Fear of migrants, difficulties with the word “black” and other questions about everyday racism

Our differences from each other are part of life. And, whether we like it or not, there is no escape from it. What makes us different from each other characterizes our personality and, in essence, is our uniqueness. We are different, we have different financial status, hobbies, political views, tastes and preferences. However, despite all the differences, we also have something in common. For example, the society in which you and I live, and humanity.

When fear or contempt for others arises, discrimination and intolerance appear (you will learn more about discrimination and its types in the article “Problematic relationships: harassment, abuse and bullying. What to do about it?”). Or you can also call it lack of tolerance. What is tolerance and what can be done to increase it, you will find out below.

Tolerance and its downside

We are attracted to people who are similar to us, with whom we have something in common. This could be eye color, hair color, haircut, interests, clothing style and much more. And with those whose differences are more noticeable, we keep our distance. This is how our brain is programmed. We recognize “us” or “stranger” by the signs that we managed to catch. And all this happens on a subconscious level. And when the “stranger” instinct has more power over common sense, disrespect or even aggression towards another person begins to appear.

So tolerance means tolerance towards other people, their character, appearance, lifestyle, opinion, choice, etc. Simply put, it is when you allow another person to be unique or express themselves without hindrance. For example, you love pizza and french fries, and your friend is a supporter of healthy eating. And you are calm about his choice, just as he is about yours. And if your friend criticized, condemned your choice and vehemently argued that pizza is harmful, then this would already be a manifestation of intolerance. And it turns out that showing tolerance means allowing for what already exists and accepting this “is” as a given, without interfering in the choice of another person, no matter what it concerns. Be it faith, religion or love.

To be intolerant, on the contrary, means to show your indignation and intolerance towards what you do not agree with. Plus the desire to harm or otherwise hinder the object of your indignation.

Why is tolerance needed?

During mass migration of peoples, terrorist attacks, and sex scandals, our love for humanity is constantly tested to the limit. Difficulties arise not only between people, but also between entire communities. The situation is complicated by the fact that many do not understand where the limits of tolerance are. It’s one thing to respect followers of another religion, but another thing to give up your usual clothes so as not to offend someone. And this is not fiction. One UK school has banned girls from wearing school skirts to avoid offending transgender children with differences in clothing.

But philosophers and psychologists agree on one thing: tolerance helps us to accept with dignity what we cannot change . And at the same time get all the possible benefits. The idea of ​​tolerance is also about accepting the diversity of the world as an inevitable fact. To ensure that the ideas of tolerance are learned from childhood, tolerance classes are held in schools. Adults have to educate themselves on their own.

If cultivating tolerance in yourself is too difficult, it is worth delving deeper into the reasons for antipathy towards other people. Perhaps the reason for this is childhood psychotrauma or outdated views on life that are time to change. After all, the world around us is constantly changing. But it’s one thing to know how scientists describe tolerance, and quite another to know your motivation:

1. If you treat yourself with a dose of healthy self-criticism, then you will find a reasonable explanation for the beliefs of other people.
2. If you notice only weaknesses in others, but note only strengths in yourself, your loved one, it is very difficult for you to come to terms with someone else’s “otherness.”
3. If you are confident in yourself and take responsibility for your actions, then you will be able to come to an agreement with any opponent with great success. Unlike an insecure person who sees a hidden threat in everything.
4. If you have a healthy sense of humor and are able to ironize your own actions, you will probably be tolerant of others. In contrast to a person for whom even an innocent joke causes offense.
5. If you can listen without judging and are willing to share your opinions, you have healthy self-esteem. Unlike a person who does not hold back his irritation or harbors a grudge.

The opposite concept of tolerance is intolerance. Intolerance is an excellent reason to abdicate responsibility for your life. After all, all failures can be blamed on representatives of other nationalities, minorities or anyone else. Intolerance deprives us of the opportunity to agree with other people and come to a compromise. And this quality makes it very difficult for us to build strong relationships.

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What does lack of tolerance lead to?

Tolerance involves respecting and understanding that other people's lives may be different from our own, just like their opinions, personality traits and appearance. We may have different opinions, beliefs, and disagree with what they think is right. And despite this, we want to be accepted, valued and respected in the same way.

Denial, disapproval and other manifestations of discrimination, for example, based on nationality, gender and political views lead first to conflicts and then to larger unrest, chaos and even massacres.

Lack of tolerance breeds hatred. Hatred leads to mistrust. Mistrust breeds fragmentation. Tolerance allows people of different backgrounds, religions and beliefs to work and live together, and this promotes greater efficiency and creates unity. Where there is discrimination, there can be no peace. Lack of tolerance leads to conflict, violence and instability [What can tolerance do for a nation?]

How to develop tolerance?

If people can't stand each other, they become angry and frustrated. In a society filled with hatred, a person begins to feel constrained and is more susceptible to depression. Discrimination makes life miserable not only for those who are subjected to it, but also for all members of society. The ability to accept each other's differences can have a positive impact on a person's well-being. Tolerance removes barriers and allows you to think more broadly. Tolerance also leads to a reduction in stress and promotes the development of empathy.

Here are some tips to help you become more tolerant:

• Remind yourself that you are safe [8 Tips to Build Tolerance in Your Life]. If other people think differently and their opinion is different from yours, this does not mean that you are wrong. Just like the fact that you simply need to defend your beliefs, otherwise you will be attacked. You have nothing to fear.
• Speak for yourself. Try to express your thoughts more accurately and on your own behalf. For example, “I disagree that..., I have a different opinion...” You should not engage the person in an offensive debate: “You are stupid if you think that!” and so on.
• Avoid insults and personalization (this is precisely about intolerance). Try to learn more to understand another point of view. Ask for more details and explain that you would like to understand how the other person came to this opinion.
• Be calm. Don't swear, curse or shout. This can significantly escalate the situation and turn it into a real conflict.
• Look for common ground [HOW TO BECOME MORE TOLERANT]. If at first glance you cannot find anything in common, especially if you are annoyed by the person and you dislike him, put off hasty conclusions about him. Try to discern even the most minimal similarity between you. Perhaps you like the same music, books, or prefer similar movies. There are always points of contact. If they are not visible, this does not mean that they are not there. Remember this.

And one more very important tip:

• Watch your reactions. Our eyes, facial expressions and gestures tell the truth. Body language is the same way of communication. For example, when you feel contempt, you sigh and roll your eyes. Such reactions indicate intolerance and reveal your train of thought. In this case, it becomes obvious that you believe that the other person's opinion is completely useless, and as if you are saying that you are better than him.

Nothing can be achieved without additional effort, including tolerance. Yes, sometimes it is difficult to understand some people, cultures and completely different points of view. But such diversity helps us look at the world more broadly and see that the truth usually lies somewhere “in the middle.”

The problem of tolerance in modern society

Parent meeting

THE PROBLEM OF TOLERANCE IN MODERN SOCIETY

“If I’m not like you, then I’m not insulting you, but giving you a gift.”

Antoine Saint - Exupery.

We have been living in the 21st century for several years now. Progress, economics, new computer systems - everything is at the service of man. It would seem that life should be more measured, more confident, more joyful. But, however, in modern society there is an active growth of aggressiveness, extremism, and conflicts. Why? Is society tolerant or not? What problems of tolerance exist in modern society?

Tolerance has always been considered a human virtue. It meant tolerance for differences among people, the ability to live without disturbing others, the ability to have rights and freedoms without violating the rights and freedoms of others. Tolerance is also the basis of democracy and human rights; intolerance in society leads to violation of human rights, violence and armed conflicts.

The intolerance of a society is a component of the intolerance of its citizens. Bigotry, stereotyping, racial slurs or jokes are specific examples of expressions of intolerance that occur in the lives of some people every day. Intolerance only leads to counter intolerance. She forces her victims to seek forms of revenge. In order to combat intolerance, individuals must recognize the connection between their behavior and the vicious circle of mistrust and violence in society. Each of us must ask ourselves: Am I tolerant? Do I label people? Am I rejecting those who are not like me? Do I blame them for my troubles?

In order to understand the essence, level and features of the manifestation of tolerance in modern Russian society, it is necessary, first of all, to clearly define the meaning of the term “tolerance” itself.

Tolerance is interpreted as “...a quality that characterizes the attitude towards another person as an equally worthy person and is expressed in the conscious suppression of feelings of rejection caused by everything that signifies something different in another (appearance, manner of speech, tastes, lifestyle, beliefs). Tolerance presupposes an attitude towards understanding and dialogue with others, recognition and respect for their rights to be different.”

“Tolerance is tolerance for someone else’s way of life, behavior, customs, feelings, opinions, ideas, beliefs.”

Thus, the main meaning of tolerance is tolerance for the “alien”, “different”. This quality is inherent in both an individual and a specific team, a particular social group, and society as a whole.

When considering the problem of tolerance, two important remarks should be made immediately. Firstly, “alien”, “other” does not mean ideas, behavior, actions, rituals that inevitably lead to degradation, to the destruction of the social and spiritual. The obvious problem in this case is that in practice their catastrophic, negative value is not always immediately and unambiguously revealed. Hence the difficulties in assessing these ideas, and, accordingly, personal social difficulties in forming a certain attitude towards them. On the other hand, we should not forget that it is a tolerant attitude, devoid of the desire to immediately prohibit or stigmatize, that allows us to identify the true essence of the “other.” Another remark follows from this. Tolerance does not necessarily imply refusal from criticism, from discussion, and especially from one’s own beliefs.

Currently, the problem of developing tolerance is particularly acute. This is explained by a number of reasons: the sharp stratification of world civilization along economic, social and other characteristics and the associated increase in intolerance; development of religious extremism; aggravation of interethnic relations caused by local wars; refugee problems.

As the domestic philosopher Yu.A. Schrader noted: “The most terrible of the catastrophes that threaten us is not only atomic, thermal and similar options for the physical destruction of humanity on Earth, but also anthropological - the destruction of human society in man.”

Conditions are necessary for the ideas of tolerance to germinate, but seeds sown in time will certainly sprout. It is important to “sow” consciously and purposefully, and then we won’t have to “drag the grass out of the ground,” and when spring comes and the sun warms up, it will grow on its own. Moreover, it is important to look at them from the perspective of a systems approach, revealing the interdependence and mutual influence of systems at different levels.

Basic principles of tolerance:

1) rejection of violence as an unacceptable means of introducing a person to any idea;

2) voluntary choice, emphasis on the sincerity of his convictions, “freedom of conscience.” Just as in Christianity “preaching and example” are ways of proselytizing, the idea of ​​tolerance can become a kind of guideline, a kind of flag of a movement that unites like-minded people. At the same time, one should not condemn or blame those who are not yet “enlightened”;

3) the ability to force oneself without forcing others. Fear and coercion from the outside do not generally contribute to restraint and tolerance, although as an educational factor at a certain point it disciplines people, while forming certain morals;

4) obedience to laws, traditions and customs, without violating them and satisfying social needs. Submission to laws, and not to the will of the ruler or the majority, seems to be an important factor in development and movement in the right direction;

5) acceptance of the Other, who may differ in various ways - national, racial, cultural, religious, etc. Everyone’s tolerance contributes to the balance of the integrity of society, the disclosure of the fullness of its parts and the achievement of the “golden mean” based on the golden rule of morality.

So, at present it is of great importance to realize the importance of the phenomenon of tolerance for our society. The problem of education of tolerance should unite different people, first of all, specialists of different directions and levels - psychologists, teachers, educators, managers, leaders and ordinary specialists, as well as representatives of different age groups.

One of the principles of tolerance is “the ability to force oneself without forcing others,” which does not imply coercion or violence, but only voluntary, conscious self-restraint. One can’t help but think of a parable about a sage, to whom a mother brought her son with a sweet tooth and asked him to convince him not to eat sweets. The sage ordered them to come in a month. “Don’t eat sweets,” said the sage, turning to the boy. “Why didn’t you say this right away, why did you make me wait a whole month?” — the woman was indignant. And then the sage admitted that he could not do this because at that time he himself was eating sweets. This is precisely an example of tolerance, self-restraint, which requires starting with yourself personally. I think that the ability to attract others to a position of tolerance through one’s own behavior and example is initially necessary and very important for the development of tolerance.

PARENT MEETING

06/03/2011

Agenda

1. Prevention of road safety.

Traffic police inspector S.G. Ulanova

1. The problem of tolerance in society.

Social teacher Lityagina I.V.

1. Summing up the results of the 2010 – 2011 academic year.

Deputy Director for Management and PR Shkuratova N.A.

1. Distribution of a memo for parents about the Law of the Moscow Region No. 176 of December 24, 2010. “On the protection of minors from the threat of alcohol dependence and the prevention of alcoholism among minors in the Moscow Region”

Social teacher Lityagina I.V.

1. Miscellaneous.

PROTOCOL

1. On the first question, we heard a speech from traffic police inspector S.G. Ulanova, who reminded those present of the rules for using scooters and motorcycles: the age from which you can ride these vehicles; Traffic rules must be known to all road users. She spoke about the situation with road traffic injuries in the Serpukhov region. Answered parents' questions.
2. On the second question, social teacher I.V. Lityagina was heard. (report attached).
3. On the third question, the deputy was heard. director for educational resources N.A. Shkuratova, who informed parents about the end of the 2010-2011 school year. 3rd year students passed their exams in March, are now undergoing practical training and are preparing to defend their thesis. 2nd year students take exams in general education subjects. Next, they will undergo practical training. 1st year students continue theoretical studies, and from June 10 they will begin practical training. For the majority of 1st and 2nd year students, industrial practice will take place in the school’s workshops, but if it is possible to arrange a student for industrial practice, this can be done by drawing up a contract and bringing it to the school. June 28th graduation party. Summer holidays for 1st and 2nd year students are from July 1 to August 31.
4. On the fourth issue, social teacher I.V. Lityagina was heard, who reminded parents of the contents of the Law of the Moscow Region No. 176 of December 24, 2010. “On the protection of minors from the threat of alcohol dependence and the prevention of alcoholism among minors in the Moscow Region.” I distributed leaflets for parents to those present, which contained extracts from the above-mentioned law.
5. We heard social teacher I.V. Lityagina, who told parents that students would be involved in repair work (plastering, painting) and school improvement work (washing windows, floors, decorating flower beds). The parents did not object to this. All those present agreed to involve students in these types of work.