How to cope with anxiety: 5 universal ways + techniques for specific life situations


Anxiety is a bad companion. How to cope with anxiety when it hits you at the most crucial moment? Nervous behavior is characteristic of people in different situations. Some people worry before an important performance, while others do not get out of this state at all. But there are simple exercises on how to overcome anxiety and get rid of fear, and we’ll talk about this in the article.

Reasons why we worry

There are actually few reasons for anxiety. They are all similar, since psychology claims that we have common psychological techniques of defense and emotions. Let's take a closer look at them.

  1. Fear is a natural defense. It's normal to be afraid of something new. If a person did not have such an emotional reaction, he would not live long. Fear allows us to prevent stupid things and threats to our lives. But sometimes it really bothers us, blocks our thoughts and actions. It is this kind of fear that sometimes appears on stage, in front of teachers, before a new event.
  2. Lack of self-confidence. Someone said a wonderful phrase: “Self-esteem is like stockings; it needs to be pulled up periodically.” Self-esteem is not always at its best. If we know that there is an “ideal” jury in the hall, smart examiners in the audience, and a lot of critics at the wedding - where can self-esteem restrain itself? That’s why “the hamstrings” begin to shake.
  3. Lack of experience. Excitement before speaking in public can be explained by a lack of experience and new emotions. It is not surprising that there is tremors in the arms and legs, sweating and a lump in the throat.
  4. Fear of error. Everyone makes mistakes, but this understanding comes only with age. That's why we are afraid before the exam, at a new job. In any situation where we will be assessed and commented on. The reason for this is partly a lack of education and school evaluation.
  5. Again, the instinct of self-preservation. Before visiting a doctor, we are overcome by anxiety and excessive excitement, which can be difficult to calm down. This is due to the fact that we are afraid for our lives. And someone is afraid to see an obstetrician, because not everyone likes to learn news that will change their whole life.

These are the main causes of panic and anxiety. But sometimes inner unrest arises, seemingly for no reason. In fact, psychology says that there is a reason for every worry. It’s just that we can understand and connect some things, but some things are incomprehensible to us. This is why it is important to understand why a certain situation affected us so much.

Depression

It begins to gradually develop after experiencing a traumatic, difficult situation or stress. Many factors and certain events can cause this condition. For example, this could be the loss of a loved one, a terrible illness, or a hormonal imbalance. Here are the signs: causeless excitement, anxiety, a feeling of indifference to everything, sadness, unsociability, problems concentrating, constant fatigue.

Universal ways to cope with anxiety

Some ways to combat anxiety will help you overcome fear and suppress anxiety in front of a new situation or the assessments of others, which can be easily done right before going on stage, taking an exam, or in anticipation of a big holiday.

Work on improving your self-esteem

No matter how trivial it may sound, it needs to be raised exactly in the area where you are passing. I advise you to read the article on how to increase self-esteem. If it's exam anxiety, try to learn the material. If you are very nervous before the wedding or sex, tell yourself that you are handsome (beautiful), and everything will work out for you. Self-hypnosis, you know, is a powerful thing!

Think positively

Imagine yourself (forgive the tautology) after a terrible event. How will you feel? What do you tell yourself? How will you relax? This is what will help you stop trembling with excitement and tune in to the upcoming event. Also try to learn to manage your emotions, this will help you a lot.

Accept the result

Often it is the result that frightens us, as described in the reasons for the excitement. So, changing your attitude towards him will help reduce your anxiety, and you will feel much happier. Thunder won't strike out of the blue, and an earthquake won't happen if you don't succeed. And you only need to endure the discomfort of failure for 10 minutes maximum, so don’t be timid!

Plan b

Most often, a person is afraid of the unknown in case the situation gets out of control. Therefore, practicing behavior in the event of force majeure, a hitch, or an error will help overcome anxiety and fear.

Rehearse

Before any performance, even before an interview, it is better to rehearse your behavior and phrases. You can arrive early to the place where you will compete and practice several times before the competition in the place where they will take place. It is known that speaking in front of a mirror significantly increases one's success in front of people. And also develop your speech, it will help your confidence.

2.From the psychology course

In psychology, they use a method called emotional acceleration; this exercise helps to keep anxiety under control. Imagine yourself as a destructive force, let it be a fire, a tsunami or an avalanche. Feel how this energy pulsates in your veins, imagine how you move and what destructive power you have. Hear the roar of a rushing avalanche and the sound of a raging tsunami, feel the fire in your chest and how this fire bursts out, causing everything around to light up. Visualize every detail. Exciting, isn't it?

This psychological technique is used to control anxiety, as well as to communicate confidently and relaxedly. The downside is that this method requires regular repetition, since we do not have a long action time.

Methods to overcome anxiety and fear for specific situations

It is very unpleasant when there is an event ahead that defines your life, and your pen falls out of your hands, your head is spinning, or your cheeks turn crimson red. And this is not so bad, it’s worse when thoughts are confused, and all efforts to get a prestigious job come to naught. So, how to quickly cope with your emotions and be “on top”?

Before the exam

In order not to get into trouble and not answer, as in the famous joke about fleas, with one answer to all 60 questions, it is important to prepare for this important day. Preparation should concern not only mental abilities, but also physically the body needs to be adjusted to stress, or rather, helped.


Exam anxiety

To do this: go to bed early, collect all the necessary items in the evening, have breakfast, choose clothes that are not too flashy, but neat and beautiful, do not be late.

Dealing with anxiety quickly:

  • mentally tune in to an excellent grade, think about the good;
  • if you are overcome by panic, tell yourself: “Stop!” – it should sound convincing;
  • share your emotions with “friends in misfortune”, oddly enough, this helps a lot - taking it alone is not an option at all!

If you're nervous about taking your driving test, that's a whole other issue! This exam scares everyone! You are not the first person and you will not be the last! There are several techniques to help you cope with fear and anxiety on your own before this control:

  1. Imagine yourself driving as an instructor, how you would behave, what you would say. This helps in the exam.
  2. Try to abstract yourself, that is, look at yourself as if from above. Whatever you do, how you drive the car, become an outside observer, then mistakes will not be perceived so much.
  3. Try to explain to yourself the instructor's emotions and tell him that you understand why he is nervous. This will reduce both your and his stress during the driving test. Developing emotional intelligence will help you deal with this situation more easily.

Work related situations

Looking for a new job, arriving on the first day at a new place is a real test for many people. Many people don’t know which team they will be part of, what awaits them at their new job, what kind of boss they will have and the scope of their responsibilities. It's no wonder that the first week of work feels like a year, and the responsibilities weigh on you at home.

But all adults had to go through such a test. To cope with stress and quickly adapt to new conditions, it is important to remember methods for overcoming anxiety at an interview or a new place of work.

So let's start with the interview. Naturally, you want to get into a company that interests you, so anxiety arises: “Will they take it or not?!”, “What impression will I make?” It’s not for nothing that “they greet you by their clothes, they see you off by their intelligence.” Arm yourself with this phrase and make the impression of a well-groomed person who knows his worth, who amazes not so much with his appearance as with his intelligence.

To avoid worry before and during the interview:

  • general advice is: “Become sociable in order to answer all tricky questions and show your creativity” - this is precisely the quality that attracts employers;
  • prepare for the interview: find out everything you can about the company, answer at home all kinds of interview questions that are usually asked in interviews;
  • be prepared for the fact that you, like the employer, are not perfect, honestly admit to yourself your shortcomings, but let the employer know that you are ready to learn new skills;
  • tune in to a philosophical attitude towards refusal, in the end, the light has not come down on this company, and you, such an intelligent and competent worker, will still find a job to your liking.

In addition to general tips, the following will help you quickly cope with anxiety: a glass of water (if your mouth is dry and your throat is dry), take 5 deep breaths, deliberately straighten your back and spread your shoulder blades - this pose tells the brain to tune in to confidence, make sure that your arms and legs were not locked - an open posture will set you in a positive mood.


Anxiety before an interview

You have passed the first stage of “torture”, you were told to go to work on Monday, what to do next? What to do with the oncoming panic?

  1. Explain to yourself: if you were hired, it means they need you, so drive away all negative thoughts about “I’ll be out of work,” “an odd one out in the team,” “one man in the field is not a warrior,” etc.
  2. On the first day of work, don’t cling to everyone you know, politely answer those who are interested in you, don’t intrude, but don’t be cold either.
  3. In order not to be overcome by anxiety, it is better to immediately find out what result of the day they want to see from you.
  4. “Tighten your self-esteem like stockings.” You should internally tune in to the fact that you, too, are not blind and will cope with the task.
  5. If you have any questions, do not hesitate to ask, but not the first person you meet, but your immediate superior. He should see the inquisitiveness of your mind, and not your inadequacy in a specific issue, so before contacting, study everything that is possible and what is not, and then only ask with reasoning.

It’s possible to cope with anxiety at work yourself, take a breath and “put everything in order,” the psyche will come to your aid, and the brain will tune in to the right decision.

Before visiting a doctor

Doctor's appointments often surprise us with not very good news and procedures. But if you are already determined to go to a specialist about your health, do not delay. Remember: your health is in your hands. And yet, how to remove fear?

  • Use elements of self-hypnosis: “I had such pain before, but everything turned out fine,” “I’ve already had a lot of injections, this time there will be fewer,” “If there is a bad diagnosis, I can cope with it,” and others.
  • If the anxiety does not go away, try doing breathing exercises: breathe deeply 5 times, then hold your breath, then repeat deep breaths again.
  • If possible, go out into the fresh air, it feels better there.
  • Tell the specialist your fears, talk them out, try to justify the arguments against them out loud yourself.

Before the wedding

Are you planning a wedding, but you are no longer happy about anything because of fear and excitement? The reasons for this fear are a separate topic in the article, but I would like to consider how to overcome this fear.

It is not for nothing that the tradition of holding hen and stag parties has long appeared. This is the desire of our ancestors to overcome the all-encompassing fear and excitement before a VERY important step - marriages were concluded for life. Therefore, have a great evening, “have a blast” within the limits of a decent one – I’m all for it too! This will be an effective unloading and dumping of all negativity.

And then it won’t be scary to flash in front of people all day – they were the organizers of that very hen/bachelor party.

Another way is to use the help of friends. If you really have a lump in your throat, chat with friends, laugh, laugh, accept congratulations, in general, distract yourself with everything you can. There is a known case when friends sent congratulations on social networks every 15 minutes, thereby distracting the bride from panic. Not a bad idea either!

Before sex

Here you need to understand whether this is the first time or just with a different partner. The reasons for fear will be different, so you need to deal with anxiety in different ways. Answer yourself the question: “What exactly are you afraid of?” What are you being used for? Fear of a man, because you are afraid that he, like the previous one, will leave you? Fear of the woman of your dreams due to doubts about your worth?

By answering these questions honestly, you will already have taken a step towards overcoming anxiety and worry. And then, as in the previous tips: we raise our self-esteem, give arguments in our favor, relax and distract ourselves with conversations, positive thoughts, well, maybe something stronger. But it’s better not to abuse the latter.

Breaking Bad…

In order to somehow cope with an unreasonable feeling of anxiety, a person usually chooses one of the most accessible ways:

  • someone “copes” with anxiety with the help of drugs, alcohol or nicotine;
  • others take the path of workaholics;
  • Some people suffering from causeless anxiety focus on their social position;
  • someone devotes their entire life to some scientific or religious idea;
  • some “muffle” anxiety with an overly busy and often promiscuous sex life.


It is easy to guess that each of these paths obviously leads to failure. Therefore, instead of ruining the lives of yourself and those around you, it is better to follow much more promising scenarios.

How to help your child overcome anxiety

Before final exams, parents are sometimes more worried than the graduate himself. Therefore, dear parents, leave him alone! Here's how you can help your child:

  • convince your child that no matter what score he gets, you will still love him very much;
  • repeat to him that he has a huge cart of possibilities, and some assessment cannot reduce them;
  • do not show your excitement and fear to your child;
  • try to provide him with your place for preparation, because good preparation is the key to successfully passing the exam.

How to deal with anxiety with training

Mastering your emotions in time is an art that needs to be learned. There is an excellent course “How to understand the hidden emotions of others and build effective communication.” It is useful for those who work with people, whose occupation is speaking in public, teaching or raising children, as well as those who want to begin self-improvement.

The course “Effective Communication” (short name) helps you become happy, influence your environment, learn to control your emotions and solve problems that others create for you. The intensive course is conducted by the famous experienced trainer Oleg Kalinichev.

Vikium offers a 7-day money back guarantee!

This investment in yourself will pay off very quickly, and you will become much more productive.

In any case, friends, you have several options on which way to go: you can improve yourself or buy a course for little money and achieve results as quickly as possible.

You can also find other training options on the Vikium website. Try it, it's free. In any case, there is a guarantee that you will improve yourself in the field of communication and relationships with people. There is a review article on our blog, read:

  • Brain simulators and courses Vikium - the most detailed and honest review of the online learning platform + reviews

Well, are we studying?

Affirmations

At any time, you can mentally repeat the phrases: “With every moment I am becoming calmer,” “Everything will happen (is happening) in the best way for me.” At the same time, there is no need to fantasize which one is the best. We may not even know about it! The main thing here is not just to memorize and automatically repeat affirmations, but to think about it, feel every word, and believe in the reality of the affirmation. Then she works wonders.

I wish you to find ways to harmonize your internal state that suit you. I also wish you faith in yourself, in your worth and in your ability to successfully solve all the tasks that life offers you.

Author Svetlana Nimak

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