What is irresponsibility
This is a person’s lack of internal obligations. Irresponsible people are not prepared for life. They do not help their loved ones (social irresponsibility) and do not complete their work. This inner freedom allows them to avoid feelings of guilt for mistakes. But even if an irresponsible person does not make an effort to improve on his own, others will constantly remind him of this.
- parents;
- teachers at school;
- loved one;
- employer;
- Friends.
What allows us to draw conclusions about irresponsibility? There are 7 parameters:
- Constantly breaking promises.
- Deliberately false promises, “just to get rid of it.”
- Lack of punctuality.
- Poor quality work.
- Lack of desire for growth and development.
- Neglect of responsibilities.
- Reluctance to fulfill family responsibilities.
There are many examples of irresponsibility, because this is a common phenomenon. Everyone has encountered such an irresponsible person, because the trait is not at all uncommon. Many have noticed such qualities in themselves or have repeatedly heard similar remarks from others.
ABC of faith
Irresponsibility - 1) lack or absence of a responsible attitude towards one’s thoughts, desires, words, actions, behavior, life in general; 2) unwillingness to be responsible for one’s thoughts, desires, words, actions and activities in general; refusal to take responsibility for their consequences; 3) a form of behavior characterized by a clear disregard for the requirements of certain (in a particular society) laws, morality and ethics.
It is not common for an irresponsible person to correct on his own initiative the bad consequences caused by his words and actions.
Sometimes irresponsible acts are committed even by those persons who are entrusted with special responsibility for people, say, a shepherd, a doctor or a teacher (for example, when he excessively praises or scolds students), a parent (for example, overly protective of his children when they grow up in an atmosphere of impunity , indulgence).
Irresponsible people often do not recognize themselves as such. There can be many reasons behind irresponsibility. For example, it can be caused by frivolity, selfishness, naivety, etc. Irresponsibility can also be regarded as a form of immorality.
To better understand what irresponsibility is, let's go back to the very beginning of Scripture. It is indicated in the story of the Fall of our ancestors. As you know, the crime they committed led to the greatest catastrophe in the history of mankind.
Another example from the Bible: the irresponsibility of the leaders of Israel, which entailed an increase in social injustice, corruption, which contributed to the deviation of the masses into apostasy and the spread of idolatry. In the end, the irresponsibility of the Israeli leadership led to the collapse of the Jewish state and the Babylonian captivity.
Anyone who begins a difficult task without first paying due attention to it also acts irresponsibly. Belonging to the Church requires great responsibility from a person. Before a person becomes a member of the Church, he must understand why he seeks to do this, and having become a member of the Church, he must live like a Christian. “Do not play with your salvation,” St. Ignatius Brianchaninov said many times in letters to his spiritual children. Alas, often we do not have such seriousness, but we behave like some immature schoolchildren - stupid and careless. By doing this, Christians voluntarily make themselves open to the arrows of the evil one, and often he inflicts serious wounds on a person’s soul, which can then be very difficult to heal, and sometimes even impossible. Thus, the irresponsibility of a Christian can have a detrimental effect not only in his earthly life, but also in eternity.
Priest John Pavlov gives this example of spiritual irresponsibility. The man turned to faith, began to lead church life, and struggled with sin. But then old acquaintances call him and invite him to some kind of feast. A person goes there, gets drunk and gets into a fight while drunk, commits hooliganism and ends up with the police. Now he faces trial for fighting and hooliganism. “Temptation, the demon has misled me,” he says embarrassedly in confession. But this whole situation could have been foreseen in advance: in that company, strictly speaking, it could not have been otherwise. After all, when you went there, you knew perfectly well how the feasts of your old friends were going, you knew that the alcohol would flow like a river, that everyone would get drunk to the point of extreme intoxication and then they would do whatever they wanted. Why, knowing this, did you go there? Yes, of course, the demon has confused me - the demon always helps in bad things and pushes me to sin, but we also have our own heads? It was not just given by God, but so that we think at least a little. If it was known in advance that I would get drunk in this company, then, of course, there was no need to go there. Drunkenness in itself is a great sin, but the worst thing is that drunkenness is usually followed by many other sins, because it is known: when drunk, a person is capable of doing such things that you will not be able to unravel for a long time. It should be said that, of course, it would be best to completely abandon the drunken feast. If for some reason this did not work out and you still had to go there, then you had to strictly control yourself and, after sitting for a short time, leave - then you would be able to avoid all these troubles and sins.
It is noteworthy that not only laity, but also clergy can act irresponsibly. The irresponsibility of pastors can be revealed both in the fact that they do not pay due attention to the flock, and in the fact that, although they do, they do so in a completely different way than the Church requires. For example, if irresponsible obedience has developed in the parish, then the confessor, encouraged by his children, often begins to strictly regulate all aspects of the life of his flock, down to the smallest detail. Rarely will a shepherd withstand the burden of such unlimited power and unnatural responsibility without harm to his soul. It happens that, succumbing to the temptation of power, even once good priests break down and turn into false elders.
One of the most striking manifestations of irresponsibility in the modern world is a person’s irresponsible attitude towards his own family, towards his family responsibilities. Such an attitude can contribute to the emergence and development of intra-family conflicts, poor upbringing of children, and family breakdown.
Disadvantages and positive aspects of irresponsibility
There is such a psychotype: people who are excellent students. They are overly responsible. They don’t want a promotion, they crave it, they are ready to do anything for the sake of a goal. Nervous breakdowns and feelings of dissatisfaction are constant companions of such people. This is perhaps the only advantage of irresponsibility: the absence of internal tension and anxiety.
The problem of irresponsibility is the inability to cope with obligations due to the lack of an internal sense of duty. So, people easily lose their jobs for the sake of a fleeting whim to play hooky. They make false promises to get rid of them and don’t keep them. Irresponsible husbands do not strive to provide for their family; they put everything on their wife’s shoulders: both housekeeping and work. Irresponsible wives ignore the mountains of dirty dishes and the lack of food in the refrigerator. The spouse, coming home from work, must shoulder this responsibility. Along with irresponsibility are selfishness, unpunctuality, and deceit. Lies are the tool of an irresponsible person.
Children and adults: particular examples of irresponsibility
Irresponsible people “ruin” life not only for themselves. Their laziness and passivity negatively affect the existence of loved ones.
An irresponsible child does not want to do anything, which leads to poor performance in school. He cannot do basic things: pack a briefcase, write down homework correctly, convey important information to his parents, and cannot stand up for himself. Unhealthy behavior patterns carry over into adulthood. If measures are not taken in time, it will be extremely difficult to combat laziness in a child.
| Question for a psychologist. My son is 8 years old, but he is growing up as an absolutely irresponsible child. And it seems that this problem does not bother him at all. Is it still possible to improve the situation? Question for a psychologist. My son is 8 years old, but he is growing up as an absolutely irresponsible child. And it seems that this problem does not bother him at all. Is it still possible to improve the situation? |
| Irresponsible behavior is a learned form of behavior, a person learns it in the process of life. And if he was able to learn this form, then he can accordingly learn responsible behavior. It's never too late to learn, you can help your child make this learning more interesting - for example, in the form of a game. Encourage him when he shows responsibility, these could be words of approval, support, pride, or some kind of pleasure: a trip to the zoo or attractions. When he behaves irresponsibly, you should not criticize, blame, or put pressure. Give him the opportunity to experience the consequences of this behavior. If you haven’t done your homework, you’ll get a bad grade, which means you’ll need to spend extra personal time studying and retaking it. Even at this age, a child needs to learn to understand that every action has its consequences. The main thing is to remember that this is a child, and he is just learning, and your support is the strongest support for him. After all, you are an assistant for him, an authoritative person whom he can trust. As soon as you start solving his problems yourself, performing all his tasks (taking out the trash, doing homework, etc.), you are depriving yourself of authority in the child’s eyes. In the future, most likely, you will simply be manipulated into taking further responsibility for yourself. |
| Question for a psychologist: Hello! The situation is this: when my son was 13, I got married a second time, my husband had a 16-year-old daughter from his first marriage, I became friends with her (it was difficult and long), but I became friends. My husband and my son are sometimes fine, sometimes shouting and swearing. Since childhood, I missed my son (upbringing), gave him little love and attention, now I understand this, but I can’t return anything. We had three children together, now my son is 18, and our kids are 4, 2 years and 3 months old. The elder treats everything irresponsibly, promises a lot, even swears, but does not fulfill his promises even regarding serious and important things. I understand that he needs attention, but he is not interested in talking to me, and I don’t know how to bring him closer. He doesn’t want to do anything at home, and occasionally steals money from me. I quit studying, I don’t like my job, I work for a month in different places, or even for several days, with no money in sight. He only promises all the time. I understand that he is probably also jealous, although this is not openly visible. Help, how can I catch up on what I didn’t take into account before? |
| Hello. This behavior of your son looks like a kind of rebellion. And you shouldn’t miss the fact that he is 18, and this is still a period of teenage crisis, searching for oneself as an individual, a certain border of transition into adulthood. No wonder he resists. While your mother was arranging her personal life and building relationships with someone else’s child, your son was destined for himself; he learned to be alone, without his mother’s love and support. Perhaps, with all his behavior and actions, your son is trying to show that he is already an adult and decides for himself how to be and what to do. First of all, in order for your son to listen to you, it is important to regain his trust. You will have to find a way to talk if you really realize that you haven't been paying enough attention, if you feel guilty and want to correct the situation. Tell him about it and ask him to help you. Honesty and sincerity are important. Become his friend first. And remember, your son will sense any lies and insincerity and will appreciate your honesty. At any age, children need the love and support of their parents. Good luck to you! |
A man’s irresponsibility irritates a woman, since the chosen one is in no hurry to take on even the slightest obligations and is constantly lazy, literally without leaving the couch. This gives rise to a lot of problems in a couple: constant quarrels amid a lack of money, unresolved everyday issues, unfulfilled promises. In turn, a woman’s irresponsibility and laziness scares off men in the same way. It is unlikely that anyone will rush home from work if a mess and an indifferent person are waiting for them there.
| Question for a psychologist: Hello, dear psychologists. |
| Hello Asia. In order to take any action towards your husband, ask yourself two questions and answer as honestly as possible: - Why do I (neither children, nor parents, nor society, namely you) need this (to re-educate my husband)? — Am I ready to be a mother for my man? Your husband has learned to live this way and found his comfort zone. You can shout, threaten, manipulate, persuade, but you are unlikely to be able to change him. You have already allowed him this pattern of behavior, accepted it. The only thing that will definitely happen is that you will develop a number of nervous diseases. Although many women unknowingly find just such men to fulfill their needs: “to be a mother”, “to be a nanny”. In them they realize a sense of need and significance, they want to be indispensable for a person. Find answers to these questions. Decide what is important to you and change your life, not the other person. Good luck to you! |
My name is Asia, I will probably go crazy until I reach my chosen one. We have been married for 6 years, and we already have two children, the spitting image of him... My husband has never worked for anyone and now it is very difficult for him to get a job, he is no longer so young... He always says that somewhere around the city work, but I don’t see any results. We've had telecom services for 4 months now, but we haven't paid for our phone number. He says: I’m about to pay, right now... For example, he lied that he paid the nanny’s salary, just so that I wouldn’t yell at him. That's all regarding the financial side, he is absolutely irresponsible in all documents. Oh, you know, I'm tired. He doesn’t need anything, but at least we can go around the world with our children. So irresponsible, he absolutely does not strive to live at least a little better. Not only is he of no use on the street, but also at home: he does everything under pressure or after my tantrums. Tell me what should I do? I also can’t take on everything and I don’t want to, how can I deal with him in a cunning way, because talking no longer works... Help! Or is it like this for everyone? Manifestations of irresponsibility in life
What does an irresponsible person look like?
- Often doesn't keep promises.
- This is an employee who cannot be trusted with an important task.
- You cannot rely on an irresponsible husband.
- He gets down to business, but doesn't finish it.
- An irresponsible wife is a slob and a bad housewife.
- An irresponsible child can study well or poorly. The distinguishing feature here is that he is late and does not come to competitions for trivial reasons. Signs up for a club and does not attend it.
- Constantly being late for work by an irresponsible person. But there are people with an innate sense of time, they are punctual. At the same time, they can be irresponsible.
There are many situations in which this trait can manifest itself. It all depends on the individual and the circumstances.
How to deal with irresponsibility and laziness: 6 recommendations
The first step is to recognize the fact that it is irresponsibility in relationships and life that prevents you from being happy and successful. What's next? Take advantage of valuable recommendations from psychologists:
Learn to finish what you start
An irresponsible person is not able to bring a single task to its logical conclusion. He is hampered by laziness and the habit of putting everything off for later.
It won't be easy, but start small - set specific deadlines for completing specific tasks. And be sure to complete them, even if you have to do it through “I don’t want to.” Whether it's cleaning the house or an important project at work.
Learn to plan
The life of an irresponsible person is not organized. Therefore, it is important to learn how to plan things and predict the consequences of your own actions. If you have a clear daily routine in front of you, it will become much easier for you to complete current tasks.
Try to calculate your steps towards achieving your goal. And every time you want to give up everything, think about this: disruption of plans can negatively affect not only you specifically, but also the people around you. This will spur more decisive action.
A clear daily routine and the ability to plan are especially important in the fight against irresponsibility and laziness in adolescents, for whom, at the stage of personality formation, it is important to learn, first of all, self-discipline.
Get rid of fears
A person free from fears lives easily, because he is confident in himself and does not “pull the cat by the tail” when something urgent or important needs to be done.
It is extremely difficult to fight irresponsibility when it is supported by fear of failure. Overcoming self-doubt is a real feat for a person who is not used to acting decisively. But it’s important to give yourself the right to make mistakes. Remember that failure is not a complete defeat, but a powerful motivation to keep moving forward and improve. [3]
Set goals for yourself
It is important for an irresponsible person to grow up and understand that only he is responsible for his actions and words. Yes, someone you know can help in some matters, but this will not always be the case. That’s why you need to learn to set goals for yourself, and most importantly, to move decisively toward them. [3]
There are no unattainable goals. There is a high laziness factor and a whole bunch of excuses. Surround yourself with people whose level you want to live up to and reach out to them in every way possible.
Don't sit still
Leave the passive lifestyle aside. It's time to act! Start by at least cleaning your apartment. Further more. Finish the things you started, meet old friends, make it a rule to spend time with your loved ones. A responsible person never sits idle.
How to overcome irresponsibility
There are 4 methods of dealing with irresponsibility:
- Learn to complete tasks to completion. Don't undertake it if you're not sure you'll get it done. And if you undertake it, do it.
- Remember your responsibilities. You must be respectful to your family. They are obligated to be responsible for their children and raise them.
- Learn to tell yourself: “No.” In this world, permissiveness is possible only among irresponsible people.
- Ask those around you to control themselves. Remind, pull, correct. This way you will enter the role position of a responsible person.
Don't take on too much. You must answer for every promise.
Attempts to instill responsibility in others are an initially unsuccessful task. A person is born with a set of qualities. They are partially adjusted due to external circumstances: upbringing, events, lifestyle. A person can change himself on his own, but for this he will have to spend a lot of effort, a lot of time, and make a lot of effort. Habits don't give up so easily. It is impossible to change a person from the outside. Don't flatter yourself. No amount of threats or blackmail will help.
How laziness breeds irresponsibility
Quite often, a person’s irresponsibility is considered a consequence of the pathological habit of laziness.
Laziness is a lack or complete absence of hard work. A lazy person gives preference to free time over work. This gradually becomes an unhealthy pattern of behavior. A person cannot force himself to do even important things, cannot take responsibility for basic decisions and puts off completing current tasks until later. In this case, the person is often called irresponsible, but in fact he is pathologically lazy. [2]
According to many psychologists, complete irresponsibility is a way to disguise one’s own laziness, fears and anxiety, an attempt to escape from reality. [2]
conclusions
If you are wondering how to get rid of irresponsibility, you are on the right track. Take control, make a commitment, and start striving for excellence. Irresponsibility and responsibility are two sides of the same coin. This is not the most difficult improvement; it is much more difficult to fight complexes and phobias. Developing a useful quality in yourself is a difficult task, but it is doable. The main thing is to set a goal and take a small step towards it every day. Remember that this quality decorates, helps to achieve success in life, get a promotion at work and compliments among friends.
Yulia Dovgal
Author of articles. Student at Moscow International University, Faculty of Psychological Counseling. I understand phobias, complexes, and psychological trauma.
Repeated failures and errors in the work of personnel
The most common management pain is when a manager has to finish their subordinates’ work. Once I corrected errors in the report, twice... By the third time everyone understood the existing situation and did not even try to make fewer mistakes. Why, if the manager will fix everything as it should? But if a person does not learn from his own mistakes, he makes exactly the same mistakes in repeated situations.
“Time after time - the same thing!” Is this a familiar phrase? A responsible manager will not allow an employee to make the same mistake twice in a row, because he will not redo his shortcomings. Literally slap yourself on the wrist every time it seems that “it’s easier to do it yourself quickly than to explain.”
Parallel pandemic - indifference and irresponsibility
Analysis of events for the week from the head of the Higher School of Organization and Management of Healthcare (HSOUZ), Doctor of Medical Sciences. Guzel Ulumbekova.
This week has shown that some regional authorities continue to ignore President Vladimir Putin’s instructions that payments to medical workers for work with coronavirus should be carried out without interruption. Finance Minister Anton Siluanov is also not ready to understand and act in the logic of preserving the Russian people - everything is simple for him: there is not enough money in the budget, which means we will take from those for whom there is no one to stand up. And it does not take into account that the mortality rate of Russians in June increased by 18% compared to June last year. Today, more than ever, it is important for the medical elite to defend the interests of the industry, and therefore of Russian patients.
Saturday morning, August 8, began with a letter from a close colleague: “My comrade from Kamensk-Shakhtinsk, Rostov region, with whom we previously served as military doctors, has already been summoned twice to the Investigative Committee, they made it clear that Covid payments are not due to doctors from this hospital.”
the situation in the hospital in Kamensk-Shakhtinsky is terrible. Monthly payments to doctors for six months now amount to 10–15 thousand rubles
, and that's it! Municipal authorities are cruelly indifferent, regional authorities, instead of coming and personally solving the problem, sent inspections. Doctors and nurses appeal to the authorities and residents of the city, calling for justice and asking for the solidarity of their colleagues.
It is clear that our colleagues are tired of constant stress
, in which you have to work,
out of despair, from the indifference of others
. Under such conditions, it is impossible to fulfill one’s duty to patients. I think that a similar situation has developed not only in Kamensk-Shakhtinsky, but also in many small and large cities and villages of our country.
And this happens to people in whose hands are the health and life of the Russian people. I just want to shout: who will help people?! After all, medical personnel are a resource that is difficult to replenish; it cannot be wasted so carelessly; it must be protected, at least for our own sake.
On Medical Worker Day on June 16, Vladimir Putin highly praised the work of doctors and assured that all payments would be made. “Without any exaggeration, I want to say: we are sincerely proud and admire your behavior, your professional feat. “He helped each of us to more fully understand and feel the true value of life and the significance of the work to which you dedicated your life... In turn, I ask the Government and the Ministry of Health of the country to keep the issues of payments to medical workers under constant control so that there are no failures here,”
- he said.
It’s a shame for the governor of the Rostov region Vasily Golubev, who, even with his bare hands, should have long ago corrected the situation that has been going on for several months. And if there are no funds in the region, then he must go to Moscow and sit in the reception room of the Minister of Finance until he returns with money for his healthcare.
It’s hard to believe that Russia’s finance minister is ignoring Vladimir Putin’s instructions on the need to increase spending on health care. On July 13, the President emphasized: “We also have to implement already planned measures to develop and strengthen the healthcare system, and direct additional resources to this.”
And on August 6, Anton Siluanov calmly announced that federal budget expenditures under this item would be reduced by 10%. This means that the availability of medical care will further decrease, as will the salaries of medical workers.
And this also means that
there is no one to stand up
.
After all, for some reason, funds for investments in railways were not reduced, but for nuclear energy they were reduced by only 2%. The Minister of Finance must understand that cutting funding for health care is a direct blow to the preservation of the people.
And the task of the Minister of Health and the Minister of Economy is to carry out the instructions of the President and prove to the Minister of Finance that he is wrong.
Moreover, there was no “miracle” with low mortality in Russia during the epidemic: in June, 18% (25 thousand people) more Russians died than in the same period last year.
I would like the feeling of bitterness and shame for what is happening to be felt not only by me, but by the entire society, and, of course, the medical elite. We must prove to the authorities and society that Russian healthcare is not enough with targeted solutions and half-measures, and that radical reform is long overdue
. A reform that will correct the intolerable situation of health workers; will increase government spending on health care to 6% of GDP (without this it will be impossible to change anything); will centralize the health care management and financing system; will eliminate insurance market mechanisms that have shown to be ineffective; will ensure that prescription drugs are available to all patients, not just those with benefits; will revive primary care; will restore school and industrial medicine.
Meanwhile, in Europe and the US, the value of healthcare workers is well understood. In comparable money, doctors’ salaries are 2–3 times higher than ours
.
There they are prohibited from working more than 40 hours a week
so as not to get tired and make mistakes when treating patients. Today, the US National Academy of Medical Sciences stands proudly behind its colleagues, who are much better off financially than ours. Its president, Victor Dzau, published a letter to the US Congress on August 6 calling for immediate federal and regional measures to protect healthcare workers from stress and burnout. Among them are centralized monitoring of their health status, the organization of special departments in hospitals responsible for a favorable environment, the allocation of federal funds to restore their health, and the organization of anonymous hotlines.
Who will stand up for our colleagues - Russian doctors, nurses, junior staff? They are tired, demotivated and no longer believe that things will change for the better. I would like to recall the words of the great German pathologist Rudolf Virchow: “Medicine is not only healing, it is also politics.”
This means that we must be able to defend the interests of healthcare before the authorities.
Today in Russia, systemic healthcare reform is vitally needed to save the health and lives of our people.
Moreover, when the majority of citizens have had their incomes significantly reduced, which means they will not be able to pay for medical care out of their own pockets.
And especially since our country lags significantly behind key health indicators from neighboring European countries that are close to Russia in terms of economic development (Hungary, Czech Republic, Poland, etc.). Our life expectancy is almost 5 years lower than theirs, and the mortality rate of the working-age population is 3 times higher than in Europe.
The time has come when the medical elite of Russia - the medical department of the Russian Academy of Sciences, the Council of the National Medical Chamber, heads of professional medical associations, the Committee for Health Protection of the State Duma of the Russian Federation, the Commission for the Protection of Citizens' Health and Health Development of the Public Chamber of the Russian Federation, rectors and teaching staff of medical universities We must show solidarity and speak out in defense of our colleagues, our industry, and therefore in defense of our patients and maintaining peace in society.
Today is the moment of truth. Each of them must decide for himself whether he supports the reform or waits for everything to resolve itself. But it won’t resolve itself, it will fall apart.
The atmosphere in the team is growing tense
Feedback to employees, given without taking into account personal responsibility, provokes an unhealthy atmosphere in the team. “Nobody wants to work”, “Everyone is always late”, “There is no one to rely on” - these and other general phrases hit the ears of those who can be relied upon the most and who are always on time. And they get offended, work worse, or quit altogether. And for the rest, such phrases are like white noise; there is no longer any responsibility from such phrases, because “most likely, they don’t mean me.”
WHAT IS RESPONSIBILITY?
Let's first be clear about what the term "responsibility" actually means. The word “responsibility” is a noun that does not designate an object and, as a result, each person puts a unique meaning into this word, known only to him alone. There are different definitions of the word “responsibility”. For example, “criminal liability” and “financial liability,” but these are more synonyms for the word punishment, “assigning responsibility through the KPI system” is more about motivation than about results...
So what is “responsibility” from a management perspective?
Wikipedia says: Responsibility is the ability (by one's actions and/or inaction) to influence the outcome Ron Hubbard says: Responsibility is the awareness/feeling of oneself as the cause of what is happening
Thus, by “responsibility” I mean when AT THE SAME TIME an employee is able to influence the result (he has the necessary knowledge and authority) and the employee feels like he is the cause of what is happening (sincerely believes that the result depends on him).
Interesting conclusions can already be drawn:
An employee who lacks knowledge and skills, by definition, cannot be responsible for completing a task. This is why RACI matrices often separate the roles of “responsible” and “performer”
Each employee of the company (even a cleaner in a holding of 10k+ people) is responsible for its financial results (at a minimum she receives a salary and this reduces the financial result)
