We stop at that age when love is not enough
Each step is characterized by need, that is, how much we need parental care and love changes from year to year.
Trust is formed in early childhood, so at this time in life, love is expressed through the mother's care and attention to the needs of her child. If at this stage the mother's attachment is not constant or she refuses the child, mistrust and excessive fear may develop.
In adulthood, it is difficult to establish contact with this type of person. When they start a relationship, they usually feel the need to prove something to the other person, and the other person needs to show loyalty. When it comes to closer interpersonal relationships, they may feel vulnerable and defenseless.
Types of rigidity
In psychology, personality consistency is a complex term. This feature can affect different areas of people’s lives, so scientists have introduced several types of rigid psyche. Each type of rigidity has positive and negative sides.
- Cognitive
Persistence of psychological reactions affecting cognitive abilities. First of all, we are talking about thinking and intelligence. A person cannot change his views and conclusions while receiving new information. For example, a child with such a character trait experiences difficulties in studying literature due to the focus on concrete everyday thinking. In this case, reasoning about abstract characters and events is difficult. Cognitive constancy negatively affects the effectiveness of acquiring new knowledge and skills.
- Motivational
The persistence of developed models of obtaining satisfaction from life, which does not allow one to develop and find new areas of activity. People with this character trait easily give up certain activities due to failure. A stubborn character does not make it possible to change one’s lifestyle even if the current attitudes do not completely suit the person. There is a fixation on already developed simple models of satisfying one’s own needs. It is difficult to convince a person of anything due to a low emotional response, so such people often remain captive of their beliefs until the end of their lives.
- Emotional or affective
Low level of development of emotional intelligence, affecting the response of the psyche to internal and external influences. The range of mood changes and emotional expression is extremely small, so people with this personality trait tend to focus on the same experiences. For example, a person may constantly remember an event and derive pleasure from long-experienced emotions. New events and unfamiliar experiences do not interest him. This type of rigidity has an extremely negative impact on the quality of interpersonal interactions.
It is necessary to pay attention to the fact that all types of psychological constancy are characterized by the appearance of an overvalued idea. It is a form of obsession with certain thoughts, emotions and goals. The patient may spend all his free time achieving objectively unimportant goals. All other aspects of life do not evoke an emotional response.
At 2-3 years
A few years later, at the age of 2 or 3, the child learns to be independent and develops self-control. If parents prevent him from developing these aspects, for example, by always doing what the child can do independently and without difficulty, or, conversely, by expecting the child to do impossible things, they can create a feeling of shame. On the other hand, if parents continue to correct their children without understanding the natural needs of their age, they are likely to have difficulty controlling the world around them and, therefore, controlling themselves.
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As adults, instead of feeling confident, they feel like others are always analyzing them in detail and treating them with suspicion or disapproval. They may also have symptoms of obsessive-compulsive disorder and persecutory delusions.
Causes and clinical examples of demonstrative personality type
The demonstrative or stuck type of personality is one of the character accentuations, which is characterized by egocentrism, a thirst for recognition, and a desire to be in the center of everyone's attention.
A demonstrative personality is prone to posing and performing actions designed to produce an external effect.
Psychiatry and psychology can consider such pronounced accentuations of character as a personality disorder requiring psychotherapeutic correction.
The theory of accentuated personalities was first proposed by K. Leonhard in 1968; subsequently, other scientists and psychologists continued to study this issue, proposing new methods for diagnosing accentuations and their detailed characteristics.
The method for identifying accentuated character traits, developed by Leonhard, includes a number of questions, from the answers to which one can draw a conclusion about the patient’s personality type. A revised and expanded test was also proposed by another psychologist A. Lichko.
Both questionnaires are widely used in modern psychology, and although the names of personality types vary, the general characteristics remain unchanged.
Thus, a stuck personality according to Leonhard corresponds to a personality of a paranoid or paranoid type according to Lichko, a demonstrative type is equated to a hysterical one, a pedantic type to an asthenic type, etc.
Main manifestations
Accentuations are an extreme expression of a normal personality, causing a predisposition to the occurrence of various psychosomatic pathologies.
Considering the personality characteristics of the demonstrative type, it can be noted that there are other accentuations that are largely similar in their manifestations.
If we generalize them, then we can talk about such a concept as an antisocial personality, which to one degree or another includes:
- Demonstrative personality. Characterized by a constant desire to be in the center of attention, a tendency to fantasize, and eccentricity. The feelings of such people are often superficial and lack depth, but this does not prevent them from getting along with others quite easily. Among individuals with a demonstrative character, creative individuals predominate, easily changing their interests and hobbies;
- Pedantic personality. The main features here are punctuality, suspiciousness, and increased anxiety. Often such people are characterized by altruistic manifestations, adherence to principles, and determination;
- Stuck personality. Such individuals are characterized by a concentration on some mono-idea, authoritarianism, a tendency to form delusional ideas, and have a fairly high self-esteem;
- Excitable personality type. Such people, perhaps, can be more classified as antisocial individuals, since they are characterized by sudden outbursts of aggression, anger, and a tendency to unpredictable, often inappropriate actions, which they themselves explain by the incorrect behavior of others.
An antisocial personality disorder may represent a personality disorder that constitutes the so-called “marginal” group, approaching psychosis and affective disorders.
An antisocial personality, as a separate type of accentuation, is characterized by a tendency to immoral and even criminal acts, and rejection of generally accepted norms and rules. Such people literally contrast public morality with their own morality.
A personality of this type can be called conflicting, since any events and actions of others are perceived by her exclusively in a negative way.
The demonstrative or stuck personality type is interesting because it equally contains both positive and negative aspects.
Thus, under favorable conditions, a person develops a positive character, and under the influence of various negative factors, a negative one.
The advantage of this type of character is undoubtedly that a person tries by any means to surpass those around him, which means he achieves really high results in various areas of his life.
When hysterical traits predominate, a person, on the contrary, may experience extreme complacency for no apparent reason.
Paranoid individuals, as a rule, do not have such an ability for self-hypnosis, and therefore they have to seek recognition from others for real actions and achievements. However, such ambition often turns into a negative trait.
An antisocial personality has a similar feature, who responds to any public protest with aggression and hostility.
Possible reasons
Antisocial personality, like other personality types, usually begins to develop in childhood. Scientists were able to find out that a certain role in this process belongs to heredity, as well as to the methods of education that were adopted in the family.
Often too strict, authoritarian upbringing with increased demands on the child contributes to the formation of an excitable, demonstrative or conflict-ridden personality.
Contradictory upbringing can have an equally detrimental effect on a child’s psyche, when parents themselves cannot find a common language with each other and adhere to different approaches to education.
Establishing the reasons that led to the formation of one or another character accentuation is important for carrying out effective correction.
Psychotherapeutic influence is not always necessary, but only in cases where certain character traits are so pronounced that they prevent the individual from interacting normally in society.
We should also not forget that the predominance of demonstrative or other traits can contribute to the development of certain psychopathological conditions.
Clinical examples
To consider in more detail how demonstrative accentuation can lead to the formation of a positive or negative character, we can consider real examples that took place in the clinical practice of psychologists and psychotherapists.
So, consider the example of Mr. B., born at the beginning of the 20th century into a wealthy bourgeois family. His mother was distinguished by a calm, quiet disposition, his father was the owner of a large enterprise and was considered a fair, purposeful person. B himself
From a young age, he was distinguished by the ambition characteristic of all demonstrative personalities; he reacted very sharply to any criticism or low grades. He graduated with honors and quickly moved up the career ladder, standing out for his erudition and energy.
It is worth noting that this man not only made high demands on those around him, but also served as an example to follow. Throughout his life, and especially after the First World War, B.
More than once he had to start everything from scratch, but difficulties only gave him even greater determination, and he achieved the highest positions not thanks to his acquaintances, but due to his own achievements.
Thus, until adulthood, B.’s accentuated character played exclusively into his hands, but in old age, negative sides also appeared.
At the age of sixty, having lost his former authority, he began to show hostility towards his superiors and younger employees, and to acutely feel injustice towards himself.
Now the traits of a stuck demonstrative personality encourage him only to fruitless confrontation with his superiors and more successful colleagues.
As another example, consider a musician who, as a child, did not show much interest in studying, but was interested in playing the violin.
Thanks to his ambition, this man built a brilliant career, although he constantly had clashes with leaders and never agreed to make even minimal concessions. All this forced the talented musician to constantly change jobs.
As a result of such emotional overload, at the age of fifty he developed professional neurosis. This suggests that ambition in this case, even in the most successful years, could not always compensate for sensitivity and excitability.
Both subjects were not mentally ill, although both had signs of incipient psychopathology.
Diagnostics and correction
A demonstrative, pedantic, excitable or otherwise accentuated personality can be identified using special tests and questionnaires. Treatment is usually carried out using psychotherapeutic techniques, which are selected individually.
The main goal of the therapeutic course is to teach the patient to use his character traits for good, to control his own behavior and emotions.
Systematic conversations can be held with the patient, forming a clear idea that the best and most reliable way to attract the attention and recognition of others is socially useful activity.
It is important to understand that a person with a demonstrative type of character, who has not developed a single useful, interesting skill, can turn into an antisocial, hysterical person. This can be prevented by identifying such accentuations from childhood and adolescence and carrying out appropriate corrective work with predisposed individuals.
Source: https://ODepressii.ru/narusheniya/lichnosti/demonstrativniy-tip.html
At 3-6 years old
Between the ages of 3 and 6, love is expressed by encouraging independence, supporting initiative, curiosity, and creativity. If parents do not allow their child to behave autonomously at this stage and always respond with punishment, they will create a huge sense of guilt in the child.
The adult life of a person with such deprivation is characterized by a lack of attention to problem solving, setting goals and achieving them. In addition, persistent guilt can cause passivity, impotence or frigidity, as well as psychotic behavior.
Brain and rigidity
The main organ responsible for cognitive abilities is the brain. This is a complex anatomical structure formed by numerous neurons and their processes. Brain cells form large sections responsible for performing certain functions, such as maintaining breathing and motor activity. The long processes of neurons form nerve bundles and fibers that transmit electrical impulses to different parts of the body. Impulse transmission is the main mechanism of brain activity. Intelligence, thinking and emotions are also largely determined by the transfer of information from one neuron to another. Cognitive processes occur in the highest part of the brain called the cerebral cortex.
During the process of evolution, the functions of the brain gradually changed and developed. At first, this organ was responsible exclusively for the higher regulation of the activities of organs and tissues. Parts of the brain supported heartbeat, breathing, movement, hormonal activity and other physiological functions. All these processes can be called extremely rigid, since the range of changes in physiological activity is determined by functions predetermined by genes. That is, the body’s DNA immediately determines how cardiac activity will respond to certain external and internal changes. All the “rigid” parts of the brain associated with the control of physiology remain in humans, but evolution also gave humans the most variable part of the nervous system.
The cerebral cortex allows a person to consciously interact with the outside world and survive by changing his behavior. Abstract thinking makes it possible to study the properties of objects in isolation from their direct use. These are variable functions of the nervous system that develop throughout life. New experience is necessary to abandon established cognitive stereotypes and form new thinking patterns. Accordingly, the rigidity of higher nervous activity is rather a negative characteristic, since the possibilities of conscious activity are limited.
School
At school age, hard work and love for work develop. If doubts arise about the child's abilities at this stage, the child's desire to continue his studies will be threatened, creating feelings of inferiority that will undermine his or her ability to be an active and productive person in society in the future.
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If children perceive school success and work as the only criteria that determine success, as adults they are likely to become the so-called “working mass”, characterized by a pre-established hierarchy.
So I suggest reaching out to your inner child and helping it grow. To do this, look at yourself as a child or just think about the child who lives inside you. How old is he? What is he like? What is he thinking? Who's next to him? What's bothering him?
Emotional separation
Given Russian economic realities, grown children do not always move away from their parents. But emotional separation is not about freeing up living space. Researchers call it a decrease in dependence on the emotional states of a significant other (including parental approval or disapproval). Practical psychologists put it more simply - this is the ability to recognize one’s own feelings and states and the ability to say “no” without breaking off relationships. You can live in the same apartment with your parents and be emotionally independent in relation to them. To do this you need to grow up. An adult is able to accept responsibility for his feelings, thoughts and actions, has internal reasonable independence from the judgments of others, is able to distinguish reality from fiction and adapt quite flexibly to circumstances, and has self-criticism. In addition, an adult strives for spirituality, that is, harmonious relationships with the world, comprehension of the meaning of his life. And cultivates tolerance for the views and characteristics of other people. These are precisely the characteristics of a mature personality given by the prominent Russian developmental psychologist Evgeniy Ilyin.
Talk
Take a piece of paper and two pens of different colors, one with your left hand and the other with your right. If you are right-handed, your right hand will be your adult self and your left hand will be your child self. If you are left-handed, it will be the other way around.
Now the conversation is only between you and your inner child. Who speaks first? How does a conversation start? The answers may be unexpected and surprising.
At this time, when you have found your inner child and are talking to him, it is time to start a relationship. Talk as much as you want, ask if he needs anything, and give him what he asks for. Call him by his name (yours), say sweet and loving words, express your love and make suggestions. Like the parent you wish you had at that age.
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