What to do if you confess your love to a girl and she refuses?

Possible reasons

The girl may already have a boyfriend.
She keeps you close, but refuses the relationship, because you are a backup option for her. If the girl she liked refused the relationship, she had her own reasons for this. We will look at the most common options.

1. Your chosen one already has a person with whom she is in love. She can either be in a relationship with him or silently suffer from her love (possibly unrequited), but at the moment there is no place for you in her heart. In such a situation, if your feelings for the girl are strong, then you should wait, suddenly something will change in her life.
2. A recent breakup may cause a young person to be reluctant to enter into a new relationship. There may be unresolved feelings, pain from parting, and reluctance to step on the same rake. In this case, it is better not to put pressure on the girl, wait until she moves away from what happened in her life.
3. A young lady can refuse a guy in a situation where he was very intrusive, constantly called, overly patronized, in a word, “boring.”
4. Having other priorities in a girl’s life. A situation when a young lady devotes all her time, for example, to studying, preparing for exams, or problems in the family affect the impossibility of creating close relationships at this particular moment. In such a situation, it is necessary to treat the choice of your beloved with understanding. At the same time, nothing prevents you from trying to gain her favor.
5. You are only a friend to her. A situation where you find yourself in the friend zone. All the time we were communicating, the young lady saw in you only a friend, a comrade, a person with whom she could share her problems, seek help, but not someone with whom she could start a love relationship.
6. A situation where representatives of a future couple belong to different social classes can cause refusal and reluctance to enter into a relationship.
7. The girl has too high demands on her future partner. There are women who are waiting for a “prince on a white horse”, looking for someone who in reality does not exist.
8. She keeps you as a backup option. Perhaps she has a permanent boyfriend, in whose presence the young lady does not hesitate to flirt with you and shows interest. She needs you as a “back-up airfield” in case of a possible breakup with her current boyfriend.
9. She refuses because you are not her type. Perhaps she is not satisfied with your appearance or behavior, outlook on life, character.
10. The young lady has psychotrauma. This may include both a traumatic relationship with a man, and growing up in a family where parents constantly argued and the father offended the mother. A girl may, on a subconscious level, be afraid to enter into a relationship with someone, not wanting to experience all the possible negativity of living together.

Why is it so annoying to approach her?

First experience . Fear of the unknown is normal, every guy with an instinct of self-preservation experiences it. You don’t try to fix a computer if you’ve never held a screwdriver in your hands? What if it goes crazy? It’s the same with a girl: you don’t want to stupidly get into trouble and give a reason for your friends to laugh at you. That's why guys start Googling 1000 and one ways to meet people and memorize cool phrases.

The main mistake is that with this approach you show that you are the same as everyone else. One hundred percent people have already approached her to ask what time it is and where the library is. Stupid and primitive.

Nobody taught you this . Your father hardly taught you the basics of a pickup truck, and the female half of the family wanted to see you white and fluffy. So an obedient and comfortable boy has grown up, who stupidly doesn’t know what to do next in life. Balls of steel, men's solutions? No, have not heard.

The lack of male education is a pain for many guys. The father’s role, at best, was limited to fishing on weekends and the occasional “Well done, son” praise. I taught you to drink beer, and then swim out as you wish.

Who will a guy go to for experience? In the company of the same sub-men like him. He will google stupid “universal” tackles, get rejected and trample his self-esteem into crap.

Physical problems . A man with complexes is afraid of women’s refusal because he cannot accept himself. His classmates laughed at his burr, they teased him as a “nerd” because of his glasses, and acne like a teenager’s was just a finish.

Remember: girls react primarily to your energy. And if you smell not like an alpha male, but like a loser, it’s clearly not acne that’s to blame.

Take care of yourself. Do you have speech impediments? Go to a speech therapist. Are you bothered by a rash on your face? Choose normal care products. No complex - no problem.

Negative experience . If you have the attitude “I’m afraid that the girl will refuse” and you don’t do anything about it, you’ve just stuck the man mode up your ass and will be waiting forever. Take failure not as an epic failure, but as an experience. Useful, by the way.

Well, she told you “you’re a schmuck, not a macho” - this is just an additional incentive to become better, to understand that your approach to women does not work. How long can you chew on this situation? Maybe... Or maybe, fucking not! Not the only pebble on the beach.

Read also: How to get a girl’s phone number correctly?

How to get a girl's affection

Change, work on yourself to gain the favor of your chosen one

Demonstrate your masculinity, strength, maturity, independence. Perhaps, looking at you from a new perspective, the girl will change her decision.

1. First of all, it is necessary to find out exactly why the girl refused. If you are able to somehow influence the young lady’s decision, make a clear plan, following which you will be able to get your chosen one.
2. Make new attempts to spend time together with your girl, for example, by inviting her to a cafe or on a picnic.
3. Try to make friends with her surroundings. If you manage to make a good impression on the friends of the young lady you like, perhaps they will be able to put in a good word for you.
4. Let the incident unfold gradually. After all, it is possible that over time the girl will awaken an interest in you, and even if you are currently in the friend zone, after some time you will be able to turn from a comrade into a beloved guy.
5. Engage in self-development, lead an active lifestyle. Perhaps these changes in your personality and appearance will interest the object of your adoration.
6. Sometimes, in order for the young lady to understand that she has made a mistake, you need to move away for a while, so that the girl feels how much she misses your presence, courtship, and expression of interest.

If you understand that you have a chance of success, then you need to be patient and gradually act towards your intended goal. If you understand that the girl is not interested in you at all, then it is better to retreat.

For what reasons does a girl refuse to date?

To deal with this problem, start playing by the girl’s rules. Tell your beloved that you understand her perfectly, talk to her very frankly. As a result, you will definitely find out the main reasons. They can be very diverse:

• The girl recently broke up with another man, and therefore cannot forget this relationship.
• The girl does not want to rush or rush into a new relationship.
• Your loved one considers you a good friend (for now).
• She is afraid of being disappointed in the relationship again.
• The girl simply does not want to date any man.

There can be many reasons for a girl to refuse.
Whatever answer you receive, think about it, check it if possible. Watch your beloved, talk to your friends and acquaintances, listen to what exactly other people are saying about the girl. Do not attack her right away, because there is a chance that the girl will actually want to start a relationship with you in the future, but this may happen a little later.

The girl just doesn't want to date any man

A girl may tell you that she doesn't want to be in a relationship at all. There can be 2 main scenarios here:

• She loves women (this happens, but very rarely).
• She is deceiving both you and herself.

The second reason is considered more preferable. If your beloved claims that she does not need a relationship, then she wants to appear in your eyes as an independent woman, very strong. Also, a girl can deceive you so that you suffer or she is simply harmful.

The girl doesn't want a relationship

If in such a situation the girl allows you to touch her, you are connected by kisses and intimate relations, then you could find a cat that loves solitude. This picture may suit many people. However, the complexity of the current situation lies in the following - such a lady, in addition to you, may have several admirers, like the famous empress.

Beloved cannot be in a relationship

Sometimes the phrase “I don’t want” becomes the phrase “I can’t.” In such a situation, there may be several reasons, for example, study, health, family problems, and so on.

As a rule, such an answer is considered just an excuse. Because even diligent students and very busy ladies give up their own affairs, devoting themselves to their loved one. But, if a lady blames everything solely on circumstances, then she definitely doesn’t need you, she just doesn’t want to hurt you.

This theory can also be true if significant circumstances are present. For example, a girl is much younger or poorer than you. In such a situation, of course, some kind of obstacle may arise in front of the relationship.

Own benefit

Often a girl claims that she does not want a relationship where the guy is only a “slave” for her. She only refuses to have a relationship with you for a while. However, you can still communicate with her, help with work or study, and so on.

Meetings can be just for profit

Perhaps the time will come and she will want to have a relationship, but it will not be you. You still continue to help her, but at the same time you are jealous. This effect is commonly called the “friend zone”. Don’t let this situation start, otherwise you won’t succeed in your personal life.

The problem is you

If you are faced with such a situation, do not scold your loved one. Look for the problem only in yourself. Maybe you weren’t able to prove yourself as a potential partner, you didn’t prove to the girl that you can be completely different.

Most likely you are a very complex or, on the contrary, simple person, and this turned the girl off. Sometimes women are put off by being too serious. Because not every lady dreams of a fast-paced serious relationship. Every lady dreams of romance, flirting and so on.

The problem may lie with your partner.

Pay your attention to what style of clothing the girl prefers, what she is interested in, what kind of character she has. Men often make many mistakes, and therefore ladies do not like them. As a result, they also wonder why the girl refuses the relationship.

Whatever the situation with you, try to carefully understand the problem, do not get angry and do not make hasty decisions. You just have to understand why exactly everything happened this way.

How to deal with rejection

Treat rejection as a new experience. Move on with your life

1. It is important to realize that the existing relationship was not really something serious for you. You will still meet your fate.
2. Treat what happened as a life experience.
3. Start devoting time to physical exercise. You can run, go to the gym, go swimming. Sport allows you to get rid of negativity and feel the hormones of happiness.
4. Don’t try to give up on yourself or criticize yourself for the refusal you received. It's time to love yourself, start respecting your personality.
5. You should not pursue your chosen one, belittling your dignity, begging for reciprocity.
6. Having received a refusal, there is no need to withdraw into yourself, to remain alone with yourself. It is better at such a time to communicate more with people, meet friends and make new acquaintances.
7. In a situation where a woman refuses, you can try to become her friend, not claiming anything more. In this case, you have two options for the development of events: either you will forever end up in the friend zone, or over time the girl will change her attitude towards you and realize that she wants more than just friendship.
8. Sometimes you have to accept that you are not dreaming about the person you really want. Perhaps you idealize your chosen one or these are fleeting feelings that will soon fade away. Try to let go of the situation. Realize that there are many other women out there who might be worth your attention.

What a guy needs to know: valuable tips

• While you are trying to get the attention of the lady who tells you “no”, you may miss out on another girl, more sincere, who really likes you.
• The more you talk about your feelings to a lady in the early stages of a relationship, the more desperate you seem from the outside. Believe me, such an attitude can frighten your beloved. Almost all ladies will refuse you, therefore, be a self-confident and self-sufficient person, this quality will only benefit your relationship.
• Never fool yourself. If a lady likes to walk with you, sit in cafes and cinemas, this does not mean that you have a close relationship. Very often ladies take advantage of men, but give nothing in return.

Look at the girl's behavior

• There are women who love to be surrounded by fans. Such ladies love attention, but they don’t need relationships at all. It's better not to waste your time on them.
• If a girl only wants to be friends with you, then she definitely doesn't want to date you. Look around. Perhaps you are surrounded by a lot of girls. You just need to find the one that is waiting for you.

Prohibited actions

It is important to understand that in certain situations, if you refuse, it makes sense to continue your attempts to get your chosen one. But sometimes it’s better to step back and stop interfering in her life. Next we will talk about what actions are unacceptable in such a situation.

1. Don't be too intrusive. You should not bother the girl, constantly call, follow her, look for random meetings, finding yourself in places where she often visits.
2. Don’t even think about showing your jealous attitude, showing aggression, or throwing tantrums towards the girl. If she didn’t already want to move on to a closer relationship, then after such behavior you will have no chance of getting her attention.
3. There is no need to try to arouse jealousy in the person you like, or to demonstratively flirt with another girl in front of her eyes, especially with her friend. This will not lead to anything good.
4. Never belittle your dignity, do not beg for love, do not threaten suicide if the girl refuses to be yours.
5. You should not put pressure on the girl by talking about your feelings, trying to evoke a feeling of pity.
6. The chosen one should not set conditions, demand that she decide to enter into a relationship, or blackmail her.

When thinking about what to do if a girl refuses, it is important to understand the reason that led to such a decision by her lover. If you have the power to change something, take action to achieve the desired relationship. If you can’t do this, for example, in a situation where a girl refuses because she’s in love with another guy, it’s better to retreat.

What to do if a girl refuses to date?

You need to calm down and not panic. Don't show her that you love her. Let her think that you are offering a relationship to just anyone. If she understands otherwise, then the chances will be less. After all (contrary to their words) ladies hate monogamous men.

You also need to understand whether you proposed dating correctly. Maybe it looked like “Hi, I'm Vasya. Let's kiss?". To achieve the affection of the opposite sex, you need to learn how to communicate with a girl. How to do this is written in this article.

Be sure to think and develop an action plan. Understand the reasons for her refusal and how to change her anger to mercy. At the same time, do not ask for advice from friends, girlfriends, her girlfriends, psychics, etc. Try to control the situation yourself.

Sequencing

If you are familiar with the phrase “the girl doesn’t want to date me,” then you can resort to the following sequence of steps.

1. It is necessary to determine the reason why you cannot build a relationship. We need to figure out why the girl refuses to date. Moreover, you must understand that not in all cases she herself will be able to admit these reasons. It is necessary to objectively assess the situation, look at yourself from the outside.
2. Set a goal for yourself, make a plan to achieve it. It is necessary for the girl to notice your determination and seriousness of intentions. Everyone around her should understand that you show signs of attention, look after her, and are not afraid to demonstrate your feelings.
3. You can try changing tactics. Go from an invitation to go to the cinema to singing under the window.