What to write to a guy first? 100 phrases to start communication


08/30/201602/06/2017 Nadezhda Plotnikova 0 comments

Today, more and more often, princes meet not in beautiful castles, but on the Internet - social networks and dating sites. Such online relationships attract not only insecure girls, but also simply busy women.

If you have a worthy young man in your network contacts, why not take advantage of the situation and try to turn a non-committal exchange of messages into something more? The following tips will help you understand how to interest a guy by correspondence.

How to properly correspond with a man: 7 rules


Today, girls have a greater chance of meeting a modern prince on the Internet.
Successful communication through messages with a young man they like presupposes compliance with a certain behavioral algorithm.

7 rules for communicating by correspondence with a man, according to psychologists:

  1. Be polite. It is important to behave adequately in any topic of conversation; you should not show your irritation or impatience. Even if the interlocutor often disappears from the dialogue, you need to control yourself and not speak out on this matter.
  2. Talk about topics that interest him. It is advisable to study the pages of his social networks and understand what kind of things the interlocutor is interested in. Interest in his hobbies will help you easily maintain dialogue in the future.
  3. Write correctly. Frequent mistakes can turn a man off.
  4. Laugh at a man's jokes. This will flatter him. Young people enjoy having a dialogue with a girl who has a sense of humor. It is important not to resort to vulgar jokes.
  5. Be honest. You cannot start communication with lies, even the smallest ones. The lie will later be revealed, and this may cause conflict.
  6. Be careful when choosing topics for communication. At first it is better not to discuss religion or past relationships.
  7. Be unpredictable. Men love variety and mysterious women, so it is important to show your interlocutor different moods. It is important to behave appropriately so as not to look strange.

Psychologists recommend not using emoticons and pictures in messages to a man at first. The text should contain only words without strong emotional connotations.

Be sure to read:

What does it mean if a guy looks into your eyes and doesn’t look away, psychology

Remember that you are a lady!14

Profanity and slang expressions do not suit any girl. They are not recommended for use not only during virtual communication, but also during personal conversation. And, of course, grammatical errors will not add charm and charm to you.

As a result of following our simple rules, the result will not be long in coming within a short period of time. But how do you understand that the ice has broken and the guy has really started to fall in love? Everything is very simple, because he:

  • He begins to think a lot about you, and admits this quite openly in correspondence;
  • His dialogues contain words from your everyday conversation. That is, he practically copies your expressions, and you begin to speak the same language;
  • Active online. He is regularly the first to start a dialogue and reminds himself of himself in one way or another throughout the day. Interested in how your day went and whether you dressed for the weather;
  • His messages become shorter but more meaningful;
  • He regularly appears online and responds to your messages with lightning speed, even in the middle of the workday.

All these signs are the same signal that the feelings are mutual, and therefore you should not delay the real meeting.

How to intrigue him, lure him in and not impose himself

There is an opinion that women's initiative is punishable. In a sense, this is true, but no one forbids sometimes writing first, showing the young man an interest in communication. Coldness and ignoring are just as repulsive as intrusiveness.

Basic rules for unobtrusive correspondence with a man:

  • messages from a woman should be more often in response than initiating communication;
  • the text must be shorter than in a message from a man;
  • You cannot respond to messages instantly; it is important to wait a few minutes.

The girl must keep in mind that she creates her own image in correspondence. The texts a man receives characterize her as a person in his eyes.

You can’t constantly complain about life and create in his head the image of an unlucky crybaby .
Only a successful girl can truly hook a guy.

Preparatory work: before you write

Before surfing the vastness of a dating site, check if everything is in order with your virtual face - a profile that, like the right dress, should emphasize your strengths and hide your flaws. We have already discussed in detail how to fill out a profile for a girl on a dating site in order to leave a clear, succinct and vivid impression of yourself. Read it.

She put herself in order - with the attention of a tracker, she studied the profile of the guy to whom she was about to write, with desperately sparkling eyes. You need to know the enemy by sight. Any profile on a dating site, except an empty one, provides a lot of useful information. In particular, it answers the question of what words to write to a guy first. Cling to the information kindly provided.

How can you tell if a guy is interested in you?


You can’t constantly complain about life and create in his head the image of an unlucky crybaby.
The first sign indicating his interest will be the desire to find a girl on all social networks. It will be interesting for a young man to look at photographs and know a little more about the life of his interlocutor.

You can determine a guy’s level of interest by the following signs:

  • he writes first;
  • tries to hold the dialogue as long as possible;
  • often online waiting for a “meeting”.

The main indicator of successful communication is how willingly a guy talks about himself and shares his secrets. This sign can be checked using careful leading questions about family, childhood, work, etc.

What questions can and should be asked, and what not?

Correctly constructed dialogue at the beginning of communication is the key to successful relationships in the future.

There are topics that are best left untouched, and there are questions that need to be asked first:

  • Ask about lifestyle, hobbies, interests. It is important to show interest as men love it when a woman shares their hobbies and is curious.
  • Ask for advice on a topic in which he understands. But don’t burden him with your problems right away.
  • Ask for help. This should be a simple request, but you should definitely praise the guy for solving the problem.

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If the girl previously knew the guy she liked, then you can remember some pleasant or funny moments of communication from the past. This move can evoke a feeling of nostalgia.

Topics to avoid:

  • his earnings and level of income;
  • relationships with ex-girlfriends;
  • sex;
  • religion and attitude towards religion.

Literacy at its best

Competent written speech is a sign of respect for the interlocutor.
Don't force him to sort through an incoherent jumble of words and letters. Conduct your correspondence wisely! This does not mean that everything written needs to be sat down and checked thoroughly with a spelling dictionary. It is enough to minimize the most common errors in your messages:

  1. Remember more often about punctuation marks, use them appropriately. Stream of consciousness without commas and periods is good for the classics of modernism, but don’t make the guy guess how to understand your “execute cannot be pardoned.”
  2. Avoid using ellipses. Do not use them in place of other punctuation marks. Such text looks like the speech of a inhibited person who has difficulty collecting his thoughts.
  3. A message written in capital letters (capslock) is often perceived as a shout. It is extremely bad form to write entire phrases in capslock.
  4. An excess of exclamation marks is also evil. For a short message about something out of the ordinary, this design is suitable, but for constant communication it is not. Every phrase with an exclamation mark (or three) at the end gives the impression of the hysterical screams of a person who cannot control his emotions.
  5. The requirement to put a period at the end of a sentence when communicating online is gradually disappearing. It is acceptable to send a response in a chat or SMS with one phrase without a period; this is happening more and more often in the Internet community. And the interlocutor will guess that the phrase is finished. However, in longer statements it is still necessary to separate sentences with periods.
  6. Use only words and terms whose meanings you know exactly. If you have at least a minute before writing an answer, do not be lazy to send a request to a search engine and check yourself.

Some more useful tips in this video:

How to surprise a man via SMS

You can surprise a man in a virtual conversation only with the help of surprise.


The best emotions will be caused by photos sent via SMS.

If the woman remained distant throughout the entire period of communication, wrote briefly and reservedly, then she may cause genuine surprise with a sudden offer to meet. The male sex does not understand female hints and cannot read minds, so occasionally you can directly state your desires.

Photos sent via SMS will evoke the best emotions. Pictures should be beautiful, but not vulgar.

How and what to write to get a guy to like you

To interest a man, a woman should not tell everything about herself. You can lure a guy into long-term correspondence and further relationships by being sincerely interested in him. Any uninteresting dialogue can be decorated with a question about the interlocutor and his life.

It is necessary to support his interests, for example, if a guy has photos with his dog on a social network, then you can write that the girl also loves dogs.

Here it is important not to lie or go too far: if the interlocutor does not understand the topic or is not interested in it, the guy will immediately figure it out and catch the girl in a lie.

With the help of leading questions about his hobbies, you can develop an emotional and lively dialogue that a man will want to return to again. Feel free to ask questions about any matter. Classic themes - favorite books, films, music. It’s best to start asking about your preferences in cinema, since the guy may not be keen on reading.

Be sure to read:

How to make a man think about you: 12 techniques on how to attract a person from a distance

Step #7: Show initiative

Now you are completely ready to start correspondence. Take courage, breathe in more air - and go into battle! Many girls are driven into a stupor by the question: what should they write in order to make a guy like them?

Just don’t start your battle with the usual “hello, how are you doing,” “hello, let’s get acquainted,” “hello, cool.” Well, it's corny, isn't it? Remember yourself when you get something like this. Are you excited and ready for instant communication? Hardly.

Think through your appeal. It is very important for you to start a dialogue and provoke him to respond.

Here are good examples of what you can write to a guy. You can write something like “Your smile is so cool that I couldn’t resist. Smile at me, please!” or “Listen, you remind me of a Hollywood actor...”

If you know what a young man is interested in, you can take a chance and write: “Hello! I am looking for a companion for horseback riding/karting. You will make it up.

Do you have any doubts about how to contact a guy? You or you? If the man is younger or about the same age as you, or you know each other a little, then it is quite possible to address him as “you”. If he is much older, or if you are turning to him with a specific request, and you do not know each other, then it is better to use “you”.

By the way, addressing yourself as “you” is a win-win option in any case. You kill two birds with one stone: you position yourself as a well-mannered young lady and attract 100% attention.

Let us note that psychologists strongly recommend avoiding the use of the negative particle “not”: “isn’t it”, “do you agree, no?”, “could you…”, “would you like to talk to me?” From a suggestive point of view, denial begets denial.

You don't want to be rejected, do you? It’s better to create affirmative forms: “you agree that...”, “I’m right, right?”

How to continue correspondence to keep the interlocutor’s interest

Starting a correspondence is a simple task, but then it is much more difficult to maintain the interest of the interlocutor for a long time.

Basic rules for developing dialogue:

  1. First of all, it is necessary to create an atmosphere of easy communication: you cannot demand anything from a man by correspondence and ask him uncomfortable questions. You should not create the feeling that a woman needs something from him: you should not ask for gifts or constantly beg for any help. We need to joke more. At first, laugh off serious questions.
  2. There is a list of questions that cannot be asked to a pen pal: “Where have you been?”, “Who were you with?”, “Why did you come back so late?”, “When will you write to me?”, “When will we meet?” etc. Men don’t like such questions, especially at the stage of meeting a woman.
  3. It is important not to forget to monitor your speech, choose the right words and expressions so as not to frighten your interlocutor.
  4. You cannot write messages that are too long, no more than 300 characters at a time.

To maintain long correspondence and mutual interest, it is important to feel balance in everything. You can’t seem too cold and at the same time force yourself on a man.

You should not use abstruse words or write long phrases; communication should be easy. It is necessary to show the man that the interlocutor does not pursue any selfish goals in communicating with him.

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