The sages say that you shouldn’t look for a love relationship on purpose: sincere, real feelings come only when you don’t expect them at all, and fate sometimes waits for us in the most unexpected places. But the desire to improve their personal life literally forces single girls to search for their happiness. To achieve this, any means are used: visiting clubs, discos and other entertainment venues, meeting single men in the company of mutual friends, flirting with a cute work colleague, and, of course, the Internet. Beautiful ladies meet both on social networks and on specialized resources, for example, on the Teamo website. Dating for a serious relationship in all these cases can be both successful and not so successful. Why?
It is difficult for a woman to understand what a man wants in a relationship: her own emotions may well overshadow all rational arguments and prevent her from drawing the right conclusions. This is why very often a relationship with a man ends before it even begins: after a seemingly successful date, a representative of the stronger sex literally disappears from the horizon.
What does sincerity mean?
Sincere feelings are a genuine, natural manifestation of emotions born in a person. The concept of sincerity is based on the word “spark”. A feeling originates as a spark, and immediately manifests itself in the outside world, consistent with the behavior, facial expressions and internal state of a person at the moment of demonstrating a sincere feeling. Sincerity implies:
- manifestation of feelings in a “pure”, unveiled form: joy, sadness, anger, anger, envy;
- human openness;
- honesty;
- clarity of thoughts;
- sincere attitude not only towards other people, but also towards yourself.
Psychology of sincerity
The phenomenon of sincerity in psychology is studied by social psychologists. Sincerity is formed in childhood. A small child does not yet fully understand what his parents require or want from him, but he unmistakably distinguishes the emotional state of his mother and father. Expression clearly manifests itself through facial expressions, gestures, and voice intonation. The mother scolds the child, speaks in an angry voice, but he sees that the face is not angry, which means she is swearing “insincerely”, in make-believe. A person’s sincerity can be read through non-verbal manifestations:
- symmetrical display of emotions on the right and left sides of the face;
- during a conversation, an interested glance towards the interlocutor;
- free coordinated gestures.
Sincerity and honesty - the difference
The concepts of “sincerity” and “honesty” are often considered synonymous; they are similar, but not the same. What is the difference between sincerity and honesty?
- Sincerity
is an emotional phenomenon expressed in a direct manifestation of feelings that is not analyzed by a person: the emotion originated inside and immediately manifested itself in the outside world. - Honesty
is a moral and social phenomenon, comes from “honor”, “respect”, “honor”. Honest people are generally respected in society. Honesty is related to a person's actions. - Sincerity
is the consistency of speech with external manifestations (congruence). - Honesty
– includes sincerity and truthfulness based on moral values.
Be willing to take responsibility when necessary
We feel bad when we make mistakes or make poor judgments, but as adults we should be able to handle it. You should not blame someone or circumstances, as this will not help solve the problem or improve the situation. Taking responsibility for our actions strengthens relationships because when we live with integrity, we can see other people's true emotions, testing how they truly feel about us. Admitting that we have made a mistake is an important step towards improving our personality traits.
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Who can trust you if you constantly place blame on others? Accepting responsibility enables other people to behave in their most authentic way. When they see that you are not afraid to accept the consequences of your actions, they will feel more comfortable and more likely to take responsibility if they make a mistake themselves. This helps to form stronger relationships between people who care about each other, because they know that they may make a mistake, but will receive support and a chance to correct the situation without the threat of breaking up the relationship.
Sincerity - is it needed now?
Sincerity is a character trait, and for people who grew up in a family where any manifestation of feelings was encouraged, it is difficult to restrain themselves emotionally. Such people have a difficult time in society, because sincerity implies the broadcast of both positive and negative emotions. Sincerity is considered a quality of a mature personality, ready to resist ridicule, slander and remain oneself. Sincere feelings will always be in demand because:
- A sincere attitude is important for any person, even those who are insincere themselves.
- In the family, sincerity is an indicator of trust and mature relationships between spouses;
- In the development of a child, sincere emotions and feelings are a necessary element in raising a harmonious personality.
How to test a man for the sincerity of his feelings?
What girl or woman does not dream of mutual feelings with her partner? The degree of sincerity on the part of a man is not always clear, since the stronger sex shows any feelings in measured doses, because by nature a man is “supposed” to be restrained. The sincerity of a partner’s feelings can be recognized by the following criteria:
- a man’s words do not disagree with his actions and actions;
- he likes to take care of the woman he loves;
- in difficult times, he sincerely empathizes and tries to reduce the discomfort of his partner;
- spending time together is important to him;
- gives gifts;
- ready to do anything for the sake of his beloved;
- jealousy within reasonable limits can also be an indicator of sincere feelings.
Don't judge
Almost all of us have judged other people for their choices or actions, but most of these judgments are based on our own insecurities. If we follow our chosen path in life, then it doesn’t matter much to us that someone made a mistake in a relationship or, for example, wears provocative clothes. Other people's choices usually don't detract from our quality of life, so why judge them?
When a person is sincere and in harmony with himself, he can reason about what he likes and dislikes, but is less likely to judge other people when they do things that are not entirely correct from a certain point of view. When we build our lives by adhering to our judgments, we can easily recognize that another person has the right to have a point of view that differs from ours.
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Judgmental tendencies can negatively impact our relationships. Sometimes we spend too much time judging others for their choices, but we don't try to understand why they did a certain thing and accept the desire of others to follow their path.
When we stop judging and simply allow people to be themselves, we have a better chance of creating relationships where everyone can freely express their opinions. Thus, we give this right to ourselves. As long as neither party is causing harm or negatively influencing others, why not learn more about the other person and give them the opportunity to learn more about you.
How to test a woman for the sincerity of her feelings?
Honesty and sincerity are the key to a trusting and successful relationship between a man and a woman. What is sincerity in a relationship, it can be more difficult for the stronger sex to understand whether the beloved is sincere with him or is pretending because of his own selfish goals. Some men, trying to figure this out, go to extremes and begin to watch their girlfriend’s every move. Sincere feelings on the part of the weaker sex are manifested as follows:
- the warmth with which a woman communicates with her lover;
- she gives her feelings without demanding anything in return;
- is sensitive to a man’s flirting with other women;
- sees more positive qualities in a man, and accepts shortcomings as they are;
- devotes a lot of time to appearance in order to be attractive to him;
- is interested with genuine interest in the life of a loved one;
- shares both joy and sadness with his partner.
Sincere feelings
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Real feelings are not always beautiful. The sincerity of the heart cannot be forced to manifest itself in the form of just one pleasing to the eye video sequence of Hollywood films. Living a slightly artificial life, we often refuse to observe the shadows within ourselves, we do not want to see the imperfections of our own person, and as a result, we do not want to recognize the right of a loved one to live and demonstrate his true feelings and emotions.
We have surrounded ourselves with comfortable decorations, we have immersed ourselves in an illusory picture reality, we hide unhealed injuries and unhealed wounds under the matte coating of high efficiency and incredible performance, we have played with rules and business standards, we are much safer being unreal not only in our professional lives, but also in our personal relationships. We demand conformity from ourselves, we demand conformity from our partners, we adjust our lives to some monstrous standards. A strained lifestyle only leads to neurosis, and in this state it is impossible to cultivate a real and deep feeling. Sincere feelings can only appear where there is a safe space.
Each of us has both light and shadow; there are no people in the world who do not make mistakes. “Ideal people” run away from their real selves; they pretend to be who they really are not. No one is perfect, but the trick is that you can recognize the right of a loved one to be imperfect only when you have learned to truly recognize this in yourself. If you've made mistakes and fallen, and then gotten up and tried to pick yourself up again to continue on your path, you know that it's not that easy. And when you have experienced this yourself, you will not blame your loved one for his mistakes, seeing that he is going through similar processes, but will try to help him get through this stage as quickly as possible.
Tolerance and supporting each other along the way is what is important in a relationship. If fears, doubts, pain, hatred, envy, anger and other not-so-bright sides of our character live in each of us, then why don’t we want to recognize the right of another person to have and show the same qualities? Why do we want only the most beautiful things to manifest themselves in our relationships, but we refuse to help the dearest person in the world live through what he cannot cope with on his own. Yes, witnessing the manifestation of anger, despair, sadness, jealousy and other “negative” character traits of a loved one is not the most pleasant thing, but he also tolerates us the same way. Trying to see the good in a person and focusing your attention on the best qualities of your partner, knowing and accepting his difficult sides, but looking at the good that is in each of us is what is important. Forgive, learn to forgive, allow a person to be as real as he can be at a given moment in time. Getting to the water by digging a well sometimes requires a lot of effort, but believe me, it's worth it.
There is no need to look for an ideal partner, become a support environment for your person, help him get to the bottom of clean water within himself, if you have already managed to do this with your inner well. And if you yourself are still in the process, then try to be more tolerant of each other. Two people walking very close can never hide, cannot hide anything. If you take a person as a partner, as a partner, as a friend, then take him as a whole. There is no need to say: “This is what I accept in you, but don’t show this to me,” take it entirely. We always have the best partner we deserve, as well as the best parents, the best children, the best work colleagues. Accept them all exactly as they are, learn to love them exactly as they are, and one day you will be surprised how beautiful the one who is accepted with all his shadows and weaknesses becomes.
It is very important to remember that by allowing loved ones to heal their own wounds next to us, we help to manifest all the real things that are in them.
In each of us there lives a very great fear of being rejected if someone close to us sees us for real, but in each of our close people there lives exactly the same fear. So be the first to say: “It’s okay, it goes as it goes, but I still love you much more than the actions you take.” It’s okay if a loved one loses his temper or has a fight with us, it’s okay if he has doubts or is scared, this happens to each of us. Learn to forgive in relationships, be sure to learn to forgive, after all, what are a certain amount of difficulties and negative emotions compared to the happiness of realizing that such an amazing person lives next to us. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder I wish you happiness!
Dina Richards.
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How to recognize the sincerity of a friend?
Friendship is, first of all, sincerity, as women believe. The very concept of female friendship is very energy-intensive. Women are vulnerable and emotional creatures and in many aspects they are rather rivals to each other: who is more beautiful, more successful, or who is more popular with men. True, sincere friendship between women is of great value and is a gift that should be cherished. Manifestations of a friend's sincerity:
- keeps all secrets and secrets discussed;
- she can “cry into her vest”;
- respects the interests and moral values of a friend;
- sincerely rejoices at successes and is sad when failures follow;
- doesn't flirt with her friends' boyfriends;
- always appropriately expresses a critical opinion if a positive outcome of the situation depends on it;
- understands without words;
- knows how to forgive.
How to develop sincerity?
How to learn sincerity and is it really possible to develop this quality in yourself? Psychologists say that, like any skill, sincerity can be developed through practical actions:
- Communication with sincere people
. If you pay attention, such people seem to be surrounded by special energy and charisma; others are drawn to them. An insincere person does not attract such attention. - Reading relevant psychological literature
. It is useful because tasks are given step by step to improve the skill of sincerity. - Getting rid of complexes
. Often indecisiveness, timidity and shyness prevent one from being sincere with others; any step towards sincerity causes painful thoughts about one’s imperfection and the fear of “what will they think of me?” - Openness
. If the environment inspires trust, why not try to open up, show your kindness, warmth and concern even to strangers. This is the only way a person can gain the experience of sincere self-expression. - Working with speech
. Cold intonations in the voice can be signs of insincerity or indifference.
Express your personal opinion when asked
Sometimes it's easier to agree with everyone, but by doing so we do a disservice to both those around us and ourselves. Agreeing to avoid confrontation deprives both parties of honest and effective communication. When you are asked to give your opinion regarding a movie, song, or work issue, try to answer honestly. If you disagree with another person's position, be polite and respectful, but don't be afraid to voice your point of view.
You offer your opinion as an alternative option, rather than trying to argue or attack someone. In most cases, a person will react adequately; he will be interested in listening to you and learning another point of view. This will make your communication more interesting and will give each of you the opportunity to learn and grow.
It is important to note that sincerity must be shown when you are asked to express your opinion. This is not the same as expressing your attitude to any things whenever you want. There is a time and place that is ideal for speaking your mind. Not every person and situation predisposes to this.
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