Hearing your child’s first laugh is a very significant and long-awaited moment for all parents. This manifestation of emotions means that the baby is already consciously reacting to the words and facial expressions of mom and dad, and has also begun to perceive all the objects around him. In addition, with the help of a smile, various sounds and laughter, the baby makes the first attempts to communicate with parents and other relatives. All mothers look forward to the moment when the child begins to laugh out loud, they want to know at what specific age this can happen.
Baby laughs
Baby's laughter - development of feelings and emotions
A newborn baby expresses its first emotions through screaming and poorly coordinated movements of the limbs. From the fourth to fifth week of life, the baby begins to show some semblance of a smile. There is also a complex reaction to all the actions that mom or dad performs. The baby freezes, focusing on the face of the person who is bending over him, he can throw up his arms, move his legs, walk, squeak, grunt.
From the eighth week after birth, the newborn’s need to communicate with mom and dad increases. During the first half of the year, the baby learns different ways of expressing emotions. Watching the baby, on his face you can see both a weak and a pronounced smile with a sharp animation of facial expressions. The child also tries to express his emotions using gestures.
Smile of a small child
If the hysteria begins...
It is not always possible to prevent tears and demonstrative rolling on the carpet. It is useless to appeal to logic or try to come to an agreement when a child is hysterical. What should parents do? Swear? Threaten? Comfort? Stand nearby and watch? Go to another room?
Let's get acquainted with the advice of psychologists. A child’s hysteria will go away faster if you follow the following rules:
- Keep calm. The best way out is zero reaction. The baby will understand that adults do not respond to his cry, and will stop using this ineffective remedy. Aggression or pity, on the contrary, will only aggravate the problem. To cope with your own emotions, try to pay attention to your breathing and bodily sensations. Imagine that you have grown in size, and the screaming child has become tiny, the size of a pinhead.
- Don't change your mind. If something is prohibited, insist on your own. Children need clear boundaries; permissiveness leads to dangerous consequences.
- React to every tantrum the same way. It’s good if all family members adhere to this rule. Otherwise, remove particularly nervous adults from the room or send them for a walk. The more spectators, the longer the hysteria lasts.
- If your offspring rolls around on the floor, throws objects, or scratches, do not let it get to the point of injury. Apply the hold technique. It consists in the fact that the mother takes the child in her arms facing her and hugs her tightly, even if he breaks away. You need to hold the baby until he looks into your eyes. Do everything silently, without unnecessary emotions.
- If there is no danger of injury, just stay nearby without interfering or talking. You can pretend that you are studying the contents of a cell phone. Most psychologists do not recommend leaving a child alone in this state. After all, he is now experiencing serious suffering. When the adults leave, it seems to the baby that his mom and dad are mortally tired of him, so they left him to the mercy of fate.
- As soon as it subsides, you need to take pity on the baby, take him in your arms, caress him, but in no case promise gifts or privileges. Often children feel weak after a strong tantrum, give them the opportunity to eat or sleep.
- Don't scold your baby. It is useless to find out from him the reasons for this behavior; he himself is not fully aware of them. Explain that a “bad girl” came to him, so he screamed and threw things. Reading special fairy tales and acting out situations using toys as an example will help you understand the emotions you have experienced. Teach your child to control his feelings: let him stick his tongue out at you or raise his hand the next time he feels a “bad girl” approaching. Practice together.
Psychologists are sure that children do not control themselves during a hysterical attack. A different point of view is shared by the famous pediatrician E. Komarovsky. In his opinion, tantrums in a child are caused arbitrarily and are always directed at a selected viewer. If the mother is not sensitive to the baby’s cries, he will behave perfectly with her. But a nervous dad will witness endless whims.
You can cope with the problem only by showing your complete indifference to tears and stamping your feet. Each family member will have to do this. If someone (most often a grandmother) gives up, it is him who the child will use for further manipulation.
It is better to wean the baby from hysterics at the age of 1-2 years. The doctor recommends leaving a screaming baby in the playpen. At the same time, adults leave the room and return only after the crying stops. If their appearance causes a new flood of tears, you need to leave again. Two days is enough to develop a stable reflex: “Mom is nearby if I don’t scream.”
It’s more difficult with older children, because they are already accustomed to achieving what they want in this way. How to calm a child when he is hysterical? Evgeny Komarovsky gives the following recommendations:
- Teach your child to express his feelings using words.
- You shouldn't worry about it, it's better to send him to kindergarten. Teachers are usually less impressionable than parents.
- Avoid “dangerous” situations in which the baby begins to throw tantrums (fatigue, hunger, excessive haste).
- As soon as the whining starts, the baby should be distracted.
- If your baby holds his breath while crying, don't be alarmed. Blow into his face and he will reflexively inhale the air.
- Don't let your child emerge victorious. - this is almost always the result of improper upbringing. Over time, little manipulators grow into completely uncontrollable teenagers who do not take into account the opinions of the people around them.
What can make a baby laugh?
When does a child begin to recognize mom and dad?
Laughter is one of the ways a baby communicates with its parents; it can be caused by a mother’s affectionate words or a smile addressed to the child. When the little one begins to laugh, he expresses his emotions and makes them understandable to all the people around him.
Features of the nervous system
All newborn babies can already smile, but they do it unconsciously, due to spontaneous contraction of the facial nerves. Among scientists, such a smile is called involuntary or endogenous. It appears as a reaction to the satisfaction of all vital needs and indicates the correct development and formation of the nervous system.
Repeating mom or dad's emotions
Babies very often look closely at the face of mom or dad. They get great pleasure from trying to imitate the sounds and mouth movements of adults. At two months, the baby is already able to copy the smile of his parents and thus begins to express his pleasure.
Newborn smiles in his sleep
How to stop a hysteria in the making?
Despite all your efforts, sooner or later you will encounter inappropriate behavior from your baby. The main thing in such a situation is not to be taken by surprise. How to respond to a child’s tantrums so that they do not become the norm? At the initial stages, you can try to distract the child and switch his attention to another activity. The main thing is to remain calm.
Show toughness. If you have banned something, do not change your mind. But offer an alternative. Under no circumstances should you draw on the wall, but you can attach a piece of whatman paper to it and create your masterpieces on it. If you are rushing to the clinic, and the child refuses to go out without the bike, say that the bike is sick. He needs to sleep. But a bear or a bunny will be happy to come with you to the clinic. Who will he choose?
To attract the baby's attention, squat down and try to catch his eye. Voice his emotions: “Right now you’re angry because you want to sleep. Let's stomp with you to stop being angry. Can you stomp even louder?” Be kind, hug your child, and offer to take out aggression by kicking a ball or throwing a stuffed toy. Take your one-year-old baby in your arms, turn on a calm melody, turn off the lights, and talk to him in a sing-song voice. You can watch passers-by through the window and find a hidden bird.
As soon as the child makes contact and calms down a little, give any instructions (find a toy to bathe with, bring mom a phone). You can immediately call someone close to you and praise your child for coping with his emotions.
When real laughter appears
The only means of communication between a newborn and his parents is crying. With its help, the baby can show his needs and satisfy all his needs until a certain time. The further development of pleasant emotional sensations, such as smiling and laughter, is facilitated by a peaceful environment in the family, a feeling of comfort and complete safety.
At 8-12 weeks, babies coo
When does a baby start crawling?
At the end of the second month of life, the child begins to simply smile in response to his mother’s smile or affectionate word. This moment occurs individually for all children, but most often after the sixth week of birth. Since children are all different, in certain cases they may begin to consciously smile earlier or later. A lot depends on the situation in the family, on how emotional the parents are, and how they communicate with each other.
Children try to copy everything after mom and dad; if they see frequent manifestations of affection and tenderness, then the period of conscious smiling will begin by the end of the first month of life. Also, at the same time, babies try to actively move their arms and legs. Over time, they begin to coo in response if one of their relatives addresses them. Pediatricians call this period a revitalization complex and say that this stage of emotional development in a baby’s life is formed starting from the 20th day after birth.
Additional Information. The above data for the appearance of the first laugh are considered to be approximate only. Alternatively, the period can vary from 5 weeks to 3 months. If the baby is already 3.5 months old, but he is not smiling yet, he may have insufficient tactile and vocal contact with mom or dad.
The baby lies on his tummy
Laughter appears at 3-4 months
A joyful smile is a harbinger of laughter in an infant. The baby makes his first attempt to laugh after two months, but it often resembles cackling, so it goes unnoticed by parents. At 3-3.5 months the baby begins to behave completely differently. That moment, long-awaited by all mothers, comes when the child is already laughing out loud. All babies develop on their own schedule and are completely different emotionally. Normally, this moment can occur between 20 and 30 weeks of life.
Laughing out loud occurs in response to tickling, while stroking the tummy or throwing it in the air, and also when the baby hears unusual sounds uttered by mom or dad.
Note! If the baby is 3-4 months old, but he is not smiling yet, it is very important to find out the cause of this problem. Perhaps there is a dysfunctional atmosphere in the family, and the baby is in a state of constant stress and frightened by everything that is happening around.
Dad tickles baby
Parents' mistakes
Psychologists agree that constant tantrums in a child are associated with the wrong reaction of adults. Indeed, it is difficult to maintain composure when your beloved child squeals and hits his head against the wall. We list the most common errors:
- Indulging in whims. If, after crying and rolling on the floor, the grandmother agreed to buy the ill-fated chocolate bar, the next “concert” will not be long in coming.
- Screams and swearing. Hysterical notes in a mother’s voice will only spur a hyperactive child. Children tend to copy the behavior of their parents. When adults allow themselves to lose their temper, it is difficult to expect anything different from a child.
- Assault. By spanking your baby, you are simultaneously admitting your powerlessness. The hysteria will only intensify after this. Your child will not calm down because you slapped him on the head. In addition, this undermines trust in you and causes retaliatory aggressive behavior.
- Affectionate tone, attempts to calm the baby. The tantrum is intended for the audience and will continue as long as you emotionally react to it.
- Threats that are not carried out. They promised to throw away the candy that made the baby cry - do it. Otherwise, the child will understand that you are just scaring him and will not pay attention to empty words.
- Double standards. When dad forbids eating cakes, and mom sneaks them in secretly, the child stops responding to the word “no.” He concludes that what you want can be achieved if you put in a little effort.
How to speed up the appearance of laughter
When does the baby start to sit?
There are several ways to stimulate your baby's laughter:
- Gently stroke your tummy and ribs with your fingers and palms. This will help improve your baby's mood. Touching should be like a massage; you should not tickle the baby too much and cause colic or hiccups.
- Many children like unusual sounds and unusual sensations. For example, you can blow on the baby’s heels, kiss the belly, or press your mouth to the belly and blow out air with a sound. Also, the baby will have fun if mom or dad repeats “apchhi” many times.
- The baby will very quickly learn to laugh if the parents constantly make funny faces or utter bizarre sounds.
Important! If you want to cheer up your child, the main thing is not to overdo it and not to scare it. You need to touch gently and without sudden movements, do not speak loudly and try to do it softly.
You can cheer up your child with a toy
If the baby doesn't laugh or smile
Based on the mere fact of whether a child laughs or not, it is impossible to determine whether he is developing normally or has problems. Several factors will influence laughter: the intelligence of the baby himself, the attention of parents to him, as well as temperament and the habit of expressing emotions in the family as a whole.
Natural causes
There are several reasons:
- Immature nervous system. Here you will just have to wait. If at five months the baby still does not laugh, then this is not a sign of developmental delay. This only means that his time has not yet come.
- Emotionally reserved dad and mom, as well as the rest of the family. If a child does not hear his family laugh, he will have no one to follow as an example.
- The child has inner seriousness and such a temperament. In this case, it will be very difficult to evoke emotions in the baby.
Wet diapers
When the baby is in an uncomfortable situation, he has wet diapers or a diaper that has not been changed for a long time, what kind of laughter can we talk about. Instead of laughter, parents will hear dissatisfied or continuous screaming. The child will calm down only when all causes of discomfort are eliminated.
Worried about pain
If the baby is in pain, then he is clearly not laughing. He begins to scream desperately, bends his knees, becomes very restless, and may gasp.
Brain problems
Lack of laughter may be a sign of organic brain damage. This situation occurs in children who were born prematurely, suffered a difficult birth, suffered from hypoxia during pregnancy, or had an Rh conflict with their mother. Other causes may include cerebral hemorrhage, cerebral edema, ischemia, and neurological pathologies.
Developmental delay
The reason for the lack of laughter may be a delay in physical development, as it is closely related to mental and emotional health. To correct the situation, you need to seek help from a neurologist. You may need to undergo a massage course, or the doctor will prescribe other procedures.
The appearance of the first smile is an important stage in the process of personality formation; parents do not need to focus too much on this. If by three months the baby still has not learned to smile, you need to show him to the pediatrician. After the examination, the doctor will decide whether consultation with other specialists is needed or not. If everything is normal with the baby, parents should reconsider their behavior model, ensure a healthy emotional environment in the family, then the child’s smile and laughter will not keep you waiting.
How does hysteria proceed?
Psychologists claim that a hysterical attack occurs involuntarily in children due to strong emotional arousal. A small child does not know how to express his feelings in words. He himself does not understand what is happening to him. Emotions overwhelm him, and now he is rolling on the floor, hitting his head on objects, scratching himself and those around him, completely “disconnected” from the surrounding reality. In severe cases, convulsive reactions occur (the so-called hysterical bridge).
Seizures in young children usually proceed according to the following scenario:
- The child nonverbally shows his dissatisfaction: he whines, snarls, sniffles, and demonstratively refuses to engage in dialogue. At this stage, the tantrum can be stopped if the baby is distracted.
- The baby begins to scream loudly, often scaring those around him. At the same time, the child no longer hears the adult; it is useless to scold or explain something to him.
- The baby falls to the floor, stomps his feet, throws things. He does not feel pain and can injure himself or another person.
- After the “concert,” the children are exhausted, seek consolation from their parents, and many fall asleep. This is natural - a strong emotional shock exhausts them.
Hysteria in a 2-year-old child is a natural phenomenon. At this time, the baby’s nervous system is imperfect. He does not know how to control his feelings or calm down on his own. It is especially difficult for parents of restless, anxious children who experience frequent mood swings. A hyperactive child also brings many problems. His impulsiveness and excitability leads to frequent hysterics, which are often accompanied by aggressive outbursts.