Electra complex: what is it? What myth gave its name to the Electra complex? Signs of the Electra complex, reasons for its appearance, consequences. How to get rid of the Electra complex: tips, recommendations

What is the Oedipus complex

From the point of view of modern psychoanalysis, unlike the aforementioned King Oedipus, ordinary people for the most part do not kill their parents of the same sex, but experience for them a kind of double feeling of hatred and affection at the same time, which also makes them suffer and doubt their spiritual impulses.

Jealous and afraid. Strive to be like him and at the same time eliminate his opponent. At the same time, consciously or unconsciously, a stable sexual attraction is manifested towards the parent of the opposite sex, again leading to various mental disorders in adult men and women.

The danger of this disease is clearly visible due to its initial deviation from the norm.

If in childhood this craving for one parent and hatred for the other manifested itself as an unconscious state of the psyche, then adults are well aware that they experience sexual attraction to their own mother or father, and again hate one of their parents. Which leads to even greater dissonance and mental anguish.

Three states of the complex

The Oedipus complex can manifest itself in different directions: it is a hostile attitude towards representatives of one’s own, the opposite, or all sexes. As a result of this analysis, Freud identified three main conditions. It is proposed to consider them using the example of a male child:

Positive. This is a complex in which a child is attracted to the opposite sex, but shows a hostile attitude towards his own (the boy strives for his mother and does not love his father).
Negative. The child gravitates towards a representative of his own sex, but has a negative attitude towards the opposite (the boy is friendly with his father, but does not respect his mother).
Complete. The kid is aggressive towards representatives of both sexes (the boy is jealous and hates both of his parents).

Freud's Oedipus complex

Building his theory of psychoanalysis, Sigmund Freud was increasingly inclined to believe that not only sexuality in general, but also the entire development of human consciousness, mental processes, and all existing neuroses and disorders are based on the Oedipus complex.

The Oedipus complex occurs in both boys and adult men.

According to Freud's theory, the Oedipus complex comprehensively penetrates a person's self-consciousness and psyche, since almost from birth every child has an inextricable connection with his mother. By the age of three, when the phase of sexual determination begins, the Oedipus complex becomes more pronounced.

The child begins to quite consciously express his feelings towards his mother or father. Both love and jealousy, hatred, and anger fall upon parents in a stormy stream of emotions, striking them with nervousness and harshness in the child’s behavior. The Oedipus complex in adult men is characterized by an unusually strong sexually charged desire for one’s own mother and hostility towards one’s father.

Freud believed that the successful development of this complex would necessarily become a key point in determining the psychological state of a person. What is considered a “successful” or “positive” development of the Oedipus complex? There is “positive development” and there is “negative” development. Sigmund Freud made it a rule that there was a certain axis along which many sets of signs of the complex stretched.

From positive to negative value. From the manifestation of a pronounced attraction to a parent of the same sex, an ambivalent or definitely negative attitude towards a parent of the opposite sex, to sexual claims towards a parent of the opposite sex and intense hatred towards a parent of the opposite sex.

At the same time, against the background of worries about manifested feelings, the child gradually develops neurotic disorders associated with fear of punishment, a feeling of uselessness, inferiority, and detection of developmental deviations.

The founder of psychoanalysis was of the opinion that the Oedipus complex underlies the entire development of humanity, religious preferences, moral principles, moral qualities, the development of art and physiological well-being. That is, signs of the presence of the Oedipus complex underlie all aspects of the development of human civilization.

As a result, every adult man or woman is influenced by fears and stereotypes, drawing them from childhood attachments and hostile manifestations. Outside the circle of supporters of psychoanalysis, the fact of the comprehensive penetration of the Oedipus complex into the development of mankind is not accepted so confidently, since there is no direct evidence of the scientific nature of this theory.

Moreover, Freud's theory is very often subject to critical revision and correction.

At different times, such specialists as expressed their criticisms and made amendments to his theory:

Carl Gutsav Jung is a Swiss psychiatrist and teacher, the founder of the theory of depth psychology.
Alfred Adler - Austrian psychoanalyst and philosopher, founder of the system of individual psychology.
Erich Fromm is a German scientist, one of the founders of neo-Freudianism.
Melanie Klein - British psychoanalyst, creator of the theory of child psychoanalysis.
Otto Rank is an Austrian follower of Freudian theory.
Karen Horney is an American representative of the neo-Freudian branch of psychoanalysis.

As well as many other specialists in the field of psychology, psychiatry and psychoanalysis.

Freud on the complex

According to Freud, it should be considered one of the basic concepts of psychoanalysis. It is based on the child's ambivalence towards his own parents. This is a manifestation of attraction in children, which is accompanied by love and hatred at the same time towards their parents.

The first mention of this appeared in letters from a doctor to his colleague V. Fliess. Freud explored the Oedipus complex on the basis of self-analysis. He managed to remember his own mixed feelings of love for his mother and her jealousy for his father. According to Freud, the Oedipus complex is called so because he compared his feelings with the feelings of the hero of the ancient myth - King Oedipus, who killed his own father, who prevented him from getting closer to his mother.

Sigmund Freud emphasized that such a feeling is inherent in every child. He also added that normally all children's first sexual desires should be directed towards the mother, while the first violent desire should be directed towards the father (in the case of boys).

Sigmund Freud determined that such pathology can consist of three forms: positive, negative, passive.

The positive form is observed when a boy is sexually attracted to his mother, and he is jealous of her father, whom he hates.
The negative form manifests itself in the form of a boy's love for his father and his own mother's hostility.
There is also a passive form (attraction to both parents), which suggests that already mature adults will be bisexual in the future.

Differences between women and men

The Oedipus complex in adult men deforms his moral attitudes, as well as his religious beliefs, because in the process of personality formation, hiding his sexual attachment to his mother, the boy acquires a strong desire to identify himself with his father. Thus justifying sexual claims towards his own mother.

Based on the classic postulate of psychoanalysis, when boys feel sexually attracted to their mother, they may become jealous or even hate their father.

They perceive the mother’s entry into intimacy with the father as a clear fact of betrayal and betrayal. A child who hides his feelings for fear of punishment from his father hates his father more and more and acquires a special set of signs of his super-ego.

For girls, there are two concepts of the Oedipus complex:

Initially, according to the theory of psychoanalysis, the Oedipus complex in girls develops in a different way, less complex and burdened with various fears. The female super-ego may remain less developed, leaving the situation with its dissatisfaction and uncertainty to last as long as desired, but it contributes to the steady growth of the oppressive inferiority complex, exacerbating the feeling of one’s imperfection.
Later, a separate concept of this complex for women was identified - the complex of Electra, the heroine of the ancient Greek epic, who found a way to take revenge on her mother for the betrayal and murder of her father.

Based on Freud's theory, a girl develops penis envy from her love for her father. Resentment towards the mother becomes the main reason for the persistent attraction to the father, as a result of which the desire to have a child from her father becomes the predominant factor in the behavior and aspirations of the girl.

Electra complex: the myth that gives the phenomenon its name

Myths are a treasure not only for linguists and historians, but also for psychologists. So, for example, many have heard about the so-called “Oedipus complex” . That is, about the unhealthy attachment of boys to their mothers.

IMPORTANT: The Electra complex is a kind of mirror image of the Oedipus complex. That is, a condition in which girls are too attached to their fathers and dislike their mothers.

How did this terminology come about? The source was a myth that featured the king of Hellas Agamemnon , his wife Clytemnestra , son Orestes and daughter Electra. The latter, by the way, was the tsar’s favorite child - “daddy’s daughter,” as they say now.

Sculpture depicting Electra

It would seem that this is family happiness. But Clytemnestra got a man, Aegisthus . And, accordingly, her husband became a hindrance for her. Klimnestra decided to solve her problem in a radical way: she killed her husband and sent her children out of sight. True, there is a version that Esgif killed Agamemnon, but the result is the same in any case.

Klymnestra celebrated the victory, but not for long. She did not take into account Electra's strong love for her father. The daughter decided to take revenge on her mother, enlisting the support of her brother. As a result, both Klymnestra and Aegisthus were killed.

Development time

Periods of development of the Oedipus complex:

Oral – the time from 0 to 1.5 years, when the child is closely connected with the mother. His mouth is his most basic tool for experiencing the world and experiencing pleasure. The primary object of pleasure during this period is the mother's breast. Breastfeeding time becomes an inevitable and very important ritual, during which the child receives maximum positive emotions.
The anal period is the time from 1.5 to 3 years when the child learns to defecate independently, while enjoying it. Not only from monitoring this process, but also from the encouragement of the child by the adults around him. Thus, he begins to realize his significance and the significance of his awareness. Self-control and self-awareness become a guide to a world where you can control your body.
The phallic period from 3 to 4 is another stage in the development of sexuality in a child. At this time, a person begins to recognize himself as an individual of a certain gender. Looking at the genitals, playing with them, comparing them with others is an integral part of the phallic period of personality development, which has as its main task the determination of gender.
Phallic-Oedipal period. Just at the age of 4-6 years, for the first time, a boy begins to desire his mother from a sexual point of view and be jealous of her father. As a representative of the female set of chromosomes, the girl discovers in herself envy of the owners of the penis, after some time expressing her love exclusively for her father, ignoring her mother.
The latent period is the age from 6 to 12 years, characterized by a temporary absence and extinction of sexual desires. The entire development of the child at this moment is aimed at communication, the educational process, and the establishment of a circle, in addition to sexual relationships.
Puberty begins at the age of 12-14 and is colored by a bright explosion of sexuality and the release of hormones. At this time, the Oedipus complex enters its final phase of development. The child moves into adolescence, and then into adulthood.

Sigmund Freud believed that people are born bisexual. At this time, due to the close one-sided relationship between the child and the mother, and due to the fact that the father’s role in caring for the child is quite insignificant, a non-stimulating period of development passes.

Then, around 2-3 years, the first manifestations of certain sexual preferences are observed. Then this process reaches peak values. In the period from 3 to 5 years, sexual awareness of oneself as a sexual object occurs. Then some manifestations of the Oedipus complex pass into the stage of a hidden, inhibited course, until the period of puberty at 12-14 years.

In childhood, the child only tries to push his parents away if they hug or kiss in front of him, and tries more to be close to the parent of the opposite sex. The boy, trying his best to be like his dad, offers his help to his mother, does not let her go a single step, trying to control her space, reserving the right to be near her.

The girl tries to look after her father, waits for him to return from work, brings her first drawings for his approval, or whispers her secrets in his ear. In adolescence, burdened by a surge of hormones and conflicting feelings, the Oedipus complex will cause constant hysterics and squabbles with a parent of the same sex.

Disobedience can escalate into an open, violent conflict. The teenager will speak unflatteringly about the aging parent, mock him, lash out with angry, accusatory speeches, mercilessly ridiculing his shortcomings. Thus, wanting to emphasize their wealth, attractiveness and competitiveness in the eyes of the parent of the opposite sex.

Primacy of the phallus and the castration complex

Educators, one way or another, emphasize the ban on everything related to the genitals, which only fuels the child’s interest in research in this area. According to Freud, the boy's story in this place is at odds with the girl's story.

“During this exploration, the boy comes to the discovery that the penis is not the common property of all creatures similar to it. The impetus for this is that the boy accidentally noticed what the genitals of his little sister or girlfriend looked like. Observant boys, based on their observations of girls urinating, seeing a different position and hearing a different noise, begin to suspect that there is something different here, and then try to repeat these observations in order to clarify the state of affairs. It is known how they react to this absence of a penis. They do not accept this deficiency, believe that they still see the organ, mask the contradiction between observation and their bias with the consideration that the organ is still small and will grow, and gradually come to the conclusion, important in an affective sense, that at least it was there

and then it
was taken away
.
The absence of a penis is understood as the result of castration, and the child is faced with the task of figuring out the relationship of castration
to himself.”
(“ Infantile genital organization
”)

The boy does not find the girl's penis is the same as his own, from which he concludes that the girl had it cut off. If they cut it off for a girl, they can cut it off for him too. This is how Freud explains the birth of castration anxiety

at the boy's.
All subsequent development of the boy, right up to the death of the Oedipus complex, according to Freud, will be accompanied by fear of castration
. But what about the girl, what is her attitude towards the differences in the structure of the genitals in comparison with the boy, according to Freud?

«Castration complex

in a girl it also arises due to the fact that she sees the genitals of another.
She immediately notices the difference... She feels deeply deprived, often makes it clear that she, too, would like to “have the same”, penis envy
, which leaves indelible marks in her development and character formation...” (“
Introduction to psychoanalysis
")

That is, according to Freud, the girl considers herself already castrated

, and all that remains for the girl is to envy the boy.
Penis envy
is a central concept in Freud's concept of
the castration complex
in girls.
This is due, according to Freud, to the fact that the existence of a vagina for a girl remains a mystery
due to its
peculiar anatomical location
.
This is a very important assumption on which all further construction of the concept of the Oedipus complex for girls
in classical psychoanalysis is based (which will be the subject of a special article in this series).
According to Freud, the girl finds the clitoris too small, which only fuels envy
of the boy's large penis.
The scrotum
for a boy, according to Freud, also does not matter, because...
he does not pay attention to her due to the fact that only the penis
gives special pleasure when touched.

According to Freud, only one organ is significant for both sexes - the penis

(phallus).
That is, the girl for Freud turned out to be just a “ castrated boy
.”

"The fundamental character of this infantile genital organization

is at the same time its difference from the final
genital organization of adults
.
It lies in the fact that for both sexes only one genitalia, the male,
.
There is not a primacy of the genitals, but a primacy of the phallus
" (“
Infantile genital organization
”)

Infantile genital organization

contains at its core
the primacy of the phallus
, both for boys and girls.
Thus, Freud introduces the concept of a castration complex
: for a boy it consists of the fear
of losing his penis
, and all that remains for a “castrated” girl is
envy of the penis
that the boy has.
This stage of psychosexual development (from three to five years), called phallic
, coincides with the culmination
of the Oedipus complex
.

Everything described above refers to the so-called direct

or
positive Oedipus complex
.

TOP

Causes of occurrence in men and boys

Hyperattention, spoiling, inadequate expression of tenderness, too active caresses in the genital area, causing a sexual response.
Significant lack of attention, merciless punishment, despotic attitude towards the boy on the part of his parents in the first years of his life.
Painful stress, a depressing atmosphere, purposeful actions of parents that help suppress the own impulses of a boy or a growing man.
The birth of another child, the emergence of a new object of increased attention from parents and people around the child.
Quarrels, conflicts between parents, developing into an appeal to the child for approval or protection.
Divorce, death of one of the parents, and as a result, the boy is raised only by his mother. An incomplete family can become too negative an experience in personal development due to its initial inferiority. An adult man, not receiving a positive example of family life, further relies only on his own skills based on living in a single-parent family.

How parents provoke the development of a complex

To varying degrees, all children go through the trials of the Oedipus complex. It is very important, especially in adolescence, to pay special attention to the child’s mental state. It is parents who can and should take the main steps to identify and overcome negative aspects in the boy’s development.

By punishing or encouraging a child, parents arouse in him an increasing desire to be like his father in order to deserve even more attention, praise, and support from his mother. It would be too unproductive to go down the path of only punishment and rewards. Showing coherence, attention and patience in raising a boy is what can help in overcoming any difficult situations.

By being touched or ignoring the child’s attempts to claim his rights to his mother, when he presents himself in the best light, trying to humiliate his father, it is impossible to achieve the correct behavior of the child.

It is necessary to persistently and patiently explain to him that competition between father and son is impossible. Each time, retreating before their son’s attempts to assert himself, the parents indulge his Oedipus complex, triggering the development of deviations that deform the psyche of a growing man.

What is the danger

Generally accepted moral principles ensure that a person’s thinking remains within clearly defined boundaries. Any deviation in psychological development is a transition beyond the boundaries of morality. The Oedipus complex is one of the most striking examples of such deviation from the norm. Its danger lies in its total penetration into the consciousness, and most importantly, into the subconscious of a person.

Most of its manifestations lie precisely in the subconscious area of thinking. The Oedipus complex in adult men, as well as in women, can result in either a constant search for a partner, if mental disorders develop in a positive direction.

These people are not able to accept love, just as they are not able to love, first of all, themselves. Their whole world narrows to suffering from unrequited love.

The Oedipus complex can lead to such undesirable deviations in the development of his sexuality as homosexual inclinations, lesbian manifestations, a tendency towards transvestism, bisexuality, an orientation towards related sexual relations - incest if he is predisposed to strive for a negative mark on the axis of his development.

There is another danger of the Oedipus complex - ambivalence. As a manifestation of duality of actions and emotions towards one of the parents, and subsequently, towards the same event, phenomenon, person, world.

In the first stages, this manifests itself in the inability to formulate one’s own opinion, constantly succumbing to fashion trends or generally accepted judgments, and to a greater extent, the opinion of one of the parents.

In the future, such a life position can lead to severe nervous and mental disorders. An adult man suffering from an Oedipus complex is completely dependent on what his mother said or thought. He cannot commit a single balanced independent act; he is simply not capable of ordinary actions that require taking responsibility.

Prevention of the Electra complex: advice for parents

The Electra complex is a phenomenon that cannot be ignored. Parents who turn a blind eye to the problem have a great risk of raising a girl who will never be able to become part of a happy relationship with a man.

The main thing that psychologists recommend starting with is to reconsider the situation in the family.

Mother needs to soften her temper

A tyrannical mother, trying to control everything and keep a tight rein on her daughter, will raise her to be diligent and correct. However, the price of this is damaged relationships and misunderstanding of each other’s motives.

Show more affection and attention

Daughters really need their mother's support. Mothers do not need to condemn every child’s mistake and try to impose their point of view. Every girl should have a desire for self-realization in a certain area. The mother's task is to support and not judge.

Paying attention is equal

Both parents should give the same amount of attention to their daughter. Even if a girl’s increased desire for her father was noted, he should not distance himself from her. The mother should also “penetrate” this reverent relationship. She should talk to her daughter more, tell her something interesting, answer questions.

Give up screaming and emotions

Read more: The best books on child psychology for parents

Electra adults, remembering their mother, speak of her as a nervous, hysterical woman, whose anger flared up over any wrongdoing. The mother’s task is to control emotions, explain herself gently, and never hit the child. Otherwise, the complex will only get worse.

Set boundaries

It is important for a father to make his daughter understand that he is not all-powerful and all-understanding. As soon as the girl sees that she is not getting everything she dreamed of from her relationship with her dad, she will begin to pay more attention to her mom. It is important for a mother not to miss her chance - she should listen to her daughter, help her solve a problem or sympathize with her failure.

At the moment of overcoming the complex, the husband and wife must unite as much as possible. It is in the interests of both to help the child get rid of the complex and begin to live a full life. The sooner she copes with the condition, the better.

Signs of the complex in adulthood

The Oedipus complex in adult men is expressed in the inability to refuse the care of the mother. Even when he finds a new family, a man cannot tear himself away from his mother’s skirt.
He is quite happy that his mother is still caring for him.
If you manage to marry him, then he will most often prefer to marry a woman older than himself. Similar to her mother, if not in appearance, then in her main character traits.
Once married, such a man will do everything to prevent the birth of children.
If a child is nevertheless born into the family, such men will be jealous of their wife for the child.
The wife of such a man will be constantly compared to his mother, and the mother will constantly monitor how and what is being done for her son.
Outwardly, an adult, strong, attractive, sexy man behaves more like a small child. With childhood grievances and attempts to prove something to someone. Most often this results in a fight against windmills, but at the same time demanding rewards as for a heroic act.
The most dangerous outcome of the case is incest. In exceptional cases, an act of sexual intimacy occurs between mother and son. The adult son, having turned into a man, fully aware of the immorality of his behavior, is satisfied with the feeling of victory, having received the most desired and forbidden, and takes, as it seems to him, his rightful place next to the woman whom he madly loves almost all his life. In this situation, first of all, the mother suffers, falling into the abyss of moral problems and remorse, reaching a dead end of confrontation between her own feelings and moral self-flagellation.

Sometimes psychoanalysts can advise, in cases where the situation has reached the point of incest, for a mother suffering from nervous shock to find a man or even create a new marriage, believing that the appearance of another man in the house will help cool the son’s passion for his mother.

It is difficult to say what guides these experts, but in real life such a situation can lead to even greater suffering. The son will no longer give up his place next to his mother. Even if she gets married.

And even if any man, or father, if incest occurred in a complete family, has intimate intimacy with a woman, the son will still find ways to remain alone with his mother. Through blackmail, reproaches, ultimatums or threats of suicide, he will force her to have sex. The son will definitely look for ways to get rid of his opponent, asserting himself next to his mother.

The woman is in a dependent position. There can only be one way out: you need to go to the doctor. Otherwise, a deadlock situation will lead to severe nervous disorders, depression, and in particularly difficult cases, suicide attempts.

General symptoms of the Oedipus complex in boys and girls

It is possible to identify almost identical signs of the complex that appear in boys and girls in relation to their mother:

Increased irritability. The baby’s nervousness is associated with constant psychological pressure that the child cannot cope with.
Moodiness. It is important for the baby that the attention of mom or dad is always focused on him, otherwise he refuses to perform any activity.
Difficulties with separation. For example, a son (or daughter) does not want to let his parents go to work, because he considers them his property and is not ready to part with them for a long time.
Refusal to communicate with peers. Instead of interacting with children of his own age, the baby chooses to play with his parents.

How to get rid of the Oedipus complex

Most of the problems associated with the development of the Oedipus complex can and should be solved in childhood. Having noticed only the first signs of emotional outbursts, parents can gently and persistently influence the situation.

First of all, you need to become a friend to your child. If at least one parent can have a confidential conversation with their child, this can already become the basis on which all work with a growing person will be built.

A person feels lonely at any age. And at any age, it is important to have a person next to you who can listen without invading personal space, adequately responding to important and already difficult confessions and revelations.

Every person needs to receive enough attention and care so as not to feel unnecessary and abandoned. It is the parents who must establish such an emotional climate in the family in which each family member feels like a necessary and equal partner in the relationship.

An important part in a person’s life is communication, in the family, with peers, with older people. At school, at work, among friends and like-minded people, as well as among competitors and opponents, a person needs to have communication skills and experience in any situation.

The absence of such an important component as the experience of searching and making decisions causes a chain stress reaction in a fragile body, leading to isolation and self-doubt. An adult, like a child, will seek protection under his mother’s or father’s wing.

This seemingly innocent circumstance, accumulating, deprives a person of the chance to get out of the current situation on his own. According to Freud's theory, the Oedipus complex is a common but temporary change in a person's mental state. The danger of its persistent manifestation is minimal and is possible only under aggravating circumstances.

Signs of the Oedipus complex in girls

After three years, a girl begins to identify herself with her mother, finding more and more similarities. As a result, the daughter and mother become one, the baby also considers the mother only her own, not allowing her to fully communicate with her husband: she cries, screams, attracts attention to herself, refuses to communicate with her father, and does not want to do anything in his presence.

Treatment

The office of a psychoanalyst or psychotherapist is the most suitable place to look for treatment methods. But most importantly, the owner of a set of manifestations of such a mental state must try with all his might to get out of this state.

Treatment of the Oedipus complex, which is perpetuated by stress and nervousness, is a long and complex process. The emotional connection between children and parents is the strongest, and it is impossible to break it. And pursuing precisely this goal is impossible even with the use of medications. There will be no positive dynamics.

In the treatment of the Oedipus complex in children, a clear example of correct family relationships and the presence of a healthy, independent, intelligent man nearby can be useful. When there is no clearly directed positive model of behavior, not only a father, but also a coach or teacher, an older brother or friend, a favorite actor or athlete can become a role model.

For adult men, treatment of the Oedipus complex results in a serious, continuous struggle with their superego. In this case, it is not at all easy to bring the super-ego out of the depths of the subconscious, to subordinate the instincts to total and comprehensive control. But as a result of this struggle, next to the mother there will be not a notorious, capricious child, but an adult, adequate, reliable man.