Option 2. Suffering
If you agree with at least one or two of these statements, it's time to take care of yourself.
It sounds like you are having a hard time in life, and the saddest thing is that most often you have absolutely no idea how to cope with difficulties in order to feel better. Most likely, solving life's problems will require tangible efforts on your part, and a psychologist will always support and guide you along this path. If you agreed with three or more statements, go to option 3.
Why is it important to know yourself?
“I lost myself and now I live as if at the mercy of fate. I have gone too far that now it is difficult for me to get out of the vicious circle. How can I sort everything out if I’m distracted by a lot and can’t concentrate on what’s important?” A similar thought may arise in every girl who is going through a crisis in her family life, at work, or who doesn’t even know what to do next.
If everything was fine yesterday, and today you see yourself sliding to the social bottom, it’s time to ring the bell. Anxiety due to external factors (boss, girlfriend, boyfriend) and internal factors (complexes about appearance, low self-esteem) together destroy a holistic picture of the world.
If one element is missing that brings a boost of energy, made coffee in the morning or brought in a good profit, then disgusting thoughts themselves begin to creep into your head. Are you confused in yourself, but the world around you does not adapt to you and is increasingly confusing you? You need to stock up on ambition to get out of the “rat race”, which is already sickening. That is, stop blaming everything, shut yourself in, first of all, don’t walk down a slippery road, but look soberly at the situation as a whole.
Take the self-esteem test
“Okay, but how do you recognize yourself if you’ve been in a broken state for a long time. This has been going on for like a year now. Alcohol, feelings of depression, lost work and constant surfing on the Internet - all this took away the ability to think sensibly. How can I start thinking about change if I don’t understand where I can find a way out? Many people don’t even imagine what could happen to them in the near future.
The presence of social benefits, the company of people who bring us pleasure, relationships, and above all, status - all this is not immune to sudden changes. Fraudsters stole savings, and now dreams of owning a home have flown away, “like plywood over Paris.”
For many girls, the first romance is a signal for the creation of strong family relationships... and then the same man is already secretly dating another. We are tormented by failures on the way to a good job, opening a business, trying to please “important” people. All this falls on a person who was not prepared for such a turn of events. He completely withdraws into himself, without even considering a second chance or an alternative path.
A state of unawareness makes a person a victim, because he simply did not expect such a turn of events. The sad fate turns a once self-confident, successful, healthy girl into a kind of sad substance that has sunk to the very bottom. In a fit of anger at the world around us, we protect ourselves from those who are able to help us and appreciate us. Selfishness can make a person rude, irritable, and pessimistic, which already reduces the chance of getting back on his feet. The longer we stay in this state, the faster our prospects crumble.
If you think “I have lost myself because of the problems that have befallen me,” then it is better to ask “how to more effectively avoid them and not allow them to influence you?” It’s like falling into a puddle and deciding to stay there rather to shake off the dirt. The state of a “lost person” can be compared to a logical problem. The more you twist one situation or idea, the more difficult it will be to unravel this Rubik's cube.
Often, trifles and minor troubles can throw us off track for a long time. Why blame yourself after a serious failure, feel remorse, or go into long thoughts, if you can avoid repeating it. Relationships that have already passed bring heartache, obsessive thoughts for many months... but why? Why concentrate on what has already passed through, it is better to take care of a better future while there is time. In general, when you are confused in yourself, it is important not to stay in this state for long. So we are not far from complete chaos both in our heads and in our lives.
Option 3. On the edge
If you gave at least one or two positive answers to the previous questions, most likely you are having difficulty coming to terms with some feelings, thoughts or circumstances.
Contact a specialist. If you recognize yourself in three or more statements from the current list, your problem is deeper than you might think. The very fact that you are honest with yourself about your condition is a good sign: you are still mentally stable and able to think adequately. But the sooner you start working with a psychotherapist on past traumas and current conditions, the more effective the result will be.
Option 4. Urgently need help!
Sometimes something like this happens to me:
When any of these symptoms appear, a red light comes on in your head.
It's time to seek help from a psychiatrist, and this does not mean that you are crazy. Such manifestations only indicate that serious disturbances have appeared in your life, psyche, and perhaps even in the functioning of your brain, which need to be eliminated before they become dangerous. And when the acute condition passes, you can seek support and accompaniment from a psychotherapist or psychologist.
consultation with a psychologistpsychological testspsychotherapytherapytests
Questions
It is recommended that you ask yourself the following questions throughout the day. You just have a free minute, think about your answer.
Human psychology is such that he will try to ignore the most unpleasant topics, not notice them, and put them off until better times.
This is indicated by protective mechanisms; the psyche thus strives to maintain health and peace of mind. Because I’m not sure whether I can cope with the emotions that may arise in response to some painful topic.
The difficulty is that sometimes these mechanisms do not protect, but, on the contrary, limit. Therefore, it is still important, despite fear and anxiety, to overcome your experiences and try to touch the secret corners of your soul.
To be sincere with yourself. This allows you to live a conscious and quality life.
Questions about myself and the feelings I experience
- What can surprise me?
- What am I excited about?
- What exactly makes me angry?
- Why am I furious?
- Am I capable of feeling tenderness? If yes, then to whom, and at what moments?
- How do I perceive criticism addressed to me?
- What can make me happy, no matter what?
- What am I most afraid of?
- What feelings do I experience most often lately?
- What can cause me to lose control of myself and my feelings?
- Is there anything I'm ashamed of?
- Where exactly can I feel safe? Near what people?
- What can calm and relax me?
- At what moments can I say with confidence that I am happy?
- Am I a touchy person? And if I am offended, what needs to happen for me to calm down and continue communication?
- What exactly can offend me, hurt me?
- What gives me energy and restores resources?
- What feelings are the most intolerable for me?
- And how do I deal with them? Do I avoid them, try not to notice them?
- What do I do when I feel ashamed?
About life and relationships with others
- That I can never forgive under any circumstances?
- What do I value most in other people?
- What is the first thing I pay attention to when meeting someone?
- What can attract me to another person so that I want to be friends with him or build closer relationships?
- What qualities are completely unacceptable to me?
- How do I compete with other people? For example, do I prefer to take by stealth, or do I act aggressively?
- How do I deal with envy? What do I do if someone close to me turns out to be more successful or has what I dreamed of?
- How do people around me treat me? Do they value me? If yes, then for what?
- What life principles are inviolable for me?
- Can it be said that I am an open and sincere person? And are there people around whom it is safe for me to be myself?
- How am I similar to my family, and how, on the contrary, am I very different from them?
- Are there people in my environment whom I can turn to for help at any time, and they will not refuse me, at least in support?
- What kind of relationship do I dream about? That is, what should a partner do, what should he be like, so that I feel that this is really what I wanted?
- When I'm angry, how do I make it clear to the other person?
- How do I show attention to people close to me?
- How do I care for those I love?
- If I don't like a person, how do I behave with him?
- How do I usually end relationships? And what has to happen for me to want to break them?
- Do I know how to say goodbye to people, to part for a while?
- What does betrayal mean to me?
To think about the future, past and present
- What am I aiming for? What do I dream about?
- Where do I see myself in a year, five years, or even ten?
- What kind of people do I see next to me in a few years? Why?
- What bad habits do I want to get rid of in the future?
- What am I doing now to free myself from them?
- Am I happy with the way my life is going?
- If I had the opportunity to go back in time, what period would I go to and what would I want to change?
- What do I know about my ancestors? Who were they, where did they live, when and from what did they die?
- Do I always finish my tasks? If not, at what stage do I give up?
- What does success mean to me?
- What do I mean by the concept of “love”?
- What is my happiest memory from childhood?
- Who would I like to meet now that I haven't met since I was very young?
- If I had the opportunity to say something to loved ones who have already died, what would it be?
- Who is no longer in my life, but I would really like to thank for participating in it?
- Are there situations in my life history that I could not cope with and that still make themselves felt in my present? If so, how can I resolve these difficulties?
- If I were given the opportunity to fulfill one wish, what would I choose?
- Do I have enemies? If so, how do we show hostility towards each other?
- What do I do to stay close to the people I love?
- What is difficult for me in close relationships?
To know yourself
- What are my strong personality traits?
- In what way am I better than the people around me?
- And in what ways do I fall short of them?
- What should I pay attention to in order to become better, stronger, more resilient?
- What are my restrictions?
- What inspires me and motivates me to move forward?
- What would I like to take from my parents' family and use in my own?
- And what mistakes of my parents, on the contrary, would I not want to make?
- What would I like to learn?
- What hobby would I like to take up?
- What makes me different from other people?
- What do I usually think about before going to bed?
- When do I feel like I'm alive?
- Can I say that I am a faithful person?
- How do I correct my mistakes? And am I even capable of admitting that I do them?
- What do I usually judge and criticize myself for?
- How can I describe myself? It is advisable to choose at least 10 qualities.
- How much time and effort do I devote to my own development?
- What am I to blame for?
- What do I not want to admit about myself?
Daily questions to yourself
- How did I sleep last night?
- Is something bothering me? If so, what and for what reason?
- What exactly do I want at this moment?
- How can I realize this desire of mine?
- What can I do for myself that is pleasant and useful right now?
- What can I thank myself for?
- Do I have any interesting things to do today, ones that arouse curiosity and a desire to complete them? If not, what could it be?
- What mood am I in now?
- What did I dream about last night?
- What good happened to me today?
- What do I want to fill today with?
- How can I take care of my health today, right now?
- Have I done something useful today that I can be proud of? If not, do I plan to?
- What can I do now to relax and unwind?
- Am I in the place where I want to be? And with those people?
- What can make me smile now?
- Did I do something good and pleasant today for my loved ones? Did I tell them that they were valuable and dear to me?
- What steps have I taken today towards my dream?
- What have I learned today, what new things have I discovered?
- What difficulties did I face today?
