Any motivation for studying, as well as constant support in all difficulties encountered on the path of education, is an integral part of the formation of a child’s psychological comfort. Psychologists advise parents to think over a competent strategy for behavior with the baby, which all family members must adhere to.
This can be done by having knowledge about the types of motivation, as well as ways to encourage a child to play sports, music, lessons or learn English.
Reasons for reluctance to study
How to motivate a child to study (a psychologist’s advice often offers a whole range of influence options) must be decided based on the initial reasons for his reluctance to acquire new knowledge.
How to motivate a child to study: a psychologist’s advice to parents will tell them how to behave in this difficult situation
The most common circumstances that have a significant impact on the loss of interest in studying are:
Reasons for reluctance to study | What should parents pay attention to first of all to correct the situation? |
Excessive stress, emotional or physical fatigue | Review the child’s daily routine and, after discussing with him, refuse, for example, from attending one of the additional sections. |
Exacerbation of diseases or spontaneous occurrence of physical discomfort (headaches, bloating, etc.) associated with the child’s overwhelming excitement on the eve of attending an educational institution | Talk to the student, listen carefully to him and identify what exactly makes him think about not wanting to attend a particular educational institution. |
Negative perception of the teacher (conflicts, excessive severity, rudeness, demandingness on the part of the teacher) | Having clarified the circumstances that force the child to fear the teacher, discuss with the teacher his ways of motivating the younger generation |
Quarrels or misunderstandings with classmates or children of other ages also attending this educational institution | Together with your child, work through several possible options for resolving conflict situations, which he can put into practice in his school life |
Lack of encouragement for success from parents | Pay attention to the merits and efforts of the student, even if they are not sufficient to receive an excellent grade from the teacher |
Fears associated with the child’s inability to be in a group and to seek common ground with peers | Help your child find common interests with his classmates by inviting him, for example, to go to the cinema to see a film that is currently being discussed by young people |
Difficulties in learning, in particular the insufficient amount of knowledge a particular child has necessary to cope with the simplest tasks | Try to improve your child on your own by filling in the gaps in knowledge with relevant information. If parents are unable to help the student on their own, it is necessary to seek the services of a tutor. |
Lack of interest in a particular subject or unwillingness to spend time studying that could be spent on entertainment | Give arguments that can prove to a child of a particular age the importance of self-development for his future life. For example, link the need to study a specific subject with obtaining an appropriate higher education upon graduation from school |
Unpreparedness to attend an educational institution, in particular its psychological component | As often as possible, in conversations with your child, speak positively about his educational institution, focusing on points considered to be the advantages of the school for a student of a particular age |
Misunderstanding of the reasons for being within the walls of an educational institution | Help a growing person correctly set priorities, guiding him to the final conclusion about the need to attend school to achieve his life goals |
Having found out the circumstances, parents, after consulting with a psychologist, need to begin correcting the situation as soon as possible. Otherwise, the child may withdraw into himself , forever cutting off the connecting thread with his mother and father, who have lost authority in his eyes.
Who is responsible for motivation?
Parents often shift responsibility for their child’s reluctance to learn to teachers.
Like, if a child doesn’t like mathematics, it means that the teacher is bad and doesn’t know how to present the lesson in a way that will interest the child. Of course, there is some truth in this. But the habit of learning and instilling a love of learning cannot be limited to school walls. And it is wrong to completely abdicate responsibility for the fact that your elementary school student does not want to do his homework. The skills and knowledge that a child receives at school play a decisive role in his intellectual and social development. But he always needs parental support. Article on the topic Hello, school! Is your baby ready to learn?
Should a child be forced to study?
Motivating a child to study does not mean forcing him to fulfill the demands of adults. Psychologists, in their advice on how to stimulate a child’s desire to acquire new knowledge, recommend that parents do not put pressure on him, but try to understand and give confidence that his feelings are respected.
The absence of the need for violence against one’s own child, manifested in the fact that he is forced to be a diligent student, should be due to the parents’ understanding of the circumstances of the modern world. Some school knowledge is not only not useful, but is often forgotten by students over time.
But the knowledge that determines the concept of literacy must be memorized by every student, regardless of his desire. To make basic information easier to digest, teachers should diversify the educational program , and parents should show great patience and empathy for their child.
Could you have caused the problem?
Often, parents are partly to blame for a child’s lack of motivation to study. The desire to learn new things is the norm for children. If a child has the right attitudes, he will strive for creativity and gain knowledge. But if his parents, for example, are used to punishing him with lessons (if he didn’t clear the table - read the paragraph), then he will get the impression that studying is not a way to grow above himself and achieve his goals, but a punishment that must be avoided at all costs.
Another mistake is to scold his teachers in front of a child. This deprives teachers of authority in children's eyes. Showing a child that in a possible conflict with a teacher you will protect him and help him correct his mistakes is one thing, but turning him against teachers is another. Children will not want to learn from people they don't respect.
Of course, the wrong attitude is not the only possible reason why a student does not want to study. Let's look at the most common ones and think about how to get your child ready to study.
What is motivation?
How to motivate a child to study (a psychologist’s advice on this issue can be found freely available on the Internet) should be decided by parents, using their knowledge of existing types of motivation. They vary depending on the baby's temperament.
The character of children can be divided into groups:
- Discoverer . Such children strive to explore something new, and it is important for them that this information contributes to their overall understanding of how the world works. An argument that pushes such people to action may be the idea that a particular theorem has not yet been proven, or that a topic discussed in class is still disputed by scientists with different points of view.
- Practitioner . It is important to understand the purpose of acquiring certain knowledge. They need to be constantly explained how their studies will be useful to them in practice in the future.
- Unconditional winner . It is important to be first in everything. The inability to be the best in any area provokes apathy and reluctance to try their hand in the future. To motivate them, it is necessary to focus their attention on the fact that only by overcoming difficulties in their studies will they be able to gain recognition from their classmates and become the best among their peers.
- Team player . Stimulates collaboration with other people. Seeing that he brings benefit to others, a child with such a temperament becomes inspired and increases his desire to gain new knowledge. They can be motivated by the understanding that they are an example for their peers , who, repeating after him, begin to change for the better.
- Challenge lover . What motivates them to take action is the awareness that they have been challenged. The constant desire to test their abilities can be used by the parents of such a child as an incentive to study or any other type of activity.
What parents need to know about motivation
Where should parents start if they want to promptly motivate their child to study? According to psychologists, this requires the development of such educational motives in the future student as:
- desire to learn and acquire knowledge;
- enjoy the learning process;
- encouragement to make independent discoveries in the classroom;
- desire for academic success at school;
- desire to receive high grades for your knowledge;
- the desire to perform tasks correctly and diligently;
- desire for positive communication with classmates and teachers;
- ability to comply with school requirements;
- self-control skills.
Parents should instill this attitude towards future studies in their child from early childhood, when he is just beginning to explore the world. But what to do if the child has already become a schoolchild, but the desire to learn has not appeared? Parents of first-graders need to take this problem seriously and try to understand to what extent it exists in the child. A simple psychological test that can be performed at home will help determine the level of motivation and degree of adaptation of a young student at school.
Test - questionnaire
An adult, in a confidential conversation, asks the child and records his answers:
- Do you like school or not so much? (not really; like; don’t like)
- In the morning when you wake up, are you always happy to go to school or do you want to stay at home? (most often I want to stay at home; it varies; I go with joy)
- If the teacher said that all students do not have to come to school tomorrow, those who wish can stay at home, would you go to school or stay at home? (I don’t know; I would have stayed at home; I would have gone to school)
- Do you like it when some classes are cancelled? (don’t like it; it varies; I like it)
- Would you like to not be given homework? (would like to; would not like to; don’t know)
- Would you like there to be only breaks at school? (I don’t know; I wouldn’t like; I would like)
- Would you like to have a less strict teacher? (I don’t know exactly; I would like to; I would not like to)
- Do you have many friends in your class? (many; few; no friends)
- Do you like your classmates? (like; not very much; don’t like)
- (Question for parents) Does your child often tell you about school? (often; rarely; don’t tell)
A positive attitude towards school is assessed as 3 points; neutral answer (I don’t know, it varies, etc.) – 1 point; negative attitude towards school – 0 points.
25 – 30 points – high level of educational motivation. Students have high cognitive motives and the desire to successfully fulfill all the requirements. They very clearly follow all the teacher’s instructions, are conscientious and responsible, and worry if they receive unsatisfactory grades or comments from the teacher.
20 – 24 points – good school motivation. The majority of primary school students who successfully cope with educational activities have similar indicators.
15 – 19 points – positive attitude towards school, but extra-curricular situations are attractive. Schoolchildren feel comfortable in the school environment, but they strive to communicate more with friends and teachers. They like to feel like students and have beautiful school supplies (backpack, pens, notebooks).
10 – 14 points – low learning motivation. Schoolchildren are reluctant to attend school and prefer to skip classes. During lessons they often do extraneous things. Experience serious difficulties in educational activities. They are in a state of unstable adaptation to school.
Below 10 points – a negative attitude towards school, school maladjustment. Such children experience serious difficulties at school, as they cannot cope with their studies and have problems communicating with classmates and teachers. They often perceive school as a hostile environment; they may cry and ask to go home. Often, students can show aggression, refuse to complete assignments, or follow rules. These students often have mental health problems.
Recommendations from psychologists to parents
How to motivate a child to study (a psychologist’s advice can be useful when parents study this issue) is a question that arises before young mothers and fathers in raising their child.
In order for a small family member to grow up in comfortable psychological conditions, experts advise:
- do not force the child to unquestioningly follow instructions;
- in case of refusal of any request, explain your position to the younger person;
- talk to your son or daughter as much as possible;
- takes children's problems seriously;
- do not ridicule the child’s failures;
- do not discuss the student’s abilities in a negative way with other people;
- seek common interests with your child;
- always fulfill previously made promises, without giving any reason to doubt yourself;
- be sincerely interested in routine events that happened in the life of your son or daughter;
- give your child personal space and give him time every day for activities that he likes;
- limit the time a growing person spends in front of a computer or TV screen, replacing it with joint walks or, alternatively, family games.
Parents need to listen and, if possible, fulfill the child’s requests, which seem insignificant at first glance.
Review your reward system
There is one real story about how a man potty trained his little daughter by giving her candy. Once, when there were no sweets at hand, he tried to give the baby an “imaginary” chocolate bar. The girl smiled and jumped up from the pot, but it turned out to be empty. Dad asked his daughter a question about what it was. She replied that she pretended to pee in the potty.
This story is a clear demonstration of how smart and resourceful children can be. Despite their age, kids quickly get used to the environment and find ways to earn encouragement without fulfilling the requests of adults. Moreover, research shows that reward systems only have short-term effects.
Small rewards for completed tasks help overcome a temporary crisis - for example, when a child begins to master letters or numbers. Reward motivates the little guy to do something. Only over time does he begin to depend more and more on the reward: if the baby is deprived of it, he stops trying. The same thing happens with adults: as long as a person is paid, he works conscientiously. If a person loses his salary, he will simply stop working, because he will have no motivation left.
This rule also applies to activities that bring pleasure. An interesting experiment was conducted by scientists at Stanford University. They gathered a group of children and asked them to draw with markers. The pastime itself is interesting, only this time they also paid for it. The children really enjoyed drawing, but when they stopped getting paid, they refused to continue. We can conclude that reward kills passion and interest even in enjoyable activities.
How to form positive habits in a child, if not with the help of small bribes? Experts say that the job of parents is to encourage their children. Focus your child's attention on how nice it feels when you acquire a new skill and mom and dad are proud of you. This way he will begin to feel satisfied with his success. Has your child learned to ride a bike? Praise him, tell him that he should be proud of himself, because it was difficult to master this skill. A sense of your own mastery motivates you to develop further.
Read also: how to properly encourage a child
Advice from a psychologist on how to interest a child in learning
How to motivate a child to study (a psychologist’s advice to parents varies depending on the child’s temperament and secondary circumstances) parents should decide by studying the recommendations of specialists on this issue.
Qualified psychologists working with children strongly advise mothers and fathers:
- provide the child with maximum opportunities for independent acquaintance with the world , support him in his endeavors, and also not interfere with the study of a subject that is unnecessary, in the parents’ opinion;
- provoke interest in various types of activities by attending events not only within the educational institution, but also outside its walls;
- teach the younger generation to competently organize their own time, devoting proper time to rest, in order to avoid physical and moral overload of the student;
- set mini-goals for the student, the achievement of which will not require much effort from the little person, and their achievement will inspire him to conquer new heights;
- encourage and praise the child, seeing his efforts, even if insufficient to achieve the goal;
- help your child get used to the idea of personal responsibility for obtaining results;
- demonstrate by example a thirst for new knowledge , as well as a positive attitude towards the educational institution the student attends;
- do homework in the form of a game, thus artificially arousing the child’s interest in learning;
- explain how strong the relationship is between the student’s interests and the need to study a specific example.
for example: if a child wants to work as an architect in the future, it is important to know the basics of geometry, drawing, and algebra perfectly.
A capable child, but lazy and lacking motivation.
When parents send their child to school, they are faced with various problems, such as learning difficulties, self-doubt, difficulties communicating with classmates, lack of interest in a particular subject and many others. And it happens that parents are faced with the following problem: a capable and smart child, but does not want to study, is lazy, does not want to do homework. What could be the reason for such a situation and what ways out of it can be offered to parents? Possible reason: Laziness as a protest. Very often laziness is a defensive reaction of the child’s psyche. In what situations can a child’s body put up such a specific block? First of all, if they demand more from a child than he is capable of. Such an excessive demand can also manifest itself in the overall workload on the child, when he has too many classes, clubs, tutors, as well as in an excessive pace of learning in a particular lesson. Laziness in this case is the simplest and most understandable way to relax. Options for getting out of the situation: • Review the child’s schedule, unload it. Every child should have free, unregulated time. This time is useful not only for relaxation. In free time from intensive classes, the child’s brain works in a defocused mode and forms layers of information at a deep level, which is extremely useful when studying mathematics and technical sciences. • Analyze whether you or the teacher are setting too high goals for the child. Perhaps you need to slow down, slow down, because it’s not in vain that they say: “The slower you go, the further you will go.” How does this slowdown work: for example, instead of asking a child to solve math problems for some time with the goal of solving as many as possible, offer him 2-3 problems and ask him not to rush, but to concentrate on the quality of the actions he performs. It is likely that the child will solve a small number of problems without haste without errors or with minimal errors, will receive satisfaction from the work done and, in addition, will better understand the material being worked on. What else can give impetus to laziness? The love and recognition of a child and his successes are payment for his labors. All parents rejoice at the success of their children. But not everyone knows how to react correctly to mistakes. If a child is constantly scolded for mistakes, this again turns on the “Laziness as a protest” mechanism. Option to get out of the situation: • Analyze how you react to your child’s mistakes. Do you scold him? The correct approach is not to scold, but to discuss. Dialogue, reflection, the ability to find one’s mistakes - these skills must be developed in a child. This approach to mistakes will help you not only fight laziness and reluctance to learn, but will also help your child make great progress in learning. Every mistake can be a small push forward. The great inventor Thomas Edison, who was recognized at school as completely incapable of mathematics, considered all his mistakes as inevitable on the path to success: “Forget about such a thing as failure - there are just unexpected results that will serve you as a valuable lesson in the future.” Possible reason: Laziness is inherited from the parents If mom and dad, after working a hard day at work, come home and spend the entire time during which the child is watching them, sitting in front of the TV or with their nose to the tablet, then the child simply follows their example. And there are other situations when parents are constantly busy with business, but at the same time they say that they are very overloaded, or talk about their work as something uninteresting, difficult, and not loved. The child immediately makes a natural conclusion that any work (and the child’s work is learning) is hard, not interesting and not desirable. So why should a child get involved with this? Option to get out of the situation: • Try to be more positive and easier about your necessary tasks and responsibilities! Do them with a smile, perhaps a song, and certainly without complaints! Possible reason: Laziness and lack of motivation due to lack of real success If a child is involved in many sections and clubs, and in the entire wide area of his interests in conjunction with school activities, there is no place where he is successful, where he would take some kind of prize, holding a diploma in his hands, or hearing that his work on some subject is one of the best or simply worthy of being noted, he loses motivation to study. Options for getting out of the situation: • The child should have something where he will have visible achievements. It could be anything from swimming to cooking. Try to find an area in which your child can open up. • If you are struggling with a reluctance to engage in a particular activity or subject, such as math, offer your child a wide variety of challenges and don't go overboard with the difficulty. Only having learned the taste of success on some, albeit not difficult, tasks, even if only of a certain type, will your child be ready to move forward to further mastery of the subject with a positive attitude. Possible reason: Lack or lack of interest. "Interesting!" - this is the main motivation for a child in the learning process. Children move in mastering any material by leaps and bounds when they are interested. And, of course, dry and boring presentation at school often deprives children of motivation to study. Options for overcoming the situation: • It is necessary to approach learning creatively. Of course, you will not be able to redesign the school, but you can choose additional classes not on the principle of focusing on results, but on the principle of an engaging learning process. • You can work with children yourself, complementing and going beyond the school curriculum. Your main assistants in this should be two techniques that are very loved by all children: play and exiting the plane (leaflet, notebook) into real space. For example, you want to master the multiplication table with your child. Don’t follow the school stereotype: cramming and solving a million examples to consolidate and test your skills. Choose or invent a game for this purpose, lay out constructions of cubes on the floor, arrange a card tournament based on the multiplication table to test your success. There are no limits to your imagination. This will be a very interesting process, which means there will be a result and a positive attitude towards learning.
Ways to motivate your child to play music
Psychologists categorically do not recommend that parents implement personal unfulfilled plans for life in their children. For example, you should not force a child to study music if he is not interested in it, but his mother dreamed of becoming a professional violinist as a child.
A story that explains the reasons for the child’s reluctance to continue playing music, and gives advice on what to do in such cases:
It also happens that giving up your hobby is temporary and can be regarded as a kind of protest. In this case, parents need to make every effort to motivate their child to continue what they started.
To return a child’s desire to study music, psychologists recommend:
- find out the true reason for the rejection from what he loved (if during the conversation it turns out that a small family member never liked music, and he went there for fear of disobeying adults, you should invite him to discuss options for other activities that will bring him pleasure) ;
- sincerely ask the future musician to organize home concerts for family and friends, admire his abilities and encourage him for his efforts;
- do everything to help the child feel comfortable on stage (for example, attend additional classes in performing arts for this purpose, and so on);
- evaluate the professionalism and attentiveness of the teacher in relation to a particular student (children often lose motivation due to the teacher’s incorrect behavior).
You can find a friend for your child, ideally one of the same age, with similar hobbies.
How to do homework
The rules for completing homework assignments should vary depending on the age of the student. For example, a student attending primary school needs to take breaks to rest and change activities every 15 minutes.
High school students do not need this and can complete their homework at once without being distracted by extraneous matters.
General recommendations from experts regarding the correct completion of homework include:
- structuring the total amount of work assigned (this can be a plan with notes or an extensive list);
- gaining confidence that the child understands a specific task and is ready to complete it;
- do not put off doing homework until the evening, but also do not start working on notebooks immediately after the student returns from school;
- provide the student with comfortable conditions (for example, the absence of extraneous sounds, reasons for interrupting activities, and so on);
- start with the most difficult or unpleasant part of the work (in such a case, the child will strive to begin simple tasks as soon as possible, making every effort to overcome the first stage);
If homework requires a lot of time from the student, and parents see that the child is tired, then it is advisable to pause, offering, for example, to have a snack together.
What exactly should you not do?
So, we found out that the age-old parental question “How to make a child learn” is inherently incorrect: you need to make the child want to learn on his own. What can stop him from doing this?
Pressure and threats
Children and teenagers are even less willing than adults to do something under pressure. There is a risk of causing the opposite effect, not to mention the fact that you will ruin your relationship with your child. If you threaten to deprive your child of something that is meaningful to him and he takes the threat seriously, then perhaps he will actually begin to pay more attention to his studies. But it is also possible that he will begin to hide grades and dates of parent-teacher conferences by all means, hide from you and be afraid. Do you really need this?
Doing homework for a child
What's the point of a child straining if his mom or dad does everything for him? This is how infantile people grow up, unable to make decisions and take care of themselves. When helping with homework, it is important to help, that is, to explain incomprehensible material and guide the child to the correct answer. It is important that he not only formulate a solution to the problem, but also understand why it is what it is, and be able to solve a similar problem himself in the future.
Ignoring children's preferences
Even if it seems to you that your child is obliged to sit at mathematics textbooks, but he prefers literature, do not scold him or convince him to live the way you want. Let him develop in an area that interests him, and simply not abandon the rest. No matter how much you would like it, your child will not be able to do everything perfectly at once - this is not necessary.
Comparison with others in their favor
Trying to instill in a child an interest in learning through good examples, you can go too far. For example, if you constantly compare your son or daughter to other children who are better students and generally more successful, this will only turn the child against you and those you hold up as an example. Who else but you should know that your child is unique and needs an individual approach. And the attitude “you are worse than others” can seriously harm a child’s psyche - and this will affect not only schoolwork.
Another dubious method is constant external motivation: if you write an “excellent” test on a test, I’ll buy a smartphone, if you do your homework, I’ll let you go out with a friend... As a rule, such measures have a short-term effect. It is impossible to keep a child's interest forever in this way. Sooner or later, it will still be discovered that the child does not want to go to school, because all incentives have disappeared.
How to motivate your child to play sports
Experts assess the situation, finding out whether the desire to play sports is really not a method of realizing the unfulfilled plans of parents.
The main part of the recommendations of experts comes down to the following advice from professionals:
- help the child decide on his preferred sport, based on his abilities, physical development and financial capabilities of the family (the last point is important due to the required costs for the appropriate sports equipment, equipment, and so on);
- go to the store with a small family member to buy sports uniforms, entrusting him with the last vote;
- attend sporting events and competitions in the chosen sport with the whole family, focusing the child’s attention on the strength and endurance of professional participants;
- convince the future athlete that failures in the business he has started will not make his family or friends respect or love him less;
- to prove by personal example the importance of sport in the life of every person (for health, appearance, development of internal qualities, and so on).
How to motivate your child to learn English
The study of foreign languages is a mandatory part of the modern school education system. Qualified teachers argue that it is necessary to start motivating a child to learn English as early as possible.
According to psychologists, you can instill in a student a desire to understand foreigners by:
- regularly describing opportunities to those who can speak English fluently (for example, an internship or work in England);
- watching American films with subtitles, noting that people who understand the language can always be the first to appreciate new foreign films and books;
- listening to the child’s favorite songs in English (this will not only develop auditory perception of foreign speech, but will also encourage the student to translate the text in order to understand the meaning of the work);
- conducting classes in a playful way (with young children) or, using English words in everyday speech, communicating on current topics (with teenagers and children of middle school age);
- conducting joint home lessons (for parents who do not know English).
You can use the child’s knowledge in important matters, for example, reading and translating instructions for a new piece of household appliances, and so on.
In what cases is the help of a psychologist needed?
Despite the wide range of opportunities to motivate a child to study, some parents note the failure of all attempts made. In some cases, a child’s indifference to self-education or another previously favorite activity may become a reason for moms and dads to turn to a psychologist for help.
Intervention by a qualified specialist is necessary in the following cases:
- frequent illnesses of the baby;
- occurrence of aggression towards parents or sisters, brothers;
- periodic sudden changes in mood;
- formation of sudden isolation;
- the presence of groundless whims and frequent hysterics.
But do not forget that each parent decides independently how to motivate their child to study!
Only close relatives will be able to choose the most suitable option for stimulating their baby among the numerous recommendations of psychologists. It is important to remember the main rule: parents must give their offspring the confidence that they will be loved and accepted by anyone in the family, even despite possible failures in education or sports.
Article design: E. Chaikina