Self-esteem test. Methodology M. Rosenberg scale.


What is self-esteem?

Self-esteem is one of the main components of a successful person, which allows you to achieve the desired heights and feel the strength of your own self-esteem. Also, self-respect is the main degree of personal self-development, ensuring a sustainable existence in society, based on three parameters:

  • Emotionality makes a person respect himself as an individual.
  • Competence expands the knowledge base in different directions that are interesting to the individual.
  • Sociability allows an individual to communicate with his environment, realize and develop his personality. It is important to recognize and support one or more people from the environment, which increases self-esteem and self-esteem.

On the other hand, if your sense of self-esteem is not hypertrophied, but quite mature, approval from the outside is not required. People whose self-esteem as a degree of personal self-development is not sufficiently established tend to stand out in the crowd and put themselves on display. At the same time, an individual with insufficient self-esteem will always strive to show off.

In order to achieve a stable level of self-esteem, it is necessary:

  • To define a clear framework of inviolability by affirming life principles and main goals that will be unshakable for the individual throughout his life - not everything can be bought.
  • Treat people the way you want to see them treat you. The old biblical parable is still relevant today - you should not put your own personality above others, because a feeling of superiority will not add self-respect to the degree of self-development of an individual in society. It is not difficult to learn self-respect; it is more difficult to maintain this level.

Your level of self-esteem is self-sufficient if:

  1. You always act according to your internal principles and beliefs, even if your opinion does not coincide with public opinion.
  2. You do not need universal worship, and do not see the need for it. Such people may remain in the shadows, but deeds are always assessed on their merits, which makes the individual a respected unit of society.
  3. You treat others as you treat yourself - with a modicum of respect and attention; rudeness, contempt and humiliation are not in your interests.
  4. You remain cool and calm in any situation, celebrating a victory with dignity or accepting defeat.
  5. You are respected by your work environment and loved ones, appreciating many of your actions, and your successes are accompanied by congratulations.


EDGE AND BOUNDARIES

How often we suffer by allowing others to do things that degrade our dignity. Internally, the feeling of injustice shows us the limit beyond which we should not allow other people to go in insulting our self. Every person has such boundaries, and sooner or later the word “Enough is enough!” is heard. The question is that this word should have been said earlier, before another blow to self-esteem was dealt. People allow others to disregard their opinions and feelings, speak derogatoryly, insult, and sometimes be subjected to physical humiliation (for example, beatings or sexual coercion) from loved ones.

Ways to develop sufficient self-esteem, lack of self-esteem

Lack of self-esteem is expressed in excessive modesty and the desire to constantly remain in the shadows. Constant doubts and contentment with little also lead to weakening self-esteem. In order to understand what is happening to you, you need to clearly know the answers to the following questions:

  1. What is more important to you - victories or losses?
  2. Who do you listen to more - yourself, or people with authority?
  3. Are you afraid that other people won't like you?
  4. How often do you feel depressed and self-deprecating?
  5. Do you constantly improve your own level of competence in your favorite activities?

You have a deficit of self-esteem if, in the process of answering questions, you discovered the following points:

  • Recording your own mistakes, and no one else’s;
  • Self-esteem is formed solely from the opinions of others, which constantly makes you doubt yourself and close yourself off;
  • Strive to please others, experiencing a lack of respect from someone;
  • In comparison with other people, you put yourself lower, you feel insufficient competitiveness, inferiority, alienation from society;
  • You give up and the desire to make yourself better, to grow spiritually and physically - there is no motivation in what you love, your goals fade.

In order to raise your self-esteem, you don’t need to go to special trainings, listen to experts and get into science. Complete a few simple tasks:

  1. Be confident and approach all problems calmly.
  2. Don't be shy about helping others and asking for help.
  3. Any of your actions brings benefit to others, and therefore respect.
  4. Keeping promises is the key to self-respect.
  5. Share your skills and knowledge with people.
  6. Tell the truth, try not to lie.

Look for mentors, not critics

The main mistake of most people with low scores is focusing on the opinions of others. Trying to listen to other people's advice and the generally accepted point of view, a person chooses a place of study, work, life partner, hobby, and so on. At the same time, a person considers it shameful to defend his own opinion. Based on this, two points should be taken into account:

  • Beware of advisers. If the person who is trying to criticize you or teach you about life is not satisfied with his own situation, it is unlikely that you will be able to gain any valuable experience from him. Most likely, he is embittered and is trying to push you down the same wrong path.
  • Try to learn from people who are happy with their lives and have achieved a lot. They are usually reluctant to give advice and do not reveal their secrets. But such people can be good mentors if you can gain their trust.

Self-esteem as part of egocentrism

Egocentrism is self-respect as the degree of self-development of an individual through self-love and the desire to subordinate others to one’s own goals. This character trait is expressed in a constant desire to fight with others, accepting people as the opposite of oneself. That is why an egocentric person is not always able to objectively perceive the situation, seeking self-respect in reproaching others and denying himself. In other words, egocentrism is excessive pride. Constant fixation on one's own feelings and emotions can lead to separation from the real world and the creation of a fictional one, which is typical for creative individuals.

How to understand the transition of your self-esteem into egocentrism?

  1. Inadequate self-esteem - living in another world, confinement in one’s own thoughts leads to a loss of adequacy. Reality is perceived differently, and the desire to find an excuse or blame oneself for all sins becomes self-defense. Low self-esteem does not allow you to realize yourself in society and in the workplace - your self-esteem does not allow you to express emotions and feelings. With inflated self-esteem, pride overflows and a person considers himself a king among slaves.
  2. Life in fantasy is immersion in the world of colors and goodness, which over time develops into addiction. An individual's dreams become a bunker from life's failures and real life. All people tend to fantasize, but it is important not to mistake the artificial world for the real one.
  3. Constantly comparing yourself with loved ones, friends, colleagues and other people. Achievements, successes, acquisitions and other indicators of friends, acquaintances, relatives come to the fore, which makes a person insecure. Self-esteem falls and self-development stops. Moreover, constantly looking at the lives of strangers makes a person an egoist, hiding individuality behind envy - a person ceases to feel significance and happiness. Try not to allow this to happen - you need to be proud of your own achievements, regardless of the victories of others. Strive to make the world a better place, help people and develop the spiritual world.

How to overcome egocentrism?

Put yourself in the shoes of others, experience their emotions, pay attention to everyone who is near you. Gradually come down to earth, let go of childhood and perceive the real world, feeling responsible for your actions. If you are not able to understand all your own actions, then you still need to grow up. A wise person, endowed with life experience, will not get involved in a dispute and prove his point of view as the only correct one. Only a mature personality is self-confident. We recognize the correctness of our actions by the reaction of our environment.

Self-esteem, as a degree of personal development, cannot do without a specific desire for the highest. Living in dreams leads to disappointment, because expectations are not always met. The ability to set the right goals and survive small mistakes leads to personal improvement. A person is truly happy and free at the moment of abandoning all prejudices and constraining beliefs. Set goals for yourself that will make you better - a person strives only for the most sincere endeavors. There is nothing worse than someone else's path, where you are exposed to a different worldview and views. Self-respect is achieved by having an open mind and realizing the importance of your own affairs.

Don't think of yourself as an untouchable ideal who is above others. People prone to egocentrism think that their problems are more important than the rest of the world, but such individuals are painfully aware of failures, which makes the search for alternative solutions unsuccessful. Stop thinking that the people around you live a simpler life, they have fewer problems and more time to relax. Each of us faces difficulties in life.

This leads to the conclusion about the dual meaning of egocentrism. This quality develops a person, but at the same time makes him one-sided, interfering with the development of the spiritual world. For self-esteem, egocentrism is beneficial in small quantities, without affecting the circle of friends and family.

To lose yourself

A very interesting topic about losing yourself, losing yourself, betraying yourself.

And the opposite - to find yourself, self-respect, to find yourself.

As with many other topics from Evolution, I understood it for myself and stopped in the sink only when I read her articles on this topic. Until you know what exactly you need to look for and realize how it manifests itself, you won’t find it, you won’t feel it.

After some time, precisely thanks to this knowledge, it was possible not only to quickly fully recover, but also to reach a stable state - for the first time, I so clearly and fully understood the value of myself for myself. There was a realization that I am the most important thing I have. We can say that it was only here that I was able to fully find myself. And then everything became somehow completely different in my life.

Draining usually occurs during a person's growth and maturation. In the sense that everyone has experienced and is experiencing this. But when you already know what it is and see a drain in your place, you have to stop.

A drain usually occurs when someone else has become a very important, significant figure in your head and life.

When you are ready to stop being yourself, to betray yourself, your interests, your dreams, your children, whatever. To adapt, even to the extreme - to get into debt, to do something that is not useful for oneself and even unsafe - just to win the attention, interest, favor, and favor of another person.

That is, usually this is a consequence of a rather strong imbalance, unhealthy dependence on a person, fusion, addiction.

Drainage occurs especially often in areas where there is severe hunger. This is not necessarily a love sphere - it can be a drain in friendship, in work.

The drainage does not occur immediately, but gradually. Adaptation occurs and what was previously considered terrible and unimaginable can gradually become quite normal.

Drainage often goes unnoticed. Hiding behind illusions, psychodefenses that you are doing this for yourself or nothing special - “what’s wrong”, or some other trick the psyche can perform to protect you from stress, face the truth.

I really like how Marina Komissarova (Evolution) clearly and firmly conveys some things. For example,

“Betraying oneself is mortally dangerous”

She has an excellent article, “Losing Yourself,” which explains all this beautifully and clearly. I will give a few excerpts from it a little lower.

And do you know what is the most interesting thing about all this?

We merge to get attention and interest.

And those who have merged themselves are of no use to anyone, they are not interesting.

Nobody is interested in the weak - it's boring and it's dangerous. This is a bad partner, unreliable. How easily he betrayed himself, just as easily he will betray you, this is felt intuitively, without conscious reflection.

Strong people who value themselves and feel good about themselves, who are true to themselves, their values, who have their own interests are attractive and safe. Everyone is looking for the strong.

They love a beautiful, integral person who respects and does not betray himself.

That is, merging yourself is absolutely useless.

We get the REVERSE effect.

Draining will never make us more significant. But just the opposite.

At first it’s just boring for the person you’re trying to please, and then your importance becomes negative for him, you become sticky and inadequate, and then it becomes more and more dangerous for yourself in terms of loss of self-esteem.

You drain yourself and waste a lot of time, which then takes a long time to recover. That is, self-betrayal occurs for the sake of at least some closeness to a significant figure, which will then lead to a negative result, a low-energy state, a feeling of shame for one’s actions, and a decrease in self-esteem.

And there is also a very important point - HOW exactly to get out of the drain.

If you try to get out through demonizing your partner (this is the same merging of boundaries and his high importance), shifting the blame onto him, then you will get stuck in a gestalt for a long time.

But if through groping for self-respect, adjusting the locus of control to internal, through separation of boundaries, modesty - this will be most effective and favorable for both a quick exit and so that in future relationships there is a chance that everything will be better.

Evolution had one analysis of a letter, where a girl liked a guy, and in order to impress him, she overpowered herself and jumped off a cliff into the sea.

And Evolution’s commentary on this situation somehow conveyed to me very well that even if it seems to you that the drain is not noticeable, and doesn’t even seem to look like a drain, then it is still perfectly felt by the other side, which is very significant for you , and you are less and less for her with each act of self-betrayal. The guy immediately became bored that the girl was so weak that she so quickly recognized someone so important in her life to behave like that.

This was the comment on the letter:

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“He immediately understood that she broke herself and jumped for him.

Well, she betrayed herself.

Courage and will did not increase from this overcoming (for this you had to jump for the sake of yourself, your affirmation), but immediately went into the negative, because you transferred your will to him, appointed him as the master of your will.”

Here are a couple more quotes about how a drain invisible to anyone but you will be dangerous:

“And even if no one sees, is that really the point?

You drain yourself anyway. When everyone around you sees what’s left of you, it will be too late.”

“Many people don’t understand that it’s not enough not to run after a person, you also have to not feed yourself to his figure.

In your outer life you can keep quiet, but if you are always waiting for attention, paying attention and monitoring the pages of someone, your king follows him and looks into his eyes like a dog. “Hello, could you give my queen some attention? She doesn’t even want to hear from me, she’s bored with me, but she thinks about you and is waiting for you.”

Shame on you? Or does it seem ashamed when it’s visible, but if it’s quietly, in your head, then no one sees?

As a result of such a secret drain, the figure of the chosen one grows to a size where it becomes very difficult to distract from it.”

Here are some excerpts from the article “Losing Yourself”:

"Lost man. Can you imagine what he looks like? Weak, scared, unsure of himself, without a sense of boundaries, unable to find support in himself. This is a man who has lost himself.

From the same series - waiting for the “last straw”, which supposedly should overflow the “cup of patience”.

In fact, this cup is made of rubber; it gets a little deeper all the time, with every drop. Of course this will not stop. The threshold of what is acceptable is constantly increasing a little; this is the law of adaptation. But people think that they have some kind of “cup” and it can be filled, and as soon as you fill it, you won’t want to endure a single drop anymore and it will be easy to leave. Until the cup is full, trying is not torture, you still have nothing to lose.

People are afraid of losing another, but not of losing themselves.

In fact, losing yourself is the worst thing. Not only will you end up in hell without yourself, but no one else will need you, everyone will scatter from you in different directions.

A lost person is a real burden, he is clingy or whining all the time, his energy is negative, like a vampire’s, and no one likes him. Even those close to him tinker with him only out of a sense of duty, without love.

Trying is real torture if you are trying to force yourself on another person, and it is torture for both him and you.

Imagine, YOU ARE NOT NEEDED, think about this word.

You are not needed, but you don’t care, you are trying to convince the person to take you on any terms.”

“If you think that this is nonsense, that you have nothing to lose, then yes, the crown can close it down so as not to spoil your mood. If being imposed on you is unpleasant, but you don’t see anything wrong with it, the crown will help you close it and consider it your mercy and kindness.

And if you understand that loss of self-respect is mortally dangerous, the crown won’t even touch you. All the rubber bands will break and it will fly off to the side. The crown will not play with deadly things. When a train is rushing towards you, she will not convince you that you are in no danger and you have nothing to lose by staying on the rails.

So here, if you understand how dangerous it is to merge yourself even in your own thoughts, you will not want to do this, you will not be your own enemy.

It is important to understand how necessary self-respect is to cherish it like the apple of your eye.

“I don’t lose anything,” the man thinks and dials the girl’s phone number for the tenth time, who doesn’t answer him.” Continued here.

More useful Evolution articles on this topic:

— “Section of boundaries” — “Leaky borders and self-dislike”

More quotes from her from other articles on this topic:

“See what your blind spots are. Do you seriously think that Asia might be of interest to Pechorin and make Belladonna jealous. And a rag cannot interest anyone, ever. This is an empty place. She is a person in herself, but in this field of relationships she is an empty place. »

If you go on a date and think too actively about how to dress in such a way that he will like you, you are sacrificing your self-respect a little bit . It’s good if there’s a minus on the other side, then everything is fine, but if it’s already a plus, this plus can grow.

It’s right to please your beloved and loving person who pleases you.

That is, all the rules for starting a relationship are completely different from those in marriage, especially when there is balance in marriage. In a marriage there are two relatives. And at the beginning of a relationship, the situation is closer to a war game; anyone can end up with a plus or minus. »

“If a woman who has fed herself takes off the crown, she will not find herself at all, there will be emptiness, there will not even be anywhere to move the locus, that is, there will not even be stress.

There will simply be a need to merge with someone or something.

And it will be difficult to restore yourself.

For most, it turns out to be irreversible. Although it is theoretically possible to rise from any ashes, in practice people do not have time.”

“When you write about a person all the time, you have to think: is he writing about you?

If you write about him all the time, talk about him and think about him, but he doesn’t write about you or even read about you, you are feeding yourself to his person. If you monitor his pages after a breakup and he has forgotten about you, you are feeding yourself to his person. Not for him! He doesn't need you. Lyarve in her field, who will soon grow so big that she will completely take you into slavery and you will cease to distinguish her will from yours.

This does not apply to cases when you read pages not for the sake of a person, but for the sake of information that you want to use for yourself (whether you can or not is not so important, the main thing is that the center of intentions is your interest, your benefit, this strengthens you). If there is no benefit for you personally and cannot be, and this is only endless following on the heels of a person and interest in his person, life in his field, then things are bad.

You lose self-respect and perhaps there is almost nothing left of it.

That is, this applies to any relationship, not just love ones.

This applies to any enemy of yours or the object of your envy, your resentment, at work, in the family, on the Internet, to any person significant to you. How it touched you, hooked you and provoked you is not important, the main thing is that you are now merging yourself.

But it concerns love relationships first of all, because in all other relationships you expect at least some benefit for yourself, but in love relationships the only benefit is the attitude towards you.”

“A wrong step in a situation of imbalance is always a step against oneself, a step towards loss of self-respect and, as a result, the respect of a partner.

It’s very easy to change a partner’s plus, especially at the very beginning, into a minus if you set a course for self-respect. But many people in the red do the opposite: they gradually turn into wimps, losing the remnants of self-respect. Their significance for their partner becomes negative, and their figure in the general field is so insignificant and weak that they no longer have good self-control and cannot control themselves.

This is such a sad picture.

Fortunately, you can even taxi out from the bottom.

Unfortunately, many go even lower. In hell. »

“It’s clear from the phrase that you actively use the tongs, and your face is dissatisfied and unhappy. Well, how can you be satisfied while betraying yourself? »

“It is in the interests of your children not to lose self-respect and not to cling to your husband from below. The more disgusted she is with him, the faster he will leave and the less he will want to maintain a relationship with her and even with the children, perhaps (if he holds on too tightly and becomes more disgusted).

You really don’t understand that being clingy and humiliating does not mean pinning your husband and your father’s children to yourself like a shelf to the wall, but gives exactly the opposite, opposite effect - disgust and fatigue and the desire to escape ? Because this is not a shelf, but a subject of will.

Why do all women have almost an opposition - here are the children, and here I am. How do you protect the interests of children by becoming nasty?”

“Although I know why it happens. From the habit of thinking that if you are very dependent, you will not be able to leave because of feelings of guilt and duty, but if you show strength and independence, you will calmly leave for someone else.

Like you can be tied to your addiction, hence the humility, the dog-like look, the willingness to endure everything and the eternally unhappy look with a pitiful smile.

Something childish. They will take pity on the weak and will not abandon him.

Maybe they won’t leave you right away, but the feeling of guilt will simply lead to agony and gradual decay.

And if you let go or push away in time (pushing away in response to words about dislike is not at all the same as pushing away a loving person, these are generally opposite things and have the opposite effect!), he will again be bored and look at his mistress gloomily.

But after a complete breakdown, he will be happy that he got rid of him and finally lives with his beloved. You cannot allow a breakup if you want to save your marriage. Maintain self-respect, then there will be no complete collapse.”

“The most important thing to understand is that the drain of resources begins when your partner is positive, and you are negative, when you have an imbalance.

And in order to retain his favor (a very precise word, his will is your good), you begin to drain your resources.

Do not cling to a plus partner, or at least be aware of how you are clinging and how he is plus, and there will be no drain of resources. »

“When the locus falls into place and everything becomes in order with the boundaries, a person closes his holes on his own, does not wait for recharge from the outside.

If you get out of the old relationship correctly, that is, correct the locus, understand that there is a hole and close it yourself, there will be no hole or similar situation in future relationships, since the skill appears to provide yourself with resources and close the holes.

And due to the development of such skills, self-esteem grows, and it will no longer let it stick.”

“This is such a sad picture and let’s see how to change it.

You need to learn to do everything not for show, but for the sake of your own approval. For your own sake, not someone else's .

Pumping up resources and the birth of your own Self begins with the fact that you cease to need an obligatory reaction.”

“You stop getting angry when they don’t answer you, you stop hanging yourself on a hook and dangling from it.

You stop making excuses, proving and explaining. It is enough for you that you yourself know how everything is.

It becomes easy for you to remain silent in response, but everything pours out of a person with leaky boundaries, he cannot hold back.

You don’t want to get into someone else’s head, because it doesn’t matter to you how they understood you, the main thing is how you said it.

You start studying not to immediately get a grade for it, but for yourself. For your growth.

You start taking care of your body not to show off photos and get likes, but for yourself. For your own pleasure.

You work to do the best job you can from your own point of view, not to be praised by your superiors. You are your own boss.

And in love, and in friendship, and everywhere else, you gain self-esteem and self-respect. You want to behave beautifully and decently in your own eyes, without relying on other people’s assessments.”

How to get out of the drain:

«It all starts with the agreement to forever remain a fool in the eyes of someone and the separation of boundaries. Let him think what he wants, stop fighting for his respect.

Then he will only rise from the floor.”

Some of the main things that accompanied this topic for me were “relying emotionally on yourself” and “groping for self-respect.”

Before this, I have a feeling that they did not physically exist - before the Evolution I did not know these concepts, I did not think about what they should be, and what it should all look like.
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how to change your lifeMarina Komissarova (Evolution)relationships between men and womenmerge yourself

Selfishness and self-development

Society perceives egoists as characters who live only for their own benefit. But is each of us capable of doing as much for others as for ourselves? We are not talking about individual actions, but about conscious actions. Perhaps the actions we take are only for personal benefit. Let's figure out what selfishness is and how it affects the self-development of an individual.

In the process of human development, the needs for a better life are constantly growing. A hundred years ago, no one had a clue about television, airplanes and the Internet, while today everyone needs it. Technological progress prolongs life, making it comfortable and safe, which coincides with the main requirements of a person. Such egoism is called healthy and reasonable, without negative consequences for the outside world. It does not affect self-development, and often stimulates self-improvement, and with it progress.

The problem is a person’s oversaturation with comfort and pleasure, which turns into an overabundance of desires and selfishness. If previously people did not have opportunities for recreation and entertainment, news was transmitted for weeks, but today the amount of information and temptations exceeds all imaginable boundaries.

Unfortunately, the world is replete with the most primitive pleasures suitable for the body and psyche. But, the lack of spiritual rest encourages the search for better quality time. Over time, a person realizes that the joy of life, spiritual and family happiness is the main goal of each of us. But, before the person realizes this, he is looking for other ways to satisfy needs, which leads to an open degree of selfishness.

The essence of selfishness

The ego is an instrument of the human psyche that requires practicality, prudence and self-interest. Ego in itself does not make a person an egoist; the problem is vanity, pride and humiliation. Suffering lies in ignorance of the essence of existence. Self-esteem ranges from collapse to unimaginable highs. As a result, selfishness becomes a way out for those suffering from rudeness and ignorance. A tough personality runs away from negativity by adopting an indifferent attitude towards others, which is practicality at the level of primitive times.

In order to achieve a goal, a vulnerable person takes more subtle steps in getting what he wants, without ceasing to be an egoist. A person with life experience is able to predict in advance the result of his own actions, presenting selfishness as altruism and benefit for others. An intelligent person does good to others so that others do good to him.

Self-esteem, as the degree of personal self-development, implies the human ego as a concept that is worthy of love, joy and happiness. A person himself demands recognition and approval through his actions. Moderate egoism leads to the development of inner peace, if you do not hide from the outside, and fight for the common good. Such an ego reveals the essence of human nature. We do not call problems valor and nobility, the main thing is to understand where the material world ends and the spiritual world begins.

Self-analysis is the path to increasing self-esteem

Pride and self-respect must have solid ground. To develop these feelings in yourself, you need to regularly conduct self-analysis and improve yourself in accordance with its conclusions. It is worth paying attention to the following points:

  • Life experience. What specific situations contributed to personal development?
  • Capabilities. A person must find at least 5 talents or skills in himself.
  • Strengths and weaknesses. The first need to be considered from the point of view of their development, and the second - overcoming.
  • Plans and dreams. What would you like to achieve in life and why haven't you done it yet?
  • Health status. Are there any problems with your health? If yes, how to eliminate them?
  • Feeling of self-fulfillment. Is it present? What helps you achieve it?

Self-esteem as a degree of self-development

Self-esteem, as a degree of personal self-development, begins with the birth of a person. During growth and maturation, the environment creates doubts in one's personality. Self-esteem develops an individual through belief in achieving one's own goals. A person believes that he can contribute to the future, enriching the present, which will give him a full life. Accordingly, learn to respect yourself, otherwise self-development will not work.

In order to develop yourself and respect yourself, follow eight rules that will take you to a new level:

  1. Be yourself always and everywhere.
  2. Value yourself - you only have you, your surroundings may not be there at the wrong time.
  3. Stop comparing yourself to others.
  4. Belief in your abilities motivates and develops.
  5. Don't blame yourself for failures, learn to forgive.
  6. Don’t listen to other people’s judgments—that way they don’t help.
  7. Accept and level out your own mistakes.
  8. Respect society, everyone you see.

Learn to love yourself - love moves the world. Self-esteem, as the main stage of personality development, requires loving your own essence, body and spirit. Find positive qualities, do good deeds, demonstrate yourself as useful to society. If you are unpleasant to your own reflection, then what can we say about those around you? Self-love and self-development is a surefire way to combat depression and lack of self-esteem.

Do not hesitate to take the initiative - perhaps you will become a leader, the owner of a large company, or the president of the country. The ability to lead a crowd is not given to many people, but if you perform first, your comrades will appear listening to you. Strive to finish what you start, which forces you to respect and develop. If others cannot comprehend the path of self-esteem and self-development, help. Such actions raise the bar of self-esteem, and with it, self-development.

Self-respect makes a person self-sufficient, educated and wise. Analyze your personality, try to avoid negative actions. Monitor your actions and actions. Raise your self-esteem and establish yourself in society.

Love yourself and realize your importance

If you want to develop self-confidence, psychology recommends loving yourself, finding positive qualities in yourself and demonstrating them in every possible way. Think about it, if you don’t like yourself, then what should others see in you? Only adequate self-esteem will help you come out of the shadows. But you shouldn’t exaggerate your merits. This has nothing to do with self-affirmation. Typically, this behavior is aimed at masking your self-doubt, rather than overcoming it.

Personality problems with low self-esteem

Self-esteem is an independent quality of everyone, which is formed independently of the outside world, psychologists, and so on. According to Maslow, self-esteem consists of self-esteem and the respect of others for one's personality.

That is, learn to analyze self-esteem using a “divide and conquer” strategy. Self-esteem does not represent a single concept - you must understand your role in society. Every man is a husband, son, father, employee, boss, lover, driver, philosopher, poet, musician, theorist, analyst, author of this article...

The more roles you remember, the more you notice your own impact on the world around you - this is self-esteem. Analyze each of these criteria, realizing where you are doing well and where you need to improve. You can’t be ashamed of your shortcomings and achievements—awareness of your own qualities is worth a lot. On the path of self-esteem, as a degree of personal self-development, it is necessary to constantly analyze oneself, understanding the non-criticality of shortcomings. Strive for perfectionism in every area of ​​your life without questioning it. The task before you is to clean the apartment, but it can take a lot of time, so it’s better not to start... But the work you start must be completed - this is the only way you will learn to love yourself.

Strive to develop, include auto-training in your daily routine, and do more every day - in just a few months, self-esteem will become indestructible.

We are faced with constant criticism from outsiders who repeat: “you won’t achieve anything, you won’t earn money for this car, you won’t go to Cyprus, you don’t have money, what can you do?” Forget about these people and prove to yourself the limitless capabilities of a person by conquering new heights. Self-knowledge, self-development and self-improvement are the key to unbending self-esteem and success in life.

SELF-RESPECT

Our self-esteem consists of two parts: emotional and competence. The emotional part is a basic, very deep attitude: “I feel good about myself” or “I feel bad about myself.” This part is unconditional, it does not depend on other people’s opinions of us and our achievements, it is formed in early childhood under the influence of the opinions of parents and other close people. If this part is strong, then even without real achievements a person can have sufficient self-respect. A sense of one's own competence is a “contingent” part of self-esteem, much more closely related to self-esteem because it has a strong component of evaluating oneself and oneself from the point of view of others. A person sets goals and achieves them, no matter what they are connected with, personal relationships, career plans, embroidering a napkin or successful fishing. If these successes are visible to others, our self-esteem increases.

Thus, we will have high self-esteem with basic self-love, as well as a sense of self-competence based on accomplishments. Then self-esteem will confirm self-esteem, and the person will be effective in relationships and satisfied with them. But a situation is possible when a person’s competence is quite high, and the emotional component is weak, or, on the contrary, there is great self-love with modest achievements (or lack thereof). And then distortions occur in our significant relationships: we feel incomplete return, resentment, and the feeling comes that we are underestimated by other people. And the whole point is that often, because of disrespect for ourselves, we allow others to treat us inappropriately.

conclusions

A person needs self-respect more than recognition from the environment, but these concepts are mutual - strong self-respect stimulates high appreciation of society. If you want to succeed, treat yourself positively by demonstrating your indispensability. The importance of self-respect for an individual cannot be overestimated - the path to self-development and comprehension of the spiritual world is achieved in precisely this way. Strive for self-development every day - create, build, write, love, respect yourself and the world around you. Remember, no one can help you the way you can.

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