How to create and maintain trust in a relationship with a man ⇒ Blog of Yaroslav Samoilov

Does a man persistently check your phone and social networks? Questions, nagging, scenes of jealousy... Or maybe you torment him with endless calls, “Where are you?”, “Who are you with?” These are the most obvious symptoms of mistrust, which are quite capable of destroying your relationship.

Doubts, suspicions, resentments, violation of personal boundaries - such relationships become a trap for both partners. The problem must be solved urgently before it is too late!

From this article you will learn:

Why do women find it difficult to trust their partner?
Loss of trust. Opinion of psychologist Alla Demidenko
TEST Are your suspicions justified? Relationship trust test
Women's fears: where do they come from?
How to regain trust? 7 steps
How to understand that your partner is losing trust in you
Signs of male mistrust
How to regain your trust

About trust

What is trust? Imagine the situation: a dad throws or spins a child around the room. He laughs merrily and enjoys the flight. The baby doesn’t even think that he won’t be caught, that he will be dropped, that he will be hurt. This is unlimited trust.

What happens in adult life? Imagine that a person you trust blindfolds you and says: “Fall, I’ll catch you!”, and at the last moment simply steps aside. You fall, hit the sinful ground painfully, but most importantly, you learn a lesson: you cannot trust. And with each misdemeanor of your partner, this attitude grows deeper and deeper in your soul. Even if the offender is replaced by a sensitive, understanding man, you will need a lot of effort to fall into his arms without fear.

What trust gives:

Confidence that your partner's words, actions, and intentions are true.
You can freely share your experiences and emotions and at the same time know that you will be understood correctly and not judged.
You know that everything said will remain between you.
In difficult times, you will not be left without support.
You feel safe. The family really becomes your fortress, and not a house of cards that will fall apart due to the slightest trouble.
You don’t get nervous over trifles, you maintain spiritual harmony and balance.

The only downside to trust is that it is very fragile. It is very easy to destroy a trusting relationship: tell a lie a couple of times (even a small one, and for the good), give reasons for jealousy, indifferently brush aside your partner’s problems... So I definitely do not advise testing love to the limit.

No one is born with the ability to build good relationships without mistakes.

This is what you will learn in this five-day free online course! Register now

The second thing that is most important in a relationship between a guy and a girl is trust.

Trusting relationships are assessed as safe, reliable, committed and predictable.

But for various reasons, various forms of mistrust may arise in a couple. They become the basis for the development of jealousy, suspicion, coldness, increased control and even aggression.

In this case, it is important to talk and not remain silent:

about your feelings;
that something is bothering you;
that there is no confidence in the reliability and sincerity of the relationship.

If you let everything take its course, then very soon the union will become tiresome for both. One of the partners will constantly torment himself and the other, and will also be in a constant search for evidence of infidelity and insincerity.

If you have doubts or worries, you should always talk to your significant other about them.

Why do women find it difficult to trust their partner?

Here is a girl who grew up in a wonderful family, but met a fool who broke her heart. And the gullibility that had been cultivated in her for years disappeared in an instant. Here's a woman who didn't have the best relationship with her father, brother, or first boyfriend. She resembled a bristling hedgehog who would not show her tender belly to anyone. But on her way she met a real MAN: kind, patient, strong. Which I wanted to BELIEVE. Do you understand what we're talking about?

Loss of trust. Opinion of psychologist Alla Demidenko

– There are several levels of trust. If we enter into a relationship, but there is no trust in a man initially, this can be caused by two factors: either the girl already has programs and beliefs (parental scenarios, basic mistrust as a result of childhood or teenage traumas), or good intuition and in some way to the extent she protects her when choosing men. That is, she sees a guy, and an inner voice says: he cannot be trusted. But that doesn't happen either.

When we are already in a relationship, we may lose trust. Why?

The man does not fulfill his obligations.
You rely on him, but he disappoints you. You ask him - he doesn’t do it, he promised - and didn’t fulfill it. His actions do not correspond to what he declares.
Justified and unfounded suspicion.
The man begins to behave strangely, does not answer calls, is late at work, he receives SMS in the middle of the night - and he says “Wrong number” or “Doesn’t matter,” and he avoids your direct questions. If you observe this behavior for a long time, your mistrust is justified, if for a couple of days, it is important not to draw premature conclusions. Perhaps your partner is upset or has problems that he wants to protect you from. And to solve the problem, you need to talk openly.

How to understand whether your trust is justified or not?

To help you find the answer, we have prepared a test.

The most terrible topic is when trust is lost as a result of betrayal
. In this case, it is important to understand what provoked this situation, why the man cheated, why did this happen in your relationship? Responsibility is always shared 50/50. We study these questions in the course “Man: Honest Instructions,” so register and learn to build correct and harmonious relationships.

Trust can only be restored if both partners are ready to move forward and restore what was lost. You will need the help of a psychologist, you need to build an open dialogue, an open relationship in which the woman sees what the man does for her as compensation for what happened. For her part, the spouse also does everything possible to restore balance, the loss of which caused the loss of trust.

If the pain is so strong that you are not ready to continue building a relationship with a man, it needs to be completed. But first, work with the pain, accept the situation, learn a lesson about why it happened - and only after that make a decision. Never cut from the shoulder, even if the man went “to the left”, there is always an explanation for this. If a partner had been faithful for many years, he wouldn’t change it just like that.

How can trust be undermined?

There are some things you really shouldn't tell your spouse. But these should not be some secrets that could pop out and have a negative impact in the future. Just don’t talk about things that will be unpleasant for your husband, but the problem will not be solved.

For example. Your mother doesn't like her son-in-law very much. In front of him she purrs, and behind him she grumbles: “Hands don’t grow from there, she can’t make a career for herself.” This is my mother’s opinion, it cannot be changed, but do not bring this opinion into the family. It’s neither your nor your husband’s fault, and the problem cannot be eliminated.

There is an expression - a white lie. And even such a science as psychology teaches us not to neglect this “life preserver.” But it is only good in three cases:

When the problem goes away without affecting the family. Well, just like the mother-in-law and son-in-law. She is at least purr-purr with him, which means there is no danger of enmity, and therefore there is no topic for discussion.
When you want to surprise your loved one for a holiday. He builds some suspicions in his head about where you are disappearing, what kind of secrets you have, and then: “Surprise!” for his birthday!
If there is a medical secret. The diagnosis was made terrible, but it has not been confirmed. You can’t tell your husband - maybe he’ll commit suicide and the diagnosis won’t be confirmed. I have to pull myself together and lie to my husband.

Everything else can be decided together. Little lies always give rise to big doubts! Therefore, if you accidentally blurted something out to your husband (this does not apply to the three problems listed above), then it is better to finish speaking than to lie.

As for trust in finances, there must be an agreement within the family itself - what goes into the common piggy bank, what can be put into your own pockets. And this is correct, because a man should have some money of his own in reserve, so that he would not be ashamed at least in front of his friends and colleagues. Don't ask him for a loan right after he gets paid!

If this does not happen, and the wife scrapes out every penny, then the man tries to make a nest egg, and the wife tries to find it. Where is the trust here? Aw! It doesn't even smell like them. This is the brick that was removed from the facade of the built relationship and the “house” begins to collapse.

It's the same in love. Suspicions and jealousy out of nowhere. Why should a person make excuses for something he didn’t do? Read about this in the article How to find out if your husband is cheating.

A small nuance. Everything that you and your spouse discuss in secret within the family should be a sealed secret for others. This is also the essence of trust.

Women's fears: where do they come from?

Most often, your internal programs come into play, which simply do not allow you to relax, remove your armor and show a man your weaknesses.

Parental patterns. Imagine the situation: the girl Marina was raised by a single mother, who was very offended by her father and men in general. The best thing her daughter heard from her was “All men are assholes, like your daddy.” In fact, mom did Marina a disservice: she firmly hammered into the girl’s subconscious that men are dangerous people, you can’t trust them, because at any moment you can be betrayed. Similar attitudes are passed on to children in which the father beat the mother, cheated on her, or did not respect her as a woman.
Distrust of men. Olya was dating a guy. First love, walks under the moon, flowers and candies. Everything is sweet and romantic. But while walking with a friend, I completely accidentally went into a cafe, and there, like in a bad joke, my beloved kisses another. Then it’s clear: scandal, separation, tears. And the subconscious confidence that men are traitors. And the girl already looks at any boyfriend through the prism of mistrust.
Low self-esteem. When a woman does not love and accept her essence, she does not consider herself worthy of a normal relationship. “He’s too good for me,” “Well, look at us, we don’t look like a couple: he’s handsome, and I’m a gray mouse.” It’s better not to let him get too close initially: if he leaves, it won’t hurt so much.
Basic distrust of the world. Negative attitudes of society, sad experiences of friends and acquaintances. A man offended someone, laughed at someone, cheated on someone - these fears accumulate and prevent normal relationships from being built. Such women are always on the alert: if they stay late at work, they cheat, if they don’t keep their promises, they will definitely betray them in difficult times. This suspiciousness and suspiciousness destroys relationships.
Intuitive mistrust. Intuition is a good thing, but sometimes it fails. And the man unfairly faces your fears and suspicions. Unreasonable mistrust easily destroys relationships.

If fears appeared after you entered into a relationship, there are reasons for this.

Unjustified expectations. For a long time Anya did not understand that she lived with a boy and not with a man. He often promised, but did not fulfill, he forgot to meet her from work, nail a shelf in the bathroom, take the child to kindergarten. At first, she turned everything into a joke, forgave me, and did it herself. And then she realized that the strong shoulder she had dreamed of was not nearby. There is a boy who needs to be guided, controlled, educated. But there is no trust in him. It is the ability to be responsible for one’s words and actions that makes a man a MAN. And if your partner does not want to take responsibility, perhaps this is just not the man for you?
The desire to control everything. Masha sincerely believed that there should be complete trust in the family. I just confused trust with total control. If you’re late, call and report, put a password on your phone, tell it to your wife, she doesn’t want anything bad for you. Masha believed that she had the right to know about all her husband’s affairs, conversations, meetings and movements. An overbearing mother, problematic previous relationships, societal attitudes that a woman should be strong and strong-willed - Masha has many reasons to be an iron lady. But the husband is tired of the constant dictatorship: it seems like he didn’t do anything - and you still feel guilty. He began to hide, lie, and defend his point of view. And the relationship somehow imperceptibly found itself on the verge of divorce.
Betrayal. The woman has already experienced pain and does not want it to happen again. Alina lived 10 happy years of marriage. Her husband carried her in his arms and showered her with flowers. An accident helped to find out the truth: the flight was canceled, the girl returned home and found her lovers in all their glory. Now Alina does not trust men. She sees each of them as a potential traitor. And the beautiful young woman remains lonely because she doesn’t want the old story to repeat itself.

Destructive factors

Certain factors are more likely to lead to the end. They can be avoided if each partner works on themselves and intimacy.

Factors that spoil relationships include:

Criticism. It is impossible to endure constant dissatisfaction and reproaches from your significant other for a long time. At the heart of criticism is a loss of respect. This problem can destroy the most reverent intimacy. With loss of interest and feelings, a functional union can be maintained, but lack of respect inevitably ends in failure. Partners turn into real enemies who find it difficult to overcome themselves in order to make peace and begin to respect each other again. The situation can only be changed through joint efforts. If only one party actively meets halfway, looks for attractive qualities in the chosen one, then the relationship is doomed.
Distance. People don’t ask about each other’s past day, health, or experiences. Sometimes such coldness comes from one partner. In response to questions, he remains melancholy or aggressively silent. It is difficult to discuss problems with an indifferent person; the emotional distance here only increases. This is due to loss of feelings and interest. In this phase, a person tries to notice differences, whereas previously he saw only similarities. Psychologists talk about a repetition of the crisis that every child experiences when leaving the zone of influence of his father and mother. Such a fracture is natural. You can survive it if you still have respect. It is worth looking for common ground, getting to know each other.
Negativism. It is difficult to coexist with an inveterate pessimist or with an overly unstable person. Constant emotional shocks and exaggeration of problems are depressing. Sometimes it is impossible to convince such individuals. If one partner revels in pessimism, then the other will suffer emotional devastation. When negativism manifests itself in two people in the same way, it can even bring them closer. Often a person demonstrates dissatisfaction with life only next to his companion, out of spite. This is an indicator of loss of interest and respect for the chosen one. It is worth discussing the problem openly.

Relationships are a difficult test. In long-term unions, the positive aspects of a personality and its shortcomings are revealed, so obstacles are inevitable. It is worth preparing to fight, but not with each other, but for happiness.

What does loss of trust in a relationship lead to?

Mistrust destroys even long-lasting and reliable relationships. Secrets, suspicions, nagging, far-fetched fears simply do not allow you to relax. Partners seem to be living on a powder keg: a wrong step, a word - and everything will explode. In such a relationship, both are unhappy.

The guilty (or unfairly accused) constantly faces pressure and moral destruction (phone checking, scandals, surveillance, etc.).
The distrustful half is always in tension. He lashes out at loved ones, becomes depressed, and develops heart disease.

If you turn a blind eye to the problem and hope that trust will return by itself, divorce will loom on the horizon. You will get tired of playing detective, and he will get tired of feeling guilty.

There are two ways to solve the problem:

Try to maintain the relationship. But not alone. The partner should also be interested in this. The couple needs to work through their pains, complaints, grievances and suspicions and begin to build a relationship in which there is no place for secrets and omissions.
Separate, do not torture yourself or your partner. Just ask yourself a simple question: can you trust him again? The answer is “no”; it would be better to end the relationship without wasting your time, resources and energy on it.

Relationships need work, and it's better to start right now.

What is most important in a relationship

Of course, love is something without which a happy marriage is impossible.
It must be protected and stored. But every couple one day faces trials of fate. Problems lead to the fact that feelings subside, a man and a woman are faced with the need to overcome difficulties. If this works out, then a new and stronger connection is born, in which everyone understands that they can rely on their partner. If difficulties become insurmountable, then everything ends in divorce. In order to overcome all adversities together with dignity, the couple must remember other important criteria for a strong relationship. Articles on the topic

Why is it important to know and follow the rules of communication with foreigners?
17.08.2020
Personal non-property relations: features of legal regulation
24.06.2020
An important part of family relationships is the rights of the child in the family.
15.06.2020
Why family values are relevant at any time
10.06.2020

Do you want a decent man? Then remember this phrase: “you are a smart man.”

Every man considers himself smart. But many girls think that if you give such compliments to men, then he will relax, he will sit on his neck. Just try it. You can try this in any situation. The man talks a lot. What does he want to hear? He wants to hear how smart he is. Mom didn't tell him.

How did most mothers raise their sons? “You’re bad, you’re doing it wrong, you’re doing it badly.” And she thinks that now I will criticize him, and he will become better. And you also look at your mother, grow up and think that you need to criticize your husband, a man on a date, and then he will have a desire to become better.

Do you want to know what a man needs to make you happy? Sign up for the free online course “Man: Honest Instructions”

How to regain trust? 7 steps

Trust will not return with a snap of your fingers; you have serious work ahead of you. And you need to start by discussing the problem.

Talk. It's like ripping a Band-Aid off an open wound: it hurts at first, but it's a path to healing. It is useful to contact a specialist: he will help you identify your internal complaints and blocks and get rid of them. Explain to your partner what doesn't suit you in the relationship and listen to his point of view. Look for a compromise, build relationships so that both parties feel comfortable. No secrets, no reproaches, no surveillance.

Stay honest. In any situation. Even a small white lie can hurt and wound. It all starts with little things: “Well, honey, these are old shoes, you just haven’t seen them,” the woman gets out, frantically hiding the check in her pocket. After all, she had previously promised that she would not be a spender. It gradually becomes easier to lie, but even experienced liars get caught. And they themselves will destroy their family.
Personal responsibility. For your words, actions and thoughts. A person who talks but doesn't act will never gain trust. Responsibility is evidence of personality maturity. If your partner cannot be relied upon and he is not ready to work on his shortcomings, this will lead to further destruction of the relationship.
Personal space. And he must be treated with respect. This means: don’t take his phone without asking (no matter how much you want to), don’t control his movements and give him freedom of choice. If suspicions creep in, tell your partner about it. Only if you can build a transparent relationship will trust return.
Pay attention to each other. It’s so easy to come back from work and sit down to play war games or surf social networks. The family turns into a purely nominal unit; partners do not receive attention, support, or warmth from each other. Make a simple rule: spend time with your loved ones, at least half an hour. Share problems and joys, hug, talk about abstract topics. Learn to restrain yourself, even if “I told you so,” “I was right.” You are not critics for each other, but help and support.
Don't betray your trust. It's not just about cheating. There is no need to discuss your relationships with other people, or reveal secrets and plans that your partner has entrusted to you. Every person wants to know that there are those who will always be on their side.
Look at the world positively. Don’t look for a double bottom in every action or word. Affirmations (positive statements) help change your attitude towards life. If you send love and kindness to the world, you receive the same feelings in return. If you accumulate grievances, live in constant stress, and wait for a stab in the back, you are programming your subconscious to be negative. And you get this negativity.

How trust is gained

Do you remember how, as a child, your parents taught you the game of Tumbler? With your eyes closed, you fell backwards and were sure that your dad or mom would catch you from behind. How else? Your loved ones will not let you fall and hurt yourself.

You have grown up, but even at the age of an adult mature girl, you are looking for that person who will not let you fall. Only in a moral sense.

Having fallen in love with a man, you involuntarily check whether you can trust him:

Do you monitor his behavior, does he stare at your friends or does he allow himself to flirt to the left?
You turn to him with small assignments, and as a result of their execution, you draw a conclusion - whether the guy keeps his word.
You check a man for “SOS” - call him in emergency situations. The speed of his help is equal to the greater number of points in trust. That's physics.

Perhaps you yourself don’t notice how this man checks you for lice. This is how this trust is gained, little by little, little by little. But here there is a small nuance - in both cases there must be purity of thoughts and not an ounce of self-interest. Otherwise, all this trust is an ordinary fake.

By the way, you will read where love begins and how not to destroy it in the article How to build a relationship with a man.

You may also be interested in: How to love your husband again if your feelings gradually cool down

How can you tell if your partner is losing trust in you?

Remember the saying about the speck in someone else's eye and the log in yours? This is the truth of life. Your partner’s misdeeds are much easier to notice than your own. We do not pay attention to alarming symptoms and only realize it when trust is almost lost.

1. Signs of male mistrust

Jealousy. If you didn’t give a reason, it means that jealousy is caused by his internal complexes and doubts. However, often a man has a reason. Some women sincerely believe that jealousy manipulation strengthens marriage. Wink at a random passerby, ask a friend to accompany you home, go to a corporate party alone... Simple techniques have one goal: to show a man - value, love and take care, otherwise he will take you away. At first, the scheme works: he is jealous, surrounds you with care and showers you with gifts. But gradually the relationship burns out, trust disappears from it.

Stealth. He used to share his plans, ideas and discoveries with you and suddenly stopped. He has become a stranger, distant, and it is becoming increasingly difficult to reach him. Unfair criticism, accusations, lack of support - these are serious reasons for a man to withdraw into himself and withdraw. You have turned from a confidant into an irritant.

Indifference. If a man who ardently defended his opinion and was ready to defend you until his last breath suddenly became apathetic and indifferent, he is most likely offended. And a cold mask is only a defensive reaction.

Violation of personal space. A man can look into your laptop and phone, drop you off and pick you up from work, insist that you go to all holidays together. Sets conditions, prohibitions, expresses claims.

Trying to manipulate you. Requires proof of love and fidelity in a way that suits him. “If you love me, you won’t go to the holiday alone.” He has fears and suspicions, but he does not make open accusations.

2. How to regain trust in yourself?

Actually, everything is the same - through dialogue and searching for compromise solutions. Take care to create a comfortable atmosphere in which there is no place for criticism, sarcasm, claims, accusations and quarrels. A man needs to know that you are his ally, not a rival or critic. Play on the same team. Think about it: perhaps you were too selfish towards your partner. They evaluated him according to fictitious criteria, considered his opinion less significant, and were not interested in his problems. This needs to change.

If the issue of jealousy is acute, form boundaries. Keep your distance from colleagues, do not flirt with other men. Meanwhile, defend your personal space: explain that gatherings with friends or chatting on Instagram are your women’s affairs, which do not affect the man at all. Be honest with him, don’t let him lie.

Help your partner fight his fears and complexes. Be there, support him, give him positive emotions. Don't give him a reason to doubt you.

If you can rebuild the foundation of trust in your relationship, your family life will definitely improve!

Do you still have questions, doubts, complaints? Do you want to revive your relationship, but are not confident in your own abilities?

Register for the free online course “Man: Honest Instructions” - the best online workshop for women who want to build a serious and happy relationship without drama and manipulation.

Thank you for reading this article to the end.

Hello, my name is Yaroslav Samoilov. I am an expert in the psychology of relationships and over the years of practice I have helped more than 10,000 girls meet worthy soul mates, build harmonious relationships and return love and understanding to families that were on the verge of divorce.
More than anything, I am inspired by the happy eyes of students who meet the people of their dreams and enjoy a truly vibrant life.
My goal is to show women a way to develop relationships that will help them create a synergy of success and happiness!

Love without loss: How to avoid mistakes at the beginning of a relationship

Everything that happens in Transbaikalia and the city of Chita

The beginning of a love relationship is the most difficult, although very pleasant period. Why complicated? Because it is at the beginning of the novel that the relationship between a man and a woman is so fragile that the spark from which the flame has not yet flared up can easily go out because of any trifle. Psychologist Maxim Razdobreev spoke about how not to ruin a relationship from the very beginning.

The psychology of relations between a man and a woman, like any process occurring on Earth, has certain stages. There are many of them, but today we will talk about only one – the initial one.

It's easy to guess that any relationship begins with attraction. A man, captivated by a woman’s charms, begins to show signs of attention to the woman. He feels her disposition towards him, as she reacts to these signs.

At first timidly, and then more and more confidently, he continues to court the most special woman in the world for him. Admiring her external beauty, the man gradually tries to get to know the woman better. At this stage, the so-called candy-bouquet period begins.

A woman is designed in such a way that she is attracted to a man based not only on his external data and physical form. He attracts her with his intelligence, responsibility and self-confidence. Meeting such a man, a woman gladly accepts his attentions. For her part, she does everything possible to maintain a man’s interest in her person.

It is at this stage in the process of getting to know each other that both parties tend to make mistakes that can lead to a break.

In general, according to Maxim Razdobreev, relationships should not begin with insincerity and manipulation. This applies to both partners. But more specifically, all mistakes made can be divided into male and female.

"No! - she agreed"

When a woman really likes a man, she always gets excited. It’s just that excessive emotions and fears of doing something wrong lead them to a lot of mistakes that contribute to a breakup.

Error 1

: "artificiality". We have already mentioned this factor as “insincerity,” and this is exactly what we are talking about here. If a woman, wanting to make the best impression, begins to behave in ways that are not typical of her real self, then either the man will notice this and be disappointed in her, or the relationship will turn into theater. But everyone knows that theater performances tend to end after the second or third act.

Error 2

: “I decided everything for the two of us.” Typical situation. Having just met a man, a woman has already planned a serious relationship, a wedding, children and a happy old age. But the man doesn’t even know about it. Suddenly he just likes a woman, and he wouldn’t mind having sex with her, but not going down the aisle.

Error 3

: when a woman provokes her partner with jealousy. This factor is called “jealousy as manipulation.” At this stage of the relationship, the man will adequately evaluate such behavior and treat the woman accordingly.

It is a known fact that this type of manipulation is often used by insecure women in order to raise their value in the eyes of the man they like.

Error 4

: violation of personal space. This factor alone can ruin any relationship, not just romantic ones. Each partner should have personal space. This mistake doesn't only apply to women.

It may seem strange, but the errors in women and men are similar, only they manifest themselves differently.

"A man is always right"

Having met a girl who managed to attract attention, men also try to like her, show their feelings and, often without realizing it, make mistakes that can quickly lead to the opposite effect and a break in the relationship.

Error 1

: diffidence. Women prefer confident men. If he constantly doubts and adapts only to the desires of a woman, she quickly loses interest in him. A man who is self-confident, knows how to make decisions and take responsibility, has a much greater chance of receiving a reciprocal feeling than one who, constantly doubting, seeks approval from a woman.

Error 2

: rudeness. Any manifestations of bad manners prevent people from understanding each other. If a man allows himself to be rude, it can be assumed that he does not respect his companion and does not strive to make a favorable impression on her. After all, the more serious a man’s intentions are, the more attentive and affectionate he becomes towards his chosen one.

Error 3

: One of the biggest mistakes men make in relationships with women is insisting on physical intimacy. As a rule, this type of man is not inclined to think about the feelings of other people. It is important for them to establish themselves and get the desired result. In most cases, with this approach, a serious relationship with a girl is not planned at all. It is only a means for one’s own self-realization. Although, in general, the topic of intimacy in relationships is of no small importance.

Error 4

: fear of showing a woman your weakness. Men are raised to be strict from childhood, instilling in them strictly “masculine” qualities.

Growing up, a man is terrified of showing some simple human feelings and emotions. He does not allow him to admit any weakness, believing that this is unmanly. However, all people have emotions. It will be much more pleasant for a woman to see a living person nearby who is not afraid to show his feelings, who trusts her with his experiences.

Thus, at the beginning of a relationship, men and women often make mistakes. Wisdom lies in being able to recognize them in time, draw conclusions and change your behavior.

How to avoid mistakes?

“The simplest and most effective way is to talk. Communicate, ask each other questions. Discuss everything that worries and worries,” the psychologist advised.

Honesty and directness in relationships is the best path to mutual understanding and is best practiced from the very beginning of the relationship.

It is very important not to become isolated in your fears and doubts. At the initial stage of a relationship, they arise almost exclusively due to a lack of information. Therefore, you simply need to share with your partner what is on your soul. Find out, clarify. Practice shows that in most cases, any doubts can be dispelled simply by talking about this topic with your partner. Directly asking him what he thinks about this, what his intentions are for this, what his views are about this.

Otherwise, a person begins to beat himself up, may succumb to pressure and destroy the relationship. But there is another danger. The fact is that anxiety looks from the outside as alienation, indifference, coldness, lack of love.

In addition to heart-to-heart conversations, there is another factor that has a beneficial effect on relationships - sex. It can be useful even at the beginning of a relationship, you heard right.

The fact is that when we touch someone, kiss or have sex, our body reacts by releasing hormones that are associated with intimacy. These hormones are thought to promote love and bonding and increase the likelihood that people will stay together.

What conclusion can be drawn from all that has been read? A good and strong relationship is the fruit of the joint work of a man and a woman, but its further existence will depend on how everything works out at the very beginning. Remember, the main thing in a relationship is true and mutual love. And mistakes are not a hindrance if you know how to solve them correctly.

Ksenia Ushakova15:11, 06 February 2018

Back forward