How to stop being afraid of public speaking: psychologists advise

Personal story of how I overcame my fear of speaking

It so happened that I was chosen for the position of internal coach in my absence (I was on vacation). According to the criterion of having the “necessary” psychological education. That is, without my desire and prior consent.

I was sent on a business trip for a 4-day training. In 4 days they taught us the basics of conducting trainings and trained us as trainers. Before this, I had no experience speaking in front of people. For some reason, no one remembered or taught how to cope with fear before performing.

The peculiarity was that it was a part-time position. A pilot project, so to speak. And I had to perform 2 times a month in front of managers. That is, the rest of the time, I worked one step lower on the career ladder. At times I had to train line managers, and even my immediate supervisor. Can you imagine the situation?

In 4 days we were given a lot of information, given 80 files on a flash drive and 2 months to prepare. Actually, no one asked whether you want it or not, whether you are afraid or not. This happens in huge corporations. Either agree or...

There was nothing to do besides my main job, in the evenings and on weekends I studied and read about how to perform. I didn’t think about fear until I had mastered all the materials I had received and, at the same time, books for speakers that I had ordered online.

The question of how to overcome fear of speaking arose within two weeks.

I want to summarize and describe the techniques that helped me overcome fear and anxiety. I will describe it on a timeline:

• Long before the event
• About a week (sometimes 3 days)
• 20 minutes before the performance
• When there are 5 minutes left before the speech
• During the first words

These recommendations are a distillation of my own experience as a speaker, coach and leader.

Reviews and comments

Practice, use different techniques so as not to worry and not be afraid of public speaking and remember: “A speech needs an exciting beginning and a convincing ending. The task of a good speaker is to bring these two things together as much as possible” (G. Chesterton).

You can discuss your experience and knowledge on the topic below.

We also recommend reading:

• Storytelling
• Closing a Speech: 9 Effective Techniques
• Black rhetoric. Part five. Directing a performance and dealing with fear
• Overcoming Fear
• Preparing for a Public Speaking
• Beginning of public speaking
• Secrets of charisma during public speaking (part 2)
• Using gestures in public speech
• Secrets of charisma during public speaking
• 8 Principles for Beginner Speakers
• How to win the hearts of your audience: a cheat sheet for successful public speaking

Key words:1Rhetoric

Recommendations on how to overcome the fear of public speaking (long before the event)

If you always feel embarrassed in front of a large number of people, but still understand that speaking skills will be useful, for example, in a professional career, then start preparing in advance. And then, it seems to me, every manager or leader, for example, should be able to convince with words. What kind of conviction is there if he is afraid to speak?

Let's assume you decide to fight this fear. Then start training at home right now. After all, one of the components of fear is uncertainty in one’s abilities.

Follow these recommendations point by point, increasing in complexity. After 3 months, you will understand that you can already say something in public, for example, a toast. And most importantly, you get a positive response. Because diction has improved, the pace of speech adjusts to the topic. Use emotions - make your speech more beautiful.

Over time, you will understand that you can complicate the task, since animal fear appears less and less often. So:

5 recommendations:

1. Read fairy tales aloud. Yes, exactly fairy tales. Since they are written in simple language and for training and gaining inner confidence, this is just the thing. Exactly out loud. Since only in this case articulation and diction are practiced.
2. Read economic news out loud. This unusual advice lies in the complexity of the text. Practice will give you freedom in any performance, and of course, a decrease in anxiety.
3. Retell any story to your friend or family member. If you’re really embarrassed, just talk into the recorder. But then - a voice recorder - this will be an intermediate stage. Then, nevertheless, you need to tell something to a living person. Get into the habit of telling something you read for 10 minutes. In addition to relieving tension in the head and body, a good habit of communication in the family is also acquired.
4. Make it more difficult for yourself: approach a stranger on the street and ask for directions to any route. This exercise removes the fear of communicating with strangers. Over time, you will understand that you can calmly survive even a refusal.
5. Do these practices without interruption for a single day, at least for 5 minutes.

Because the practice of “speaking”, communicating with strangers, has a lot in common with performances. The brain, and the body, gets used to these tasks and stops reacting violently with stress and wet palms when necessary to stand up and publicly express your opinion.

Practice and more practice will lead you to the fact that over time you will receive a positive response to your speeches. This means that the fear that squeezes your throat and shakes your knees will pass. And also use your imagination - draw yourself a picture of your success. For self-confidence, recite affirmations (there are many examples here).

After all, overcoming yourself is development, and after a while you will be looking for opportunities to perform somewhere to get your adrenaline and emotional charge. You can read how else you can start self-development here.

Be natural

On the Internet there are many rhetorical rules on how to speak, gesture, and behave in public. But dry behavior will never attract the viewer, even if you act according to rhetorical “canons”.

The main thing is to develop your own internal principle: the audience should get the maximum benefit from your speech and have a good time. Respect your audience and they will do the same to you.

If your voice trembles, your eye twitches, if you want to scratch your nose, it’s okay, our body is trying to calm and support us. Public speaking teacher Marina Koval advises to be calmer about your internal support.

- Don’t try to restrict your movements. The lighter you feel, the freer your gestures and behavior, and the less attention the audience pays to it. The public is only interested in your speech.

Marina Koval, professional speaker

After you have figured out the topic of your speech, learned to listen and trained yourself to constantly speak, you need to move directly to writing the text for the speech.

Lifehack for removing a clamp - 3 quick exercises (5 minutes before the start)

When there is less and less time left until the moment of entering the stage or podium, it begins to “sausage”.

Having many years of speaking practice and knowing how to overcome the fear of public speaking, I can say that the excitement does not go away, regardless of practice and numerous repetitions. It is always there, but it is quite possible to reduce the physical manifestation with the help of these simple exercises.

1. The exercise can be done right before the exit, when the audience has gathered, it’s your turn in 2 minutes. This can be done unnoticed by others.

This exercise is based on breathing. Take a deep breath - hold your breath - exhale slowly. You can do this on account. 5-5-5 or 7-7-7. Who has enough oxygen? The lungs are enriched with oxygen, and not only do emotions become balanced, but the head begins to think better and the brain is ready for active action. This leads to: a. to reduce the intensity of emotions, b. to a bright head.

1. The exercise is based on physical tension and relaxation. We have noticed that sometimes the tension before a performance reaches such a climax that a spasm seizes the throat, the knees begin to shake and the fingers involuntarily squeeze the handle to the white knuckles. This tension can be quickly relieved, literally in 30 seconds, by clenching your fingers into fists as much as possible, and then, with the same effort, unclench your fingers and spread them to the side. It would be nice to do this with your toes at the same time, at least try. 5 times this muscle tension is enough to remove the physical manifestations of fear before a performance.
2. Wash your face with cold water. Take a sip of water. After all, before a performance I always dry up with excitement. This helps balance the acid-base balance and moisten the vocal cords.

And now the time has come...

Focus on the audience

An expert in the field of public speaking, Marina Koval, considers the most common mistake of a beginner to be the problem of excessive concentration and tension. A novice speaker strives to make his speech so good and bright that he attaches too much importance to every word. This threatens to completely immerse you in your speech or presentation, that is, it interferes with interaction with the audience.

Another common mistake is the lack of eye contact between the speaker and the audience. If you don't look at your viewers, don't be surprised if they stop listening to you. And if you don’t pay enough attention to the people who are sitting further than the first rows, you will definitely get unexpected and tricky questions.

There are two options for making eye contact with the audience:

1. “Walk” your gaze over everyone in the room, but not too quickly: move your gaze slowly from person to person - this way you will inspire trust in each listener;
2. Mentally divide the audience and “contact” visually with each part. Don't move your gaze too quickly so that people think you're afraid or unsure of yourself.

How to prepare text for an urgent speech: 7 effective tips

• Remember your true goal: why you need to learn to speak masterfully. Focus on the main goal and do not forget it even when it is difficult and difficult for you.
• Create a plan, a “skeleton” of the future speech text. A lot depends on the introduction: you need to immediately intrigue the listeners. In the main part, include the question posed, arguments, and various opinions on the topic. End with a conclusion—try to leave some thoughts and questions for your listeners to think about further.
• To prevent the text of the speech from being too serious, add emotions, interesting questions, and jokes. Improvisation is not allowed if you want to perform really well, so all the nuances must be included in the plan for your future performance.
• A good way to get people interested is with examples from your personal life. So add them to your speech! No one has told listeners this before, and besides, such information is remembered many times better than strict facts.
• Play with intonation and overall emotional message - rehearse the text by reading it in different ways. Try to place logical accents and intriguing pauses for the accents you need.
• Don’t forget to include interactivity in your speech, that is, interaction with the audience: questions, jokes, intriguing pauses. Beginning speakers may address listeners at the wrong time, or may not use interactivity at all. Make your “entertainments” harmonious.
• Learn the text by heart. If you are still worried, try your speech on your friends: let them criticize you. Such a rehearsal will add self-confidence, and you will be able to see the first reaction to your performance

How to achieve a successful speech - 5 important rules for a speaker

• Set yourself up for luck. There is no need to worry and go over everything in your head. Believe in your success.
• If you can’t avoid anxiety, it’s better to immediately confess to the public - you will instantly feel relief and begin to speak more calmly.
• Avoid monotony: you should be interesting to listen to. Emphasize words with your voice, make intriguing pauses, joke. This way you will absolutely attract attention and establish contact with the public.
• There is no need to show off your acting skills . Excessive gestures will not only seem funny, but will also irritate the viewer. Also, don’t walk from corner to corner so that people don’t get tired of looking at you. Don't overact.
• Don't deviate from the plan: your speech is already written in advance. There is no need to tensely “go” from point to point, checking off “boxes” in your head, but you still need to confidently and calmly follow the plan. Such rigor is needed so that you do not forget to fulfill everything you have planned and do not lose your way during the performance.

What else can help a speaker overcome public fear?

Target

Knowing the purpose can overcome a speaker's anxiety and fear of speaking. Before the performance, determine the goal that you want to achieve. Very rarely is it “just a report.” Find meaning for yourself, even if it is regulated, and at first glance, useless participation.

Come up with a benefit, or what you teach to those sitting in the hall. This meaning is exactly what you need to relieve anxiety and fear of performing. Focus your efforts specifically on conveying the meaning to the public.

The head is like a vessel in which one thing fits, either fear with endless “what if,” or the disclosure of a topic. It’s just that if the topic is not interesting to you personally, then it will take much more effort to shift the fear to the side.

You may be interested in articles on the topic:

• How to find purpose in life
• Methods of dealing with fears

Mistakes in dealing with a phobia

Some publications write that you can imagine people sitting in the hall in their underwear. I wouldn't do that to overcome stage fright. In fact, the energy during the performance is very noticeable. What thoughts and mood does the speaker come out with? Even the first excitement is forgiven to a benevolent speaker. And then no one will remember about the involuntary hitches. And if a person comes up with a condescending pose and a look from top to bottom, expect trouble. The audience feels this very sensitively - it has been verified more than once (by observing other speakers).

I think the recommendations to drink a sedative before a performance are wrong. The level of fear may be decreasing. But there is also a slowdown. Where it is necessary to speak with strong enthusiasm, to interest the audience, to give in to emotions, it will come out sluggish and insipid. And as a result, it will not be possible to convey information to people.

Learn to listen to others

It is impossible to be a good fighter without knowing how to defend yourself - the same is true in oratory. Without knowing, as others say, it is unlikely that you will be able to broadcast to the whole world and attract the proper attention. Listen to the radio, watch videos on the Internet. Study any source where people speak really well. Make it a habit to listen to “pros”: get inspired and note things that are useful to you. Get ideas, pay attention to little things and shortcomings, think about how you would say this or that phrase.

Symptoms of a phobia

Fear of crowds - what is this phobia called and how does it manifest itself?

The causes of phobic disorders are different and are accompanied by certain symptoms. While waiting to go on stage, emotional tension increases and the functioning of internal organs changes. Due to the release of large amounts of adrenaline, the following symptoms appear:

• muscles tense;
• Gestures and facial expressions change;
• hands and feet become cold;
• the timbre of the voice changes;
• speech becomes incoherent;
• discomfort in the heart area;
• The heart rate may increase, sweating may occur, and blood pressure may increase;
• headache;
• involuntary urination.

Symptoms of a phobia

People with increased nervous excitability may experience dizziness, accompanied by weakness and nausea, which will lead to fainting. The manifestation of the listed symptoms, their strength and quantity depend on the condition and characteristics of the body at that moment.

Additional Information. Panic stage fright can provoke the development of a speech disorder - logoneurosis (stuttering). Only timely comprehensive treatment will relieve serious problems.

The secret to a successful performance is serious preparation

Only by repeating your speech many times can you achieve fluency and be able to feel more or less confident on stage. Your goal is not perfection, you just need to be confident in the material.

By rehearsing, you identify your own shortcomings and can eliminate weak points in your performance in time. If something confuses you during rehearsal or an idea escapes you, it’s time to ask yourself whether you should change something in the speech - for example, remove a slide, add another one, or better expand on an idea.

Is it possible to learn not to be afraid?

Fear of people and society - what is this phobia called and what is it

A person suffering from glossophobia must understand that he is not the only one with such a disease. More than 90% of people in the world experience stage fright, and almost everyone is nervous.

You can get rid of the fear of public speaking on your own using possible methods of resolving the problem. They include four stages:

• recognition of the problem;
• identification and analysis of causes;
• consideration of solutions;
• application in practice.

Stage fright is often accompanied by severe stress and the development of various mental disorders. Experienced specialists tell us how not to be afraid to speak in public. For this purpose, various modern psychological techniques, trainings, and master classes are offered.