Break up or...? How to understand that it is definitely time to resolve this issue


How to decide on a Descartes square using 4 questions?

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This method was proposed by Rene Descartes, the famous French philosopher, engineer, mathematician, creator of the philosophy of radical doubt. His "square" method helps to understand the consequences of any choice.

Descartes Square is a simple but super-effective technique for helping you make difficult decisions. The idea of ​​the method is to analyze any problem from different points of view.

How to decide on a Descartes square

Before making a decision, give honest answers to Descartes' 4 questions:

  1. What will happen if this happens?
  2. What happens if this doesn't happen?
  3. What won't happen if this happens?
  4. What won't happen if this doesn't happen?

Why is this method so effective? When a person is in a situation that requires making a difficult decision, he often gets stuck on the first point and is unable to fully evaluate the situation.

Attention! Be careful when answering the last question - the brain will try to ignore the double negative, and the answer will be identical to the first. It shouldn't be this way.

The Cartesian square allows you to make a balanced decision consciously by considering the problem from four different points of view.

Bowel movement

Bowel movements are an important indicator for determining what is happening in the body. The gut microbiome influences the immune system, brain, hormone levels, and almost every other function and system in the body, so maintaining a healthy gut is critical. The frequency, appearance, or changes in bowel movements can give us some insight into how healthy the gut really is.

Talk to your doctor if you think your bowel movements are abnormal or have changed, and think about how often you go to the toilet or how certain foods and lifestyle changes affect your movements.

How to make key decisions in your personal life?

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There are two approaches to help you make the right choice: logical and intuitive. In the first case, you need to carefully consider all the options and consequences. Using this approach, you can think through the pros and cons, and analyze the likely benefits and losses of potential options.

It is possible to rely on logic when all the initial information is available and the consequences can be predicted. Typically, the approach is used when the likelihood of risks is high and the results of decision-making are determinable, for example, in business.

The following scheme can be used:

How to make key decisions in your personal life?

But there are situations when it is almost impossible to imagine how events will develop in the future. There is no previous experience and no opportunity to obtain and analyze information from other sources. And you need to make a choice quickly. In such a situation, there is only one thing left to do - listen to your intuition.

You can also use effective psychological techniques to make a decision.

"Glass of water"

The method of American parapsychologist Jose Silva is typically intuitive, and, despite its non-standard nature, it works:

  1. In the evening, before going to bed, take a glass of clean, unboiled water.
  2. Holding it in both palms, we close our eyes and concentrate on the problem that worries us.
  3. We clearly formulate the issue that needs to be resolved.
  4. Slowly, we drink half a glass, repeating in our thoughts something like this: “This is all that is necessary to make the right decision.”
  5. We place the glass with the rest of the water next to the bed and go to bed.
  6. The next morning, when we wake up, we first drink water and thank the subconscious for the right choice.

A good idea on how to deal with the problem will come immediately after waking up or throughout the day.

"Expanding Options"

Often a person is “stuck” on making one decision: “YES or NO”, “Do or NOT do.” Focusing on this, he does not take other options into account. In a simple example it looks like this. A person is debating whether to buy his dream car on credit or continue using public transport. An alternative to traveling by bus is to purchase an inexpensive car without a loan.

"Good advice"

The human psyche is like this: we easily give the right advice to our acquaintances, but in a similar situation we ourselves act unreasonably. This is due to the fact that when we think about the choice of another person, we notice only the most significant. But when it comes to ourselves, we obsess over the little things. To free yourself from the influence of insignificant things, when making a decision, you need to think about what you would recommend to a friend in a similar situation.

"Delay"

If you can't make a choice, take a break. When the brain is excited and overloaded with information, it is difficult to make the right decision. To avoid the consequences of a wrong choice, take a break, calm down, and once again analyze the pros and cons. There are not too many situations in everyday life that require immediate resolution - don’t be afraid to give yourself a reprieve.

Endangered professions

Due to the rapid pace of development of robotics and technology, some professions are at risk of extinction; below we will look at why.

Courier

It is obvious that robots and drones will soon replace the simplest professions; for example, some US restaurants are already practicing food delivery by helicopter without human intervention.

Thanks to the development of GPS and automation, soon delivery will be prompt and always accurate, we are waiting.

Accountant

In a few years, businesses won't have to use accountants because everything will be electronic. Payment information will go into the database, where the system itself will calculate the tax and send the data to the bank.

This will make life easier for all businessmen and eliminate paperwork, as well as eliminate the possibility of mistakes as with a live accountant, because there is a human factor.

Lawyer

It would seem like justice. How can justice be restored without a person, a judge, a lawyer, a lawyer. It turned out that it is possible. People are being replaced by AI, or simply artificial intelligence.

The system contains millions of cases, decisions made by human judges, in different countries and with different circumstances. AI learns, compares cases and solutions and, having gained enough experience in a few years, will independently decide destinies.

Do not rush to get upset, the main advantage of such a life will be the inability to bribe the robot, which means that a richer opponent will not be able to solve the problem with money.

Bank employee

Take a look at your smartphone, most likely you will find a bank application there, mobile banking. It is because of this that the profession of a banker is losing relevance. Applications, terminals, maps, systems are gradually replacing people. All operations are carried out via the Internet in a couple of clicks.

The profession of a bank employee will be one of the first to lose relevance, from cashiers to management levels.

Journalist-copywriter

One of the few reasons where the AI ​​is not to blame. People are becoming lazier, in a few years we will stop reading long articles like this, we will watch everything in video formats, stories and other sources that are faster for obtaining information.

Driver

Probably only the lazy have not heard about the news that in the USA they are already testing cars without drivers. They are equipped with hundreds of sensors and a computer that analyzes all the information received.

Thanks to all this, as well as the sets of driving rules introduced into the system, the AI ​​learns from its mistakes and drives the car without violations, safer than a regular driver. It’s not worth choosing this profession in 2020.

Traffic police inspector

Already today we are receiving fines for exceeding and crossing lines, what can we say about the future. Smart systems will record all violations independently, recognize the driver’s level of concentration and excitement by the driver’s facial expressions, and compare these emotions with millions of others, determining whether the driver is adequate at the moment or not.

The only relevant service, probably, will be one that will be responsible for intercepting an unwanted vehicle, unless the roads are equipped with something like retractable spikes.

Translator

Speech recognition technologies do not stand still. Each of us has access to an online translator, at least from Google and voice typing, for example Yandex.Alice, and translating the text we hear into another language is not a problem.

Returning to AI, machines will learn to avoid mistakes and will produce a clean result almost instantly after pronouncing.

Realtor

There is no need for this profession for a long time. With the advent of large aggregators on the Internet, the search for real estate moved online, and realtors remained needed only to help in collecting documents. But it won't last long. Soon, all document flow will move to the Internet, and then it will be as easy as shelling pears to receive the necessary documents and send them to someone, and brokers will lose market share.

What to do if you are in doubt: whether to change jobs or not?

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If you haven’t been happy with your job for a long time, and every morning you dread the production atmosphere you’ll have to plunge into again, maybe it’s finally time to quit? Such difficult decisions should not be made thoughtlessly.

Advice comes from Debra Davenport, PhD, a senior professional career coach and president of DavenportFolio, an entrepreneurial coaching company. She suggests answering a checklist to assess your current situation before making a life-changing decision:

  1. I look forward to going to work almost every day. (ABOUT)
  2. The employer treats me fairly and with respect. (ABOUT)
  3. I live on weekends or any days away from work. (U)
  4. I feel valued as a professional. (ABOUT)
  5. My workplace feels like it's been poisoned. (U)
  6. I can be myself at work and not worry about being judged. (ABOUT)
  7. I am included in the company's information cycle. (ABOUT)
  8. The employer provides opportunities for development and advanced training. (ABOUT)
  9. I don't feel disgusted if there is a need to work extra. (ABOUT)
  10. My work stimulates me intellectually and creatively. (ABOUT)
  11. I feel like I am making a positive contribution to society. (ABOUT)
  12. I get paid well. (ABOUT)
  13. I often find myself daydreaming about a new career. (U)
  14. I feel like my work is a natural extension of who I am. (ABOUT)
  15. I feel successful. (ABOUT)
  16. I feel trapped and stuck in my current situation. (U)
  17. I can count on career growth. (ABOUT)
  18. I like to work as hard as I can. (ABOUT)
  19. My work activities have a negative impact on my loved ones. (U)
  20. I have a desire to try something new and unusual. (U)

If you answered “YES” to the questions under the letter “O”, which means “Stay”, you need to wait a while before changing jobs. If “U” - “Leave” is in the lead, it’s worth taking a closer look at the vacant offers.

Nutrients

Reality check: Counting calories doesn't tell you much about our health. Each body requires a different calorie intake, and each calorie looks different in the body (for example, 1,000 calories of soda will be very different from 1,000 calories of spinach). But when we know about nutrients (such as vitamins, macros, antioxidants, phytochemicals, etc.) and what they do for the body (such as providing energy, increasing skin radiance, or reducing inflammation), we can use food. as a tool for achieving maximum well-being.

Focusing on more nutrients can also subconsciously push out processed and sugary foods (completely guilt-free). Consider adding more whole foods to your diet (like adding kale to a pasta dish or eating berries for breakfast) to get more healing nutrients.

How to decide to move to another place?

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Although the world is full of magical places, we spend most of our lives in only one, apart from going on vacation. But sometimes everything gets boring, and we start thinking about moving. This step seems scary, but getting out of your comfort zone is the best way to learn and grow.

Making decisions about moving is not easy. First you need to analyze the strengths and weaknesses of the choice:

  • Why You Need It? Doubts mean that not all issues have yet been resolved.
  • What do you like and dislike about where you currently live? What are you afraid of losing? Take a notepad and write down the pros and cons. It will be clear whether you are able to mitigate such problems.
  • What do you expect to find in your new location? Moving from one city to a similar locality will essentially change little. If you want dramatic changes, you need to move to a populated area with a different population density.
  • What is your family expecting? Evaluate the future financial capabilities, the availability of medical care in the new place, the availability of good kindergartens, schools and universities, and the ability to satisfy other social needs.

It must be borne in mind that it is those close to you who usually prevent you from making an important decision about changing your place of residence. Therefore, the whole family must prepare for the move, carefully discussing every worrying moment.

Carry out the analysis not mentally, but on paper. This will make it easier to work through each point. For example, find pen pals on social networks, find out real estate prices, visit sites with job offers, and estimate the salary level in the region in your specialty. You should also calculate the cost of relocation, the demand for the profession in the labor market, or the conditions for developing your own business.

How to decide to move, psychologist Natalya Tolstaya tells in the video:

How to act if it is difficult to make any decisions?

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The easiest way to quickly make decisions in difficult situations is to put aside your fears and step forward.

The psychological characteristics of a person are such that the fear of making decisions paralyzes us. We fear the outcome, analyzing it to such an extent that we end up frozen in misery.

Attention! The key to getting out of this deep freeze is to face these fears and give them names.

Write down the worst things that can happen. For example, you have problems with your spouse and you want to express your grievances. But you are afraid that this will lead to a big quarrel and even divorce. See if you can handle this worst case scenario? By reflecting on this, you can see that although your fears are rigid, they can also be manageable.

Method 10/10/10

Former Harvard Business Review editor and popular author, television commentator, and journalist Susie Welch has invented a simple tool that can help you move forward. The method is called 10/10/10 and is described in the book with the same title . The author advises thinking about the choice you are about to make in three different time frames:

  • How will you feel about it in 10 minutes?
  • How about 10 months later?
  • And in 10 years?

This tool helps you see things from a new perspective and ensures that regret does not become a part of life. If we can anticipate the negative consequences of the choices we make now, we can change the path to a better one.

Creative visualization

Psychology suggests using the method of creative visualization for speedy decision-making. Ask yourself, how do you define personal success? Write your answer in a journal or on a piece of paper. Then visualize your ideal, future self. Do this by taking a relaxed position, closing your eyes and allowing your mind to wander into daydreams.

Describe to yourself what you see and feel. Thanks to this technique, you can imagine what you want to achieve at this stage, and what you can sacrifice when making decisions.

TED Talker Technique

If all else fails, the TED Talker technique created by Ruth Chang will help you get out of stagnation. Write down all the advantages and disadvantages of the result of making and not making a decision. It works especially well if a person is stuck at a fork in the road and cannot choose between two marriage proposals, two jobs, or two schools for children.

How to make a difficult decision using the Ruth Chang method - on video:

Method 10. “Intuition”

Intuition is a wonderful tool that not everyone knows how to use. She can tell you a way out when rational methods do not bring the desired result. And it often happens like this: you make a choice based on logic and rationality, and this choice seems to you the most correct, but your inner voice persistently protests against it. Maybe we should listen to him?

Develop intuition, and it will become an excellent assistant in different situations, but do not overestimate its role and do not forget about reason and logic.

If you find yourself in a situation of choice, use any of the listed methods, or better yet, use several at once. Over time, you will understand which method suits you best and will be able to use it in a variety of life situations. By learning to make decisions, you will significantly improve the quality of your life.

What books will help indecisive people?

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In addition to the already mentioned book “10/10/10”, there are other printed guides on the topic of decision making. Three of them are a must read.

"Think Slowly... Decide Fast" by Daniel Kahneman . Doctor of Philosophy, psychologist and Nobel Prize winner in economics studied human behavior for many years and came to the conclusion that only the simultaneous use of the instinctive and rational parts of the mind during decision-making will allow one to quickly make the right choice in any situation. His guidance will be useful in all areas of life: from solving everyday problems to major business strategies. It is especially useful for those who always put off making important decisions.

"Think Slowly... Decide Fast" by Daniel Kahneman

"Switch" by Chip Heath and Dan Heese . The authors of the book believe that on a subconscious level we seem to block ourselves from achieving important changes in business or in our personal lives, and therefore we cannot make the right decisions in a timely manner. The conflict between rational and emotional thinking is to blame. The guide contains practical techniques on how to resolve it.

"Switch" by Chip Heath and Dan Heese

"The Right Choice" by John Hammond, Ralph Keeney and Howard Raiffa. A practical guide to decision making in business with specific techniques and methods. The book gives answers to any question: which strategy to prefer for entrepreneurship, which applicant to hire, when to launch a new project.

"The Right Choice" by John Hammond, Ralph Keeney and Howard Raiffa

Current professions of 2020

Any profession has pros and cons. To choose the right one, you need to consider the options comprehensively and determine your aspirations. Below is a list of professions that will be relevant in the coming years, because it takes time to become a professional, and if you choose the wrong direction, then there is a high risk of finding yourself without a job, even though you are a highly qualified specialist.

IT professions

The development of technology is reflected in the popularity of works. Technical specialties remain popular. There is an increasing demand for masters in the following fields:

  • Engineer. Especially in the field of materials processing;
  • IT-specialist. There is a shortage of personnel;
  • Robotics specialist. Replace manual labor with robotic labor in various areas;
  • Design engineer. Create construction projects;
  • Agricultural engineer. The agro-industrial sector is being developed.

Popular sales professions:

  • Marketer. Without a specialist, the company loses profit and cannot cover the relevant market area;
  • Designer. Products, websites, products;
  • Internet marketer. Promotes products on the Internet;
  • PR specialist. Creates a positive image of the company. Promotes the brand;
  • Business analyst. Improves the development process of companies, develops a plan, helps with implementation.

Who to study after 11th grade in the healthcare field:

  • Doctor of narrow specialization. Demand for professionals has always exceeded supply. This will not change in the coming years.
  • Biotechnologist. The industry is developing rapidly and personnel are needed.
  • Pharmacist. Investments in the industry are increasing every year.
  • Microbiologist. Employers are looking for good employees. Demand is high.

Do not lose relevance:

  1. Locksmith . Workers are always required. Good workers receive decent wages.
  2. Electrician. There are not enough craftsmen, they are constantly needed.
  3. Welder. Thanks to economic growth, the demand for specialists is increasing.
  4. Driver. New roads are being built, personnel are needed.

How do you know what to choose if you’re not drawn to anything? Consider the options, speaking out loud about each one.

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