How to discuss relationships if your partner avoids the conversation

Techniques to help you find out the truth

An effective, but very sophisticated technique is surprise. Talking confidentially with your interlocutor, smiling at him, showing your friendliness with all your appearance, you suddenly stun him with the question to which you want to hear a truthful answer. Choose a topic for conversation that is far from your interest in order to lull your opponent’s vigilance. Having waited for the opportune moment when the interlocutor began to trust you completely, ask an exciting question. To prevent your interlocutor from evading, ask it so loudly that even those around you can hear it. Most likely, you will hear what you wanted to find out.
Blackmail also sometimes works. If you want to find out something from a child, then you may well succeed. Threaten him that you will block access to the computer or not take him to the cinema. You can threaten a friend who is for some reason afraid to look you in the eyes with a quarrel, a wife - don’t buy what you promised, a husband who has completely lied - a night in an empty bed. But this method can only be used once, if you do not fulfill what you threatened during blackmail. The second time may only have an effect on a child.
"I know everything". This technique works when you really know everything, but want to hear recognition from your interlocutor. You can add the words: “it will be better if you tell everything yourself or yourself.” Such conflict resolution will help maintain friendship between friends, resolve disagreements between business partners, and you can even save your family if you can forgive your other half for speaking out. By using this technique, you will not put pressure on your opponent, you will simply present him with the opportunity to confess. In this case, he will see for himself that it is better to tell everything honestly and apologize. And all you have to do is understand and perhaps forgive.
A very correct technique - eye to eye. Look the other person straight in the eye and ask about what interests you. If he values your trust or friendship, then he will lay everything out in the open. If he looks away, then your question took him by surprise.

What's the best way to start?

Sometimes, a good start can lead the whole conversation in the right direction and bring relief to both partners - this is ideal.

It is best to take your time and choose the appropriate moment when both are calm and ready to talk.

Avoid tense, harsh phrases like “we need to talk,” which can immediately build a wall between the participants in the conversation.

Formulate the same thing a little differently: “I wanted to tell you something,” “I can talk to you. I’m worried…” so that the partner feels a sincere note in the voice, the caring gaze of a loved one.

How to catch your husband cheating

To find out from your husband about cheating, you should become an actress for a while. An example situation: you and your husband agreed to visit your parents on Friday immediately after work. Suddenly my husband calls and says that he has urgent matters. You already know his “deeds.”

When your husband returns home late at night, do not attack him with abuse, so as not to aggravate the situation. In this case, the spouse may simply leave in an unknown direction!

If you know that he is lying, do the opposite: offer to go to the table, let him relax, ask how his working day was. In a word, put your husband to sleep, and then say: “Darling, why did you refuse to visit my parents?”

At this time, watch TV or read a book, showing with all your appearance that this is supposedly not so significant.

It is important that your man should notice this. And here he will begin to explain something to you. Just don’t press him, but continue to create a calm environment. If you are not satisfied, then move on to the “I know everything” if you really want to know its truth. Remember, you then have to live with this truth or get divorced. The psychology of a woman is such that she rarely forgives betrayal. So do you need the whole truth?

Advice: ask yourself: am I better off with him or without him? Then decide what to do. Or get revenge by cheating just once. Just don’t talk about it, even on pain of death. It is more difficult for a man to come to terms with his wife's betrayal.

There are some funny folk methods to catch a man cheating.

When your spouse returns from work, try to greet him with overwhelming tenderness, as if you missed him very much, then offer to make love right now . If a man has just left his mistress, then he is not able right now to the next intimacy.
A tougher, even funny trick is to pour pepper into his underpants . When your loved one starts scratching, do the same. Here, accuse him of treason. If there was betrayal, then the loved one admits it.

Chapter: RULES FOR OPENING SECRET LOCKS
CONTINUATION OF THE TOPIC “
Sexual fantasies
“
A rough crowbar cannot open a complex lock. Knowledge of the mechanism is required. The same is true with understanding a person’s sexual needs. The proverb says correctly: “The soul of man is darkness.” No one will open up just like that. Give away all your secrets! Moreover, do not count on your partner’s frankness if there are cold relationships in the family. But it is necessary to understand, to understand. Man is not made of iron, but he is much stronger than it when it comes to sex.
You do not believe? Then do an experiment with your partner. Get into bed with your spouse and ask about his deepest desires. At best, you will get “Leave me alone, what else do you need.” But you may hear, “You’re completely crazy.” And awaken jealousy in your partner. There is no way to do this without following strict rules. So, let's move on to studying the rules for opening secret locks, behind which we will find sexual needs and fantasies.
It is necessary to insulate marital relations as much as possible. Read books on psychology and apply their content to your family environment. Without mastering your partner, it is useless to do anything.
The main way to understand your spouse is a confidential conversation. You should only talk in bed. This creates the necessary atmosphere. While driving at high speed in a car, asking about the secrets of love is probably unwise. You can also lie in bed in different ways, for example, turning away and reading a newspaper. It is better to talk at the moment of intertwining bodies into one single loving body. This way the conversation will be more frank, and there is an opportunity to take a break before the next games.
Take things gradually. Don't shock your partner with direct questions. Today we asked about one. After a week, ask again. Make it a habit to talk. The latter approach will not alert you, will not frighten you, and will not lead to unjustified jealousy.
You shouldn't trust the first words he says. “Don’t worry, I’m fine as is!” “I’m already pleased, thank you.” These words can mean something completely different. "I'm ready to talk to you." “Be patient and I will be honest with you soon.” Here it is better to recall the words of E. Bern: “The majority of human relationships (at least 51%) are based on deceptions and tricks, sometimes cheerful and funny, sometimes low and evil. Only a fortunate few, such as mothers and babies, are true friends and lovers who are completely sincere with each other.”
Partners often tell lies not because of shyness (which spouses who have lived together for several years should be shy about), but because they fall into a trap. “He will then consider me a prostitute.” “She will think that I climb under all the women’s skirts.” It seems that we have decided to evaluate the words of refusal critically. Then let's move on.
Arouse your partner's desire to be frank by revealing your playing cards. The quid pro quo principle will do the trick, no doubt about it. “Sorry, dear, but for some time now I, as a man, have become indifferent to you. But I love you, that’s why I’m revealing this secret to you.” “I owe you an apology too. Your unwillingness to take care of yourself began to irritate me and even push me away from you.” Here you need to keep in mind that as you overcome one obstacle, you approach another, but you are steadily moving towards your goal. So the behavioral theses of the spouses will sound differently. “I’m listening to you carefully.” “You can continue, I’m ready to listen to everything.” But at any moment, spouses must be prepared that one of them may make a sharp turn. "Do you have another one?" “Tell me honestly, did you cheat on me?”
Use all available means to explore your partner's sexual needs. Observing your partner will give you a lot. A husband may hear at a party that his wife talks about other men among her friends. The husband made a remark to the television star. This is already interesting to my wife. Seeing that your husband has shown increased interest in some television story on intimate topics, specifically ask him to stand up and ask him to help bring a pie from the kitchen. He can quickly get up with an indifferent look and go. But he can say, with a barely noticeable note of disapproval - like, now. And then he gets up and runs quickly. Behavioral thesis: “This is very interesting to me and I need to come back quickly.” What is being shown on the screen at this time? There is something to think about here.
The most important thing to understand in this matter is that a person will not open up right away. It takes time, patience and great observation. Paying attention to your partner will benefit both of you.
A. Lippius, book “Games for Adults”
PUBLISHED IN THE “WWWoman” MAGAZINE on February 17, 2004 PREVIOUS MATERIAL IN THIS RUBBER: WHAT STANDS US FROM PLAYING AND IMAGINATING?
SEXUAL FANTASIES FURTHER PREVIOUS CHAPTERS OF THE BOOK
:
Adultery is an eternal topic
Cheating: evil or joy?
What is treason?
Formula for treason
Extra-familial sexual relations
Why did the word “treason” appear?
Fear of betrayal
Why do extramarital affairs exist?
Is betrayal inevitable?
The struggle of two forces
Psycho-physical rhythms of sexuality
The inevitability that pleases everyone
The difference between male and female infidelity
Critical responses to publications in this section
TEST: Do you know your spouse?
Two dangerous pits of family life
About sexual temperament
Each spouse wants his own
There are no perfect husbands and wives
Why can't we find the ideal?
What kind of wife are you?
Which of the two wives is better?
Sexual strictures and liberties
Critical responses to publications in this section

How to achieve recognition from the female half

Sometimes a husband finds fault with his wife with stupid questions: where have you been, and who have you been with? It is he who knows nothing about betrayal, if it occurs. You can say whatever you want, your husband will believe it, if there is no real “evidence”.

But if there is accurate information about the betrayal, then the wife can also be brought to a frank conversation.

Advice! Never tell your husband everything. Men do not forgive infidelity. Even if they forgive, they will never forget. They are great owners!

If you want to know about your wife's double life, then try using these techniques.

Create an environment where your wife is always in front of you. This way she won’t have time to run to her lover. Now watch! Soon she will miss him, will not stand such a life, then she will openly tell him everything. Then you either break up or put up with the state of things .

Make a cunning move, showing as much care, affection, and participation as possible. Soon the wife will feel ashamed and she will confess with tears in her eyes. But a woman does not always fall for this. She may simply become depressed, go to another room, and then cry into her pillow. This is real proof of infidelity.

You can ask directly , most likely, the answer will not be truthful. Therefore, immediately say: I know that you have another man. Tell me, is it so or not? Do not give the opportunity to evade the answer if you want to know the whole truth.

If you want to promote your girlfriend to a truthful answer, convince your beloved that you know everything and are not expecting the truth. They say that girls are easier to succumb to such a “canard” and tell everything themselves.

So you found out about the double life of your other half, does it make you feel better? Of course not! Try to find an explanation for her betrayal in your own behavior. Perhaps she is bored, or you are not paying her as much attention as she needs. Dig into yourself!

How to get a man to confess

The girls are waiting for their beloved to tell her about his feelings, but he does not dare. The reason for such embarrassment may be a serious attitude towards such words, and not a simple reluctance to utter them. And they are also afraid to hear ridicule or something like that after confessing. Don't put pressure on your loved one.

If you see that this is your person and you are ready to go through life with him, then hint at your feelings for him. The guy will relax and say the cherished words. Or maybe you don’t need such words if there is real love between you!

Rules for communicating with strangers

There are often situations in which you have to start a conversation with strangers. For some it can be stressful, but if you follow simple rules, most likely your interlocutor will be satisfied with your new acquaintance. How to learn to talk to people you see for the first time?

If a meeting with a person is planned, then before that you can prepare and collect the necessary information about the interlocutor: find out about his hobbies, marital status, etc.

Try to start a conversation first, so as not to put your interlocutor in an awkward position by remaining silent.

Before starting a conversation, you should approach the person and smile.

During the first conversation, you need to look at the face of the interlocutor, but you should not look into the eyes for a long time, this may confuse your opponent.

Try to remember the names of all strangers.

Try to find common topics for conversation: hobbies, films, music, etc.

Be interested in the opinion of the interlocutor and try to tell a little general information about yourself.

Paying attention to the advantages of a person’s appearance and giving a compliment will not be superfluous. Just don’t openly lie about advantages that don’t exist, this will cause a negative backlash from the participant in the conversation.

How can I find out the information I need? It happens that an unpleasant person has the necessary information or his participation is necessary for something. In this case, there is only one thing left - to seek a compromise and negotiate.

How to spot a liar in correspondence

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Many people think that in correspondence a person can lie as much as he wants.

Using some techniques you can find out whether the person with whom you are corresponding is honest with you.

Long sentences. He wants to hide his lies behind a mass of words.
Introductory words. If the sentence contains the words “maybe”, “I’ll try”, etc., then the person is hiding information from you.
Repeat information. To the question: “Has there already been something between you?” Trying to convince you, a person will repeat a lie several times, convincing you that “this is my friend,” “we are only friends,” or something like that.
By delaying your answer or typing for a long time, the interlocutor is clearly hiding something. He thinks about every word or decides whether to tell the truth or lie again.
If there is no answer at all, then this is already a signal!
The interlocutor makes you guilty: “Oh, you think so badly of me, everything is clear to me”!
If the interlocutor switches the conversation to another topic, he is clearly hiding something.
He may turn on the “fool”, clearly mocking your concerns. Don't let yourself be caught in these nets. He is stalling for time to come up with another lie.
If you hear complaints: either about being unwell or being busy. The person simply doesn't want to deal with you. If you have nothing in common with this opponent, then break ties with him.

Magic ritual

Magic is on the side of those people who want to hear the truth about a person. Whether you need to use magical rituals is up to you to decide. After all, you may find out something that will push you away from each other forever. And if you love, you can’t live without him or her, and a conspiracy will help you find out the hidden, intimate? How to live with this then?

In parting, I want to say: first think a hundred times, and then turn to magic.

Magic ritual for sleep

On the day of the waxing moon, whisper in your husband’s ear while he sleeps:

“I remember the Glorious Lord, whose name everyone knows, whose name everyone glorifies. He rules all creations on earth, gives life to everything and everyone. I ask my Lord to put a petal of truth into the mouth of the servant of God (name of the man). Let that petal bloom in it and speak on its own. Let that petal in the dream of the servant of God (the man’s name) open into a great flower of truth, which will tell me everything I want to know, and I, the servant of God (my name), want to know everything. Key. Lock. Amen".

The husband will soon begin to babble the whole truth. Even if you fall asleep, his babble will wake you up.

How to find out the truth in a conversation

Tomorrow you want to have an honest conversation, suspecting that the person is not completely honest with you.

Write the person's full name on a piece of paper and light a candle. Move the piece of paper over the candle while reading the plot:

“He told me, he said everything, he wasn’t afraid. He came to me and poured out his soul. I'm talking about the servant of God (his name). On a universal scale, your truth is a drop, do not be afraid; in an infinite key, your truth is only yours. I will find out everything, I will understand everything, we speak heart to heart, we speak with our souls, not our mouths. As has been said, it will be so, but it cannot be any other way.”

Next, fold the sheet of paper in four and place it under your pillow. After the revelation, you need to get rid of it. Such a ritual will remove the fear of recognition from the soul of the interlocutor. Keep in mind that you will also tell a lot of things that you were silent about. Perhaps this will help improve contact with your interlocutor.

How to force a liar to confess

On the waxing moon, looking at the photograph of the liar, say:

“As soon as you look into my eyes, you stop lying. The truth makes you feel bad inside, it makes you sick, it’s better without it, tell me once, then it will go on its own, you can speak, so it pours out. Our frank dialogue. Everything pours out, everything leaves, everything comes to me. It’s easier for me and it’s easier for me. My eyes, your truth. As has been said, it will be so, but it cannot be any other way.”

The next day, look the liar in the eyes, then just listen: he will tell you everything as if in spirit. This technique can be applied to children who are liars. Now decide for yourself, do you want to know the whole truth?