From physics lessons we know that particles with different charges attract each other. The relationship between the male and female sexes is comparable to this phenomenon. There was a rapprochement; for some, it may have ended in marriage. But for some reason the particles begin to repel each other. And this is no longer physics. How to behave with a man so that he himself is drawn to a woman, psychology will help you figure this out.
Love, but don't choke!
Showing love to a man means not “pushing” him, not demanding every minute reports, constant attention and signs of love. Often this is the behavior that women who are afraid of being left alone are guilty of. They are frightened by the fear of loneliness and therefore, with their overprotection of their partner, they destroy all relationships.
In no case should you allow yourself and your partner to merge into a single whole in a relationship. Every woman should have her own personal space, an interesting, rich life, hobbies, and work. It is impossible to constantly put pressure on a man and at the same time maintain harmony in relationships with each other. It is always important to remain yourself, do not forget about small joys and individual hobbies.
Is it possible to increase self-esteem by improving your business skills?
Women often try to increase their self-esteem by developing their business skills. I'll explain with an example. The woman thinks: “I have low self-esteem, and this does not suit me. But I will work on myself, develop and become, for example, a master of sports in fitness! This will help me boost my confidence!” She achieves this goal and increases her self-confidence to some extent. But this does not affect her entire life. Being a great specialist, she can still remain the same unhappy woman who “for some reason has no luck” with men.
Many women live by this “achiever” pattern. They deservedly believe: “I have a good job/business, everything is working out, and this means that everything is fine with my self-esteem.” Yes. But if you are unhappy in your personal life, it is very important to understand that with business self-esteem and career achievements you do not fall asleep at night and do not wake up in the morning. Business self-esteem is not the self-esteem in the context of which you build relationships with the opposite sex.
As a rule, such women try to compensate for dislike of themselves with the help of another person. What do they think? “I’m now going to find a person who will see how great I am and will treat me better than anyone in my life! He will appreciate and respect me.” And at first, when a man is in love and enchanted, perhaps this will be the case. But sooner or later he will get tired of servicing other people’s injuries and being a savior. He will leave, and the woman will still not be able to understand what is wrong with her. And again he will go “to war” to win love.
When a woman does not have an understanding of her own worth, she begins to fight for love and demand too much from her chosen one. But normal relationships cannot exist in this format. After all, love is not about war, it is about harmony.
If you have recognized yourself and want to understand how to become the woman who is truly loved and appreciated, and how to learn to respect yourself in a relationship, I invite you to my free online course “Man: Honest Instructions.” Register using the link right now. The course starts every Monday and lasts several days.
Correct communication
Even if you feel that emotions are taking over you, the feeling of anger and resentment towards a man does not allow you to remain silent, then try to filter what you say. Insults, offensive words - a man will never forget all this, even if you are able to resolve the conflict soon.
Under no circumstances should you humiliate a man. Try to convey to your loved one what you feel at the moment. Tell us how angry, offended or upset you are, and most importantly, then voice the reason why you feel such feelings.
To show love for a man, you don’t need to blame him for all sins; when you start saying that the man is guilty of everything, and everything that happens is just his mistakes, then your partner immediately reacts with hostility to such behavior. Learn to calmly, and most importantly, correctly and delicately defend your positions, convey your point of view to your loved one without offense or accusation.
How does a man truly in love behave?
If a woman is in love, then it is immediately noticeable to everyone around her. It's not so simple with men. A man in love, especially at the initial stage, will carefully disguise his feelings. And if passions may boil inside him, then outwardly this may not manifest itself in any way.
You can't fool a girl's heart. There are some signs by which it is easy to determine whether a gentleman feels sympathy and how strong it is:
- the first thing that gives a man away is the way he looks at you;
- your partner agrees with you in everything;
- touches you often;
- lovers are characterized by unusual actions;
- desire to impress you.
A man in love will devour you with his eyes, watch all your movements, but as soon as you look at him, he will look away. He will agree with you in everything, every comment you make will be like a balm for his soul. A lover asks for your opinion and listens to it. Every event associated with you arouses interest and active participation.
He wants to touch you and cannot restrain these impulses. Your presence makes him happy: his eyes glow, a smile on his face, a good mood.
But as soon as the object of love disappears from sight, the young man’s mood deteriorates, this is accompanied by irritability and a nervous state. His imagination draws pictures that the lady of his heart might go to someone else.
If you are communicating with someone and you are not looking at him at that moment, he begins to produce some noise effects: he laughs loudly or coughs.
He catches your eye more and more often, for example, he suddenly appears in a store you go into, while pretending that this is an accident.
A person in love presents pleasant surprises, and they are truly unexpected for you. For this to work, he knows your preferences in advance.
When talking to you, he may pull the hair on the back of your head, thus relieving anxiety.
Well, a trick that lovers often resort to is asking them to tie a tie or remove a speck from their eye.
Some people shine with knowledge or make jokes, but there are also those who become very serious and even embarrassed.
Control over facial expressions and intonation
It’s not enough to learn to tell a man how you feel, it’s also important to do it in the right tone! To properly show love to a man, also watch your own facial expressions. After all, you can say absolutely correct and competent things, but at the same time purse your lips contemptuously, sigh convulsively, roll your eyes and pronounce all speeches in an irritated tone. This attitude towards a man cannot go unnoticed.
Often such relationships are rooted deep in childhood. At a subconscious level, attitudes are laid when a daughter adopts her mother’s behavior towards her father, and a son embodies the behavior of his own father towards his wife. Therefore, if there was an unfavorable relationship between your parents, this can be passed on to you. You will have to really work on this to change your facial expressions and voice timbre. But, everything is quite realistic, if you have the desire, then you will correct your own behavior for the better and be able to correctly express love to a man.
Ability to speak openly
To properly show love to a man, learn to talk openly and directly about your feelings, what you are experiencing and what you want. Men often simply do not understand women's long, florid conversations. If a woman is truly confident in herself, then she will not give hints, but will say directly what she wants and expects from her lover. Drop all complexes and attitudes that you cannot ask a man and accept help from him.
If you are married or in a long-term relationship with him, then it is quite normal to turn to your loved one with a request, voice it directly, without any hints. In most cases, men always go to meet their loved ones. But if your request is currently impossible, your partner will say so. In this case, there is no need to be offended and swear that you will never ask for anything again. It is likely that the man simply cannot fulfill the request right away. This is not a reason to be upset; a request from a beloved woman means to a man that she needs him and feels his importance in her life.
Where does self-esteem come from?
What does it mean to value yourself? There are misconceptions about what actions you need to do to be appreciated. Some people think that if you show others with your whole appearance how much you love yourself, or say phrases in front of the mirror like: “I am a goddess,” “I am cool, and everyone appreciates me,” this will somehow improve their self-esteem.
Others are sure that you need to strive by any means to receive confirmation of your worth from the man who is nearby. They begin to demand attention, compliments and gifts from him, believing that they thereby increase their importance in his eyes. In my opinion, such actions create the illusion of value. Let's figure out where self-esteem comes from? Of course, from childhood.
A child’s normal self-esteem is formed if the parents built a correct and comfortable relationship with him, in which important truths were conveyed to the child verbally and non-verbally: “You are our child. We see you, we listen to you, you are valuable to us. You are worthy and loved. Are you okay". Based on certain attitudes, the child develops an attitude towards himself.
But most of us heard the exact opposite as children. Why do you think? Because in their childhood, parents also did not hear words of support and did not feel their importance. And if a person does not value and love himself, it means that he does not have the resource to build harmonious relationships with his children.
And what happens? From not knowing how to behave correctly with a child, parents, without even realizing it, killed his self-esteem. When a child felt bad, he experienced negative emotions, perhaps cried - his parents could ignore him. When a child did something “wrong,” he was criticized: “You are behaving incorrectly, look at Sasha/Dasha/Masha! This is how it should be”, “Don’t stand out, be discreet”, “What’s wrong with you? It’s time to grow up and stop doing stupid things.” And now this child has grown up. With low self-esteem, with the awareness that something is wrong with him. He grew up and began to be surprised by the adult reality into which he found himself.
The ability to thank
More often than not, women take all their partner’s efforts in life together as a matter of course. It is very important for a man to hear that his efforts are appreciated.
For some reason, it is sometimes easier for many people to be profuse in gratitude to a stranger, but not to say anything to the closest and dearest person. Do not neglect simple, but such important words: “Thank you!”, “Thank you!”, “You are so great for doing this...”, say it from the bottom of your heart and soul. The spouse will be really pleased to hear this; in fact, by connecting his life with you, he remained an individual, and did not turn into a slave who is obliged to fulfill the slightest whim and desire.
We can’t take dirty linen in public
Leave your fights at home. In order to properly show love for a man, in any conversations with your mother and friends, it is important to learn not to talk about your chosen one in a negative way. Most often, ladies make passionate speeches and scold their partner when they are offended by him. Just learn to keep your mouth shut and endure this difficult moment, the anger will fade away and you won’t have to regret the bad words you said earlier. In addition, if difficult days really come in your relationship with your loved one, then your loved ones, instead of supporting you, will mention all the negative points you previously told.
Respect
Respect is the key to showing love to a man. The basis of all successful relationships is mutual respect for each other. Absolutely any person has certain good qualities for which he can undoubtedly be respected, it is important whether other people notice this or not.
What does it mean to respect the man you love? This is, first of all, to take into account his desires and respect the boundaries of personal space. Absolutely all men react very sharply to any external pressure; in this case, they show stubbornness and begin to behave directly opposite to women’s demands and desires.
A wise woman will not put pressure on a man; she will try to convey her desires to him in a delicate, respectful manner, and do this in such a way that her loved one makes the choice himself. Mental intimacy is created over a long period of time, but it is always based on mutual respect between two loving people.
Believe in a man
Every man has hidden potential, and his partner needs to see it in time. Some women simply don’t understand what could be good in this particular man, they leave him, and the new partner reveals completely new facets in the same person.
A man wants to see a happy and contented woman in his partner. If a girl constantly looks tired and irritated, then a man constantly receives the same information that he is bad, that he cannot cope and that his beloved is not feeling well with him. And what kind of man likes to feel constantly bad?
It happens that a woman specifically demonstrates her disdain, making it clear that she is dissatisfied with a man’s behavior, insufficient earnings and everything he does for the family.
Such female behavior does not motivate at all, but has the exact opposite effect on a man - he withdraws into himself, seeks support on the side, does not strive for something more, such behavior will not help show love for a man, but will rather ruin the relationship.
Maintain your individuality
Marilyn Atkinson, a famous psychologist and author of numerous books, claims that a happy couple should spend 12 hours a week together, and the rest of the time can be devoted to their interests, affairs, and hobbies.
A person’s passion for some business or personal development makes his life varied, complete, and allows him to preserve his individuality
A woman should not become a shadow of a man, and this will certainly happen if she forgets about her interests and gives up her affairs for his sake. It is important to be able to find a balance between relationships and your individuality .
Don't isolate yourself in your little world of relationships with your partner. Don’t leave your social circle for a man, because contact with other people develops us and allows us to gain new experiences.
Taking care of a man with pleasure
In order to properly show love to a man, it is important for a woman not to forget about herself! Self-care, clean and harmonious clothes, hobbies, beautiful appearance - many women do not neglect all this. And, as for ordinary household chores, this is where a glitch occurs. Washing, ironing, cooking, keeping the house clean - all this causes real negativity in women. Try to change your attitude towards what is happening, learn to enjoy everything you do for your comfortable life together!
Turn on your favorite tunes when you iron, buy beautiful dishes to make it a pleasure to cook and set the table. Listen to audiobooks while cleaning; in a word, combine business with pleasure! Make sure that household chores are easy and relaxed for you.
Selfishness or self-love?
I want you not to confuse two completely different concepts: selfishness and self-love. Selfishness is when a person thinks only about himself and his desires, without paying attention to others. And self-love is when a person initially thinks about himself, and then about others. How it works?
When a woman begins to pay attention to herself, take care of herself and invest her energy in herself, she has something to share with the world - she is in harmony with herself. And by devoting her life to someone else, a woman sacrifices herself and begins to “earn” self-love from this world.
I am categorically convinced that self-love and self-understanding have nothing to do with selfishness. Remember this please.
Listen and you will be heard
Listen to what the man is trying to convey to you. Don't ignore his stories about work and friends. When a man understands that he is really important to you not only as a breadwinner for the family, but as a loved one. Then he will listen with great pleasure to your desires and take into account your interests.
These simple but powerful 10 tips can take any relationship to a whole new level. Perhaps now is the time to realize your mistakes and understand what you need to work on so that family relationships improve. Now you can properly show love to a man and improve the quality of your relationship.
