In this article, I intend to highlight in detail two seemingly opposite fears, which, nevertheless, are closely related to each other at a deep level. Firstly, this is the fear of going to the toilet.
and fear of toilets as such.
Secondly, there is the fear of not having a toilet
on the street or in a crowded place. This also includes various phobic subjects caused by poor bowel function and flatulence. Attention will also be paid to children's fears related to the toilet.
Fear of toilets
It’s generally not very pleasant to make your own fears public. But if admitting to fear of something really catastrophic is all right, then admitting to being afraid of toilets and going to the bathroom is considered completely inconvenient. It is for this reason that fears related to the toilet are not at the top of the official phobia ratings. In fact, people have much more such fears than is commonly believed, and they are much more widespread. And it is precisely this semi-humorous attitude towards everything related to urination and defecation that serves as the foundation on which the said phobias stand. Let's look at the underlying reasons for such a difficult attitude towards these simple functions of the body.
Sigmund Freud argued that there are three inexhaustible topics for humor - sex, defecation and politics. We won’t touch politics now, but we’ll dwell on the first two in more detail. Children very often and with pleasure discuss the topic of excrement and defecation. Why? First of all, because the anus is in close proximity to the genitals, and fixation on the process of defecation, which is understandable to a child, automatically draws attention to the not yet understandable, but instinctively attractive, area of the genitals. In the toilet, the child takes off clothes from places that are usually closed in everyday life, and also has the opportunity to touch the genitals, which causes pleasant sensations even long before puberty. In addition, exposure of intimate parts suggests the need for isolation from children of the other sex. Therefore, the toilet, toilet bowl and feces are interesting to the child not as such, but because of their associative connection with the genitals. An important fact: teenagers often masturbate in the toilet, which gives this room even more special meaning.
What makes us laugh? Only what is relevant and topical. Children's humor often involves feces. Teenage humor with the suddenly incredibly relevant topic of sex. The humor of a mature person plays out the complex conflicts of interpersonal relationships. But that very first children's laughter from incidents and carelessness associated with the toilet remains with us forever, although over time it sinks to the bottom of the unconscious. And, of course, the fear of being ridiculed in connection with the exercise of natural needs remains one of the oldest fears coming from childhood.
However, it may not all be limited to laughter. Parents and caregivers who do not have the proper patience sometimes act aggressively towards children who have problems with bowel movements or toilet cleanliness. And it turns out to be a vicious circle: the child pushes, but cannot empty his bowel movements, they shout at him, and this makes him squeeze even more. Evacuation does not happen “according to plan,” but it can happen at the most inopportune moment, causing a new storm of anger from the elders. This situation inevitably leads to toilet phobias.
Another source of fear of the toilet opens up in later life, and it is associated with the danger of contamination or infection. In some cases, the formation of a phobia occurs during adolescence, when the socially instilled shame of masturbation forces adolescents to consider everything associated with this process, including the toilet, “contaminated.” Sometimes the trigger for fear is a visit to a particularly dirty public toilet. In such cases, a specific fear of public toilets often develops.
Fear of not making it to the toilet
The second, seemingly opposite side of fears associated with the toilet, is the fear of not making it to the toilet. It can torment quite strongly, affecting not only internal states, but also the way of life. Personally, I know many people, especially women, who can go to the toilet several times in a row before leaving the house. Some of them tend to calculate the amount of liquid they drink, and even wait a little before leaving the house in the hope that part of the drink will be “absorbed” and left the body in the toilet at home. All such actions clearly fall into the category of phobia, although these people have no idea of turning to a psychologist.
It is no coincidence that the risk group for fear of not finding a toilet in time includes mainly women. During pregnancy, the bladder cannot stretch as much as it normally does, forcing pregnant women to constantly run to the toilet. Naturally, the prospect of frantically searching for a toilet in a public place, and even with a stomach, can frighten with very real consequences. The problem is that after giving birth, impressionable women retain memories of the inconvenience and continue to treat the problem of finding a toilet as if they were still pregnant. And the phobia does not necessarily occur immediately after childbirth. On the contrary, a breastfeeding child distracts from corresponding fears that may return years later. For example, as a consequence of severe stress.
The fear of running to the toilet is one of the newest phobias. It began to arise systematically among people no earlier than in the last fifty to seventy years, and even then only in large populated areas. In the Middle Ages and earlier, such a problem simply did not exist. Then people relieved themselves almost anywhere, with the exception of religious buildings, and they were absolutely not bothered by the presence of spectators. The process was considered completely natural and was not loaded with any additional meanings. In later eras, the morals of the upper classes became somewhat more complex, and the public exercise of natural needs by the nobles began to go out of fashion. But considering that the nobles in Russia made up less than one percent of the population, and in Europe about one and a half percent, the new traditions could not be considered widespread. And only recently, when concern with image has become a widespread phenomenon, has the fear of not finding a toilet turned into a full-fledged phobia.
This phobia is manifested by the previously mentioned measurements of the amount of liquid drunk, waiting for the drink to be “digested” and several consecutive visits to the toilet before leaving the house. Various drinks are also constantly being studied for their diuretic properties, routes are being developed along bushes and deserted areas, and the map of toilets is being carefully studied. In severe cases, there may be a dangerous reduction in fluid intake, trips from halfway back to the place where there is a toilet, and the refusal of some trips due to the possible problem of lack of a toilet. If you experience some of these symptoms, this is a good reason to consult a specialist.
Description and definition
Some experience great discomfort if there is a need to go to a public toilet where there are already people. In some cases, this is accompanied by severe stress and fear that someone will hear too “personal” sounds that accompany the process of emptying the bladder. This problem can be easily solved with the help of a good psychologist; in most cases, several sessions will be enough.
If a person suddenly has a fear of involuntary urination in some public place, for example, on a crowded street, in a movie theater, in transport, in a store, then we can assume that the poor fellow has acquired an unpleasant neurotic illness - urophobia. It makes the patient feel eternal panic and fear of being far from accessible toilets. Because of this, a person may return home several times in a row after going out on business, and traveling around the city or going to work seems like a real test for him with a growing sense of anxiety.
Urophobia is also called a simple fear of urination, if there is a specific reason for this, for example, an unpleasant disease like cystitis. Of course, this illness limits the patient and prevents him from living peacefully.
If you do not start treatment on time, you can doom yourself to long suffering, because the phobia will not just go away and will only get stronger and worsen over time.
Flatulence, intestines and fear
Another phobia indirectly related to the toilet is the fear of loud rumbling in the stomach and the fear of releasing intestinal gas in public. This phobia most often occurs in people who have digestive problems, and develops against a background that is by no means empty. But, as in the case of the fear of not making it to the toilet, such fears have become possible only recently, and only in the city. In rural areas, people are more accepting of such manifestations of physiology, partly because the communication distance is greater, and communication itself more often takes place on the street. In urban communication at close range and in enclosed spaces, the smell of intestinal gases can cause much greater inconvenience. It should also be noted that not all cultures treat such physiological acts in the same way. For example, in China, the sounds of an actively working intestine will not surprise anyone, like sneezing or coughing.
Sufferers of such phobias often starve themselves, avoiding food several hours before appearing in society. And since the life of the majority passes in society, the whole week turns into a continuous daytime hunger strike, followed by taking the entire daily dose of food for dinner. Naturally, this approach seriously harms the functioning of the digestive system, ultimately increasing flatulence. The only reasonable measure in this case is to go to a gastroenterologist and then follow all his recommendations. As a half measure, it may be advisable to avoid eating apples and raw cabbage before leaving the house. In special cases, you can take a larger dose of activated carbon - from one to two grams.
Symptoms and consequences
If a person does not know how to control outbursts of emotions, then you will notice drastic changes in his facial expressions. First of all, the cheerful, light mood will be replaced by isolation and seriousness. If an adult manages to maintain aggression, the child may become uncontrollable.
Cognitivism and behavior
People with ablutophobia experience extreme irritation when moisture gets on their skin. They are fixated on the discomfort they receive and avoid contact with water in every possible way:
- they run home if it rains outside;
- move away from the fountain a couple of meters;
- refuse to go to the pool...
They don’t drink pure water; they prefer to dilute it with tea, milk, or buy drinks.
An ablutophobe who knows how to control the fear of washing does not fill the bath to the top, washes quickly and wipes himself dry. The slightest drops of water lead to anxiety, make you itch, and experience neurosis.
Physiology
The main symptom of ablutophobia is fear. Depending on the type of temperament, fear of a bath or shower includes a complex of neurotic attacks:
- Frequent heartbeat;
- Trembling hands and feet;
- Confused, constrained breathing;
- Sweating;
- Dry mouth;
- Swallowing;
- Change of facial color to pale pink;
- Drop in voice tone.
Mental symptoms of introverts - phlegmatic and melancholic:
- Fainting;
- Dizziness;
- Stupor;
- Closedness.
Mental symptoms of extroverts - sanguine and choleric:
- Hysteria: crying, screaming;
- Uncontrolled behavior;
- Fainting;
- Active resistance.
Among the crowd, it is not difficult to find a person with ablutophobia. First of all, he is distinguished by his careless appearance, dirty clothes, poorly groomed hair... If you invite him to wash, visit the sauna or go to the beach, he will sharply refuse.
Consequences
Fear of the bath, in addition to diseases of the stomach, intestines or skin, can have a bad effect on communication with others. The fact is that, for example, teenagers of the same age with striking differences are overwhelming and exhausting. As a result of ridicule from peers, problems with socialization are added to ablutophobia.
As a rule, withdrawn teenagers require transition to home schooling in order to move away from an aggressive environment. As a result, the fear of washing develops a fear of social evaluation (social phobia).
If you do not see the problem in time and do not start treating ablutophobia, then the risk of developing new phobias remains high. As a result of the formation of additional phobias, a person will begin to look for means that entail an emotional decline.
Perhaps the ablutophobe will start taking medications at first. But dependence on them often leads to an increase in prescribed doses, so the risk of switching to alcohol or illicit substances is real.
Why do you want to go to the toilet out of fear?
Many people know the acute desire to defecate when there is strong fear. This is evidenced by well-established popular expressions that point to defecation as an indicator of the strength of fear. Let me briefly note that there is no specific mechanism that enhances intestinal function in times of danger. We can also say with confidence that the body does not receive any benefit. It’s just that in stressful situations, all muscles become toned, including the intestinal muscles. The structure of the nervous system in some people is such that stimulation of the intestines may be unreasonably excessive. So this reaction can be considered as a side reaction. You can read more about this in the article The Brain and Fear.
Child's fear of toilet
A child’s fear of the toilet is entirely the fault of inept and unrestrained adults. We all once did not know how to do many things, the implementation of which we now practically do not notice. Even something as natural as walking required strenuous and dramatic training at one time. But the need to move on two legs is obvious due to the advantages received, as well as due to the example set by others. With the toilet, everything is exactly the opposite. Firstly, the advantages of emptying into a potty are far from obvious, and on the contrary, there is a clear complication of the simplest process that occurs automatically. Secondly, the people around us for the most part do not set any obvious example. But even if a child can sometimes watch his mother in the toilet, she sits on the toilet, and not on the potty.
The purpose of this article is not to study techniques for potty training a child; this information is more than available. Now it is much more important to understand that to implement all these techniques you need to stock up on enormous patience, and in no case try to speed up the process. Especially by expressing dissatisfaction, shouting and punishment. Urination and defecation are intimate processes; they can occur naturally and unhindered only against the background of a calm state of mind. Parents' dissatisfaction leads to an increase in the tone of the child's sphincters, which will certainly lead to the opposite of the desired result. If the situation repeats regularly, this can not only cause late potty training, but also cause serious problems in adulthood.
How to overcome the fear of going to the toilet
Of course, to fully get rid of any phobia, the help of a psychologist is desirable. But in mild cases, you can help yourself on your own. The main thing to remember is that you should not try to overcome fears, especially those related to body functions, head-on. Such attempts often end in worsening the condition. The key to getting rid of any fear is comfort and pleasant sensations. Therefore, the toilet of a person who wants to get rid of corresponding fears must be something more than an ordinary toilet. If the home is cold, then the toilet should be warm. It should smell good, and a comfortable seat and soft light should be conducive to reading. There should be an interesting book in the toilet that can only be read there. Don’t be embarrassed at home - you can be in the toilet with a tablet, laptop, and even set up a music center there if you wish. The main thing is maximum comfort.
The second principle of getting rid of ingrained fear: long-term consolidation of a new reaction. You should not focus on quick results; the feeling of security and comfort should be consolidated. And only when the problem can be considered solved at home, you can begin to solve it in public toilets. Of course, you can’t take a stereo into a public toilet. But it’s great to go to a clean, queue-free restroom in a shopping center, where no one will disturb you, and sit comfortably there while reading or listening to your favorite music on headphones. Of course, the technique described above is just a small part of the technique, which is developed for each case separately. And sitting comfortably on the toilet alone will not overcome fears that are deeply rooted in the unconscious.
Causes
Fear of urinating in a public place is quite common among schoolchildren and students. In especially tense situations - during lectures from a strict teacher or during tests and exams - it is not always possible to go to the toilet, especially if you need to stay in it for a long time.
In this case, the stress from solving problems or a hostile attitude towards the teacher is often superimposed by the fear of wanting to empty the bladder in an inappropriate situation and not being able to satisfy the natural need in a short time. This significantly aggravates the mental state and the situation as a whole, which is why even a healthy person can develop urophobia.
The fear of the desire to go to the toilet in an inappropriate environment can also occur in an adult. Shy and timid individuals can easily turn into urophobes by visiting unfamiliar places or finding themselves in an unusual environment. For example, a trip to another city can contribute to the manifestation of this disease. Ignorance of the location of public toilets will cause a panic attack when you have the urge to urinate, and embarrassment to clarify information from strangers will further aggravate the situation.
Young people often encounter a similar problem in quite ordinary situations, in which the guys have been more than once before. The most striking example is going with friends to a club or bar, where the queue for the toilet is usually quite long, and the bladder is full after drinking alcoholic beverages. In this case, a person may fall into a completely unexpected state of panic, fearing that he will find himself in a shameful situation due to the current circumstances.
To avoid shame and not suffer from dizziness and stress in public (these are classic manifestations of panic attacks), urophobes begin to consciously avoid repeating a similar situation . They refuse to travel by bus to avoid traffic jams, stop visiting crowded places, and leave work and educational institutions. In this way, patients try to protect themselves from unnecessary suffering, but at the same time deprive themselves of a full life.
Some people, who are not ready to constantly be within four walls, begin to look for ways to calm down and solve the problem of unexpected urination. For example, they always carry with them special bags designed to quickly satisfy natural needs. Someone turns to a urologist because they attribute their condition to the appearance of some diseases of the genitourinary system. But usually doctors just shrug their shoulders, saying that the patient’s health is fine and the problem is not at all in the internal organs.
