How to understand that you have fallen in love: stages of feeling, advice from psychologists

Falling in love is a tender feeling. It leaves pleasant memories of the period and the person even many years later. Passion overwhelms the consciousness, causes excitement, sweeping simultaneously in a storm of languid happiness and bitter experiences. Unfortunately, sometimes, under the influence of surging emotions, we confuse love with a banal habit, passion, ordinary sympathy, in vain encouraging our partner and wasting our time. In this article I will tell you how to understand that you have truly fallen in love with a guy.

The main signs of falling in love

Among the main hints of love are:

Constantly high spirits and expectation of a miracle.
An overwhelming feeling of happiness and joy.
Thoughts and dreams about the object of desire. You will want to be constantly nearby, spend all your free time together.
Sudden initiative, activity, desire to “move mountains,” get a new education, or anything that previously seemed difficult and impracticable.

Love, affection or sympathy

When experiencing attraction to the opposite sex, it is very difficult to immediately understand the sensations. To begin with, it is worth analyzing all the concepts.

Love

The feeling of love is distinguished by a strong emotional component, attraction, attraction. We blindly rush towards the goal, not noticing a person’s shortcomings, we extol him above the clouds.

Attachment

This is a habit that manifests itself in the desire to wake up, walk, cook, watch movies together. It is most clearly expressed after a breakup. This is a kind of dependence on the object. With the usual algorithm, relationships freeze in one place and do not develop, are not supported by emotions, but are considered the most reliable and strong.

Sympathy

We feel an emotional connection and a closeness of spirit. In this case, age or gender does not matter. Sexual motives are completely excluded here. Most often, sympathy arises against the background of common interests and support.

Signs that I'm in love: how to recognize love

This is the deepest sympathy developed against the background of falling in love. It assumes selflessness, complete acceptance of a person with his shortcomings. It can also take place without a sexual component. For example, love for parents, children, animals.

It does not appear out of nowhere, but develops gradually, filling you more and more every day from the inside. Feelings become deeper and more conscious. You have only one interest and all other men are unable to impress.

Differences between infatuation and love

The feeling of being in love flares up instantly, sometimes at first sight. The passion boiling inside will not force you to give up your own benefits for the sake of the object of desire. The desire to see him will become selfish rather than sacrificial. We will be offended if we do not receive similar reciprocal behavior from our partner. All this speaks of falling in love.

Love presupposes selfless help, participation in all life processes of the beloved, empathy without claims and reproaches. Sometimes this feeling is accompanied by jealousy, irritability, depression, and mood swings.

Understand your feelings and desires

First, you need to analyze what emotions and feelings the object of love evokes in you. Perhaps it’s just passion or a temporary clouding of reason that you mistake for the one and only love of your life. Ask yourself the following questions and give honest answers:

How many hours a day do you think about this person?
How has your life changed since falling in love? Do you sleep enough, eat with appetite, etc.?
Are you ready to be with him and support him in the most unforeseen situations: hospital bed, prison, disability, etc.?
Do you want to have children together who are similar to the object of your passion?

If in the end you believe that these are real strong feelings, it is now important to find out whether they are mutual. This can be done, for example, by asking directly, writing a note with recognition, giving a gift with enclosed words of love, or even inviting them to a cafe for dinner with further recognition. If your chosen one experiences the same feelings, then you can confidently answer that a blissful period of mutual courtship, endless correspondence, tender hugs, kisses under the moon and many other pleasant moments of female happiness await you. But what to do if you are unrequitedly in love? There may be several options:

Just wait a while. In the case of fleeting love, emotions will soon subside or move to another object.
Engage in physical and spiritual self-improvement, visit places where your chosen one visits more often. Then he can turn his gaze to your person and become interested.
Find out as much as possible about the object of adoration, about his life, attitude towards the opposite sex, actions, actions, bad habits. It may happen that after some details you simply become disappointed and forget about your feelings.

Listen carefully to your heart and be selective about your desires. And then you yourself will understand how to behave in the right situation.

How to know you're in love - 25 signs

You want to talk about family, children and the further development of relationships.
There are thoughts about the wedding in my head.
There is a desire to sing, dance, and enjoy everything in the world.
Sometimes you accidentally call him by the name of other people around him.
You easily forgive all oddities.
Musical preferences change towards the hobbies of your loved one.
Interest in previous hobbies wanes.
You are willing to sacrifice your time and activities to be around him more.
You don’t notice his shortcomings point-blank and constantly justify them.
An unreasonable smile often appears on the face.
Sometimes you act absent, completely lost in thoughts about your partner.
The scenario of the next date is scrolling through my head, what needs to be said, what to interest.
A kind of rehearsal for a meeting. You look forward to messages or a call, you can not let go of your smartphone for hours or update your page on a social network.
You don’t fall asleep for a long time, dreaming about your lover.
Another way to understand that you are in love is to analyze your reaction to words. Criticism from him is perceived extremely negatively and makes you depressed, while with a compliment you fly higher than the sky.
Constantly talk about it to your family and friends, listing its endless advantages.
You spend more time on your appearance, try to put on beautiful makeup, choose clothes and accessories.
You begin to see signs in all events: you were at the same event, participated in a competition together, or studied at school. This means that we have definitely found the other half.
The girl becomes prone to rash actions: “accidentally” ending up at his entrance, finding a reason to call.
Creative abilities appear: you want to write him a heartbreaking message, a poem, or prepare a treat.
Feels a sudden surge of energy.
An easy way to understand if you are in love is to listen to your body. When we meet, the heartbeat quickens, it makes you feel hot, and your face turns red.
Do you want to be aware of everything that happened in his life.
You dream of physical intimacy: kisses, passion, hugs.
I want romance, spend an unforgettable evening, day together, go on a trip.

What you hate becomes interesting

You can determine if you are in love not only by looking at the girl’s attitude towards the guy, but also by their general leisure time. For example, you used to hate watching sports, but now you go to the stadium with your boyfriend or cheer on his favorite team in front of the TV. You can't understand why you hated football or hockey (or video games, darts, diving), because it's so interesting.

Test: how to understand and find out if I'm in love

A small test that will help you recognize how strong your feelings are:

Psychologist Daria Milai

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Do you understand each other?

We don't know each other well yet.
There have already been several dates, but it’s too early to give a clear answer.
Yes.

Do you support each other?

Just out of politeness.
One person clearly shows more compassion.
Yes, we care about each other;

How do others perceive you?

Like acquaintances.
Like those who try hard to hide the connection.
Like a couple.

Have you visited him?

No.
No, but we are going to.
Yes.

Are there any joint plans for the future?

No.
Yes, but nothing serious, just talking about the next date.
Yes, we are planning a summer vacation together.

Everything is very simple. If the majority of answers are 3, you are clearly in love, if 2, it’s too early to draw conclusions. The number 1 indicates the absence of a close connection.

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What to do with falling in love

I will give you some tips on how to find out, determine that you have fallen in love, and build the right tactics of behavior.

Don't get lost in the whirlpool of events. Don’t give up your favorite hobby and traditions, continue to improve and attend courses. Don't get depressed if something doesn't work out the first time. After all, love should bring joy.
Always smile sincerely in front of a guy. This will not only set you up for positivity, but will also show him that you are a bright, cheerful person.
Don't invent a non-existent image for yourself. Don't say you like what he likes. Behave as naturally as possible. After all, if the relationship works out, it will be difficult to live someone else’s life. In addition, such behavior looks feigned and false, which will immediately alienate the chosen one.
On your first dates, you shouldn’t overwhelm your partner with conversations about serious intentions, marriage and children. To begin with, friendship, tenderness, and trust must arise.
Keep the tone of communication in the middle. Don't be too whiny and affectionate, but don't communicate with indifference and coldness. Let what is in your soul remain a mystery to him.
Do not deny him the desire to watch his favorite film, even if such a topic is not to his liking.
Give compliments more often, praise, call by name. Men love with their ears just as much as girls.
Don't be afraid of this bright feeling. Even if nothing works out, it will be an invaluable experience and vivid experiences.

What is love

Women's opinion

Most women believe that if a man loves her, she will certainly feel and see it. A person in love, in the view of the fair half of humanity, constantly shows signs of attention to the object of sympathy. If a guy rarely calls, rarely invites you on dates, is not particularly generous, and is not interested in the girl’s affairs, then she will think that the boyfriend does not have serious feelings for her.

Most often, women believe that a man’s love is manifested in the actions that they are ready to do for the sake of their chosen ones. Material confirmation of feelings is also important - even if a guy makes small surprises for his beloved, she understands that, most likely, she is not indifferent to him. Also, a woman is usually convinced that a man in love will not be interested in someone else, and if she catches him flirting with a certain lady, then it is quite possible that she will lose faith in his love.

Men's opinion

The overwhelming number of men agree with women in the opinion that love inevitably implies care and various signs of attention. In part, they expect from their chosen one the attitude that their mother showed towards them. In their opinion, a loving woman should be interested in the affairs of her loved one, not deny him intimacy, admire him, listen to his opinion, and the like.

From a psychological point of view

Love comes in different forms, and everyone can express this feeling in their own way. For example, a man may feel an all-consuming and passionate love for one woman. Being infatuated with this woman, he will always strive for physical possession of her.

Over time, feelings may fade away, and the same man will fall in love with another woman, but this time the nature of his love will manifest itself differently - sexual interest will not be expressed as clearly as before, and now the man will strive to take care of his chosen one, patronage.

That is, a man can experience completely different feelings for different women throughout his life, but every time it will be love.

How to tell a guy if she's in love with him

She doesn't flirt with others. All her attention is on you.
She gives surprises and gifts. And it's not about their financial value, but their importance to a man. She smiles when she looks at you and laughs at your jokes.
She closely monitors herself, changes outfits and looks to please you.
She calmly calls and texts first.
Your companion keeps her gaze on you for a long time, and when she becomes noticed, she blushes and is embarrassed.
The girl adjusts her hair and chain, trying to appear more attractive.
She tries to take an interest in his problems and achievements and support him.
He reacts deeply and sincerely to the words of his beloved, he can rejoice or, conversely, be offended, upset and even cry when he hears minor irritation or misunderstanding.

What to do if you fall in love

If a woman has realized her feelings and wants to confess them to the object of her adoration, then she can go in several ways:

Develop relationships gradually and take your time discussing your emotions. There are girls who are shy or afraid to talk about love openly. This is fine.
Speak out and invite the man to be together or hint at it. It is not necessary to wait for the first step from the guy - there is a chance that the feelings are mutual, but he is also shy and embarrassed by them.
Ignore your own emotions and wait for them to evaporate. If a woman understands that her attitude towards a person is irrational, so nothing will work out for them, then there is no point in overstepping yourself. It often happens that the man with whom he fell in love is not a very good person. There is no point in trying to build a family with him.

If a young man has already entered into a relationship with another woman, then there is no need to do anything stupid - try to destroy their connection, win the favor of the young man, or in every possible way provoke a breakup of the couple. You should either tell him about your affection, or move away and minimize communication.

Under no circumstances should you disturb the couple - this will provoke aggression on the part of the man, misunderstanding and irritation.

Stages of falling in love

In addition to the obvious signs described above, there are also stages. In each of them, the personality reveals itself in a new way. Behavior analysis will help you understand whether you are in love or not.

Initial signs

The initial stage of falling in love is the most troubled time. First, an increased interest arises in the object - what he loves, where he lives, what he and his family are interested in, whether he has a soulmate. Next, you begin to imagine how suitable you are for each other. You are attracted to everything about him without exception: humor, voice, actions, figure, clothing style. He speaks funny and appropriately; the others pale in comparison.

You have already planned what your ideal wedding will be, how many children you will have, what kind of house you will live in and where to go on vacation. These thoughts are breathtaking. Even in his obvious shortcomings you find tenderness and constantly justify them. No one bothers you or annoys you.

Secondary symptoms

When you are in love, you do things that are not typical for you. This means that the first stage smoothly flows into the second. Girls begin to take care of themselves, style their curls, apply makeup every day, instead of banal pants and sneakers, wear stylish dresses and heels.

At this time, a person drinks, eats and sleeps less. Hormones produced internally dull other senses.

Women become cooks, poets, singers and try with great effort to show their best sides. However, in the presence of the object of adoration, words often “get stuck” in the throat, thoughts are confused and it is not so easy to collect them into one sentence.

Third stage

The last stage comes when your charm hooks a man, and he begins to pay increased attention to you. Already timid confessions indicate the beginning of a relationship.

Signs that you are in love:

I am infinitely glad to meet you, but you behave more boldly and confidently, without confusing your words. You try to seem honest and natural.
When dating, you show high intelligence and knowledge in many areas.
From the touches, butterflies begin to fly inside your stomach, and your palms treacherously become covered with fine sweat, a wave of excitement covers you.
You are happy when the next date is already scheduled and you don’t have to worry about the outcome of the relationship.

If you notice such signs in yourself, love has definitely settled inside.

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First steps

First, you need to decide on the nature of your feelings: friendly intentions, admiration for popularity and demand, a passing hobby or a real romantic mood.

Method 1: Defining “crush”

This is a fairly broad concept that includes a whole range of different emotions. Conventionally, I will divide it into several types:

Friendly - you can trust a person, need his support and help, but at the same time not be burdened by serious connections.
Admired - when you idealize a person. You are fascinated by his actions and want to gain similar experience. This kind of love fades away when the rapture wanes.
Fleeting. Attraction to the opposite sex is instinctive. While in a relationship, you may feel attracted to other men. This suggests that you are interested in something new.
Romantic - you want to be more than friends, you dream of kisses and hugs.

Method 2: When you are close to your crush

Analyze your behavior. There are three possible types of reactions to a partner. The most common is embarrassment in his presence. The second is, on the contrary, an ardent confidence in one’s superiority, a desire to tease and tease. The third is flirting. You are having a nice conversation, you want him to pay attention to the new dress or hairstyle.

Method 3: When you are at a distance

Do you often mention your lover when talking to others? If this is the case, try not to discuss his shortcomings behind his back; he might find out about it. If you unobtrusively share your emotions with your friends, they will help you understand your feelings. Don't refuse advice.

Psychology of a man in love

The psychology of a man in love is expressed differently.

The hormones serotonin (joy) and oxytocin (stress resistance) are produced in greater volumes. Falling in love gives you a slight feeling of intoxication.

The man's mood rises, he experiences euphoria, he wants to constantly be close to the one he is in love with.

In order for falling in love to move into another stage - love, it takes time. But falling in love cannot be controlled, it is spontaneous. A fleeting glance evaluates the girl’s appearance.

The image of that one, according to scientists, is laid down at the genetic level. From generation to generation, an optimal set of external traits is passed on, which a man unconsciously looks for when choosing a companion.

For falling in love to occur, a casual touch, a short distance (1 m), or an exchange of a few phrases will be enough. Approach to an object is a factor in choosing a partner by smell. If he is attractive, exciting and suitable, then the man falls in love.

Nature has established that a similar genetic makeup increases the chances of having offspring with some kind of abnormality at the genetic level. Therefore, the rejection mechanism works.

Or maybe it's just sexual desire?

There are also non-verbal signs that a man wants a woman, which is quite natural. From them you can easily understand that you have not fallen in love, but want a sexual relationship.

You evaluate her figure , carefully examining the woman from head to toe, stopping your gaze on the hips and chest. At the same time, imagine her naked. Touch your hair, nose, neck discreetly so that she appreciates you too.
Show your jealousy . If others pay attention to her, then it annoys you. If you want to be the only one, you demonstrate to her your superiority over the others. Perhaps you even get into a fight, insult, or threaten your opponents.
You are interested in her sexual preferences , talk about your experience, joke, provoke, hinting at a desire to get closer to her.
You try to make her jealous by discussing the appearance of others, you want to find out how interested the woman is in you.
If you notice a reciprocal passion, then you give gifts with hints: buy underwear, perfumes with pheromones, candles with scents, massage oils.

If a man directly says that he wants intimacy with a woman, significantly saving time on courtship, and this frightens

What a man's love looks like from the outside

Some men clearly demonstrate their sympathy, while others, on the contrary, try to hide their feelings. This is what reveals your feelings.

The man is in a relationship or married . Not every representative of the stronger sex can start dating another woman if he is sealed by marriage, so he tries not to show his sympathies and takes a long time to check their authenticity, perhaps sympathy is deceptive.
Character or feature of male psychology . A man thinks that if he shows his indifference and coldness, then she will love him, but this is a wrong opinion.
The man was lonely for a long time . If a representative of the stronger sex has not had a relationship for a long time, then he can hide his sympathies. Loneliness is the state of a man who is insecure; he is afraid to approach a girl and talk to her.
Bad experience . Often this point runs counter to the previous one. The severe breakup that the man experienced earlier does not allow him to enjoy the wonderful feeling again. He is afraid of repeating his past mistake, of experiencing pain again. Therefore, he looks closely for a long time to get to know her better.
Afraid of being rejected . Not knowing what a woman feels towards him, a representative of the stronger sex is afraid of rejection.

And this is a serious fear, since men have a strong need for recognition

Unsure of his feelings. He weighs everything carefully, which is why he is secretive.
Different ages. It happens that a mature man develops a crush on a young lady. He is afraid of being judged, of facing her misunderstanding, so he tries to suppress this feeling and suffers greatly.

What should I do if he doesn't notice me?

The first and most logical thing to do is to attract the attention of the object of adoration. When you don't know each other, try writing him a message on social networks or adding him as a friend. If he likes you, he will probably show interest. If you communicate, but not as closely as you would like, change your image, and you will attract his interested gaze.

Find out the tastes of your lover, ask his friends about his main hobbies. Analyze what kind of girls he is attracted to and adapt the style to the necessary parameters. Pretend that you are interested in the same things as him: watch a few football matches to stay on topic, talk about a successful fishing trip or an exciting trip. Like-minded people come closer together.

How to understand that you have truly fallen in love with a guy

If all of the following applies to you, then you are definitely in love:

You want to dress beautifully, use cosmetics and perfume. Have you noticed that men have begun to turn around after you? It’s not surprising, because a lady in love emits vibes called hormones of happiness.
The mood changes sharply. Euphoria suddenly gives way to sadness and vice versa. Raging hormones are to blame for everything.
Absent-mindedness and forgetfulness. You answer questions inappropriately, because all your thoughts are about your loved one.

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Signs of falling in love in women

Psychologists name 10 signs that indicate a sublime feeling. A girl is in love with a man if:

Watches him, but is embarrassed to discover it.
She is ready to fulfill his requests, listens to him carefully, laughs at his jokes, and tries to attract attention.
Pushes aside her friends for the sake of communicating with her loved one.
He tries, as if by chance, to touch the object of passion. Sexily straightens her hair and shows off her wrists.
During a conversation, she continuously looks at the man, mirroring his gestures on a subconscious level.
Her pupils are dilated when communicating with her gentleman. This is due to the release of adrenaline.
In the event of a long separation, he tries to get as much information as possible about his beloved.
Gives gifts for no reason.
Jealous. Jealousy can be called the most eloquent manifestation of love.
She is the first to rush to him if, for example, he is sick.

Unrequited love

Many girls, hitting the stone of indifference and suffering, fall into depression from indifferent feelings, become lethargic and apathetic. It's possible to deal with disappointment. Spend time in public more often, appear in the company of friends, make new acquaintances. Take a deep dive into your hobbies and sports activities. Do everything to ensure that you have as little time as possible to think about your unrealized romance.

A change of environment helps. Visit relatives in another city, fly away or go on vacation. From there you will return with fresh thoughts, and perhaps a new lover. Don't waste your life on those who are not interested in you.

Statistics and educational facts

At the first meeting, a guy pays attention to the girl’s face, and not to the subtleties of her figure. And if it seems cute, that’s enough to trigger feelings, even when the silhouette is far from the model’s.
Any coincidence can become the basis of falling in love. Similar facial features, hobbies, field of activity.
A person in love is indecisive and absent-minded.

Another interesting sign that you have fallen in love with a guy is the internal sensations you feel when you are around him. They are similar to strong intoxication.