The female gaze: What an ideal man should look like


Every girl has an ideal young man. But there are certain masculine qualities that every guy should have. Some character traits allow him to make the right decisions, quickly achieve his goals, be able to communicate with people of different ages and social status, behave with dignity in any situation and value his family and children.

Women's opinion

Every woman wants to be loved sincerely. Girls are looking for a man who can support them in difficult moments, be there when necessary, and find the right words of consolation and compliments. First, the fair sex cares about the impression she made on her chosen one. And then tries to find positive qualities in him.

List of the main character traits of an ideal partner from the point of view of women:

  • generosity;
  • sense of humor;
  • restraint;
  • honesty;
  • accuracy.

First of all, girls pay attention to the main quality - a man’s generosity. This doesn't just apply to gifts and dinners out. If a guy does not regret his free time and is ready to sacrifice meeting with friends for a romantic evening with a loving woman, then he can already be called an ideal option.

A sense of humor is also one of the worthy qualities of men. The ability to cheer up in a tense situation has always been valued by the fair sex. But crude jokes and sarcasm are not popular among women. Honesty is one of the most important qualities, because no one wants to be deceived. A sincere partner will always share his experiences and tell the whole truth.

Accuracy is also important in relationships. A man must be neat and well-groomed. No one likes a slob with dirty shoes and wrinkled clothes. At a minimum, the guy needs to shave, wash his hair and tidy up his suit. This also applies to family life. A real man will not throw away dirty clothes and leave unwashed dishes behind.

How to find a worthy man

Relationships between people - what they can be

When a woman has compiled a short list of requirements for a companion, the question arises: where to look for a potential chosen one. Many girls end up not understanding why they get the wrong guys.


You shouldn’t expect instant results, sometimes the search takes years

First of all, you need to decide on the meeting place. If a woman wants to live with a family man, then she should not look for him in nightclubs and specific establishments, for example, where they show striptease. It is better to pay attention to sports sections, tourism, etc.

If it is important for a woman that her partner earns a lot, then she can try restaurants, expensive fitness clubs, etc. For such places she will have to choose an appropriate image.

A good place to meet people is through events, for example, playing quizzes, quizzes, and board games. In such places it is easy to find a sociable person who will be the life of the party.

If a girl constantly comes across the same type of guys, then she needs to analyze her behavior. A person pays attention to another individual and does not think about why he does this. The choice occurs subconsciously, but you can try to figure out why this type is attracted to you.

For example, a girl had an authoritarian father. She will strive to find a tough and domineering person. This model is familiar to her. At the same time, she consciously tries to find a family-oriented and gentle man, but he seems weak and weak-willed to her. Only a psychologist can help you understand such intricacies.


Sometimes the problem lies in the fact that a woman quickly turns the relationship into an intimate one.

Sometimes a girl manages to find a partner the first time, in other cases she has to spend 4-5 years on this. Don't despair and expect quick results. If a tactic does not bring results, it needs to be changed.

It is possible to find the ideal man; for this, a woman will have to work hard. She needs to fit in and be worthy of a companion. Therefore, she should be attentive to her appearance, erudition, and career.

Qualities of an ideal guy

A real man can be recognized by his actions, not his words. This guy will definitely deliver what he promises. He is serious and responsible, but knows how to relax and have fun. A young man with such a character radiates optimism that infects those around him.

List of basic male qualities that attract attention:

  • equilibrium;
  • confidence;
  • independence;
  • determination;
  • kindness;
  • sociability;
  • loyalty;
  • romance.

One of the indicators of masculinity is physical strength. It is important that the guy can protect his beloved. Balance and self-confidence indicate that in an extreme situation the young man will not get confused, but will act. A man who throws tantrums and creates scandals is unlikely to please women. A confident guy immediately impresses the ladies; he gives a feeling of stability and reliability.

An independent man knows how to plan his affairs and effectively manages his work and free time. He will be able to solve difficult problems and is not afraid to take responsibility. Only a purposeful guy becomes successful. The ability to set new standards for yourself and achieve them is a valuable indicator. Even if plans fail, a man must remain calm and not give up on his goals.

Kindness is about showing mercy and compassion. A good attitude towards children and animals indicates that the guy has achieved inner harmony and is ready to start a family. A sociable person has many friends and acquaintances who will not leave you in difficult times. You won’t be bored with such a man, because he can carry on any conversation.

What women fear most is betrayal. For them, an important quality of guys is loyalty. If a young man does not flirt with his friends, does not hide his phone, and is happy to introduce a girl to his friends and relatives, then he is serious. A woman sees such a man as her future husband; she will not be afraid to give birth to children from him.

Representatives of the fairer sex cannot live without romance. They demand moonlit walks, compliments, candlelit dinners and lovely gifts from their chosen ones. This is truly important for women, because they perceive such signs of attention as an expression of sincere feelings.

Let's paint a portrait of perfection!

List of qualities that should be present in the appearance of an ideal man:

  • Beautiful smile. Oddly enough, women most often pay attention first to the smile as an aspect of a man’s appearance. She attracts most girls much more than muscles or height.
  • By the way, muscles come in second place. Broad shoulders, a narrow pelvis and defined muscles also attract women, but not as much as a beautiful smile.
  • Many young ladies are unable to resist a certain eye color of a man. Some “melt” with blue eyes, others have a weakness for brown or green ones. But, you must admit, by looking into his eyes, you can really “drown” in them and completely forget what you just asked him about.
  • It turns out that slightly crooked legs are also a sign of male attractiveness for women. It is quite difficult to understand the reasons for this phenomenon, however, the fact remains. What is a nightmare, horror and widespread suffering for a woman is a kind of “highlight” for a man.
  • The portrait of an ideal man is often complemented by the fact that brunettes are loved much more than blondes. Maybe because “dark” men look much more brutal and masculine than “light” ones.
  • A rough, deep voice is also defined as a necessary quality for an ideal man. An ideal man should be able to captivate you with his voice so that you definitely won’t run away from him. Just one word from him should make you want to follow him anywhere!
  • Some young ladies, by the way, like a little femininity in a man’s appearance. It is believed that such a “male” will become an excellent head of the family, will not cheat, will be a diligent family man and the father of future children. This is exactly what women are looking for in everyday life. Therefore, many of us choose a man whose appearance necessarily contains certain feminine traits. This could be softness and tenderness in the eyes, or chiseled jawlines, or a minimum of body hair.
  • Yes, the description of an ideal man very often includes a point according to which a man should have a minimum amount of hair on his body. Not all women like “woolly mammoths.” And, as a rule, smooth skin attracts young ladies much more than thick hair on a man’s body.

Negative traits

A woman is repulsed by unpleasant character traits. Although in the first days of dating a man tries to make a favorable impression and present himself in the best light, with closer communication the girl will understand that this is a pretense. But often representatives of the stronger sex hide their true nature until the wedding itself, then serious problems begin in the family.

Negative qualities that guys may have:

  • irresponsibility;
  • laziness;
  • coarseness;
  • greed;
  • lack of will;
  • imbalance;
  • lack of goals.

Reluctance to take responsibility will lead a man to the point that he will not be able to move up the career ladder and will not want to have children or even pets. A woman will have to solve all problems herself. A lazy person will find 100 reasons to do nothing. He will do his job poorly, refuse to take on household responsibilities and help the girl.

Rudeness usually appears after several years spent together. Partners tire of each other, tenderness disappears. But there are men who behave cruelly always and with everyone. At first this may attract a woman, but later it will become her main fear. A rude guy is even capable of beating a girl and his children, because he considers them just adjectives to himself, and not individual personalities.

Greed is immediately visible - a man cannot pay for dinner in a restaurant, asks for money for a taxi, comes to a birthday without a gift, never gives flowers. If such a characteristic coincides with the guy’s behavior, then it is better to leave him immediately. After all, in family life, a man will save on everything - food, clothing, travel, his wife and even children.

Weak-willed people move from one addiction to another. Usually, spineless guys live with their parents for a long time, and then look for a wife who looks like their mother. They do not have personal opinions, desires, dreams, which are inherent in a man with character.

The imbalance will later turn into frequent outbursts of aggression and even physical violence. The inability to restrain emotions will negatively affect family life. And the lack of determination hinders the development of both partners. If a man does not want to develop and reach new heights, then the woman will stand still, since she has no one to follow, no one to improve herself for.

The ideal man through the eyes of men

A survey on the parameters of a man’s ideality showed that not all representatives of the stronger sex are ready to answer:

  • Everything is individual, different criteria
  • Never thought about it
  • It's hard to say right away
  • There are no ideals

Young people are more inclined to evaluate women, although there are also those who work on themselves, develop their personality, and know what parameters to strive for. This probably depends on the person’s upbringing and awareness. It’s interesting that older men are ready to give a clear answer.

So, the ideal man through the eyes of men:

  • Confident, the support of the family - having confidence helps to cope with the difficulties of life, to be a reliable support for your wife and children, and is ready to take responsibility for yourself and your family.
  • Strong in character and spirit - a real man does not give up, does not give in to difficulties, is ready to stand up for his family and overcome any adversity.
  • Self-sufficient, able to provide for his family - the ideal man stands confidently on his feet, can provide for his family and growing children. Independence is also important for building a family.
  • A responsible spouse is ready to raise finances in any way , and in difficult times - to work as a taxi driver, engage in trade, and other types of work. He remembers the interests of the family and does not give in to difficulties.
  • Physically strong, courageous - it is important to be strong and ready to protect the family, to be the head of the family. A real man plays sports not for beauty, but to develop strength and fighting spirit, acquiring masculinity.
  • A good family man is an ideal husband who is devoted to his family, strives to help his wife in difficult periods of life, and shares joys and sorrows. He is not afraid of homework or walking with small children.
  • It is important to take part in family affairs as much as possible : raising children, household chores, doing housework. A real man knows how to fix a faucet, nail a shelf, and provide good comfortable living conditions.
  • Well-mannered, a gentleman - the ideal young man knows the rules of etiquette: he shakes hands with a lady when getting out of a vehicle, is polite in communication, knows how to say pleasant words and compliments. Of course, a strong man strives to be a leader, but he also allows the lady to make choices and participate in discussions. He knows how to tactfully express his own point of view, appealing to arguments.

So, the ideal man through the eyes of men has fewer criteria than the women’s list and includes the most important parameters. A woman next to such a companion feels happy. He is strong in spirit and body, confident, takes care of his family and his beloved wife. Girls dream of confidence and peace in life.

Note that the stronger sex does not prioritize physical beauty. They often forget about the absence of bad habits, they think: a couple of glasses of beer with friends on the weekends is not a big deal if everything else is fine. If everything is in moderation, then a woman can accept this option.

Beauty, indeed, is not obligatory for a life partner; what attracts more is the strength, confidence, and reliability of a person to create a family and have children. The girl feels that such a chosen one will be a wonderful father, a family man.

What about a sense of humor? Of course, this is an attractive feature for girls, but guys don’t highlight it as a must-have. Usually, in a state of love, the mood goes off scale, and jokes arise on their own, as a result of pleasant communication. Even phlegmatic people become sociable and cheerful. It would be nice to please your beloved in the future with kind words and smiles. Young people suggested adding the following qualities to the list of the ideal man through the eyes of men:

  • He does not like to discuss others, to gossip - indeed, a worthy person does not stoop to discussing other people, especially ex-girlfriends. A confident man does not use black PR; he would rather tell about his special advantages than criticize his past girlfriends. Everyone has their own life, divergent paths, different interests - this is normal;
  • Complements the girl’s ideality - the answer suggests: the guy’s girlfriend is ideal, and he strives to keep up, helps her to be better - and develops himself. A very interesting approach to life: love your spouse, try to be the best;
  • Versatile, interesting in communication - of course, mutual interest arises if people are interested in each other, have common hobbies and topics. It is useful to learn more, read, listen to different music, navigate various issues to maintain a conversation, find out the girl’s areas of interest;
  • Beloved - a person becomes ideal, feeling the love of a girl, strives to reveal the best qualities, because love is a stimulus for development. It often helps a person to look at the world differently, give up bad habits, develop useful ones, learn to give: to care, show tenderness and attention to his beloved;
  • He is in good physical shape - the ideal young man looks courageous and athletic. He goes to the gym, takes care of his figure, health, and proper nutrition. This ensures energy and success.

The study “The Ideal Man Through the Eyes of Men” showed that the guys understand the main values ​​and priorities in life. Often the vision of an ideal man is formed by the mother in the process of upbringing, the example of her own family. It is enough to look at a person’s parents to understand the basic values ​​​​cultivated in the family. There are also opposite situations - children strive for their own ideals if they have negative life experiences.

Partly, women themselves create ideal men by raising sons . However, the example of a good father will always help a teenager find himself and understand how important it is to be a worthy person in life. The question of the existence of an ideal man is rather rhetorical, but it is worth striving for the ideal, because, having guidelines, it is easier to follow the road of life.

Often young people want to find the ideal woman, they know the criteria for a future companion, and do not think about their own life values. What should I do? Psychologists say: become an ideal man - you will have the opportunity to choose among the best women and fans.

The ideal man through the eyes of men is confident, strong, follows his heart, and is not afraid of difficulties. He is able to provide a comfortable life for his family, active, working for results. Ready to take care of the family and be a support for it.

So, the ideal man through the eyes of men has common ideas with women’s views, differing only on a few points: bad habits, fidelity, tenderness .
Some respondents believe that they are polygamous by nature, low-alcohol drinks are “not a problem,” and they equate tenderness with passion. As a result, difficulties may arise in future family life. A woman's wish list is more extensive, is it possible to meet the ideal man in life?

Three main advantages

Although women's ideal male images differ, there are qualities that each would like to see in her chosen one. These are the three most important advantages of a real man:

  • reliability;
  • call of Duty;
  • generosity.

The greatest strength of any guy is reliability. A woman is subject to emotions, she can be upset and happy several times a day. That is why in a family the man is considered the point of balance. He guides his chosen one, smoothes out sharp swings in her mood, calms her hysterics, and does not allow her to make a row over nonsense. A reliable person will help, even if he is offended by the girl.

You can notice this quality from the first date. A man will take the initiative - choose a walking route, a dish in a restaurant, but at the same time he will take into account the opinion of his companion. He will always warn you about departure and important matters, answer all your questions, and keep your promises.

A sense of duty is considered an old-fashioned concept, but women continue to value it today. Love makes men do good deeds. At the same time, they show care for those with whom they have connected their lives. But a guy may not have the most pleasant relationship with his wife’s relatives, and this is where a sense of duty is needed. Thanks to him, the young man behaves decently and smoothes out conflict situations.

Generosity is sometimes considered a weakness. But in fact, this concept is a description of inner strength. Such men will never offend the weak and defenseless ; they will take care of them. Conflicts with higher ranks are allowed in order to defend justice and one’s own righteousness. But a generous guy simply cannot hit, insult, or humiliate a weak animal, woman or child in any way.

The ideal man in different countries - what is he like?2

A British research center decided to conduct an interesting study that was supposed to accurately answer the question about the ideal man. But the survey was carried out not among representatives of the fair sex from one country, but from 19 at once. In this way, it was possible to understand what the ideal of a man is in different countries.

Representatives from each country were given a photograph of an overweight man. This photo was allowed to be changed in any way using Photoshop. It was even allowed to change hair and skin color.

The countries that agreed to take part in the experiment were the following - Great Britain, USA, Venezuela, Australia, Bangladesh, China, Serbia, South Africa, Spain, Colombia, Croatia, Egypt, Philippines, Portugal, Russia, Indonesia, Macedonia, Nigeria, Pakistan.

Almost all, with the exception of Australia, Serbia and Pakistan, have changed the figure of the man in the photo. So, for example, representatives from the UK and China made the guy thin, and the rest added muscles to him. Representatives from Bangladesh, along with external changes, also decided to change the clothes of the man in the photo, and the Serbs decorated him with a tattoo.

Representatives from Russia made the guy in the photo muscular and strong, and made his hair long and blond, which was a little reminiscent of a hero from a fairy tale.

Everyone has their own concept of beauty and therefore there is no exact ideal of a man. All men are ideal in their own way and this is their charm, because everyone can meet someone who, together with him, will see his ideal features and help him skillfully hide his flaws.

List of qualities that a real man should have

The main personal qualities of a young man is a big question, the answer to which humanity has not been able to find for centuries. These features vary from ethnic group to ethnic group and from era to era. The image of an ideal man is influenced by social paradigms, the mental trends of society, and, in general, the mentality and position of the country in which this same man is located.

On dating sites, guys try to show themselves from different sides and appear richer, smarter, stronger. You really have to be real.

Masculinity, which ruled the show for many decades, is now gradually fading into the background. The framework of human perception is becoming wider and freer, and the requirements are becoming less strict. However, it makes sense to look at those qualities that will always be in price.

We give as an example 50 positive qualities and advantages of men. Don't try to become superman overnight and change dramatically so that you can get them all at once. This is a rough list to give you some direction. Try on the qualities for yourself: any of them will have a positive impact on people’s perception of you, but you won’t want to acquire any of them. Be careful and don’t lose yourself in pursuit of the ideal:

  1. Responsibility
  2. Self confidence
  3. Ability to solve emerging problems
  4. The ability to anticipate at least some of the problems that may arise
  5. Independence
  6. The ability to keep your word
  7. Perseverance and the ability to get things done
  8. Accuracy in business
  9. Ability to finish what you start, perseverance in the face of obstacles
  10. Honesty to yourself and others
  11. The ability to refuse firmly, but without rudeness
  12. Kindness and generosity
  13. Mercy and the ability to forgive
  14. Attention to detail: both in appearance and in deeds
  15. Ability to take care of loved ones
  16. Empathy and the ability to support a person who is having a hard time or is feeling bad
  17. Relaxation and tranquility
  18. Good sense of humour
  19. Ability to get along with people
  20. Ability to analyze and form one’s own point of view
  21. Ability to control anger
  22. Emotional balance: the ability to express emotions correctly and in a timely manner
  23. Straightforwardness without bordering on rudeness
  24. Self-sufficiency
  25. Ability to make gifts
  26. Spontaneity, ability to make pleasant surprises and gifts
  27. Ability to give compliments
  28. Wide range of interests and mastery in several areas
  29. Well delivered speech
  30. The ability to set goals, knowledge of one’s needs and desires
  31. Ability to hold conversations on various topics
  32. Attention to the interlocutor
  33. Active listening
  34. Ability to maintain eye contact during conversation
  35. Sense of style
  36. Ability to dress appropriately for the occasion
  37. Neatness in appearance, well-groomed
  38. Attractiveness, sexuality
  39. The ability to enjoy and be inspired by the successes of others
  40. Charisma
  41. The ability to show individuality and its presence
  42. Tendency to compromise, ability to negotiate
  43. Charm
  44. Quality orientation, ability and inclination to choose the best available
  45. Honor
  46. Devotion
  47. Ability to trust and justify trust
  48. Self confidence
  49. Respect for others
  50. Strength of will

The Gentleman's Handbook: The Masculine Qualities Women Value Most

When setting a goal to please a specific girl, it is better to find out her personal vision of the ideal man - it may not coincide with the general image that is written about in articles and books. But if you want to become more attractive to women in general or try on the image of an alpha male, focus on these strong qualities that a man should have. We tell you in detail about the five main ones and remind you about fifteen additional ones.

  1. Responsibility. This word means a lot: the ability to take it upon oneself, and the ability to recognize and know when and on whom it lies. A man who does not take responsibility is unlikely to become a reliable partner for a woman. Anyone who takes responsibility for everything that happens around or even in the world will sooner or later become so tired of carrying it that he will lose the strength for any other activity.
  2. Strength of will. Here, too, everything is not easy: it is not only about the ability to overcome any difficulties, but also the ability to pull yourself together in a stressful situation, navigate, get out of it yourself and help others. There is also the ability to adhere to the chosen path and principles and promises made.
  3. Sense of humor. A man who is too serious is boring - even if he knows a lot, is responsible and is the very stone wall that many girls are so eager to hide behind. The ability to make a sparkling joke is a great way to win anyone’s sympathy, defuse a difficult situation, and support any conversation. People who know how to joke and are capable of self-irony are always valued and welcome in any company.
  4. Care. It consists of several factors - this is help, support, and banal covering with a blanket and help in cooking or paying for groceries. Caring works wonders: it allows loved ones to relax in your company and feel comfortable. Don't worry about people riding around imposingly on your neck: we enjoy taking care of those who take care of us in return.
  5. Reliability. Stable income, absence of hysterics, ability to act in stressful situations - this is all reliability: a quality that allows others to see in you a man they can rely on. Reliable people are perceived as those who will insure in case of troubles and will not cause additional troubles because of some trifles.

15 more positive qualities of a modern guy:

  1. Openness
  2. Sociability
  3. Physical strength
  4. Spirituality
  5. Tendency to self-development
  6. Kindness
  7. Temperament and passion
  8. Interest in what's happening around you
  9. Love for your business
  10. Curiosity
  11. High intelligence
  12. Broad outlook
  13. Loyalty
  14. Courage
  15. Neatness
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