The infidelity of one of the partners always hurts the heart of the other and causes a variety of thoughts - from attacks of despair and the desire to immediately break off the relationship to inventing ways of revenge. For many men, cheating is considered an extreme form of betrayal, and a woman after it is considered dirty and unworthy of love and attention. And a situation where you can just go your separate ways and forget about everything will not always suit a young man. In most cases, he will not calm down until he figures out how to take revenge on his girlfriend or wife for cheating, even if she already becomes an ex.
Rational decision
When a young man finds out about his wife's infidelity, he may experience a state of emotional shock, accompanied by a strong desire to be punished for infidelity. Often this can lead to irreversible consequences. Therefore, to begin with, it is very important to calm down and analyze the problem that has arisen. It often happens that when making a decision, a man blames his girlfriend for everything and does not think about the true reasons for such an act and his role in it. In fact, it is useful to analyze the circumstances that could have prompted the lady to engage in such indecent behavior. This will help you understand the situation, distribute thoughts in your head and make a reasonable decision.
The reasons for female infidelity may be as follows:
- If you have an early marriage (for example, due to an unexpected pregnancy), then perhaps your spouse was not mentally prepared for it. After all, this is a deprivation of a certain freedom, constraint by family obligations, etc. In other words, she did not have time to work up and is now trying to make up for lost time.
- Perhaps your partner is more temperamental than you and may simply be unsatisfied in the intimate sphere, so she is looking for “supplements” on the side. Especially if lately you have begun to refuse her for some reason. For example, due to being very busy or tired.
- The satellite behaves repulsively. For example, flirting with other ladies, potential infidelity, frequent use of alcohol (and possibly drugs), use of physical force towards a partner, stinginess and hiding money, etc.
It is important to calmly consider the possible reasons for the betrayal of your significant other and understand what your role is in this. On this basis, a decision is already made on what to do next with your relationship. But here you need to take into account some points:
- everything must be within the law,
- violence with the use of physical force is excluded,
- It is prohibited to involve third parties in your disputes, especially children.
How to punish your ex-wife after divorce
Having officially broken the marriage bond, a man may also want retribution; the following methods will come to the rescue:
- Find a gorgeous girlfriend. Getting into a serious love relationship immediately after a divorce is not the best way to arrange your personal life. The desire to prick your ex-other half, the desire to quickly start a new family, demonstrating that you are in demand, seething resentments are an obstacle to the search for a candidate wife, but no one has canceled girlfriends, dates, and novels. It will be unpleasant for a wife, even if she is in a relationship with another man, to see a beauty next to her ex-husband.
- Share the situation with your friends. It is worthwhile, without unnecessary suffering, to notify godfathers and family friends about the treacherous act of the cheater, the outrageous deceit committed behind her husband’s back.
- Rise higher. A great way to take revenge is to achieve personal success and become prettier. The plan is wonderful because anger aimed at self-improvement will benefit the guy himself.
- Join a gym , lose excess weight, give up cigarettes, start watching your diet, change your image, start traveling, meet new people, think about career growth, or start your own business.
A surefire way to make an unfaithful woman bite her elbows is to become better than she was during the marriage. Divorce puts an end to family life. Many spouses tend to underestimate their partner, consider him physically imperfect, boring, and a loser.
Seeing her ex-husband getting out of a new, more prestigious car, looking younger, fit, impressive, a woman experiences unpleasant emotions, because he is obliged to suffer, lose sleep, lose appetite, roll over, drink himself to death, and not enjoy life, change for the better.
Define the goal
Every relationship has its own individuality, and, accordingly, there cannot be a general solution for all couples. But it is important for a man to set his own ultimate goal, to decide how to live further and in what case he should take revenge on his wife for betrayal.
As a rule, there can be two goals:
- Break off the relationship and never return to it. When you understand for sure that this act cannot be forgotten and forgiven, sometimes the best punishment is cold-blooded indifference and help in collecting personal belongings. The girl may ask for forgiveness, fall to her knees, swear that this will not happen again, or even beg to hit her. Because it is indifference that hurts the most. After all, the companion expects emotions, anger, declarations of love or hatred, but not a disregardful attitude. And for you, in turn, in order to maintain your own dignity, it is better to vent your emotions in the gym or boxing gym and go away for a while to work, a hobby or vacation.
- Try to maintain the union if there is love or children together. If you have chosen this goal, then most likely your feelings will prevail over your resentment. And you understand that you are not an exclusively ideal partner either. Therefore, it is important to save the family and try to forgive your beloved. After all, you still have to live with her. Most women appreciate such an act and try after this to do everything to please their spouse and create family comfort.
Remember that the feeling of revenge is, first of all, resentment for oneself and focusing on it. As a rule, this condition is accompanied by low self-esteem, depressive thoughts, and the inability to do something and solve problems adequately. Therefore, it is important to find strength within yourself and abandon gloomy thoughts and terrible plans. Instead, show your companion that you are a self-sufficient person who can do without her help in any matter, and reduce communication with her to a minimum. Then she will probably regret what happened and sincerely repent.
Advice from psychologists
Experts recommend taking the news of betrayal with dignity. The best way is to help your wife pack her things with an understanding face. For a girl who is accustomed to having to fight for her, such behavior will be a shock. She has suffered a severe blow to her pride, she will begin to doubt her actions and may want to stay.
Also, psychologists do not recommend damaging your wife’s property. It is better to avoid such methods of solving the problem, since such behavior can lead to problems with the law.
The most important question is whether to forgive betrayal. The answer to this must be individual. People are different, so not everyone is able to forgive betrayal. For example, guys with high self-esteem usually get divorced. They understand that they do not want to continue living with a traitor.
READ How to force your husband to admit cheating on his own: advice from a psychologist
A man should not pester his ex-lover's friends. Such methods aimed at hurting the offender look pathetic and repulsive.
A person must be able to forgive. This is difficult to do, but this is the only way to truly teach a cheater a lesson. Men are proud creatures, so they must face difficulties along the way with dignity.
Methods of punishment
If you understand that you will not be able to live and sleep peacefully if your friend goes unpunished, then we will consider the most acceptable methods for this:
- Physical. In a fit of anger, representatives of the stronger sex most often use physical force. But in this case, it is important to remember that you are dealing with a woman who is much weaker. And in principle, such an act does not look good on any man. Therefore, if you couldn’t control yourself and your hand rose on its own, then the maximum that could happen was a light slap in the face. She, as in films with the participation of Celentano, will help to “sober up” the partner and hurt her pride.
- Psychological. Young ladies are emotional creatures, so moral influence will be more effective in terms of punishment. For example, you can start a “cold war” and simply ignore your lady love: both in communication and in sex. An indifferent attitude and detachment will make your spouse feel guilty and useless. It is important to pause long enough before accepting her attempts to earn forgiveness and renew contact. This way the error will be fully recognized. But keep in mind that you shouldn’t delay it too much. After all, in despair, the chosen one can simply go to her lover.
- Material. You can punish your passion by reducing its funding or even completely depriving it of funds (of course, not those that it earns on its own). At the same time, demonstratively make a major purchase for yourself, for example, buy a gold watch or a car.
- Jealousy. Improve your appearance, periodically flirt with other ladies and be away from home more often. If your companion has feelings for you, it will stab you painfully into the heart, causing bouts of jealousy and an understanding of what it’s like to be betrayed by a loved one. But you shouldn’t repeat your wife’s negative action yourself, so as not to stoop to her level and not offend other, innocent women by refusing further relationships.
If you cannot calm down from the insult and are wondering how to punish your ex-wife for cheating, you can consider the following methods as an alternative:
- Demonstrate your success in business, work, sports, so that she understands what kind of man she lost and regrets her action.
- Find yourself a worthy soul mate and, if possible, brag about it. Show how beautiful, feminine, caring, faithful she is and what incredible happiness you found when you met her. Then the ex will definitely bite her lips out of anger, resentment and disappointment.
- Surprise your ex-wife completely by thanking her for remaining in your past, thanks to which you have a new life and a more worthy chosen one.
Whatever method of revenge you choose, it is important not to lose your dignity and not cause too serious harm to the girl. After all, it is unknown how life will turn out in the future and what consequences may arise. It is enough that the young lady realizes her negative action and sincerely regrets it.
How to cope with the news of betrayal with dignity
The critical moment when a man can commit a rash act is the moment when it becomes known about his wife’s love affairs. The most important thing at this moment is not to hit your wife or her lover, or, even worse, not to kill. The situation is anecdotal, but in real life it is not at all funny, and maintaining composure is not so easy. It is best to remain calm, appear indifferent, and demonstrate to your wife that you do not care at all about her cheating. If she decides to leave for her lover, you can help her pack her things. This behavior will confuse your wife; she expects from you a surge of emotions, anger, rage, but not a caring attitude. This will make her question whether she is doing the right thing.
I punished my wife for cheating, what should I do?
Having committed an act of retaliation, you should not tell anyone about it, not even close friends or relatives. Such information can harm a person’s reputation, showing him to be vindictive, insidious, petty, and if disclosed to third parties, cause additional conflicts with the ex-wife, her relatives, or a new man.
Let the satisfied hunger for justice become the starting point for a new, happier life.
You should not take revenge on your ex-wife with the help of your children, “punishing” her with non-payment of alimony, denigrating the woman in the eyes of the offspring, calling their mother offensive words. Such behavior does not harm the cheater, but the child.
When he grows up, he will figure out who is right and who is wrong. There is no need to turn his childhood into a war zone between two people close to the child who were unable to find a common language.
Hit the weak spot2
Women increasingly want to teach a painful lesson to their ex-boyfriends or husbands. They strive to exploit all their weak points. Some women destroy their partners' favorite objects - a computer, a car.
Some consider the worst possible option for a traitor to be a relationship with his best friend or brother. Women will do everything to try to finish off the traitor. Someone arranges everything so that the ex sees ambiguous photos of the girl he just broke up with with his brother on social networks.
Some people believe that nothing works as well as rumors. When someone asks them why they broke up with their boyfriend, they answer in despair that he wasn't very good in bed, that he couldn't do much, that he was impotent.
