The candy-bouquet period and 6 more stages in the development of relationships in marriage


Many dictionaries give a cruel and unemotional definition of the word “courtship.” It is usually noted that all the feats that a man performs during the candy-bouquet period are aimed not just at gaining the attention of a woman, but at getting her into bed. In addition, the interpretation says that such a process requires that the gentleman please the lady in all her whims.

Courtship theory

For several thousand years, the rules of behavior during this phase have not changed significantly. The active side was always the man. His goal was to interest and attract a woman. This distribution of positions is due to the fact that the female is responsible for the offspring, therefore it is her choice that determines whether the couple will have healthy and strong children.

The first step has always remained the prerogative of the strong half of humanity. Even today, in the 21st century, only part of Europe and the North American continent have moved away from these stereotypes. There, the privilege of being the first to choose a companion is given to the lady.

Nature is the foundation that was laid during the candy-bouquet period. How long it lasts, in theory, depends on the woman. From time immemorial, the male’s goal was one thing - to move on to mating as soon as possible and look for the next “prey,” while for the opposite sex it was important to make sure that the potential partner was better than all other gentlemen.

Therefore, there is no point in being offended by men for seeking to find more partners. Their natural task is to organize mating with a given object and quickly move on to the next one. This system was imposed by nature, and even primitive people lived by such rules.

Love

Psychologists distinguish 7 stages of relationship development. The final seventh stage has a romantic name - love. This is the highest stage of a love relationship. During this period, the couple reaches complete mutual understanding; Spiritual closeness, deep trust in each other, warmth, and sincerity are established between partners. This is a great gift of fate that must be earned by going through the previous stages of the relationship.

Love is not a spontaneous feeling that arises at first sight, as many believe. Deep emotions come with the experience of past years. The Bible describes love in these words: merciful, long-suffering, not proud, not evil, not envious. This is an eternal feeling that can survive and endure everything.

Dating is the core of a relationship

Over the centuries, society has moved from polygamy to monogamy. Advanced civilizations increasingly turned to the institution of marriage. However, before 1700, marriage was perceived more as a business contract rather than a logical continuation of a love relationship. They walked down the aisle by agreement, and the girl left the guardianship of her father and was handed over to the tireless guidance of her husband.

The world learned about the candy-bouquet period during the period of women's emancipation. At this time, their rights increased, and the power of parents and life partners gradually decreased. It was then that the dates that form the basis of romantic relationships today arose.

The purpose of such meetings at present is not to make sure that the companion will be a good match for procreation, and not to find a partner with advantageous material wealth, but to make sure that the young people are suitable for each other.

Tolerance

Service, patience and respect are the stages of intimacy in a relationship. The stage of humility is replaced by a tense phase of disgust. Relationships are moving to a new level of development. Partners try to see what each really wants from each other. People stop adapting their chosen one to suit themselves and are increasingly trying to understand their soulmate. The problems that arise no longer seem so scary, and solving them together becomes more pleasant and fun.

At the stage of tolerance, lovers learn to understand and hear each other. Between partners, intimacy arises not only physical, but also spiritual. Psychologists note that at this stage of a relationship, people more often turn to specialists for help. They want to maintain the existing union and better understand their chosen one, so they read psychological literature and turn to psychologists for advice.

Laws and rituals

The candy-bouquet period is a kind of courtship stage, which is inherent by nature in the character of all intelligent beings. The theory of flirting is as old as human history.

In addition to natural needs, both parties involved in a relationship must obey certain principles. If in fish the courtship process is not complete without so-called dancing, and in insects - without singing, then humans have their own rituals.

One of them is to preen. The next feat, which, apparently, a man is completely ready for only during the period of courtship, is submission. He demonstrates to the woman his willingness to fulfill all her whims. That is why the candy-bouquet period is so sweet for young ladies and so unbearable for the stronger half of humanity. For her part, the lady plays the role of a defenseless and weak creature in order to develop a sense of self-confidence in her boyfriend.

Friendship and love

The sixth stage in the development of relationships between a man and a woman is strong friendship. How amazing is the feeling when people become truly close! They trust each other. That is why friendship is considered a very serious preparation for true love, because no love can survive without trust for a year.

The seventh (and final) stage on such a bright path to perfection is true love. You need to know that real feeling is not easy. It takes a very long time to get there. It is important to note that learning to love occurs through all kinds of life situations that find a place in close and long-term relationships. A true feeling is not at all something that suddenly falls on a person’s head. Although some people believe that this is exactly what happens in life. For adult, true love, a person matures through the renunciation of selfishness and his own prejudices. Perhaps this is the most important thing, without which it is impossible to love.

People choose a wife or husband, but in order to experience a sublime feeling in family life, it is necessary to get to know each other well, then become friends and only then fall in love. Today, many couples confuse the candy-bouquet period with love. However, as soon as romance and brightness leave them, and rose-colored glasses are broken, the first tests in terms of relationships and the first difficulties begin, which not everyone can overcome. Often they believe that this love has passed, which is very funny and absurd.

The first month is honeymoon

Usually the courtship phase is divided into several stages. It is worth noting here that the stage of gifts and bouquets in different couples continues in completely different periods of time.

The first stage can be characterized by the word “caution”. Young people look closely at each other, keep their emotions under control and try to present themselves as favorably as possible.

How long the candy-bouquet period can last and whether it will exist at all depends entirely on this phase. If a gentleman does not consider it necessary to give his girlfriend symbolic gifts and attention, and the young lady is not ready to accept material signs of sympathy, then perhaps their relationship will either fall apart or be devoid of elementary notes of romance.

If partners are willing to spend time and effort, then their feelings move to the next stage.

Periods

The first date does not always turn into a serious relationship. It all depends on the impression that the partners make on each other. At the first meeting, it is not possible to fully “reveal” a person, to find out all the advantages and disadvantages of his character. Many limit themselves to the first date. They put an end to future relationships, leaving an unpleasant impression of themselves.

If a romance between a man and a woman begins to develop, they need to be prepared to go through certain stages of the relationship.

  1. It all starts with the candy-bouquet period. This is the stage of falling in love, which lasts about a year and a half.
  2. Next comes the stage of satiety.
  3. This is followed by a stage of disgust or rejection.
  4. Then comes a period of tolerance (humility).
  5. Next comes the service stage.
  6. The previous period smoothly turns into respect and friendship.
  7. And it all ends with divine love.

All partners go through the above stages. Some couples reach the final stage of the relationship, acquiring harmony and bliss. Others get stuck on certain sections, unable to overcome the difficulties that arise. More often, lovers break up in the third phase of a relationship.

Sweetness of the second phase

On average, the first segment lasts from several weeks to a maximum of a year. Then the lovers live in a state of constant euphoria. The feeling of shame is dulled, but attachment arises. The candy-bouquet period reaches its peak. The partners are absolutely open, but nevertheless remain interesting and new to each other. This stage includes everything that will bring a smile to the face of your loved one.

Methods that can help at this time include surprises. It is worth noting that this period involves not only one-sided influence. Guys are no less sentimental at heart than girls, so they also want attention, gifts and even sweets.

During this stage, the most romantic dates, the most emotional proposals and life-changing decisions occur. In addition to love, friendship arises in a couple, which becomes the key to support and trust. This phase can last on average from one to three years.

Stages of love development

The evolution of love is generally recognized to include 7 stages, each of which has its own characteristics and approximate time frames. However, they do not in any way limit how much time a couple will actually need to go through these stages, because in any relationship everything is individual, there are no absolutely similar couples. Therefore, do not be surprised that your friends go through stages slowly, but for you they flew by quite quickly. It may even happen that the pair returns to its original level - this is called “cyclicality”. You need to understand that every relationship develops in its own way and the speed of their development depends on many factors: on character, on the degree of affection, or in general on life circumstances that you cannot influence. The main subject of the article will be the characteristics of the candy-bouquet period, but we will briefly touch on all subsequent steps in the development of love in a relationship.

Love

This stage occupies the main attention of the article, because it is what is called the candy-bouquet period, the most romantic period in the life of a couple. It is characterized by a strong feeling of falling in love and euphoria from it. They often joke in Russia that this is the only legal drug, its influence is so strong. In the male and female organisms, captured by a strong feeling, real chemistry occurs at this stage of relationship development.


Nick Huizinga, Unsplash

Satiation

This is a natural phase after you are oversaturated with feelings, which become boring over time and cause a calmer effect. It can be compared to taking off “rose-colored” glasses: rational thinking returns, allowing you to take a sober look not only at the strengths, but also at the shortcomings of your partner.

Disgust

It would seem, how can one feel disgust towards someone who previously evoked the most pleasant feelings? But this stage is as inevitable for the further development of relations as all others. It places emphasis on deliberately searching for the partner’s flaws; his flaws are seen as so disgusting that thoughts appear: “How was it even possible to date her?”, “What did I find in her?” ?. In a relationship, nitpicking over little things begins, everything about your loved one begins to irritate, this leads to quarrels, disagreements, and the only way out seems to be the end of the relationship. Don’t rush to cut the ends – the next stage is coming.

Humility

Not all couples will move to this stage of development; many will give up everything and will have to start with the candy-bouquet period with another partner. The stage of humility brings long-awaited peace. A man and a woman begin to understand that they both have both minuses and pluses, and most importantly, that this is normal! They come to terms with this fact.


Mohammad Faruque, Unsplash

Respect

At this stage, selfishness shifts to the background: you want to do it not for yourself, but for her (him). There appears sincere concern for each other, support not for the sake of mutual help, but just like that.

Friendship

This step is very important. After a thorny path, you become much closer, you are not afraid to trust and open up.

Love

And now comes the long-awaited final stage of relationship development - love. Not everyone understands how difficult it is to love: to give in somewhere, but in some matters, on the contrary, to show firmness, sincerely care, be responsible for each other’s feelings, support and be sincere.

It is these 7 steps that all couples go through, whose favorite is the candy-bouquet couple. Let's figure out what's wrong with it.


Aiony Haust, Unsplash

Stress Tour

After the peak comes the difficulties of the candy-bouquet period. As with any phenomenon or activity, passion begins to subside. Life turns into a routine. A man stops performing feats in the name of his lady, since she already belongs to him. The woman, in turn, stops encouraging her partner to continue to conquer her. Bright romantic adventures, bouquets of flowers and expensive chocolate disappear from life. But banal but much needed socks, shaving foam, kitchen sets and shower gels are increasingly appearing as gifts. Unpleasant changes lead to stress.

The further fate of the relationship depends on how the partners react to such climate change in the couple. If the turn is very sharp, then the likelihood that the young people will not separate is small. On the contrary, lovers who smoothly move on to another stage will remain together.

Respect

The stage of service smoothly transitions into the stage of mutual respect and friendship. This is the highest level in human relations. The psychology of the stage of relationships between a man and a woman at this stage characterizes partners as two separate individuals who easily and simply find a common language, solve problems together without conflicts and receive satisfaction from their union. The partners are grateful to each other for their support and understanding. Their relationship sometimes resembles the first phase of falling in love. But only ardent passion and raging emotions are replaced by respect, devotion and mutual understanding.

The partners' relationship smoothly turns into friendship. A man and a woman accept each other with all their shortcomings, showing respect. Such families are set as examples. They are imitated. The couple went through so much together and at the same time remained family, maintaining tenderness of feelings and trust in each other.

The art of gift

There are many secrets on how you can continue the candy-bouquet period. Psychology will tell you where to start a relationship in which there will be a sea of ​​flowers and gifts.

First and foremost, you need to teach your partner to understand the essence of gifts through the prism of bribes and gratitude. That is, an item given at the start of a journey together (on the eve of a trip to a restaurant, a kiss or sex) will be perceived as a bribe. And a gift after a successful date plays the role of a symbol that will indicate that the partner is satisfied with everything and is ready to continue communication and reach a new level. After all, few people will fork out money, realizing that there can be no future.

Candy-bouquet period

During the period of falling in love, the body produces hormones that cause a feeling of unconditional happiness. Not only does the surrounding reality acquire bright colors, but the loved one appears ideal. The lover does not see his partner's shortcomings and exaggerates his merits.

A beautiful voice, a unique shade of eyes, silky hair - the image of a lover consists entirely of charms and miracles. This state is akin to drug intoxication, so during this period you should not decide anything important, because the brain is not able to adequately perceive and analyze information. It is better to wait until the moment of sobering consciousness.

But there is no need to be afraid to plunge headlong into the pool of feelings. This time is touching and carefree, you cannot miss it.

What is it and what is it eaten with?

During this period, the couple is overcome by a feeling of blossoming love without the burden of problems and obligations. The lovers walk, have fun, laugh and kiss constantly. The future seems bright.

Partners experience mutual attraction. A man and a woman are embarrassed when communicating and try to present themselves to each other in the best light.

The image of the partner is drawn more clearly - his worldview, character, manners and habits are revealed. In the eyes of their partners, lovers become bright characters and become more attached every day.

People follow their desires. They go to the cinema or cafe because they really want to spend time together. In long-term relationships, this becomes a tradition or obligation. A meeting with the parents of the chosen one is eagerly awaited, because this is an opportunity to take feelings to a new level and legitimize them. In family life, visiting relatives is an act of politeness.

You don't need any sophistication to please yourself and your partner in bed—each touch feels like a tiny electric shock.

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How long does it last and does it happen to everyone?

The duration of the candy-bouquet period in a relationship is different for each couple. The countdown starts from the moment of the first meeting until the decision to start a family. Romance can last 1 month or more. To understand the degree of initial attachment between people, six months is enough. Some couples do without this period. Breaking up after completing the stage indicates a fear of close relationships.

Main stages

Each period in a relationship has its own characteristics. Stages of the candy-bouquet period:

  1. A bright and emotional start to a relationship. People enthusiastically get to know each other, as if they were reading an exciting novel. They flutter with happiness, give gifts for no reason, anxiously await each new meeting. It doesn’t matter to them where it will take place, because hormones allow them to get the maximum impression from any event. The fact of spending time together, kisses and touches delight lovers.
  2. The next stage comes when the girl begins to take the initiative. The rule that you don’t have to force yourself on a guy doesn’t work here. It doesn't matter who calls or makes the appointment first.
  3. The third stage is characterized by getting to know the partner’s relatives and friends. At the previous stages, people got to know each other and drew conclusions about each other. The time has come to see a clearer picture of a person’s personality through communication with his environment. It is important to be casual but respectful.

The main purpose of this period is to get to know your partner's personality, create attraction and shared romantic memories that will fuel the connection in the future.

Errors allowed

Euphoria at the initial stage of a relationship creates the illusion that nothing can spoil the romantic atmosphere. When people relax, they make many mistakes:

  1. At the first stage, you should not rush into intimacy and be frank with your partner - the intrigue should be maintained.
  2. Girls tend to be obsessive - send a man a lot of messages, call too often. This is caused by vivid pictures of betrayal that appear in the head, the fear of losing a guy. It's normal to show interest in your partner's life and communicate, but it's easy to overstep the mark. If the chosen one does not answer, it means that he is busy or was scared off by strong pressure.
  3. Strong love makes a person neglect his own interests and personal space for the sake of his beloved. The foundation is laid for an unhealthy relationship that will lead to pain and disappointment.

Often, promising couples break up due to ignorance and incorrect behavior of people at the beginning of a relationship. You should always analyze your behavior and understand that every action has its consequences.


Chain system

Another, no less important, rule is that you need to learn to accept surprises, no matter how banal they may be. Phrases like “why do I need this” or “I shouldn’t have bought this” make a partner feel inferior.

The last law of the long candy-bouquet period is the chain theory. You shouldn’t wait for a holiday to do something nice for your loved one. Give things and emotions regardless of the days of the calendar. And, most importantly, start the chain mechanism, that is, respond to any gift with a gift.

Bottom line

The candy-bouquet period is simply a riot of hormones that do not require effort on the part of partners. If a man and a woman like each other, then they give in to feelings. But when true love comes, hormones no longer rage. The candy-bouquet period has passed, only people with their advantages and disadvantages, desires and goals for the future remain.

You can have romantic evenings, spend time together, take an interest in each other, help and support. This is love when people do not cling to each other, but stay together only because they decided so. In this case, each partner becomes independent. A man and a woman are in a relationship, but they can have their own interests, desires, spend time separately, that is, maintain their individuality and independence, while still being in a relationship and experiencing love.

What is the bouquet and candy period?

This is the period when two people interested in each other begin to get acquainted, trying to interest and attract the attention of the other party to their personality. Here, more than ever, it is important to observe the person you have chosen, the body that is new to you and the soul that has not yet been explored. You need to get to know not only her thoughts and character, but also her body. The old sexual practices that you are used to with your previous long-term or, conversely, short-term partner will not work here. You need to take a closer look at the habits and habits of your new passion. After all, everyone has their own preferences in choosing positions, individual erogenous zones and many psychological characteristics.

Listen to how much her breathing quickens, and remember the points with which, when kissing, you make her head spin with frequent and strong inhalations and exhalations. If you watch, you will undoubtedly find what you are looking for, and, having mastered the art of knowing her body, you will ensure that the single room in the shape of her heart will become a container for one single resident, for you. Women love to feel small and fragile, regardless of their weight category and body composition. Even the fattest madam, listed with her weight in the Guinness Book of Records, in the depths of her soul dreams of a handsome and powerful prince who will take the side of her protection and care.

To show a woman your physical advantages and superiorities that distinguish the stronger sex from the weaker, it is not necessary to pump your body up to its neck with steroids and anabolic steroids, exhausting yourself and your physical body with the help of multi-ton and multi-variant training equipment. You may not imagine yourself as a world or at least European champion in the heavy weight category in Greco-Roman wrestling. Not at all. You just need to clearly identify male situations and moments in which you could establish yourself as not only a wonderful and experienced lover, but also as a caring and courteous partner.

If you see that your lady is lifting a multi-kilogram musical installation, then rip this activity out of her hands with your teeth, explaining that you should do this, not her. Point out to her that you will no longer allow her to lift any kind of heavy loads, that she now has you precisely in order to protect her fragile body and delicate hands from heavy physical exertion. Show her that you are one of those who devote a special place to physical assistance and moral support for your chosen one.

Believe me, if you show her that for you she is fragile not only physically, then you will get yourself sex - a lioness, which, by the way, is becoming an endangered species in our time. Try to demonstrate your physical superiority as often as possible, for example, by casually picking up your woman in your arms or sitting her on your lap yourself. She will appreciate it with a one hundred percent guarantee: despite the fact that this inexplicable sex is trying to prove to the entire modern strong half of humanity that they are incredibly strong, yet deep down in their souls they are looking for a man - a giant who will carry any problem across a bridge in his arms will sort it out. You need to show her that you are exactly the kind of chosen one who is able, in a moment of sadness, to pick up your little girl in your arms and, stroking her head, rock her to a state of peace on your mighty heroic chest.

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