Symptoms
In simple words, the definition of “fear of men in women” is the answer to the question of what it is – androphobia. Girls who have been exposed to the disease consider men to be the focus of evil and negative qualities, a source of danger and pain.
The problem “I'm afraid of the guy I like” is spreading more and more and is affecting different strata of society. By the way, androphobia is sometimes also characteristic of men - representatives avoid communication with their own gender.
It is necessary to highlight the main group of frightening signs that may indicate androphobia:
- Fear of males, reduction of contacts;
- Rare communication with people of the opposite sex, lack of friends and romantic relationships;
- Refusal to visit public places where there may be a crowd of men.
In severe forms of androphobia, physical symptoms may develop:
- Panic attacks;
- Blood pressure surges;
- Increased sweating;
- Increased heart rate;
- Feeling of difficulty breathing.
It is often almost impossible to diagnose the disease in the early stages on your own. Sometimes an untreated illness ends sadly - a tendency to alcoholism and drug addiction appears, and suicidal thoughts may appear.
You found out why the problem “I'm afraid to live with a guy” can arise. It's time to figure out what causes androphobia.
How to talk to him
Constructing a conversation with a person you are embarrassed about is a very difficult matter. Even if by nature you are quite sociable, well versed in various topics, and know how to carry on a conversation, in the company of a person you like, you may well turn into an inarticulately muttering, confused fool. And this state, of course, cannot but irritate, because in fact you are a completely different person.
If you understand that no efforts give the desired result, or you have made awkwardness that has further aggravated your state of constraint, then it is better to solve the problem immediately and, in a sense, in advance. To do this, you can tell the guy something like “I’m sorry that I sometimes say stupid things, for some reason I just get lost next to you” or “I don’t recognize myself, to be honest, I hope this will pass soon, just be patient, Until I get used to you."
If we look at things more broadly, then a shared event contributes to rapprochement in any form of relationship. When you feel an insurmountable constraint in communicating with a young man, try to arrange a small adventure or event with him, a distracting event. Moreover, both of you must take an active part in this event - literally do something, preferably together.
For example, you go outdoors with friends. Take responsibility (along with your boyfriend) for starting the fire. Simple phrases like “give me this” or “hold it like this” in this situation are so natural and relaxed that they simply cannot cause embarrassment. In addition, at least some result achieved jointly will cause a feeling of belonging and closer psychological contact. Further communication will be easier.
And, finally, willpower is also an effective assistant in this matter. More often, give yourself the attitude that you can handle yourself, that the problem is imaginary and does not exist in reality, that you are charming and the guy definitely likes you, etc. Learn self-control, cultivate willpower, because your state of involuntary embarrassment clearly demonstrates that in You still have a lot of work to do in this area. And willpower will be useful in a wide variety of life circumstances, as well as the ability to find a common language with any interlocutor.
If you are always looking for ways to stop being shy when communicating with guys, then I can help you. Of course, sometimes you can be embarrassed, but guys love confident girls. If you are confident in yourself, you will get the guy you like faster than you think. So, 7 ways to stop being shy about guys.
Don't be afraid to be silly
One of the most effective ways to stop being shy with guys is to not be afraid to be silly sometimes. If you like this music, get up and dance. Who cares? The guy will see you dancing confidently and will join you. Trust me, he will appreciate it.
Don't be afraid to show yourself
I know it's very hard, but if you really want to learn how to stop being shy with guys, then you just need to learn how to open up. If you talk more about yourself, believe me, the guy will be more interested in spending time with you.
Be yourself
Another important point - always be yourself and show him who you really are. If you are yourself, it will be much easier for a guy to communicate with you and get to know you as a person.
Try to push the boundaries of what is possible
Do you constantly feel shy when talking to guys? Then you just need to try to push the boundaries of the possible. Do something unusual, like asking him out for a walk or a date first. Trust me, guys love girls who know how to push the limits.
Don't limit yourself
Never limit yourself when communicating with a guy! Don't want to open up completely on the first date? Okay, then focus your attention on the things you want to tell him that he needs to know in order for him to like you.
Be confident in yourself
As you have already noticed, I repeat the same thing all the time - be confident in yourself! If you really want to learn how to stop being shy with guys, then you just need to learn to be confident. Wear clothes that make you feel confident, stop being nervous and go on a date.
Causes of androphobia
Why is a girl afraid of a man, where does the panic and rejection of males come from? Experts identify several main reasons that provoke the appearance and development of the disease:
- Actions of a violent nature on the part of persons of the opposite sex - husband, father or other relatives/friends. This can be physical harm, psychological violence;
The formation of incorrect attitudes under the influence of female society - growing up without a father/brother/grandfather in a family where women are afraid or have a negative attitude towards males;- Unsuccessful relationship with a man - especially the first experience;
- A negative first sexual experience leads to the thoughts “I’m afraid of sex with a man”;
- Watching films that focus on violence, cruelty and physical abuse from men;
- Constant monitoring of manifestations of male cruelty aimed at treating a child or other physically weak creature. Scandals or quarrels seen in childhood especially stand out.
The question of what to do if I am afraid of my husband overtakes many women - this problem is very common in modern society. Panic is a disease that you cannot cope with on your own. Androphobia should be treated by a specialist.
Treatment: how to stop being afraid of a man?
A woman who asks the question: “I’m afraid of relationships with men, what should I do?” – is already beginning to move towards recovery. Anyone who has accepted the presence of a problem can get rid of anxiety and build normal relationships, have a family and children.
Experts note that the disease (with the right approach) is steadily corrected and treatable - the main thing is the girl’s desire and careful work with a psychotherapist.
The following methods are used in the fight against androphobia:
- Group therapy - all problems are discussed out loud;
- Modeling behavior. The specialist and the patient rehearse behavior in possible situations;
- Hypnotherapy – obtaining positive attitudes on a subconscious level;
- Correction with medications.
To understand how to stop being afraid of men, you need to independently form positive thoughts and try to overcome barriers and start communicating with the opposite sex.
Interesting Facts
Finally, two interesting facts about fear of men:
- Recently, the term “social androphobia” has become widespread. The media creates the idea that men are insensitive creatures - this modern trend leads to a reduction in life expectancy and an increase in diseases among the male sex;
- Very often, unenlightened people confuse the concept of illness with feminism. It is worth understanding the basic differences between a socio-political movement and a pathological condition. Feminists do not oppose males, but only defend their freedoms and rights.
We talked about the symptoms and treatment of androphobia - if you are faced with a pathological condition and find signs in yourself or a loved one, we recommend that you urgently consult a specialist. Be careful and take care of your mental health!
Why are women afraid to build relationships with men?
Fear of relationships is inherent in representatives of both sexes, but women, due to their greater emotionality, suffer much more in case of failure. You cannot build a strong relationship if you do not trust your chosen one and are not ready to forget about all doubts.
You can fight the fear of relationships, but first you need to understand the reasons for its occurrence:
- Negative experience. Most often, a woman is afraid to build a new relationship if she already has a sad experience. If the past is replete with disappointments in the representatives of the stronger sex, then possible future chosen ones will be primarily wary. No woman wants to face the negative echoes of the past again. Betrayal, deception, broken hopes - you want to avoid all this in any possible way. The fear of negative experiences is sometimes so strong that women prefer to avoid romantic relationships for as long as possible.
- Fear of losing yourself. Any serious relationship requires both lovers to be willing to constantly work on themselves, fight their shortcomings and take care of their loved one. The needs and desires of the partner also play a big role; a person in love is ready to sacrifice his interests in order to please his chosen one. And this is precisely what another fear consists of – the fear of losing oneself. When you begin to live for the sake of your loved one and put other people’s desires above your own, sooner or later you can dissolve in him. Not all women will be happy about the idea of living in the shadow of their beloved man. Many representatives of the fair sex are very sensitive to their individual space and personal freedom, so they do not strive to build relationships. There is a strong fear of losing control over the situation.
- Diffidence. Not all women can boast of healthy self-esteem; many have unreasonable self-doubt. Any relationship requires maximum openness and constant work on yourself. But doubts about yourself and your attractiveness prevent you from fully enjoying life. You cannot protect yourself from failures in relationships, but you can change your attitude towards them. You should be prepared for the fact that you will have to be disappointed in men more than once before you meet the perfect one. But, unfortunately, any negative experience only makes a woman believe more strongly in her own inferiority, and she comes to the conclusion that it is better not to look for the man of her dreams at all, because then she will not be afraid of being left with a broken heart.
- Fear of responsibility. A relationship with a loved one is not only about romantic dinners and waking up together in the morning. A strong relationship, first of all, is a great responsibility, the presence of which each of the partners must realize. In a relationship, you have to put up with other people's imperfections, get used to other people's habits and struggle with your own shortcomings. Many women almost completely change their character in the hope of making the best impression on their chosen one. But this requires truly enormous effort and patience. Not every person is ready for such responsibility, because living only for yourself and realizing only your plans is much easier. Fear of responsibility in this case can serve as a serious reason for abandoning the relationship altogether.
- Fear of being rejected. One of the most common reasons for fear of relationships is the fear of rejection. Almost every woman has experienced unrequited love at least once in her life. If she decided to make a confession to a potential lover, and he refused or ridiculed her, then this could become a strong psychological trauma. Fear of rejection often leads to the creation of psychological barriers, expressed in loss of trust in other people and wariness.
