Stress after childbirth: why I cry after the birth of a child, what to do, treatment

The hardest part is over - you successfully survived the birth and are now at home, and the baby is fast asleep in her crib. Your husband is crazy with happiness and loves you even more. Relatives and friends pour in congratulations and gifts. In a word, live and be happy. And you want to cry. You feel anxiety that comes from nowhere. It seems as if something is about to happen, and all the good things will dissolve like a dream. Don't be alarmed, you are not the only one this happens to. All women experience such sensations in the first few days after childbirth.

However, in ~50% of women this depressed state drags on and ceases to resemble ordinary sadness or worry. This condition is called postpartum depression. In women, it can manifest itself to a lesser or greater extent, for a short time or last for many months. Postpartum depression occurs in 50% of women, and in 13% it is severe.

Postpartum depression is a painful condition of a woman after childbirth, characterized by depressed mood, tearfulness, reluctance to see her child, and reversible mental disorders. In most cases, PD is not too severe, but in severe cases, the mother may even have a desire to kill herself or the child. Such women require treatment in special institutions.

Video No. 1: About postpartum depression

Features of postpartum stress

Every expectant mother who is looking forward to the birth of her baby experiences a lot of stress. The experience is caused by several factors at once: excess weight gain, changes at the hormonal level, decreased levels of estrogen and progesterone. It is because of this that the expectant mother becomes irritable and changeable in mood.

One of the most powerful stress factors is childbirth itself.

The fact is that during childbirth, a woman experiences enormous physical and emotional stress. In most women, this causes cases of depression, which goes away after 1-2 weeks. But sometimes this condition of a woman drags on and becomes chronic. Psychologists are sure that it is very difficult for a young mother to cope with the signs of stress on her own.

Sometimes you need not only the support of loved ones, but also psychological help.

Postpartum depression, psychosis and baby blues: working on your mood

Most women have heard stories about changes in the mood of young mothers immediately after the birth of the baby, which is called “postpartum depression.”

Until recently, doctors practically did not study this problem, and pregnant women themselves rarely prepare to face such changes in their own emotional sphere. Indeed, it is difficult to imagine what kind of depression and postpartum depression we can talk about when you so want to see your long-awaited baby as soon as possible and plunge into the joyful cares of him.

Mood after childbirth: from laughter to tears - one step?

What happens to a woman’s psychological state after the baby is born? Usually, childbirth is accompanied by an incomparable feeling of euphoria, emotional uplift, when it seems that the world is beautiful and there is enough strength to move mountains. This feeling of relief and satisfaction can last from several days to a couple of months, but along with it, most young mothers note temporary tearfulness and a feeling of disappointment that overtakes them while still in the maternity hospital. In the first days, very often tears can be caused by any trifle or small problem, and the mood after childbirth changes for no apparent reason. This is due to hormonal changes after childbirth and changes in a woman’s lifestyle and worldview. Physiological changes in the body of a young mother, as well as the need for the psyche to rebuild and adapt to new circumstances, lead to sharp mood swings from irritability to despondency and depression, from a burst of energy to complete apathy. Such surges and changes, due to the physical and emotional efforts expended during pregnancy and childbirth, are normal if they pass within a few days.

At the same time, you need to understand that it is better to keep any emotional changes under observation in order to be able to notice conditions that require help or mandatory intervention. Even postpartum euphoria, accompanied by an increase in energy, should be treated with caution, especially when it takes on hypertrophied forms. Outwardly, a young mother may seem absolutely happy, but if you look closely at her behavior, it is easy to notice that she is too excited, anxious, overly energetic and sleeps little. Increased energy consumption and lack of proper rest in the first weeks after childbirth can lead to sudden exhaustion and loss of strength and, as a result, a sharp decrease in mood, uncertainty, worry and anxiety.

Mood after childbirth: treat or ignore?

Mood swings after childbirth can be divided into three groups, differing in the severity of manifestations and the severity of consequences.

Postpartum melancholy, or baby blues. Postpartum sadness syndrome appears in the first week after childbirth and is accompanied by tearfulness, emotional instability, fatigue and a feeling of despondency. Postpartum melancholy usually does not lead to crisis manifestations and goes away within a few weeks on its own, without requiring any treatment. However, this does not mean that the first signs of emotional disturbances should be ignored. During the postpartum period, a woman needs the help of family and loved ones more than ever to balance her mental state. A woman affected by postpartum depression suffers from increasing sensitivity to external and internal stimuli, depression, apathy and inertia, but if you do not ignore your nervous state, immersing yourself in everyday activities and forgetting about rest, give yourself the opportunity to discuss the problems that have arisen. , these mood changes pass quite quickly and painlessly.

Exhaustion and postpartum depression. Although emotional instability affects most women during the postpartum period, some experience symptoms so severe that they make it difficult to carry out daily activities. Postpartum depression can begin at any time during the first year of a baby's life, last several years and be quite difficult to resolve. A few months after giving birth, a woman may begin to experience headaches, gastrointestinal disorders, and constant chills. These are signs of postpartum exhaustion, which can turn into depression if it is accompanied by emotional distress, lack of confidence in one’s own abilities and that she is a good mother. The consequences of postpartum depression are quite serious. A woman may stop experiencing the joy of motherhood, lose interest and the ability to have fun, and become helpless in solving everyday issues. Signs of depression can also include loss of appetite, sleep disturbances, a gloomy vision of the future, sloppiness, difficulty concentrating, provoking conflict situations in the family, etc. It may seem to others that the young mother is simply careless and inexperienced, capricious or feeling sorry for herself, but in fact she may be depressed. This condition requires support and help from loved ones, and sometimes consultation with specialists.

Postpartum psychosis. This is a fairly rare condition that can occur in the first few weeks after birth. Postpartum psychosis is a consequence of physical, mental and hormonal overload. It is characterized by a loss of contact with reality, a complete inability to care for oneself and the child, severe excitement and anxiety. A woman who begins postpartum psychosis may experience severe fear, suffer from insomnia, persecution mania, various kinds of addictions, and hallucinations. She may have a desire to do something to herself or the child. This condition requires immediate medical intervention and psychiatric care, and the sooner treatment is started, the greater the chance of a speedy recovery.

Causes of postpartum emotional crisis

It is impossible to identify any universal and clear reasons for the development of postpartum emotional problems, since each woman has a unique set of personal and physiological characteristics. And, of course, everyone’s situation is different. However, there are factors that contribute to the occurrence of this condition.

Predisposition to depression. This can be either a hereditary feature or an individual one. In any case, if a woman is prone to emotional disturbances or had psychological problems before pregnancy, then the likelihood of depression after childbirth increases.

Hormonal changes after childbirth. Perhaps this reason is considered to be decisive in the development of postpartum emotional disorders. The hormonal background of a young mother changes significantly, and these changes for the most part do not occur smoothly and gradually, but sharply and quickly. The level of hormones that go off scale during pregnancy drops to normal values within a few days, the level of other hormones increases rapidly, and the value of some hormones decreases during childbirth, but increases sharply in the first days after the birth of the baby. Such changes in hormonal levels cause natural mood swings in women.
Personal conflict. Sometimes depressive reactions can be associated with deep-seated personal problems of a woman. Often a young mother experiences difficulties in accepting her new role, caused by emotional and physical fatigue or unpreparedness for the role of a mother. It may be difficult for a woman to come to terms with the fact that the birth of a baby imposes a number of responsibilities and restrictions on her. She begins to realize that her usual way of life is changing dramatically, and this conflict between the new role and the usual demands that she has to give up provokes a feeling of dissatisfaction with life and depression. Difficulty adapting to the role of mother in such a situation is a possible cause of postpartum depression.
Stress. The birth of a child in itself is a stressful event because it is accompanied by great joy and excitement. But, besides this, childbirth and the postpartum period are also a colossal burden for a woman’s body and her psyche: physical fatigue, restless intermittent sleep, worries about the baby, being alone without the support of loved ones... Individually, each of these factors cannot lead to postpartum depression as a reaction to stress, but together they often cause emotional disturbances. It happens that in a woman’s life, simultaneously with the birth of a child, other stressful situations occur: loss of loved ones, unplanned or difficult changes in lifestyle (change of job, place of residence), conflicts with a spouse or relatives, etc.

How can I help a woman with postpartum depression?

If a woman nevertheless had to deal with postpartum emotional changes and she or her loved ones notice that negative manifestations only intensify over time and affect the young mother’s lifestyle, she should begin the fight against postpartum depression as soon as possible.

The best way to defeat this disease is proper rest. A young mother needs to reconsider her views on everyday affairs and limit herself to only those household chores that are really necessary. Basically, the mother’s task during this period is to focus on caring for the child and herself. So use your baby's bedtime to get enough sleep so the world won't look so dark. Do not neglect the help of your husband, family and friends. If you have the opportunity to delegate your responsibilities, do so. Once the emotional distress passes, you will be able to handle things on your own again.

Regularly give yourself a day off when you can, for example, go shopping, meet a friend, or get a manicure. Try to walk more, and not by pushing the stroller around the house, but by choosing new routes and interesting places. A change of environment is an indispensable aid in the fight against depression.

Do not withdraw into yourself and do not concentrate on your experiences. Look for support in your environment, tell your loved ones about your condition, experiences, and feelings. The ability to express emotions is an important condition for freeing yourself from them, and it will be easier for people around you to understand you if they know what is happening to you. Focus on the most grateful listener - your baby. Communicate with him more, because it has been proven that mothers who have a close emotional connection with their child are less likely to suffer from depression.

And finally, the most important thing in the fight against serious emotional disorders - do not hesitate to contact a specialist if you feel that something is wrong with you. An experienced psychologist will help you understand the causes of the disorder, listen and be able to recommend methods aimed at reducing depression and anxiety, and a psychiatrist, if necessary, will select drug therapy depending on the severity of the condition.

Remember that the health and development of the child depends on a woman’s self-perception as a mother. Therefore, it is so important to pay attention to your psychological state, to respond promptly and adequately to emotional signals given by your own psyche.

How to prevent emotional disturbances after childbirth?

It is important to understand that any, even the most severe, postpartum depression can be successfully treated. But, despite this, it is much more productive to apply some measures to help prevent emotional swings in the postpartum period.

Prepare well for childbirth and motherhood. Choose a maternity hospital in advance, talk to the medical staff, and prepare for possible emergency situations during childbirth to reduce the stress associated with the birth of the baby and being in an unfamiliar environment in the maternity hospital. Try to get as much information as possible about caring for a newborn baby to make adaptation to the new role easier. It would be useful to attend special courses for expectant mothers.
Properly plan the necessary serious matters. For example, if you are planning a move or renovation, it is better to do this in advance of the birth or postpone these activities for several months after the birth of the baby, when you can already get back into your usual routine.
Find the right pediatrician for you in advance. A timely visit to such a specialist will help a woman significantly reduce excitement and anxiety about the baby and prevent a decrease in her own self-esteem due to a feeling of self-doubt as a mother.
Enlist the support of your husband and other loved ones. In the first time after childbirth, you will need to recover and gain strength, so help will be very helpful, and it is better if you find helpers in advance and distribute responsibilities between them. This approach will protect you from unnecessary fuss in the postpartum period and will help avoid overwork and nervous tension.
Find hobbies and interests that you can continue after childbirth. Favorite hobbies, communication with friends - all those activities that you would not have to give up after the birth of your baby will help you avoid the feeling of a collapsed world and social isolation.

Causes of stress in women after pregnancy

With the birth of a baby, a woman’s life completely changes. She needs to get used to a new social role. Adaptation proceeds differently for everyone. For some, the negative psycho-emotional state goes away on the first or third day after the birth of the baby. For others, it worsens and becomes chronic, becoming one of the causes of possible stress.

Depression from chronic fatigue

No less often stress occurs:

Due to the unpreparedness of young girls for the process of childbirth. More often this applies to those women who give birth to their first child. Unpreparedness of a psycho-emotional nature, as well as the unpredictable scenario of the birth itself, contributes to emotional stress.
Health problems in a woman or baby.
Lack of experience in handling a newborn, which is often present in young mothers.
Problems with parental responsibility due to the fact that the person’s psyche is not ready for a new role.
Worries about problems with excess weight and a changed figure.
No less rarely, a tense situation in the family can affect the emotional state of a young mother.

The first weeks after the birth of a baby are the most difficult for his parents. The child often screams and does not sleep at night. For his parents, this is a period of lack of sleep, nervousness and conflicts arising from nervousness. As a result, the girl receives a lot of negative emotions from the outside, already suffering from stress after childbirth.

Psychologists tried to draw “parallels” with the stressful state of young mothers and their psycho-emotional state before pregnancy, during menstruation. Based on the results of numerous surveys and experiments, it was possible to find out that those girls who suffered from stress during menstruation before giving birth were in this condition after pregnancy.

Bright lights and sounds

You need to immediately think about what room your baby will be in: is there no bright sun shining through the window, are there any loud sounds there?

Since you often have to get up in the middle of the night with a newborn, it is advisable to purchase a night light

to turn on not a chandelier, but a calm, dim light. During all procedures (bathing, feeding, changing), the light should also not shine into the child’s eyes.

It is believed that a baby can sleep peacefully to loud noises, but this is not true. This is not a dream, but an extreme inhibition of the psyche, when it cannot stand it and defends itself. Many people have a question: what to do if a dog barks loudly at home? If the child constantly heard this barking while in the womb, he will easily adapt and will actually be able to sleep at this time.

Symptoms of stress

Postpartum stress often appears as early as the second week after the baby is born. The first symptoms of a stressful state are:

irritability;
changeable mood;
apathy;
fatigue.

Symptoms of Postpartum Stress

Psychologists say that such signs in the mother are considered mild and disappear within the first 2-3 weeks. The new emotional load gradually becomes part of the girl’s real life. She manages to overcome difficulties and gets used to the new routine and activities. But, if this condition drags on, other symptoms of stress may appear, which experts call severe:

depression;
attacks of aggression;
hostility towards the baby.

Hair loss after childbirth

When a young mother becomes depressed, her maternal instinct fades. She is unable to cope with difficulties, so she wants to “run away” from them. This condition is comparable to a nervous breakdown. The girl systematically throws tantrums, behaves selfishly and aggressively not only towards her husband, but also towards the child.

Attacks of aggression are a symptom

New type of food

The few hours for which a child is taken away from his mother after his birth are terrible for him. Both because of the separation and because of the feeling of hunger that he had never experienced, as already said.

While in the womb, the baby ate every second, so in order for the adaptation to be as painless as possible for him, he should initially be fed on demand and left at the breast for as long as he wants.

Some mothers feel as if they have turned into just a breast for the baby, and he eats and eats constantly, not giving her a break. But by the age of one year he will eat only 4-5 times a day. And in order to achieve this, he needs to gradually start eating less often until he learns to endure and wait, and his body has rebuilt itself.

Consequences of postpartum stress

Cases of depression, like other signs of postpartum stress, do not go away without leaving a trace. A woman’s body suffers from hormonal changes. And this also affects the baby who is breastfed. The fact is that the synthesis of enzymes contained in milk originates in the pituitary gland. With stress, adrenaline is released into the blood, which forces this part of the brain to restructure itself and work according to a “new program.”

The result of such influence is obvious. With changes in hormonal levels, the quality and quantity of breast milk decreases. Such signs should force the young mother to change her emotional background. If there is no action, it is possible that the milk will completely disappear and the baby will need to be switched to artificial feeding.

There is also a threat to women's health. Often, the consequences of a negative psycho-emotional state are lactostasis and mastitis.

The reason is uneven contraction of the ducts and problems with the outflow of mammary gland secretions.

Lactostasis and mastitis

How to cope with stress after having a baby

No one knows how your life will change when a small child appears in it. You may think you have a good idea about this and smile serenely when friends warn you about sleepless nights, endless diaper changes and crying babies. Until you have your own experience, you will not be able to understand how this happens
. Women who previously had time to restructure a multinational corporation before the lunch break now look completely exhausted: they still haven’t gotten dressed or cleaned up by lunchtime, and they don’t have enough time to run to the nearest store for milk. If this sounds like you, don’t think that you are alone and that motherhood has changed only your life in this way. Of course, this happens to most women who have recently become mothers.

If you have problems with milk

If you fail to cope with the new emotional load, there is no time to waste. It is necessary to take appropriate measures to improve the emotional background and normalize milk production. The first thing to take care of:

Relax and stop being nervous. Here you should ask your loved ones for help.
You should limit yourself from household chores.
Nipple stimulation. You need to put your baby to your breast as often as possible or use mechanical or electric breast pumps. While stimulation continues, the milk will not disappear.

You need to tune in only to a favorable result, without getting nervous or subject to despair.

The main thing is to prevent a re-release of adrenaline into the blood, which can destroy attempts to restore lactation. It is important to restore the maternal instinct, which becomes weak under stress. It is important to be close to the baby as often as possible, to hold him close to you, to rest next to him, etc.

Husband's support is very important

You can also contact a doctor. Today, nutritional supplements and vitamins that help restore lactation are widely used. But their use will not be effective if the girl does not limit herself from intense nervous activity.

Symptoms

Postpartum stress manifests itself on the first or third day after the birth of the baby. Starting to care for a newborn requires effort, the woman experiences anxiety, and sometimes complete rejection of her child. Experts distinguish between mild and severe stress after childbirth.

With a mild form of stress, the mother experiences tearfulness, irritability, mood swings, and fatigue. At the same time, she is sensitive to the newborn, but cannot cope with the new emotional load. If the course is favorable, the symptoms go away and the woman enters a new direction in life.

Severe stress is less common and symptoms last much longer. A woman who has given birth experiences irresistible apathy, cannot approach the child, take him in her arms, and feels aggression towards him. The emotional background is depressed, the woman is on the verge of a breakdown. In this case, you cannot do without the consultation and support of a specialist; you need psychological help.

How to deal with postpartum stress

When a young mother is suddenly overtaken by stress, she should calm down as quickly as possible and get rid of negative emotions, otherwise this may affect both the mother’s health and lactation. Therefore, in such situations, psychologists advise:

create a comfortable environment at home (relatives should support the girl);
take a warm bath or shower;
drink a glass of mulled wine;
Rest more next to your child, especially when it comes to sleep;
do yoga or breathing exercises that help relax the body;
make time for walks with your family.

The main goal of these measures is to get rid of the influence of stressors on the body. And the sooner this is done, the better for the mother and her baby. There is no need to be afraid to cry. After all, tears are a protective reaction of the body. With their help, he fights against external threats. There is no point in resisting this.

Consulting a psychologist is very useful

The only thing that is prohibited is playing sports. After pregnancy, training can negatively affect lactation.

Temperature and smell

In the first month of life, the baby loves warmth very much. And if it’s cold at home, he spends all the energy he gets from food to keep warm. The temperature at home should be such that an adult can comfortably walk around in a T-shirt and shorts, but a child, in addition to a diaper, needs a cap and socks. If the house is very hot, then a vest and a light diaper are enough.

When the baby has eaten and fallen asleep, before you transfer him from your arms to the cradle, you need to warm it up: put a bottle of hot water, a heating pad, and heat it with an iron. But it’s even better to lie down with your child on the sofa and crawl out from under him, leaving him with your heated robe, which smells like milk, and cover it with a blanket.

In general, smell is very important

. Therefore, you will get much more free time if you put some of your unwashed underwear in the cradle: a nightgown, a bra.

Some advice from psychologists

If you couldn’t overcome stress on your own or prevent it, then don’t be upset. You can go to a psychologist who will find out the main reasons for the woman’s experiences and help return her to a normal psycho-emotional state. Most often, only one appointment with a psychologist is required, since young mothers do not have time for long sessions with a specialist.

Yoga meditation against depression

Psychologists often recommend to their patients:

Find a hobby that will help a woman relax, but not forget about her child. A good example is a photo collage made up of pictures of a baby with his mother, father and relatives. While making such a collage, a woman will be able to relax and pay attention to her child.
Move more. Walking in the fresh air is beneficial for both the baby and his mother. Walking promotes the production of endorphins (pleasure hormones).
Laugh more. If circumstances do not encourage a woman to laugh, she should spend time watching a comedy or TV show.
Rebuild your routine. The main causes of stress in women after childbirth include difficulties with time management. Before the birth of a child, a woman is accustomed to one regime, but with the advent of the baby everything changes. You need to adapt to the child.
Adjust the menu. A person’s vigor depends on his diet and diet. It is necessary to remove confectionery and semi-finished products from the diet. It is better to eat carbohydrates (porridge, pasta and vegetables) and protein (meat, cottage cheese, etc.). The main thing is to reduce your consumption of fatty foods.
The more time a young mother devotes to herself and her child, the stronger her resistance to stress will be. This means that she will be able to easily overcome all difficulties and even avoid them. The more time a woman spends with her baby, the more she feels like a mother, responsible not only for herself, but also for another person.

There is no need to bear the burden of responsibility and try to overcome difficulties on your own. Dads need to be involved too.

‚Moments of rest and relaxation

Their support is invaluable. Therefore, you should spend more time as a family, talking with each other, playing with the child, feeding and bathing him. And with such a favorable emotional background in the family, stress will not be so frequent and severe. In addition, the baby’s mental health will also be normal, because he will grow up in a family, where he is loved and appreciated, and his parents never fight.

Losing boundaries

The newborn can see how he suffers from being on the changing table without diapers. Within a minute he begins to move his arms and legs chaotically and scream. He is afraid to have no boundaries. If you just put your hands on him or hold him close to your body, he will calm down because he will get a boundary.

The baby is also very comfortable in diapers. But since he can’t always be in diapers when you unwaddle him, you can stroke him and at the same time talk about the purpose of different parts of his body.

Parents are required to create an environment around the child that most closely resembles the intrauterine world. If possible, give what was there, and gradually introduce them to the new world.

When choosing a sleeping place, you should always give preference to a cradle rather than a crib, because the crib is large. If there is no cradle, you can “build a nest”: cover the baby with pillows and towels so that he feels as close as possible. Well, the most pleasant option for him is to sleep with his mother. He is cramped (because he is swaddled), and warm, and smells like mom, and the sounds are also familiar: mom’s breathing and heartbeat.

By about one to one and a half months, the newborn masters space. He lies calmly, unswaddled, longer and longer when he is awake, resting his back on the surface. Pediatricians say that the child “has found an equilibrium position on a new support.”

Recovery after childbirth

It's no surprise that parenting isn't the endless carpet of roses we once imagined it to be. You have just experienced extreme emotional and physical stress during childbirth. Your hormonal levels are changing rapidly. You may be recovering from surgery, stitches, or suffering from pain. At the same time, you are trying to establish breastfeeding and constantly do not get enough sleep. The baby's dad may also be sleep deprived and feel helpless as he tries to juggle work and caring for his family.

Life after childbirth day by day

Daily life with a newborn can become chaotic. Not only are your eyes drooping from fatigue, but you are not even able to change clothes, since every time you are going to do this, the baby urgently needs to change the diaper. You want to take a bath and fill the bath, but the baby starts crying. When the baby finally calms down, the water in the bathroom has already cooled down. You're so busy breastfeeding that you forget to eat breakfast. You even forget your name.

However, amidst all this turmoil, you suddenly clearly realize that, with virtually no experience, you are responsible for the life of your baby, providing him with nutrition, comfort, care and protection 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. At the same time, you have to show the child to the doctors and monitor his weight gain, provide the baby with educational games and activities, prepare lunch, wash clothes... no wonder your head is spinning.