Adviсe
- Features of rivalry
- Neurotic rivalry
- What is competition? Its varieties
- The meaning of competition
The term “competition” comes to us from Latin. This word means “moving forward together.” But in current usage in society, competition refers to economic competition, struggle, rivalry. Only one person wins, even if all opponents are good. In a post-industrial society, the main goals are determined by people. The main goal is to increase profits. In addition, the synonymous concepts of competition sound quite harsh: money, status and power. Competition is based on these laws.
Rivalry, in turn, is a relationship between individuals, which is characterized by a struggle (hidden or open) for authority, love, money, fame, and self-realization.
Features of rivalry
From the position of psychoanalysis, the features of rivalry are considered as the main element of psychosexual development of the individual, which affects character. This is expressed at an early age. First, as a struggle for parental love against the backdrop of relationships with other children in the family.
According to Sigmund Freud, the Oedipus complex is the root cause of the conflict that arose due to childhood jealousy towards a parent of the same sex. The results appear in adulthood. If this complex caused a powerful feeling of rivalry in the mother in her childhood, then in the future it takes on sharp forms. They affect her actions and cause this feeling in her daughter since childhood. Maternal rivalry manifests itself in an attempt to intimidate her daughter, humiliate her, prohibit communication with men, etc.
Freud agreed with the presence of rivalry in the life of the individual. Rivalry is often noticed in a family with several children. He believed that only after overcoming such a feeling is it possible for positive emotions to emerge.
Rivalry is normal. It activates human strength, helps to develop personality, to improve. It is present in every relationship and area of human life. Along with this, competition gains such manifestations and strength that it can become pathological, which leads to the formation of various contradictions and neuroticism.
Competition between species
As with the relationships between individuals of the same population, interspecific competition (examples were given above) can be asymmetrical and symmetrical. At the same time, asymmetric competition occurs more often. This is due to the fact that identical environmental conditions favorable for rival species are extremely rare.
Fluctuating resources usually occur in nature. Therefore, different competing species take turns gaining advantages. This leads to the development of coexistence of species and their improvement. They alternately find themselves in more or less favorable conditions. In addition, the size of the population influences the outcome of competition. The higher it is, the higher the chances of winning.
Neurotic rivalry
The issue of neurotic rivalry has become an object of study for psychoanalysts. The works of K. Horney show that in Western culture this rivalry has the following differences from the usual:
the neurotic tirelessly compares himself with others, even when this is not necessary; ambition is not satisfied by achieving more than others or by success. It involves the desire to become unique; hidden aggression is demonstrated in the neurotic’s attitudes that no one should become better, luckier or more beautiful.
From this position, with a neurotic form of personal rivalry, it is not the essence of actions that is important, but the impression achieved thanks to them. With adequate personal rivalry, comparative success is sufficient, but with neurotic personality, the goal is to obtain absolute superiority.
If success does not live up to the expectations of an ambitious person, then it causes a feeling of disappointment. In the neurotic form, the destructive element prevails over the creative, because of this, it is more important for the neurotic to see other individuals defeated, rather than achieve their own success.
Horney also shows that the desire to win or to interfere with others is often noticeable in patients with a neurotic form of competition. Such individuals fear the success of the analyst. They do everything to thwart efforts, even when it harms themselves. They mislead psychoanalysts, hide information, but also try to stay in this state longer or show deterioration. Such a person will not report improvement, and if he does, he will attribute it to external factors.
A distinctive feature of this rivalry is that, while remaining destructive, it becomes the cause of high anxiety, which leads to its rejection. The neurotic acts simultaneously in two incompatible directions: he is guided by an aggressive desire to dominate, but at the same time he wants to remain a favorite of the public.
The reason for being afraid of yourself is the fear of losing love. Neurotics maintain rivalry because the desires of the superego create an obstacle to aggression, but because they are trapped between the desire for universal love and the thirst for superiority. This becomes the central conflict of personality.
In the course of studying the phenomenon of rivalry, the psychoanalyst comes to the conclusion that rivalry is becoming a problem for everyone in the West, it manifests itself in the form of a central conflict among neurotics. In struggle and competition, even adequate people tend to show destructive tendencies, which are individually important for a neurotic. The desire for individualistic competition that prevails in society becomes the cause of disruptions in relationships between individuals in different spheres of life, including relationships between a man and a woman. Because of the destructive nature of neurotic rivalry, it has more destructive consequences than simple competition.
Research methods
In modern economic science, two methods of studying competition are used: institutional and neoliberal. Institutional theory takes into account economic, social, political, organizational, socio-psychological factors and features of a particular system.
Competition is a kind of incentive, a stimulus for development. Achieving high results in the economic sphere is only possible if there is competition. One can cite quite a lot of facts confirming this theory from world history.
What is competition? Its varieties
Competition is an extremely popular phenomenon in today's world. It permeates all layers of society, as well as all spheres of life. Education, entrepreneurship, art - it is difficult to find an area that excludes competition and the struggle for primacy.
But why is competition needed? She makes our world move forward. This is the main factor of progress and evolution. Competition drives innovation and controls global markets. Thanks to this, we have our livelihood.
The main benefit of competition is not winning, but increasing efficiency. It releases hidden “reserves” and helps to make great efforts. Participants in such a struggle will find new strength in themselves, they will get a “second wind.” With an adequate approach, this happens even in a situation where it is impossible to win. It forces us to improve ourselves.
As for species-specific competition, biologists highlight competition among individuals within a species, as well as among representatives of different species due to the limited amount of resources in the world - water, food, shelters, etc.
In the economic sphere, there is business competition among entrepreneurs; each of them, through his own actions, limits the ability of rivals to unilaterally influence market conditions and the turnover of goods. This refers to the level of dependence of the market on the behavior of its participants.
In everyday life, there is competition in relationships of all ages. Children compete with each other no less than adults.
Rivalry in nature
Competition in nature can be intraspecific and interspecific. The type of communication when interacting populations experience negative effects from each other (or from one of them) is called antibiosis. It is divided into parasitism, predation, competition and amensalism.
Intraspecific competition is the competition between individuals of the same species for the same resources. Thus, self-regulation of a population is influenced by intraspecific competition. Examples of such competition: the nesting site of birds of the same species, competition between male deer and other mammals for the right to a female during the breeding season.
Interspecific competition is also characterized by competition for resources. But it happens between different species of individuals. Such competition (examples: fox and wolf hunting a hare) is very numerous. Predators compete for food. They rarely come into direct confrontation. As a rule, the failure of one turns into success for the other.
The meaning of competition
Is competition beneficial? Is it positive or negative? Do people need it? Why does the West consider competition useful, but Eastern teachings do the opposite? The thing is that they are addressed to different personalities, or try to create people of different types. To understand the meaning of competition, there are 4 types of individual’s attitude toward it in the process of increasing self-esteem and self-confidence:
The individual does not like competition and fears it due to low self-esteem. Competition forces the individual to act, but she has a negative attitude towards rivals because she is afraid of failures that will affect the assessment of the individual. A person considers competition a good thing and values his rivals because they force him to work and act. Achieving success and personal development does not require motivation through competition. She has enough internal needs to move up according to the established plan.
It turns out that with low self-esteem, competition does not become motivation, but rather the opposite. But if it is overestimated, it is not required for the formation of motives. This is important to consider if you are busy raising or improving yourself. As long as an individual has low self-esteem, he does not need competition; it can cause harm. At this stage, it is important to be able to believe in yourself, because comparisons in any form can be harmful. You need to celebrate your own successes, compare them with your other achievements, and praise them.
The second stage comes when competition arises too early, the person was not ready for it. It is worth continuing to work on assessing your own personality, growing and developing, then there is a chance to reach the third level.
At this stage, cooperation is not an obstacle to competition, because when a person helps competitors rise, he creates new levels of achievement for himself, which brings pleasure when conquering new heights.
At the last stage, the person goes up, not looking at others and not evaluating them. Some may be higher, some further, but comparisons are no longer required to continue on the path to achieve goals.
Other examples of competition
Is it competition between plants for light, for soil resources, for pollinators? Absolutely yes. Plant communities form on soils rich in minerals and moisture. They are thick and closed. Therefore, light for them is limited. They have to compete for it. Pollinating insects also choose a more attractive plant.
The animal world also has its own examples of competition. Is the struggle of herbivores for phytomass competition? Of course yes. Surprisingly, large-ungulates can compete with insects such as locusts and mouse-like rodents, which are capable of destroying most of the grass when they reproduce en masse. Predators compete for prey, and competition for food develops into a struggle for space. This is because food availability depends not only on ecology, but also on area.
Three and a half factors for winning over competitors
How to retain your customers and not lose revenue? The main thing is that you cannot engage in sabotage in relation to another point . Vandalism towards a competitor, spreading bad rumors and writing negative reviews is, firstly, unprofessional, secondly, it shows that you have nothing to answer in a fair fight and thirdly, it can lead to a kind of “war” with senseless expenses at both sides. What to do then?
High-quality and tasty coffee is easy.
Making delicious coffee is not difficult, but more and more coffee shops are neglecting quality for the sake of cost and simple laziness, but in vain. Many coffee lovers have become sophisticated in taste and can easily distinguish cheap Robusta from high-quality Arabica.
Simple steps to make the best coffee.
- Spend enough time on barista training.
- Buy quality beans – 100% freshly roasted Arabica beans.
- Know how to prepare coffee correctly - check the espresso settings with your coffee bean supplier.
- Buy quality milk and cream.
- Know how to properly clean coffee equipment.
- Love your coffee.
A service that makes going to a coffee shop enjoyable
Customers love the coffee shop not only for the coffee. A polite, neat and knowledgeable barista is very important for the visitor. A beautiful design on coffee will leave a pleasant impression. A recent article described how difficult it is to find a good barista and how to supervise his work. Competitors will also face this problem and will often change employees. If you manage to find real professionals, this will be a big step forward.
In addition to the staff, it is worth paying attention to the attractiveness and design of the island itself . After the coronavirus epidemic, many visitors have become very demanding about cleanliness and measures to protect against infection . Everything should indicate that it is completely safe to buy coffee from you.
A price that matches your product
Many customers compare the prices of drinks in different coffee shops. More attractive prices need to be maintained. This does not mean that coffee should be cheaper. For example, if you prepare raf with pure cream, and your competitor has a liquid drink, like an Americano with milk, you can have a higher price. The main thing is an adequate price-quality ratio of the product .
The ability to be different is a confident leap forward
What will help secure superiority? The reputation created by the three previous factors must be supported by special “tricks” and interesting solutions . Introduce interesting and unusual drinks! Think of something to surprise your buyer! The coffee shop should be such that it cannot be confused with any other.
Imperfect market
Imperfect competition is a market where at least one sign of perfect competition is not observed. This type of competition presupposes the presence of two or more sellers who have the ability to influence pricing in one way or another. They are the main competitors. In an imperfect market, either sellers or buyers take into account their ability to influence price.
The following types of imperfect competition are distinguished:
- monopolistic competition (there are numerous examples, such as the mobile communications market);
- oligopoly;
- monopoly.
Monopolistic competition is the leading form in modern business. With it, quite a lot of entities offer one special product, informational, service or other nature. They are both monopolists and competitors, while possessing real levers of price control for their special products.
Oligopoly refers to an industrial market. Such an example of economic competition where oligopoly occurs can be found in the field of oil and gas production and refining. This competition is characterized by the presence of several largest companies that control a significant part of production and sales of products. At the same time, these companies seriously compete with each other. Each of them has an independent market policy, which nevertheless depends on competitors. They are forced to reckon with each other. In such a market, a product can be either differentiated or standard. There are significant barriers to entry in this industry.
Monopoly is also a type of industry market. A monopolist is one of a kind. It cannot be replaced, not even approximately. He controls the price and volume of production. As a rule, he receives excess profits. A monopoly can be created artificially: exclusive rights, patents, copyrights, ownership of the most important sources of raw materials. It is almost impossible to enter such an industry. The barriers are too high.
Competition for women
Women shortage
It is not customary to talk about the lack of women in Russia. There will immediately be a huge number of disagreements, both women and men, who claim that a man is always in demand, and the bitter fate of leading a weak-willed bull into a stall, while fighting off other comers, fell exclusively to women. You can often hear about competition for a man, about rivals, and advice on how to keep a man in a couple. And very rarely timid snowdrops of male indignation appear about competition for women, about the lack of women, about difficulties in finding women. Men are ashamed to admit this, they should be the kings of the situation, the situation should depend only on themselves. Many men talk about the inconsistency of those complaining, that there are no problems with women, they often refuse to believe even the numbers presented point-blank, preferring to live in a world of myths. Most men simply never think about anything. But there is a problem, and just because someone doesn’t recognize it, it won’t cease to exist, it needs to be talked about. And first we need to understand how and why there is a shortage of brides on the marriage market (the marriage market is all women and men who are looking for a mate in one way or another).
At the time of 2010, there were 11.5 million more women in Russia than men. Many people do not know anything more than this figure about the sex ratio, and the same many do not know it either. What kind of shortage of women are we talking about?
But if you break down these millions by age group, it turns out that all the “extra women” appear only after about forty years. Initially, after puberty, both boys and girls go out into society in search of a personal life. At this start, for every 100 girls there are approximately 105 guys, which is not so scary, and if you combine everyone into pairs, then only every 20th guy will remain single. Around the age of 30, the ratio levels out, and then a shortage of men begins due to their high mortality rate. There is still no talk of any shortage of women. At this point, the overall picture of the sex ratio by age group looks like this:
There is no need to complicate something that already works great. But the laws of the marriage market do not work only based on the quantitative ratio of men and women in the population. We see a huge number of inconsistencies between the observed phenomena and the graph presented above. Therefore, in order to get to the bottom of the truth, everything will have to be complicated further. And then girls begin to create couples with older men, thereby leaving the marriage market, where competition for them then increases accordingly. At the same time, guys do not want to create couples with older women, and women themselves are not eager to take young guys as life partners, so the latter remain in search of girls their own age. This trend, when women equal in age to men are in pairs with older men, continues until approximately the age of 32 for participants in the marriage market. Couples of unequal age are one of the main reasons for increased competition for women of fertile age. The graph of the women’s shortage at this stage takes on new shapes and begins to look a little closer to reality:
This graph used figures that showed official marriages and also included couples who declared they were “common law.” But the trend of pairing people unequal in age continues in “unofficial” relationships, and accordingly the graph should be even more skewed towards the shortage of women, and the point of conditional equilibrium is even more shifted towards increasing the age of participants in the marriage market.
This is not the final stage, but further you will have to go by touch, without numbers. The most important component of competition for women is male hyperactivity in matters of love and sex. It consists of active attempts to win the attention and sympathy of all more or less attractive girls and women that men meet along the way. I think everyone has observed this in their lives: men try to get acquainted, always and everywhere, regardless of any circumstances, regardless of age and marital status, women, single and married, young and old, everyone wants more and more women. This is perceived positively by society, and is perceived positively by women. Men teach each other how to get to know each other correctly, women encourage them to be active. But with such a bias towards male activity, this phenomenon is rather negative. It feeds female passivity, feeds female self-esteem, produces single mothers, fosters colossal competition for women, devalues men in the eyes of women, and destroys the culture of love.
Another not very rosy phenomenon for the marriage market is polygamy, and more specifically, polygamy. And now we are not talking about Arab harems. In modern conditions, polygamy is when one man has several women faithful to him, for example, a wife and a mistress, several girls in love with a guy, etc. Women are much more likely to gather around rich, handsome or charismatic men in small harems, while remaining faithful to them and ceasing active searches for your own life partner. Only women talk about polygamy as a negative phenomenon; they talk about how good it is for men and how unfair polygamy is for women. Few men think about polygamy as something negative. Everyone thinks that many women at the same time is great, but for some reason no one thinks, where can we get these wives for everyone at once? The topic is only folklore: “If you don’t have a girlfriend, then someone has two.” Polygamy among men and the tendency of women toward polygyny take women away from the marriage market, increasing competition for those who remain and leaving many guys alone in love. And here we probably need to make a retreat and pay tribute to women: with their opportunities in the modern marriage market, they could easily have several dozen lovers, but they basically continue to want one and only beloved. If we theoretically add male hyperactivity and polygamy to the general picture of demand and compare all this with phenomena observed in society, then we can roughly build a final schedule of competition in the marriage market. It will look like this:
The graph shows a picture that one encounters in real life. Age-unequal marriages, male hyperactivity, polygamy, as well as the decline in marital activity after a certain age are taken into account. The schedule is tentative.
Now about a phenomenon that apparently does not particularly affect the general situation. We are talking about a seemingly huge number of men who do not participate in the race for women's attention. These are alcohol and drug addicts, the mentally ill, prisoners undergoing compulsory military service, antisocial and other citizens who seem to have no time for love at all. And mostly these are all men. Many (especially women) consider this a scourge of Russian society, they think that a huge number of men are in no way suitable for love relationships. But it turns out that this is not so. The marginalized have their own marginal women, the prisoners have wives or pen pals, the soldiers have girls waiting for them. Firstly, there are not so many such men out of the total population and not so much more than such women. Secondly, on the marriage market, such men often take one statistical woman from the same habitat, or even several at once. Thirdly, there is a completely tangible female response in the form of women dropping out of love relationships. These are mainly prostitutes and sexually cold (frigid) women.
Competition for love
Competition in the economy is theoretically an extremely positive phenomenon. Theoretically, competition should also be a good thing in the marriage market: men should become better and strive for perfection in order to please women in conditions of their scarcity. In practice, everything is bad. I think that the majority are still perplexed why it is necessary to count men and women, their activity, some kind of theoretical competition and tension. After all, there are still free women, and affairs with married women are a common thing for society, go and take what you need or it’s your own fault. Many people do not realize that the phenomena they observe are due to the lack of women on the marriage market and due to male overactivity; they think that completely snickering women who are influenced by “Western propaganda of consumerism” are to blame. Therefore, it is further worth considering what phenomena result in such a large amount of attention to women, and how competition for love generally manifests itself.
Let’s imagine that initially there are equal numbers of men and women, they are all free and begin to look for a mate. The best ones are the first to leave this picture: men and women who know how to love and do not have significant mental problems of interaction with the opposite sex. At the same time, we have two noticeable trends: firstly, women leave with older men, and secondly, several women sometimes gather around the same man. Perhaps now many will be surprised, but the number of women is not infinite, they do not appear out of thin air, and therefore they are gradually ending in our picture. There remain young boys and young girls (under 35 years old), while there are significantly more guys. The average age (from 35 to 45 years) is balanced, there are approximately equal numbers of free people. After 45, there are more free women. This is a snapshot of the marriage market at any given time.
And here it is worth stopping to understand a very important point. Almost always, when someone forms an opinion about men or women, about their needs and requirements for a partner, or paints a general portrait, the person takes into account only participants in the marriage market. And here you need to understand that people looking for a mate most likely have some problems with their search. Among women, most often it is commercialism, narcissism, passivity, inability to love a man, and emotional dullness. This does not mean that everyone is like this, it means that only such people remain. This is a very common misconception, men start saying that all women
corrupt and greedy, drawing their conclusions solely on visitors to dating sites, while most women are in strong relationships and do not have any special problems forcing them to resort to dating on the Internet.
That is, all beautiful, smart and good women are sorted out first. This is a very important digression and the first point of competition for women: the worst remain
. Men's overactivity only fuels their vices: the passive ones want to be interested in a specific man less and less, when there are so many men around, the mercantile ones only picture in their imagination additional zeros of the earnings required for a man, seeing crowds of gentlemen knocking on their doorsteps.
Many young people can observe a strange phenomenon at first glance, when all the interesting, pretty, and most importantly open and sympathetic girls and women are already in relationships and firmly occupied with family life. It seems like a lot of bad luck or even a curse. But there is absolutely nothing surprising about this. Girls in couples, in principle, know how to sympathize and love, so they are naturally busy. And free people sympathize less often, because they simply don’t know how, so they remain free. This is another manifestation of competition for women, which follows from the first point: everyone who is suitable is already in a relationship
. It is difficult to imagine that with such demand, a girl will remain alone for a long time without any problems. Also, often a young guy can meet sympathetic women of older ages, with zero demand for himself from his peers. At the same time, he gets the impression that all the young people are simply too stupid, but no, all the young people are simply too busy and in demand.
The average woman more often has a whole complex of “alternate airfields”; it is much easier for her to find support in the form of a strong male shoulder; if she has any discord in her family relationships, she has much more opportunities for betrayal. All this is also competition for a woman.
Competition itself manifests itself in a rather unconventional way. Any woman cannot choose from all single men at once, but can only choose from those with whom she communicates and who show signs of attention to her. In addition, she cannot choose several men at once, because, firstly, the men themselves will be unhappy, and secondly, in most cases, women also do not like having many men at the same time. As a result, pairs most often form according to the principle of “who sat down on the chair faster,” as in that children’s game when there are fewer chairs placed than children running around them, and after the music ends, the one who is simply unlucky will be left standing. In this case, there is competition, but there is practically no competition. Therefore, you can often find a bad guy with a cool girl and a cool guy alone. What do girls see in these? Nothing, the first one just got a pair randomly, but the second one didn’t get it randomly. This is a manifestation of competition for a particular guy, which he can see and feel: there are very great difficulties in finding a suitable girl who is not in a relationship, and even the last available girl, who is not really liked, is still taken under crown right from under your nose.
Maybe something is wrong and something is not taken into account? After all, “ Everything around me is not like that at all.”
! This can often be heard; many cannot see beyond their own nose and are convinced that the situation at their work is a reflection of the situation in society as a whole. This is not true, and what someone has in their environment does not matter. You only need to look at demand and complaints. Among young guys, we see a demand for almost any girl, a large number of forced singles who have never been in a relationship, but looking for a soul mate, we also see a lot of hatred towards girls and a lot of inability to interact with them, anger towards more successful guys. We see complaints about strangers, about their behavior, about their loneliness and uselessness, about their inability to please girls. There is no demand for guys from girls, for example, on dating sites no one writes or responds to them; in any other corners of the Internet the situation will be the same. Young girls have other problems and complaints, they have a small demand for those who are smart and know how to love, there is a demand for the rich. Almost none of them complain about forced loneliness; there are enough problems with relationships with an existing boyfriend or problems with choosing from several guys. There are complaints about your mental state, dissatisfaction with yourself and your body, and the inability to love anyone, about the fact that no one likes you. There is not a lot of hatred towards boys and men. The demand for girls is huge and widespread, on dating sites there are hundreds of messages from guys and men, in other corners of the Internet there are round dances of men and there is a lot of desire to communicate and help on their part. That is, guys and girls have completely different problems in their personal lives, and a rather big problem for the stronger half is lack of demand; the weaker half is not familiar with this problem.
Aleny round dance
Alen (begins with the letter A, so as not to be confused with the animal deer) is a modern term, formed on the Internet, meaning a weak-willed man who follows women’s whims, deifies women, acts to please women’s interests and justifies all their misdeeds. He tries to win a woman’s favor by completely indulging her whims. The term is derogatory. The closest (but still distant) synonym in meaning is: henpecked.
You can often see the phenomenon when several men show attention to the same woman at once. At the same time, such men are clearly counting on more than friendly relations with this woman. They give gifts, provide assistance, are ready to listen and support. Most often, on their part, such actions are aimed at the possibility of receiving love from a woman. Such men, of course, do not receive any sympathy, but they still cannot comprehend the wrongness of their behavior. As a result, a situation is created where a woman perceives several men as acquaintances or friends and continues to maintain contact with them, and these men, in turn, perceive their relationship with this woman as courting her. Often in such a situation, a woman already has a beloved man or even a husband, which does not stop Alena’s attempts to win women’s favor. This phenomenon is called the scarlet round dance.
, when Aleni endlessly spin around and around, but never get what they want. The definition is modern, shows disrespect for the actions of the alens and shows their stupidity. I don’t know any analogues in classical Russian.
Aleni most likely suffers from the uselessness of his actions, but not immediately. At first, they may even get satisfaction from hope and excitement, but then, after many unsuccessful attempts, they become imbued with the ideas of simple and understandable misogyny. Many, due to their general intellectual abilities, do not analyze the situation in any way and do not draw any conclusions at all, continuing to dance in circles until their hooves wear out.
Many attribute someone’s lofty design to absolutely spontaneous phenomena. Many guys think that a woman deliberately allows Alena to dance around her, thereby amusing her vanity. Such thoughts are already breaking out of the bunker of misogyny as another reason to blame women for the lack of water in the tap. Alena's round dance is a natural phenomenon when men, without any understanding of women, driven by sexual desire, try to achieve women's favor by voluntarily and without coercion providing all kinds of services. The woman, in turn, sees several Alenas showing her signs of attention and accepts them without any second thoughts about their possible suffering, often simply because of friendliness and inability to give up. Let's turn the situation around: would many men refuse a group of women making friends, rushing to give gifts, treat them to wine and not asking for anything in return? The only problem is that the situation does not unfold, and no one becomes friends with men with illusory hopes. So if we are to look for the guilty, then they will turn out to be men with their hyperactivity.
Competition for women on the Internet
Women on the Internet are perhaps the best illustration of competition and an unhealthy imbalance in the ratio and activity. Marketing research shows that now both men and women use the Internet in almost equal quantitative proportions; there are approximately equal numbers of them. But by and large, women have their own special Internet. They are on social networks, on websites and forums for mothers, on websites of online clothing and cosmetics stores, on psychological forums and websites dedicated to relationships, family and marriage. There are practically no women in the usual habitats for men on the Internet. I think everyone has observed round dances around a female person on some forum, in an online game, on a technical site or in online chats. But what looks most interesting are sites, groups and dating services, as places specially designated for searching for love and relationships.
Few people know that there are much more men on dating sites than women. But for some reason many want to argue with this... The reality is that on different dating sites and services, depending on the specific place, there will be 1.5-3 times more men than women. Why this happens is a separate question, but what this ratio results in is the most beautiful picture of competition for women. Women and men come to the site, register their profiles, and post photographs. Then men start writing messages to women. All men at once to all women, a lot and often. Male hyperactivity is very clearly visible here; men try to “cover” as many women’s profiles as possible with their attention, write the same type of messages to everyone whose photograph seems at least more or less attractive to them. At the same time, the overwhelming majority of men themselves end up on dating sites not because of a good, well-fed life, and, to put it mildly, they do not have very much ability to conquer women’s hearts. On the other end of the line there are women who also went looking for love on the Internet not because they are so good. And these women receive a huge amount of attention and options, dozens and even hundreds of messages a day from a wide variety of men with a wide variety of offers. As a result, we get the following situation. No matter how smart and interesting a man is, on a dating site, first of all, he will not receive a single letter from women on his profile, he will have to start dialogues himself, women will not even have the thought of going through men’s profiles and starting dialogues, because they there is no time, you need to sort through a bunch of letters from the overflowing gentlemen. Secondly, the overwhelming majority of women simply will not answer a man, many think that this is an insidious conspiracy of young ladies and the owners of the dating sites themselves, but let lovers of such theories first try to answer everyone themselves when there are hundreds of messages in the mailbox a day. Thirdly, a man will not receive any emotional response from women who deign to pay attention to him; messages from them will be the same, dry and uninteresting, because there can no longer be any interest in the five hundredth candidate, even if there was initially.
Women, in turn, from such an influx of attention to themselves, begin to feel the velvet throne instead of the usual chair. Commercialism and passivity receive very strong reinforcement: “If men still go in shoals, then I’m doing everything right, and you can even increase the demands.” Women begin to come up with whole lists of requirements for the applicant to attract their attention, come up with minimum amounts of earnings for potential suitors, and begin to laugh at men: how narrow-minded, identical, they think about only one thing, how easy it is to twist them around their finger. In conditions of competition for themselves, women can afford all this, the flow of offers will still not dry up. But here, in fairness, it is worth noting that men, if they had the same competition from women for them, would behave even more disgustingly
. Do you want to seek some kind of dialogue with such narcissistic women who believe that a man owes them everything and does not know how to give anything in return? At this stage, misogyny can very clearly knock on any man's door.
What to do to win?
If there are so many of these women, then why should men serenade?
Competition in the marriage market is a very ugly phenomenon. A man cannot find a suitable life partner and with each new attempt he loses more and more faith in himself and in humanity. Competition instills the wrong attitude towards women, when men begin to think that they need to run after women and actively pursue them. Women themselves do not like this behavior and do not bring any fruit, but if you do not behave this way, then no one will even notice the man. Male attention is of very low quality, the highest activity is shown by the most emotionally stupid men who are not liked by women. As a result, it is very difficult for women to filter out unsuitable options without losing faith in the stronger half of humanity. No one unites in pairs, no one wants to become better, everyone is angry with each other, competition has the completely opposite effect, not the theoretically expected one. Competition breeds dissatisfaction and hatred. On their basis, guys and men begin to unite in various “men’s movements,” taking root in their negative views of women in general. When a woman declares the minimum amount her chosen one should earn, naturally no one will then have the desire to meet her demands; they will only want to send such a lover of money to hell. This is a completely correct reaction, and it is unlikely that any other reaction could arise. Just like any woman, she will react negatively to specific requests regarding her appearance and/or her earnings/dowry. Competition for women, in turn, helps men meet only women they want to hate, and hides from their view those they want to love.
What to do in such conditions if everything is so bad? We must understand that it is simply impossible to fight this state of affairs. The existing competition for women of fertile age is a complex system that includes cultural, economic, biological, demographic, psychological and social factors. And first of all, of course, you don’t need to start hating women or try to give up attraction to them, in the hope that they will soon understand everything, begin to suffer and run to appreciate men. This will not happen, and the man will only freeze his ears to spite someone else’s grandmother, who will never even know about him.
But it's not that bad! The vast majority of men will never think about anything like this, but will stubbornly continue to storm women’s hearts with stupid compliments and imposing themselves. And if someone has reached this point in reading the material, then such a person already has a colossal advantage over this male majority. The best weapon is knowledge, even if you are fighting for your happiness. And the best way to combat competition for women is to understand the situation and use your knowledge to your maximum benefit. It would be best not to exchange your emotions on clearly unwinnable options for women; let someone else do this. It’s also good to understand and realize what you need and pay attention only to suitable women. Don't play by someone else's rules, don't lead useless round dances. The shortage of women is a big, but not fatal problem, and everyone has the power to change themselves and their lives in such a way as to never remember that there are not enough women for everyone.
