How often in our lives do we feel the need to somehow psychologically influence a person? No, here we are not talking about manipulating people at all, but about, for example, winning over your interlocutor, getting someone to like you, softening someone’s anger or calming them down, finding a common language with work colleagues or business partners and other similar things. things. We are sure that everyone has encountered something similar and will encounter it more than once.
In this article, we hasten to share with you interesting psychological tricks and techniques. Their main value is that they really work and help achieve the desired result. Some of them, of course, resemble manipulative techniques, so we advise you to use them only for good purposes, and not for uncontrolled control of other people.
Interesting psychological techniques
One more small addition to the introduction: knowing the psychological techniques that we will talk about, you can not only make your communication with people more effective, but also increase your level of psychological security, because many of the techniques given are often used by others in relation to you. All of them have already been tested in practice many times and have proven their effectiveness, which means you will benefit from them in a variety of situations. Let's get started.
Open non-verbal
To appear to others as a more confident, sincere and communicative person, use open postures and gestures. When communicating, people subconsciously perceive nonverbal communication signals, and knowing this, it is much easier to make an impression. Be relaxed, do not cross your arms and legs, shake hands with your palm slightly exposed, etc. You will find more gestures and postures in the article “Nonverbal means of communication.”
Reception "10 minutes"
This technique is useful to use in relation to yourself when there is no motivation to do some work. The brain often deceives a person, making him unwilling to do anything and making him lazy. Knowing this, you can easily switch from laziness and procrastination to activity. Tell yourself that you will only do something for 10 minutes. You will probably not even notice how you will get involved in your work and want to continue further.
Door-in-the-face technique
The essence of this technique with a slightly strange name is that if you need something from a person, first you ask for something more, and then lower your demands. It is based on one psychological subtlety: people are more often reluctant to agree to fulfill a request, and therefore they make concessions much faster if the request becomes less burdensome. So if you want to take a couple of days off, ask for two weeks off first.
Present
Gifts are always nice, people love to receive them, and even a small gift can have a big impact on a person. When you want to “appease” someone or try to change their attitude towards you, give this person a pleasant surprise, for example, give a small souvenir, a bouquet of flowers or a bottle of good wine.
Self confidence
People tend to believe that if a person is confident in himself, then he is a strong and authoritative person, a leader, someone who can be relied on, who can be trusted. Do you want people to take you seriously, respect and trust you? Always, everywhere and in everything, behave as if you know exactly what to do. Even if something goes wrong, people themselves will help you, completely unaware of your shortcomings or little experience in some matter.
Fear of loss
This psychological feature of people has long been used in advertising, management, sales, politics, business and other fields of activity. People never want to lose something. Therefore, if you want to add significance to some of your proposals, show it to the person in such a way that he feels the loss. By the way, don't forget about this trick when you go shopping or watch commercials on TV.
Passive voice
A very useful technique when you need to point out to someone their mistake. Considering that direct accusations always cause a negative reaction and a feeling of protest (or guilt) in people, it is much better to convey your opinion using the passive voice. For example, instead of “You didn’t turn in the project yesterday,” you say, “The project was never turned in.” Note that this technique greatly helps to avoid confrontation and easy conflicts.
We think it wouldn’t hurt to introduce you to a few conversation tricks. So let's take a break for five minutes and watch a video from a specialist in public speaking, public speaking, voice training and rhetoric, Natalia Makhno.
"Foot in the door" technique
The opposite technique to the Door in the Face technique. The point is that if you “train” someone to do small favors for you, you can count on the fact that this someone will help you with something very serious (a person gets used to helping, which is why he feels obligated later). Ask people for small favors and minor help more often, so that you can boldly ask for more. Also read our article “A Foot in the Door.”
The illusion of choice
When you want a person to do what you want, offer him the illusion that he can choose. In fact, in any case, he will do what you ask, thinking that he himself decided to do it. For example, if you want to meet someone tomorrow, ask, “Are you available at 2 p.m. or 7 p.m.?” More likely, the interlocutor will choose the time, but will not refuse. You can easily draw analogies with such a choice yourself.
Reception "Mirror"
Another technique based on non-verbal communication signals. The idea is that when communicating with a person, you quietly copy his gestures and postures in order to “tune in” with him, feel him more deeply, or win him over. But, on the other hand, you can use the technique of copying the qualities and traits of a person (confidence, wit, willpower, etc.) People often admire what they have in themselves, and it is much more pleasant for them to see a kindred spirit.
Silence
We all remember the not-so-pleasant feeling during awkward pauses in communication, and this feeling can be used to your advantage. The fact is that awkward silence has such a “special” effect on all interlocutors. And if you want to get to know someone better, understand their thoughts, or just “get” them to talk, just shut up. Such a pause will cause a feeling of awkwardness in the interlocutor, and he will involuntarily try to get rid of it by filling this pause.
Small services
And again we are talking about services. People by their nature want to be needed and in demand, involved in the life of another person or group. If you ask others for something, you let them know that you need them, and this really helps to build rapprochement and trust. Ask people to help you with something more often, and soon friendships will begin between you.
Appraising glance
This technique is useful when dealing with suspicious and negative people. When you catch the gaze of someone who is negative towards you (often this is felt non-verbally), look into his eyes for a couple of seconds. Then look at his feet and now again at his eyes. After this, look away. This “silent assessment” technique will demonstrate to the person that you have not recognized him as a threat, that is, you are not afraid of him. At the same time, it is advisable to behave confidently and maintain an even posture.
Admitting mistakes
When you yourself point out your mistakes and shortcomings, you grow in the eyes of others, and such a person can be forgiven a lot. If you want to create trusting relationships with other people, admit your mistakes, especially small and subtle ones. Also, sometimes you can take the blame for something you didn’t do, because... this also increases the trust of other people. But here you must always remember the possible consequences of other people's mistakes.
Agreement
When you need to find a compromise and a mutually beneficial solution, build communication on agreement, that is, on what unites you with other people. For example, if your points of view differ, say: “I agree with you, but...” or “Yes, I understand, although...”. This will help you quickly find a common language and clearly, without confrontation, convey your opposite position to your opponent.
Neutrality
A balanced approach contributes to more effective problem solving in all spheres of life. If you want a person to meet you halfway and begin to trust you, show him during communication that you are ready to listen to him and accept arguments and arguments. By maintaining an adequate and neutral position, you will demonstrate self-confidence and interest in your interlocutor.
Attention to detail
Many problems and controversial issues are resolved thanks to the competent structure of the discussion. When participating in negotiations, you should not dispute the main topic. Instead, you need to focus on secondary issues. For example, you need to rent an additional warehouse. Do not ask those present whether rent is needed, but immediately discuss how it will be paid for. In this case, renting a warehouse will be perceived as a necessity.
Handle bite
A good technique for changing your own condition. We are sure you know that when you smile, your body produces the hormone of joy – endorphin. If you are in a bad mood and nothing makes you happy, you can try to change it by biting your hand. By biting a pen, you make yourself smile artificially, as a result of which endorphins are again produced. After this action, your condition should improve at least a little.
Avoiding “but” and “however”
The words “but” and “however” are often perceived as refusal. Of course, you won’t be able to get rid of them completely, but it’s worth reducing their use unnecessarily. The less you use them, the less tense communication situations will arise. If you need to say something like “yes, but...”, it is better to replace it with “yes, and...”. You will see for yourself that people perceive the second phrase more positively than the first.
Listening skills
Competent listening is a valuable skill that not every person possesses. But it is precisely this that allows you to establish trust, make a good impression and understand people deeper. Therefore, even if you have the information, it is more advisable to let your interlocutor speak out, tell you how to do it right, and even teach. People love to talk, and the longer a person can talk in your presence, the more pleasure he will get from communicating with you.
"Yes, I remember" technique
This technique is suitable “against” people who strive to once again tell what they have already told dozens of times. If the interlocutor begins to tell his “crown” story again, do not interrupt him. Just say at a convenient moment: “yes, I remember,” and then continue the story with a few phrases. This way your interlocutor will understand that you shouldn’t repeat yourself, and you will be known as an attentive person who cares about other people’s words.
People's names
The phrase “A person’s most favorite sound is the sound of his name” has great meaning, because we all enjoy being called by name. Use your interlocutor's name in conversation as often as possible, and you will be surprised at how much he likes you. But still be guided by a sense of proportion, so as not to seem strange and not turn your counterpart against yourself.
These are the psychological techniques we wanted to tell you about. Remember them, use them and try to catch when someone uses them towards you. This way you will be able to recognize attempts to psychologically influence yourself, as well as expand the area of application of these techniques, because you will know how other people do it. However, we want to give some more useful tips and recommendations.
Additional psychological techniques
These techniques are also very easy to use in everyday life. And if you want, knowing about them, you can simply make interesting observations of people’s behavior. We won’t look at it in detail – we’ll just point out the essence:
- To calm down and relieve nervous tension, you can chew gum, because chewing movements remind the brain of eating, and eating is associated with safety and pleasure.
- If several people are laughing in a group, everyone will look at the one he likes best, or at the one he would like to treat as a close person.
- When you are not satisfied with the answer of the interlocutor, or you want to receive it in a more detailed form, do not ask or ask for anything. It is enough to look carefully into the eyes of your counterpart - he will intuitively understand that he needs to continue the conversation.
- If you remain completely calm when someone yells at you, you can make the other person feel guilty for yelling and being overly emotional.
- Just as emotions influence facial expressions, facial expressions influence emotions. To feel a dose of fun and happiness, put an artificial smile on your face. Very soon you will notice that it has become much easier to smile sincerely.
- When you have a job interview or interview, imagine that the interlocutor is your good old friend. As a result, you will communicate more freely, become more relaxed, and reduce your stress levels.
- By artificially expressing a little more joy at meeting someone, after a while you will feel that it has actually become much more pleasant for you to see them. In addition, the next time you meet, this person himself will be much more glad to see you.
- If you often work a lot with clients (and people in general), place a mirror somewhere behind you. People will express negativity less often and become more polite, because... no one likes to see themselves irritated and angry.
- When you meet someone, pay attention to the color of that person's eyes. This will create close eye contact, which in itself increases the sympathy of others.
- If you expect someone to criticize you in a meeting or meeting, sit next to that person. This will automatically make him softer, and the pressure of criticism will be much weaker than if you were at a distance from the person.
- People remember more often and better what happened at the beginning and end of the day, and everything between these “points” is remembered as blurry. This trick is useful to use when communicating with friends, during interviews, and when negotiating.
- You can learn something even better if you teach it to someone else. Once you have mastered a new skill, try to share this knowledge with others, and you will become much better at it.
- When interacting with people, pay attention to the position of their feet to learn what emotions they are feeling. For example, if, when approaching a person, you see that he turned around, but his feet remained in place, he is not inclined towards you. Feet pointing in your direction will indicate interest and attention. Feet “looking” to the sides symbolize openness. And feet brought together are a sign of discomfort.
- When you have to squeeze through a crowd of people, find gaps between them and look there. People will automatically give way to you because... will capture the trajectory of your movement.
- When expressing your thoughts, try not to say “it seems to me” or “I think.” This is already implied, but these phrases are often perceived by others as a sign of self-doubt.
- To make people like you more, strive to understand how they see themselves in their own eyes. Once you understand this, maintain this image in your communications so that people feel that you see them as they want to appear.
- If you are planning a date and want to get closer to your partner and experience unusual emotions, adrenaline will help you. You can fly on an airplane, ride horses, go river rafting or go to the movies to see a horror movie.
- If you have a date in a place where you can get positive emotions (a romantic park, a cozy retro-style restaurant, the seashore at sunset, etc.), you can be sure that pleasant impressions will always be associated with you in your partner’s mind.
- Physiologically, stress is often expressed in the same way as joyful excitement: increased heart rate, deep breathing, emotional intensity, etc. If you perceive stressful situations as if they are a challenge for you, the negative impact of stress will be significantly reduced.
- When you notice that someone is looking at you intently, just yawn - the person will immediately turn away. Firstly, no one likes to watch others yawn, and secondly, this person will most likely yawn himself, which will make him look away.
- In a situation where there is a conflict, quarrel or even a fight between two people, take something edible, stand between these people and start eating. The likelihood that you will be hit or that the conflict will escalate is very low. By the way, this trick is called the snackman effect.
- If you want to get rid of an item in your hands, start a conversation with another person and give the item to him. It is best to ask some question - this will “load” the interlocutor’s brain as much as possible, and he will accept the object from your hands at a reflex level.
- Do not let others in on your problems unnecessarily, because they are most concerned about their own. When choosing a topic for conversation, avoid issues that interest you personally and focus on what is interesting to others. By doing this, you will seem like a very attentive and interesting conversationalist.
- A handshake can instantly change a person's condition. By presenting your hand with your palm up, you will show the openness of your intentions and win the person over. By presenting your hand with your palm down, you will show authority, and the person will not feel very comfortable in your company. And if you want to reassure your other half, take her hand with both hands, and your partner will feel protected next to you.
These are not all the psychological techniques and tricks with which you can influence the mood, state and consciousness of people. But they are quite enough for a start, and you will learn many others in practice, being attentive to the behavior of yourself and those around you. And on the pages of our website we will talk about such things more than once.
For now, let's summarize. And as a small conclusion, we offer you a wonderful video, the author of which talks about the secrets of the charisma and charm of Graham Norton, a famous Irish TV presenter, actor and comedian.
We also recommend reading:
- Storytelling
- How to communicate with manipulators
- How to gain trust, find friendship and find love. Life hacks from an FBI agent
- Body language for self-confidence
- Nonverbal communication
- Psychological pressure and how to resist it
- "Foot in the door" reception
- Language of the body
- Development of communication skills
- How to leave a good first impression. Secrets of Leila Lowndes
- Habits that lead to hell
Key words:1Psychoregulation
Ways to influence your interlocutor
The basis of psychological techniques for influencing an interlocutor is observation of the individual and knowledge of some behavioral nuances.
Let's look at some of the simplest techniques that can be useful in everyday life.
- To emerge victorious from an argument, no matter how much you want, never raise your voice. After the interlocutor lets off steam, he will feel empty and guilty before you, which you can quickly take advantage of and convince him that you are right.
- Knowing that there is a liar in front of you, you can easily expose him to clean water using pauses in the conversation. Be silent, and then the interlocutor will have no choice but to fill the silence with his “confession.”
- Phrases cannot be started with negative words: instead of “Would you like to walk with me to the cafe” - “Come with me to the cafe.” With a negative pretext, you program the querent in advance to refuse.
- Avoid phrases that radiate uncertainty: apologies for no reason, words of doubt like “It seems to me,” etc. They humiliate you in the eyes of your interlocutor.
