Rumination - in psychology, this means the process of so-called mental chewing gum. If rumination in animals or children means the return of already chewed food to the oral cavity. In psychology, rumination is a thought that spins in a circle without completion. It does not lead to any productive decisions, does not lead to action. It just spins in a circle, coming back again and again, hooking on other equally useless thoughts. Thus, it takes away a lot of our strength and negatively affects our psychological state.
Where and why rumination occurs and how to stop it, we will look at today in this article.
Negative consequences of rumination
What's wrong with a repetitive thought? It prevents us from fully resting and generating productive thoughts. Usually, appearing before bedtime, it provokes an endless internal monologue, dialogue, argument with an imaginary interlocutor. We diligently prove to him, threaten, sort things out with him. Then the argument may subside, but we still continue to get stuck in repetitive thoughts and cannot free ourselves from them. We begin to think about how we could have done it differently, and what if I had done it this way instead of this way. What if I feel bad, what if there’s something wrong with me? When will all this end?
The state of anxiety accelerates. Someone jumps up, someone spins from side to side, someone may even involuntarily shout or whisper something, someone begins to breathe more often. You will not be able to fall asleep under the power of rumination.
Mental chewing gum can cover you even in the morning. So we open our eyes at 4 in the morning and first some insignificant thought arises, then through a chain of associations we again reach some disturbing situation, begin to exaggerate it and again fall into mental bubblegum. We wake up in the morning broken. A day with its stress and overload tires the nervous system even more. Unclosed questions are pressing, asking for a way out, but they are only given the chewing gum of thoughts. A vicious circle is created.
Resentment
People who are sensitive to everything and lack self-confidence usually get stuck in mental gum. Those who are afraid to enter into conflict due to their inability to stand up for themselves, express or defend their position. They are also afraid of offending or putting another person in an awkward position. But in these cases, the only ones who lose are themselves, endlessly replaying the situation in their heads or continuing to internally hate the offender.
Moreover, a threat or an apparent negative attitude towards them is not always such in reality. Sometimes it happens that the offense actually took place, but the one who inflicted it may not even understand it, did not do it intentionally, or, as he considered, made amends for his guilt with further good deeds.
But in the head of an upset person, that incident, those sensations continue to pulsate - this can last for years and even a lifetime. Such a person no longer notices the good done for him today; he always remains in his old resentment. And now the good deeds of the “offender” have long outweighed the bad one, but no - only that one is in memory. It’s like noticing only one burnt-out light bulb on a bright garland, focusing all your attention on it and not noticing the bright, burning lights.
In this case, the offended person is no better than the one who once offended him.
Where else lies the danger of such one-sided focusing - in the accumulation of aggression. Because no matter how you restrain it, the time will come for overflow and explosion. And usually this happens, again, not in the most attractive way. It seems that some little thing will happen - they will lightly step on your foot or make an insignificant remark, and it’s as if the devil breaks out of the person.
Then he will again lament to himself why he did this, and why he lost it so much, that they will think about him again, he should have somehow behaved more restrainedly, and in the end, why he is such a loser.
Over time, it becomes more difficult to communicate with such a person - emotional imbalance, inappropriate attacks, the same grievances can leave him completely alone.
Emotional stress
Rumination is also triggered when some emotional situation arises. This is how mental chewing begins when someone really pissed us off, but we remained silent or did not defend ourselves enough, we were overcome by a feeling of the injustice of what was happening.
And so, for example, again, most often before going to bed, we mentally go through the situation, voice out claims, prove how wrong our opponent was and how he dared to do this to us. This could be someone from work, our relative, or another person with whom we interact socially.
It seems we almost defeated him, but why is there no satisfaction in this? Because imagine, that person has been sleeping peacefully for a long time, not suspecting anything, and for some reason you are transferring a lot of your energy to him. Place a hose with a pump in your energy channel and pump. You are getting worse, he is getting better.
In the morning you wake up feeling as if you were actually fighting with someone all night. Sometimes even at first you don’t understand whether you are really in a quarrel with the person or not. You suddenly remember what you were thinking about before going to bed and, with some bewilderment, imagine what if you actually dumped it all on your interlocutor. He would probably think you were crazy. You begin to reproach yourself and the mental chewing continues ad infinitum.
Commitment
Rumination also occurs if you have made some kind of obligation or it was imposed on you, and you do not want or do not know how to fulfill it.
And instead of finding some kind of solution and either doing what you promised or refusing, you start thinking mentally about what a burden this obligation is for you. And why did you take it and how good it would be if you didn’t take it. Here - what if I can’t cope and I have endless thoughts about how to avoid this.
Because of this, difficulties in relationships may also arise, and a pessimistic attitude towards life will appear. The circle will begin to close again.
These are the negative consequences that rumination brings with it. The person seems to be thinking about the problem. But this is just an illusion. In fact, the problem is not being solved. In this way, rumination differs significantly from thoughts that lead to conclusions, to a specific decision. Mental chewing gum only takes away from this; a person hides behind it when he does not want or cannot, for various reasons, solve or close the problem that has arisen.
If the situation cannot be resolved, long-term depressive states may arise, falling into the position of a victim, passivity, with the thought that I am unable to influence the situation, nothing depends on me. But this is always false.
Yes, a person cannot control what other people do or think. But he can control it within himself. And chasing away thoughts about other people’s reactions over and over again makes no sense at all. Moreover, rumination is harmful. All the same, until the thought that torments us is completed, it will not recede.
What is mental chewing gum?
Mental gum is a thought that arises in the head and is difficult, and in some cases almost impossible, to get rid of. They are intrusive, appearing in the head regardless of a person’s desire.
These thoughts are groundless, arise on their own, and do not carry even a shred of rationality. Apart from nervous exhaustion, there are no consequences. They can spin in their heads for hours, i.e. they are as long-lasting as chewing gum. Oddly enough, this phenomenon affects both adults, children and teenagers equally.
For example, an unpleasant situation happened to you in a store or public transport, you were rude. It has already passed, but you suddenly begin to replay this situation in your thoughts. You imagine what might have happened if they had answered this way or that way. Or maybe you should have ignored this moment altogether and remained silent, then the outcome would have been completely different? Or maybe, on the contrary, you had to enter into conflict and defend your opinion to the end? What's better? What is the right way out of this situation?
The thing is that there is no “right” way. All that you can achieve by thinking about some situation, thing or person is simply nervous tension, fatigue and exhaustion. This is a real “mental chewing gum” that does not leave our heads at our request. She persistently returns and returns again. How to live with this? How to get rid of it? How to minimize negative emotions from this phenomenon?
How to stop rumination?
Fresh thoughts will not come to a head filled with fruitless thoughts. In psychology, rumination is the process of endlessly chewing on the same thought. Which usually signals general fatigue of the body. When the shift between work and rest is incorrectly organized. When there is no physical activity due to mental overload. Moreover, they are strong, to the point of sweat.
If you start to get stuck chewing on the same situation, it is important to think about whether you are capable of what you do in everyday life. Is the job or the person you live with right for you? Do you allow yourself to get enough sleep and what do you do before going to bed? Do you watch enough emotional videos? How big is the difference between what you do and what you say - where and in what way you deceive yourself.
When one thought flows into another, hooks another one, then comes back and, like in a mental stirrer, forms a mess and all of them are completely and individually meaningless, then you need to learn to track their appearance. As soon as you start to get into a mental mess, you say to yourself: oh, the chewing gum has gone again! Say stop. If you don't understand well, come up with a punishment. As soon as the fog appears from thoughts - on the floor, 50 push-ups.
You feel that you are starting to chew on the same thought - launch an elephant, then the elephant flies and the whole thought follows it, it returns again - another elephant. You can control your thoughts. The most important thing is to start noticing them.
If rumination overcomes you before going to bed, you can repeat it several times to yourself: I’ll just lie down for a while, I’ll just lie down and won’t sleep, or vice versa - sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep... Who is influenced more by what. This is how you disrupt the obsessive thought flow.
If rumination occurs against the background of a grudge against someone, then instead of mentally sorting things out, send mental flowers to the “offender.” Yes, choose the most beautiful bouquet. Imagine your interlocutor joyful and satisfied - he is on vacation or with good friends, he goes out onto the veranda with a mug of aromatic tea, he smiles. Wish him the greatest happiness on earth. He is warm and comfortable. This energy came to him and enriched you. He will feel calm and all the tension will seem to dissipate. You generated something good and prevented the thought stirrer from turning on.
If you are prone to accumulating aggression, although outwardly you create the impression of a dandelion, then stop suppressing it. But in the right way.
Aggression in the right dosage is your boundaries. Why is everyone wandering around at random across your borders? Put sentries there already. Use one of the energetically strong feelings - aggression, evenly. Distribute it by the sum of all activities during the day. In this case, it will not represent an inadequate breakdown, but confidence and determination in your actions. Become familiar with assertive behavior. Then you will be able to stand up for yourself in any situation, without the accumulation of negativity and subsequent rumination.
To get rid of rumination, find the courage to close all your unfinished situations (gestalts). If you can’t do it yourself, consult a psychologist. Remember and forgive all your offenders. Sometimes, simply by sharing in great detail or simply writing it out, putting the situation on paper and then reading it out loud, you can discover that the question was, in fact, trivial. And from that moment you will close it to yourself and stop painfully thinking about it.
It is important to understand that in some cases, when obsessive thoughts begin to control actions and guiding voices appear in the head, this can only be relieved with medication. Only a psychiatrist has the right to prescribe medications. Let's not bring ourselves to such states.
To structure thoughts, it is recommended to write them down not only when everything is already out of control. Thoughts get mixed up when there are many of them. You planned something, you want to do this and a little something else, then you forgot there, changed your mind here.
Write down what you want. For example, what do I need to do within a month: make an appointment, do a craft with the child, see what is fashionable this summer, do work for N., plant flowers, and so on. Rank things according to urgency and importance. Eliminate something as unnecessary, delegate something.
Be sure to include physical activity in your schedule - this is not cleaning the house, but squats, push-ups, intense dancing, so that all your muscles feel the physical activity. Especially if your work involves high mental stress. And you will fall asleep as a baby, without any chewing gum.
