Fear of the future - how to overcome it, how to live without fear for the future?

Man proposes, but God disposes. Any plans made by a person, for one reason or another, can turn into failure. Everyone in their imagination tries to write the script of their destiny.

Futurophobia - fear of the future

It is impossible to foresee everything in advance; there are always unaccounted factors that can ruin all plans in an instant. Many, having suffered a fiasco, fall into black melancholy and give up. Because of the fear of another failure and the inability to change anything, they bury their heads in the sand, being in a state of anxiety and confusion. Fear of the future occupies a strong position in the human mind.

Futurophobia - what is it?

What is futurophobia? This is an irrational fear of upcoming events, fear of the future. Fear of the future in relationships, work, life. More often, anxiety is activated under the influence of important, positive events, for example, before changing jobs, moving, or the birth of a child. Even if everything goes well, and the changes can be called long-awaited, a person is overcome by the fear of not being able to cope with possible difficulties. The patient is aware of the irrationality of fear, but cannot cope with it. Attempts to ignore anxiety lead to its intensification.

It is important! Fear of the future is a signal of internal disharmony of the individual. It is necessary to understand what problem fear indicates.

Manifestations of Fear

A person is afraid of feeling helpless. Futurophobe is afraid of losing security, afraid of change. To reduce anxiety and get rid of the fear of the unknown, people come up with rituals, signs, traditions, and habits. But even at this, the futurophobe is afraid to live; he prefers to go with the flow and lead a passive lifestyle. However, this does not eliminate fear, because even a passive person has a future that is not fully known to him. In addition to psychological symptoms, psychosomatic health deteriorations are observed.

It is important! Futurophobia is associated with the fear of death and the fear of the unknown and change.

Signs of being afraid to live

Signs that you are afraid to live:

"Groundhog Day";
boring, joyless existence;
absence of any events or changes;
increased anxiety at any sign of novelty (dating, change of activity),
trying to escape from it.

How the person himself feels and explains it:

I am in control of life;
nothing interesting and good happens, but nothing bad happens either;
I am safe, the risks are minimized;
my future is determined, it is clear and precise.

The thought that something will happen that a person cannot change provokes a panic attack. Therefore, the individual avoids possible troubles with all his might, that is, he avoids life in all its manifestations. Doesn't meet friends, doesn't leave home, doesn't use public transport, etc.

Distinctive characteristics of those who are afraid of life

People who are afraid to live are devoid of meaning and purpose in life, ambitions, and plans. They are characterized by the following features.

Pessimism

The patient is fixated on shortcomings, obstacles, difficulties. He does not see opportunities, advantages, achievements. In any place he will see only the negative, for example, dirt and garbage instead of the beauty of the sea or evil people instead of secluded corners of nature. A pessimist loves to watch crime news, it reinforces his beliefs that life is full of negativity and the future looks bleak.

Anhedonia

Inability to rejoice, to have pleasure. A person perceives everything as mediocre, for granted. Nothing upsets him, but nothing makes him happy either. To put it simply, he is always and everywhere “no good.”

Catastrophization

Tendency to exaggerate. It started to rain - life was not good. If you spill coffee, your whole day is ruined. Such a person becomes fixated on minor failures and begins to scream. He becomes aggressive and becomes hysterical. The reason for this behavior is lack of self-confidence and a feeling of helplessness.

Fear of Inadequacy

I'm too young, too old, ugly, stupid - this is what a person thinks who avoids life because he is afraid of not meeting someone else's standards. He puts everything off for later or indefinitely, and finds reasons not to do it.

Suspiciousness and sensitivity

Hypersensitivity is a trait that allows you to be overly influenced by external influences that would hardly affect normal people. For example, an inability to tolerate constructive criticism (see How to Respond to Criticism) that other people typically tolerate is a sign of being overly sensitive.

To find out if you are an overly sensitive person, see if your answer to most of these questions is yes:

Are you hurt by words or comments that are said about your personality?
Are you unable to tolerate criticism?
Do you hate loud noise or loud music?
Do you feel other people's pain and suffering more than anyone else? (see Emotional Intelligence)
Are you slim or is your body smaller than your peers? (Ectomorph body type, very sensitive 99% of the time)
Do you stop for more than three minutes when you see an accident on the street to watch it?
Do you find it very difficult to tolerate high or low temperatures?
Do you find it very difficult to gain muscle mass by working out?
Do you have a lot of mood swings as a result of small events?

The life of a hypersensitive person

If you answered “yes” to most of the previous questions, then you are most likely an overly sensitive person. The life of a hypersensitive person is very different from the life of other people.

A hypersensitive person feels pain in an exaggerated way and therefore has trouble coping with life's difficulties. A highly sensitive person forms anchors or associations faster (see Anchor in Self-Hypnosis) than anyone else. For example, if he had a really bad experience in another country he visited, then after he returns he may hate the country as a whole because he associated the pain he felt with that place.

Fear of the future, causes of futurophobia

The reason is memories of negative changes in life. For example, a person is still tormented by the thought of someone’s death, the death of a pet, the illness of a loved one, or the suffering of a disabled person.

What other memories may bother you:

changes in personal life (divorce, separation, changes in partner’s behavior);
a move that made life difficult;
job loss;
loss of friends;
Road accidents, disasters, injuries;
hereditary diseases;
loss of economic, social, psychological stability;
illness;
other.

Suggestible, suspicious, exhausted individuals are susceptible to the influence of the media. In their case, the phobia may develop not against the background of personal experience, but after viewing shocking news, for example, a report about a terrorist attack. Moreover, the pressure may be minimal, but against the background of general exhaustion, this factor will become decisive.

What else are risk factors:

Adolescence. This is a period of active personality development, self-searching. A person has to answer two questions: “Who am I?” and “What am I?” Uncertainty, fear for the future, fear of the unknown, doubts about choosing a profession, hobbies are normal for this period of personality development.
Age crises, especially midlife crisis. Each crisis is characterized by a breakdown of the usual system of values and beliefs, analysis of the path traveled, comparison of expectations and reality, and making plans for the future. If at the age of 30–40 a person feels that he has achieved nothing in life, then the future scares him and looks sad in his eyes.
Psychotrauma. Any negative experience, sudden unpleasant changes. We discussed private options above. Psychological traumas from childhood are especially vividly remembered, for example, a child was constantly subjected to violence and punishment. Or one day he got seriously injured and got sick.
Psycho-emotional immaturity, infantilism. Self-doubt, fear of responsibility, feeling of helplessness - all these are traits of an infantile personality and elements of futurophobia. Such a person believes that his fate is predetermined and is in the power of higher powers or other people. He is used to shifting responsibility for his life onto other people's shoulders. If there is no such person, then futurophobia develops.
Conditions of development and education. Some parents intimidate their children, predicting a bad future if they do not obey mom and dad. Other children have to grow up in socially, politically, economically, and psychologically unstable conditions. All this leads to neuroticism of the individual.

It is important! Futurophobia can be an element of depression and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). In this case, differentiated diagnostics and treatment of the primary disease are needed.

How to overcome fear of future events

To get rid of a phobia, you need to see a psychologist, psychotherapist or psychiatrist. The problem is that patients themselves do not always admit the presence of a problem or do not realize the seriousness of their condition, and some are hampered by stereotypes and prejudiced attitudes towards psychiatrists. Therefore, in the treatment of futurophobia, the support of loved ones, attention, and care is very important. Under these conditions and the desire of the individual, the phobia can be dealt with independently.

Rethinking

How to overcome fear of the future? Use the method of revaluation, rethinking:

Divide the blank sheet into three columns.
In the first, write the problem.
In the second - methods of deliverance.
The third is what you have already done.

Assess your ability to solve the problem. Do the exercise in a quiet, secluded place. Relax first.

Get out of your comfort zone

Fear of the future is associated with fear of failure. You need to allow yourself to make mistakes and change your attitude towards mistakes. This is experience, opportunities for growth and development. Leaving your comfort zone is always associated with fear and discomfort. It is important to constantly challenge yourself, learn something new, and develop. Each time, self-confidence will be higher, it will be easier to start something new. Think about what you have wanted to do for a long time, but didn’t dare. It's time to take the first step.

The future is already here

In a broad sense, there is no tomorrow, there is no future, there is only the present. Realize this, accept it, and you will always be calm. Learn to live in the present and cope with it.

Be courageous

Realize that fear of the future is caused by negative memories of the past. Think about what lessons you can learn, what is in your control, and what you should just accept.

All in your hands

The past does not determine the future, environment and circumstances do not decide anything. Only the person himself controls his life. Take the position of master of life, learn to hear your needs and desires, and use all opportunities to improve your life.

Problems should be solved as they arise

Try to remember what bothered you a month ago, six months, a year. Don't remember? That's right, most worries never come to fruition. Start keeping a diary, write down all your worries, analyze what you imagined came true and what didn’t. Learn to spend energy not on fantasizing, but on solving problems in the present. There will never be a perfect moment, there will always be difficulties, you need to learn to solve them as they come.

To see the reason means to stop being afraid

It is necessary to know yourself, to understand what fear indicates. You probably cannot live fully, breathe deeply. Untapped potential, living against one’s essence, uncertainty gives rise to fear of the future. Accept your fears, anxieties, stop avoiding them.

Sensitivity and mood swings

Highly sensitive people are more likely to have low moods, depression and moodiness because their routine changes whenever a small event occurs.

An emotionally sensitive person is like a fragile person or someone who needs to be handled carefully. The biggest problem is that most people do not have enough knowledge to understand that they are dealing with an emotionally sensitive person, and therefore they can cause them a lot of pain without even realizing it.

A good thing you can do if you are overly sensitive is to use a technique called "emotion blocking" (See Relaxation Techniques) to prolong the periods when you feel happy.

Sensitivity and tears

Highly sensitive people may find it difficult to cope with the person they loved simply because they feel the pain that comes with the breakup in an exaggerated way.

If you are an overly sensitive person, and if you have any trouble outwitting someone, be sure to check out this guide:

You're not bad!!

There are many good things about being an emotionally sensitive person. First, an emotionally sensitive person feels people's suffering more than anyone else, and therefore, in most cases, they tend to be a pleasant and friendly person.

Emotionally sensitive people tend to be creative, which is why they sometimes excel in art or poetry.

Sensitivity and emotional wounds

If you try to pour water on a fresh wound, you will feel pain because when we widen the wound, we become oversensitive to factors that did not harm us before.

The same goes for emotional wounds. Being rejected as a child, self-doubt, and self-esteem issues (See Boost Self-Esteem) are all examples of unhealed wounds that can make you overly sensitive to things that others don't notice.

More information about self-esteem: https://help-psy.com/statii/rubrika5

How to deal with excessive sensitivity?

There are many ways that can help you deal with your oversensitivity, but most of them stem from one source, which is changing the way you think and the way you perceive situations.

After all, even if you are an overly sensitive person, you still won't feel bad after experiencing a situation before attaching a certain meaning to it. If you can change your thinking, you can reap the benefits of emotional sensitivity and avoid its downsides.

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