My husband drinks every day: what to do, advice from a psychologist, how to live in the same apartment, behave, talk to an alcoholic, how to break up and forget

According to statistics, every third woman suffers from her man’s addiction to alcohol. What to do if your husband drinks? How to wean a friend off alcohol without his knowledge?

If a man drinks alcohol periodically (for example, on holidays) and in moderation, then there is no need to be overly concerned about this. However, if the husband drinks every day and becomes aggressive, and after drinking does not remember what he did, then this is already a rather serious problem that needs to be solved somehow. Constant consumption of alcohol has an extremely negative effect on the nervous system. A person who is in a state of binge drinking often does not evaluate his actions and does not remember what he did the day before. In a state of unconsciousness, the drinker can cause moral and physical harm. Many women begin to wonder how to leave their alcoholic husband.

What is alcoholism and why is it dangerous?

The World Health Organization claims that today at least 250 million people on the planet suffer from addiction to alcohol. Ethanol, which is the main active ingredient in alcoholic beverages, belongs to the category of psychoactive compounds that have a toxic effect on the central nervous system and cause addiction in a stable form. According to GOST of the early 1970s of the twentieth century, C2H5OH was considered a drug of the depressant type.

Systematic consumption of alcohol leads to cardiovascular diseases, liver cirrhosis, stomach ulcers and various nervous disorders, including severe forms of depression and suicidal tendencies. As a result of ethanol intoxication, strong arousal occurs, accompanied by the release of endorphins. The next stage of poisoning provokes stupor and failure of the nervous system, causing severe damage to the latter.

Another serious danger associated with the use of ethyl alcohol is the health of loved ones and relatives of the addict. A destructive addiction pushes an alcoholic not only into petty theft in order to purchase booze, but also into domestic crimes. According to statistics, most robberies, fights and rapes occur due to the fault of people who were drunk.

Educational literature on the topic of drug addiction describes 4 stages of alcoholism (including zero). Each stage has its own spectrum of negative consequences and parameters, but the most pronounced features of developing addiction are:

absent gag reflex even with heavy libations;
the presence of severe withdrawal syndrome (severe hangover);
constant lies (example: a person who is on fumes claims that he did not drink).

Starting from the second stage of alcoholism, it becomes incredibly difficult for the addict to deal with the hangover syndrome, which does not disappear until consuming a new dose of ethanol. Thus, a vicious circle arises, fraught with prolonged drinking bouts and the transition of alcoholism into forms that are difficult to treat. The transition period between stages often lasts many years, during which social connections and the work situation may remain in a satisfactory state.

Drinking husband - grief in the family

If the head of the family allows himself to indulge in drinking alcohol from time to time or constantly, then, of course, this has a negative impact not only on his life, but also on the lives of his wife, children and other close relatives.

Constant scandals, life in stress and fear

Of course, it is very difficult to avoid scandals in a family with a drinking husband. Sometimes the initiator of conflicts is the man himself, and sometimes his life partner or children. The wife’s claims are not difficult to understand, because a husband who is fond of drinking, as a rule, uses money from the general budget for his needs, which negatively affects the financial situation of the family. Although, of course, first of all, the spouse ruins his health and moral character, setting a bad example for the children, and making them feel ashamed for him. Life with an alcoholic is unbearable, and therefore regular quarrels in such a house are a common occurrence.

There are also cases where alcoholics themselves initiate scandals. Not all of them go to bed after drinking alcohol or do not react in any way to their spouse’s anger - many of them are quite aggressive. Things can go as far as gross insults, destruction of the house, assault, theft of expensive things and other terrible phenomena. While remaining with such a person, the family is constantly under stress. Even when the patient has a period of calm, family members remain afraid that “drunken concerts” will resume any day, which most often does happen.

A drunk man is not a father and a bad example to his children

If children grow up in such a family, then this is a particularly difficult situation. People who were forced to live in a dysfunctional family almost always suffer serious mental trauma into adulthood. Some women, perhaps having forgotten how to think sensibly because of living with an alcoholic, doom not only themselves to torment, but also leave no choice for their children. A drinking man cannot be a good father, but such women believe that “some kind of father” is better than no father at all. This is an absurd opinion! Most often, as adults, the children of such couples do not want to communicate not only with their father, but also with their mother, realizing that she has doomed them to life with an alcoholic. Often such children grow up rather “downtrodden”, and sometimes simply dysfunctional, feeling ashamed of their family in front of their peers. Many women believe that their friends are unaware of their problem, but most often this is not the case.

Shame in society

It is quite difficult to avoid social shame when there is an alcoholic in the family. It is worth noting that most wives and children try to hide this fact from acquaintances, employees and friends, feeling awkward. Sometimes you can actually do this, but it doesn’t take away the stress.

A woman living in a marriage with a drinking man is constantly afraid that her drunken husband will accidentally be met by someone on the street, and as a result, their shameful family secret will become public knowledge. It is also quite dangerous to visit with such a spouse or invite guests to your home, because almost after the first drink he can show himself “in all his glory.” Being the wife of an alcoholic, and at the same time raising children from him, a woman is often ashamed to admit this to others, so as not to hear that she is a bad mother or, for fear of looking like a loser in the eyes of friends who are more successful in family life or just acquaintances. Of course, by hushing up the problem, a woman significantly aggravates it.

What reasons drive you to drink?

Why do men drink alcohol? Psychology claims that modern man has many prerequisites for the emergence of a dangerous dependence on ethanol. Among the most popular factors contributing to the development of destructive addictions are:

The presence of difficulties along the path of life. The more stress there is, the higher the likelihood that a man will begin to get rid of it with the help of alcoholic beverages. After drinking, life for a short moment seems good and full of tempting prospects.
Weakness of spirit. Emotional instability pushes a man to seek happiness at the bottom of a glass, and due to cowardice, he cannot refuse friends who offer to celebrate a holiday or simply get drunk out of boredom.
Hereditary factor. The predisposition to ethanol abuse can be transmitted at the genetic level. In order to minimize potential risks, a person should study his own family tree and avoid the mistakes of his ancestors. That is, completely give up alcohol.

Some psychologists are of the view that a woman who has attracted a drinking spouse into her life is herself the owner of a negative birth program. Thus, it turns out that it is unlikely that it will be possible to avoid repeating similar patterns in the future. In such a situation, it makes sense to stop placing all responsibility for alcoholism on the husband, realizing his own involvement in the resulting problem. There are often cases when the cause of a man’s addiction is imperiousness, excessive touchiness and unfounded claims on the part of his wife.

conclusions

Beer is an insidious alcohol that consumes a person unnoticed, causing persistent addiction. By drinking beer every day, you can become a real alcoholic. Treatment of the disease will become almost impossible.

If your husband likes to drink a foamy drink in the evenings and does it every day, you need to fight the addiction. There are many methods, ranging from banal conversations to treatment in a drug treatment clinic.

In any case, no matter what path you choose, it is important to remember that this addiction destroys the human body and psyche without a chance of full recovery.

Where is the line between a drunkard and an alcoholic?

A drunkard is a person who has a strong emotional attachment to alcohol. He is still able to stop after a glass of cognac or a bottle of beer, but alcohol plays a very important role in his life. Holidays, weekends and memorable events are closely associated with alcohol, which without the usual libations seem incredibly boring and dull. Even if a person called a drunkard drinks in the evening after a hard day, the next day he will appear at the workplace without delay and in a neat appearance.

A drunkard can go abstinent for several days or weeks without noticeable discomfort. He is unfamiliar with withdrawal symptoms, and even a large amount of ethanol taken at a party will not provoke such severe intoxication as in the case of an alcohol addict. A drunkard can be a moderate drinker and be able to control himself.

An alcoholic is a person with a stable dependence on ethanol at the physiological level. If alcohol stops entering the body, the alcoholic will experience syndrome o), accompanied by vomiting, increased aggressiveness and other negative symptoms. Unlike a drunkard, a dependent person does not have sufficient willpower to independently stop using products containing ethanol. He is able to get rid of his addiction only with the support of his immediate environment, as well as professional narcologists and psychologists. The fact of alcohol dependence can be determined by the following factors:

The occurrence of alcoholic delirium (delirium tremens) upon refusal of further consumption of alcoholic beverages. Psychosis is usually accompanied by tactile, auditory or visual hallucinations, delusions, fever and severe chills.
An addicted person begins to neglect work, social contacts and finds himself in various situations of increased danger (for example, driving a vehicle while very drunk).
The addiction to ethanol comes to the fore: the subject spends a lot of time searching for alcohol or the cash needed to purchase it.
The skin of the face takes on a pale yellow tint.
Memory loss after heavy drinking. Difficulties in recalling a chain of events in memory after ethanol poisoning are called alcoholic palimpsest in medicine.

Without alcohol, an alcoholic experiences both moral and severe physical discomfort. The world around him is perceived as aggressive and devoid of bright colors. A person with an established physiological dependence on ethanol gets drunk very quickly, literally from the first drinks. The reason for this phenomenon lies in various malfunctions of the filtering organs.

The first criterion that indicates the presence of an unhealthy hobby in a potential chosen one is a hangover syndrome, accompanied by a strong craving for alcohol. A subject who does not suffer from alcohol dependence does not feel the desire to “knock over a shot glass” the morning after drinking. On the contrary, the very thought of consuming products containing ethanol makes him feel sick and disgusted. An alcoholic will accept the idea of continuing the banquet with great enthusiasm.

There is an alternative version, according to which the concepts of “drunkard” and “alcoholic” are identical. The term "drunkard" is common and is not used in official medical practice. This designation is used in cases where a person experiences a strong psychological dependence on alcohol, but does not yet have serious degenerative changes in the liver and other internal organs. It is important to note that from drunkenness to alcoholism is just one step.

Safe methods of subduing a person who is intoxicated

According to narcologists and psychiatrists, calling an aggressive drunkard to calm down is often simply useless. Therefore, instead of thinking about how to calm a drunk person, it is better to take care of your safety. To avoid being a victim of violence, you should isolate yourself and wait it out if possible.

Put to sleep

Wives of alcohol-dependent men usually know how to pacify their husbands during attacks of aggression. Some of them simply ignore any attacks in their direction, and if it comes to assault, they try to leave the house for a while or at least lock themselves in a separate room. And some people think that the best way out of the situation is to put the man to sleep. After all, when a drunk husband sleeps, he is definitely not dangerous.

To do this, women can use various tricks, including tricking them into giving them a sedative to drink. However, using sleeping pills while intoxicated is very dangerous. Why? Let's look at it in the next section.

What to do if your husband drinks - advice from a psychologist

Why does a man drink? Psychology as a science does not have a clear answer to this question, but there is the concept of “codependency.” A similar disorder is observed in people who are forced to share shelter with a person suffering from one or another bad habit. In this group of people, the risk of developing neuroses and various mental problems increases significantly. Permanent stress is often intensified by a feeling of shame for the drinking husband, exposing himself to ridicule in front of neighbors and acquaintances.

The insidiousness of addiction to ethanol is that a person, as a rule, passes the stage of transition from drunkenness to severe dependence. The first stage of alcoholism is expressed in permanent “stress relief” after a hard day at work, on weekends, during a trip to the country or fishing. In the initial stages, the subject can maintain a neat appearance and skillfully hide the fact of his own dependence on others.

Important! Subsequent stages are characterized by prolonged binges from 2-3 days to several months and are accompanied by epileptic seizures, manic delirium and hallucinations.

Treatment and subsequent rehabilitation of an alcoholic can last from several months to many years. Moreover, during this period the addict will need not only moral support, but also permanent control. Persons cohabiting with a regular drinker should take into account the following recommendations:

“Absentia” treatment without the knowledge of the patient is unlikely to lead to positive results. The decision to get rid of an addiction should come only from the addict himself.
Presenting information in an ultimatum form will not lead to any good. You will have to use a diplomatic approach in order to convey to your drinking spouse the scale of the negative changes inherent in this destructive habit.

Children raised in a family where at least one parent has an unhealthy addiction to alcoholic beverages differ from their peers from more prosperous families. They are characterized by increased irritability, unmotivated aggression and a feeling of inferiority. A negative example leaves a negative imprint on the child’s entire future life. To get rid of such neuroses, the help of qualified hypnotists and psychologists is often required.

It is no secret that alcoholic husbands make bad fathers who do not give their offspring due attention and material support. An addict drinks alone, locked in an apartment, or disappears from morning until late at night with the same friends in search of alcohol or funds to buy it. Of course, he doesn’t care about his own children, their hobbies and achievements. Therefore, to demand from such a parent the manifestation of paternal feelings would be great stupidity on the part of the woman.

Alcoholism is a disease that is very difficult to get rid of on your own. This is not the case when the problem resolves itself, and without the help of a specialist in the person of a qualified psychologist or hypnotist, it is incredibly difficult to solve. It is impossible to get rid of addiction through violence. This requires the desire of the alcoholic himself, who has recognized the fact of a painful addiction.

Main signs of addiction

It is important to understand that alcoholism develops gradually. By seeing the first signs of addiction in time, you can convince a man to overcome his addiction before he turns into a drunkard. In some cases, it’s worth thinking about and suspecting something is wrong:

the attitude towards alcohol has changed; without it, vacations and holidays are not a joy;
the man begins to often stay late at work or gatherings with friends, and comes home drunk;
the husband began to drink much more often and more than usual;
an alcoholic looks for any excuse to drink;
during and after intoxication, memory lapses appear;
aggression towards family and friends appeared.

Understanding from close relatives is critically important for someone suffering from alcohol addiction. Without psychological support, coping with this problem is difficult or even impossible.

How to help my alcoholic husband? Psychologists have clear answers to this question. You should not scold, insult or humiliate an alcoholic. Sometimes wives begin to educate their spouse, especially when they come out of a drinking binge. Such care is harmful and has the opposite effect. Overcontrol, setting excessive demands, and frequent family scandals due to alcoholism only erect emotional barriers between spouses.

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Is it worth living with an alcoholic: advice from a psychologist

How to live with an alcoholic husband? Psychological advice should be provided depending on the specific situation and individual characteristics of the drinker. First of all, professionals recommend that the wife of a drinker decide whether she wants to live next to the addict and make efforts to rid him of his destructive addiction. The process of fighting a bad habit is very difficult and lengthy.

If a woman has a dilemma: to stay under the same roof with a rowdy and drunkard or to go “free swimming”, she should ask herself whether her feelings for the addict are still intact. If the answer is positive, it is recommended not to keep emotions to yourself, hoping that the husband will come to his senses and “get his head together” on his own. If, even after a frank conversation, the husband stubbornly continues to consider himself free from bad habits and is not going to part with the bottle, the woman should move from words to actions, namely:

Make attempts to stabilize the microclimate in the family, creating the warmest and most trusting atmosphere possible. Misunderstanding and rejection from others is one of the most common reasons that pushes a person to drink.
Offer your spouse an exciting activity that will act as a worthy alternative to drinking alcoholic beverages. This could be a long-forgotten favorite hobby of the husband or a new and completely unfamiliar activity, such as diving or freestyle wrestling.
If your husband has gone on a long drinking binge and does not show up at home, you should not call his buddies or friends in order to obtain information about his whereabouts.

The above recommendations did not bring positive results, and my husband drinks, what should I do? The psychologist’s advice would be this: under no circumstances should you convey a feeling of pity to the addict. Despite the apparent contradiction, this feeling actually carries destructive potential, creating a stronger connection between the alcoholic and the object of his adoration. But indulging his whims is also strongly discouraged, justifying the motives that led to the development of a painful addiction.

If there is no strength to be in the same apartment with an alcoholic, and it is not possible to kick him out of the occupied living space by legal means, it is necessary to protect the rest of your family members from aggression on his part. In the event of a fit of rage under the influence of ethanol, it is necessary to urgently evacuate loved ones to a safe place, having first called an ambulance to pacify the rowdy.

Reviews

Galina, 46 years old: My husband drank beer every day. Never limited to 1 glass. Of course, we often argued about this, but my husband didn’t hear me. I tried a bunch of methods - conversations, folk methods, conspiracies. Nothing helped. I decided to file for divorce because there was no hope left. When I told my husband, he thought about it and decided to code. The clinic helped us, and I’m glad about that. We managed to save the family, but I’m still afraid that one day, when I walk into the room, I’ll see him again with a bottle of beer.

An alcoholic husband: what a woman should do, advice from a psychologist

How to break up and forget an alcoholic? The advice of a psychologist in this situation will be ambiguous. The difficulty is that if a woman escapes from her dependent spouse, life will improve for a while. However, in the future there is a high probability of repeating a series of similar events with another chosen one or family member. Therefore, even if a woman is determined to break up with her drinking husband, she should not:

use the threat of divorce as a tool of manipulation;
continue to accumulate grievances, claims and disgust towards the alcoholic;
hide or destroy stocks of alcohol;
act as a provocateur of scandals and showdowns;
give the same type of arguments like “look, who do you look like?”

How should a woman behave if her husband drinks often? Psychologists recommend not to give up, and despite the painful addiction of your spouse, to devote time to yourself. You need to find a worthy hobby, such as a yoga, Pilates or dance class, that allows you to spend evenings outside the home. New experiences, acquaintances, various seminars and meetings with friends on weekends are an excellent alternative to vegetating within four walls, trying once again to “brainwash” your drinking husband.

A woman who has managed to increase the scale of self-love will not let her child be offended. If a drunken roommate raises a hand against him, she will make every effort to ensure that this fact does not go unpunished. Instead of changing another person, it will be much more effective to work on yourself. Then self-esteem will increase, and the problem will begin to be solved on its own. Some wives cling to alcoholic husbands, fearing that they will remain useless to anyone, even with a child, or even two. A woman with such low self-esteem is really doomed to spend her entire life messing around with an incessant drunkard, whom she herself considered to be a kind of “bird in the hand.”

Before taking certain actions, it is necessary to find out which category of alcoholics your spouse belongs to. People who regularly use can be divided into two categories:

"Quiet." Having taken even a portion of alcohol in excess of their own norm, such people will not go out of their way to prove that they are right. They are not prone to displays of aggression and prefer to drink at home without drinking buddies.
It’s much more difficult with the “violent” ones, because as soon as they drink, they lose the remnants of self-control and pose a real threat to others. This type of addict usually steals money and valuables from loved ones to buy ethanol. They can easily rush with a knife and cause serious injuries, which they will completely forget about in the morning.

Continuing to live under the same roof with a spouse belonging to the second category is very dangerous not only for psychological, but also for physical health. Therefore, it would be very reckless to rely on the fact that the situation will radically change on its own. After one drunken outburst with violence and fighting, the next one is sure to follow. Therefore, in such cases, it is necessary to put the issue bluntly and break off relations with a violent alcoholic, without waiting for catastrophic consequences.

There are often situations when a woman, in desperation, turns to all kinds of traditional healers and healers in the hope of solving the problem without the knowledge of the addict. This option is one of the worst, and a “miracle potion” purchased for a lot of money that needs to be mixed into food will, at best, turn out to be a dummy. In addition, attempts at forced treatment are illegal and subject to criminal liability.

This is interesting! If your spouse, waking up in the morning, cannot remember yesterday’s events and actions, it is worth showing him your drunken adventures and pearls from the outside. To do this, you just need a smartphone equipped with a camera.

Which advice should you choose?

How should the wife of an alcoholic behave if she understands that it is no longer possible to keep the situation as it is out of pity for her husband. Is it worth saving a marriage if the husband drinks? You can find advice for the wives of an alcoholic that sounds like: yes, of course, you have to hold on at all costs and save the relationship, pull your husband out of the abyss. Others have the opposite opinion: no, under no circumstances, you need to run as far as possible so that you never find it.

Who should you listen to? In this situation there cannot be a 100% correct answer. If the relationship has not yet gone far: there is no common household, common capital, children, then the best option would be to separate. However, not everyone will be able to accept this decision as a way out of the current situation. But they should know: if the drinking husband does not want to change or is unable to change his habits, the problem will only get worse. Alcoholism and everything negative that is present in relationships will only increase.

But if the relationship is already at a mature stage, the situation is much worse. When you need to decide whether to keep your family together or get a divorce, you need to take into account the following factors:

how often the husband behaves in an inappropriate manner;
Is it possible to communicate with him?
the husband swears and insults or is calm;
Is it difficult to pacify a drunkard husband when he has drunk;
how it affects the wife and her physical and emotional health.

It often happens that a raging drunkard is difficult to calm down. Therefore, psychologists say that a woman who decides to endure insults and even beatings from a calling husband, who cannot be calmed down after drinking alcohol, does not respect herself. Therefore, if your husband beats you, you need to leave.

It also happens that the wife of an alcoholic, when her husband drinks, does not leave him because he supports and ensures the material well-being of the family. Especially if it doesn't work. In such a situation, it is very important to find a job to get rid of financial dependence.

Sometimes the wife of an alcoholic, replacing the search for answers to unpleasant questions, how to leave an alcoholic or how to decide on a divorce, begins to nag the drunkard. This makes it worse for everyone: husband, wife, and children. But at the same time, feeling her hopelessness, the woman, driven by her husband’s alcoholism, does not seriously consider divorcing her husband, and she has no time to kick her husband out of the house.

How to deal with an alcoholic: advice from a psychologist

If the husband is an alcoholic, the advice of a psychologist who knows his business well will most likely be somewhat unexpected: you need to stop helping him. If your spouse collapses drunk late at night and falls asleep in the hallway right on someone’s boots, covering him with a warm blanket is strongly not recommended. The need to take responsibility for one's own actions is a factor that deters a person from going on a long binge.

It’s not worth solving your husband’s problems caused by drunkenness: after a call from a sobering-up center or a drinking establishment where he owes money, it’s best to calmly continue working or get on with previously planned matters. There is practically no point in hiding the true order of things from relatives and colleagues. Attempts to instill in an addict a sense of shame most often result only in a deeper escape from problems into the kingdom of the green serpent.

How to talk to an alcoholic? The psychologist's advice is as follows:

It is necessary to get the alcoholic to admit his own addiction. Otherwise, he is unlikely to give up a “harmless” habit that helps him rest and relax;
You shouldn’t justify a binge drunk who complains about a hard life filled with injustice. Ethanol is a depressant, that is, it has a depressing effect on the central nervous system, and in any case will not save anyone from disappointment and sadness;
It doesn't make much sense to brainwash a person while drunk. At best, he will simply forget most of the information received. To start a serious conversation, you should wait until the subject is sober;
demonstrating external calm and pretending that nothing is happening is far from the best option. Silencing a problem usually only leads to its aggravation, but not to its resolution.

How to live with an alcoholic in the same apartment? Advice in this situation can be given approximately as follows: as practice shows, it is impossible to force a drunkard to give up drinking by open confrontation, swearing and shouting. Instead of constantly scolding, it is recommended to make the addict look at the current situation from a different angle. The priority task is to maintain calm in conflict situations, since without patience it is definitely not worth getting involved in a difficult battle with the “green serpent”.

Important! Expressing dissatisfaction with a drinking spouse about unfulfilled duties or promises should only be done in a delicate manner. Constant grumbling and swearing using obscene language does not lead to positive results.

5 unconventional remedies to help you stop drinking

Alternative healing methods have been practiced for hundreds of centuries:

Washing hands with soap enchanted by Vanga's prayer . New unused soap should be spoken with the following sentence: “Don’t drink or drink, God’s servant (husband’s name), don’t walk around the house drunk! Wash your hands with this soap and you will forget about alcohol for the remaining years! Amen!". As you pronounce your sentence, look closely at the soap. Repeat the spell 10 times and put the charmed soap in the soap dish.
Conspiracy for knives. Text of the plot: “Knives! If you don’t drink water and vodka, then the servant of God (husband’s name) wouldn’t drink alcohol, I’ll forget about it forever!” First, place a large saucepan filled with water on the fire. When the liquid boils, place 7 knives in the vessel one by one and recite the spell 7 times. Wash the floor with water and pour it onto the intersection.
Tincture for bedbugs. Live bugs (10-30 pieces) need to be thrown into a 0.5 liter bottle of vodka and left for several days. Drinking such a drink will disgust your spouse.
Herbal decoction . Make a decoction of bearberry leaves (80 g of herb per glass of water). Give the drink once a day, 1 tbsp. l.
Eating sour apples. You need to give them to your spouse in the amount of 1 kg per day.

Be sure to read:

How to survive a family life crisis painlessly: 5 main periods

Unconventional methods have saved thousands of lives from death in alcoholic oblivion.

How to live with an alcoholic - advice from a psychologist

Does your husband drink every day? The psychologist’s advice for women is to pay attention to the analysis of the reasons that led to the development of the current situation. Many unmarried girls are attracted to men who behave cheekily after a few drinks. However, after a short period of time from marriage, they “suddenly” understand that they want to see a completely different person next to them - a non-drinker, hard-working and obedient. And they rush to remake the husband in their own way, which only aggravates his addiction, transferring it from the category of drunkenness to the category of alcoholism.

Psychologists advise women who find themselves in an unenviable situation with an abusive spouse to take care of children, housework, and do not forget to take care of themselves. The focus of attention towards an alcoholic husband should be shifted towards personal interests and adhere to the following practical recommendations:

stop providing the dependent with food;
stop cooking, washing and cleaning up after him;
reduce communication to a minimum;
refuse intimate relationships until the drinking stops.

Such sanctions are necessary, first of all, for the addict himself, since they will fully teach him to bear responsibility for his own choices and actions.

What is codependency?

Codependency is a pathological state of the psyche in which one person is completely absorbed by another, his problems and concerns. Codependency is characterized by constant stress, depression and apathy, irrational decisions, and the feeling that you are being driven by some invisible force. Often a codependent suffers from a constant feeling of guilt, the desire to control the life of another person.

He or she hates himself or herself, ignores his or her own problems and needs for the sake of others, and is constantly stressed. They are deprived of choice and live by the choice of their relative or spouse. If a wife is codependent on her alcoholic husband, any therapy aimed at him will be ineffective, because sooner or later he will return home.

Any psychologist can easily identify codependency. A codependent will endlessly list the bad deeds of her husband or son without saying a word about herself. The main reason for this behavior is low self-esteem.

How to help an alcoholic get rid of addiction?

Living with an alcoholic is very difficult. Advice from a psychologist allows you to get an idea of the current difficult situation and a number of general recommendations. Alcoholism therapy is a very difficult and lengthy process. There is no universal pharmaceutical drug or algorithm that could solve such a problem in the shortest possible time.

Hypnology is considered one of the most effective methods of treating alcohol addiction known today. Hypnosis affects a person with an addiction in the following way:

At the subconscious level, the addict develops an aversion to any product containing ethanol.
The painful craving for alcohol disappears on a psychological level. The subject may again experience joy in simple activities, such as an evening walk or a backyard football match with old friends.
A new reaction is developed to the cause that provoked alcoholism, which is very important for complete recovery.
At the moment of hypnotic influence, the brain comes into a state of high activity, accelerating the process of formation and consolidation of new behavior patterns.

If at the physiological level, addiction to alcohol does not pose such a serious threat (the exception is alcoholism at the last stage), then the problem of psychological dependence is much more difficult to solve. Hypnosis is one of the best therapeutic methods in these situations because it poses less danger than medications and most coding techniques. The following types of hypnotic effects are used for the treatment of alcoholism:

hypnosuggestive treatment (classic version of hypnosis);
Ericksonian hypnosis.

Hypnotherapy has been successfully used to get rid of alcohol addiction since the nineteenth century, and today humanity does not yet know more effective methods. If your husband drinks often or is a full-blown alcoholic, you can personally ask your question to a qualified psychologist-hypnologist Nikita Valeryevich Baturin.

In simple and accessible language, the author conveys to the audience the mechanisms of formation of dependencies and gives working recommendations that make it possible to deal with them very effectively. Unlike many of his colleagues, Nikita Baturin is not afraid to share useful information with the respectable public, and does not make a secret of it. Watch a lot of useful videos on the You-tube channel.

Types of aggression

In world psychological practice, a unified classification of aggression is used, which includes five types of this condition:

Physical aggression is a direct manifestation of force directed at another person;
Indirect aggression , which is carried out in hidden ways (spreading gossip, evil jokes) or is not aimed at a specific person (empty screams, causeless stomping, other types of sudden outbursts of rage);
Irritation is a pronounced reaction to external stimuli, even minor ones;
Verbal aggression – threats, shouting, intimidation;
Negativism is an active or passive opposition to established norms of behavior and traditions of society.

Aggression during alcohol intoxication can manifest itself in any of the listed types. However, in everyday life the most common phenomena are raising the voice, insults and slander, physical violence, even the use of weapons.

Aggression

Often there is also a type of alcoholic aggression called hidden, which is manifested by avoidance of contact with loved ones and harmful inaction. In addition, a person who is intoxicated is capable of harming himself, even committing suicide.

Conspiracies and prayers

Of course, no one will give an exact answer to the question: “How to force your husband to stop drinking using a conspiracy?” Some people trust these methods, while others are skeptical about them. But when there is such grief in a family, women are ready to take any measures. However, it is important to remember that conspiracy should not be the only method of combating the disease. This requires an integrated approach.

You can read the plot to make your husband stop drinking on your own or use the services of healers. But you should be very careful about all the herbs and infusions that they offer. Before accepting the help of a healer, you need to inquire about his reputation and listen to customer reviews. Among the “magicians” there are a lot of scammers who not only do not help, but can also cause harm.

There is a special prayer for the husband to stop drinking. Boniface the Merciful can cure cravings for alcohol; his icon should always be in the house. When reading a prayer, you cannot take your eyes off the face of the saint. There is no specific text; you can address the patron in your own words. The main condition is that the desire to be cured must be conscious and strong.

How to react to this

On numerous forums, women share their life stories. Many are united by a common problem - their husband’s addiction to beer. Often this dependence is not the only one. She is accompanied by a passion for computer games, cards, daily trips to the bar and returning home late. If the spouse is at home, then he is often in no mood, he is irritated and looking for a reason for a quarrel out of nowhere. All household members must be constantly on alert. Scandals and hysterics will primarily harm the spouse. And the image of an unhappy mother will forever take root in the child’s subconscious.

Today and now!

Often alcoholics want to quit drinking, but they always put off this feat until tomorrow. Don't hesitate! This can go on for years: a person either doesn’t drink for weeks, then decides to get drunk for the last time, and everything starts all over again. It's a vicious circle. You need to quit abruptly and forever.

Success comes to those who are ready to spend the rest of their lives without alcohol. To become alcohol-free, all you have to do is not drink. When the brain is cleared of alcohol vapors, the desire to cloud it again does not arise.

People who are coded not of their own free will often return to the bottle again. This is due to the lack of a clearly formed desire to quit drinking. The ban on alcohol helps you survive the first months, when the pangs of withdrawal are most noticeable.

Medicines and medicines

Modern specialists are ready to offer a huge selection of different methods for treating alcoholism, but first of all you need to examine the patient and identify the stage of the disease. Only a narcologist can make the correct diagnosis and prescribe medications. You cannot carry out treatment on your own, as side effects are possible.

If all persuasion is meaningless, and the woman does not know how to persuade her husband to stop drinking, she needs to start by flushing the body. This measure will help remove a hangover and relieve unpleasant symptoms. The narcologist will prescribe pharmacological agents that will cope with this task.

The right incentive

Forcing a person to do something against his will is very difficult, and sometimes impossible. Therefore, we need an incentive that will motivate a man to quit drinking. But first we need to understand what lies at the heart of this problem, why it arose in the first place. The right influence can change a drunkard's thinking and restore his confidence in himself.

So, how can you help your husband stop drinking? Start small. Create comfortable conditions at home and surround your man with care. For a while, you can stop overreacting to another state of intoxication and concentrate your attention on more important things. Only a wife knows her husband well enough to understand what is valuable and important to him. This knowledge must be used to find incentive and motivation.

A woman should ask her husband for help more often, invite him for walks and do everything possible to make him understand that besides alcohol, there are other, real values in life. Shared hobbies, communication with non-drinking friends and a full workload will distract a man from thoughts about the bottle. An excellent application for success will be the desire of a man to break this vicious circle and stop drinking.