Loneliness of older people - reasons and how to overcome it

It’s scary to imagine how many lonely old people there are around us. Lonely, but with children and grandchildren - abandoned and even expelled from their apartments, they do not even dare to grumble about their lot. Someone goes to a nursing home and spends the rest of their life there. Others live out their lives alone in hunger and cold, without basic, normal care, etc., because... their relatives have no time for them. Still others, living with children or grandchildren, remain outcasts.

Why is this happening? What should we do, how should both lonely old people and those who indifferently watch how their elderly parents or grandparents eke out their existence? This article contains useful tips and conclusions from experts.

Parable about lonely old age

Having grown old, the father moved in with his son. The family, and he had a wife and a baby son, lived poorly. True, they accepted the old man. But what their life turned into after that is difficult to describe in words.

The old man saw poorly. He walked with an unsteady gait. And his hands were shaking. They were shaking so much that liquid food spilled out of a spoon, milk from a glass, and he could not bring the spoon to his mouth.

And these hands of his, these unhappy eyes during the meal, and the family always sat down to eat together, became a silent reproach for everyone. In a word, it was not food, but pure flour.

The adult family members are tired of all this. The son suggested this to his wife, saying, let’s come up with something, because it’s impossible to live like this. And the father litters, and drops food, and makes a lot of noise at the table.

So the couple fenced off a small table for him in the corner of the dining room. While the family was having a meal, eating the dishes with pleasure, the old man ate alone and shed a few tears. The food was served to him in a wooden bowl, because... he kept dropping the ceramic ones. And the spouses, not feeling sorry for him at all, also reproached him, saying that it was his own fault, if he had eaten more carefully, he would now be sitting with everyone else.

Their little son, silently observing all this, once struck his parents to the core. After the meal, the baby’s father saw him on the floor doing something with pieces of wood. When he asked what he was doing there, the boy replied that these were blanks for dishes for mom and dad. They want them to eat from these wooden bowls when he grows up.

Mother and father did not know what to say, they were choked with tears. But it seems that they knew what to do next, what to do. On the same day, the son, taking the old father by the hand, sat him down at the common table. The young woman helped her father-in-law eat carefully, wiping up food and liquid that fell out or poured out of his mouth.

That's how they ate with grandfather all together. And until the end of his life they never reproached him for a fallen spoon, or for spilled tea, or for a damaged tablecloth.

In a similar parable on this topic, a kid made a small pen, like his parents made for his grandfather, to separate him so that they too could live like this in their old age.

Well, there are many parables about lonely old age. As well as how we, if we want, can change something in our relationship with elderly parents. But this must be done while they are alive...

Loneliness starts in the head

It's not just childless old people who are lonely. In fact, there are a lot of them, and the reasons for this phenomenon may be different. Some older people consciously choose to live independently as long as their health allows it. They don’t want to move in with their children or grandchildren because they are used to their home and their own rules.

Loneliness begins in the head. A self-sufficient person with normal self-esteem will always find something to do with himself. In addition, nowadays almost all people have access to television and the Internet. Cities have communities and clubs for older people. Society provides many opportunities for communication and development.

But, unfortunately, over the years, many people unwittingly become energy vampires, and, unwittingly, are forced to feed on the energy of younger and healthier family members. Such old people constantly grumble and lecture, they are dissatisfied with everything, something constantly hurts them. Children and grandchildren are obliged to endure their whims and bad mood, but they also have their own problems.

In fact, it’s not that there’s no one around that’s scary. It's scary to live with people with whom you feel lonely at heart

If such a person is left at home alone, he understands that he has no one to draw his life force from, and this is where the “withdrawal” begins. But when a person has enough of his own spiritual energy, he willingly shares it with others, inspires those who are younger, and with his wisdom and endurance inspires love and respect.

Often the relationship between parents and children can deteriorate during the period of “role change,” that is, when the father and mother grow old. At first they looked after their young children, but then the children grew up and they had to take on parental status in relation to their elderly parents. They are used to their father and mother taking care of them and putting up with their antics, but now the opposite is happening: the parents have become big children, and the children have become their parents.

During the period of changing roles, it is important to show patience and respect for each other. Moreover, not only sons and daughters, but also people of the older generation should work on themselves. Illness or loss of strength is not a reason to deliberately complicate the life of younger family members.

Lonely old age how to live

When a person is young, he has no time to think about old age, about what it will be like. After all, everyone is sure that there will always be close, beloved people around him who will support him in difficult times, who he can consult with, who he can rely on.

But for the most part, everything turns out differently. Elderly people, due to various circumstances, remain as if thrown overboard and do not receive full care. Many people remain alone in their mature years, and everyone has their own reasons.

After retiring, a person dramatically changes his lifestyle. He has nowhere to rush. He's not busy anywhere. After all, the children grew up, moved away, started their own families. And in old age, as a rule, people experience many losses - a husband or wife, sisters, brothers dies... If anyone remains, they usually live in different cities.

No one could even imagine such a thing - lonely old age, how to live. So the old man is overcome by a wave of panic, depression, and suicidal thoughts. After all, no one needs a helpless sick person, sometimes even his loved ones.

How to overcome loneliness? How to avoid being lonely in old age? You need to think about this while you are young.

• If the marriage was happy, then the spouses will take care of each other until the end of their days. This means that from the first days we need to lay the foundation for this, becoming one spouse.
• It is important to build friendly relationships with children and relatives. After all, having harbored a grudge since childhood, sometimes children openly reject their father and mother.
• You must remain on good terms with neighbors, friends, and work colleagues.
• After retirement, it is important to remain active, even to the point of finding a feasible job.

Look for other tips on how to live in a lonely old age in the chapters of this article...

Loneliness in old age: normal or abnormal?

You should not think of loneliness in old age as a natural phenomenon. Despite the reasons described above, an elderly person can adapt to age-related changes. There are factors that prevent the onset of loneliness in old age. For example, the balance of the nervous system blocks the formation of mental disorders, reduces the number of negative age-related changes in the psyche and serves as the basis for calm communication between an elderly person and others.

A lot depends on public opinion about old people. For example, in the East it is customary to treat elders with respect - they are ancestors, they have more life experience, which makes them wise in the eyes of younger members of society. Everyone listens to their opinion and pays a lot of attention to communicating with them. Thanks to this, in eastern countries they have not even heard of such a problem as loneliness of elderly members of society.

However, maintaining contact with family is even more important, because this area of ​​life is a source of resources and support for an older person. It is very important for him to feel attention, warmth, love and care from his family. And it is not at all necessary to become a burden for them, which can be unpleasant for both parties. An elderly person can easily do simple household chores or look after a child. Firstly, this is a completely adequate activity for a given age and provides an opportunity for self-realization, as a result of which the grandmother or grandfather gains self-confidence and self-esteem. Secondly, he will be more actively involved in family affairs, which in itself is the basis for communication.

Thus, with imagination and ingenuity, the loneliness of older people ceases to be something inevitable for them. At the same time, a lot in this matter depends on what type of psychological aging a person is susceptible to. Psychologists describe several such options:

• “Grumpy” old age
  Surely you have encountered this type of elderly people - they criticize everything that surrounds them: relatives, the government, roads, clinics and even young mothers with strollers. The only one who has no flaws is the grump himself. And since he knows better than anyone how to live, he strives to share this knowledge with others, regardless of whether they want it or not. Young people are especially often targeted. Typically, this type of aging is observed in those who initially have a tendency to aggressive behavior, and in old age this trait intensifies. It's sad, but this is how these people assert themselves.
• “Unlucky” old age
  Such old people can be seen from afar: dull eyes, hunched back, shuffling gait. Speech constantly contains whining in one form or another. And all because these people are completely disappointed in life and in themselves, their self-perception comes down to the idea of ​​​​a lonely and sad loser. They constantly regret missed opportunities, cannot forgive their own mistakes, scolding and blaming themselves for failure. Memories of the dark periods of life do not leave their heads, and this makes such old people deeply unhappy people.
• “Family” old age
  Usually it is chosen by grandmothers. It is believed that the main purpose of a woman is to be the keeper of the home. After retirement, the grandmother turns to her family and takes on various chores: cooking, cleaning the apartment, gardening, caring for her grandchildren. Such things never end, so an elderly woman always feels needed and in demand. At the same time, there is an opinion that housekeeping is not true self-actualization, therefore the level of happiness in people with this type of aging is slightly lower than in the last two options, but more on that later.
• “Healthy” old age
  Since the life expectancy of the average man is much lower than that of a woman, he prefers to fight this and in retirement begins to actively take care of his health. Outwardly, such an old man is very active, plays various sports, adheres to some kind of healthy diet and loves to talk about these topics with supporters of this lifestyle. The most important thing is that anxiety about health does not become pathological and does not turn into hypochondria. It is thanks to such cases that clinics are full of people who harass doctors with their real and imaginary complaints (of the latter, naturally, there are more of them). Normally, such old people are quite satisfied with their lives.
• “Adaptive” old age
  Each of us is full of things to do and desires that for some reason he did not have time to bring to life. And now comes the long-awaited retirement, which involves a lot of free time. An elderly person develops vigorous activity aimed at his own well-being: if finances allow, he travels a lot, attends a lot of interesting clubs and master classes, and even goes to dances. Naturally, it is impossible to call such a life lonely, so the level of satisfaction in this type of old age is quite high.
• “Creative” old age
  Some people cannot “retire”: they work until the very last moment. The end of professional activity can be stressful for them, but they quickly find a replacement for it: public organizations, volunteer movements, political parties, mentoring - all these areas allow an elderly person to actively participate in life and be creative, passing on their experience and knowledge to young people. Some psychologists doubt that this option is good, suspecting those who choose it have bad family relationships. But such people never find themselves alone and are quite happy living their lives, and this is perhaps the main thing.

Psychological problems of old age

No person is exempt from the natural stage in life, aging. But along with physical old age, a person’s psychological state also changes. Experts highlight a number of features.

1. Retirement is characterized by a decrease in intelligence, a slowdown in thinking, a decrease in the desire to acquire new knowledge and skills, and a fear of everything new.

2. Narrowing of perception, deterioration of attention and memory, weakness. During this period, the elderly person “goes” into illness and ultimately receives psychosomatic treatment. His self-esteem drops. He constantly conflicts with his family.

3. An old person’s motor skills, like movements, slow down and become imprecise. Reactions fade.

4. During the aging period, the emotional sphere also changes - there is a decrease in adaptive capacity, denial of aging as a positive stage of life.

5. Life guidelines change. The emergence of a lot of free time, existing stereotypes about old age in society, and the lack of opportunity for fulfillment also negatively affect the emotional state of older people. As a result, the development of apathy, depression, alienation, grumpiness, resentment, etc.

6. There is a revision of values, an analysis of the losses of peers, a return to the past, and an escape from reality.

7. The intrapersonal crisis, which is the main psychological problem of old age, is a dead end for many and requires the attention and support of loved ones, and in some cases, psychological help.

Need to know

Such changes do not apply to people of retirement age who perceive old age adequately and as a given. They remain active socially and physically, find satisfaction in their lives, and continue to develop in this new phase of their lives.

Your life will become much easier.

As you get older, you have things you didn't have when you were younger. You have achieved respect, money, real friends and your own home. What else could be better? Of course love. If you have pure love, then you are an absolutely happy and wealthy person. All stress is a thing of the past, so you can relax and enjoy life. But you should know that all this requires many years of hard work.

Aging is not as terrible as you think. It is full of both advantages and disadvantages. Try to be optimistic and respect aging. Are you afraid of getting old?

Old age as a social problem of modern society

By moving into the category of older people, a person radically changes his relationship with society, value guidelines such as the meaning of life, happiness, good and evil, as well as his whole life, daily routine, etc.

Therefore, society must take the problems that concern the elderly seriously. By studying the causes of loneliness, we could help these people regain peace of mind and expand their social circle.

What is the reason why old age as a social problem in modern society remains relevant?

• Old people lose interest in many things and become more conservative and thrifty. They are not interested in work and usual things. They do not allow innovation into their lives. Society is essentially losing them.
• Old age also comes with personal changes. The character of an elderly person becomes unbearable. With such irritability and fearfulness, it is impossible to fully communicate with others.
• Alas, mental disorders are also typical for this age. Old people cannot remember information, their reaction speed is increasingly slower. What about those with Alzheimer's disease?
• The emotional state in old age changes, and as a result, connections are lost not only with society, but also with family. Here you cannot do without understanding the situation and even without psychological help.
• The death of a spouse or loved ones makes an old person even more withdrawn. For obvious reasons, he does not seek to make new connections.
• Upon retirement, a person also loses business connections.

Causes of loneliness in old age

As you have probably become clear, loneliness and old age are not synonymous. At the same time, we can observe the following picture: more and more older people call themselves lonely. This is due to various reasons, including age-related changes. Therefore, interest in the problem of loneliness in older people implies coverage of this issue. So, what is the root of all troubles?

• Reducing the number of things that interest a person
  If in adolescence and adulthood you were interested in the whole world, then in old age this circle narrows. As we have already written, older people are less active, more conservative and rigid, and do not tolerate changes and new events in life well. But all this is a source of vivid impressions and subsequently becomes a topic for communication!
• Personal changes
  It's no secret that the character of many old people becomes simply unbearable. In old age, various personality traits intensify: an irritable person explodes at any smallest reason, a pedantic person turns into a rare bore, and an anxious person stops leaving the house because of his numerous fears. Agree, this greatly complicates the prospects for communicating with people around you.
• Mental disorders
  The human psyche with age undergoes certain metamorphoses that are not pleasant. The so-called age-related changes include deterioration of memory, attention, perception, decreased speed of thinking and reaction time. There are cases when they go beyond the norm and become a mental disorder: Alzheimer's disease, all kinds of dementia and dementia, senile psychoses, etc. ... Of course, communicating with a mentally ill person becomes very problematic.
• Deterioration of connections with family
  The circle of feelings of an elderly person towards relatives narrows - his emotions become more polar, and intermediate shades disappear. Old grievances may be updated, which leads to a severance of contact with any of the relatives. It happens that the love of an elderly person is concentrated on one particular family member, for example, on a daughter or grandson, which leads to obsession in communication.
• The objective loss of communication partners is another factor influencing the loneliness of older people.
  The older a person gets, the greater the likelihood of facing the death of one of his friends or acquaintances. One way or another, this narrows the circle of contacts, and due to personal and mental changes, he is unable to make new acquaintances.
• Retirement
  Work for an adult is the main source of communication. Over many years of work, we get used to sharing with colleagues events in family life, impressions of travel, new activities, and spending holidays together. After retirement, the amount of communication decreases sharply, because you no longer meet these people every day.
• Specificity of communication
  Due to the reasons described above, the topics of conversations become unique. You probably noticed this when you found yourself surrounded by old women in transport or in a clinic: constant “sores” often find themselves in the center of attention. In addition, old people who have experienced many negative events in life often become embittered and offended by the whole world. Their speech clearly shows dissatisfaction with the modern way of life, complaints about the government and other negativism. Thinking about imminent death also does not increase the number of people who want to communicate with an elderly person.

The problem of old age in the world, how lonely old people live in the world

Scientists have called loneliness one of the main problems of this century. In our country, almost a quarter of old people live alone. What's going on in the world?

It turns out that the majority of lonely old people are in Europe. Psychologists say that this is caused by the way of life of Europeans, who prefer individualism and solitude. It is more pleasant for them to live separately from their parents, go to other countries, and change their usual social circle.

Yes, the authorities of these countries create programs to help lonely old people, but it is mainly limited to financial assistance and leisure activities. Old people are encouraged to participate in sports and creativity. Older Finns learn dancing, foreign languages, embroidery, and go to church for free. This is inaccessible only to frail old people and farmers.

But the fight against loneliness in the Baltic countries is political in nature. Here old people complain about the indifference of the authorities. And in general, they are divided into aborigines and Russians. The former are everywhere enrolled in various courses and classes, but the Russians are deprived - they suffer from injustice, they are not even entitled to pension supplements.

In the States and Europe, many elderly people live in nursing homes, where they escape loneliness. True, they have to pay for accommodation, food and entertainment from their wallet.

Abroad they often boast about the best care for the elderly. But scandals are increasingly breaking out in boarding schools for the elderly, during which inhumane treatment of frail pensioners is exposed.

Start doing something you haven't done before

The first thing you need to do to get rid of loneliness is to step into the unknown, go out to people, interact more with others. It can be difficult for old people to start life anew, get out of their comfort zone and get active, but if you are suffering within four walls, then it’s time to get an interesting activity or hobby. This will just allow you to establish new communication.

Leisure for a pensioner:

• cooking master classes;
• handicraft circle;
• horticultural society;
• walking with Nordic walking sticks;
• computer classes;
• cultural events that take place in the cultural center;
• visiting the library - often the organizers hold literary readings and exhibitions.

Even those who live with relatives can experience a feeling of loneliness if the latter work all the time and do not have time to communicate with their elderly parents. Talk to them, tell them about your problem. Perhaps together we will be able to find ways to solve it - for example, correspond in instant messengers Skype, WhatsApp and others. Then relatives will be able to be closer.

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Psychologist about lonely old age

Wherever an elderly person lives - whether in a family where no one needs him, or separately, he himself has to solve his problems. Is it possible to remain cheerful at this age, how not to fall into despondency, what to do? What does a psychologist say about lonely old age?

It turns out that it is more difficult for people of retirement age to cope with loneliness in a big city. Especially for those who are sick, whose sphere of interests has shrunk. It’s hard for men to bear this...

Locking themselves in their narrow little world, limited mainly by television, the old people try to protect themselves. And, as if forgetting about themselves, about their individuality, they even dress differently, walk differently, think differently, and avoid people.

But in small towns it’s easier. They live here as if in one family. Everything is in sight. They won’t let you get bored or sad.

Another point is that negative character traits worsen with age. Old people not only physically, but also emotionally and intellectually decline. After all, there is essentially nothing to do. And only a few retain a sharp mind into old age.

Psychologists say

From a young age, people need to think about old age, which usually comes unexpectedly. What will it be like - like a new stage or like a sad decline? It depends on you.

Marriage doesn't significantly increase your chances of avoiding a lonely old age.

The argument that a husband will help brighten up old age is shattered by divorce statistics. More than half of couples break up long before their first gray hair and last sex.

The very idea of ​​getting married once and for all still sounds attractive, especially since some people even succeed. But linking a free life with a lonely old age is a great exaggeration. On the contrary, the later you get married, the more likely it is that it will last until the end of your days.

Advice for lonely people

Pension and old age are not a death sentence. After all, everything could be different.

• First of all, you need to take care of your nutrition and health - old age should be healthy. Eat more fruits and vegetables, do not eat fast food, reduce exposure to chemicals, and visit doctors on time.
• Since social connections disappear in retirement, you need to take care of hobbies, hobbies for which you previously did not have enough time, and interests.
• It is advisable to train your intellect, learn new things, and be interested in everything.
• Strengthen your character. This means don’t grumble, be as friendly as possible and open.
• You should develop fine motor skills of your fingers - knitting, playing board games, designing, etc.
• Move more, be sure to monitor your physical fitness, for this, walk more, visit sections for the elderly.
• It’s also important not to lose communication. And not only with peers and, if possible, with young people, but also with your family.
• Since loneliness shortens life, we must try to benefit others, to be in demand - whether in the family, in society, at home, etc.
• Try to find something to do, even better if it is a joint activity with someone.
• Meet with your colleagues and friends - communication distracts you from thoughts of loneliness.
• Finally, find someone who needs help just like you!

Three main aspects in the fight against loneliness

• Attachment to a specific person.
  These could be grandchildren, children, or even just a close friend. Such relationships will make it easier to cope with feelings of loneliness and gradually come out of isolation. And if that person is not indifferent to an elderly relative, he will definitely help him find new friends and activities to his liking and thus finally overcome social loneliness.
• Active immersion in society.
  The more often and more an elderly person communicates (no matter with peers or young people), the less he thinks about loneliness and his problems, especially with health.
• Communication with animals.
  An alternative option for those who live alone and do not have the opportunity to often communicate with relatives or friends. In this case, he quickly “humanizes” his pet, shares his thoughts with him and gives him all his unspent love.

How to help a lonely person, lonely old people

Why do they need help? Because many of them simply have no one to help. But old age means illness, poverty, inability to take care of oneself, lack of attention, lack of communication, an inferiority complex.

The answer to the question of how and how to help a lonely person, lonely old people is very simple - not only in words, but also in real deeds. Here are just a few options for helping.

1. Go or visit them at their home or boarding house. These people feel abandoned, feeling loneliness and uselessness. Perhaps basic communication and care will be enough for someone.
2. Many people have not gone outside for years. Not to mention the theater, other activities and entertainment. Give old people the joy of communication, restore interest in life, for this you can simply take them to the cinema or the theater, do shopping together, visit friends and acquaintances.
3. You can make the necessary purchases for the elderly yourself, including medicines, care products, groceries, and even purchase some things.
4. Clean up the house of an elderly person, help celebrate a birthday or other important event.
5. Talk to relatives who do not visit their relative, convey to them the idea that they are needed.
6. Take part in collecting gifts for lonely old people, they also want to enjoy at least such a small miracle.
7. Make a donation to a charity if you don't have time to be involved in the life of a lonely elderly person.

Separately, it is necessary to say about how relatives should behave, although everything is already obvious about...

1. Call your elderly relatives and visit them more often.
2. Congratulate them on all holidays, as it was before.
3. Give them gifts, invite them to holidays, or come to them yourself.
4. Take them out into nature, to the theater, in a word, do what they enjoyed before.
5. Do not deprive them of communication with their grandchildren.
6. Try to make sure that old people don’t feel lonely, let them understand that they are needed and in demand.
7. You need to come to terms with the fact that old age changes not only a person physically, but also psychologically and intellectually.

Useful video: call your parents

How to deal with loneliness in older people?

Thus, it can be argued that a person himself is the architect of his own happiness. It is far from necessary to remain old and alone at the end of your life - you can continue to communicate with other people and contact the world under almost any circumstances. What do I need to do?

Activity

In order to avoid being lonely in old age, it is very important to stay active. How do most pensioners live in our country? They sit at home all day, and going to the clinic, store or sitting on a bench is considered something out of the ordinary. The person becomes passive, and the only way to get new experiences is to hope that someone will come and do something. And this, unfortunately, happens very rarely.

Therefore, it is very important to show interest and initiative in relation to your own activities - whatever they may be. It is impossible to meet new people and communicate only at home (unless, of course, you have guests) - in all other cases this is very likely. Especially when it comes to any group activities or clubs for seniors.

Creation

The concept of “creativity” is very broad, and we understand by it an opportunity for self-realization. This means that a person finds some interesting activity for himself that brings him positive emotions and does not allow him to wither away from boredom. An elderly person can practice his hobby at home, but it is much more productive and fun to do it in the company of fellow retirees.

And yet, what to do in old age? There can be a lot of answers to this question. First of all, it’s good to remember what you always wanted to do, but you didn’t have enough time. Surely every person has similar unfulfilled desires, for example, modeling pottery or landscape design. Or perhaps you have already done something interesting in your youth, and now it’s time to remember these things. Drawing, making crafts, photography - the modern world provides a lot of opportunities for self-realization, so you can choose any of them.

Intelligence

Your ability to communicate effectively can be severely limited if your thinking begins to lose its usual sharpness. And you will agree that it is much more interesting and pleasant to communicate with an intelligent person who has something to learn from. This is why it is so important to maintain intelligence and other cognitive abilities at the desired level.

To do this, exercise your mind: learn poems by heart, solve logical problems, train your attention. All these activities are not in vain - they help maintain the flexibility of thought processes, which delays the onset of old age. The ability to engage in intellectual work is also a plus. Look at scientists - among them there are much fewer people suffering from senile mental disorders, and many generally manage to maintain an adequate worldview until a very late age.

Character

Nobody wants to communicate with a grumbler or a curmudgeon. Unfortunately, sometimes a person himself does not notice his transformation into an unpleasant character. That is why you should not allow yourself to let loose and show others all the flaws of your character. What negative qualities become more and more powerful in old age?

• Grouchiness;
• Boring;
• Irritability;
• Greed;
• Bitterness;
• Egocentrism;

Monitor your behavior for the manifestation of these and similar character traits. Old age is not a universal license to behave as your soul pleases. More precisely, you can, but most likely it will make you a completely lonely person.

Respect

“Treat others the way you want to be treated,” many readers have probably heard about this wisdom. At the same time, we often swear at the people around us, condemn them and call them stupid and ignorant. In old age, this tendency intensifies, and now you are already swimming in an ocean of contempt for everyone else. It is important to stop in time, because attitude towards other people and self-esteem are inextricably linked. He who respects himself respects others. He will not allow humiliation towards him and will never stoop to this himself. And it is precisely such a person that people are drawn to.

Optimism

Our old people can be understood: the perestroika that happened in the nineties greatly undermined their ranks, and instead of the well-fed, stable future that they hoped for, they are forced to eke out a semi-beggarly existence. But even in these difficult conditions, someone manages to maintain an optimistic attitude.

Of course, it’s much easier to give up on everything and slide into pessimism. But this, as a rule, scares away the people around. Try to focus on the positive events that are taking place in your life. Even if something bad happens, it is important to understand that this is an inevitable law of existence, and a black stripe is certainly followed by a white one.

Self love

Have you noticed that you are drawn to confident and positive people? The secret is self-love. If a person does not pay attention to his needs and desires, does not develop his abilities, and in general has long given up on himself, what kind of interest on the part of others can we talk about? Therefore, even in old age (especially in old age!) We must not forget that you are also a person - with your own worldview, mood and needs. You should not sacrifice yourself to anything or anyone: grandchildren, children or household chores. Take time for yourself, pamper yourself - in general, do everything that younger people do.

We must not forget that we come into this world and leave alone. However, life itself is happy only if we share it with kindred souls. As a rule, they are family, friends and other close people. Therefore, the most important rule for those who do not want to remain lonely in old age is to value your family! And remember that youth is a state of mind. If you continue to be flexible and active, interesting and creative, then you will always be surrounded by positive people and you will avoid loneliness in old age.

How social workers help lonely elderly people

The duties of a social worker include providing various types of assistance to elderly wards. He must visit them at least 2 times a week. This is done either by agreement on a permanent basis or on a temporary basis (1-6 months).

Here is an approximate list of the main services that are provided free of charge by social assistance centers, of which there may be more, because a lot depends on a number of factors.

1. Purchasing and delivering food, medicines and non-food products. 2. Cooking, heating food and, if necessary, feeding. 3. Cleaning the apartment and, if necessary, assistance with repairs. 4. Assistance in obtaining legal services, handing over things for washing, repairs, etc., paying for utility services, obtaining a voucher for sanatorium-resort treatment, writing letters, buying newspapers, magazines, subscribing, etc. 5. Psychological support, conversations with the ward. 6. Delivery of an elderly person to medical institutions, cultural events, etc. 7. Monitoring the health status of an elderly person, first aid, simple medical procedures such as measuring pressure, temperature, etc.

Know

No one will offer you these and other services not listed in the list unless you apply for them yourself.

It’s better not to count on children either

Explaining the need to have children by procreation is no longer relevant. But the legend about the treasured glass of water is still alive, and after 25 years it is repeated to girls more and more insistently.

Having children as support, a guarantee of a comfortable old age, or entertainment is an extremely risky decision. How many kids grow up indifferent to their family, move to other cities and countries, or simply believe that they don’t owe anyone anything. If we think practically, a deposit in a bank is much more reliable.

It’s worth becoming a mother because you want it, you’re ready for it, you have something to share with a new person. All calculations that he will become a millionaire, fulfill your dream of becoming an actress, or simply always be a faithful assistant are a complete lottery.