Delicacy Delicate
Delicacy as a personality quality is the ability, if necessary, to avoid unpleasant topics, memories, intonations in relationships with others; readiness to subtly feel the situation or condition of a person and, in word or deed, create an environment in which he would not feel the awkwardness and inconvenience of his position.
The company went to the dacha to celebrate a birthday. They sit by the fire, finishing cooking the kebabs. The girl approaches the grill, blows into it for some reason, the ashes fly up and get into her eyes - her eyes water, she runs away to wash herself. He comes back and sits down - the makeup is gone. Everyone didn’t recognize it at first, then the birthday boy so timidly: “Oh... Svetochka... and you turn out to be so cute!”
Delicacy comes from Lat. Delicatus - “gentle, subtle, refined, pampered”, that is, it implies attentiveness to the feelings of others, subtle sympathy and corresponding benevolent behavior towards them. A person with such a demonstrated personality quality is usually helpful, polite in dealing with people and things, gentle in communication and attitudes towards anything, respectful of people, attentive and friendly to the rights of another person to be different, to have his own unique vision peace.
She has no equal in her ability to delicately capture the original, purely individual aspects of personality. But it is not enough to reveal the originality and uniqueness of another person; you also need to be able to take him into account with due attention, sensitivity and scrupulousness. A tactful person always and everywhere knows how to behave and be in place; he easily and naturally accepts the usual manner of communication for this group of people. In contrast to tactfulness, which is associated with external forms of manifestation, delicacy is a deeply internal quality of a personality, a property of its mental structure. Possessing special spiritual sensitivity, delicacy does not burden others with its problems, does not invade other people’s lives, and does not suffer from intrusive politeness and annoying servility.
Delicacy can serve both vices and virtues. In conjunction with greed and avarice, it helps to quickly find ways, means and methods to realize one’s longed desire. For example, the husband cannot imagine his future life without a car, he does not eat, does not sleep - he just saves money. If he behaves delicately at work with his superiors, the chance of a salary increase and, accordingly, purchasing the desired car will increase.
Despite the “omnivorous” and accommodating delicacy, it does not live where the mind, feelings and intelligence are saturated with selfishness. Delicacy presupposes a subtle and deep knowledge of human nature, its needs and desires; it is aimed at taking into account the interests of other people and caring for their well-being. An inveterate, deep-seated egoist thinks only about himself, his mind is turned off by the false Ego. Unlike delicacy, he is unable and unwilling to think about the sharp corners and unpleasant moments of the lives of those around him, and, moreover, to resolve their important and painful issues.
In other words, delicacy and selfishness cannot exist together. An egoist, concerned about his weight, will constantly raise this topic in a society of people suffering from obesity, without even noticing that it is unpleasant to others. An egoist, as soon as he gets someone’s ears, immediately begins to “burden” those around him with his sores. Like a vampire, he feeds on someone else's energy, splashed into space by the negative emotions of his listeners. Even direct statements from people that it is not delicate to talk about their illnesses, there is a doctor for this, do not have the desired effect on the egoist.
A sensitive person is a skilled master of constructing communication on the most pressing topics with the most pleasant impression possible. Georg Wilhelm Friedrich Hegel wrote: “...delicacy consists in not doing or saying what the surrounding conditions do not allow.” Delicacy, if there is no urgent need for it, evades and avoids topics and memories of the past that are unpleasant for a person, but when this cannot be avoided, it boldly goes towards “sore” issues. What usually throws people off balance is not the unpleasant moment, topic or memory itself, but the way it is presented. Even in an ordinary conversation, everything flows quietly and calmly until someone’s False Ego turns on. As soon as it becomes interested in the conversation, confrontation, argument and swearing immediately begins. Someone else’s rude speech tells the other side: “If he is rude, it means he is wrong.” The False Ego insistently repeats: “All the accusations against you are not fair.” Since true delicacy is devoid of selfishness, it can speak from the heart on sensitive topics in such a way that the interlocutor will feel comfortable and at ease. When you don’t hear rudeness, hatred and malice in another person’s words, when his entire friendly and benevolent appearance speaks of a desire to help, you can listen to many unpleasant things. Delicate speech is filled with respect, gentleness, calm and goodwill, so it is pleasant to listen to. The egoist screams, gushes with negative emotions - who will believe him and listen to him?
To better understand the essence of delicacy, let us tell the following parable. Once, talking with a certain Lieutenant who was carefully preparing to leave for the Earth training ground about acquiring the skills of self-control in Earth conditions and, in particular, about the delicacy of speech, the Commander said: “Usually people are unrestrained in emotions and quick to fight.” At the slightest disagreement with their opinion, they raise their voices, shout, and often, when the arguments are exhausted or the words do not have the expected effect, they switch to insults, using a sarcastic tone, ambiguous expressions and hints, derogatory or abusive words for greater effect. However, I want to assure you that no one anywhere likes loudmouths, arguers, brawlers, much less offenders. Your speech should always be pleasant to the interlocutor: affectionate with children, friendly with people close to you and exquisitely polite with everyone else. .
If the need arises to express disagreement or a negative opinion on any official issue, make a remark to a child, or point out the wrong actions of a friend, try to find words that, while beneficial, would not be offensive to the one to whom they are intended.
Delicacy is a personality trait of strong people. For the weak, what it does and how it manifests itself is called cowardice. Only among weak-willed people does delicacy become the cultivated companion of cowardice and timidity. Weakness sees itself in delicacy. Only a strong person can generously allow himself to be delicate, and this is understandable: delicate behavior should really nourish, support and increase.
Weakness can only divide and take away. Power will not “tear its vest”, proving that it is right, will not look for the opponent’s “sore spots” in order to deal a painful blow to them and, thus, prove its point of view, which is equivalent to confirming its importance for itself and those around it, necessity and importance. Delicacy, as a derivative of force, will move away from a meaningless dispute, avoid a conflict situation and retreat even more convinced of the correctness of its position - not causing harm or trouble to other people.
Petr Kovalev Other articles by the author: https://www.podskazki.info/karta-statej/
Training techniques for different types of speech for children
To develop different types of speech in children, special training is needed.
Stage speech for children
Stage speech is the basis for the development of acting skills for children, so it is better to train it in preschool age. Stage speech exercises develop the speech apparatus, train diction and articulation, teach you to reflect emotions, control intonation and use it to convey shades of mood.
Scenic speech
Important! Tongue twisters and special games that develop diction and pronunciation are best suited for training stage speech.
Examples of several exercises:
- Depict various emotions through facial expressions and gestures (sadness, joy, anger, surprise, etc.)
- Pronounce phrases with different intonations, emphasizing the main word in the sentence. "Hooray! Summer is coming soon!" - joyfully, sadly, scared, with a questioning intonation, like a grandfather.
- Clearly articulating, pronounce tongue twisters. In this case, you need to change the stressed word in the sentence each time, paying attention to the appearance of new shades in the tongue twister. Examples: “The cuckoo bought a hood,” “The jackdaw sat on the fence, the rook started a conversation with her,” “The centipedes have too many legs.”
There are entire collections of exercises and methods for teaching children expressiveness that you can buy or find on your own, and in kindergartens and clubs there are additional courses and consultations for parents that teach this.
Diction exercises for children
Diction is an important tool for understanding other people’s speech, which is why it is so important to work with your child on it from an early age, because in the future, unclear speech can cause ridicule from peers and personal insecurity.
Note! Clear, understandable speech is the key to the attractiveness of any person, which is formed in childhood; experts recommend working with children with poor diction at the age of 2-3 years, otherwise it will become much more difficult to correct it later.
A similar problem is immediately noticeable by ear, but nevertheless, the main indicators of unclear diction in children are:
- Incorrect sound pronunciation
- replacing a voiceless consonant with a voiced one
- abbreviation of difficult to pronounce words
- replacing one sound with another
- and others.
Diction exercises are aimed at strengthening the facial and oral muscles, because you need to learn how to quickly change the position of your lips and tongue.
Famous diction exercises for children:
- Tube. Fold your lips into a tube, stretching them forward, and thus pronounce the sound “u”.
- Smile. You need to smile very widely, without opening your lips.
- Horn. Open your mouth wide and pronounce the sound “a”.
- Bagel. It is necessary to stretch your lips as far as possible, tensing the muscles around you, and pronounce the sound “o”.
- Drummer. You need to hit your upper teeth with your tongue and pronounce “d” along with it.
- Sweetie. Without opening your mouth, rest your tongue on one or the other cheek.
- Spatula. Try to reach the tongue either to the nose or to the chin.
- Needle. With your mouth open, extend your tongue forward as far as possible.
- Horse. Teach a child to click his tongue on the upper palate.
Activation of speech development in preschool children
Articulation exercises
Another type of facial muscle training is articulation gymnastics, which also improves the mobility of the tongue and lips.
Important! Experts recommend doing a small articulatory warm-up first, spending about 5 minutes on it.
Articulation warm-up technique:
- Imagine that there is a ball of air in your mouth and move it from one cheek to the other, then under the upper and lower lips.
- Pull in and puff out your cheeks.
- Move your lower jaw in a circle, up and down, to the sides, back and forth.
- Pretend to yawn by opening your mouth wide.
- Imitate the sound of gargling.
- Alternately touch the palate and the base of the lower teeth, straining the tongue.
- Warm up your lips by stretching them with a tube.
- Imitate the snorting and neighing of a horse.
- Pull your upper or lower lip over your teeth and slide it.
- Reach your tongue either to the chin or to the nose.
- Turn your tongue in your mouth now to the right, now to the left.
- Pull your tongue forward as far as possible.
Exercises for beautiful articulation:
Warm up the tip of the tongue. Hit the teeth with the tip of your tongue, while straining your tongue and pronouncing the syllable “yes” in a row. Then practice pronouncing the consonants “t” and “d”.
Tongue Twisters.
- A stupid, stupid, stupid bull.
- Greek rode across the river.
- Masha walked along the highway and sucked on the dryer.
- (You should begin to pronounce tongue twisters as slowly as required for the most understandable sound of the text. It is also necessary to pay special attention to expressiveness and intonation. You can ask the child to gradually increase the speed of pronunciation.)
Lip exercise.
- Pursing your tense lips inwards, sharply throw the air out of your mouth. A pop should be heard. Together with the exercises, you can practice pronouncing “p” and “b”.
Highlighting endings.
- Sharply highlight the ending of a word, exaggerating the pronunciation of the last sounds and placing emphasis on them.
Exercise for the lip muscles.
- Quickly pronounce the vowels “a” “i” “u” “e” “o” alternately.
