2 1523 March 30, 2020 at 08:33 Author of the publication: Maya Levchuk
We are all geniuses. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its entire life thinking it is stupid.
Albert Einstein
I'm reading the sentence for the tenth time. I'm trying to figure it out, but I can't. The focus dissipates, the letters move to the side. There is emptiness in the brain.
What happens when the operating system malfunctions? The computer seems to be working, but it freezes. And it is impossible to do anything with it.
So, at 16 years old, I feel stupid.
What is laziness
Laziness is the lack of a person’s motivation to be active. This is a refusal of one’s own success and self-development, and satisfaction of current needs. Laziness may be based on:
- lack of motivation;
- unrealistic expectations;
- mental disorders and conditions (depression, apathy);
- mistakes in education;
- excessive demands on oneself or on the part of others;
- emotional burnout, fatigue;
- failure;
- individual psychological characteristics.
Laziness manifests itself in a person’s tendency to engage in passive activity (lying on the couch) or, conversely, to spend time actively but carefree. As a rule, laziness occurs only in studying, working, developing, but not walking, playing, or drinking. Thus, we can say that laziness is a lack of activity caused by the unformation of the system of needs and life goals.
Laziness is the psyche’s response to what it subconsciously considers a meaningless pastime. So, the basis of laziness and getting rid of it is working with the motivational-volitional sphere of the individual and worldview.
Interesting fact: there is an opinion that laziness is, in principle, characteristic of Russian people. Perhaps this is partly true if we compare us, for example, with the workaholic Japanese. We tend to celebrate on a grand scale. But on the other hand, if a Russian person needs something, he will achieve it at any cost. So, if we look at it from the perspective of motives, we can hardly be called a people with a weak will.
The origins of laziness
Laziness can be congenital or acquired. True, in the first case it would be more correct to say that we are talking about a congenital disability, that is, weakness of will, motives, needs, abilities at the level of neural reactions. Acquired laziness can have several roots:
- Suppression of activity by parents, that is, the so-called learned helplessness. This can result from excessive care, indulgence or suppression of the child.
- A psychotraumatic situation where laziness acts as a defense mechanism. For example, if a person does not have the competence to overcome some life problems, then he will avoid such situations.
- Laziness as a protest. “I won’t do anything” or “I won’t do anything until you…”.
- Laziness as attention-seeking.
- Loss of meaning in life. You can read more about this in my article “How to find the meaning of life if you don’t want anything - advice from a psychologist.”
- Society's orientation towards consumption and an idle lifestyle (advertising, media).
- Focus on the result (product), rather than on the process of achievement. For example, a student downloads an essay from the Internet, thereby achieving his goal, but fostering laziness.
Reasons for laziness
Laziness is being stuck in your comfort zone. What could justify your reluctance to move on?
- Conservative. Performing habitual activities that satisfy basic needs, but at the same time drive us into a routine and stop development.
- Fears, concerns, self-doubt.
- Intolerance, misunderstanding and at the same time awareness of the remoteness of the result. It seems to us that nothing around us is changing, and that’s why we give up what we started.
- Long forced rest. For example, after an illness. We all know how difficult it is to get into work mode.
- Doubts. For example, the principle of losing weight is simple: you need to burn more calories than you consume. But due to the delayed result and the prospect of long-term work, self-doubt creeps in about the result.
Signs of laziness
Laziness as a complex of weak personal characteristics and underdeveloped areas is manifested by the following phenomena:
- Lack of high social needs for self-development, work, activity, self-actualization.
- Weakness of will and self-regulation.
- Lack of desire for success and competition (“this will do”, “I don’t need anything else”, that is, a boring comfort zone).
- Inability to think broadly, to predict, to build connections in time (life one day and primitive desires, instincts).
- Complete indifference to external conditions and changes (“it doesn’t concern me”).
Did you think that laziness is the lack of energy to brush your teeth in the evening? No, this is just one of the petty manifestations of global processes of stagnation or personality degradation.
Why is laziness dangerous?
If laziness does not bother the person himself, then it does not annoy anyone except those around him. Although, of course, his personal development suffers. But if a person avoids something through laziness, and also understands that he does not have enough abilities to overcome a problem situation, intrapersonal conflict and nervous disorders may develop.
Awareness of your own laziness can affect self-esteem. Such people really need help, despite their negativism and stubbornness. After all, in reality, this is nothing more than fear of life’s circumstances and lack of confidence in one’s abilities.
Temporarily close escape routes.
If you just sit down at your computer and try to fully concentrate on your work for 5 or 20 minutes, without removing those things that you usually use to procrastinate , it will not lead to the desired result. So ask yourself: where do I usually run away instead of doing my work? For me, this is, for example, often my smartphone and checking social networks or a random Internet browser. So I put my phone on silent and leave it on the other side of the house when I'm working. By creating this small physical obstacle, I avoid the phone trap maybe 95% of the time.
If you:
- If you have this problem with games , move the irritant far away from you while you work.
- If you browse Facebook or other websites on your computer, block it for the time being using special programs.
- Watch TV - turn it off or stop watching TV completely.
What to do
First of all, it is important to understand that laziness is inherent in the human body. It is akin to a defense mechanism or sleep. When a person works to the limit, laziness can be a sign of overwork and burnout. So it is always important to maintain a work-rest schedule.
But laziness must be fought in any case. To overcome laziness you must have:
- perseverance;
- developed attention;
- formed worldview (personal stable belief system);
- hard work and responsibility.
And also be able to resist external influences and regularly increase psychological stability, master self-regulation techniques and learn to resist manipulation.
You can overcome laziness using your strengths:
- If you are a gambling person, then challenge yourself. Create a critical situation in which problems go from deferred to urgent.
- If you are a responsible person, then ask someone close to you to push you, make promises, sign you up for courses.
- Argue if you are susceptible to such influence.
In general, decide for yourself what can force you to act: carrot or stick, duty or creativity. Every person has strengths, even if they are lazy. Or, on the contrary, weak ones that will allow you to use them wisely. For example, you cannot refuse help, then ask your friends to invite you somewhere more often.
Opportunities, not obstacles
We need to change our perspective on life's difficulties. Let me remind you that laziness is often caused by fear, panic, and other primary reactions. Your task is to control these conditions, that is:
- objectively assess the situation;
- with the help of self-regulation, maintain a stable emotional background and relieve nervous tension;
- identify the advantages and merits of the current circumstances;
- ignore the experiences of other people (even if it limits them, but not you);
- see the prospects of the situation;
- navigate in the real moment (draw a single time thread);
- identify what can be controlled and monitor it.
“There is more laziness in the spirit than in the body,” said the French writer La Rochefoucauld. You, dear readers, probably have no idea how strong your body is and how much it can endure if not for your mind and distorted perception. That is why it is necessary to change your worldview. Fatigue, fears, failures are born in the brain.
What kind of thinking leads to success?
How do strong and successful people differ from unsuccessful ones? They are not lazy and look at the world completely differently:
- They always see the result and meaning of their actions. "For what? And just like that, for fun!” – not about them. But at the same time they give an account for every step they take.
- Patience, perseverance and energy are the basis of success. As a rule, knowledge, skills and abilities are easier to obtain.
- No retreats. It is only permissible to change the strategy to a more profitable one.
- There's no rush. It is important to know that everything is going according to your plan and you have an answer to everything, and time is of secondary importance.
- No worries about trifles. There will always be deviations from the plan, you need to be calm and mobile.
- You can't fall into despair. You can always correct the situation or your worldview. Nothing is decided until you agree to that ending.
- Constant movement. They stopped - they stopped personal development, or even began to degrade altogether.
Needs
Needs underlie action. Laziness arises from a lack of motivation, that is, insufficient expression of needs or their dissatisfaction. Although it seems to be unsatisfactory, it works. But no, a person with the mentality of a sloth will cry about how bad everything is, “interrupt” and “tramble” on the same level of needs. By the way, I would like to remind you of these levels (according to A. Maslow):
- Lower or physiological needs (sex, food, protection, breathing, safety).
- Need for reliability (health, stable income).
- Social needs (relationships with other people).
- The need for respect and self-esteem (prestige in the group, marriage, achievements at work).
- The need for self-realization and self-actualization (global contribution, heritage).
Action in its broadest sense is not possible without higher needs. But in order to achieve the highest, it is necessary to fully satisfy the previous needs. Find out where you are stuck. By the way, the higher the level of needs a person has, the more ready he is for action. This is such a vicious circle.
Actions
“There is no worse suffering than doing nothing,” wrote the publicist Alexander Ivanovich Herzen. Have you ever noticed how quickly time passes when you are busy? And what potential of the individual is revealed, what kind of power and strength is felt? In any business, the main thing is to start, and then everything will go much easier.
There will always be problems and difficulties. They cannot be ignored or avoided, but must be faced and addressed with dignity. What does it mean to act honorably and correctly?
- Be energetic.
- Be persistent.
- Have relentless persistence.
- Make a constant effort.
- Be pragmatic; see perspectives, but in the unity of time.
- Be able to develop strategies.
- Have resourcefulness and common sense.
- Take on opportunities that present themselves.
It makes no sense to wait for a push from the outside, for ideal life circumstances. You yourself create ideal conditions if you act. It's important to keep trying. If you try, you will in any case have a new experience, several options will appear. And if you don’t try, nothing will change.
- The action starts small. Read the book that everyone hasn't gotten around to. Talk to the person you're afraid of (or the topic itself confuses you). Sign up for courses and training to develop the competencies you lack. Keep taking action and moving. If you want something, then it should come true. Look for loopholes. They are always and everywhere, just sometimes disguised or broken down into small steps.
- Be systematic, consistent and persistent. Always remember your situations in which you were a winner. If nothing specific comes to mind, then imagine how a child learns to walk and read. How did you learn this? A banal but effective example. The child’s goal is to explore the world, run, touch, grab, move, develop. He falls, but moves forward with crazy persistence. I agree that it is more difficult to overcome problems on a mental level, but in essence it is the same.
- Action is impossible without resistance. There will always be external unfavorable factors, people, conditions, but that’s the beauty of it. This is the interest and test of you as a person. Development of you as a person. We all know the phrase “He who does nothing makes no mistakes,” so mistakes cannot be avoided. But think again: everything that is common and personal in the world is based on someone’s mistakes. The ability to make decisions and take responsibility for them is a trait of an adult, mature personality.
- Make it a rule to finish what you start. Whatever it is. This is the only way to cultivate will, perseverance, motivation, and goal orientation.
- Keep the outcome in mind, but also be process-oriented. That is, focus on actions in the present.
- Plan alternative courses of action in case of failure and do not rule out failure. Don't rule it out, but don't expect it! It's a big difference.
Will
What is will? This is the ability to be resilient to changes in the world. Assess why and how obstacles are built into our lives. This is preserving your inner world, cultivating your confidence and perseverance. How to develop will and what it means to be strong-willed:
- Think positively, but always be prepared for the situation to worsen.
- Have the courage to accept what does not depend on us and what we cannot change (bad weather, the death of someone close to us).
- Be realistic, especially in expectations. It’s useful to dream (“if only we could fly”), but you need to plan feasible things.
- Accept the life changes that occur. You are unique, as is your destiny. But remember that in many ways you determine it.
- Protect your inner world, values and beliefs. No matter what happens, you must maintain your core.
- Focus on high needs (self-actualization, development, creativity). Dedicate yourself to what is above the earthly, above the biological.
- Remind yourself that we are all mortal (this is if it has become completely scary or passivity has overcome us again).
- Be prepared to go through these steps over and over again.
Body
Volitional effort causes neuropsychic tension. The moral, mental and physical forces of the individual are activated.
Have you noticed that successful people are active in everything and also look great in appearance? The body is the carrier of your mind and soul. Everything should be in harmony. Appearance is a reflection of the inner world (scientific fact).
Take care of yourself. Don't look for excuses. Even if you look good, go in for sports. Start small again - twenty-minute exercises. There is no limit to perfection, there is no limit to the development of willpower. In addition, sports have a positive effect on brain activity. There is no other option but to force yourself. There is no other way to overcome laziness.
Success in life, activity, content and beautiful appearance are not coincidences. These are interconnected components of one system. In addition, you must be sure that your body will not let you down when achieving your main goal.
Quick Guide
Thus, to overcome laziness it is important:
- to feel desire;
- evaluate its realism (possibility of implementation);
- draw up an action plan;
- assume all possible consequences (advantages and disadvantages);
- find resources inside and outside to fulfill your desire;
- make your wish come true.
It is also important to always set yourself clear deadlines and highlight stages in your activities. This is the only way you can achieve your goals.
How to find and check a target
Goal setting is the basis for getting rid of laziness and taking action. You can find the target using the following plan:
- Answer the question “Why do I need this?”
- Understand your interests. It is important that the activity at least partially corresponds to them.
- Find out your abilities, analyze your resources. Think if you lack something, whether you can develop it. And if so, where and how.
- A goal is a point of contact between motives, interests and resources. Think about what it could be.
- Formulate and write down your goal. For example, “graduate from music school and become a pianist.”
Now it's important to check if you made a mistake. To do this, imagine that the goal has been achieved and honestly answer the questions below.
- Have you betrayed yourself? Is your soul in place?
- Did you lose your health on the way to your goal?
- Have you become lonely?
- Have you lost your freedom?
- Have you realized your potential?
It is important to focus on your priorities, that is, life values. Remember that no activity will bring you satisfaction if you come into conflict with your own worldview. This is exactly how laziness, passivity, depression, and internal fragmentation are born.
Unload your life.
When your life is too hectic and overloaded, you may switch off and lazily lie on the couch just watching TV or your smartphone.
If this is the case, then start unloading both your work time and your personal time. Two questions that helped me do this and figure out what is most important:
- What would I work on if I only had 2 hours to work today?
- If I only had 1 hour of free time today, how would I spend it?
Use these questions to get out of old ruts, question your typical day a little, and find your top priorities .
Then see what you can eliminate, minimize, or perhaps delegate things that are not as important or have low priority.
Results
Perhaps laziness is called the engine of progress because its awareness gives a “magic kick” to a person? He begins to work on himself with even greater persistence.
In any case, if laziness bothers you, then you need to get rid of it. I recommend remembering a few basic positions for work:
- Love yourself and life. Find the meaning of life.
- Be socially active.
- Wish, dream, create.
- Take the phrase “here and now” as a principle. Don't put anything off until later if you have every opportunity to do it now.
- Trust yourself and people.
- Plan your life.
How to stop being lazy and start taking action? Just start taking action. Through “I don’t want”, through “I can’t” I force myself. Athletes return to professional sports after serious injuries, people lose a hundred or more kilograms of weight, but what is holding you back? Find sustainable motivation, a goal and a set of tasks to achieve it.
- At the same time, develop the will that will allow you to resist any external and internal troubles and regulate your behavior. Will is based on motives.
- Motives, like needs, shape personality traits over time. That’s why it’s so important to have your own system of values and needs and focus on high goals. It's about finding your meaning for the world, that is, the meaning of life.
- Why are you lazy? Maybe you yourself don’t know your potential, abilities, interests - get diagnosed. Or someone is suppressing your potential - get out from under the influence.
- The main types of activities include work, education, play, social, and communication. Choose the one that is closer to you in terms of age or priorities. But you should not give preference to the game, if we are not talking about a creative profession or professional sports, family life (social roles also relate to gaming activities).
- Next, set a goal within this activity, for example, to obtain a higher education. Think about what this goal is for you. It’s good if you say that knowledge and further work (self-realization) are important. Now select the means and move towards your goal.
In fact, everything is very simple. Of course, you can ask someone to beat you with a stick, but in the end, only you lift yourself up, change and act. Remember that laziness is a sign of internal dissatisfaction. Ask yourself, what are you doing wrong? What do you really want?
I’ll give you the simplest example: you’re not too lazy to eat when you’re hungry. Why? Because you really want it. But sometimes I’m too lazy to go to college. Why? Because you don’t see the meaning, goals, prospects, interests. Everything is very simple.
Let me remind you of a thought you probably already know: “sow a thought, you will reap an action; sow an action, you will reap a habit; sow a habit, you will reap a character; sow a character, you will reap a destiny.” So start thinking that you can do anything! And decide what you want now and why you need it. And then stop being lazy and start moving towards your goal.
Anton Grigorievich Rubinstein in his theory expressed the idea that a person and his psyche are formed, developed and manifested only in activity. So in the question “How to stop being lazy and start taking action?” There is already an answer: stop being lazy and start acting.
Inattention in conversation
Thus, a person who does not know how to listen and hear his interlocutor may be considered stupid. In a conversation, such an individual concentrates exclusively on his own feelings and thoughts and pays almost no attention to the state of the other person. As a result, he seems as stubborn as a ram, and in many cases this leads to the conclusion that he is immeasurably stupid.
The problem here may lie in banal undeveloped empathy - the ability to feel another, in the inability to conduct a meaningful conversation. It's not that hard to learn actually.
Literature on the topic
In conclusion, I recommend books on the topic.
- R. Holiday “How strong people solve problems.” I have already taken her supporting theses for my work, but I think it will be useful for you to read the original source.
- S. Zanin “How to overcome laziness, or how to learn to do what needs to be done?” This is an interesting work, written in everyday language. The phenomenon of laziness is analyzed from the perspective of everyday life, and practical recommendations for overcoming it are given. Separately, information is presented on the topics of fitness, smoking, waking up early, and learning a foreign language. As you understand, we are talking about how to get rid of unwanted habits and phenomena, and how to overcome laziness and cultivate the desired attitudes.
- N. Faibyshenko “Realize. To want. Find: from dream to reality one step." The name speaks for itself. The book describes in simple language the peculiarities of human life. Needs, motives, actions, goals, the specifics of their construction and much more are analyzed. Perhaps this is the work to start working on your worldview.