Depression after the death of a loved one: how to get out

0 12205 January 18, 2020 at 04:54 pm Author of the publication: Tatyana Kuzmina, consultant on education abroad

That ill-fated day destroyed everything I had - my husband died. The feeling that a single organism was deprived of its head and told to move on. But how? Without eyes, without feelings, without meaning. Everything turned black. It was as if the thin protective shell around me was shattered with his departure. I wish I could go there to see him as soon as possible, if only his soul would be waiting for me there. Despair. Impotence. They say that depression after the death of a loved one goes away over time. But the days go by and all I can do is howl.

The loss of a loved one disorients us and leads us into a dead end of depression after his death. There was life. There was happiness. There was laughter and understanding, care and joy. It seems that these states can never exist again. Without him. How to get out of depression after the death of your beloved husband? Systemic vector psychology explains why it hurts so unbearably and shows how to cope with depression after the death of a loved one.

Stage: Experiences - Depression

It most often affects those people who prefer to keep everything to themselves and not open up to people.
Such experiences drain their psyche, and soon they run out of strength to move on. A person stops believing that someday he will be able to survive this grief. As a result, this can lead to alienation. When a person keeps everything to himself and suppresses all feelings, reducing communication with family and friends to a minimum, this threatens with serious problems. At first, a woman does not think about how to get out of depression after the death of her husband, because she has not yet realized what happened. All this seems to her like an absurd dream that will soon end. It is during this period that the widow experiences a severe psychological blow and is in a state of shock. Gradually, she begins to experience the first bouts of hysteria and uncontrollable sobbing.

Young wives may begin to hate everyone around them. The widow feels that other people are unfairly happy with their significant other. How to get out of depression after the death of your husband, if everyone around you is enjoying life, is not an easy question.

An acute and overly violent reaction is gradually replaced by apathy. Mental pain turns into dull and aching. At this stage, the widow denies what happened, not wanting to come to terms with it. She surrounds herself with gifts, personal belongings and photographs of her husband, listens to audio recordings of his voice and watches home videos. At the same time, the woman becomes fixated on grief. She does not pay attention to what has nothing to do with her husband.

If the symptoms of depression in women do not go away for too long, then this already leads to harm to the body. Today, statistics show many cases of widows dying one or two years after saying goodbye to their spouse.

How long does depression last in women?

Divorce often provokes apathy in the fair half. Ladies lose their perky interest and lack the desire to look their best, as a result of which they may stop taking care of themselves. Previously familiar and adored activities today no longer cause joy, but only generate irritation. There is only one desire: for everyone to lag behind and not interfere with the joy of indulging in despondency. Sleep disappears, appetite disappears, while in the morning there is an inability and reluctance to get out of bed.

Labor productivity often decreases because it is difficult for young ladies to concentrate on performing their job duties.

Manifestations of psychosomatic ailments occur: dizziness, malaise, colds. The described symptoms are due to the desire of the psyche to protect itself from additional stressors.

Typically, depression after divorce in women develops in stages and includes five successive stages. First comes the stage of denial, which consists of some attempt, through a reasonable attitude, to devalue the terminated connection, which is replaced by embitterment. Here the woman begins to burst out with anger towards her ex-husband, blaming him for the destruction of the relationship.

Then comes the stage, considered the most difficult period, of the desire to restore the former connection. Depression itself comes when the stages of denial, anger and the desire to restore the relationship do not provide relief, and also do not contribute to the achievement of results. The last stage of experiencing the breaking of Hymen’s “shackles” is the period of adaptation, when the awareness of the transformed life situation and acceptance of it begins.

At the same time, the severity of the manifestations, the degree of experience and the severity of the above stages are determined by many factors, the key of which are considered to be:

– the reason for the breakdown of the relationship;

– support from family and friends;

– material security, financial difficulties;

- presence of common offspring.

As a rule, depression after a divorce from a husband can be observed for several months, but sometimes it can last more than a year.

The duration is also determined by the reasons for separation, the financial component, and the presence of children.

The stages of depression after the death of a loved one

The first stage after the death of a loved one is denial of what happened. After this, the person realizes that he will never again be able to talk to the deceased, hug him, see him, or tell him about his feelings. Such thoughts prevent an adequate perception of reality and incoming information.

According to psychological research, depression caused by the death of a loved one is accompanied by various stages that alternately replace each other. Features include a lack of consistency and varying degrees of manifestation.

At first, the person refuses to believe what happened - even if everyone knew that this would happen (due to illness, old age). However, everyone, deep down in their souls, hopes that everything will work out, and after death they are not able to fully believe and understand that this happened. A person is so shocked by misfortune that he cannot accept this loss. The main reason for denial is fear of the future, of how to live on and cope with difficulties without a loved one.

Often, after an incident, a person loses the ability to adequately perceive the world around him and react to it. He ceases to realize who he is, where he lives, what happened. This short-term mental disorder is natural. A person in this condition needs help. You can't leave him alone.

This stage is very important, because thanks to it the psyche is protected, and the risk that a person will go crazy is reduced. After some time, this period gives way to awareness, and the second stage begins.

Even from such a difficult state there is a way out.

1. You should go through all the stages that were discussed earlier. You cannot isolate yourself and refuse the help of your family and loved ones. Accepting the death of a loved one requires significant effort and time, but no one is able to predict how long each of us will stay in this world. There is no need to close yourself off and isolate yourself from your loved ones - let your family help you. It is their support that will allow us to cope with this mental illness. There is no need to silently experience your grief - you should definitely cry and talk it out, after which relief will come.
2. When you can’t cope with depression on your own, you need to visit a doctor. He will show you how to deal with grief.
3. There is no need to be afraid that by starting life from scratch, you will betray the memory of the deceased. On the contrary, you will retain good memories of him, and he will remain in your soul forever. Continue to love and care for the loved ones around you.

How to get a man out of depression

The diagnosis has been made that the man is depressed. You may feel confused and even some fear, because you are also accustomed to thinking that behind a man is like behind a stone wall. And now your wall has cracked.

Think about whether you can help him cope and get out of protracted depression on your own. You may find these practical tips useful.

After the death of a loved one

An elderly man

It is more difficult to lift an elderly man out of despondency than a young man. This will require special attention and care, because depression can worsen chronic diseases and develop new ailments. Therefore, basic care should be as follows:

• moderate physical activity;
• balanced nutrition morning, afternoon and evening;
• good sleep;
• drinking freshly squeezed juice, herbal tea;
• walks in the open air;
• communication with loved ones, especially children and grandchildren.

On distance

If it turns out that you are far from the man you love, and he is completely depressed, give him the feeling that you are always there:

• write text messages;
• make phone calls;
• contact via Skype;
• send him beautiful photos by email;
• remind him of the imminent meeting and the souvenirs that you have already prepared for him.

The only advice is not to overdo it with communication, let it be regular, but unobtrusive, so as not to provoke his discontent and aggression.

You can also ask a mutual friend to take the depressed man under his wing, so that there is a real person nearby who wishes him well and is involved in his recovery.

After divorce

Divorce is an unpleasant matter, leaving a heavy aftertaste on the soul, possibly for the rest of your life. After all, whatever one may say, once upon a time both a woman and a man decided to live together, and divorce is evidence of the failure of both: they were unable to build and maintain a relationship. It is especially difficult for a man to get out of depression if his wife initiated the divorce.

Children and close friends can provide effective help. You can change the situation, take a person on vacation, to a place where he has long dreamed of visiting. It’s great if a divorced man takes up what he loves, a hobby: photography, painting, books, something that brings him true pleasure when time passes unnoticed.

And, perhaps, the most important thing is to try to establish calm communication with your ex-wife, forgive each other and wish a new happy life, communicate on the phone, and meet with mutual friends from time to time. Accept and realize the very fact of divorce and try to live a full life.

After the death of his wife

One of the most common reasons that leads all men, without exception, to depression is the death of their wife. It is imperative to ensure lively, warm communication between the widower and children and mutual acquaintances. Remember your wife, grieve together, remember funny incidents from your life together.

It is also useful to change the situation, to leave for a while from the house where you lived together for years. You can start renovations and change the interior.

In the most severe cases, you can seek help from a psychologist.

A man suffering from depression, first of all, needs the sincere care of loved ones. Communication should be calm, unobtrusive and on a pleasant topic. The ideal interlocutor is a wife, best friend, perhaps also going through difficult times and depression. Small children are very good at defusing the situation.

1. Watch films together
   about men who survived depression and returned to normal life again. If you want to read books, let the sick person read books on similar topics.
2. Don’t sit in one place
   , under any pretext, walk or go out into nature, preferably away from the city - to a park, a grove, or fishing. In general, more physical activity. Plus good conversationalists.
3. Do not give in to provocations
   if a man is having an attack of aggression. Try not to respond to attacks, do not criticize, remain as calm as possible and be understanding. Make a joke, hug, put him to bed.
4. Provide your man with a healthy diet
   and good sleep. Try to eliminate alcohol. It is acceptable in minimal quantities: dinner, candles, a glass of wine.
5. In severe cases
   , contact a specialist; you may need to prescribe medications.

Be healthy, and let depression bypass you and your beloved men!

They die more often than women after the death of their spouses. This conclusion was reached by the staff of the Rochester Institute of Technology. As it turned out, among them the corresponding risk was increased by 30 percent. I would like to see some romance in this sad fact, but the reason for such a mortality rate among widowed men is most often not in love affection, but in severe stress and the lack of habit of managing everyday life.

Men killed mammoths, obtained food, made fires and defended their homes. Men continue to earn money, protect and light the stoves. But they refuse to bear the burden of home and social life alone. A wife can nag, gnaw, bother, she can be the cause of all the misfortunes in plaintive conversations with friends. But for a man, his wife is physically and emotionally closer than anyone else around him. The loss of such a universal person is a severe blow to a man’s health.

— Men are more specific, tougher, so breaking their usual way of life is much more catastrophic for them. If people have lived a long time, usually the wife is a source of emotions and vital energy for the husband. And a man, left alone, finds it much more difficult to find an emotional replacement. The situation is also aggravated by the strong attitude of men that they cannot show their weaknesses. They cannot admit that they feel bad without a wife, that they are accustomed to a bunch of household chores that make up the joys of everyday life. Due to their unwillingness to admit their weakness, they often break down

,” comments Eva Veselnitskaya, full member of MAISU (ICCIA), teacher, writer, psychologist.

In this section: Partner news

Professor Javier Espinoza, who conducted a study at the Rochester Institute, analyzed married people born in the 1910-1930s. “Men are often unprepared for the death of their wife. Therefore, her loss greatly affects their health, because wives, as a rule, monitor the physical and emotional state of their spouse.”

, he explained the results. Whatever one may say, if you want to live, take care of the woman.

According to Eva Veselnitskaya, women are able to come to terms with the loss of a spouse, thanks to their psychological flexibility and high level of adaptation to difficult life situations. Due to the dominant reliance on emotions and feelings, women adapt more easily. However, when women lose their children, they break down more often. They experience the death of a child more than the loss of a man.

After studying information on 69 thousand mothers aged 20 to 50 years, scientists found that if a child dies, the risk of death of the mother increases by 133 percent, and this risk is especially high in the first two years after the death of the child. Causes of death, sex of the child, marital status, income, and mother's education had no influence on this relationship.

While some scientists were figuring out how and why men and women react to the loss of loved ones, other scientists wondered what happens in the human body and why grief can literally kill. It turned out that during stress, the human body produces a large amount of adrenaline, the release of which leads to a narrowing of the arteries. And impaired blood circulation can lead directly to the formation of blood clots and a heart attack. Thus, the loss of a loved one increases the risk of a heart attack by 21 times. Such data was previously reported by the BBC.

Among patients, 13.6 percent had lost a significant other in the six months before their heart attack. The risk of an attack increased sharply on the first day after the psychological shock. Only after seven days did it begin to gradually subside.

Everyone has their own individual reserve of strength, the ability to survive, grow stale and not fade away. There are those who become stronger when broken: they discover that, being broken, like the branches of a tree, they can continue to live in the other direction. So, having lost his beloved wife Cassandra Harris, Pierce Brosnan got out of depression thanks to his role in the next James Bond film. It was the actor’s wife who contributed to Brosnan’s creative development. Perhaps his decision to continue living and acting in films is a tribute to memory, a sign of respect and gratitude to Cassandra.

The work also helped actor Keanu Reeves cope with the loss. In 1999, he was preparing for his wedding to Jennifer Syme and the birth of their child. A week before giving birth, Jennifer suffered a miscarriage. Alcohol and drugs—and it was with their help that Jennifer tried to cope with the loss—only accelerated the departure of the actor’s fiancee. She died in a car accident.

Finally, Yoko Ono: John Lennon's wife chose life. Their intense passion and love is still talked about, but more than 30 years have passed since Lennon’s death, and Yoko lives alone and still honors the memory of her husband. Rethinking life, reassessing values, learning to be different and move on.

It is incredible courage and fortitude to find the ability to live after the most terrible losses.

The time of death is unpredictable—always. Death is a natural process. But when people die, it’s scary! Is it possible to prepare for death? Regardless of whether it occurred as a result of a long illness or a banal accident. We cannot change the past and future, only the present remains. How to survive and survive death

loved ones in this terrible present, especially if your beloved spouse or wife has died?

Symptoms and signs

After the death of a loved one, the following symptoms of depression in women are observed:

1. Insomnia. A person cannot independently find a way out of a situation and make the right decision. The widow's thoughts are fragmentary, without a clear structure. This happens partly due to sleep disturbances.
2. Restricting access to your world to other people. Women often cut off contact with all relatives and acquaintances in order to protect themselves from annoying questions.
3. Guilt. The understanding that nothing can be returned creates a feeling of helplessness. At the same time, the widow hates herself and gradually begins to think about suicide.
4. Loss of appetite. As a rule, a person completely refuses food or takes it through force. Although sometimes there are opposite situations when women eat away their grief with sweets, which results in excess weight and new disorders.
5. Negative thoughts. Due to a depressed mood, there is no way to believe in a bright future and wait for everything to finally be fine. In this situation, people lose their optimistic attitude and expect only more troubles from fate. Often widows wonder how to live after the death of their husband, and, not knowing the answer, decide to follow their lover.

How do men cope with divorce?

Modern society today perceives the breakdown of marriage as almost the norm. At the same time, any factors can become reasons for breaking the “chains” of Hymen, from minor domestic discord to domestic tyranny or betrayal.

Depression after divorce manifests itself as a persistent decrease in mood, inability to concentrate, and slowness of speech. A man simply doesn’t want to do anything; nothing can give him pleasure.

People are accustomed to believing and instilling in their offspring from childhood that men are not subject to emotions, they are strong and persistent. In fact, men can sometimes experience the breakdown of a family more strongly than their counterparts.

Depression after divorce in men occurs due to loss of stability, wounded pride, change in social role, longing for the past, children, which leads to a change in the divorced person’s behavioral pattern, his character, and habits. Some men, after being freed from the bonds of Hymen, immerse themselves entirely in work, others plunge into a “whirlpool of passions,” and still others fall into “alcohol networks.”

After the divorce, men are prone to self-destruction; they cease to value their own existence and often commit ridiculous, dangerous acts. Another unpleasant, but often encountered scenario is the inability of a man to completely let go of his ex-wife. He can secretly spy on his ex, study her online life, and interfere in her real life. In the worst situations, such men can threaten their spouse with suicide if they do not return everything back.

The picture can become more complicated if there are joint offspring who are having a hard time experiencing a parental divorce. In addition, children often become hostages of the scenario played out by their parents, the subject of speculation and blackmail, which has a detrimental effect on the mental health of children. If a man was the initiator of the breakup, then the burden of guilt regarding the children begins to weigh on him.

Depression after a divorce from his wife can overtake the male half for various reasons, the key ones are given below:

– disruption of the usual way of life;

– feeling of uselessness;

– fear of losing their offspring (often women play an ugly game, using their own children as a weapon and a means of punishing ex-spouses, preventing them from meeting, pitting children against their fathers);

– if the spouse was the initiator of the breakup, then this can significantly lower a man’s self-esteem;

– if the initiator was the spouse, then an oppressive feeling of guilt arises before the offspring;

– disappointment in the inspired desire for a “free life”, the understanding that freedom did not live up to expectations, and the new companion is no better than the previous one.

Depression after divorce can be expressed in men by the following manifestations:

– violation of mental operations (decision-making skills, concentration, and ability to remember suffer);

– abuse of alcoholic beverages or other psychoactive drugs;

– attacks of anger and aggressiveness, directed not only at one’s own person, but also externally;

– loss of interest in the professional environment, hobbies, career achievements, material well-being;

– persistent feelings of guilt, pangs of conscience or a feeling of inadequacy;

– nutritional disorders;

– decreased potency;

– chronic fatigue, loss of ability to work;

- suicidal thoughts.

Creation

An excellent way to relax and distract from bad thoughts is creativity. When depression sets in, you don’t have the strength to do anything, you just want to lie down and look at the ceiling, you need to remember your childhood or youth hobbies. It's never too late to pick up a camera or a brush again and do what you once loved.

During periods of depression, the advice of a psychologist plays an important role, because many people completely trust a specialist. A true professional can advise you to find something you like and don’t give it up. Over time, you will be able to achieve new successes, thanks to which negative thoughts and a depressive mood will fade into the background.

Charity

Another good answer to the question of how to live after the death of your husband is charity. Psychologists say that grief is perfectly cured by the misfortune of others. A person who finds himself in a difficult situation must necessarily encounter other people who also have problems that are large-scale for them.

If a woman nevertheless decides to get rid of her problem in this way, then she is recommended to visit various hospitals where there are incurable patients. When she sees with her own eyes the courage with which those around her endure their troubles, the widow will be able to feel ashamed of her own weakness, and then set herself the motivation to overcome the problems.

Humility

Humility is considered one of the most important stages of rehabilitation. It is from the moment of his arrival that the healing process begins. It allows you to accept the inevitable and still understand that death will eventually come to all people on the planet.

For some widows, religion helps them come to terms. It is she who teaches that inconsolability, grief and tears are not what the deceased would like to see. Letting him go does not mean stopping loving him, because you can keep the memory in your heart forever.

Going to church, regular conversations with clergy, as well as religious rituals of commemorating the deceased will have a calming effect on any woman.

The most terrible test in life is death and the pain of loss.

This stage proceeds differently for everyone. People want to change jobs, change place of residence, make new acquaintances, but for some, the desire to start life from scratch arises after a year, while for others, after a few months.

As practice shows, it is impossible to fully prepare for the death of a loved one, even if he was sick, and such an outcome has already been determined by doctors. Such a loss usually results in serious emotional distress and depression. After this, the grieving person himself may, as it were, “fall out of life” for a long period of time.

Unfortunately, there is no quick way to get out of the depressed state provoked by the death of a loved one, but it is necessary to take measures to ensure that this misfortune does not result in a severe form of depression for you. As a rule, after the death of a close relative or friend, people begin to feel guilty, feeling that they did not do all the good for the deceased that he deserved. Many thoughts related to the deceased person scroll through the head, which causes general depression.

Behavior after divorce

Those men who cannot cope with depression on their own sometimes resort to extreme measures, which only aggravate the situation and disrupt their emotional state.

Craving for alcohol

The most common cases are when a man in despair finds solace through the malicious use of alcoholic beverages. Drinking alcohol only brings relief at first, but then complete apathy towards everything sets in and the man drives himself into a “dead end” with his own hands. Alcohol addiction, in addition to depression, can bring a number of other troubles - problems at work, abandonment of relatives and friends, and then complete degradation. As a rule, drunk people make a lot of other mistakes, which sometimes end sadly, sometimes a man is even deprived of parental rights, as a result of which he is not able to see his children. Therefore, before you grab the bottle again, think, is this what you want?

Increased interest in the female sex

Another type of man, on the contrary, rushes into the arms of different women in order to quickly forget about the wife who broke off relations with him. But as practice shows, such attempts have never brought real happiness, neither to men nor to women. Until you free your head from bad thoughts, let go of the situation and can return to normal life, you will not be able to build a new happy family, since everything will irritate you, and why should another person suffer from this?

Shut in on yourself

This is also an equally rare case of the consequences of breaking up a long-term relationship. By withdrawing into yourself, you delve deeper into the problem, but do not solve it, because of this, even more anger and unwillingness to put up with the situation accumulates. And if you discuss what worries you with your loved ones or friends, this will help relieve your tense state a little. In addition, in return they will provide you with reliable support, suggest how you can spend time together, and will take up your free time to the maximum so that you think less about the bad. If you are not the type of man who complains about his problems to loved ones, then maybe you should still take the help of a specialist. He will offer you many options on how to get out of a prolonged depression without anyone else knowing about it.

Emotions

During depression, you should not hide your feelings and suppress them. The natural release of all bad emotions will significantly alleviate the widow’s condition. After attacks of despair, tears and strong reproaches, it becomes much easier.

If you try to push anger, resentment and irritation inside, they will only intensify. Internal dissatisfaction will gradually increase, simultaneously destroying the personality and condition of the woman’s body.

In any case, you need to pull yourself together and survive the stage of suffering. It is an important part of the path to full recovery. But a drama that has not been suffered through can easily become a big obstacle on the road to moral and physical healing.

It’s very good when there is a person to whom you can talk without hesitation. It’s not that difficult to pour out your pain to an understanding person who has already experienced a similar misfortune.

Psychology and symptoms of male blues

Men don’t like to complain; their favorite pastime is to brag: about their achievements, women, cars. You can't boast about depression. Therefore, to hear from a man’s lips “You know, I’m depressed” is an incident in the realm of the incredible.

They are even afraid to admit it to themselves, although the symptoms are visible to the naked eye:

• loss of physical strength, increased fatigue;
• poor appetite;
• Bad mood;
• feeling of loss of meaning in life;
• craving for alcohol and drugs;
• increased aggressiveness;
• insomnia or restless sleep.

If some of these symptoms are observed in your man, give him a helping hand, try to get him out of the emotional quagmire.

How to cure depression

Sometimes depression does not go away, and a person becomes more and more immersed in his grief and experiences, suffering from melancholy, pain and memories. In this condition, urgent assistance from a specialist is required.

There are a number of symptoms to define complicated depression. If they are present, qualified medical assistance is required.

1. Melancholy and a depressed state accompany the patient for many months.
2. A person suffers from obsessive thoughts, hallucinations, and images of the deceased.
3. Refusal to accept real life as it is.
4. Addiction to alcoholic beverages, excessive use of psychotropic drugs.
5. Diligent avoidance of everything connected and related to the deceased.
6. The meaning of life is lost, a person lives in a state of emptiness and uncertainty.
7. Constant feeling of guilt.
8. Suicidal tendencies and attempts to commit suicide.
9. The person becomes inhibited and is no longer able to do usual activities.
10. The patient is firmly convinced that the deceased is actually alive.

Stages of Grief

Psychologists identify seven stages that allow you to come to terms with and understand what happened.

1. The first stage is called denial. The individual does not believe what happened and does not understand how to continue to live. He may begin to behave inappropriately. It is important that there are people nearby who could bring the grieving person out of his state, distract him, and make him think about others who are also experiencing the death of a loved one. There is no need to try to console him, he is now unable to accept your help. At this stage, the person is able to hear the voice of the deceased person, see him in the crowd, but this is all a reaction to what happened, and not a deviation in the psyche.
2. The second stage is the manifestation of anger. The person believes that what happened was unfair, does not understand why it happened to him, to his family, begins to show his anger towards people who are alive and well, calmly walking down the street, sitting on a bench, communicating, does not understand, why are they alive when his relative is no longer there?
3. Stage three, feeling of guilt. A person begins to blame himself for not being attentive enough, behaving incorrectly, or spending little time. For some, this feeling persists throughout their lives.
4. The fourth stage, a state of depression. The individual no longer has the strength to hide his condition, his emotions. One feels completely exhausted and the person becomes unhappy.
5. Fifth stage, acceptance. The person finally realizes what exactly happened, the pain becomes less, and the depression slowly goes away. The realization comes that you can now let go of the situation and move on with your life.
6. Sixth stage, period of revival. After the death of a loved one, an understanding comes that one needs to live on, accept new conditions, but at the same time the individual withdraws into himself and communicates little with other people. One gets the impression that he is constantly analyzing something. This period can even last up to two years or more.
7. The seventh stage describes the beginning of a new life. This is a period when the stages of grief are experienced, life is at a new level. Some individuals at this stage are trying to find new friends, change the environment, someone changes their place of residence, work, does everything to ensure that nothing reminds them of the past. For example, the realization may come that the death of her mother was a deliverance for her if the woman had been ill and suffered for a long time before this.

The problem is that not all people are able to go through the seven stages; sometimes they get stuck at the fourth stage, locked in their tragedy. In this situation, you need to contact a psychotherapist. A specialist will help you cope with the current situation and teach you how to overcome depression. A psychotherapist will help you overcome all stages of grief, maintain a healthy psyche, and prevent complications from developing.

Letter to my husband

When her husband suddenly leaves, a woman develops a feeling of unsaidness. The widow is tormented by her conscience and the thought that something remains unclear between the lovers. A woman experiences the death of her husband especially hard if there was a quarrel the day before.

Psychologists advise writing a letter to your husband. It needs to state everything that remains unsaid. Thoughts that have accumulated after the funeral should appear on paper.

In this letter, you must thank your husband for everything he has done. You should also tell him about your own feelings. If you wish, you can ask for forgiveness for all the insults caused during your life together.

Family support

When you have managed to survive all the terrible moments, it is time to return to your family. At this stage, you need to plunge into the lives of your children, helping them in everything. Thanks to this, the widow will understand her purpose in life.

Children need support just like their mother, because they too have lost a loved one. Mutual assistance will allow the family to unite and survive the irreparable together. Over time, worries about younger family members to whom you want to devote your life will distract you from sorrowful thoughts.

Antidepressants

Many people who do not know a way out of the situation turn to artificial help from medications. Antidepressants are quite strong drugs that can only be used under the supervision of a specialist. Many of them, of course, can be purchased at a pharmacy without a prescription from a psychotherapist, but still you should not use them without consultation.

Below are the best drugs for depression that are guaranteed to get rid of the problem. But to achieve a good result, you should coordinate their use with your doctor.

"Fevarin"

This drug is a unique antidepressant of the new generation SSRI group. Its cost is 900 rubles, and can be purchased at any pharmacy without a doctor’s prescription.

This remedy is a good help for depression. Many psychotherapists even consider it the best among cheap and expensive analogues. It is impossible to say exactly how long depression lasts, since each person experiences this period differently, but with the help of such a drug, the symptoms will go away quite quickly.

Despite all the positive aspects of an antidepressant, there is one caveat - it must be taken with the utmost caution. It is incompatible with many other medications, which the doctor will tell you about during your consultation. In addition, it should be remembered that this antidepressant is quite strong, so you should not use it during a depressed mood due to some trifle.

"Amitriptyline"

An excellent antidepressant can be purchased for just 100 rubles at the nearest pharmacy without a prescription. These pills help relieve depression and neurotic symptoms.

The drug is an excellent answer to the question of how to survive depression after the death of your husband. He is respected by psychotherapists and most of their patients. After taking the pills, side effects may appear, but they will pass quickly enough. It could be:

• dry mouth;
• constipation;
• dizziness;
• convulsions;
• tachycardia.

The course of taking the pills must be prescribed by the attending physician. If you follow all the recommendations of a specialist, then the question of how to get out of depression after the death of your husband will automatically disappear. An antidepressant in just a few weeks can lift a person out of the deepest depression and return him to normal life.