Where does fear come from?
In this article you will learn:
Fear is perhaps one of the most unpleasant emotions we experience. In the wild, it was certainly useful for humans, as it forced them to be careful in order to stay alive. In our modern world, the reasons to be trampled by a mammoth are reduced to a minimum, but fear as an emotion has not gone away at all.
Moreover, with the development of human thinking abilities, fear has become so multifaceted that psychologists these days always have enough work.
In this article I will not touch on phobias, the root causes of which can be buried in very deep layers of human life; in order to extract them and transform them properly, a competent and hardworking psychologist is needed.
Let's talk about the everyday fears of life . They are the ones that lie like a heavy stone on your heart, driving you into a sticky feeling of helplessness and defenselessness. Let's talk about their true causes and ways to eliminate them.
Top 15 disposal methods
1. Map of fears
In an article about energy vampires, he talked about the benefits of creativity. It helps not only to get rid of accumulated and destructive energy, but also to realize something, to find contact with your subconscious. Therefore, in order to learn to monitor the appearance of the first signs of fear, at the moment as soon as anxiety arises, in order not to bring matters to panic, when it is almost impossible to control yourself on your own, you need to draw a map of your experiences.
To do this, draw a human figure and put marks in those areas in which you feel changes when you are afraid. What is happening to you at this moment? Feeling dizzy? Are you sweating? Is your heart rate racing? Are your legs ready to run, or vice versa, as if they are growing to the floor? Write down absolutely all the signs, then think, remember which ones appear first, which are the most difficult to cope with? Such careful study will help you manage your condition in the future.
2. “Be afraid”
Psychology has adopted one effective method, observed in living nature. When, for example, a jaguar is chasing a roe deer, but for some reason gets distracted, and the potential victim has the opportunity to escape, the very first thing it does after it is safe is to start shaking very, very strongly. She doesn't understand anything about psychotherapy, but instinctively feels that she needs it. “Be afraid”, increasing the tension in the muscles so that it leaves the body and again go to the clearing to pluck the grass.
Therefore, try to sit comfortably and begin to tremble, shake your limbs so that you throw up, then you will not develop illogical fears and diseases against the background of the stress you have experienced. And also with the help of this technique you can help your loved ones by hugging them from behind and helping them sway.
3.Picture of fear
Again, take a sheet of paper and pencils, you will draw, only with a slightly different goal - you need to separate your fear from yourself and destroy it. Therefore, give free rein to your imagination, depict it the way you want. Then take the sheet and feel that now it is in your hands, now you control it and decide what to do. Then tear it, burn it, trample under your feet, in general, do everything to destroy it, feeling how it becomes easier.
4.Meditation
Meditation will help you bring balance and balance back into your life. With its help, you will relax your body, strengthen your spirit and remain calm in any situation. Look at this article, it describes in detail techniques that even beginners can repeat.
5. “Desensitization and processing by eye movements”
The famous “psychologist”, Francine Shapiro, figured out how to overcome anxiety. It is worth sitting comfortably against the wall and choosing two extreme points, left and right, which you can look at, moving your eyes so that your head does not turn. Then you should think about what really frightens you, replaying the situation in the smallest detail in your head and constantly moving your eyes. Choose a pace that is comfortable for you, the main thing is to do at least 24 movements in one direction. Then take a break, after which you complete another cycle. This therapy should last 10 days, after which you will notice that your anxiety level has decreased significantly.
6. “Look fear in the eyes”
Whatever resistance may arise, it is necessary to overcome it, that is, try to “look into the eyes” of your experiences. This is difficult, it will be better if you enlist the support of your loved ones. Understand that the past experience is in the past, and it will not necessarily happen again; try to test your fears for reality.
I don’t encourage you to overcome panic and climb into a terrarium with snakes if they cause horror, no, just dare to go to the zoo, take a closer look at them, read literature to find out their habitat and other details. The more information you have, the less room for imagination there will be.
7. Advance in development
It will help to heal by realizing that worry and anxiety are stopped curiosity. For example, a person who is terribly afraid of sharks, and even does not swim deep in a river, knows by heart all the films about them. Because it attracts and frightens at the same time, because it delights, fascinates and at the same time evokes a feeling of disgust or horror.
And some choose to follow their interests while maintaining safety, while others begin to be afraid of water, not even giving themselves the opportunity to relax in the bathroom.
Look at the article about intrusive thoughts , it describes ways that will help you control painful thoughts that haunt you.
8.Sport
Fear itself contains a lot of energy, so find ways to waste it so that its excess does not cause harm. Active physical training, swimming, and especially aggressive sports, for example, shooting, boxing or martial arts will do an excellent job of this function.
9. "Benefit"
In addition to understanding the cause of horror, it is also important to understand the benefits of its occurrence. Yes, every habit we have, even destructive ones, has a secondary benefit, and if you recognize it, it will lose its power over you.
This is usually used to treat smoking addiction. As soon as a person recognizes a need that is satisfied during a smoke break, he has the opportunity to come up with a more gentle way to satisfy it.
In the same way, with anxiety, answer yourself the question, just be honest, you need this, first of all: “What do I get thanks to my phobia?” Some bask in attention, others do not have to take responsibility for any part of their lives, and still others punish themselves for some mistakes. What's happening to you?
10. "Immersion"
There are such radical methods as deliberately immersing yourself in a state of horror and intensifying it. Yes, it already sounds terrible, but it works, and you know how? If you devote time to this process every day, then after a couple of weeks, in the place where the panic arose, boredom will begin to appear, because the energy level will begin to fall, and, accordingly, interest too.
11. Breathing techniques
Most often, obsessive states and phobias appear as a result of conflicts, traumas and difficulties; the psyche cannot withstand the stress and fails. From this, a person begins to experience panic attacks, during which he is already suffocating from anxiety and excitement. Therefore, it is very important to be able to relax, and the best way to do this is with the help of breathing techniques. I have described the various methods in detail in this article.
12.Society
Find communities of people on the Internet with the same experiences as yours; understanding that you are not the only one makes the situation a little easier. You can support each other, share advice and life stories. It's easier to cope together.
13.Observation
Next time, as soon as you experience a panic attack, concentrate and try to observe yourself and your feelings as if from the outside, to isolate yourself from what is happening. This technique will help you pull yourself together and calm down.
14. "Brainstorm"
Write down absolutely all the thoughts that arise when you remember the subject of your phobia. This way the subconscious will connect, you will “discharge” a little, and, perhaps, you will become aware of some nuances that will help you cope with your “tormentor” in the future. You can read more about this technique here.
15. Auto training
Check out the article at this link. Because auto-training helps in such cases, besides, with its help you will increase your self-esteem and become more confident.
Where do fears come from?
Fear is, first of all, a loss of connection with God , so the youngest children are not afraid of anything, they boldly go towards everything new.
Yes, sometimes recklessly, out of ignorance, but this is also why loving parents exist - to protect and gently guide in time. Now let’s remember whose children we are all and in whose caring, attentive palms we are every second. Of course, if we believe in their existence. No one has canceled free will, and if we choose not to believe in the support and care of higher powers, then so be it. Sad, but voila.
How to get rid of fears and anxiety? Thoughts that cause fear, constantly scrolling through your head, literally attract situations that give rise to repeated fears. Fear is a very aggressive emotion and it contributes to the fact that a person gradually ceases to trust people, circumstances, and simply isolates himself from life. Is it worth talking about what events such a person receives from life in response according to the law of reflection...
Fear
The psychologists who spoke to the RIA Voronezh correspondent agreed that scammers try to instill fear in a person from the first minutes: the “client” can supposedly lose money if he doesn’t do something.
– And at this moment the scammer’s attention is guaranteed and no one will hang up the phone dissatisfied. At the same time, a person usually focuses more on the goal of not losing money, and not on meticulously listening to all the opponent’s phrases, stated Marina Shcherbakova.
Psychologist Yuri Zemtsov noted that finances are what gives us a sense of security:
– On the recording provided to the editor, one can hear a desire to evoke strong emotions (fear, anxiety) through a message about financial transactions and an attempt to change the phone number. If you provoke a person to strong emotions, then his ability to think logically decreases, and the likelihood of mistakes and impulsive actions increases.
Fear and its reflection on the physical body
Moreover, if fear is the main emotion experienced, then it keeps you in constant tension, and this cannot but affect the health of the body.
Vessels and muscles tense and contract excessively. This constant tension can create weakened immunity, hypertension, ulcers, and many other troubles. We can also talk about baldness, since the hypertonicity of compressed blood vessels, blocking the access of nutrients to the hair follicles, is precisely provoked by the emotion of fear.
By the way, if baldness runs in the family and is transmitted through the male line, then with a high degree of probability it can be argued that the fear program is strong in the family and there is an ancestor who experienced some terrible event in his life and with these experiences triggered the karmic program. Identifying and closing such programs gives very effective results.
But just like that and say to yourself: “Don’t be afraid, you fool?” and immediately stop being afraid after that, this only happens with outstanding individuals. Everyone else needs to know one more thing in order to transform fear in themselves.
Write your fears
Transfer your worries to a piece of paper and let your worries come out. While anxiety is locked inside, your thoughts may be confused and you won't have a clear idea of what exactly you're nervous about.
By putting your worst thoughts on paper, you will understand what exactly you are worried about. Write down the worst and scariest possible future.
Now in front of you is exactly what does not allow you to live in peace. And now is the time to find out whether this future depends on you.
How to get rid of fear?
How to get rid of fears and anxiety? I don’t like to use the word “win” in this context; it means that we need to fight, but I don’t want that at all. I want it to be quiet and peaceful, with a smile and of itself, as if it was there.
And this “something about fear” consists precisely in the fact (attention, sit down!) that what you are afraid of, you actually want! So what do you think? Surely some part of the reading audience has now slammed the tab with the article with a frown, saying: “What a heresy! I wish! How can you even want THIS?!” So I will continue the explanations for the puzzled but curious. Yes this is true.
The fear of some event is actually our hidden desire for this event to happen. But this is an inverted fear. What is desired is not the event directly, but the achievement of the positive intention that it leads to.
How to use your fear
CONTENTS (introduction) | |
What is a person? | Search for the ideal |
What is the soul? | Self-realization |
Is there such a thing as rebirth? | Shaping events |
Our soul's goals | Conditions for implementing an idea |
Shaping Destiny | A different look at mistakes |
Relationship between people | How to use your fear |
Reasons for loneliness | Neutralization of negative programs |
Relationship problems | Where do diseases come from? |
Every person has many fears that prevent him from expressing himself in one or another area of life.
Fear is a negative emotion that inhibits the release of energy and prevents a person from taking the necessary steps for further development. This is what a person thinks. And fear, first of all, arises as an instinct of self-preservation. Everything new and unknown is scary and dangerous. And in this state, all our senses, reaction, speed, and brain activity are activated and sharpened. Fear is a reaction to a life-threatening situation occurring at the moment. It is present in the subconscious, forcing a person to constantly be on edge, expecting an attack. Internal fear forces a person to adapt to situations, manage and manipulate others to ensure his own safety. A person controlled by fear cannot be open to the world. His actions, desires, thoughts are always motivated by personal egoism, even if outwardly they look decent. The spread of fear is due to the fact that the vast majority of people are emotional.
In fact, fear is not in external things, but inside a person. One is afraid of the dark, the other is not. Others are afraid of mice and frogs, but you are not. Or if a person drowned in a past life, then in this life he may have an inexplicable fear of water.
To overcome fear, create the habit of taking action despite the fear. Understand that fear is a common reaction that occurs in you in response to trying to take actions that are unusual for you.
What kinds of fears are there and where do we get them from?
1. Fear of the future. This fear goes back to ancient times, when man was still a herd animal, and is motivated by the instinct of self-preservation. In those days, it was difficult for a person to survive alone, and therefore, in order to protect themselves from external dangers, people united into tribes. We have already said that if an ancient man was driven out by a herd, then he was doomed to death, because alone he could neither hunt nor defend himself from wild animals. Today we do not need to protect ourselves from predators, but still this fear makes itself felt in difficult life situations.
What situations can arise in the modern world for a person to become afraid? These are, first of all, conflicts with others - work colleagues and loved ones. Conflict with the team is subconsciously seen as a possible expulsion, and deep-seated fears surface. A person who has an ancient fear of the future does not want to enter into polemics and arguments with colleagues and superiors. But not because he is good-natured, but because he trembles for his place. He does not want to lose him and avoids conflicts in every possible way, does not try to defend his point of view, although, as we know, the truth is born in a dispute. By avoiding conflicts, we cannot achieve the truth, take a step in understanding the opponent, while maintaining our point of view. It turns out that fear of the future prevents us from moving forward.
2. Fear of physical pain. This fear is the result of other fears, emotional overload, tension caused by the work of the imagination, and overstrain of the nervous system. The nervous system becomes so sensitive that it is capable of physical suffering. And what seems of no importance to an ordinary person causes a painful condition in a person with a weakened nervous system. Here the approach must be twofold. On the one hand, if a person experiences physical ailments in the form of illnesses, injuries, etc., then it is necessary to provide him with measures for improvement - sedatives and painkillers. But you also need to understand that his lowered pain threshold is caused by sensitive emotionality and painful perception of surrounding events. And in this regard, it is necessary to provide him with both psychological assistance and provide conditions so that the psyche does not experience unnecessary stress.
3. Fear of mental pain. This fear relates to a greater extent to the sphere of intersexual relations. It is typical for both men and women. And although outwardly a person seems to strive for relationships with the opposite sex, he is subconsciously afraid and avoids serious relationships. Mental pain occurs when the most precious, most important thing in life collapses. Such fear arises as a result of the mental pain that was once suffered when parting with a loved one. Non-acceptance of parting occurs when “merging” with the object of desire, when a loved one becomes the highest value and meaning of life, internal freedom is lost and attachment arises, and then dependence. Parting with a loved one, even his death, is perceived less painfully than betrayal and leaving for another.
Understanding the priority of the soul will help you get rid of fears, when any practical experience, even if it causes pain, helps the soul gain wisdom and learn to solve assigned problems. You need to understand that pain is an inevitable accompaniment of development, and a loved one should no longer be considered an object of pleasure and possession, but as a fellow traveler on the path of life. The person on earth suffers, but the Higher “I” develops and becomes smarter.
Building correct human relationships teaches divine love - love free from personal ideals and personal desires. That is, a person learns to love, to be close, but not to limit the freedom of another, learns not to depend on the object of desire and preserve his freedom and individuality. Only a free person is capable of changing the world around him, of selfless help and achieving his goal. And without the ability to properly build relationships with a loved one, it is impossible to learn how to properly build relationships with the whole world.
4. Fear of failure. It affects many people in different fields of activity. We are afraid of being misunderstood by others, afraid of their evaluation and contempt. We experience the fear that we will not be able to achieve what we want, that we will not be able to take advantage of the favorable opportunity to implement our plans. Fear of failure is the result of low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence, and being hung up on the results of an activity. If you are afraid of failure, it means that you are comparing yourself to others, their life to yours. You look at the achievements of others and also want to repeat their success, to acquire the same thing as them. Firstly, the desire for something due to low self-esteem, lack of self-confidence and envy is a false motive and therefore cannot be achieved. Secondly, everyone has their own destiny, and what one needs may not be needed for another.
If we consider low self-esteem, then it means dislike for yourself, for who you are, making too high demands. Self-doubt is the other side of spiritual pride. Due to uncertainty, fear arises, which slows down decision-making, fetters actions and prevents you from taking the next step. Stiffness occurs when there is strong control over one’s behavior and speech, a desire to exert a certain influence on the interlocutor, overconfidence in one’s own rightness and reluctance to hear others’ opinions different from one’s own, a desire to correspond to one’s internal status, one’s personal ideal, etc. Therefore, uncertainty, like other complexes, serves as a kind of traffic jam that prevents your pride from being released. If you remove the complex itself without the necessary understanding of the reason for its appearance, then with its disappearance pride will be released. There are many psychological methods for removing complexes and fears, but they act superficially. They only remove the effect, not the cause.
It is more correct to realize the cause of your insecurity and various types of complexes and eliminate them with the help of spiritual practices. And if we are to use psychological methods to remove complexes, then this must be done simultaneously with the method of neutralizing your inner imperfections and cultivating a feeling of love.
5. Fear for the individual. This fear has many manifestations and types. It makes a person commit false actions and strive for unnecessary goals. Accordingly, this leads to a departure from one’s life task and distances a person from his true mission.
Before considering this fear, you need to understand what personality is. Personality is the material component of a person. Matter is that which is mortal. The soul, as we know, is eternal. So, matter in a person is the physical, emotional and mental bodies. This is personality. It disintegrates after the death of a person. It's just a shell. Just as a person changes clothes after a while, so the soul changes the body. But usually a person is identified with his personality, and thinks that he is the body, so he holds on to it, afraid of losing it. Although this is absurd. People die sooner or later, and no one can avoid it. A person who trembles for his favorite clothes and does not want to part with them seems not quite normal to others. In the same way, if you look at it objectively, the desire to avoid what cannot be avoided seems ridiculous. Clothes wear out, the body ages, and there is no escape from it. But we are still afraid, and this fear pushes us to unnecessary actions.
One of the manifestations of fear for the individual is the imposition of one’s ideals on others. Let's take a person who is fairly highly moral and well-educated - he has high concepts of how to live and behave in society. Naturally, he follows his ideals in his life. But the trouble is, not everyone lives like him. This circumstance causes indignation and irritation in our hero. How so? You need to live correctly, but you are doing it wrong. He begins to teach how to live in his understanding. On the one hand, this is a good impulse. But only if his desire to teach people moral behavior comes from good intentions, and not from personal motives. And the motive may be this: fear of unpredictable and traumatic situations. That is, a person is afraid of such cases that will bring him mental trauma. Therefore, many developed people react painfully to injustice in society. But this indignation is false, because the desire for high ideals and the desire to see these ideals in the real world are motivated by the internal fear of conflict situations that can cause mental pain and force one to behave contrary to one’s own beliefs, norms and rules. Therefore, such people strive to impose their beliefs on as many people as possible in order to feel as safe as possible.
Another common manifestation of fear for the individual is control of the surrounding space. A person is afraid of everything unknown and uncontrollable. When he finds himself in an unfamiliar environment, he is always attentive and careful. This is a normal manifestation of the instinct of self-preservation. But still, if a person is in contact with his soul, he subconsciously feels, foresees future events, and it takes much less time to adapt. With external control, a kind of internal scanning of space occurs. When the surrounding space is known, studied and the conclusion is made that nothing is in danger, liberation occurs. In the meantime, there is a possibility of unpredictable events, a person carefully controls the behavior of people and the events that occur. Therefore, when finding oneself in an unknown environment or among unfamiliar people, a person becomes constrained and complex.
Another manifestation of fear for the individual is the desire for high status. An individual strives to obtain a high position, universal recognition, respect, to prove his exclusivity because he wants to secure the space around him. He thinks that if he achieves one of the above, no one will be able to encroach on him, cause him pain and trouble. Having achieved the above, a person relaxes, but the fear does not go away. It remains in the subconscious. Next, a person can expect negative situations that will wrest fear from the inner depths, which will force him to work with this fear in one way or another.
Most importantly, fear not only interferes with living and actively interacting with others, but also takes a person away from the real path of life or distorts the motive for actions. External fear is a reaction to a life-threatening situation occurring at the moment. Internal fear is present in the subconscious, forcing a person to constantly be on edge, expecting an attack every second. Internal fear forces a person to adapt to situations, manage and manipulate others to ensure his own safety. A person controlled by internal fear cannot be open to the world; his actions, desires, thoughts are always motivated by personal egoism, even if outwardly they look decent.
How can you cope with fears? Of course, there are a lot of psychological methods for working with fears. Many of them are effective, but some often do not give the desired effect or act temporarily. Psychology methods rather remove only the visible part of the problem, while the true cause is hidden deep inside. The most reliable and lasting effect is the transfer of consciousness from the interests of the individual to the interests of the soul. You need to understand that a person lives in order to improve his soul, internal spiritual qualities, and does not simply exist in order to reproduce, receive pleasure and then die. The mistake of many is that everyone wants a quiet life. They strive for this all their lives and work only to acquire what they need and calm down. But circumstances do not allow this to be achieved. That's why unexpected and negative moments arise in life. By solving them, a person gives up energy and gets rid of his imperfections.
If there were no such phenomena as illnesses, troubles and any other problems in general, then a person would become lazy, lie down on the sofa and turn into an animal, dealing only with satisfying passions. This is the reason why there is so much injustice in the world. Despite the level of development of science, there are a lot of problems in the world related to the provision of food, ecology, and fuel resources. It's all about focusing on the needs of the body, satisfying desires and ignoring the needs of the soul. For most modern people, the main thing is the body and everything connected with it - passions, desires, instincts. If they are satisfied, then the person feels good. If not, he suffers and blames others and even higher powers. A person often does not understand that when bodily needs are limited, the soul comes to life.
Take the Western world for example. Everything there works to satisfy the desires and instincts of people. The physical body and its needs are sacred. That's why everyone is obsessed with delicious food and sex. For Western society, the human condition is the unlimited gratification of bodily passions. Their service has been streamlined. After all, the main thing for them is the body, so it must be protected as much as possible. Apart from this, nothing else exists. And since there is nothing but the body, then it needs to be stored and protected for as long as possible. This is where phenomena such as juvenile justice arise. It is designed to cultivate only the lower needs of the child. If parents cannot fully fulfill all the whims of their children, then they are taken away. And physical punishment is perceived as an encroachment on the life and freedom of the child.
All fears come from a person’s concentration on the interests of the individual and animal instincts - the instincts of procreation and self-preservation. If you move the fulcrum to the interests of the soul, then fears will disappear over time. A person who cares more about his soul and its development is not afraid of troubles and problems in life. He perceives everything as lessons given from above, and is no longer afraid of the unknown future, does not control himself and those around him, and does not try to impose his opinion in order to protect himself from mental pain. Fear for one's personality fades into the background. It does not disappear, but it no longer paralyzes and does not interfere with active actions. After all, it is not for nothing that the Bible says that not even a hair falls from a person’s head without the knowledge of God.
Nobody wants a person to have troubles and problems. They arise only when he forgets about his goal and relaxes. If a person strives to develop in life, then he will have fewer troubles. There is also such a thing as faith in the divine plan, which helps to realize that everything happens to a person according to the divine will and is guided by universal laws. A person, even if he does not realize it, is the creator of his own destiny, and his thoughts and emotions give rise to the cause of events that happen to him in the future. Then any critical situation is seen as an opportunity to purify one’s personality and acquire new qualities; it becomes a necessary benefit on the path of life.
CONTENTS (introduction) | |
What is a person? | Search for the ideal |
What is the soul? | Self-realization |
Is there such a thing as rebirth? | Shaping events |
Our soul's goals | Conditions for implementing an idea |
Shaping Destiny | A different look at mistakes |
Relationship between people | How to use your fear |
Reasons for loneliness | Neutralization of negative programs |
Relationship problems | Where do diseases come from? |
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Example. Single mother with a constantly ill child.
The child catches a cold as if from just a breath of wind, but the wait for recovery drags on for many weeks, only to then catch a cold again after a short time. The mother is almost constantly paralyzed by fear for her daughter, for her life. Exhausted, tired, desperate, she is afraid. Afraid of what? Of death. The death of a beloved child.
Ask how, being in your right mind, you can say that THIS is something you can desire? After all, fear is a hidden desire! How can a mother want her own child to die? The answer is yes. But, of course, not consciously. Here I will make a short digression to explain the mechanism.
The mechanism of the subconscious
So how does it all work. Being in a difficult situation, experiencing negative emotions about it, thinking unpleasant thoughts, we worry and emotionally go into the negative. We are no longer in a state of joy, which means we are not in harmony with ourselves, not in tune with God.
How to get rid of fears and anxiety? Let me remind you that the Subconscious is the highest part of us; it is closely connected with the Force that created us . Its main task is to provide us with a life of joy in our earthly incarnation, adjusting the material world around us in accordance with our thoughts, and therefore with our desires (as it represents, let me remind you, it’s just everything).
And now the Subconscious sees the first most obvious reason for our Lack of joy (why should it go into the jungle of feelings and conventions to understand). And he suggests doing it as simply as possible - removing this reason from our lives! This is the simplest thing, no reason - no problem!
How does all this relate to fear?
But in our earthly incarnation we are creatures endowed with ideas about ethical values. Each with their own spiritual attachments, knowledge of “good and bad,” love, feelings, and finally, everything that makes us human in the flesh. And such a “simple solution” (simple for the world of Souls, but not for the world of people) simultaneously causes incompatible duality in us.
On the one hand, there is a desire to get rid of the problem and live easily and in joy, and on the other hand, there is a catastrophic reluctance to get rid of it.
A person is so unbearable the thought that he himself WISHES this to happen, that in order to maintain mental order, this is all wrapped up in the form of fear, like a candy wrapper.
Let's return to our example with the single mother.
How to get rid of fears and anxiety? Let's return to her fear of the death of her beloved only daughter. This is a real life example, and as a result of searching for benefits from the death of her daughter through psychological work with the Subconscious, the mother unexpectedly realized the following. She, despite all the hardships of life, feels alive, desiring male warmth, feelings, and female happiness.
She wants to be loved, she wants a full-fledged family, because she’s still young, happiness can still be... And then it turns out that she has a negative belief in her head from a young age that no man needs her with a child. Perhaps these are the words of her mother: “who needs you with a child!” Which at any age get stuck in the subcortex and pass all filters for truth without interference.
This is why we always need to be extremely careful about what we say to our children. At the same time, it doesn’t matter at all how old our children are – 5 or 35.
One way or another, the woman’s subconscious has formed the idea of her own child as a threat to personal happiness. And I have written more than once about the powerful influence mothers can have on the health of their children .
Conclusion
So it turns out that the mother, on the one hand, subconsciously wished that her child simply did not exist, and on the other hand, the unbearability of this thought quickly clothed it in the form of fear and the mother threw all her strength, all her energy into preventing the death of the child.
But the positive intention, or the benefit from it, is extremely simple. To be happy, to be married to a good man, loving and able to warm a heart that has seen disappointment. So are such heartbreaking sacrifices necessary?? Of course not. If you want to be happy, be it!
Acknowledging the feeling
This is the first place to start. When we try in every possible way to get away from our own emotions, we drive negativity deep inside. As a result, irritation and self-doubt accumulate, and numerous complexes grow. This happens very often with people of different social status. If you don't work on a problem, it won't solve itself. You need to learn to meet your feelings halfway, to reveal them. Only in this case can we talk about full self-realization. There is an opinion that only a strong person knows how to admit his weaknesses. After all, when we reject the presence of worries, they become larger and gradually take over our subconscious. The sooner you can recognize the fact that a certain fear really exists, the greater the chances become to try to regain your peace of mind.
How to get rid of obsessive fears and anxiety?
How to get rid of fears and anxiety? Our subconscious as our “Super Self”, part of God who created us, loves us immensely and only gives us a CHOICE, offering the simplest solution. And only we can decide whether to accept it or not. Of course, those who are 100% responsible for their lives. In this situation discussed in the last article, it was enough for the mother to cancel the negative belief in herself and replace it with a new positive one.
She realized and fully accepted that she herself is a great value, and together with her daughter she is doubly valuable. That she, as a source of feminine energy, love, kindness and care, is desirable for any man. And with my daughter - doubly so.
That she and her daughter were created in order to create comfort around them and fill them, to accept care and give it themselves. Created for happiness and joy.
Needless to say, after such awareness and fundamental changes in her mother’s worldview, her daughter began to recover and became ill in the future extremely rarely. Their family life improved.
Anxiety and agitation
Anxiety and excitement are about the same thing. Both states are accompanied by an increased heart rate and keep you alert and alert. But anxiety is considered to be a negative stimulus, and excitement is a positive one.
To change your mindset, try thinking of anxiety as excitement, which will help you avoid negative consequences. This will help you switch to a more optimistic mood, calm down a little and do more for a positive outcome.
There are many reasons for fear
For example, the reason for frantic worries about already adult children, as if nothing happens to them, may be some background conflict with the children, or an unresolved situation. Both of these greatly hurt the parent’s heart and exhaust them energetically, creating negative thoughts.
The subconscious offers the simplest solution: no ungrateful children - no problem. And then instantly, in order not to traumatize the psyche, our ego dresses this irreconcilable duality “I passionately want - I don’t want under any circumstances” - in fear.
The stronger the fear, the more important it is for a person to achieve positive intention and calm in each specific case . What about positive intention, that is, what is the benefit? Life is easy!
Think with a smile and warmth about your children, be in a state of happiness and joy. Feel important and respected! Well, feel it like that! Why do you need outside confirmation?
Your loved ones mirror to you only what you think about yourself! Do you see disrespect for yourself? But this only means that you do not respect yourself. And in some ways you don’t respect your loved ones, perhaps your children in the first place.
What to do? How can you get rid of fears and anxiety?
Look at yourself from the outside. See your mistakes and create the intention to change. The relationships and circumstances in your life will change. And you will no longer need the debilitating fear for your children.
Because you now know that they, just like you, are in the loving palms of God at every moment of their lives. Your communication with children goes from heart to heart. And you give them love in full .
Lack of given love and recognition, by the way, is a very common cause of fear of parental death. Now for children. And the root cause of this fear is to give parents love, care, warm words, in general, to give what was not given, mired in squabbles or alienation.
And also to feel like a loved child. This all often pours out in torrents on one’s deathbed. Or even worse - at a funeral, then by default they forgive everything and everyone.
Therefore, the desire is strong, and therefore the fear. But why bring it to the point of no return? Give it to your parents now! While everyone is still alive and can hear, feel, forgive, love and desire it! Call, write, talk at any time of the day! It's never too late. And the fear will go away.
Is fear a disease?
The behavior of people suffering from obsessive thoughts, phobias or panic attacks changes significantly over time. They develop a fear of communicating with strangers, and anxious thoughts do not leave such people.
They are worried about the opinions of others, and it becomes a pain for them to travel on public transport, attend parties, or be on the street during rush hour. And being in the center of people's attention becomes a challenge. How to stop being afraid?
This is not a disease, so medications can only temporarily relieve such unpleasant circumstances.
The feeling of fear is a psychological reaction to lack of expression, to depression and to the unrealization of innate properties.
People with a sensitive nervous system, a vivid imagination, increased emotionality and imaginative thinking are especially susceptible to feelings of panic and fear. Creative individuals are frequent victims.
How to get rid of fears and anxiety on your own? Fear Relief Technique
Next, we will consider one technique of psychological self-correction. Which can significantly alleviate fear while working with it. Let’s call it cheerfully – “Reduction to the Absurd.”
The principle is that, while relaxing, you need to imagine in detail the situation that instills fear. And then imagine what will happen after it. Imagine a funeral with the distribution of pies. Flight to the next world, conversation on clouds. Having found a cheerful note and realizing that it couldn’t be more absurd.
Then consider everything in reverse order with inner gratitude. Gratefulness to death, funerals, fear, and until now. Well, don’t forget to thank yourself. And then, from the very beginning, mentally build the situation only in a favorable way.
Result of practice
As a result, fear is overcome and understanding emerges. That in fear itself there is nothing transcendental, something that cannot be endured. Well, it is being replaced by the blissful development of events that is being realized.
Live easily and freely, to the fullest and in harmony with your loved ones! And the question of how to get rid of fears will then arise less and less often. Good luck and happiness to you!
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How to work with your fears?
If fears really interfere with your life, then you need to work with them. To do this, you need to go through two main steps:
Step 1 – Fear must be recognized. Think about what specifically scares you, define clear boundaries of fear.
Once you recognize your fear, you need to take action to overcome it. Usually the human psyche manifests one of the following reactions:
- "Run!" – as soon as a person gets scared of something, then, predictably, he begins to run away from the problem.
- "Hit!" – often, instead of making a rational decision, a person simply begins to react aggressively to the situation, which also does not solve the problem, but rather aggravates it.
- “Stupor...” - a person is completely lost and, not knowing what to do, does nothing at all!
This means that to solve the problem you need to respond correctly to the fear that arises.
Step 2 – Meet the fear – work through it. The result is relief from fear.
If you start to understand, you can understand that most fears, 90 percent for sure, do not have a rational grain. Those. many of them are simply far-fetched, nurtured by our complexes.
Of course, those few 10% are real fears that help us survive, they are, as it were, an instinct of self-preservation. Think for yourself, a person will not deliberately jump from a height without insurance, tease an animal that is stronger and more dangerous, etc. The fear of death, in this case, is rational - it helps to avoid the consequences of a life-threatening situation.
But if we take another situation. For example, you are looking for a new job. We created a resume and posted it on a job search website. In addition, when looking through vacancies, you respond to those that interest you. And then interview offers begin to arrive. Then you suddenly realize that you are afraid to go to a meeting with a potential employer. But there is no danger in this situation, certainly for life. The worst thing that can happen is that you will be told that you are not suitable.
If you don’t overcome your fear, you may not find a job! But this is really dangerous.
Having worked through the fear, realizing that nothing terrible can happen, you take a step forward - you begin to make decisions that are beneficial to you.