Many people tend to believe that confidence and self-confidence are the same thing. Naturally, these concepts are very different. So what is the difference between self-confidence and confidence?
It's simple - the first has no real basis and is bravado, while the second is inherent in people who know their capabilities and understand their capabilities. Moreover, it is not far from self-confidence to arrogance, when a person is unable to correctly calculate his strength, which is why he can get into an unpleasant situation.
Confidence and self-confidence, what's the difference?
If you begin to delve more deeply into these concepts, you can figure out whether self-confidence differs from confidence and in what way.
It is quite easy to find out that a self-confident person is usually not confident in himself, he is completely confident in his own infallibility and believes that he is the one who is able to do everything correctly and without mistakes. In addition, various complexes are often hidden under self-confidence, additionally hiding them under aggressiveness, arrogance and selfishness. Usually, overconfidence is the result of poor upbringing, and the individual thus tries to hide his worst qualities, such as touchiness, passivity and anger. Articles on the topic
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A self-confident person seeks to dominate others by showing his strength and power. He often does not have proof of his words, but stubbornly continues to enter into an argument in order to prove his advantage.
Psychologists believe that self-confidence is a separate mind that knows everything better than anyone, understands everything and understands absolutely any subject.
What is the difference between confidence and self-confidence? It’s just that a confident person doesn’t look for all this. He does not try to prove to anyone that he is right, he clearly knows his capabilities and does not seek to prove anything to anyone, which is the main difference.
True confidence eliminates hypocrisy and arrogance.
A confident person is able to defend his opinion even in front of a large audience and is able to insist on his own. At the same time, he can adequately respond to incoming criticism or comments.
To understand the differences, a simple example can be given. A self-confident person can tell everyone he knows about what a good and interesting book he is going to write. However, he never does. A self-confident person will simply write and publish a book, after which he will tell his friends about it.
Overconfidence
Some people mistakenly believe that there are certain positive aspects to self-confidence. However. On the contrary, research in psychology proves the fact that in most cases the cause of failure is precisely the individual’s excessive self-confidence. It leads to the fact that forces and real prospects are viewed distortedly, from an idealized point of view, so that as a result, success is never achieved. Overly self-confident people do not admit mistakes, and when faced with failures, they attribute them to some external circumstances. They consider their own opinion to be the only correct one, while more often than others they are prone to conflicts, as a result of which there is complete misunderstanding in their relationships.
Psychologists most often talk about self-confidence in a negative way. It can cause failure in many areas of life, since, as it develops, it prevents the individual from perceiving the real relationship between problems and internal forces, disrupts the adequacy of thinking, and affects self-esteem. Of course, such a scenario cannot be ruled out when such a belief is beneficial, but this is too dangerous an extreme. In addition, it has a negative impact on personality development. Self-confident people do not take mistakes personally, therefore, they are not able to analyze them, accept them as experience and not make them again in the future. For them, mistakes are something too natural, the result of exclusively external conditions and combinations of circumstances, a failure.
In some cases, self-confidence poses a real threat to the individual. In particular, when problems relate to financial issues or health. We are talking about self-medication, which rarely leads to a truly positive outcome.
The distinctive feature of self-confidence is that it does not have any basis. Self-confidence is based on an objective assessment of capabilities and potential, which are supported by past successful experience.
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What is the difference between self-confidence and confidence, we learn to recognize
Overly self-confident people are characterized by:
- refusal to correct errors, or even notice them;
- self-confidence;
- an arrogant attitude towards others and regularly reminding them of what a person is better at than them;
- thoughtless actions (first do, then think).
It is worth understanding that sometimes self-confidence can be a plus. As a rule, such behavior is necessary for bosses. By doing this, they keep their subordinates in their hands, not allowing them to challenge their authority. Moreover, self-confidence allows you not to doubt your abilities. It also helps not to stop there, continuing to improve. People who suffer from low self-esteem are not able to lead such a full life.
Self-confidence is based on self-love, whereas the source of confidence is self-respect. Therefore, the latter are given preference when hiring, for example.
What is the difference between confidence and self-confidence - psychology
Until recently, I myself believed that the concepts of confidence and self-confidence were one and the same. And many people think so too. But a couple of years ago I learned and realized that there is a huge gap between these concepts, despite the similar name and even some similarities.
Let's figure out what the difference is
So, let's start with self-confidence. This quality is characteristic of charming, developed and independent individuals. Or rather, they have it quite well developed. And also, to some extent, most people have it. For some, this quality is more developed, for others, it is weaker.
- What is self-confidence?
There is such a thing as a comfort zone. The larger your comfort zone, the more confident you are.
- What is a comfort zone?
These are the circumstances and situations in which we know what to do and how best to do it.
For example, you have a favorite cafe, you have been there many times, you may already know some of the staff, you know the menu, you know where the toilet is, etc. In short, you know how everything works in this place. This cafe is in your comfort zone and makes you feel confident.
And another situation. You have come to a new cafe that you have never been to before. Here you will most likely feel insecure, because you don’t know how everything works here. But when you figure it out, you will expand your comfort zone.
The same applies to all areas of our lives. We feel more confident the more we know and the larger our comfort zone.
Therefore, the more often we expand our comfort zone, the faster we become a confident person.
The most important area in which you need to develop and thereby increase your comfort zone is the area of communication with people, or in another way it can be called sociability.
What prevents us from becoming sociable are fears and modesty, which, in fact, is also a set of fears. Fears that everyone around us is hostile, that we will receive a refusal in response and because of this we will be upset, fear of being offended, etc.
There are fewer fools than people think: people simply do not understand each other.
© Luc de Vauvenargues
What should be done?
We need to get rid of these fears! And the better we get rid of them, the better and faster we will be able to expand our comfort zone and become more self-confident. Because if we can quickly find a common language with strangers, then we can quickly expand our comfort zone.
I highly recommend that you direct your efforts in this direction. Communication skills open many doors!
A real man must be confident in himself! To do this, he must overcome his fears and destroy unnecessary barriers, be smart and knowledgeable, be independent and charming, be physically and mentally strong. Must be able to find a way out of any situation.
A real man should always know what to do! Even when he doesn’t know!
© Maxim Aludin
We recommend reading - How to get rid of self-doubt - effective tips
What is self-confidence
And it’s no coincidence that we do this after a paragraph about real men. You will ask why? Here's why:
- Most women want to see a confident man next to them.
And it is no coincidence, because a woman is by nature physically less strong and needs protection, as well as the protection of her children. In addition, it is more difficult for a woman to make a choice; emotions get in the way.
And, since many people do not see the difference between self-confidence and self-confidence, women mistakenly believe that self-confident men can give them what they need.
In practice, self-confident people do have some self-confidence, but they are so sure that they are right that they crush with their stubbornness and do not take into account the opinions of other people. They are not capable of dialogue and consider only their opinion to be the only correct one.
The desire to always be right is a sign of vulgarity.
© Albert Camus
Accordingly, women who decide to throw in their lot with a self-confident man will probably be able to feel “like behind a stone wall,” but be prepared that behind this wall you will not have a gate and there will be no freedom.
And if you are lucky and get a confident man, then you will feel supported and supported, but at the same time you will still have your freedom.
But such men, unfortunately, are in the minority. And to increase your chances of meeting him, you need to develop and become better and more harmonious yourself.
A self-confident person does not need his half, he is already whole. And he is more interested in whole people.
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How to deal with a self-confident person
Everyone has probably met a self-confident and extremely arrogant person. Usually he immediately goes into conflict at the slightest opportunity.
To get out of a conflict, just follow these rules:
- There is no need to respond to rudeness with rudeness.
- It is enough to simply ignore the interlocutor and the conflict itself will disappear.
- It is important not to show your reaction to provocations. Responses to offensive phrases should be as neutral as possible.
- You should not take everything your opponent says as the truth.
For such people, such ostentatious self-confidence acts as a protective shell. Thanks to her, they are in contact with the outside world.