desired result. However, the question about the true meaning of life, which has worried humanity for thousands of years, has not yet found the only correct answer. There are different opinions, for example, as some modern philosophers argue, the meaning of life is in itself. Every moment of life is unique and valuable, and trials and hardships are necessary for balance, balancing the happy moments that befall a person. After all, you can understand what “white” is only by comparing it with “black”. And only the person himself will be able to give an answer about the meaning of his existence, and therefore choose a suitable incentive for himself.

Thoughts about finding a stimulus in life often come during times of crisis. It is not necessary that the person has experienced any shock or hardship. It happens that people, having seemingly achieved everything they dreamed of (marriage, financial well-being, career, etc.), realize that they have lost the most important thing - the desire to strive for something again. You can try to wait out this moment, taking advantage of the circumstances to relax and gain strength for new achievements, or you can reconsider your life tasks and goals - after all, some people just need to stop from time to time and think about how and why they live.

How to motivate yourself if there is no incentive and you give up?

If you are tired and you no longer have the strength to do anything, then the first thing you need to do is rest. Yes Yes! If you want to start working, you first need to rest. Because you no longer have internal resources. And if there are no resources, there is no interest, inspiration, or desire to live.

Note! Relaxing does not mean sleeping twenty hours a day. Firstly, in this way you will disrupt your daily routine. And secondly, too much sleep can also cause apathy.

Rest in this case means a change of scenery, getting new experiences, and finding something that inspires. For example, in moments of such overwork, going to a rock concert helps me. In such an atmosphere, an infection of positive emotions occurs.

Now let's talk about those situations when a person gives up. The root cause of this state is fear, uncertainty and doubts about the correctness of one’s own actions; one can also fear for one’s future.

How to motivate yourself in this case? The first option is to gather all your willpower into a fist, imagine the result of all your actions and slowly and confidently move towards it.

In this case, it is worth remembering that at the beginning you will often break away from the intended path, feel guilty and hopeless. But the main thing is to continue the action no matter what.

Attention! Remember one simple thought: if you give up today, then tomorrow will not become easier, simpler or more fun. Give up and things will get worse after a while. To fear, doubt and uncertainty will be added a feeling of guilt and powerlessness.

Typically, the occurrence of such a situation causes deep depression, along with which health problems and cravings for alcohol or smoking may arise.

If you can’t gather willpower and start acting (and this is a very likely scenario, not everyone is super strong-willed and strong-willed), then you need to start developing willpower.

We will use self-hypnosis in this case. To do this, we first define the problem. For example, you can’t get ready and start doing some important work.

We come up with something like the following phrase for self-hypnosis: every day I become more and more focused. The phrase must be repeated two to three times every morning.

Finding an incentive to live as work on yourself

It happens that a person feels the need for a stimulus under the influence of negative circumstances (loss of a job, divorce, death of someone close and other trials of fate). When you give up and don’t want to move on with your life, you can’t allow yourself to get bogged down more and more in these thoughts. As the main character of the cult “Gone with the Wind” said, it’s better to think about it tomorrow. For now, focus on pressing concerns. This will be especially effective if the actions are related to physical activity - cleaning the home, doing laundry or any similar activities. As banal as it may sound, such advice, according to a number of psychologists, is quite universal and at the same time effective.

For many, the incentive is money, or rather, material well-being. And there is nothing wrong with this if people strive to provide for themselves in honest ways, without going too deep into work. However, when work or the process of making money becomes the only meaning and incentive for existence, it is worth thinking about your priorities - it is important to find a place for other equally important factors necessary for a full life. Communicating with relatives and friends, actively relaxing and playing sports or your favorite hobby, traveling and making new friends, you can feel that life is filled with meaning, and there is simply no need to search for incentives!

How to overcome your laziness and develop motivation?

All people are lazy! But it’s one thing when we just rested a little, so we continue to do the work. And it’s a completely different case when we can’t get out of this state for a long time.

First, let's figure out what laziness is for you? If instead of working you watch movies and TV series, then this is not laziness. This is a reluctance to deal with current affairs.

The way to deal with this is simple: start doing nothing. As soon as you realize that you need to work, and you are watching another series, we immediately get up, turn off the series and sit on a stool in the middle of the room. And we do nothing. We just sit and look at one point.

Believe me, after about five minutes you will want to do at least something just to get up and leave this stool. And at this moment it is necessary to direct energy to do the work. After all, you can watch something interesting later when you get tired.

Why do you need an incentive?

Like the original use of a physical object, this modern intangible phenomenon signifies an urge to action. Only now people are playing the role of elephants. Stimulation works in the following cases of human life:

• stop in development;
• resolving a difficult situation: a threat to well-being or a way out of an impasse;
• overcoming certain character traits: laziness, fear, etc.;
• self-affirmation;
• helping other people.

How to create if your muse has left you?

The issue of finding incentives for creative people is a separate issue. It’s important not just to force yourself to do something, but also to catch inspiration. After all, without it, not a single masterpiece will be created. And the main thing here is to relax, gain new impressions.

Incentive and motivation - what's the difference?

In terms of the result of the action, these concepts are the same. Motivation and stimulation encourage a person to move forward. The difference between them lies in the nature of the force that forces a person to do something. It is as follows:

1. Motivation is an internal need that arises in the structures of human consciousness. Outwardly, it manifests itself as an object of satisfaction that needs to be achieved in order to calm the thirst of desire.
2. The source of motivation is “along the course of movement” of the individual.
3. The stimulus arises from the outside from the developing circumstances of life.
4. Stimulation of development acts under compulsion against the will of the individual. In contrast to motivation: it realizes a voluntary desire.
5. The object of satisfaction of stimulation is located within the consciousness of a person.

Stimulation methods

One of the most common methods of inducing action is called “carrot and stick.” This comprehensive incentive system includes two methods. Experts highlight a few more:

1. Competition
   . This is inducing a desire to improve compared to others. The incentive is implemented under conditions of inclusiveness, equality and careful consideration of results.
2. Encouragement
   . Stimulation through encouragement and positive evaluation of activities. When using this method, you need to adhere to timeliness, awareness, specificity, and an individual approach.
3. Punishment
   . In this case, organizational behavior defines incentive goals as inhibition of ineffective and negative activities with further correction. Conditions for implementation: awareness, preservation of dignity, proportionality, infrequent use.

How to find incentive?

This situation is reminiscent of a sailing ship entering a river with a fast current from the ocean. Sailors on a boat transport an anchor. Having reached the place, they throw it off. By selecting the anchor chain, the ship is pulled along the river. Stimulating work in the absence of incentive can be achieved with small tricks:

1. Visualization of goals. This could be a board with the desired result written on it, or a piece of paper with a collage of pictures.
2. One step back, two steps forward. Sometimes it is useful to step back from a goal (for example, taking a nap during the day, breaking your schedule).
3. Techniques of self-hypnosis. Everyone has their own: yell at yourself or praise, admire the first result, persuade your ego and the like.
4. Vivid examples from the lives of others who lost incentive, but found it. It is recommended to watch and read inspiring videos and books.
5. Detailed plan for every day. This is the anchor that can pull you out of the hole. You just need to carry out all the steps “automatically”.

Types of incentives

Depending on the direction of impact, they are divided into:

• material;
• intangible.

Behavioral incentives that relate to material rewards can be:

1. Cash allowances, bonuses, surcharges.
2. Providing vouchers to sanatoriums and recreation centers.
3. Payment for city transport tickets.
4. Providing health insurance and free medical care.
5. Improving working conditions.
6. Equipment of the immediate workplace according to a modern model.

What a non-material stimulus is can be understood if we consider that a person is a spiritual and social being. Stimulation can be:

• moral;
• psychological;
• social;
• creative

Material incentives

An incentive may be given to employees if the administration increases their wages. The reason for this may be:

• overfulfillment of the volume of goods and services;
• improvement of labor qualifications;
• simultaneous combination of work positions;
• performing a given amount of work with fewer people or in a shorter period of time;
• by rewarding rationalization and invention;
• improving the quality of work;
• reducing production costs and saving materials;
• high performance throughout the year.

Negative incentives are expressed in the deprivation of bonuses and allowances. What is a material incentive in non-monetary terms:

• introduction of consumer services for employees at the enterprise;
• purchase of housing and provision of service apartments;
• provision of children's preschool institutions;
• payment for medical and resort vouchers;
• improving hygiene and sanitation conditions in the workplace.

Non-material incentives

Stimulating a person in this way is more diverse and broader than material interest. Psychologists identify the following non-material incentives:

1. Moral
   . It manifests itself in the expression in various forms of respect for the work performed. This could be an expression of gratitude, the presentation of a diploma or certificate of honor, or the conferment of titles. A negative incentive requires a reprimand, hanging a photo on a shame board.
2. Social
   . This area concerns increasing the prestige of work, ensuring career growth, and providing the opportunity to participate in the life of the team.
3. Creative
   . The stimulus of life here is associated with the realization of a person’s inner potential, the disclosure of the ability to create.