How to develop persistence if you don’t have it? / Orthodoxy.Ru

Use visual motivation

To learn how to achieve your goals, you need to be as specific as possible about what exactly you want. Our thinking is structured in such a way that the more abstract our desire, the more difficult it is for us to imagine exactly how we will go towards it. For example, if you want to save money for a trip to Europe, then you cannot stop at such a vague formulation. Think through and write down—or even sketch—every last detail. Where, how and what will you travel, where will you stay, what sights will you see, what things will you pack in your luggage and what souvenirs will you bring to your friends. This way you can immediately estimate how much money you need to save - and the goal will become much clearer.

If you want, for example, to lose weight, then not only hang photos of your dream figure everywhere, but also visualize your own excess weight. For example, build a pyramid of pencils, where each pencil symbolizes 100 grams of excess weight. Remove 1 pencil for every 100 grams of weight lost and watch how such a pyramid melts before your eyes.

Periodically study the biography and secrets of success of famous and rich people

Firstly, let's start with the fact that reading is always good; we draw knowledge and experience from books and literature, naturally, only if these are not banal pulp novels or fiction, which only knows how to clog our brain . And by studying biography and reading interviews of famous people, on a subconscious, and on a conscious level too, you begin to understand that you can live differently, or rather much better.

By the way, the more you read about rich people (by the way, we are not talking about show business and cinema stars, but about businessmen, politicians and simply brilliant people), the more often you will be convinced that wealth and success can be achieved not only thanks to rich relatives or connections, but also thanks to your own potential. And, the most important thing that can lead a person to wealth is perseverance. And from someone else’s example, you can be perfectly convinced of this. A. now pay attention, this is the psychological trick - sooner or later you will get tired of reading about the success of other people, perseverance will awaken in you, and you will want to get down to business yourself.

Divide into small steps

Once you have decided on your goal, break it down into as many simple steps as possible. Then follow these small steps religiously and don't stop until you complete them all one by one. It is much easier to complete each such small task than to think about the entire global task.

For example, you want to get a salary increase. Think about what you need to do for this and who to talk to? Make a list of your work achievements and arguments for a salary increase, talk with your immediate supervisor about the possibility of such an action, find out who you need to contact directly, calculate the approximate amount of the increase, write a speech, choose the right time. If you couldn’t complete some point, then review the plan and make adjustments to it.

Respect yourself and others

It is very difficult to learn to respect yourself and others as equals. The roots of painful shyness grow, oddly enough, not from excessive modesty, but precisely from unequal treatment of people. It is important to understand that others have no desire to harm you, do you bad or offend you. Therefore, you have the right to demand respect from them for your own person in exchange for respect for them. Don’t be silent if you have something to say, don’t be afraid to meet new people, don’t be afraid to refuse and insist on your own - all these are signs of respect for people. Reasoned criticism is also a sign of respect, so don’t be shy to sometimes criticize others in a gentle way if you can explain your own view of the situation.

Keep an eye on the outside

External attributes play an important role in demonstrating perseverance. Willy-nilly, you will have to interact with other people. In order to be persistent and achieve your goal, focus on the external manifestation of emotions, posture and posture. Keep your back straight, which will give you confidence, don’t hide your gaze, don’t raise your voice or whisper. The more evenly and calmly you behave, the greater the chances that you will be able to accomplish your plans the first time.

If it’s difficult for you to immediately change your strategy of external behavior, then return to point 2 of our list and write down all possible actions in small steps: what is better to wear, how to monitor your posture, what gestures confident people make. Observing persistent people or reading books and articles on popular psychology can help you with all this. For example, something about sign language. Don’t worry if everything doesn’t work out right away, and try to introduce the external habits of a persistent and self-confident person one at a time. Very soon they will become inseparable from you.

Realize the benefits of affirming yourself

Increase your conviction by recognizing the benefits of acting assertively. You can improve your communication skills, avoid hypocrisy, and ensure that everyone is happy with honest and candid interactions. So, strengthen your resolve and start being more assertive today.

It's never too late to become more assertive and change your old habits and behaviors. Even if we are sweet and kind, sometimes it helps to be more firm and confident. What other tips do you have for becoming more assertive?

Encourage your success

To achieve success, you need to think positively. First, make a list of your good qualities and strengths. Before starting any important task, do not forget to review it, update it and recharge yourself with positivity. Save all certificates of commendation, letters of gratitude and simply quotes from correspondence where you are highly appreciated.

At the same time, do not forget to praise yourself from time to time - be sure to reward yourself for a job well done, perseverance or other success.

This could be simply an entry in a special “diary of victories,” a note on a blog, or a bar of your favorite chocolate. The main thing here is the emotional message.

Take a holistic approach

Remember that in the matter of perseverance there are no unnecessary trifles. Any detail that we are talking about now must be taken into account. If you start skipping some steps as too obvious, then at the right moment the whole overall strategy may not work due to some small overlap. Try to always look at the problem comprehensively, then nothing can take you by surprise.

By the way, preparing in advance for a possible failure is also a very useful thing. It must always be kept in mind. As soon as you start achieving something, be sure to think about what you will do if you fail to achieve your plan. This should not be considered a readiness for defeat - rather, reasonable rear cover in case of a tactical retreat.

KONSPEKTY.NET

Persistence is one of the most sought-after human qualities. Almost every one of us would like to have it. However, only a few succeed. Let's try to figure out why this happens and how you can develop perseverance in yourself.

It seems strange, but psychologists note this fact: every person is persistent from birth. It is worth remembering absolutely any baby on Earth. How does he behave when he wants something? Yes, very, very persistently. He sobs bitterly, falls and hits the ground with his feet and hands, begs. Parents know with what zeal a child can beg for something, come again and again, remember day after day and continue to believe that his persistence will be rewarded. It’s as if the idea itself, stuck in the little man’s head, wants to come true at any cost.

However, as the years pass, this quality becomes less and less noticeable. It's clear. After all, we all live in a society where it is impossible to always get what we want. However, it often goes to the other extreme: when by adolescence, many people already have a deficiency of this innate quality. Let's try to understand how to develop persistence when a person no longer has enough of it.

First, let's figure out what persistence is. In various psychological dictionaries, this personality quality is characterized as the ability to overcome various obstacles (external and internal) to achieve set goals. From this definition, the first step you need to take to develop persistence is to define your goals. You need to ask yourself what you want to achieve.

After the goals have been set, it’s time to define the tasks, that is, decide how this or that result will be achieved, and develop specific steps. At this stage, you need to carefully choose priorities: what is primary and what is less important.

The goal is set, tasks are defined, priorities are set. We begin to move towards the fulfillment of our cherished dreams. But suddenly, after a couple of days, it begins to seem to us that the goal is not good enough, that maybe we shouldn’t have started. Suddenly your strength disappears... Such manifestations indicate one thing - lack of motivation. That is why, before we start doing something, we need to carefully think about what will motivate us on the way to the goal, from what ideas we will draw strength and inspiration to move forward. The trick here is that you need to formulate the motives for yourself in advance, literally memorize them and repeat them as axioms when things get difficult. If there is no motivation, then when a crisis occurs, it will become much more difficult for a person to convince himself to move on. The fact is that the path to the goal is like the movement of a ship. Sometimes fog falls and the shore (the final destination) suddenly becomes invisible. To survive such moments, you need to have a clear and unshakable confidence in the need to move on. Such faith in one’s strengths and one’s own goal in difficult moments should be akin to religious, and therefore it is better to develop it in oneself in advance, when a person is inspired and full of energy.

So, let’s say that on our way to answering the question of how to develop perseverance, we have already set goals and objectives, and began to act, and even overcame a couple of crisis moments when we wanted to give up everything. What's next? And now we need to remember that a person is still not a robot. He cannot only automatically and steadily move towards the goal. Even a car needs refueling to continue its journey. For us, the source of energy will be various incentives. We are not talking about the external attributes of achievements: medals, certificates and cash prizes (although why not). First of all, we must encourage ourselves for our own sake. We did something necessary, planned, but not very interesting - and finally we allowed ourselves to indulge in our favorite hobby. You can use anything as a reward for yourself. And again, it’s better to think about how and in what cases we will reward ourselves, it’s better in advance. It’s always easier to start moving along the path when you already know approximately where you are going, what tests you will face, and even what pleasant sensations you can experience.

So, we conclude the conversation about how to develop persistence. Finally, let’s repeat all the steps we mentioned point by point. Everything should always be strictly and logically structured, especially where we are talking about achieving any goals.

Steps to develop persistence:

Define ultimate goals.
Set tasks that need to be solved on the way to achieving goals.
Set priorities, i.e. determine what is less and more important, which of the planned things can be done earlier and which can be done later.
Develop a motivation system. How will we convince ourselves to move on when we get tired.
Come up with a reward system. It is advisable to specifically indicate what we will allow ourselves to do or eat, where to go after we complete some task.

Let us repeat once again that all these steps need to be carefully thought out in advance. And only then, having weighed all the pros and cons, crossing out the unnecessary from the list and adding the missing, begin to act. And having already set out on the path to developing perseverance, try not to turn back, not to change goals, objectives and methods of encouragement, no matter how difficult it may be. It is important! After all, drawing up a clear plan and strictly following it is the most important tool on this path.

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Repeat until victory

Don't be afraid to repeat something if you didn't succeed the first time. It may not work the second time or even the third time - that’s okay. Do not think that contacting the same person with the same question several times is intrusiveness or importunity. Most questions, cases and problems require multiple approaches, especially since between them you will have the opportunity to analyze the mistakes you have made and understand exactly why it was not possible to do it. There are also situations when the plan cannot be realized for some specific reasons and it cannot be otherwise. But this is already a matter of competent planning - you need to set realistic goals for yourself, then you won’t have to doubt the repetition strategy.

Why is it important to develop willpower?

Those who consider willpower to be an innate characteristic like temperament or mentality are wrong. Will is the muscular frame of our personality; it becomes stronger from constant training and weakens from idleness. It can be developed and strengthened at any age.

Why is this necessary? To answer this question, look back at your life and imagine that you had the will and perseverance to achieve all your goals. Who would you be now? Do you like this person? Does he look like the real you?

Now think about your current goals. They have a chance to become reality. And after a while, looking back again, you will be able to proudly state that you have become the person you wanted to be today. Or they will remain pipe dreams, buried under a thick layer of laziness and lack of will. The choice is yours. As they say, the strong look for a way, and the weak look for a reason.

I suggest you honestly answer the following questions to determine how developed your will muscle is.

Do you have bad habits?
Do you often put off important tasks until the last minute?
Do you spend a lot of time hanging out on social networks and watching TV series?
Do you find it difficult to concentrate on a specific task and work without distractions?
Do you tend to give up on things you start without finishing them?
Have you ever tried unsuccessfully to go on a diet to lose weight?

If you answered “yes” to most of the questions, I have two news for you: good and bad. The bad thing is that you clearly lack willpower. The good thing is that by reading this article to the end, you will take the first step in the right direction. I have prepared for you 9 effective psychological techniques and ways to develop willpower.

Be ready to interact

Almost always, perseverance requires that you be able to accept help from others and be willing to help someone else. In this case, you should not be shy, because mutual assistance is the basis not only of teamwork, but also of personal success. There is nothing wrong with asking someone to help you do something if you show that you are willing to give them your own capabilities in return. And it is not at all necessary that it be a close friend or an old acquaintance - even strangers can and should be helped.

How to become persistent: 8 rules

Eric Barker is the author of the popular personal effectiveness blog Barking Up The Wrong Tree, a columnist for the New York Times, the Wall Street Journal and other publications.

"Hold on!" "Be persistent!" "Never give up!"

I often hear calls for perseverance and perseverance. But I don’t often see convincing information on how to really strengthen these qualities. How can we become more persistent? How can we stand our ground despite life’s enormous challenges and ultimately achieve success? I looked at the most difficult scenarios - when you have to decide literally questions of life and death: what do the winners do in these cases, and what do the losers do?

And it turns out that surviving the most dangerous situations teaches quite a lot about how to be tenacious and persistent in everyday life. Whether you're facing unemployment, work challenges, or personal tragedies, here are a few thoughts to help you.

be careful

The first step when faced with difficulties is to acknowledge them - and as early as possible. It seems obvious, but we all begin to deny problems at one time or another. But people who survive life-threatening situations are able to move faster than others from denial, anger, depression to awareness and even acceptance of an unpleasant reality. If you leave yourself in the dark or live in denial, things get much worse, often very quickly. When you know you have a problem, you can take action.

I'm not saying paranoia is a good thing, but research shows that a little anxiety is good for you if you want to live longer. So you've admitted that you have a problem. What's the next step?

Manage your emotions

Sometimes scuba divers drown even when they still have oxygen supply. How is this possible? Something goes wrong, they panic and instinctively push the regulator out of their mouth - some people feel very suffocated when their mouth is covered, and this leads to an urgent desire to free their nose and mouth. This is a reasonable emotional response in other situations, but an incorrect response in special, unnatural situations like scuba diving.

Psychologically stable people understand the complexity of the situation, remain calm and evaluate everything rationally in order to plan and take action on time. People who know how to survive have little time to become upset over a loss or experience stress because something goes wrong. They don't take themselves too seriously and therefore find it difficult to threaten.

Know how to quit

Many of you will probably be surprised: “The secret of perseverance is the ability to leave, not to finish something?” But if you look at people surviving in dangerous situations, it turns out that many of them realize in time that they need to get away and run. This is the ability to see yourself, your abilities, your mental state, and realize that it is better to turn back and try again later than to stand your ground and lose all chances.

When a company starts laying off people, there is always some smart employee who instantly jumps ship and pre-negotiates a new job. Some people are smart enough to realize that they will never be great dancers and that they would be better off doubling down on something like playing poker.

The ability to quit and leave in such cases makes you happier, reduces stress, and improves your health. Research shows that people who master this skill experience fewer depressive symptoms, lower cortisol levels, and better immune function. Over time, they experience fewer health problems. You can do anything—when you let go of the idea that you need to be able to do everything.

Have illusions

Marshall Goldsmith studied incredibly successful people, and after collecting a lot of data, he realized what they had in common - “they are crazy!”

The presence of illusions should not be perceived as something bad. On the contrary, they help us to be more effective. If you perceive reality completely objectively, your goals will be too small, Goldsmith notes. Illusions and misconceptions motivate people to try again and again, even after failure. Successful people often fail, and in this respect entrepreneurs are similar to people who know how to survive.

But you need to distinguish between greater self-confidence and denial of problems. The second is very harmful, the first can help a lot. That is, perceive the world adequately - but believe that you are a star.

Prepare – even when it’s too late to prepare

Who survives in dangerous situations? People who have done it before. Who were preparing. Although you can't truly prepare for a layoff or divorce, you can work on your productive skills and habits and get rid of bad ones. The right habits don't tax your willpower and thus help you be more resilient and persistent. At the same time, of course, any preparation should be as close as possible to the real scenario of events.

Busy, busy and busy again

The best way to survive and keep your emotions under control when things get difficult in life is to work as much as possible. Harvard psychiatrist Richard Mollica, who studies trauma, says this is a major concern for people who have experienced trauma. Work instills order in the brain. And resilient people know that keeping busy not only brings you closer to your goals, but it's also the best way to stay calm. And, believe it or not, we're all happier when we're busy.

Call it a game

In his book Touching the Void, Joe Simpson tells the harrowing story of how he broke his leg 5 kilometers up a mountain. And he didn’t just break it, he smashed it to pieces. Joe and his fellow climber decided it was time to say goodbye to life. But Joe survived. One of his secrets is to turn the slow and terribly painful descent into a game. He saw a certain necessary order in the movements and began to carefully repeat it. Each rep was another step down, and he forgot about everything else around him. His torment became a dance, and the dance freed him from the horror of what was yet to be done.

Neuroscience suggests that the patterns stimulate the same part of the brain that cocaine does, inducing feelings of security, reward, and just a great sense of self. These sensations arise due to drugs, but also due to the fact that you manage to learn a new skill, a new habit, or do something in an organized manner.

And this system can be used for everyday problems: How many resumes will you send today? Can you beat yesterday's record? The ability to celebrate small victories, the ability to enjoy them, is a common trait of those who survive.

Seek help and help yourself

Help is great, but sometimes we feel ashamed or embarrassed to ask for it. Don't let pride get in your way! But what’s even more interesting is that even in the most difficult moments, helping others means helping yourself. By caring for others, we make our lives more meaningful, which helps us succeed. Sometimes selflessness is the best form of selfishness, and research shows that those who are able to give achieve more and live longer.

Helping someone forces you to step beyond the limits you have set for yourself, to rise above your fear. Now you are not a victim, but a rescuer. You draw others to the surface, and their reaction, in turn, draws you up. Many people who survived difficult situations said that they tried not for themselves, but for the sake of someone else - the relatives who were waiting for them at home.

When the threat passes, the smoke clears, can we return to normal? In fact, sometimes life gets even better.

Original post - www.bakadesuyo.com/2014/07/how-to-be-resilient/

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Analyze your progress

After taking every small step towards your goal, after every important conversation and small victory - or small failure - be sure to take a couple of minutes to analyze the action. What did you succeed and what didn’t? What do you think helped you with this? What could have been done better? What was the hardest thing to do?

Formulate the answers to these questions - and next time it will be much easier for you to perform a similar action.

And once you get used to analyzing all your activities, such an analysis will take a matter of seconds.

How to Be More Persistent and Never Give Up: The Ultimate Guide

Persistence may be an abstract concept, but the ability to continue doing certain things is physical. Each of us pushes ourselves every day to achieve goals, although sometimes they seem out of reach. Eventually, we gradually begin to lose patience and the desire to achieve a certain goal disappears.

How to become more persistent? A person who keeps moving forward no matter what? And is it possible to never give up, even when you give up?

In this article we will look at the best motivational practices that I used when learning a foreign language. These short recommendations are quite universal and can be used for any activity: from climbing a mountain to writing a thesis.

Stop comparing yourself to others

People who don't give up respect their competitors, but rarely question their potential or achievements. In this regard, it is very important to recognize the fact that some people achieve the desired result easier and faster than you. Moreover, comparing yourself to other people in the early stages, when you are just beginning to face difficult challenges, can lead to a loss of motivation and reluctance to overcome these challenges.

According to Psychology Today, social comparison can be divided into two types: downward and upward. According to the study, self-esteem is primarily threatened by downward comparisons that pit you against someone you perceive to be less successful than you. Thus, if a person you consider less qualified is superior to you, it can make you doubt your own abilities.

However, I believe it depends on the person and the individual's ability to deal with both types. Dealing with upward comparison was the hardest thing for me. I wasn't the best student in Spanish class, and my classmates' achievements added even more stress as they coped with the workload and complex grammar rules much faster than I did.

Due to this, my self-esteem suffered greatly for several months, but then I realized that by ignoring the successes of other students, I could concentrate on the goals I had set. Each time I realized that I was comparing my grades and learning speed with the results of other students, I repeated to myself: each person has his own path.

A good exercise that helped me a lot was making a list of my 10 strengths and weaknesses. Next to each weakness, I indicated exactly how it affects my progress. I then looked for proven methods and solutions that other students recommended on forums that helped me turn my weaknesses into strengths.

Refrain from complaining and indignation

If you have already overcome the comparison stage, you might feel the bitterness of self-pity. Did you know that the average person complains about 30 times a day? How often do you show dissatisfaction with the people around you or with what is happening? Perhaps someone has already noticed this behavior in you and said that your whining is unbearable. This is a sign that you should stop feeling sorry for yourself, as this pity can eventually turn into grumbling and an indignant reaction to the environment. Plus, there's another reason to break the habit—this study has shown that complaining harms your health, relationships, and career.

Sometimes it becomes very difficult to suppress complaints, especially if you are in pain and find it difficult to move.

So, when you are thinking about giving up, remember all the effort, time, nerves and money spent on achieving your set goal. What stage are you at? Are you just starting your journey or are you already halfway through? Think positively and encourage yourself. After a short rest you will be able to move on.

If you are bored and no longer enjoy learning, remember: the goal you set has not yet been achieved. If you don't do everything you need to do today, you'll need to spend the same amount of time again next time. I know many students who, for various reasons, stopped learning a second language. And when they returned to the point where they stopped, they had to study the previously covered material again.

Plan all your activities

As my personal experience of learning a foreign language has shown, relying on your talent, intelligence and desire is not always enough to achieve the desired result. Perseverance means having the organizational skills and motivation that allow you to get ahead.

So how can you not give up and become more organized?

Plan all your activities on weekdays.
Always allocate more time to complete core tasks.
Complete no more than 4-6 tasks per day. You must be confident that you can complete them all.
Be strict about meeting deadlines for completing assigned tasks, especially if no one checks the results. Few people can constantly motivate themselves and demonstrate good results, so on Preply we have collected tutors who will help you plan and control the learning process, as well as inspire, help overcome uncertainty and cope with self-criticism.
Analyze the quality of completed tasks and identify specific steps to improve the efficiency of their implementation.
Balance your workload, rest and exercise so that you can always return to the main task without fatigue or boredom.
Be spontaneous and do something once a week that you haven't planned in advance.

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Get enough rest

In moments of complete exhaustion, focus not on your feelings, but on what exactly you can do to cope with them. If you are tired mentally or physically, always take a short break to restore your strength and desire to achieve your goal. Listen to music, meditate, dance, do yoga or just take a nap - any changes will be useful and will give you strength.

Unfortunately, these steps won't help if you're already on the verge of giving up on your goal. Don't believe the saying "Winners never quit!"

. A true winner many times experiences the desire to give up everything, but returns to the path of achieving the set goal. In such cases, perseverance is the key to success, which helps winners start over even if they face many difficulties along the way. So how can you find the strength to start over and get rid of the fatigue that kills perseverance? A long break (such as a two-week holiday in Portugal) can provide a break from routine and a positive experience.

Don't make excuses

If you take on something that seems insurmountable, then it is important to find proven ways to cope with the situation. The worst thing you can do is start thinking about an excuse to explain your decision (“it’s not mine,” “it’s not what I expected,” “I don’t need it anymore,” etc.). Go back to when you first started, to the very beginning. Do you remember the excitement of wanting to dive into a new adventure? Now imagine yourself crossing the finish line and being able to do whatever you want. What would you like to do? Are you confident that you will not give up on the next goal you set? You need to change how you feel and view the many obstacles in your path as part of the journey. Don't look for excuses - this will not bring the expected relief.

Finally, try to develop persistence through exercise, overcoming limitations and obstacles, and increasing endurance in sports. This will help you develop physically and prepare you for more important tasks.

Finally

Persistent people learn to overcome many obstacles, criticism and uncertainty. In this article, we have pointed out some tips and tricks that will help you achieve your goals. Share your own ideas on how to become more persistent and increase motivation.