Verbal and nonverbal communication: what they are and their meaning.

Nonverbal is “body language” in a broad sense: the transmission of information through gestures, smells, taste, voice, visual signals. Nonverbal means of communication contribute to the creation of psychological contact between partners, enrich the meanings conveyed by words, and reflect the interpretation of the situation. Factors influencing the non-verbal side of communication are national characteristics, health status, professional etiquette, social status, and membership in certain age groups.

Means of nonverbal communication

The main means of such communication is the body, which is capable of transmitting information through facial expressions, gestures, pantomime, changing position in space and the mise-en-scène of communication.

Due to the diversity and richness of facial capabilities, our body is capable of transmitting a huge number of images, becoming a powerful tool for conveying the necessary information to people around us.

It’s very easy to check this: just try to watch a movie in a foreign language that you don’t speak, and you will be surprised to note that you understand, if not the very essence of the characters’ conversations, then the message, the emotions that they put into the conversation, and even main idea and plot.

This is due to the fact that, in conditions of semantic deficit arising from ignorance of the language, we subconsciously monitor facial expressions, micro-gestures more closely than usual, and read the plot and emotional components from the movements and tone of voice of the characters.

Eye contact

This method of body language allows you to demonstrate interest in the conversation and better understand the meaning of what is being said. During the conversation, both people create and then adjust their comfort level. To do this, they periodically meet each other's gaze. Then they take them aside. Staring can both build trust and create feelings of discomfort.

Eye contact maintains common themes that are pleasant to the interlocutors. Confused and negative questions lead to a person looking away, thereby demonstrating his hostility and disagreement. Those features that are characteristic of a particular eye contact allow us to draw reliable conclusions about the level of interest in the conversation and attitude towards the speaker. So, with:

indignant, the gaze becomes intent, intrusive and a little alarming
in admiration, eye contact is prolonged and the gaze is calm;
the position towards the interlocutor is attentive, and eye contact is interrupted every 10 seconds;
in anticipation, the eyebrows are raised and the gaze is sharp;
hostility, a person rolls his eyes and avoids eye contact.

Language

Saying that we speak one language, for example, Russian, we little think about the fact that we actually know two languages: not only language as a means of verbal communication, but also body language - a universal complex of postures and movements with the help of which Representatives of different nationalities, cultures and races can communicate.

Unlike dictionary language, to master which you need to study the alphabet, phonetics, grammar and other components, sign language is unique: using obvious mental images and concepts, we can establish communication with both Amazonian Indians and Eskimos.

Of course, this communication will be simple, at the level of basic concepts, but without the use of means of non-verbal communication, through the use of words alone, we will not achieve anything at all - our language will be incomprehensible to our interlocutors, while pointing a finger at a subject of interest is universal and will help establish initial contact .

How to tell if a person is lying

Nonverbal signals of lying are not so difficult to recognize if you know a few secrets. Our subconscious does not tell lies and will easily reveal a liar. Be attentive to the signals, they can reveal a person’s real thoughts:

gestures:
sight;
pose;
intonation, voice timbre.

Do you want to find out what your teenage son or daughter is hiding? Or maybe you want to understand how your boss really treats you? Are you wondering if your husband is cheating on you? You can find out the answers to these questions by studying the psychology of lying.

Take a closer look at the left side. This part of the face can easily give away a liar. Take a close look at the person whose sincerity you doubt. If during the story his left hand dangles, describes vague circles, or he wrings his fingers on it, this is a sign that the interlocutor is lying. The left leg can do the same. The thing is that the left and right hemispheres of the brain control both the left and right sides of the body, but it works crosswise. This means that the right hemisphere, which is responsible for emotions and is difficult to control, will most likely tell a lie, even if rehearsed in advance.
Mouth covered with hand. If your counterpart wants to lie, he can cover his mouth with his hand. The thumb is usually pressed against the cheek. In addition, the interlocutor may cough. The main thing is not to confuse this nonverbal sign with a real cold. If such a signal is given by a person who is listening, then this means distrust of the interlocutor.

"Noodles on the ears." A person who is tired of his own lies will cover his ears with his hands or hold them near this part of the body. This gesture is an attempt to distance oneself from an untrue story. A person who does not believe the words of his interlocutor will do the same.
Squeeze through teeth. There is a proverb: “A word is not a sparrow; if it flies out, you cannot catch it.” The person who is deceiving will try not to open the “birdhouse” too much, that is, to speak not very loudly and as if through clenched teeth. Such behavior may also indicate dissatisfaction, irritation, fatigue or sadness of the person telling the story. It all depends on the context and situation.
Eyes are a reflection of the truthfulness of words. The stronger sex does not like to look you in the eye if you are deceiving. A man scratches his eyelid. The lady may start adjusting her makeup or pretend that something has gotten into her eye. This non-verbal signal also indicates that you are tired of your counterpart.
Avert your eyes. Representatives of the stronger sex control their emotions well, but if the deception is serious, they shift their gaze to the floor. Girls, as a rule, look at the ceiling when they lie.
My neck itches. This is one of the most interesting gestures noticed by psychologists. A person who is lying begins to scratch his neck with the index finger of his right hand. In this case, he usually makes five movements. If the interlocutor who is listening does this, it means that he does not believe his opponent.
Keep it short. Even if a person has been preparing and thinking through a lie for a long time, he will try to give it out as quickly as possible and without unnecessary details. The liar himself is unpleasant about the story he is telling, so he will try to end it as quickly as possible.
An inquisitive look. If in ordinary conversation people do not have the habit of catching a reaction to their words, then the liar will look inquisitively into the eyes, checking whether they believe him or not.

Nonverbal signals as the only means of communication

The importance of non-verbal communication cannot be overestimated - it remains the only means of exchanging information in cases where:

people do not know each other's language even at a basic level;
people do not have the physical ability to make sounds.

If in the first case it is subsequently possible to establish a higher level of communication through the gradual study of each other’s languages, then in the second, various types of non-verbal communication come to the fore and become the only possible means of contact.

For people with speech disabilities and hearing loss, sign language is the only language they can use, and their fingers become their vocal cords and their gestures become their words.

In situations where people who are physically capable of producing sounds find themselves in an environment that does not allow them to pronounce these sounds, it is the tools of nonverbal communication that come to the fore. These signals are used in scuba diving (dive signals), in noisy rooms (rolling shops, engine rooms), while hunting, and when participating in hostilities (ambushes).

How does communication differ from the concept of communication?

Communication covers all aspects of human contacts. These include contacts with nature, with neighbors, and at work. Communication is subject to certain requirements and rules. This concept presupposes specific goals for communication that at least one of the parties to the communication process has. Verbal communication (speech is its main means) is subject to strict rules, depending on its type. The communicator (a person who takes an active part in the communication process) has specific tasks that are designed to influence the other participant in the conversation. This process is more appropriate in business communication. That is why there is the concept of “verbal business communication,” which is applicable only in official communication and involves verbal exchange of information.

The history of the emergence of nonverbal means of communication

Nonverbal behavior as a set of gestural and figurative expressions through the body arose at the dawn of humanity, when language as a means of communication had not yet been invented, and communication between individual representatives of the tribe was carried out precisely through nonverbal behavior.

It was possible to convey information through primitive gestures, and non-verbal means of communication coped with the task that ancient people needed to solve perfectly. They pointed to prey and fellow tribesmen with their hands, depicted simple phenomena - rain, thunderstorms, mimicked anger, threatened, grinning and baring their teeth.

An excellent example of primitive nonverbal behavior is the communication of dogs. Dogs almost never bark when meeting - they communicate by changing their gait, posture, level of tail movement, grinning or lowering their ears, and the information they receive is enough for them to correctly assess the situation and the status of their interlocutor.

Conscious and unconscious use of body signals

Nonverbal means of communication can be divided into two types based on the consciousness of use:

nonverbal communication that we use consciously is those facial and gestural means that we use deliberately, that is, the tools we use to clearly convey specific information to the addressee;
involuntary nonverbal behavior is those postures, gestures and changes in body position, as well as microgestures that we use unconsciously, uncontrollably. A specialist who knows how to read the signs of involuntary nonverbal behavior can tell more than the words we say.

Consciously used such means of communication provide a large layer of gestural, plastic and facial capabilities. Actors most clearly demonstrate this type of non-verbal communication tools: when playing a role, they use gestures and facial expressions to bring the image to perfection and give credibility to the game. The tools of good actors are very rich; they are able to remember and apply hundreds of different small poses, glances, turns of the head, which add variability to the words they use for the role.

Virginia Satyr Categories

Virginia Satir was one of the world's leading psychologists and family therapists. And the basics of its work were used at the very beginning of the development of NLP. During her career, she wrote many works in these areas and also gave lectures. During her practice, she noticed that all people, as a rule, fall into one of five categories of linguistic behavior. These types are: blaming, ingratiating, calculating, detached and balanced. They all reflect basic communication styles and provide a significant amount of data about how a person prefers to interact with others. Let's look at these categories in more detail.

Accuser. People belonging to this category tend to look for people who can be blamed for the fact that everything is not happening as it should. They project their experiences onto others, call them different names, point fingers at them, and use stern gestures. Their main motivation is to show others their “place” and to reprimand. Blaming people are usually very lonely.

Ingratiating. The peculiarity of ingratiating people is that they mirror those who accuse, also wanting to shift the blame onto someone else. But they do it a little differently: despite the fact that they shift responsibility to others, they make an effort to ensure that they themselves are perceived as very pleasant and positive people. Moreover, they may even take the blame for something in order to whitewash themselves. Ingratiating people often point out cause-and-effect relationships, use a lot of nonspecific verbs (that don't say anything specific about how something was done) and modal operators (can, can't, must, must, etc.), but don't use sharp gestures.

Calculating. People of this type prefer to hide their emotions so as not to reveal their true reactions or intentions. They are rational, unemotional, and have self-control. Those around them often perceive them as indifferent, aloof, cold, and insensitive. They relieve themselves of responsibility by moving the conversation into a more general direction and using “you” messages, i.e. phrases that make others feel guilty. Due to their personality traits, such people often live alone.

Detached. Such people can play the role of blaming, ingratiating, and calculating. It is precisely because of their ability to switch from one type to another that they are called detached. In life situations, they try to act as the situation dictates to them. In speech they often use generalizations, do not talk about anything specifically, but rather mean something by their words.

Balanced. People belonging to this type can be described as maximally adequate and based only on facts. They express everything exactly as they consider necessary and correct, often telling the truth to their face, thereby causing negative emotions in others. This is perhaps the only negative in the general characteristics of balanced people.

You can recognize any of the five types presented by being careful in observing people's body language. For example, blaming people generally show signs of being visual, ingratiating people are kinesthetic, and calculating people are digital. The detached ones, in turn, reflect all types of representative systems and can represent one or the other. Simply put, you will be able to determine a person's Satyr category after spending some time with them. The fact is that most often all the mental characteristics of a person manifest themselves unconsciously and it is quite problematic to veil them, so you need to be extremely attentive to any of their manifestations, and especially physical ones. But there’s no need to rush into defining a category either. With experience, a new skill will be honed and there will be more opportunities to use it. And remember that when communicating with other people, you should also pay attention to yourself, because... you behave yourself based on your predisposition to one of the categories.

Speaking about the categories according to Satir, we should certainly talk about how to adapt to these categories, because This process has a number of important features.

Adjustment to categories by Satyr

Adjusting to categories according to Satir in NLP differs from simple adjustment to predicate words, when you try to tune in to the representative system of another person, because... adjustment to categories, on the contrary, can interrupt the established connection with another person and strengthen the behavior demonstrated by him. Based on the words of Virginia Satir herself, when adjusting to people of different categories, you should always, except in cases with people of a balanced category, disconnect from them. So, for example, talking with an accusing person from the position of the same accusing person can only lead to a tense argument. Ingratiating yourself with someone who is ingratiating you is not practical, because... this will lead to mutual complaining about life. To be distant when communicating with someone who is distant means to introduce confusion and misunderstanding into communication. Following the manner of a calculating person during contact with a calculating one will lead to nothing but an exchange of dry phrases and cliched expressions. It follows that effective affiliation is possible only with people of a balanced category.

So what is the best way to adjust to the categories according to Satir?

It is best to start adjusting from the position of a prudent person, because... in communication he is vague and does not take unnecessary risks. This tactic allows you to more accurately and slowly determine the position of the other person.
Try to avoid acting from the perspective of a distant person, otherwise others may have the wrong impression of you as a person who may have some problems with himself.
Keep in mind that there is always a discrepancy between what a person actually feels and what he says, as well as how this is expressed on a physiological level.
Don’t make hasty conclusions, but watch people more, listen to them and compare what you were able to note with what you know about each of the categories.
Having roughly established the category to which a person belongs, methodically begin to use methods of communication and influence appropriate for this category. If something is not confirmed, then perhaps you should try to apply techniques that are effective for another category, because the assessment (especially at the very beginning of practice) may be given incorrectly.

And a few more words about categories

Almost all people are accustomed to functioning in a certain mode, i.e. feel comfortable performing all actions from the position of the most preferred category. But there is one caveat: none of the categories is effective on its own and in stressful situations can serve as a bad way to overcome them rather than a good one, because it limits the potential capabilities of any person. And in unusual or stressful situations, it is advisable to be flexible and use the maximum number of means of communication and ways of interacting with people and circumstances.

Remember that the communication professional, while aware of the existence of categories, is not a follower or example of any of them, but uses them all!

Now we should talk about one of the main concepts in NLP and psychology in general, without which not a single fact of people’s interaction with each other and the world around them can exist - the next section of the article is devoted to rapport and its establishment.

Microexpressions and involuntary nonverbal cues

Involuntary nonverbal behavior is those contractions of the muscles of the body and face that a person is unable to control.

Consciously telling a lie, trying to hide feelings, a person is nevertheless unable to control the so-called micro-expressions flashing on the face. These are tools of non-verbal behavior that help a specialist psychologist or simply a very observant interlocutor to recognize deception, an attempt to hide information or emotions, since it is impossible to consciously keep muscles from contracting such muscles.

Representatives of certain professions, for which the ability to recognize deception is very important, are taught this ability, or they look for people who are initially predisposed to reading microexpressions. Thus, the ability to detect a lie is extremely important for customs officials, security services, and investigators.

To correctly recognize facial microexpressions, it is important to remember that facial expressions do not express the subject’s thoughts, but feelings, and if disgust flashes on the face for a moment, this does not mean that it is caused by the subject of the conversation - perhaps the person simply has an unpleasant association.

Facial expressions

Our facial expression is the main element that reflects a person’s feelings and emotions. This is facial expressions.

We recognize any positive emotions much more easily than negative ones. Love and surprise are not as hidden by a person as anger or disgust. Researchers have proven that emotions are reflected differently on the left and right sides of the face. This is explained by the different functions assigned to the hemispheres of the brain. So, the right is responsible for the emotional sphere, and the left is responsible for intellectual functions.

In facial expressions, emotions are expressed as follows:

a state of anger is accompanied by wide open eyes, clenched teeth, and downturned corners of the lips;
surprise can be judged by the slightly open mouth, raised eyebrows and wide open eyes;
when fearful, a person brings his eyebrows together and stretches his lips, lowering and pulling down their corners;
happiness corresponds to a calm gaze, as well as drawn back, raised corners of the lips;
a sad person can be recognized by his dull gaze, knitted eyebrows and downturned corners of his lips.

Consciously reading nonverbal cues

Like the use of nonverbal behavior, the ability to correctly read and recognize nonverbal signals given by an interlocutor can be conscious and unconscious.

Conscious reading of nonverbal behavior allows us, by observing the interlocutor, to understand by his facial expression, posture, gait, and even the turn of his shoulders, what feelings he is experiencing and what shade his speech has.

For example, the phrase: “I hate you!” written on paper cannot be read unambiguously without a description of the facial expressions of the speaker. In life, the nonverbal behavior of the speaker will say a lot about the subtext:

if it is pronounced expressively, with frowning eyebrows, pursed lips and lowered corners, with tense fists, the interlocutor will understand the message - he is really hated, since the whole posture and face of the speaker expresses anger;
pronounced in a cheerful tone, supported by a smile and a casual wave of the hand with a relaxed body, the same phrase becomes a playful, friendly joke.

It is at such moments that non-verbal means of communication are indispensable; it is not for nothing that authors of fiction often use the epithets “muttered”, “shouted out”, “hissed” instead of the dry “said”, giving faceless words an obvious emotional connotation.

How to recognize the sincerity of a smile

Any person considers a smile a sign of sympathy and good attitude. It influences the subconscious in any case, whether you want it or not. Therefore, it is so important to distinguish between a real manifestation of sympathy or a fake, forced smile, with the help of which they want to achieve something from you.

Asymmetry is a bad sign. A real smile is even, but when a person “pulls” it, one corner of the mouth may be higher than the other. Showing teeth is also considered a sign of trust and affection. A sign of goodwill is that the interlocutor is not embarrassed to laugh in front of you.

Irony. Ironic laughter is characteristic of people who generally treat you well, but it means that at the moment you look comical. The smile is slightly distorted, and one eye may be squinted.

Sarcasm is a blatant display of disrespect and arrogance. The person considers you beneath him and openly laughs at you. Signs of sarcasm:

crooked smile;
arrogant squinting of the eyes;
hostility in the voice.

How to understand nonverbal signals of boredom? This is especially necessary if a person’s profession involves constant public speaking. It is also important for sales agents to understand whether a potential buyer is listening to his speech or is just pretending. If your opponent is bored, he is unlikely to be able to hide it: body language does not deceive.

Unconscious reading of nonverbal cues

Just as the body gives away our lies by broadcasting involuntary nonverbal signals in the form of momentary microexpressions and gestures, our subconscious mind is able to read these types of nonverbal communication.

For example, you are communicating with an interlocutor who seems to be saying something pleasant, positive, making promises and convincing of his loyalty, but something inside you is itching: “He is lying, fawning, trying to hide information, he cannot be trusted!” . Some call it intuition, others call it a premonition, but from the point of view of the science of nonverbal communication, this is nothing more than the unconscious reading of the microexpressions of the interlocutor, comparing them with words and subconsciously assessing the correspondence. When a discrepancy is found between verbal and nonverbal signals, the brain tries to tell you in every available way: the person is hiding something, the gestures do not correspond to the words, you need to be on your guard!

Unconscious nonverbal behavior cannot be controlled, and specialists who can read such microexpressions learn to turn unconscious recognition of nonverbal communication gestures into conscious awareness through extensive training.

Recognize deception

Is it possible to feel comfortable and confident when communicating with different people? Yes, but this requires knowledge of non-verbal communication. This will allow you to avoid situations where the interlocutor is trying to deceive.

The correspondence between the verbal and nonverbal signals given is called congruence. In this case, we can say that the interlocutor is telling the truth. They will tell you about the falsity of the information provided:

too frequent or long pauses, as well as hesitation before each remark;
lack of synchronicity in the work of facial muscles, asymmetry of facial expressions;
a frozen expression on the face that remains unchanged for 5-10 seconds;
the occurrence of pauses between the word and the emotions related to it;
a forced smile;
shallow eye contact, with a restless facial expression;
twitching of any part of the body, biting lips, tapping on the table with fingers;
few gestures under the control of the liar;
heavy breathing and high pitched voice;
crossed legs and bent body;
blinking eyes at a high frequency.

Basic characteristics of nonverbal signals

Various parts of the body are used as tools to use and read such signals, but posture, gait, and plasticity are also important.

The nonverbal behavior of an open, self-confident subject is characterized by the following features:

straight back, shoulders turned, good posture, free gait;
raised head, confident look directly at the interlocutor;
“open” gestures - relaxed arms, not closed on the chest or in a “lock”, legs not crossed;
absence of fussy small gestures, attempts to cover your mouth or nose with your palm.

Nonverbal means of communication that demonstrate that a person is trying to hide something:

drooping chin, tense shoulders, slight hunching;
a gaze constantly moving from the interlocutor’s face to the floor or running over objects behind his back;
“closed” gestures - arms crossed on the chest, a “leg to leg” pose, involuntary touching of the nose and lips with fingers, hands “housed” at chin level.

Such signs of nonverbal communication allow you to assess the degree of frankness of the interlocutor, help you take a sober approach to what he says, and decide whether to trust the person.

Interpersonal space

The distance at which the interlocutors are from each other plays an important role in establishing contact. Often people express their feelings using categories such as “I want to be closer” or “stay away from him.” People interested in each other reduce the space separating them. It could be:

intimate - up to 0.5 m, expressing a trusting relationship between friends and loved ones;
interpersonal (from 0.5 to 1.2 m), which is comfortable during a friendly conversation;
social (from 1.2 to 3.7 m), characteristic of informal interaction during a business meeting;
public - over 3.7 m - this is the distance for a person speaking in front of a group of people.

The significance and scope of such distances are directly dependent on a person’s gender and age, as well as on personal characteristics. Thus, children are always more comfortable being closer to their interlocutor, while teenagers more often close themselves off and try to distance themselves from those with whom they are conducting a dialogue. Women prefer closer distances, but self-confident and balanced people do not care about it.

Business conversation

Nonverbal means of communication in negotiations and at work are of great importance: despite the formal unspoken ban on an overly expressed emotional component in business communication, a successful salesperson is able to either fail a product presentation or save it with the help of properly constructed nonverbal communication with listeners.

If a specialist presenting a product or technology presents it, monotonously reciting the text, without using a change in intonation, without supplementing the words with gestures, facial expressions, if he slouches and nervously rubs his hands, the listeners unconsciously read all these signs of uncertainty and are imbued with distrust of the product through distrust of the person presenting it to a person.

If the presentation is accompanied by competently delivered speech, rich in intonation, supported by open gestures, a smile, good posture and an open look, unconscious non-verbal communication signals: your interlocutor is worthy of trust, which means the product is too.

The essence of verbal communication - what it is and why it is needed

Verbal communication refers to oral as well as written speech. It is with their help that we can express our opinions, thoughts, openly argue with a companion, give arguments, share impressions with friends, talk about what we saw, heard, read, etc.

When one speaks, the other listens very carefully and responds. This could be agreement, outrage, argument, or simply absorbing new interesting information. The lack of verbal communication makes every person lonely, withdrawn and isolated from the outside world. It is thanks to disputes, explanations and presentation of their thoughts that people come to a compromise and find a way out of difficult situations.

Correctly delivered speech is an important factor in verbal communication, which benefits everyone. How quickly a person can navigate a conversation, answer questions, establish new connections and express thoughts will directly determine his place in this world. When applying for a job, management pays special attention to these factors.

In addition to simple words and sentences, the emotional message plays a particularly important role. By intonation, tone, and speed of explanation, you can understand the mood of the interlocutor. Screaming, dissatisfaction, and criticism most often cause a response in the form of aggression and ignoring the interlocutor. When the boss (friend, parents) chooses the right words and speaks calmly, it is easier for the employee to process the information received, find the mistake made and correct it.

Nonverbal cues in face-to-face communication

Nonverbal communication in personal relationships is the basis of communication. Words alone, without emotional reinforcement, without touches and small, but unconsciously read signals, will not get you far in family life.

Spouses may communicate little, exhausted by everyday life, children and work, but if in a dream they move closer to each other, if in rare hours of being together in the house, even when each is busy with his own business, they find a second to touch each other, smile - such the family is strong.

On the contrary, couples who publicly hug, kiss and otherwise express positive emotions at the level of conscious non-verbal signals, but do not experience warm feelings for each other, betray themselves by the absence of small gestures - momentary touches, glances, light smiles, and others often unconsciously read this information and before the spouses themselves begin to guess that something is wrong in the family.

To maintain relationships, it is very important to remember about non-verbal means of communication, not to underestimate the importance of touch and expressing emotions not only through words.

Two main types of communication

The process of exchanging information and influencing all participants in communication is divided into two large groups. All functions of communication must be carried out in these groups, otherwise it will not be productive.

Verbal communication involves the verbal transfer of information. In this process, someone speaks and someone listens.

Nonverbal communication occurs through the implementation of an optikokinetic system of signs. Gestures, facial expressions, pantomime are appropriate here, special attention is paid to tone and intonation, and eye contact occurs. This method of communication outwardly expresses the inner world of a person, his personal development.

How to learn to correctly recognize nonverbal signals

By learning to correctly interpret other people's nonverbal signals, you can expand your capabilities, raise nonverbal communication with your interlocutors to a new level, and also learn to recognize attempts to manipulate you.

In order to improve non-verbal communication skills, try to absorb when communicating, notice not only some noticeable, “large” gestures, but also note small ones, perceive the entire palette of human motor skills: facial expression, posture, posture, finger movements and gaze, shift intonation. This will allow over time to cut off superficial, conscious gestures of the interlocutor, identifying micro-expressions and noting signs of deception or unconscious lies. By noticing the broad gesture of your hands, you will also learn to notice the rapid licking of lips that betrays excitement, and then non-verbal communication with people will turn into an exciting ride in which attempts to manipulate you will be broken by your ability to recognize them and avoid them.

Voice timbre and intonation

Correctly reading these non-verbal signals will help you learn to understand a person’s “messages” by reading between the lines. The list of such features includes unfinished sentences and frequent pauses, pitch of voice, speed of speech and construction of phrases. So, we can talk about anxiety if a person’s tone of voice decreases. His speech becomes frequent and abrupt. Confirmation of enthusiasm is a high tone of voice. Speech in this case is confident and clear. When tired, the tone of voice is low. Towards the end of each sentence the person lowers his intonation. Uncertainty is indicated by frequent pauses, mistakes in words, and a nervous cough.

Nonverbal communication and errors

Non-verbal communication is an important component of human communication, and the ability to understand signals helps a lot in life, but we should not forget that excessive enthusiasm for the theory of micro-expressions and unconscious gestures can fail if we do not remember the possibility of mistakes. You should always remember the conditions in which the dialogue is being conducted: in a stuffy room with dry air, for example, licking your lips can symbolize not so much an attempt to deceive as to moisturize dry skin, and folded hands on your chest are sometimes intended not to close yourself off from your interlocutor, but to cover up a poorly placed stain on clothes.

Nonverbal communication is a huge layer of information that you need to be able to use in order to improve your communication skills and learn to avoid outside manipulation.

Postures and gestures

A person's attitudes and feelings can be determined by the way he stands or sits. Individual movements, as well as a set of gestures, will help to recognize them. It is much more pleasant and easier for people to communicate with those who are characterized by expressive motor skills and an animated, but at the same time relaxed facial expression.

Bright gestures indicate positive emotions. They encourage trust and sincerity. Moreover, if a person gestures excessively and often repeats his movements, then we can say that he is internally tense and, moreover, unsure of himself.

The ability to understand the gestures and postures of the interlocutor makes non-verbal communication more accessible and increases the level of mutual understanding. So, a person’s closed eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose and rubbing his chin will indicate concentration. Positively minded people tilt their heads slightly forward, touching their neck with their hand. Distrust is expressed by covering the mouth with a hand. If the interlocutor is clearly bored, then his body is slightly bent and relaxed, and his head is supported by his hand. When disapproving, a person’s movements are restless. He constantly straightens his clothes, shaking off “lint” from them.