If you are faced with symptoms of “haze” or “veil” in your head, feelings of unreality both of what is happening around you and of your own “I”. If you feel that your emotions have become more faded and dull, that you have lost the emotional connection with what usually brings you joy, then this article is for you.
In it I will tell you how to get rid of derealization and depersonalization , explain what it is and list the symptoms . I will not advise taking pills, since they do not eliminate the cause of this illness. I will tell you about safe, effective and natural ways to solve this problem for good.
This article is based both on the advice of Western psychologists (I must admit that in our country methods of working with derealization are poorly developed) and on personal experience of getting rid of derealization.
Some time ago, as a result of severe stress, I experienced panic attacks and anxiety. The most unpleasant thing about this was that the sudden attacks of fear, panic and constant anxiety were accompanied by other symptoms. One of them was a feeling of “haze”, “fog” in the head, a feeling of some kind of “separation” from the outside world and from one’s own emotions.
At first I thought it was some kind of serious mental illness. When these symptoms appeared, I began to worry greatly, unable to get rid of anxious thoughts about my condition. Then it got even worse. Even when there was no derealization, I was still afraid: “What if this sensation returns? What if this is a symptom of madness?
But now I remember my anxiety with calm humor. All this is a long time ago. Now I am in a state of deep and strong connection with my feelings and the outside world. I perceive the world clearly. I don't feel like life is passing somewhere away from me. I feel like I'm alive.
Here I am going to share with you effective techniques for getting rid of derealization and depersonalization that helped me get out of this state.
By the way, subscribe to my Instagram using the link below. Regular useful posts about self-development, meditation, psychology and relieving anxiety and panic attacks.
Load more...Follow instructions on Instagram
Symptoms of derealization and depersonalization
What is derealization and how does it differ from depersonalization? In short, derealization is a feeling of unreality of what is happening around (or a certain “separation”, “distance” from external events) and depersonalization is a feeling of unreality of what is happening inside.
Derealization (as well as depersonalization) in most cases is not an independent disorder. Most often, it is simply one of the symptoms of panic disorder (panic attacks) and/or anxiety disorder. However, if you experience such symptoms, it is always better to consult a doctor just in case to be 100% sure that your derealization is due to anxiety and not something else!
Symptoms of derealization
- Feeling of “haze” or “veil” in the head
- Feeling as if signals from the outside world are reaching us late
- The state of an “observer” cut off from external reality who perceives this reality as a film
- Familiar things (beautiful landscapes, favorite people or objects, entertainment) do not awaken an emotional response
- The state in which we live this life as if in a dream
Symptoms of depersonalization
- Feeling of “fading”, “dullness” of one’s own emotions and experiences
- A feeling in which both our body and our emotions seem foreign to us
- Feeling of unreality (“fuzzy” “uncertainty”) of one’s own self
A symptom associated with both conditions
- Worry and anxiety about the state of derealization/depersonalization
In principle, these states accompany each other. Moreover, many researchers do not distinguish between them at all. One way or another, when we are aware of the external world, we still “filter” information about it through the prism of our internal perception, which is also aware of the internal world. In other words, a person does not have two separate types of perception for external and internal reality. One perception.
And if this perception is “disturbed” (I used this word in quotation marks so that you do not be afraid: derealization is a safe symptom, but more on that below), then this “disturbance” will inevitably extend to both the sensation of external and internal phenomena.
I described this principle not for abstract philosophizing, but to formulate a practical conclusion:
Methods and principles that will allow you to get rid of derealization will also eliminate depersonalization and vice versa. These two deeply interconnected phenomena do not require two different “treatment” schemes (again, I use quotes because I believe that there is no disease: derealization is a protective mechanism of the psyche; more on this below).
And in this article, when I write “derealization,” I will mean both the symptoms of derealization itself and the symptoms of depersonalization.
External information channels
And, of course, so that nothing distracts you from living in your own world, block external channels of information: do not watch TV, do not visit news sites and forums on the Internet, do not buy periodicals. Now the outside world has ceased to exist for you, and gradually it will also “forget” about you.
But it is worth remembering that this kind of “autonomous” existence is fraught with a number of dangers: no one will rush to your aid if trouble happens; you will have no one to turn to with a basic request, and there will be no one to simply “vent your soul” if such a need suddenly arises. After all, man is a social being, and, completely isolated from society, he sometimes feels very uncomfortable.
Why do derealization and depersonalization occur?
This problem has not yet been fully studied. And therefore it is impossible to answer this question with certainty. However, there are scientific theories that try to explain this phenomenon.
Personally, I am a supporter of the theory that derealization is a defense mechanism of our psyche. The whole irony of such an illness as panic attacks is that those symptoms that people consider dangerous to their lives are, in fact, designed to save that life in the event of a mortal threat. I'm talking about the symptoms of increased heart rate, rapid breathing, feelings of fear and panic (which are triggered by adrenaline surges). As I described in the article, the symptoms of a panic attack are all defense mechanisms of our body.
And derealization is also the same protective function.
One Western study found that on average 50% of people exposed to a traumatic event experience symptoms of derealization. Surely you have heard stories of people who found themselves in dangerous, stressful situations and described their experience as: “It seemed to me that this was not happening to me,” “It was as if it was in a dream.”
These are the symptoms of derealization. During moments of stressful events, our psyche seems to “close itself” from potentially traumatic experiences. And therefore it seems to us that what is happening is like a dream, that this is not happening to us. And here we can draw the following conclusion:
Derealization and depersonalization are not dangerous in themselves. These are simply defense mechanisms of our psyche, which strives to “close itself” from unpleasant experiences.
And you can get rid of this condition. I'll tell you how later.
Apathy, disconnection from reality
Good day. Quite a lot of stuff has accumulated, so I decided to try to write here.
I am 20 years old. And everything seems to be fine. Only inside it’s completely different. And this has been going on since high school, i.e. from the age of 15-16.
Looking back, I understand that at that time I was a “hedgehog”. Then episodes of depression, apathy and withdrawal began to appear for the first time. But they weren't that strong. There were also thoughts of suicide. But they passed quickly because I was clearly aware of the consequences. I think they call it the anti-suicide factor. Although later the thought of suicide gave way to another. The desire not to exist at all, to disappear. Although this is impossible. But then, after entering a university and moving to another city, all this did not go away. And, it seems to me, it has only deepened. Constant apathy. And even very good news doesn’t make me happy. I understand that this is good, but I don’t feel strong emotions. But some changes did occur. I became more withdrawn and suspicious of people. And it’s as if people themselves are avoiding me. I do not know why. Even if I start a friendship with someone, the relationship quickly fades and we grow apart. Although there may be many common interests and we feel comfortable communicating. Maybe it's because of my character or I don't know how to maintain relationships. As a result, by the age of 20, I have only 1 friend with whom we have been friends since school. And all thanks to his persistence. Without this, the relationship would have ended long ago. Because of this, I sometimes feel lonely. But it doesn't bother me so much anymore. You get used to it, I guess. Another thing that bothers me is that I feel guilty almost constantly. When I see people begging for alms or animals killed on the road and so on, I feel guilty. Although I realize that this did not happen because of me, nothing changes. Perhaps because of this, I was gradually “disconnecting” from reality. It's like there's a veil over my eyes. And I look through it. Or even inside yourself. And the glimpses when I turn on become less and less frequent. Although I study very well, I have no enthusiasm and my memory is getting worse. And the fact that you have to speak in public causes discomfort. I never liked it and I always get nervous like the first time. Only now do I realize that I am out of place. But it’s too late to change this, because I’m already graduating from university. I'm just tired of everything. I don't even know who I am. What are my talents, what could I and, more importantly, would like to do. I constantly want to sleep and feel cold. And I started getting colds more often. They say it could be psychosomatic. Although it could just be a lack of vitamins. As a result, at the age of 20, nothing is nice to me anymore, I distance myself from everyone and everything, I have no friends, no strong and constant interests, and I don’t understand what’s wrong with me.
Regarding contacting psychologists. I don't always know how to find the right words in a conversation. Besides, I can’t always admit some things to myself, let alone discuss them with someone. And the last time I was with a psychologist and he used o-cards, I just silently cried the entire session. I rarely cry, but then I was overcome by a wave of emotions. And I can’t say that the feelings were so strong, but I couldn’t stop. Therefore, there was no productive outcome. And students can’t often afford visits to psychologists.
I became detached from reality and started making up problems (2 answers)
How to get rid of derealization and depersonalization
Tip one - get out of the vicious circle of anxiety
As I already wrote, very often people (especially people with panic attacks and anxiety) begin to worry very acutely about their condition: inventing terrible diseases, fearing the harm that derealization can cause them.
First, I remind you that this condition is not dangerous. Secondly, as we remember, it is very often just one of the symptoms of anxiety. What does it mean? This means that when you start worrying about the symptoms of derealization, you provoke more anxiety or panic attacks, which in turn worsen the derealization!
So relax and try to let go of thoughts about your condition. If derealization has come, then it has come. You are already in “this boat”, so there is no point in worrying and stressing yourself out. Relax and try to accept this state. Don't resist or resist him. It's temporary. Just as it came, it will go.
You must strive for this, although it is difficult. People with chronic anxiety have such an anxious mind that they tend to worry constantly about everything. And when there is no reason, the mind finds one. And at first, it is very difficult to break this established habit and help yourself relax and stop worrying. However, it is possible. The following tips will partly address this problem.
Tip two - develop concentration
Psychologists give the following advice.
If you love to read, then you probably have a plan about what books to read in the future. (And if you don’t like it, it’s time to start) Personally, there are many books on my plan that are not very exciting, maybe even boring, but, nevertheless, I think that I need to read them. These could be books on history, science, or even fiction, serious, deep, but not exciting. Read books like this.
Try to keep your attention on the text (which will “slip”, since the text is not interesting) and return it every time you get distracted. This, firstly, will develop your concentration and certain areas of the brain, and secondly, it will allow you to be closer to the area of experience. After all, books, after all, stimulate your emotions, give birth to images in your imagination, helping you to be closer to yourself.
The brain does not see the difference between reality and imagination
But here are five facts about the features of his work that could change your life. Neuroscientist Jeremy Bennett talks about them.
1. The brain does not see the difference between reality and imagination.
The brain reacts equally to everything you think about. In this sense, for him there is no difference between objective reality and your fantasies. For this reason, the so-called placebo effect is possible.
If your brain thinks you're taking a pharmaceutical drug (not a sugar pill), it reacts accordingly. I drank a placebo, thinking it was aspirin, and the brain would tell the body to lower its body temperature.
The nocebo effect works in exactly the same way, but in the opposite direction. If a hypochondriac watches the evening news and hears about a new disease outbreak, he may even begin to physically feel its symptoms.
If you don't believe this is true, you can try an experiment. Close your eyes and imagine that someone close to you has been in an accident. Imagine a picture of a terrible accident in every detail. After a while, you will begin to physically feel aching pain in your stomach - the first sign of an acute anxiety disorder. This occurs because the hypothalamus, the part of the brain responsible for fear responses, causes the adrenal glands to overproduce the stress hormone cortisol.
The good news is that if you look at the world with rose-colored glasses, you probably feel happy more often due to abnormally high levels of serotonin (the joy hormone) in the blood. Any constructive thought or dreams about a bright future can improve your physical condition right here and now.
2. You see what you think about most.
Whatever you think about becomes the basis of your life experience. Let's say, if you buy a new car, you will begin to notice cars of this brand in the city more often. The thing is that after the purchase you think about your car more often than you thought before.
Why is this important to know? The fact is that you can get out of any stressful situation simply by reprogramming your thinking. On the other hand, if you try to analyze a political situation presented differently by different media, you will only believe those that reflect your own point of view.
There is something else. Have you ever noticed that people quickly group themselves into groups based on their interests? Positive people are more likely to be friends with other positive people, and hypochondriacs are more likely to be friends with hypochondriacs, right? This is not a coincidence. So if you want to change anything in your life, start by changing your thought patterns.
3. Most of the time, your brain operates on autopilot.
On average, the human brain generates 60 thousand thoughts per day. But more than 40 thousand of them will be the same thoughts that you were chasing in your head yesterday. This is why it’s so easy to slip into a tailspin of negative perceptions of life. And that’s why we often need to change our familiar environment to an unfamiliar one in order to “clear” our brains.
Negative thoughts create stress and anxiety on their own, even if there is no real reason for it. And they REALLY destroy your immunity, which is forced to react to it (see point No. 1).
Train your brain. Make him register positive thoughts more often. The more you try, the faster and easier it will be. Treating life consciously means trying to take all these unconscious processes under your own control. The ultimate goal of practice is to ensure that the majority of your default thoughts are positive.
4. Unplugging periodically is vital.
You may literally be drowning in thousands of negative thoughts that get stuck in your head throughout the day. That's why you need to switch off: it will give your immune system a break, making you healthier and happier.
The easiest way to “turn off” your brain for a few minutes is meditation. It allows you to turn your consciousness into a convenient and effective tool.
And further. About vacation. Choose active recreation: skiing, diving, hiking. The easier it is for you to focus on the process that excites you, the more effectively your head “clears”.
5. You can change your brain. Literally. Physically.
When you focus on some mental activity, your brain is actively generating new neural connections at that moment. Biologists call this process neuroplasticity.
Here's how it works. If you think that you are unable to lose weight, then over time you will only become stronger in this thought. But if you replace this subconscious belief with the thought: “I am in excellent physical shape,” then your brain will build new neural connections to it every time. You will increasingly begin to notice new opportunities that will allow you to turn this subconscious attitude into a new reality.
You have the opportunity to subjugate your consciousness and change. You have the ability to achieve whatever you want. The main thing is to believe in it. After all, any physical process begins with the thoughts that arise in your head.
At the autumn festival in Montenegro, we are organizing a special course called “Brain Care”. Come, you won't regret it!
Source
How reality can be just energy
We think of an atom as an organized group of electrons and protons moving around a neutron, but this figure is completely wrong.
The particles that make up atoms have no structure, size, weight, or physical presence. They have no height, length, width or weight and are nothing more than events in time. They have zero sizes.
Electrons also have no special presence - they are both a particle and a wave, depending on how they are observed.
They are never in one place at one moment, but instead exist in several moments at the same time.
Scientists have also discovered what is called "superposition", in which multiple particles other than electrons can be found in multiple places at one time.
What does all of this mean? This means that the more we learn about the subatomic world, the more we discover that we know nothing at all about the true nature of reality.
Mechanical perception
The last thing you need to do to reset your reality is to get rid of mechanicalness. Many actions and phenomena are so familiar that we accept them automatically, without using cognitive mechanisms. The following techniques will help you get rid of this.
Rearrangement
The simplest thing is to change the interior of your home. If paintings hang in the same places for years and furniture never changes location, gradually they cease to exist for you.
The point of this method is not to make global renovations and change your home beyond recognition. It is enough to make very small adjustments (move a vase from a table to a shelf, buy a floor lamp, etc.) to awaken memory and attention. This will help you see something new in something that has been familiar for a long time.
Unfamiliar route
A similar technique is changing the usual route (even contrary to logistics). It is not necessary to return home from work along a new road every time. But from time to time you need to choose other paths to expand the boundaries of your reality. In addition, you can sometimes turn your established daily routine upside down.
Francis Sakoyan aspects
The square symbolizes absent-mindedness, having your head in the clouds, daydreaming, confusion of thoughts, chaos in everyday life. Unreliable, they give the impression of naive people. The strong influence of the subconscious, momentary emotions and hidden mental processes control a person. Many mistakes due to lack of logic, forgetfulness, striving for unrealistic goals. They hide the details of their life, but can spill someone else's secret. Relationships with people are difficult due to a lack of objectivity. They are possessed by mysticism, intuition helps them see the motives of other people.
Copenhagen interpretation
Many scientists have come to the Copenhagen Interpretation as their conclusion for understanding reality.
The Copenhagen interpretation comes from the school of quantum mechanics, and it believes that reality does not exist without an observer to observe it.
Since reality is nothing but energy, then energy is aware when consciousness observes it.
This may be difficult to understand. Think of it this way: since particles exist in multiple areas at the same time, then they must respond to observation by choosing to exist in a single location, allowing the observer to have an image to observe.
A growing number of researchers in this field believe that reality exists only because human consciousness wills it into existence by interacting with the energy that makes up the universe.
Metamorphosis of worldview
The first step towards a reboot is changing your worldview. Looking at things more broadly, being a more attentive communicator, solving problems more effectively - all this is easier said than done. But there are habits that can help.
Five minute time out
Got excited, blurted out without thinking - most of us regret when in disputes we use the wrong arguments or do it too emotionally. One of the founders of the famous company 37signals, as well as co-author of the popular Signal vs Noise blog, Jason Fried, came up with a simple solution to this problem - a five-minute timeout.
Once at a conference, I argued until I was hoarse with my opponent. Until he suddenly said: “Boy, take a time out!” I asked what he meant? He replied that it is normal to have different points of view and defend them. But some ideas take time to understand and accept.
Think for five minutes and then tell me if you want to argue any more. He was right. In that discussion, I just wanted to prove something, not learn something.
Sometimes you don't even have five minutes - you need an instant reaction. But when communicating by e-mail, on social networks, or even answering questions at a conference, you can pause for quite a long time, weigh and think about your answer. Allow your brain to “digest” the incoming information - this will definitely affect your own views.
Kaleidoscope of judgments
David Foster Wallace, one of the most prominent American prose writers of our time, has repeatedly noted the dangers of a self-centered worldview and “default” thinking. In his opinion, it is extremely important to try on someone else’s point of view.
Imagine that you are standing in line at a supermarket. In front of you is a woman with a small child. He is naughty, she slaps him on the butt. Don’t rush to judge her, think about what you would do in her place?
Another example. You were cut off on the road. The first reaction is negative, but if you imagine yourself in the role of an impolite driver and think about what reasons you might have for this, your judgment about the situation may change. Wallace recommends doing these tricks regularly to help you better understand the world around you.
View from the outside
Another effective technique described by Wallace is to look at your work, creativity, or just your day from the outside.
Scientists have come up with a method to relieve irritation. To do this, you need to describe the annoying situation (orally or in writing) from a third person. It is assumed that this approach allows you to approach the assessment of the situation objectively, abstracting from the negative emotions associated with this experience. This kind of distancing can change not only one's perspective on a situation, but the situation itself.
My vision is just my vision. It's not the only one. Taking a look at a given situation “from the outside” is a good exercise for self-development.
This technique often reveals hidden problems that you could not see due to the umwelt.
New in blogs
That his desire to hold a vote on the amendments at any cost has embittered people.
False voting results are of no use to anyone and do not convince anyone.
Real results are visible today on the streets of Khabarovsk.
When, during one of the last rallies in this city, the crowd was asked, “Who voted against the amendments?” , a forest of hands rose.
For any politician, such isolation from the pulse of life of “their” people... is a disaster. Even for an absolute monarch.
A similar situation happened to Nicholas I in the early 1840s, when he began to think: What he wants, “his” people also want. As a result, a senseless war in Hungary, then a “dispute about the keys” of the Jerusalem Temple, which led to the catastrophe of the Crimean War.
The people did not need these wars and these disputes at all. They only pleased the monarch's vanity.
In fact, from the very beginning of his reign, Nicholas II made the same mistake.
Then zemstvo leaders dreamed of the constitutional development of Russia. This was a completely natural desire at a time when all European countries, except Russia, were already constitutional monarchies or republics.
And Nicholas II called this natural desire of the growing educated layer to rule their country “meaningless dreams.”
Nicholas II and his wife were confident in their hearts that the “deep people” did not need any constitution, that the common people loved “their” tsar, and that all the troubles were caused by “students and intellectuals.”
The same thing happens with Putin.
“He has lost his sense of reality,” as Angela Merkel said about him six years ago.
Today the elite does not consist of complete cretins: It understands that if the flywheel is allowed to spin, then with the second blow it will hit itself. There are still a lot of people... they will remain, but there are not so many of them at the top.
And then they will not find it enough.
Mass protests in Khabarovsk, which are now in their third week, should serve as a wake-up call for them.
Yes, Khabarovsk is a region where dissatisfaction with Putin has been building up for many years.
There are at least three reasons for this:
1. Transfer to Beijing in 2005 (the decision was made in 2004) of lands in the Khabarovsk Territory and Trans-Baikal Territory.
2. Chinese concessions for 49 years with the right of automatic extension for millions of hectares of agricultural land.
3. Transfer of the capital of the Far Eastern District from Khabarovsk to Vladivostok.
Voting for Sergei Furgal in 2020 actually took place under the slogan “Putini, leave Khabarovsk.”
Some experts say that the protests in Khabarovsk... are an isolated incident.
But I completely disagree with this.
Hatred towards the regime is already widespread - from Dagestan to Karelia, from the Bryansk region to Kamchatka.
Each region has its own problems, and local pro-Putin authorities only follow the Kremlin's line, but do not solve the problems.
And there are more and more of them.
The situation that has developed in Russia today is historically unique.
Russian absolutism or totalitarianism has always saved the country's gigantic expanses in the past.
Firstly, they allowed her to be separated from the whole world.
Secondly, news from the provinces arrived slowly.
A courier from Khabarovsk to St. Petersburg would take a month or two. And by the time I had finished galloping, everything would have dissolved.
And now there is the Internet. What happens in any corner of the world immediately becomes known in any part of Russia.
I think many residents of Khabarovsk are closely watching what is happening in Hong Kong or Minsk.
And Minsk residents are watching what is happening in Khabarovsk.
And everyone inspires each other.
Secondly, there is no Iron Curtain. Before the pandemic, many people traveled from Khabarovsk to work in South Korea.
Russians understand that despotism is not normal.
People got a taste of owning property and realized that they could live relying not on the state, but on their own hands and head.
They need a completely different power... not over them, but their power, which will ensure their interests.
Power chosen by them and controlled by them.
And this, to some extent, makes the current situation similar to pre-revolutionary Russia at the beginning of the 20th century.
The degree of dissatisfaction with the regime today is the same as it was at the end of the 1980s.
And Putin will not be able to withstand this pressure for long.
Historian Andrey Zubov.
Personal reality
But let's return to the question of personal reality. Yes, each of us has our own reality. The simplest example is that two motorists traveling along the same route at the same time may travel this route in completely different ways. One will constantly be cut off, he will encounter aggressive neighbors on the road, he will find himself in a dozen nervous, stressful situations. And the second one will calmly ride among friendly traffic colleagues, they will even let him through!
And now think about how each of them will describe the surrounding reality. The first one will tell you that there is complete chaos going on on the streets of the city now, the drivers today are all completely ill-mannered boors, they don’t know how to drive, everyone buys a license, and then drives in such a way that it’s literally scary to go out on the road! What will the second one say? Surely he will be stunned with surprise when he hears such a comment from his colleague! And he will say that the vast majority of motorists are wonderful, cultured people, that everyone follows the rules, behaves politely and correctly, and that driving around the city is very pleasant!
Both of these people live in the same time and space. BUT! But each of them lives in THEIR OWN reality. I hope this example has helped you understand what your reality is. This is not something from the category of fantasies and inventing an “ideal world”. These are the events that we attract into our lives, and from which this reality is created.
If you are firmly convinced that the overwhelming majority of people are good, then you will meet just such people all the time! And even those who behave disgustingly with everyone else will be nice and kind to you. And these are not just nice words. This is my personal life experience. I have accumulated so many similar examples that there is no longer any need to talk about “accident”.
Well, my friends, I hope this article has helped you understand the difficult question of creating reality. Yes, we really create our own reality. And yes, it may be completely different from all your friends and colleagues. And it depends only on you how comfortable and pleasant it will be for you!
Your Ekaterina
