For women, on the contrary, it is always important to know how men treat them, especially if they want to finally find their long-awaited betrothed. However, it is not at all difficult to figure out that a man is in love, but hides his feelings and therefore does not dare to take the first step towards developing a relationship. If we consider his behavior and actions in more detail, one can unmistakably understand whether these very feelings exist at all and how strong they are.
What is love
Women's opinion
Most women believe that if a man loves her, she will certainly feel and see it. A person in love, in the view of the fair half of humanity, constantly shows signs of attention to the object of sympathy. If a guy rarely calls, rarely invites you on dates, is not particularly generous, and is not interested in the girl’s affairs, then she will think that the boyfriend does not have serious feelings for her.
Most often, women believe that a man’s love is manifested in the actions that they are ready to do for the sake of their chosen ones. Material confirmation of feelings is also important - even if a guy makes small surprises for his beloved, she understands that, most likely, she is not indifferent to him. Also, a woman is usually convinced that a man in love will not be interested in someone else, and if she catches him flirting with a certain lady, then it is quite possible that she will lose faith in his love.
Men's opinion
The overwhelming number of men agree with women in the opinion that love inevitably implies care and various signs of attention. In part, they expect from their chosen one the attitude that their mother showed towards them. In their opinion, a loving woman should be interested in the affairs of her loved one, not deny him intimacy, admire him, listen to his opinion, and the like.
From a psychological point of view
Love comes in different forms, and everyone can express this feeling in their own way. For example, a man may feel an all-consuming and passionate love for one woman. Being infatuated with this woman, he will always strive for physical possession of her.
Over time, feelings may fade away, and the same man will fall in love with another woman, but this time the nature of his love will manifest itself differently - sexual interest will not be expressed as clearly as before, and now the man will strive to take care of his chosen one, patronage.
That is, a man can experience completely different feelings for different women throughout his life, but every time it will be love.
How to push a man to take action
If everything is so complicated, how can you understand that a man is in love but is hiding his feelings? To find out, you can resort to feminine tricks.
Method No. 1. If you and your admirer are planning an event with friends, allow yourself some light flirting. Let one of the stronger sex look after you a little. For this purpose, you can even negotiate with one of the party participants. Next, just watch what the man’s reaction will be. Changes in his behavior will indicate that he cares about you.
Signs of a person in love
So, you feel like you're in love with someone, but how can you tell for sure? There are several obvious signs.
1. Suspiciousness
You think for a long time about every random phrase thrown by the object of your sympathy, trying to find some secret and very important meaning in it. You can interpret ordinary words in a completely unexpected way - both for the better and for the worse for yourself. Even if the guy just said “Hello!” to you, you try again and again to remember the intonation with which the greeting was said to determine how your lover treats you.
2. Curiosity
You are trying to find out as much information as possible about the past and present of the man you like. You are interested in literally everything that has to do with him - who he has met before, where he works, what he is interested in, who he is friends with, what his character is. Subsequently, you can go further - find the guy’s ex-lover on the Internet, study her page in detail, trying to understand what attracted the chosen one to this girl.
3. Jealousy
You find it unbearable to think that the person you love could be attracted to someone other than you. It is unpleasant for you if he shows signs of attention to someone, and you react painfully to information that he is interested in someone. If your chosen one is registered on social networks, you carefully study his profile in order to find out with whom he communicates most.
4. Ingenuity
If in the near future you do not have reasons for meetings and correspondence, you yourself try to find them, or even invent them. Knowing where the object of your affection works or studies, you can “completely accidentally” end up in that area. Also, you will not miss the opportunity to write a message or call the guy you like, even if the reason for this seems very unconvincing.
5. Unusual behavior
In the presence of your lover, you behave completely differently than usual, and at the same time two extremes can be noted. In the first case, you begin to feel shy and withdrawn into yourself; sometimes it is physically difficult for you to start a conversation with the person you have fallen in love with. As a rule, such changes in behavior are immediately noticed by mutual friends. In the second case, you begin to show unprecedented activity. You want to impress your loved one - you start talking loudly and a lot, joke out of place, laugh often and fuss.
6. Change of mood
You are increasingly observing yourself changing moods. You can spend the whole morning, smiling happily, pondering what the prospects for your potential relationship might be. After just a couple of hours, you may be in a gloomy and depressed mood, without receiving the desired sign of attention from your lover, or even for no apparent reason. If you don’t yet know whether your love is mutual, then you may constantly be thrown from a feeling of euphoria to absolute confusion and emptiness.
7. Desire to become better
You want to delight the man you love and please him. Pursuing such a goal, a woman often decides to change her style, and often they can be very unusual. Now you spend more time in front of the mirror, carefully selecting your wardrobe and thinking through your makeup.
8. Willingness to “adapt” to his taste
Did you find out that your lover used to prefer to date dark-haired girls, but you yourself are a platinum blonde? The information revealed can push you to make decisive changes and force you to go to the hairdresser to change your hair color. Did you find out that the guy you like is interested in football? Even if you were previously far from the world of sports, now you are starting to become interested in which players play on your favorite team and on what days the matches take place. Such examples can relate to almost everything - appearance, character, manner of dressing, hobbies, and the like.
Why do men hide their feelings?
Often the reasons for an adult man’s secrecy lie in his first love experience, when a boy, while still a teenager, takes timid steps towards the girl he likes.
And this experience is not always positive. The fear of rejection persists at the subconscious level and carries over into adulthood. Another option involves the desire to keep your first love a secret from the whole world.
And in adult life, a man also subconsciously tries to hide his feelings from everyone, even from the object of his desire. Some representatives of the stronger sex justify this behavior with the desire to establish control over the development of events, when only he decides whether he needs to openly express his feelings, or whether it is worth keeping his relationship with a woman secret.
There are many options, and they all directly depend on the characteristics of the man’s character.
Male hunter
This type of representatives of the stronger sex prefers not to take risks, but to systematically and persistently achieve their goals. This only increases the value of the extraction. Such men will hide their love until they are completely confident in their own victory.
All their actions are akin to a game. It arouses interest, beckons, but for the time being remains an impregnable rock. And only at the right moment, in his opinion, does a man allow him to win his heart, despite the fact that the chosen one has long been not against showing reciprocal feelings.
Male philosopher
Such a man is too comfortable in his world to change anything suddenly. He is not ready to act spontaneously, relying on the fact that what is destined to come true will definitely come true. You just need to wait for a favorable combination of circumstances, but in the meantime you should be careful. Doubts and fear leave such men no other choice.
Indecisiveness
One of the most commonplace reasons, in most cases due to lack of experience. He hides his true feelings for a long time, fearing being ridiculed or rejected.
Negative experiences in the past
A series of past failures forces a man to act carefully and, if possible, protect himself from female cunning. Such an experience deprives him of self-confidence, makes him weak and vulnerable. Confessing his feelings for him is the same as exposing himself to another blow, while secrecy helps him feel protected.
Male infantilism
This kind of representatives of the stronger sex remained boys. They are burdened by the thought of the responsibility that they will have to take on. A man expects everything to miraculously resolve itself.
Love or infatuation - what's the difference?
Of course, love and being in love are not the same thing! What are the key differences between these feelings that some people often confuse?
How to recognize love
- Love does not appear suddenly, out of nowhere - it is simply impossible. It appears gradually, occupying more and more space in your life. By communicating with a person again and again, and getting to know him from new sides, you understand that your feeling for him is becoming deeper and more conscious.
- It may take months or years to get rid of this feeling - it slowly establishes itself in your life, and also gradually leaves it.
- If you are in love, then you are not capable of being carried away by another person for a while. Your chosen one is the only man in whom you are sincerely interested.
- You do not idealize your lover, but clearly see all his shortcomings. Nevertheless, you accept that your loved one is not ideal, and appreciate him exactly as he is, without trying to “fit” him into some perfect image of yourself.
- Love makes you better. You find inspiration for new achievements. Even if your loved one chose not you, but you know that he is happy, then you are not angry or jealous - you completely accept this outcome.
Differences between infatuation and love
- Falling in love can swell instantly. Just yesterday you did not know about the existence of this person, but today you are already imagining how you will marry him and give birth to children.
- This feeling can disappear from life as quickly as it flared up. Having been disappointed in your chosen one, you can be sad or cry for a couple of days, but having met an equally interesting guy, turn your attention to him and plunge headlong into a new romance.
- If a girl declares that she loves two young men at the same time, and does not know how to decide on her feelings, then in fact there is no love in her life. There is love, infatuation, lust, passion, but not love.
- You tend to idealize the guy you like. Subsequently, you begin to understand that this person is not what you imagined him to be before, and you may even say: “You are not the one I fell in love with.” This is true, you were fascinated by a fictitious image that did not have much in common with a real person. Now you got to know this guy better and the former charm with him began to melt away.
- Sometimes you realize that this feeling is destroying you. You become irritable or jealous, making more and more claims to your lover. You may also fall into a state of depression if the guy does not live up to the expectations placed on him.
How to determine that these are real feelings and not a habit
1.
Think about it: would you want to build a relationship with this person if you initially knew all his shortcomings and could roughly guess how your relationship would develop in the future? If love lives in your heart, then you will answer this question in the affirmative.
2.
Also, in order to dispel doubts, you can imagine next to you a man who, according to your ideas, can be called ideal. Determine for yourself, would you exchange your chosen one for this “perfect” person? If your relationship is more about habit than love, then you will choose an unattainable ideal.
3.
Another good test would be a separate vacation. If you understand that you are quite comfortable without your chosen one, you don’t want to share the brightest moments of your journey with him, then probably your love for him has passed.
4.
If you increasingly catch yourself thinking that you like another man or the objects of your affection are constantly changing, then, apparently, only habit is keeping you with your current boyfriend or husband.
What should I do if I'm in love and he doesn't notice?
Get his attention.
Of course, if the young man who is attracted to you does not notice you, then the most logical thing would be to try to attract his attention. If you are unfamiliar, then find him on a social network and write a message. To get started, just try to make acquaintances. If you already know each other and see each other periodically, then you have a chance to attract him with a change in your image.
Find out about his tastes.
We can talk about both his hobbies and the girls he liked before. try to determine which type is most preferable for him, whether you have anything in common with this type and whether you can somehow get closer to him. also find out what the guy is passionate about. Perhaps these hobbies will seem interesting to you, and subsequently you will become close precisely on this basis.
Find new interests.
Try to become more interesting for your chosen one, since he is not yet showing interest. You can find many exciting hobbies that will increase your self-esteem and present you in a new light in the eyes of your lover.
If the guy is much younger or older
Such relationships have their pros and cons. Let's look at them in more detail.
Pros and cons if the guy is older
Both boys and girls see benefits in such relationships. Many men like to feel like they are leading in a relationship, to be a mentor and patron for their chosen one, and it is easier to achieve this in a relationship with a partner who is much younger. Young girls also often strive for relationships with older guys - as a rule, such chosen ones are much more successful than the girl’s peers, can share life experience, stand confidently on their feet and are able to provide financial support.
The disadvantages of such relationships often stem from their advantages. As she grows older, the girl no longer needs the advice and support of a man, and she begins to be annoyed by his guardianship and authoritarianism.
Pros and cons if the guy is younger
Recently, more and more often there are couples in which the girl is much older than her partner. Disillusioned with their peers, tired of their busy careers and pragmatism, girls begin to look for romance, and often lovers who turn out to be younger than them can provide them with such feelings. Guys see their advantages in such a relationship - they like that their partner is more experienced and in many ways seems more interesting to them than their peers - while the chosen one, most often, looks no worse than them, and in some ways is superior.
The disadvantage for a woman can be a feeling of self-doubt. It begins to seem to her that the guy will soon get tired of such a romance, and he will turn his attention to younger girls.
Is it possible to check if a man loves you?
In matters of love, it is difficult to come up with better advice than listening to your heart. From the first days you should not be puzzled by the issue of developing a relationship with a man.
Give yourself and the prospective fan the opportunity to sort out your own feelings, take a closer look, get used to the person’s character and draw the right conclusions. Thanks to the intuition inherent in all women, you can discern something that cannot be verified by any other means.
And if it’s difficult to be sure of a man’s feelings, then it’s possible to push things a little. Sometimes for this it is enough to express reciprocal emotions, for example, smile at him, give him a compliment, show sincere interest in his problems and affairs. After such gestures, it will be difficult for a man to resist, and he will most likely show his true attitude towards you. A little patience and feminine wisdom, and the result will not take long to arrive.
Unrequited love
Many women face unrequited feelings, but if you put in some effort, you can overcome it. Spend time with your friends more often, meet new people, occupy your days with interesting activities, and you will have less and less opportunity and desire to indulge in thoughts about a failed relationship.
A change of environment can also help you. Go on an exciting journey - you will probably come back with completely different thoughts.
The most important thing is not to get hung up on a person who is not interested in you. Stop following his life and don't try to get in touch with him if he doesn't want to. Also, stop stalking or calling him intrusively. The best thing you can do for yourself now is to completely erase him from your life. Otherwise, you risk being depressed for a long time.
Monitor your own behavior
- You choose outfits more often and more carefully, making sure you look perfect. No one disputes that the behavior could have been similar before. However, with the onset of falling in love, self-care turns into a phobia. You constantly think about your appearance.
- You began to carry out various cosmetic procedures to care for your face and body more often. We started eating less and taking better care of our figure, nails and hair. Such manipulations are carried out in order to draw a man’s attention to you.
- You become fixated on your lover and spend more time learning useful information about him. You begin to be interested in everything connected with him. Roughly speaking, you are creating a dossier for yourself on a man. The more you immerse yourself in information, the more violent your emotions become.
- You can unobtrusively meet your chosen one in a club or his favorite bar. This way, you have a better chance of attracting a guy's interest outside of the work environment. You will do everything in your power to “accidentally” see him again.
- If everything is done correctly, close communication with your lover cannot be avoided. Remember that you should control yourself, otherwise things may not turn out as you planned. In this case, mistakes may be disastrous and you will not have a future.
- When attracting attention, remember that you need to behave with dignity. Revealing outfits and vulgar behavior are unacceptable. Be yourself, try to meet by chance. Conquer the guy with your sincerity and ease. Be real.
how to behave on a first date with a man
Statistics and interesting facts
- As it turns out, when meeting guys, they often pay attention to their face rather than their figure. If they like a girl’s face, then this is enough to fall in love, even if her figure is far from perfect.
- Most often, a guy's sympathy can be aroused by a girl whose facial features he finds something in common with his own facial features. In general, any coincidence in hobbies and outlook on life can provoke the appearance of falling in love.
- Having fallen in love, a person becomes more absent-minded.
- Communication with a loved one can cause a special reaction in a guy or girl, similar to intoxication.
